Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

When Kai Holman stepped foot into the hangar, he could feel the anxiety in the back of his neck. His eyes flicked across the area, scanning it. He remembered Jesse’s words from the last time he’d seen Boom Boom, maybe talk less, and cringed as he thought back. He didn’t know why he got so damned flustered around the man. Truly, he just wanted the explosive expert to like him, he wasn’t that bad, right? But every time he was around the other man, he fumbled his speech, said things he didn’t mean, his intentions warped in the thoughts of fuck it’s Boom Boom, and Kai wasn’t sure how to place those thoughts really.

Finally, he spotted a familiar looking pair of boots and trousers peeking out from underneath the van from the crime scene.

“Hey, Boom Boom,” he led, making sure his steps carried him with confidence he wasn’t necessarily feeling.

“Got your text. You said you found something?” What he wasn’t expecting was for the person to roll out to not be Boom Boom.

“Look like Boom Boom to you?” Bam Bam looked him at him with that inscrutable face of hers and Kai wasn’t sure what he’d done to deserve this.

“Hey, Bam Bam, I’m sorry,” he started but she interrupted him.

“I don’t mistake you for Boone or Tennant?” The way she held herself, hands on her hips and the slight shake to her head as she said it, had Kai’s mind reeling.

“I- I didn’t see you,” he knew he’d fumbled it. Took too long to reply by a split second, could feel the blood gathering in his face to give him a rosy flush. Fuck.

“Even though I’m standing right in front of you?” Kai didn’t know how to read Bam Bam’s stoic face; he made an unintelligible noise and turned with a sigh of relief at the familiar voice behind him.

“What’s going on?” Boom Boom had come out of the break room, a coffee mug clasped in one hand and Kai was glad he was there for all of two seconds before –

“Holman thinks we look alike.” Bam Bam’s voice rang out and Kai whirled back to look at her with wide eyes, because what? He could feel the flush rising up his neck, flustered.

“I really don’t,” he tried. “I don’t.”

“Well, take that as a compliment and we can move on.” Kai refused to acknowledge how the man’s assertiveness was making his stomach twist in knots and how Bam Bam’s impassive face was making his ears hot. He’d thought interacting with the two of them separately was bad but together… he wasn’t sure he was going to survive this one.

“Yes please, thank you.” He pulled himself together, hands floundering still but he was proud of his voice for not wobbling.

“I got your text to say you had a lead?” He turned to Boom Boom, hated the hopeful twist to his words, and the way he could feel both of their gazes on him.

“Yeah, been examining the device that set off the elephant toothpaste.” Boom Boom turned and Kai let out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding before moving to follow.

“It’s pretty impressive actually,” Bam Bam’s voice rang out behind him, maybe slightly closer than he’d expected but Kai did his best to stay focused on the task at hand. The van, the explosives, the elephant toothpaste; he could do this.

“Small explosives set off by a remote detonator, probably from a cell phone.” Boom Boom continued as he stopped in front of the reconstruction of it.

“Like a bomb?” Kai was relieved his voice sounded calmer now, this he could do. Work talk. Bombs were safe territory.

“Yeah,” Bam Bam continued. “Only this one isn’t dangerous.”

“It’s strong enough to break the bottom of some tubes and a lot of chemicals mix.” Trying to ignore the way both forensic experts dropped into a crouch, Kai held up his phone to take pictures of the device. (Also ignoring the way both Boom Boom and Bam Bam were in the picture.)

“Um,” Kai dropped down into a squat as well. “How exactly is this stuff made?” He cursed himself a bit for not knowing when Bam Bam gave Boom Boom what could only be described as a look, and Boom Boom just cocked his head and raised his brows in a way that said, ‘he’s an idiot’.

“Skipped that day of seventh grade science, huh?” The sting of the words was only slightly lessened by the almost fond (?) exasperation in Boom Boom’s tone of voice? But Kai could’ve imagined that… He had to look away from them both though, bile rising in his throat at the thought that he’d fucked up again. Talk less, Jesse had said. Fuck why couldn’t he just stay quiet.

