Work Text:
Dean wiggles around on his bed, trying to find a comfortable position. He manages it for about five minutes before his son starts kicking all over again. Sighing, defeated, he sits up and rubs his hands over his belly. He glances at Sam, making sure he's still asleep, before getting up from the bed.
He limps half-sleep out of their bedroom to the kitchen and heats up a cup of milk. He read somewhere that warm milk helps babies to fall asleep. Or maybe Sam told him that, he can't remember anymore. Not that Dean thinks it will work anyways because Little Dude here seems to be intent on partying all night.
It really wasn't much of a problem when the baby began moving, but since day one of this week Dean has started to really feel the kicks and elbows, and they aren't as fun anymore. Don't get him wrong, he's glad Little Dude is fine and showing off, but Dean would appreciate it if he did it just during the day. He's very thankful his ribs have healed already because having bruised ribs when your kid won't stop moving would have been a bitch.
It has been four weeks since his accident in the bathroom, and while only his hurt ankle is left as the physical reminder, he's still reeling from the fact that things could have been so much worse. So the baby moving, and the nightmares that sometimes he gets where the baby not moving at all because he's dead, aren't helping much on allowing Dean to sleep at night.
Dean takes the cup from the microwave and shuffles-limps to the sofa. He sits, lifting his still-healing ankle on the cushion, and turns on the T.V to some infomercial he doesn't pay much attention to because it's just background noise, and makes sure to turn the volume down. He doesn't want Sam to wake up and try to stay up with him out of empathy; Sam's pretty tired himself and Dean would feel guilty if his brother didn't get any sleep either when he has to work in the morning.
He feels a strong kick to his side, making him gasp.
“Christ, what are you doing in there, dancing?” he says to his belly and gets another kick in response. “Okay, how about I drink this milk, and then you go to sleep, huh?”
After the milk is gone, Dean waits for the movement to slow down or stop, but, two hours later, he's nodding off and waking up every time he feels another kick. He groans and slides down on the sofa, coming to terms that tonight will be another sleepless night.
~*~
Dean wakes up with a start to find Sam, all refreshed, observing him with a cup of what he assumes is coffee in his hands. The smell coming from the cup reminds Dean how much he misses drinking coffee, and he gives Sam a dirty look even if he doesn't deserve it, because he can have all the coffee he wants. Dean then glances at the clock to find out he's only been asleep for half an hour.
“Damn.”
“Is there a reason why you're here and not in bed?” Sam asks taking a sip of his caffeine.
“Didn't want to wake you,” Dean grunts, sitting up.
Sam frowns. “And why were you awake?”
“Uh, kid kinda likes to do the boogie during my resting time.”
Sam squints suspiciously. “How long?”
Dean rolls his eyes. “It just started happening, mom.”
Sam huffs. “Have you tried—?”
“At this point, I've tried everything I know, Sammy.”
Sam hums and says nothing else. Dean takes that as the conversation being over and heads out to the bathroom. He's gonna need a really cold shower to keep him awake today.
~*~
Dean spends most of his work hours trying not to fall asleep. It doesn't help that today decides to be a slow day, and barely a few customers come by.
Machado's Antique Restorations is located about five stores down from The Yellow Brick Road book store, where Sam works. Which is how Dean found out one day walking to visit Sam at work that Mrs. Machado was looking for someone to temporally help her at the store until her grandson comes back from studying abroad for a few months. It seems the perfect job for Dean, and great for Mrs. Machado to get the help she needs. In all honestly, he had been going crazy doing nothing at home, and getting a job hadn't been too easy in a small town where jobs were scarce.
Dean likes it because he can do different things, and he can use his hands to help and learn about restoring antiques. Today though, he is currently manning the cash register, and Mrs. Machado keeps sending him worried looks any time Dean nods off.
“Dean, corazón, I think you should head home early,” she says with her thick Mexican accent punctuating her words, two hours before closing.
“I'm fine.”
“Any minute now your face is going to meet with the cash register. You are not fine.”
Dean gives a sheepish look. “I'm just a little tired. I can make it through closing.”
