Chapter Text
Danny is the youngest son of Bruce Wayne, not Batman’s Robin. He doesn’t know a thing about the crime-fighting life of his dad and siblings. And the others, even Damian, want to keep it that way, keep him as the happiest child on Earth, out of the vigilante and hero’s world. So when they want to talk about their missions or experiences in fighting crimes with Danny’s presence, the Bat Family will translate it into something that sounds “civilian” so Danny doesn't feel left out. Sometimes, he also shares his normal days with the family, which could make all the pain and suffering they have endured worthwhile.
It happened on one of the rare days when almost all family members, including Jason, gather in the dining room for breakfast, and some topics about dating life have been brought up. While Jason (maybe even Tim, Damian, and Duke) laughs at Bruce and Dick’s messy love life, Danny says something about his opinions on dating, making everybody, even Alferd, frozen.
- I think as long as you are not in any formal relationship, it’s still okay to be intimated with other people. If not, how could you know who is the right person for you?
Danny says so casually after taking one bite of Alfred’s magical biscuit, hearing Jason’s stories about Dick almost getting slapped for being caught kissing a girl by another girl that he flirted with 30 minutes before (Aka Dick almost gets hammered by Harley Queen after being seen kissing Batgirl, and none of them are in any relationship), how Bruce not only forget his date at Gala last night but also mistake another lady as his date (Aka Batman abandons his date, Catwoman, to reach and take information from a mob’s wife, who involved the case he was working on; and the relationship between him and Catwoman is nothing serious).
Jason, being so caught off guard by what Danny said that he almost fell out of the chair, gets back his balance, and laughs back:
- It is right baby bro! So you should not get into any relationship so soon or you will lose all your chances with anyone suitable. Just wait until you have more than one suitor, let them fight each other until we find out who deserves a Wayne prince like you. (and “whoever last will be shot by me! No one dared to date my baby bro, he's too young for that”_ thought Jason.
Seeing what Danny said as a teenage joke, other family members start to laugh a little, Alfred lets out a release sigh while Dick, Tim, and Duke giggle loudly, even Bruce and Damian can’t stop the smirk on their faces. After all, Danny was always a little innocent child in their eyes, too young to know anything about adult relationships aside from the TV shows for teenagers.
With a big smile on his face, Dick asks Danny:
- So how many suitors our little dove are having right now? And who may have the highest chance to take your hand in a marriage?
Duke, who sits next to him, gives Dick a little nudge on the shoulder, then bend over at the table, and shakes himself with laughter.
And Danny answers cheerfully with a smile even bigger:
- There are three of them! And I will date the one who gave me their heritage ring. They said they would give it to me the next time we meet.
This time, even Damian couldn’t stop his smile, everyone believed it was definitely Danny’s joke based on some movies he had just seen. However, this time Tim feels something off so he stops laughing and asks Danny:
- Your suitors, do we know them?
With everyone beginning to laugh even louder, Damian snorts, feels like a joke kind of old:
- Really Timothy? Why would you want to know about Danny's suitors? They are just... (his made-up characters for a joke).
But before he could finish his sentence, Danny speaks in a bright voice:
- Yes you know him! They are people from the organization that Wayne has invested in. Dad even invites them to a party on our island every few months. And the latest party was three months ago. Do you all remember?
At that, everybody slowly gets frozen again. Alfred drops the glass of milk at the table in front of Bruce, so lucky it doesn't break or spill. The smiles on Dick and Jason’s faces turned to stone. Duke stops shaking and slowly rises his body up from a table as if considering if he just misheard something. Damian and Tim stared at each other, questioning what they just heard. And then, all of them turn their eyes on Danny, who still has such an innocent smile, and glitter eyes like he hasn’t just dropped an atomic bomb on his own family.
That is too specific to be just a joke, now the family realizes that Danny is telling the truth. Some bastards dare to court Danny, their little child, the smallest, the most native Wayne in this family without anyone knowing. How the f**k that could even happen!