“It’s pretty easy.” Bam Bam broke the silence and gave Kai something else to focus on.

“Concentrated hydrogen peroxide, potassium chloride as a catalyst.”

“You know what a catalyst is, right?” It was impossible for Kai to not look at him; the man was magnetic even when he was teasing Kai.

“Makes it go boom?” He’d opted for maybe lightening the mood a bit, but there was barely a reaction from the two people in front of him. Kai winced inwardly.

“Close enough.” Boom Boom muttered. Kai couldn’t keep his eyes off him, gaze darting back to the man in search of – something, Kai wasn’t sure he wanted to admit it to himself yet – even as Bam Bam continued her explanation.

“Then you add soap, food colouring and baking yeast.”

“Lots of baking yeast,” Boom Boom took over; Kai marvelled at the way they were so in sync.

“In this case, I did some digging. Turns out the commissary here sold over a hundred bags of it last week.” Boom Boom pushed up out of the squat and walked over to a computer.

“To one person?” Kai frowned, following. Why hadn’t that been flagged? Nobody needed that much baking yeast for actual baking.

Boom Boom pulled up a picture of a man – Morrison, Bill, looked to be mid-40s.

“Lieutenant Commander William Morrison.” Boom Boom spoke. “Navy pilot. Lives on base.” Kai was ecstatic – finally a lead, a name and they lived on base. A break in the case. He needed to get back to the others and update them.

“This is great,” he muttered, mind already on the car outside and the drive back to the office. Could they intercept the man today? He started walking towards the exit.

“Thank you, Boom Boom.” See, Jesse? He could talk less. And he hadn’t floundered at the end there; Kai was going to call that a success.

“I’m Boom Boom, she’s Bam Bam.” Boom Boom’s voice rang out, making Kai falter and turn back towards the two.

“Isn’t… that what I said?” He queried, genuinely confused. He was sure he’d said Boom Boom. Their faces gave nothing away.

“I don’t know, is it?” Bam Bam’s voice sounded kind of teasing, but Kai couldn’t get a proper read on her. Both of their expressions were as stoic and emotionless as always. Fuck, he could feel blood rushing to his face in a blush again.

“U-um,” he stuttered, and fuck he’d been so close to making it out without stuttering and making a fool of himself. Bam Bam crossed her arms; Boom Boom was motionless and Kai floundered.

“Great work,” he started, proud that his voice sounded at least mildly stable; he sure wasn’t feeling it. “Both of you, thank you.” He took a step backwards.

“Sorry.” The word was out of his mouth before he could stop it and he cursed himself for it, but their emotionless faces were haunting him as he made a run for it. Fuck, he could never keep his fucking cool around them.

***

Boom Boom smirked as he watched Kai walk away. Bam Bam nudged him.

“He’s fun to mess with.” Boom Boom smirked at her words, gaze tracking Kai’s retreat.

“Always brings sunshine to my day.” He responded before turning to her; their grins mirrored on each other’s faces as they turned back to the van behind them. Bam Bam getting ready to get underneath the vehicle again, Boom Boom turned again, watching the door fall shut.

“Did I tell you about how we found the elephant toothpaste?” He mused and heard Bam Bam chuckle from underneath the van.

“No, but I can already tell I wanna know.” Boom Boom chuckled. “After that RushCut video….” Boom Boom startled.

“RushCut…?” His confusion startled a laugh out of Bam Bam and she emerged from underneath the van again.

“You haven’t seen it?” When Boom Boom shook his head, she reached for her phone and tapped away at it before twisting it so Boom Boom could see. He cursed when he saw Boone, Holman and himself in front of the damn van, jumping back at the sound of the explosion and then stare in horror as the elephant toothpaste ruined every bit of evidence he’d had – and then it looped.

“Okay, okay, make it stop.” He looked away from the phone even as Bam Bam’s laughter filled his ears.

“So tell me more about this boy.” Her voice was steady, but he could see the spark of interest in her eyes. Boom Boom was no stranger to his attraction to Kai and Bam Bam but seeing her interested in the NCIS agent was… something in his stomach tightened and released, but he buried it down deep for now.