“And, as your boss, I'm telling you to go home early because this is as dead as the black sea, and I can manage to be by myself the rest of the time. Go home,” she says, giving him a stern glare that would make anybody think twice before crossing her.
“Alright, alright. I'll leave and be back tomorrow morning. Happy now?”
“Very. Tell Sam I said to give you a foot massage. That will knock you out,” she says jokingly.
Dean laughs.
~*~
Dean wakes up again on the sofa, who's become his best friend lately, after barely closing his eyes for fifteen minutes to find Sam staring at him with worry written all over his face. Dean knows the picture he must be painting isn't pretty; he's seen the dark bags under his eyes, and his pale face on the mirror the past few mornings.
“Still?” Sam states morosely like it was him awake all night for two weeks now and not Dean.
“Ya think?” Dean grouses.
Sam sighs and offers the cup to Dean, apologetic. Dean greedily takes a sip of the hot coffee before regretfully giving his savior back to Sam.
Sam sits next to him, taking Dean's leg on the sofa to place over his thighs. “Maybe you should call in and stay. That way you could get some sleep.” He suggests carefully, and Dean can tell he's afraid Dean will take it the wrong way.
Dean shakes his head. “I'm not going to miss days on the job I just started working at, Sammy.”
“But, Dean—“
“I won't sleep anyways. I'll just waste a day of work for nothing, and we do need the money.”
Sam deflates a little. “There's gotta be a way to help you. You can’t just keep going on like this.”
Dean stands up slowly; muscles popping when he stretches. “Tell you what, we'll ask Sabine when we go to see her next week.”
Sam nods, obviously upset at not having any other ideas on how to fix this. “Let's have some breakfast, then.”
Dean follows him to the kitchen and later tries to not to face-plant in his scrambled eggs.
This is going to be another long day.
2.
It's not like Dean isn't used to sleepless nights. He could count, and run out of fingers, the number of times he lost so much sleep he lived mainly on a lot of caffeine and whiskey. But this is different because even when he does catch some shut-eye, he's still bone tired. Also, no coffee or whiskey to keep him awake anymore.
Sabine, his androcologist, doesn't seem too worried about it once Sam tells her about the sleeping problem.
“I mean, it's not that it's okay for you to be missing so much sleep, but it's quite normal that during the pregnancy the baby becomes very active, and with less space in there to move as the weeks go by, you will notice it more and be uncomfortable.” She explains, combing a stray curl away from her face.
Dean scratches his stubble absently. “What can I do about it?”
“Well, since you have tried some things on your own already, all I have to advise you is to sleep whenever you can. Take naps during the day.”
“That sounds like a great idea,” Sam interjects, pointedly glancing at Dean.
“But—“ Dean goes to protest.
“I know you're working. I mean after work and on your days off, take as many naps as possible during the day. Also, you can try other stuff like music, for example. I'll give you a list of other things you could do as well.”
“Music?”
“Sometimes a soft-toned song can do the trick to get the baby to sleep.”
“Huh,” Sam says, pensive. “We should try that out too.”
“Do that, and let me know how it goes. I'm also going to prescribe you some vitamins to help out.”
“Okay.” Dean sighs.
“How's your ankle?”
Dean makes a face, knowing already what's to come. He was hoping Sabine wouldn’t mention his accident at all. No such luck. “It's fine.”
“Well, do me a favor and avoid having accidents while I'm out of town.” Sabine jokes, smile wrinkling the corner of her eyes over her chocolate skin.
“I didn't do it on purpose!” Dean protests.
Sabine chuckles at Dean's pout. “I know. Just be careful.” She asks, green eyes sincere and with worry.
Dean sighs again. “I'm trying.”
“I'm keeping an eye on him,” Sam adds, ignoring the glare Dean sends his way.
Sabine pats Dean on the shoulder. “That's all I wanted to hear. Now get out of my office. As much as I like you two, I’ve got other patients to see.”
~*~
The vitamins do shit.
