Work Text:
Spencer knows His Team has a hard time accepting His.. quirks. He knows they dislike His rambles, they find His Stimmung weird and they don't understand it when He needs time to himself when He's overstimulated. They don't get it. And that's fine.
Still, Spencer is Hurt when He realized they only rarely invite him to outings.
The First time He notices is when they all come into the Office, laughing after a calm Weekend withno Case. They are saying stuff that Had propably become an inside Joke over the Weekend. Spencer doesn't understand it. The only Person who seems to realize is Garcia, she tells him they Just asumed he'd want some alone time.
After a while He notices it happends more often. They don't even try. During the day they make Out Times to hang Out on after Work. They don't ask Spencer.
They Talk about food they want to eat, who shoud Cook or where they wanna eat. They don't ask Spencer.
Spencer gets aspecialy saddend during the Holidays. A few ask eachother what they think woud He a suitabel Gift. Nobody ask's or tells Spencer anything.
Spencer Starts doubting that they Just forgot more than ever.
---
The Others hold a Christmas Party with their Kids and a few Close people, Like their lovers or a few relatives and Friends.
"Dad? Where is Spencer? You never invite him anymore" hotxh Turns to His so'n, the Attention now in him and His son.
Hotxh feels uncomftorble, Bit explains hesitantly. "Well, Spencer has a few.. quirks.. He can be a piece of Work to be around.." He Starts explaining, He knows the whole Team thinks so, Hut saying it feels wrong.
Then one of the Others relatives speaks Up, someone who Had never meet Spencer, or Heard of him.
"Wait, who?" She asks.
"A College" jj says. And then it Starts going Downhill.
"A College? Why have i never Heard of him?" Another person says.
Morgan speaks Up. "As hotch Said, He got some quirks.." hotxh coud Tell those words we're Just as uncomftorble to him as to Morgan.
"That's why you don't invite him? What does He do? Sputter curse words? Touch people?" Someone chimes in.
Emily Shakes her head. "No, Not at all. He's nice. It's just-" she struggles to get it Out.
"What? You don't wanna say it? If you don't wanna say what Brings you to Not invite him, i'll give you a hint, then it's wrong."
"You don't get it" Rossi says. "He's majorly autistic, rememberd everything and has a massive IQ. You Talk with him about anything and suddendly you know stuff you coud've Lived without. He does These weird Things with His hands and he's Just very difficult." Rossi States, His older age seemingly making it easier to let These Things Slide Off of His tounge.
An Argument ensues.
---
It was dark, Spencer hadn't even bought a Christmas tree, what for? There we're No presents to Put under it. For who qodu they even be? He coud buy himself stuff anytime. And he'd already bought His Colleges presents, he'd Put them into their desks after they left for their Christmas Party. He hoped they'd Like them.
Then He wonderd If they got him Something. But then He dismisses the Idea.
He looked around His Apartment, except for esencials and books, He barley Had anything.
Except..
He Had one Thing. One Thing that coud Change this sad Christmas day.
He slowly crept to hsi bathrooms, unlocking the cabinet above His sink.
He looked at His colection of medication. He wonderd. Did He have dilaudid? No, He got rid of that Long ago. Hm.. He did have pain medications. Hard ones. No. Those we're boring, only Made him even more Numb. Then He spotted spare razor Blades he'd Gotten for His razor. They we're fresh and neat.
He grabbed them and sat down on the bathrooms Floor. He slowly unpacked the still unopend Box of razor Blades and grabbed the First one.
He rolled Up His pants, revealing old, think scars from other Times he'd sat down in the bathroom.
He slowly Slide it across his thigh. He felt the blood slowly Rose to meet the very top of His skin and start to Fall from the Side of His Leg onto the neat tiles.
He did it again, eatching the blood dripping to the Floor again and again.
When He Out some band aids on, He decided to Clean the blood, and then started cleaning His Apartment.
Again. And again. And again.
He was cleaning untill He Heard His Alarm ringing. Had He been cleaning that Long? He Mad ehinself a Coffee and got ready for Work.
When He arrived the Others weren't there yet. They'd propably be a Bit hungover today, from their Christmas Party Yesterday. Aspecialy Emily, He knew she liked to get drunk.
He looked at the neatly placed presents, Just Like he'd Put them Yesterday.
---
When the Team arrived, they looked at the presents happily. They looked at Spencer, who was already deep into his Work. They assumed he'd already Put His present away or Something. Nobody opend them and decided to Open them once they we're Home.
They rememberd the Argument Yesterday coldly. We're they really in the wrong? Should they apologized? Had Spencer even noticed? All they knew was that they felt terrible.
---
Once hotch was Home, He opend the presents, well, he'd Gotten two. One was for His son and the other for him. He opend His sons too, to See If it was allright to give him. It was, His so'n Had actualy wanted that for Christmas, but hotch Had given him Something different that he'd also wanted.
Then he'd opend His own, it Had a Note. Huh.
/Hotch,
I Hope you enjoy this book.
I didn't know what you'd want,
So i got you a book i thought
You'd enjoy.
Spencer/
This Gift was from Spencer? He hadn't even thought of hiftinf Spencer anything.. now He felt even worse. Worst of it all? Hotch ready the Back of the books and was excited about Reading it.
He have His son the Gift he'd Gotten for him from Spencer and His son started asking when he'd See Spencer again, to thank him.
Hotch wanted to burr, himself. He woud give Spencer anything He asked for, No Matter the cost, He felt so horrible.
---
When Derek got Home, He greeted His Dog and then pulled Out His Gifts. One was adressed to his Dog. A chewing toy, His Dog immediatley loved it.