“Well, when I showed up, he was excited like a puppy,” He started and went on to recount in great detail how flustered Kai had been throughout the entire outing. The interest in Bam Bam’s eyes only seemed to grow as they giggled over Kai’s reactions; Boom Boom felt something warm unfurl in his chest.

***

It was a kid. Kai shook his head as he dropped his keys in the hallway and toed his shoes off. Just needed some attention. He hung up his jacket and let himself drop onto the sofa like dead weight, staring at the ceiling until he heard his phone vibrate with a message. He frowned as he unlocked the screen and then felt his eyes grow wide.

Boom Boom [21:24] Morrison ok?

Kai stared at the message for a while; the words made sense but the sentence didn’t. Why was Boom Boom texting him when it wasn’t about a case? Sure, Kai didn’t think the man actually hated him but… He typed out a quick reply, sent it and startled, surprised, when the read mark appeared immediately and Boom Boom started typing. Kai felt his eyes grow even wider at the responses.

You [21:30] Yeah, in hospital but we managed to help the kid.

Boom Boom [21:31] Good to hear.

Boom Boom [21:31] How are you holding up?

Kai stared at the screen some more. Boom Boom had… initiated more conversation? There was a fluttering, warm something gathering in the pit of his stomach, but he tried to ignore it.

You [21:33] I’m alright.

You [21:33] Always hard when it’s kids, yk?

Boom Boom [21:34] ‘s why I prefer looking at the aftermath.

Boom Boom [21:34] dunno how you do it

Kai wasn’t sure how to respond to that, but he also really didn’t want the conversation to end. In the end he didn’t have to worry.

Boom Boom [21:35] heard you saved the kid from a fighting dog

Boom Boom [21:35] real hero, you, huh?

You [21:37] I’m no hero

You [21:37] wasn’t really thinking when I did it 😅

Boom Boom [21:37] that doesn’t necessarily fill me with confidence, sweetheart

Kai felt his heart miss a beat at the endearment, his hands felt sweaty, his pulse was racing, and – oh God, oh no. He knew that feeling. He hadn’t felt it in a while, and he really wasn’t expecting it but… there was no mistaking it and Kai wasn’t sure what to do with it. He settled for steering the conversation in a different direction.

You [21:40] how did you even hear about all this?

Boom Boom [21:42] met the kid

Boom Boom [21:42] doing his community service hours with B and I

Boom Boom [21:43] told us all about the heroic agent who got him out of the dog cage

Kai laughed despite himself.

You [21:43] he’s smart

You [21:43] glad to hear he’s gonna use those smarts to fight crimes, not commit them

Putting his phone down, Kai ran a hand over his face. What was he doing? He couldn’t shake the knowledge that he’d somehow, somewhere developed a crush (a Crush!) on Boom Boom of all people. It explained the flustered state he was reduced to when around the other man and why he actually looked forward to trips to forensic… Fuck, he had to stop thinking about it – and him. He pushed up and made his way to the kitchen to eat a quick dinner before heading to bed. Halfway through toasting some bread, his phone vibrated again. He considered not looking at it but then it vibrated again so he sighed and pulled it out of his pocket. Two messages; two chats.

Boom Boom [22:01] yea I’m sure he’ll be a pain to have around

Bam Bam [22:02] how did elephant toothpaste boy end up in a dog fighting cage?

Kai stared at his phone for what felt like hours. The message from Boom Boom he’d expected but Bam Bam? He’d interacted with her even less than Boom Boom outside of work. Sure, he wanted to, but he could never find a reason to… now though… He scratched the back of his neck, unsure of how to proceed. He pulled up the chat with Boom Boom first.

You [22:06] he’s a good kid !

You [22:06] be nice

With some more hesitation he pulled up the chat with Bam Bam. He scanned the message again before responding.