The naps are almost impossible because as tired as he is, Dean still can't go to sleep. He's too wired up to relax knowing Sam isn't home, and he starts going through scenarios where Sam needs his help and he doesn't get it because Dean is too deep asleep to wake up. It's a problem, he knows that. You would think that no incidents since they moved to Queentribes, and even before that, would calm his paranoia down. But it runs in his blood after years of dealing with so much supernatural crap, and he can be okay if Sam isn't home and safe.
So he's left with trying some music. Of course, Sam, the overachiever that he is, finds every kind of classical and soothing music he can get his hand on at work. They try everything; from classics like Beethoven and Mozart to nature sounds. Nothing. The kid simply doesn't want to sleep at night.
Dean starts to fear that this is how it's going to be once the baby is born. He's prepared for the sleepless nights, but knowing that the baby won't catch the sleep necessary for him, is worrying.
Sam decides to try other things on the list Sabine gave them. He gets some books and reads to the baby. That puts Dean to sleep instead of the baby who wakes him up half an hour later. They try taking walks around the block—because that's all Dean can manage for now with his ankle still bothering him— to tire Dean out to the point he can't even keep his eyes open. It works only for about an hour, but at least Dean gets a little sleep in those days.
They even try having more sex, which seems to make the baby even more active, so that one option goes flying out the window pretty quickly.
To be honest, Dean is so tired of everything by the end of the month that he just gives up; decides this is how things are going to be and he better get used to it.
~*~
By the beginning of his seventh month, he's gotten a bit used to not sleeping. Even resolving his issue with the naps— after he had come clean to Sam about his nightmares and his paranoia—and taking a few while Sam was home from work instead of pretending, he could keep up with the no sleeping problem. And Dean has decided to just take every good thing he can and focus on that - like his ankle is doing better, and he's not limping anymore; like the baby is healthy, and they're still safe.
At this point, Dean doesn't even pretend he's going to get some sleep and lets Sam go to bed by himself. Which sucks, because as comfortable as the sofa is, he misses his bed and —don't let Sam find out this—lying next to the human furnace that is his brother.
He's been marathoning every movie and shows he could find to keep himself entertained. But there's only so many he can watch before there's none left. He starts to read too, although that only makes him more sleepy and it's hard to keep his eyes open three chapters in. Then he starts to read about lore, just in case he's cursed or something because this has gone long enough already, and finds nothing that can point out something supernatural is happening to him.
It's times like this, when he's alone, that he lets himself still miss his previous life. This new life isn't bad, as normal as it is, and they're safer. He and Sam finally have something neither ever thought they could have after all that's happened to them. But he can't help missing the rush of the hunt, saving lives, putting an end to the monsters that cause trouble.
Most of all, he misses the long drives between hunts and motels. The sound of his baby's engine over the music playing on his radio, Sam sitting at his side, talking about the next case, or simply getting some shut-eye; the different backroads, each with their unique landscapes, some boring, some amazingly beautiful. He misses the times they stopped in the middle of the night to stargaze and drink a beer, not saying a word because it wasn't necessary. Call him crazy, but he even misses the times they had to spend the night in the car.
With that thought, Dean puts the book away and walks towards the end of the kitchen where the door connects with the garage and grabs the keys to the car on his way. The Impala is sitting in the middle of the garage - that's supposed to be Dean's sanctuary to take care of the car, but he hasn't spent as much time in it as he wants to. Well, not until Little Dude is born and they're past the first months of going crazy with a new baby.
Dean opens the passenger door and climbs inside. He would prefer to sit on the other side, but at the rate, his belly is growing, he barely fits behind the wheel anymore. He rubs his belly absently over the movements of the baby. Dean glances over the whole car, taking in the smell of leather before he puts the key in the ignition and turns on only the battery. With more difficulty than he's willing to accept, he gets the box with his cassette collection from under the seat, randomly selects one, and inserts it into the radio.
Simple Man, starts playing inside the car and Dean feels himself relaxing. He scoots down until his head is resting on the seat, and lets Lynyrd Skynyrd’s lyrics wash over him as he drifts off thinking about the old times spent in what had been for so long their home.