Jason's eyes begin to fill with flames of rage, Dick looks at the dining knife in his eyes with a blank face, Duke doesn’t have his “chill vibe” like usual, Damian holding his teeth tightly so that Tim next to him can hear a clenching sound. Alfred shows no emotions in his face but he does glance at the wall, where the rifles are hanging. Bruce and Tim run their brains like supercomputers to find exactly what organization’s members dare to come near the youngest Wayne after taking Wayne’s investment. All their thoughts run for a few seconds.
The organization that Wayne has invested in? - Wayne has invested in hundreds of organizations and industries in and outside Gotham.
Bruce invites them to a party every few months? – Bruce hosts a party every month, sometimes every week, depending on how much it is needed to cover up or get information for Batman.
Host a party on Wayne’s island? The Wayne has a lot of islands, more than .... Oh, wait!
Both Bruce and Tim stop thinking, then look each other in the eyes and realize they are thinking about one answer, one horrified answer.
Bruce clears his voice, catching everyone's attention, including Danny, who doesn't notice their family’s sudden silence. Bruce tries to keep his voice calm, sounding as joyful as normal:
- Danny honey, the island you said is the one near Ecuador? Where our family usually hosts a party with our friends and the Justice League, right?
The other members start to realize what Bruce means, their eyes widen, turn their heads, and focus on Danny, waiting for his answer.
Danny still not aware of the situation, replies happily:
- Yes, that one, the Justice League is the organization that I talked about. I still remember the last time we went to that island, Damian even invited his friend Jon, and Tim invited his friend Kon for the first time and introduced them to me. But both Superboys didn’t come, and Dad said because they had plans with their friends.
He even confirms the information about the last party, so proud of his memories, making Batman, Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin, Robin, and Signal could not deny it in any way.
The Bats had hosted those parties because their hero friends wanted to meet Danny, the only Dove in a family of Bats and Robins, the only child of Batman who does not fight crime on the streets. Then, the first party was hosted to introduce the team with Danny, as a family’s friends or hero team that Wayne had invested in, depending on their choices. And Danny, as a sweet child as he always is, is adored by everyone. So, those parties have become traditional for all heroes to interact with Danny, and meet up with each other outside the works and world’s ending matters.
And now, Danny is telling them that their colleagues, the heroes ones, are courting their son, their brother for at least three f**k months. And maybe even sooner? And all the heroes who happen to show up at those parties are much much older than Danny, even the young ones like The Flash or Super Boys are older than Danny by nearly ten years (actually Kon and Bart are not that old because one is a clone and one from the future but the Bats don’t care) That bastard..., NO, not one but three, three bastards who dare to come near Danny!!!
Tim, suffering in a silent rage like his brothers, suddenly remembers one thing that Danny had said:
- Danny, did you say earlier that you will choose the one who gave you his heritage ring? And how could you choose if they give them the same time? Have you thought about that?
His other brothers, especially Jason and Damian, give him a look as if he has gone crazy for even thinking that they would let Danny choose anyone in those soon-be-death-bastards. Even Bruce and Alfred look at him unsure what he means. But Danny answers undoubtedly:
- Of course, I have thought about that! Because there are three of them but only one ring. So, only one could give me a ring and date me!
And something clicked.
-And why their heritage rings are one? Do they have the same heritage ring?
Dick, with his eyes wide open, asks something so silly that Jason, Damian, or maybe Duke would have laughed at him if they not also be shocked by what Danny said. Even Tim, who had guessed about it, was still surprised when it was true.
Bruce, who has gone through a lot, finally truly calms his head down. He gently takes an empty milk jar in Alfred’s hand and puts it down at the table, making a small sound that awakens his butler and his sons. All of his sons look at him, even Danny who is giggling about Dick's “funny” question. Then Bruce talks slowly, trying to make his voice as joyful as before, like a dad happy to hear about his son’s love life, not a Batman who is considered crossing his “no killing rule” for one, no, three exceptions:
- So let Daddy guess, all of your suitors are from the same family, aren’t they?