You [22:08] a sense of justice ig

You [22:08] you and boom boom plan this? 😂

There was a pause before an entirely new text thread appeared on his phone. He almost dropped it. Bam Bam had created a group chat – with Boom Boom and himself. It taunted him even as a message was sent into said chat and he found his fingers itching to open it, his heart was jackrabbiting in his chest like it was trying to escape. Another message vibrated the phone in his hand and he gave in.

BBsquared + Kai

Bam Bam [22:10] Seeing as we’re all talking about the same thing anyway 🤷‍♀️

Boom Boom [22:11] was this really necessary?

Boom Boom [22:11] I have too many threads in my phone already

Bam Bam [22:12] stop whining

Bam Bam [22:12] this’ll be fun, right Holman?

You [22:13] sure?

You [22:13] you can update me on the kid ig?

Boom Boom [22:15] sure we’ll do that

Bam Bam [22:15] grew attached, did ya?

You [22:15] yea

You [22:15] he was just tryna do something good

You [22:16] (with the dogs that is)

You [22:16] the other things were definitely for attention

Bam Bam [22:17] you talk too much even over text

Boom Boom [22:17] shh, he’ll stop if you tell him

Boom Boom [22:17] and how do we tease him if he does that?

Bam Bam [22:18] fair point

You [22:18] give me one reason to not just leave this chat

Bam Bam [22:19] we’re delightful?

Boom Boom [22:19] yk this is the coolest chat you’re in

You [22:20] …

Bam Bam [22:20] you know we’re right 😘

You [22:21] yea yea sure

You [22:22] as delightful as this is, I haven’t eaten yet and I need sleep

Bam Bam [22:23] go get your beauty sleep

Boom Boom [22:23] night Holman – sweet dreams

Kai pinched the bridge of his nose. Sweet dreams? Sweet dreams?

You [22:24] yea you too

He’d hit send before he could regret it and put the phone down on the countertop face down.

“Not thinking about it,” he muttered to himself as he bit into the bread, decidedly not thinking about certain NCIS agents.

***

BBsquared + Kai

Tuesday

Boom Boom [07:27] he’s insufferable

Bam Bam [07:31] I don’t know who’s more pathetic

Bam Bam [07:31] boom boom or the boy

Kai grinned down at his phone, about to type out a response when he heard the clearing of a throat next to him.

“Who’re you texting?” Lucy was peering at his phone screen, he wasn’t fast enough to lock it and her eyes widened, clearly having seen the names in the chat.

“Boom Boom and Bam Bam? You’re in a group chat?” Before Kai could even say anything, she barrelled on.

“And you respond? Do you know how long it’s been since you’ve sent anything in our squad group chat? Or the one you’re in with Ernie and me?”

“Look, I…” He had to take a minute to think it over; he was pretty sure he had those group chats muted because there were just too many messages sometimes…

“Wait, wait, wait,” Lucy ignored his attempt at a response as she whirled on him. “You were smiling. At your phone. While texting Boom Boom and Bam Bam. Do you-?” Kai shushed her, eyes filled with panic.

“Please, oh God, not here?” Kai grabbed her wrist and dragged her into one of the empty conference rooms. Where… she stood, arms crossed, looking up at him with an expectant look on her face and Kai? Kai wasn’t even really sure how to put his feelings into words. It had been a couple weeks since the creation of the group chat and the three of them texted pretty much every day. And not only about the kid. They talked about their days, sometimes Kai shared pictures of his food when he’d bothered to cook, sometimes they gossiped about other agents or work stories they knew were okay to talk about. Like the time Boom Boom came to diffuse a bomb Jesse was standing on while Kai had refused to leave (which he’d again called him out for and told him not to pull that kind of stunt again – it made that unspeakable warm feeling in Kai’s chest spread like wildfire). Truth be told, it wasn’t even just Boom Boom anymore. Kai had caught himself with the same fuzzy feeling in his stomach when Bam Bam had sent pictures of the sunrise on one of her early morning runs, or when she told them about that time, she had a call in about a possible explosive which had turned out to be a poorly planned proposal.

Kai turned to Lucy then; he didn’t know what his face was showing but Lucy immediately softened.

