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"Etho," Bdubs says. "Should- should we get married?"
Etho blinks and sits up, moving his head out of Bdubs's lap. "What?"
"Well- hey, you didn't have to move," Bdubs pouts. "I mean, should we get married?"
"Why?" Etho says. He's not wearing his mask right now, and even with it on, he manages to expressive. He's obviously confused, which is weird, because Bdubs sort of thought...
"Well, you know," Bdubs laughs a little awkwardly as he rubs the back of his head. "It's- I mean, we're- I don't know! It just seems like something we could do."
It's hard to explain. He loves Etho. It's a deep, deep love, too, because Bdubs loves often and easily, and that's fine, he loves loving people, but Etho- Etho and him have been entangled with each other for so long that it's different. Bdubs knows Etho, and Etho knows Bdubs. Bdubs would do anything for a lot of people. He loves it. He loves them. But Etho...
Well. He's special. And maybe that kind of connection requires some kind of... marking. Celebration.
"I just kind of thought," Etho says. "That- um- marriage was for people in love."
"Bwuh- huh?" Bdubs says. "But- isn't that us?"
"What?" says Etho. "Um, no, I didn't think so..."
"Well, I do love you, you know," Bdubs says. "I wouldn't have asked if I didn't."
Etho looks away, and a horrible dread rises up from Bdubs's stomach.
"But... um, you love me, right?" Bdubs says, voice wavering.
"Well, yeah!" Etho says. "Just- I mean, not in the get-married way."
"Oh," says Bdubs. "Oh! Well, that's fine. Okay!"
"Okay?" Etho chuckles, shoulders relaxing slightly with relief.
"Yeah, I was scared you were going to be like- oh, you've been hanging out with me for all this time, and you hated me for all of it, and were just too shy to say so. Wow!" Bdubs laughs. "So who would you want to get married to?"
"Um," says Etho. "I don't really know. No one, maybe."
"Oh!" Bdubs says. "So you- so if you're not saving your marriage for anyone, can we still do it?"
"Huh?" says Etho. "Oh, yeah, sure."
"Hey! You were so worked up about it earlier, and now you're just giving in!?" Bdubs says. "What's with that?"
"Huh? Well, if you're fine marrying someone who doesn't return your feelings, I'm fine with it," Etho says. "I like the idea of wedding presents."
"No, but-" Bdubs breaks off and grabs his face in his hands, frustrated. "It's not the hearts and kissing and stuff, because like, I wanna do that to you, but I don't care if you want to do it to me. It's just- you know me, yeah? And I know you. And that's the thing that I care about. That's the reciprocation."
"Oh," says Etho. He smiles. "Oh, yeah. Yeah, I love you. Like that."
"So we can get married?" Bdubs says hopefully.
"Of course," Etho says. "Make sure you require people to bring gifts on the invitation, though."
"You got it," Bdubs promises him.
- - -
Neither of them wear white. Etho, who has about 20 copies of the same outfit and wears nothing else, wears the same outfit he always wears. Bdubs isn't really surprised.
Bdubs borrows one of Cleo's dresses and looks absolutely fabulous in it, even if he does keep tripping over the hem. They pinned it up for him, but it's still far too long- NOT because he's short. Because Cleo's a giant.
It's totally worth it though.
Scar officiates, which means that there's a 75% chance they aren't actually legally married, but Bdubs isn't too bothered about it. This is more for sentiment than anything else. Actually, it's probably a good thing if his finances aren't tied to Etho's, since he commits tax fraud. Etho doesn't take off his mask when they kiss, which kind of sucks, but is also par for the course. Joel monologues loudly to anyone who will listen about the deep bond he and Etho share.
"Congrats," Grian says, grinning like a shark as he downs what has to be his 12th glass of punch, seemingly unaffected by it. "You've got a nice hustle going on here."
"You-! You and Scar and Mumbo did the same thing last season!" Bdubs protests.
"Yeah, but we ended up meaning it," Grian says dismissively. "This? Well, I mean, maybe you mean something by it. Etho doesn't."
Bdubs chokes on his own cup of punch.
Back in the games-
Well. Bdubs tries to keep his lives separate, but it's hard when some of his closest allies don't even bother pretending like it never happened. Etho and Cleo are always rubbing it in his face, the jerks!
The point being- he doesn't like thinking about it, but back in the games, when Bdubs had been red for the umpteenth time and not quite desperate, he had thought-
"He loves me."
And everyone had laughed.
Because the thing was- it had been a little bit of a lie. Playing up the role. Leaning into the blind faith that had carried him that far. But the faith had been there, and it had gotten him that far, so-
Etho doesn't love easily, and when he does, it's a choice, fragile and thin-spun from familiarity and the thrill of trying to stay. It's a little different from the love Bdubs feels- even the platonic kind.
And. The thing had been. That Etho hadn't chosen to love him then. Or he had, but it hadn't been enough, or maybe it was never love at all and it was just- the knowledge that Bdubs was Bdubs and Etho was Etho and that they'd always find each other.
Etho plays into the roles he's given, just like Bdubs. He's a little more subtle about it, sure, but Joel decides that they're soulmates and Etho plays along. Gem decides that he's washed up and he plays along. Cleo decides that they're divorced and he plays along.
Bdubs says, he loves me, and Etho lets him die.
That's how he knows there's something more than Etho just playing along there.
"Well, you think what you want," Bdubs says dismissively, and wanders off. It doesn't matter if Grian knows that he and Etho have stumbled into something a little different than love.
"Bdubs!" Etho shouts, waving him over to the gift table. "Look what Skizz got us!"
"A crockpot?" Bdubs squints.
"An essential for any newly-wed couple," Skizz says sagely.
"Well, if you say so," Bdubs says, and sits down next to Etho to help him unwrap presents.