Then He opend His. A Note.
/Morgan,
I know you Love
Kurt vonnegut,
So i got you a book
Of His i don't think
You ready yet.
If so, i coud get
You a diffrent one.
Spencer/
These Gifts we're from Spencer? And he'd rememberd hsi favorite author? God really wanted to kick His Ass right now.
---
The Others all called eachother, Feeling similar about their Gifts from Spencer. Emily Had Gotten Gifts for herself and her Cats, she'd Gotten expensive wine, one she'd never been able to afford before, and some Cat stuff. JJ ha dgotten Gifts for her son's and He rhusband aswell as herself.
Garcia Had Gotten the Most wonderfull and sparkyl bow and Rossi Had also Gotten some stuff.
That morning they didn't think they coud've felt any worse, and they'd been Proven wrong. They now knew Spencer did Care, that Spencer has carefully picked Gifts He was confident they woud Like, Gifts He was confident they woud enjoy, and they did. The Loved them. And even If they woud Gift him Something, they woudn't know what. Books? He propably owned any they'd give him. Clothes? But where from? What was His size? And that were their Options.
---
Spencer knew they thought that he'd Gotten a Gift too, that someone Else Had given them all Gifts. So He grabbed His pain Killers.
He didn't want to feel anything.
The First Thing they assumed was that someone Else Had gifted them stuff.
He shoved down the pills.
Was He the Problem? He was. He took more.
Maybe they woudn't even noticed If He didn't got o Work tomorrow. Or the day after..
He started Feeling Numb. Number than ever. His mind went whoozy and He let himself slide down the wall untill He felt the tiles. Did He feel them? He didn't know. He looked at the Wall and He coud've sworn He Heard His Doorbell. Meh. His mind was messed Up at the Moment.
---
The next morning the Team got to Work, but Spencer wasn't there yet. They thought His Bus May have been late. And then the hours passed. And passed. And then the day ended.
They called him. No reply.
They called again. Nothing.
Then they went to His House. They rang the Doorbell. Nothing.
A neighbor saw them. "Are you looking for the Guy that lives there?"
"We are" hotch replied. "Do you know where He is?"
"There we're paramedics at His Apartment Yesterday. I think they took him to the Hospital."
They thanked the neighbor and got into the Car, letting Garcia figure Out in wich Hospital He was, and then proceded too Drive there.
---
"We are looking for Spencer reid, He was brought in Yesterday" hotch Said at the reception.
"Im sorry but you cannot visit him right now." The receptionist stated.
"Why not?" Emily asked, agitated.
"He is in critical condition, only doctors are permited to See him." The receptionist explained.
---
The next few days we're a blurr, they'd gotten a Case. They tried their best to get a hold of Infos on Spencer while keeping Up with a Case without their strongest asset in analysing. It was hard. More victims died than what shoud've been.
Then they visited the Hospital once they got Back.
"He can He visited, but he's Not awake."
When they walked into His room they didn't expect him to Look so.. so Pale.. and dead.
His Hair was undkempt, unlike him entierly. His skin was glossy and deathly Pale, an oxygen tube was sticking from His Mouths, helping him breath. He was hooked Up to Machines and Tubes they never woud've wanted to See.
They stayed with him often.
They brought flowers and later Christmas presents. He only woke Up in feburary. Early feburary, but still.
Emily was there that day, bringing him more Gifts. His room was full of Gifts. The longer He Had bene unconcious, the more Gifts they'd added.
Emily Had been brushing His Hair, she knew He hated when it was tangled.
He looked at her, and she was in shock at First, then called nurses to remove the breathing tube.
He needed a Bit before He spoke. "How Long..?"
"It's the 11th of feburary." She Said as she sat besides him.
He looked taken aback.
---
He was permited to Go Home after a pshycic Evaluation after 1 week. In that week He Had Not often been alone. The one Case the Team had been on, Garcia Had nested herself into spencers Hospital room. And the time they hadn't been, they we're often there, with and without Kids.
When He got Home, JJ was with him, helping him get the many presents and flowers Home.
Then He started working again in feburary 21st.
The Team were Happy He was there and never interupted His rants, even seemingly enjoying Just Hearing His voice. They looked at him as He stimmed, studying the Hand movements He so rythmicly did.
They invited him to everything. Hotch invited him everytime His son wanted to See spencer, wich was often.
As did JJ.
And Morgan also invited Spencer to Just hang Out and cuddle with Clooney, his Dog, wich Spencer enjoyed doing on stressfull days or Times when He was overstimulated.
He enjoyed movie nighty with Garcia and some late-night Talks with Emily, and enjoyed being spoiled by rossis cooking,g wich He often brought to Work in Tupperware Just for Spencer.
The Gifts he'd Gotten in his coma Had been books, Most Not His taste of books He already Had, but He still ready every Page more carefully than ever and Had Put them ona Special bookshelf.
The flowers he'd Gotten were being carefully taken Care of.
When Spencer was away, His neighbor cared for them, wich Spencer apreciated.
The drawings He now regularly recived from hsii Friends Kids we're hung on His Wall. As we're Pictures of His Team, their Kids and Clooney. He now Had a DVD Player and Movies Garcia recomended to him incase He wanted to watcha movie alone. He did, when He wanted to feel Garcia in a night alone.
He tried cooking food after recipies He saw online, so He coud feel Like Rossi was there for him when He coudn't be, it did, Hut it coud never Beat Rossi.
The next Christmas was spent with Spencer. They have him a Cat. Spencer named him Jamie.