“Kai?” Her voice was hesitant; she took a step toward him.

“Luce, I just – don’t know what to do?” Suddenly he found he couldn’t not tell her.

“They’re both so – so. That doesn’t make any sense. I’m – is it… can you like more than one person at once?” Lucy stepped up to him, a soothing hand on his arm.

“I- of course, you can.” Kai searched her eyes for a lie almost desperately.

“It feels so selfish though, Luce.” He whispered. “And what if they don’t… I don’t know what to do.”

“What do you want to do?” Her question rang in his ears for a few moments while he tried to parse the meaning of it. What did he want?

‘I – I don’t know.” He hated how quiet his voice sounded and squared his shoulders to gain back some control.

“But it doesn’t matter, because nothing is ever going to-”

“Happen? Are you sure?” Lucy interrupted him.

“It can’t, Luce.” He let his eyes rest on the opposite wall, above Lucy’s head. “I… I like them both so much, it’s weird and I can’t do anything about it – shouldn’t do anything about it.” Lucy cocked her head in confusion at his statements.

“Didn’t take you for a coward, Holman.” He bristled at her raised eyebrow.

“I’m not a coward, Tara.” She laughed out loud at that.

“Yes, yes you are.” Kai went to speak but she interrupted him. “The worst they can do is say no, that they’re not into you.” Kai shook his head.

“But we’re like… friends? Now? I don’t… I can’t ruin that.” Lucy’s smile was tinged with sadness and understanding.

“I know, Kai.” She paused and let her hand rest on his arm again. “The question you have to ask yourself is if it’s worth it. How badly do you want this – them?” Kai groaned and buried his face in his palms.

“Also hold up a second, Bam Bam I get but Boom Boom? Since when are you swinging over on my side of the fence, Holman?” Lucy’s outburst managed to startle a laugh out of the man.

“You didn’t know?” He was genuinely surprised; he thought everyone had caught wind of it by now. “I’m bi, well biromantic.” He shrugged.

“Asexual, which… complicates things further probably. It always does.” He grimaced and winced thinking back on his past relationships. Either the person had told him upfront that they couldn’t get over the fact that he wasn’t sexually attracted to them and never would be, or it had started to eat away at them, showing ugly edges and sharp words which had always ultimately led to break ups.

“The news had not reached me yet,” Lucy gushed. “Thank you for telling me.” She leaned in and whispered conspiratorially:

“Glad we’re in this together, Holman.” Kai smiled and wrapped his arms around Lucy’s smaller frame. He was glad to have her; he couldn’t imagine having this kind of conversation with… literally any other person in his life.

***

After their conversation in the conference room, everything had gone back to normal except now Lucy teased him every time she caught Kai grinning or laughing at his phone or when either of the EODs were called in to help with a case. It was torture (it was perfect).

Boom Boom [14:05] at this point invite us over if you’re going to keep sending

    us pics of your food, Holman

Kai sputtered as he read the message. It was a Saturday and he had a rare two-days off so he’d actually cooked and just sent a picture of said meal to the group chat as he was wont to do and now… He suddenly couldn’t get the image of Saturdays with the two EODs out of his mind. Him cooking, Boom Boom reading a book quietly at the table, Bam Bam opposite him writing up a report, one of them grabbing a glass of water and dropping a kiss on his shoulder on the way, the other shortly after wrapping their arms around him from behind whispering a ‘Whatcha cookin’, Holman?’ in his ear…

Kai shook his head to physically banish the thoughts, they were his friends, he should not be having these thoughts about them. His phone pinged with another message, and he groaned loudly in helplessness.

Bam Bam [14:08] actually that is so true

Bam Bam [14:08] invite us over, Holman

Bam Bam [14:08] I’m starving

He couldn’t… or could he? Friends had dinners together. He’d cooked for Lucy and Kate before, and Tennant and Ernie… he could… He was typing and sending it before he could think properly.

You [14:09] lol sure

You [14:09] I’m still off tomorrow…

You [14:10] dinner?

