Chapter Text
“Jason?” You asked softly. It was a hot summer day, and you two were at a park, lazily reading in your special spot, as the two of you had called it when you discovered it long ago, hiding from two bullies in your class that had attempted to follow you at the time. You had stopped reading a while ago now, opting to lay on your back and watch the clouds while he finished up the current chapter he was absorbed in. “Hmm?” He hummed out, setting his book aside to look at you. His bright blue eyes could rival the sky right now, and you blushed slightly as he lazily wrapped an arm around you, laying down by you with his head against yours. Dating Jason Todd had so many perks, he was so sweet and bright. He had always been such a gentleman, walking you home and sharing anything and everything with you. Now, he’d just have his butler pick you up and drop you off after school, since he’d been adopted by Bruce Wayne. You two loved sharing the cookies Alfred would make for him during lunch during school, or in your room while studying when your parents would go out for the evening.
Jason’s eyes were closed, he looked so peaceful in the moment. But your eyes drifted to his eyebags, and the ugly, blue bruise that was just barely visible under his sleeve. The only downside of dating Jason Todd - he was Robin now and you had to deal with him getting hurt every night. Coming into class late or tired because 'he had stayed up watching a movie' or 'my dad has me learning karate! His excuses worked wonderfully with the teachers and students who asked, but he shouldn't have to use them.
“I worry about you, a lot. Because of your…night job.” You muttered softly. He opened his eyes to look at you, your foreheads still touching. Jason tried to comfort you with a small kiss, pressing his lips against the side of your nose. “ It’s ok, don’t. I always come back. Bruce and I are a good team!” He said cheekily, laughing off your worries. You couldn’t help but purse your lips, despite his smile. “I know, but…I’m scared.” You whispered out, glancing back at the bruise and softly touching it, he tried to hide the pain, but you felt him twitch slightly. “I’m glad you’re happy and that you found a good dad but…the thought of you taking on villains like-like Poison Ivy and Clayface and the Joker…” You trailed off, frowning. Just last week, you had to watch on the TV as he was thrown a good 10 feet by Clayface. The week before, Ivy and her vines were thrashing him around like nothing. The latest threat had been from the Joker, cackling and running around Gotham again, one of his goons had gotten a good hit in on Jason.
He stayed quiet for a good minute, his eyes closed again. His lips were pulled into a small, sad frown. “I’m sorry.” You whispered softly. Jason didn’t usually like when you brought up the idea of him quitting his vigilante life, the patrols and the fights were exhilarating for him apparently. He had always lived for that...the rush, the adrenaline, the victory. You vaguely recalled a time when he had to take on two men who had tried scamming him out of money for a tire he had stolen for them. He had won a lot of his fights back then as just Jason too. The only stakes back then were a beating, or maybe getting a knife or gun flashed at you.
Now, he's facing almost certain death every night. Surely he could understand where you were coming from... Jason sighed, keeping his eyes closed. After a few minutes, he finally spoke. “You know how i feel about being him. It’s magic, I'm sorry baby but, I can’t…give that up. I'm sorry. It really gives me a purpose, I..I feel like I belong, for once in my life. I’m really helping people in Gotham, I'm making a difference. Part of the reason I do this is for you!” He insisted, moving the hand that was on your waist to hold your hand. “For you, I’ll make you a promise. I promise to always come back to you." He said quietly, a tender look in his eyes. I sighed.
“Pinky promise?” You whispered as you held your pinky out, waiting for him to follow suit. “Pinky promise.” He said with a smile on his face, linking your pinkies together. You leaned forward to press a soft kiss on his lips that he returned, before letting out a content sigh as he wrapped his arms around you. “Nothing will ever keep me from you.” He mumbled into your hair. “Not Ivy or Penguin or Joker. I’ll beat up all of them and toss them back into Arkham Asylum before I come back to you, victorious!” He said, moving his face into your neck to tickle you by blowing a raspberry, pulling away to laugh as you shrieked and giggled. “That’s not fair!” You complained, but you couldn’t help but laugh too, your eyes shining. You felt so much better. Nothing could ever happen to Jason. "I'll wait for you every time, my knight in shining armor." You said softly, returning his smile this time. "Or should I say spandex?" You giggled again at his playful scowl.
What should you worry about? If anything, your boyfriend is better off as Robin. He had survived the streets of Gotham for so long, through cold winters and summers hotter than this one. You remembered the multiple times you'd have to sneak him in to warm him up and feed him during the below zero temperatures of December, or give him a safe place to crash if there were too many people after him. Or when CPS put him in another abusive foster home. Now he was Bruce’s son, helping others as Robin. Getting three meals a day and desserts and snacks. He had a brother, and a warm, big room. His dad was the richest man in Gotham and if Jason asked for something, it would be his.
He made sure you were safe, protecting you at school and as Robin, on patrols. He had always been a natural fighter and he was a survivor. You felt so silly, worrying over nothing. Jason had told you repeatedly about the Batman’s extensive training, the practice runs and tests and everything else. What could go wrong? Jason had told you all about the Batman's numerous plans, 'excessive' he had said once. Surely, Batman would account for even the tiniest thing. You pressed a soft kiss against his cheek, Jason always knew how to comfort you. “I love you Jay.” You said quietly. “I love you too, pretty girl.” He said back, caressing your hair.