He's startled by a knock on the window. When he blinks his eyes clear and looks out of it he sees Sam staring at him with an incredulous eyebrow. Dean’s lowering the window when he realizes that no music is coming out of the radio anymore.
“What?”
“What are you doing sleeping in the car?” Sam asks concerned.
“Because it's comfortable?” Dean tries, not very convincing. This close, it's when he notices Sam's dark circles under his eyes. All this time Dean has stayed on the sofa trying to allow Sam to rest, and never went through his mind that Sam might be too worried about his situation to actually sleep. “Dude, you look like shit.” He says, because he doesn't want to ask if his suspicions are true, he already knows the answer Sam is going to give him, and he feels guilty about Sam dealing with all of this too.
Sam chuckles, shaking his head. “Look who's talking.” He says, avoiding Dean's knowing look. “So, are you going to stay there the whole day, or are you planning to go to work today?” He says before Dean gets the change to say anything else.
Dean stares at him. “What do you mean the whole day? It's barely—what time is it?”
“Seven in the morning.”
“Seven in the—holy shit.”
“What?”
“I slept the whole night.” Dean whispers, surprised. He straightens up, his back and neck protesting the movement, and yep that right there tells him he has spent too long sitting on the car. He also feels a little more awake and a bit rested, which is a plus.
Sam smiles, relieved. “Well, that's great. I was wondering when it would finally end.”
“No, Sammy, you don't get it. The baby was still moving a lot when I sat here. But he didn't wake me up during the night.”
“Okay...what exactly are you saying?”
“I think I found my solution.”
Sam just gives him a confused frown.
~*~
The next night, instead of letting Sam go to bed and both staying up all night watching stuff or reading, Dean drags Sam to the car. He does exactly what he did the night before because, if his theory is right, then they'll be back to sleeping at night again— finally.
“I don't get why we're sitting here,” Sam says, tapping his fingers on the wheel.
Dean takes one of Sam's hands and places it on his belly, right under where the baby is moving up a storm. “Watch this.”
Dean presses the cassette inside the radio and rock starts playing instantly. Sam, to his credit, just stays quiet and waits to see what Dean’s trying to show him.
It takes just five minutes before the movements inside his belly start to slow down. Sam looks down at his hand, then back at Dean, opens his mouth to say something, but whatever it was gets stuck because the baby stops moving altogether.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Sam gapes.
Dean grins. “Takes after his own father,” Dean says proudly. “Phew, good thing it took after me because your music taste is lousy.”
“You're telling me the baby likes rock music, and that makes him fall asleep?”
Dean's now trying not to laugh at Sam's offended face. “You look like someone pooped on one of your precious books.”
“Shut up.”
“Wish I had thought of this a month ago,” Dean says yawning.
“So, now what? You can’t just sleep in the car all the time.”
He's right of course; it would be hell for Dean's back and neck.
“What?” Dean asks, at Sam’s inquisitive look.
“Would you let me put all your music on my iPod, so we can play it for the baby in bed?”
Dean stops himself from protesting using such an abomination to play his tunes because this is for the baby. “Sounds like a plan.”
“Good. I'll get to that.” Sam says climbing out of the car.
“Right now?”
“Yup. Gotta make sure you sleep tonight too.”
“That will take you forever, man.”
“Just gonna get a few for tonight, finish it tomorrow,” Sam explains, walking to the passenger side of the car. “C'mon, let’s get back inside.” He offers a hand that Dean, over his pride, takes to help himself out of the car.
“You know, I'm hoping the baby takes after you with the brains.”
“You're smart too, Dean.”
Dean waves his hand in the air. “You know what I mean.”
Sam shakes his head and smirks but doesn't point out Dean's deflection on the compliment. “Whatever happens, he will be very loved.”
“Even if he likes loud music?”
Sam chuckles and gives Dean a soft kiss. “Even then.”
“Damn right.”
~*~
That night, Sam puts the headphones playing the rock music over Dean's belly while they lie in bed. The baby falls asleep pretty quickly, and for the first time in weeks, Dean is able to sleep through the whole night snuggled next to Sam.
~Fin~