He closed the text thread and locked his phone, a panicked gurgle forcing its way up his throat. Fuck. Twin tones emitted from his phone, and he looked down to see new messages from the group chat.

Bam Bam [14:10] hell yea, baby – 1800?

Boom Boom [14:10] 1800. See ya there, sweetheart.

“Shit,” Kai cursed, his fingers were numb, his legs prickling as if they were about to give way under his weight. “Shit, shit, shit.” He debated throwing his phone out of the window but then remembered he had one person whom he could call, one person who knew.

Quickly he unlocked the phone, valiantly ignoring the unread messages in the group chat now called “💣💣💥💥🔫” and clicked on Lucy’s contact. The panic in his mind was only cut by the sharp dial tone and his own heavy, too-fast breathing.

“Hel-“ but Lucy never got to finish her greeting.

“I invited them around for dinner?”  It came out as more of a question, but Kai could only hear his blood rushing in his ears, his pulse hammering through his entire body.

“Are you… asking or telling me?” Kai groaned and let himself drop to the floor, back against the cabinets.

“I invited them ‘round for dinner tomorrow. 1800.” He ran a hand over his face in defeat. “Well, that last part they agreed on.”

“Screenshots.” Lucy demanded and Kai’s hands shook as he opened the chat, took the screenshot, and sent it to Lucy. Her squeal almost deafened him.

“Baby!? Sweetheart!?” Kai winced; he’d almost grown used to the pet names because Boom Boom and Bam Bam loved to annoy him with them. He was sure they thrived on making him squirm, uncomfortable and red in the face whenever they called him baby, or sweetheart or honey. On one memorable occasion Bam Bam had called him princess in that deadpan tone of hers and Kai had almost fallen to his knees to beg her to stop right then and there. At the same time, they still called him Holman just as many times – the whiplash always left him dazed and flushed.

“That’s…” He trailed off but Lucy filled the silence.

“Is that… a normal occurrence? You do not seem as fazed as I thought you’d be?” Kai winced again and rubbed at his temples with his free hand, palm fanned across his face.

“It is?” Lucy was too good at reading between the lines, he decided and made a helpless sound in the back of his throat. “I’m sorry, let me repeat. You’re freaking out over inviting them over for dinner tomorrow, after they’ve been flirting with and teasing you for the past… two months and they’ve started calling you pet names?”

“Ah, well…” Kai grimaced. “When you put it like that…” Lucy made an exasperated noise at the other end of the line and Kai could hear Kate asking her a question.

“It’s nothing,” Lucy said clearly addressing her girlfriend. “Kai is being a gay mess.”

“Hey!” Kai exclaimed affronted but Lucy shushed him.

“No, you don’t get to talk right now.” She paused to take a deep breath. “Look, I know you’re panicking, but… Kai… honey. I really don’t think you have anything to worry about.” Kai made another frankly pathetic whining sound, but words were not forming on his tongue.

“What are you worried about?” Lucy’s voice was softer now, like someone trying to soothe a spooked animal; Kai floundered.

“Everything,” he breathed. “What if I fuck up? What if I say something that makes them uncomfortable and then I lose them both? What if they say something?” He paused; Lucy waited.

“I can’t lose them, but I want them so much and if I’m alone with them in my kitchen, I might lose my mind.”

“Oh Kai.” Lucy’s voice was tinged in so much sympathy, Kai could drown in it. He writhed, wanted to curl up on the floor and never get up, bury himself in his own ribcage and never be found. He wasn’t used to being vulnerable, least of all in front of, or with people.

“Look, there is no pressure.” Kai made a questioning sound and Lucy huffed a laugh. “I know it feels like there is, but there isn’t. The three of you are friends. If no one says anything then it’s a dinner between friends, nothing more, nothing less.”

“What if I – or they – say something?” Kai thought back to his immediate fucking domestic fantasy. “I can’t – I get so flustered around them, Luce.”

“Oh, honey, I know.” Now her tone was almost mocking, and Kai tried to be offended (he couldn’t).

