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So, okay, it was taking a little longer than they expected. And, yeah, their friends and family were starting to get on their nerves about it. Also, sure, they needed to make a decision before they left the hospital tomorrow. But naming a human person was a lot harder than either of them had expected.
It wasn’t like they hadn’t discussed it beforehand. It was just, see, they hadn’t exactly agreed on much of anything before then. Starfish had come up, of course. Several times. But Juliet made her opinion on that one clear from the start.
After days of fielding suggestions from loved ones (the O’Haras had a lot of family names, as it turned out, each more hideous than the last), they finally decided to just hunker down and pick one. Having her there with them certainly helped. It’s hard to name something you’ve never actually seen before.
So, Juliet with her books, Shawn with an overactive imagination, and little No-Name Spencer without a care in the world, they started brainstorming.
“Pumpernickel.”
“Shawn.”
Things were off to a rough start. Juliet, for one, was still hung up on having the name be “vintage,” or whatever, and Shawn just wanted to give her something that would sound cool without getting her bullied. The overlap between those two, it seemed, was pretty much nonexistent.
“Look, Jules, I already said no to Millicent,” he repeated. “She’s not a librarian. Besides, we basically already used that. It would be like having two kids with the same name.”
“Shawn, that was for an investigation, and she wasn’t even real.”
He feigned offense. “Is that really all she was to you?”
She sighed, smiling. “Look, I’m fine parting with Millie, but I’m not negotiating on giving her a vintage name.”
“And that’s, you know, that’s fine,” he mustered. “I have no strong opinions about that whatsoever. So, go ahead, let me hear them.”
She opened her book to one of its (many) color-coordinated tabs. “Okay. How about Ingrid?”
“That sounds like a type of bird.”
“Margot?”
“No silent letters. I don’t get the point.”
“Evelyn?”
“Come on, Jules, you know I could never spell that.”
She closed her book, defeated. “Alright, genius, what have you got?”
Shawn hadn’t exactly thought that far ahead. (When did he ever?) He was more of an improv guy, really. At this point, though, those skills weren’t going to get him very far.
“Car…tridge?”
She just looked at him. “Really?”
“You put me on the spot, I panicked, alright? Just give me a second.” He thought for a moment before speaking up again. “Jenkins.”
“This is a baby, Shawn. We’re naming a human baby.”
“Ginger.”
“No.”
“Almond.”
“Almond?”
“What about Cookie?”
“Shawn, are you hungry?”
He paused. “A little.”
“There should be a granola bar in the bag,” she said, pointing him to the corner of the room. “I really need you to take this seriously.”
“I am taking it seriously!” he argued. “Alright, only actual real people names from here on out. What about Iris?”
“That’s the Chief’s daughter.”
“Lily?”
“That’s Lassiter’s.”
“...Shawn?”
“Shawn, that’s your name.”
“Jules, I know, like, ten people, tops. I don’t have a lot to work with here.”
Juliet sighed. “Shawn, I just want to have something to call her already.” Tears welled in her eyes. “It’s killing me. It’s like I can’t really talk to her or sing to her or connect with her. It’s like she’s not really ours.”
“Hey, hey, Jules,” Shawn said softly, sitting on the side of the bed and taking her hands in his. “She is ours. Our perfect little potato. That’s not going to change.”
He stood, walking over to the bassinet and picking up their daughter, careful not to wake her. Juliet moved to make room for him and he laid down next to her, resting the baby in her arms.
“I’m sorry I’ve been so stubborn about the name,” he whispered. “It’s just, I mean, look at her, Jules. How could one name possibly capture something so remarkable?” Shawn smiled. “I still can’t believe she’s really here.”
Juliet sniffed, smiling, as he wiped a tear from her face. “We did good, didn’t we?”
“Oh, definitely. I mean, I’ve seen tens of babies. This is by far the best one.” He reached to the bedside table to grab the baby name book. “So, let’s go through all the names you’ve highlighted until we find one that’s as perfect as she is.”
Opening the book, he found a chapter listing names from movies. He couldn’t help himself. “Just humor me, here. For one second.”
She didn’t object, so he flipped through, though not finding much. He wasn’t entirely sure who in their right mind would name their child Hermione. “See, this is just ridiculous. Wilbur? I mean, not only is it a terrible name, but who would name their kid after a cartoon pig?”
Something caught Juliet’s eye. “Wait,” she said, pointing to the name listed below it. “Shawn, look.”
Charlotte.
He went to object, but he found he didn’t have any good reason to. “Charlotte,” he pondered, seeing how it felt.
“You could call her Charlie,” Juliet suggested. He was a sucker for a good nickname.
“But like…the spider, though?”
“She was a pretty cool spider.”
“She was a cool spider.” He looked back down at their daughter, who had started to wake up. He tried the name a few times again, just to be sure. “Charlotte. Charlie. My daughter, Charlie Spencer.”
Juliet smiled. “You seem pretty sold.”
“It’s, I mean, it’s kind of perfect,” he admitted. “It has the old lady vibes you wanted and it comes with an automatic nickname? Jules, I think we found the one.” In Juliet’s arms, little Charlie started to stir. Shawn grinned. “I think she agrees.”
Juliet looked down at her, her little blue eyes just starting to open. “Good morning, Charlotte. Glad you decided to join us.”
“Jules, it’s, like, 5PM.”
Her gaze never left her daughter. “I’ve heard it both ways.”
They stared at her a while longer. Now that she had the name, it was as if she’d finally come to life. Charlie stretched her little arms, yawning.
“God, she’s perfect, Shawn.”
“Some baby,” he agreed.
A nurse entered the room quietly. “Just checking in,” she said. “I don’t suppose you’ve made progress on the name, have you?”
“As a matter of fact, we just decided,” Shawn responded proudly.
“Excellent! I’ll get the paperwork started. What’s the first name?”
“Charlotte,” replied Juliet, still staring at her.
“That’s lovely. And a middle name?”
They froze. Shawn reached for the baby book again. “How much time did you say we have?”