The two of you stayed like that for what felt like hours, chatting about whatever came to mind. All afternoon long, until the air got colder and the sky was turning a deep orange. You both stayed in your spot, holding hands and watching the sun set. Once it dipped below the horizon, he stood up. “Come on, let me get you home before it gets too dark.” Jason said, as he tugged you up and swatted some dirt off of your shirt, you couldn’t help but smile. Once he had Alfred drop you off home and you were safely in your bed, you prayed there would be more days like this one in your future together.
You slept just a few hours until you woke up to the soft tapping at the window that meant Jason had dropped by as Robin to visit you. Smiling, you quickly got up, and opened it for him to come in. He hopped in, and had spent the night whispering excitedly about this and that, showing you a fighting maneuver every now and then. When 2am came by, he pressed a soft kiss against your lips, making sure you were safely tucked into bed before leaving, whispering out a final 'I love you."
2 months later
You stood at his grave with red eyes and a red nose, sniffling. How foolish you had been, thinking that being Robin had made him invincible. You should’ve tried harder to convince him to stop being Robin, or to at least wait for Bruce before heading to Ethiopia. Then he probably wouldn’t have died. "I'll be okay, pretty girl, remember our promise." He had said, pressing a chaste kiss against your lips before hopping out your window, promising to call you as soon as he found his mother. He had been so excited at the opportunity of having a mother again...who were you to stop him? That had been just a week ago. You zoned out for Bruce’s eulogy, for his adopted brother’s speech, and when Bruce quietly asked if you wanted to say anything in his honor, you shook your head no.
Your moments and memories of Jason would stay yours. The conversations, laughter, intimacy, your spot in the park - all yours. You would share nothing with these high-class idiots that were clearly only there to suck up to Bruce, nothing with the man that had been too late to prevent Jason’s death. You would never forgive Bruce for this. Never. You stayed in your spot, waiting for the casket to be buried. It wasn’t an open funeral because he had been blown to bits in Ethiopia. You couldn’t help but wonder why the Joker was still alive. The man should be dead. Surely, Bruce could have assured that, if nothing else. But no, his moral code wouldn't allow for him to do so. Even though the psychotic clown had gone to town beating your boyfriend until he was half-dead before blowing him up.
Slowly, people started leaving, but you stayed. You payed no mind to the few people that had remained, including Bruce. You walked past him shooting him a look filled with so much hate and venom that he didn’t attempt to talk to you the whole time you were there. Your poor, beloved Jason, 6 feet below the ground now. He had only been 15. His birthday had been just two weeks away. You had already gone shopping for a gift, that would now remain unopened on a shelf in your closet. It had been a limited edition classic he had wanted. You had saved for weeks to buy that book because Jason had rambled on and on about how he had wanted his own personal copy to annotate. Now, it'd gather dust, unopened, along with the letter you had written him. You stayed there until the sky grew dark, looking at his tombstone and reminiscing. When you finally turned around to leave, you were surprised to see Dick Grayson still there. He was the only one still there. You hadn't even realized it had gotten so late.
He looked just as tired as you, just as pained as you. You briefly remembered how Jason had told you Dick and Bruce weren’t getting along as well as they used to, how he was almost never at the manor anymore. How Dick Grayson had given him a hard time but they had just started getting along and he had promised Jason to take him out to see the circus he had grown up in. None of that mattered now. Their budding relationship had been cut short, just as your relationship with Jason had. You didn't know what to do, staring at Dick from a distance as he stared back. Finally, he called out to you. “Come on. I’ll walk you home.” Dick said with a small, tight smile. “He...he told me he always used to walk you home once. Gotta make sure you get home safe.” You stayed there for a moment longer before you nodded stiffly, walking to him. You shot one last look at the grave of your boyfriend before leaving, your eyes watering again.
The two of you walked side by side in silence, all the way until you guys reached your house. You appreciated how Dick didn't try to chat to you about any meaningless topics for the sake of filling the quiet, at least. The walk was a long one, but finally, you reached your house. “Thank you.” You whispered out, breaking the silence. He nodded, and gave you his number. “For anything you might ever need.” He had said at the time. “It’s what he would have wanted.” He repeated, before wishing you goodbye. "'Night," he mumbled to you before he walked off, shooting you one last small, pained smile as he passed you.
You had done a good job of pushing all your grief and despair down for a while after that. Almost a month with nothing, with no reason to use Dick Grayson's number. You were beginning to wonder if you should just delete the contact you had made for him that night when you got home after school one day. You did your homework, and took a shower, heading out of the bathroom in a robe. You sighed, annoyed as you dug deep into one of the drawers you almost never used, looking for a good pair of shorts and shirt to sleep in. This is what you get for putting off laundry for the third time in a row, you'd have to remind yourself to throw a load in tomorrow. You reached for something in the very back that felt comfy, as you pulled it out, you stiffened up. It was of Jason's old shirts that was still here, one he had left 'in case you ever miss me' he had said to you, laughing as he shrugged it off.
It had been a warm spring night, but despite the humidity, he still cuddled with you. The two of you had giggled and complained in the morning about who had sweated more, who snored louder and how your skin had stuck to his, but you would give anything to have that back now. You shakily changed out of your robe before finally breaking down, sobbing as you slid onto your floor because you had sniffed it and still smelled like him. Clutching the shirt to your chest, you finally dialed Dick Grayson’s number, trying to tell him what had happened. While you knew most of it was ineligible, you greatly appreciated him for attempting to listen. He even went the extra mile.
“I’ll be there in 10 minutes."