“I think, genuinely, they enjoy making you flustered – you do get awfully cute when your cheeks go all red and you stumble over your words.” She giggled and Kai felt a little bit more murderous than pathetic for a second.

“Lucy…” He growled out.

“Sheesh, hold yer horses.” There was a rustling noise and then a door shutting in the background. “Look, Kai. Just go in with open eyes. You want them – I’m pretty certain they want you, too, for the record, even though you don’t believe me – and it’s not a bad thing to maybe let a little bit of that bleed through? Give them a hint that like you’re open to it?”

“Open to it…” Kai laughed bitterly. “More like fucking desperate.”

“You said it, not me.” He could hear the grin on her face. “But they won’t catch on unless you say or do something to clue them in.”

“I hate it when you’re right, Tara.” He groaned, hand gripping his hair in frustration.

“I usually am, Holman.” Kai fought the urge to stick his tongue out at the phone.

“Right, well… thank you for – calming me down.” He grumbled and Lucy made a happy noise of acknowledgment. “I gotta prep for the meal of doom tomorrow now.”

He could hear the laughter in Lucy’s voice again by the time they hung up and he was grateful for her. He could still feel the claws of something ugly and worried dug deep into his gut, but the panic was no longer choking him.

***

Sunday 1800 hours came quicker than he’d anticipated. He’d changed his clothes at least three times, the table was set, the food was ready, and he was pacing in the kitchen waiting for the two agents to show.

“Fuck, this was a bad idea.” He mumbled just as the shrill of his doorbell echoed through his flat. He took a deep breath before stalking through his flat, heart in his throat, lungs too small to breathe, and opened the door.

“Hey, Holman.” Bam Bam’s smirk was doing funny things to Kai’s insides and Boom Boom’s stoic face behind her wasn’t helping. (Rather it made those funny things twisty, and Kai was pretty sure he couldn’t breathe because his intestines were wrapped around his lungs.)

“Hi,” he breathed. “Come in.” The two stepped in as Kai took a step back, toeing off their shoes before Kai could say anything and he smiled to himself, his chest sticky warm with affection for the two people behind him.

“So, what have you cooked for us?” Kai hadn’t anticipated what effect having them in his space would have on him, and he wasn’t sure he was ready to unpack it now… or ever.

“Um, local fish with poke.” Kai led them into the kitchen, trying not to think about them scrutinising his private space. “It’s not much but…”

“If it tastes as good as it smells, sweetheart, then we will be very happy tonight.” They were the first words Boom Boom had spoken and they hit Kai harder than a punch to the solar plexus. “Also, we brought beer.” Kai laughed softly and gestured for them to sit.

“I’ll put them in the fridge.” He grabbed the six-pack off Boom Boom and hurried to the fridge. The cool air wafting towards him as he opened it was a welcome distraction and he could only hope that it didn’t mean that his skin was as red-hot flushed as it felt. It certainly did nothing to douse the warm feeling blossoming in his chest as he thought about the two people sitting at his table right now. He wasn’t sure he was going to survive this one… But he turned and faced the music like the trained soldier that he was. He reached for the food and brought it over to the set table.

“I, um, we tend to just share?” He grimaced at how uncertain he sounded, cleared his throat, and tried again. “So, help yourselves to the fish – it’s grilled Ahi – and there is more poke in the kitchen so don’t hold back.” He felt his mouth twist into a small smile as he watched both his guests’ eyes widen, taking in the food.

“This looks good, Holman.” Bam Bam spoke, voice level, not giving much away, but Kai felt the flush spread down his neck at the compliment.

“Agreed – didn’t think you had it in you.” Boom Boom smirked up at where Kai was still standing. Kai felt himself flounder before he huffed in mock-offense.

“You know my Pops owns a restaurant, right?” He said incredulously; Boom Boom shrugged, and Bam Bam made a surprised sound.

“Did not know that.” She mumbled. “Useful information…” She trailed off and Kai wasn’t sure what to make of the comment, so he let it go.

