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ꃲꎡ꒦ꄡꁄꅐꅔꒄꍈꁄ doing his best to bond with his newly acquired crèche of thoroughly traumatized, mildly murderous, homesick, and generally troublesome terran children. Was this what he had in mind when he decided to expand his family via abduction of orphans? Probably not, but hey they're all stuck in space together so at least he can't lose them.
Probably.
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Ch1
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Precious Things Are Earned by ScatheAriiasqDrayceon [chaptered fic]
Alternative title: How I Learned To Stop Worrying & Love The Giant Flesh-Eating Alien In The Room: Batkids edition. Inspired by I'll Happily Take You All by Nostalgic__Moon.