Danny finds it funny how his Dad sounds like Alfred when he tells a fairy tale to Danny and his brothers just like when he was a child. So he answers back with his childish voice:
- Yes! Yes, they are!
Bruce continues:
- And they are the Kent, aren’t they?
Damian is counting Kryptonite stones and Red Sunlight devices that he could have in an hour. He then looks at Tim, only to catch Tim also looking at him, understanding.
So I will get all the Kryptonite stones and Red Sunlight devices I need within 20 minutes. Then, I would call Jon to meet up ...- think Damian.
And I gonna contact with Kon... – think Tim.
Before Tim and Damian finish their plan for the Kryptons, Danny talks, still in his child-like voice:
- No! No, they are not!
Lucky for you Kon/ Jon and your Dad! – Think Tim and Damian.
Bruce says again, with a blank face:
- And they are the Allens, aren’t they?
Oh, Dick thinking, the Flashes are some of the sweetest heroes in the community. It is so sad that they can not resist falling in love with Danny and even dare to act on it. I gonna miss them so much. Next, what is the first thing I should prepare now, frozen guns or an electricity net?
Just before Dick can act on his plan, Danny talks again, still unaware that his family is on fire:
- No! No, they are not!
Just like I know, the Flashes are the sweetest heroes in the community. – Dick rewrites his memory.
Finally, Bruce asks:
- So Danny, what family do your suitors come from?
This time, Danny stands up, holding his arms out to announce cheerfully:
- They come from Phantom’s family! They are the Phantom!
With Danny answered, even Bruce almost lost his cold head, his proud calm, and went straight to be a nutshell.
Jason and Duke don’t care who courts Danny with the belief that they will kill those guys despite whatever their family name is. However, Phantom? Did Danny just say Phantom?
Jason looks at Duke, Duke looks at Jason, then they both look at Dick. Dick’s pupils danced up and down, still not understanding what Danny said. Tim and Dimian stare at the air on their plate, still loading the words. Then, all of them, including Alfred, who didn’t move for a while, turn to look at Bruce.
In the end, they all go to the conclusion that no one had misheard it, Danny, their little dove/ baby bro/small prince is getting court by The Phantoms, aka the Infinite Realms royalty?
Damian, couldn’t hold his emotions anymore:
- What an actual f**k Daniel?
He raises his voice and makes everyone jump a little. Tim is kind of surprised that Damian is the first to break and curse, not Jason. And Jason, a poor guy seems to lose his soul. He is close with the Dan Phantoms, like how close Tim was with Kon and Damian with Jon, and now he knows that his friend may hit on his baby bro.
Danny is confused as to why his brother Damian seemed so angry:
- What's wrong with me, Dami? And why did you swear? Alfred is right there ...
Bruce cuts in:
- The Phantom you said, honey? Like the ones who have white hair and ...
- And a green aura! – Danny finished for his Dad.
Yes, yes, it is surely the Phantom, Infinite Realms royalty, the powerful gods of life and death, and anything in between. But, Dick just wants to make sure:
- What are their names, Dove?
- They are Phantom, Wrath, and Plasmius. – confirmed Danny.
So there is no denying it! Danny even said their hero’s names and titles. So all has been confirmed, Danny, the only normal child and the loved child of the Wayne, the Batfamily has been involved with the Phantoms, the Infinite Realms royalty, the one that both the Justice League, the Justice League Dark still afraid of, Batman even have nearly a million back-up plans for them knowing none of it may work. Not only that, he was wooed by the King of Ghost, the King of Ghost's brother, and the King of Ghost's uncle. WHAT AN ACTUAL F**K?
Then all of them, including Alfred, looking at Bruce, blame him in their minds: "That surely is your fault!"