The rest of dinner was a relatively quiet affair. They ate, drank, and after the food was gone, they spoke of this and that. Kai felt himself relaxing with every passing minute, his nerves calming with every deadpan joke and tease from his two dinner guests. He was just glad he wasn’t stumbling over his words like he’d almost grown used to while in the presence of the two. Time flew and before Kai knew, Boom Boom had dipped out to grab ice cream and Kai found himself on the sofa with Bam Bam discussing films.

“Do you know that Boom Boom does not like romcoms?” Kai laughed at the incredulity in Bam Bam’s tone.

“Am I supposed to be surprised?” He grinned when Bam Bam nodded. “I’m honestly surprised you like them.” Bam Bam gasped dramatically, leaning in closer; Kai fumbled. Her eyes were so dark, open so wide, her skin was flawless and Kai found himself wanting to reach out; he sat on his hands.

“What, I don’t strike you as a romantic?” Her voice was no longer as deadpan as he was used to from work; the couple of beers they’d had with dinner making her a bit more loose tongued, a pretty flush in her cheeks. Kai couldn’t look away.

“Uh – I, well,” His tongue felt like it was too big for his mouth, his brain was fuzzy, he could smell her perfume; floral but kind of musky. “Action films.” He finally managed; Bam Bam let out a surprised laugh and leaned back. Kai could breathe again.

“Action films?” She giggled; Kai felt heat in his cheeks again. “I do enjoy a good Action film, I won’t lie, but romantic comedies are my favourites.”

“Why?” The word slipped past his lips before he could think better of it. Bam Bam looked up at the ceiling in thought before turning those intense eyes back on Kai. His breath caught as he waited for her answer.

“We see so much shit in the line of work, it’s an escape, isn’t it?” Bam Bam’s lips turned up in a wistful smile and Kai found himself nodding. “For a couple hours, everything is happy and rosy. Some minor anxieties but you know you’re guaranteed a happy ending.”

“Unlike real life.” Kai muttered.

“Unlike real life.” Bam Bam echoed, and Kai felt it ricochet in his chest. He let his eyes travel the room, suddenly unable to look at her. Something heavy and dark settled in the pit of his stomach, it twisted his intestines uncomfortably and he felt like he could throw up: happy endings were for movies not real life.

“Hey, Holman,” Bam Bam’s voice pulled him back; he smiled automatically but there was a crease between her brows that told him she didn’t quite buy it. “Where did you go just there?” She laughed quietly but it didn’t reach her eyes. Kai shook his head minutely and smiled reassuringly.

“It’s nothing, don’t worry about it,” Bam Bam went to say something, but Kai powered through. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to not spill everything if she asked again. “Which movie are we gonna make him watch then? Personally, I’m thinking Pretty in Pink?” The way her face lit up, made that fuzzy something unfurl in him again. It wrapped itself around his heart, winding around his ribs holding it close and Kai couldn’t fight it if he tried.

When Boom Boom got back with the ice cream, he found Kai and Bam Bam sitting on the floor in front of the tv, giggling. The sight made him freeze in the doorway. The two hadn’t noticed him yet which he was kind of glad for because he wasn’t sure what his face was doing. The warmth of affection warmed him from the inside and he could easily picture so many days like this: coming back from work or the store to see Bam Bam and Kai giggling over something, the smell of Kai’s cooking still in the air, Bam Bam waving him over to join in on their madness or simply to tease Holman some more to watch him get flustered, stumble over his words, and maybe finally find out where that blush ended…

“Boom Boom, grab spoons and get your ass over here.” He laughed as he was startled out of his musings, seeing the two other agents look back at him, matching mischievous smirks on their faces. He grumbled but moved through to the kitchen to find spoons, thinking to himself that while he adored a flustered, bumbling Kai, a quietly confident, smirking one was equally enticing.

“Top drawer to the right of the sink.” Kai stifled a laugh, watching Boom Boom startle and almost drop the bag of ice cream when he spoke. The man had taken ages to find spoons, so he’d taken it upon himself to help. (He was steadfastly ignoring the way his traitorous heart sped up at the sight of him in Kai’s kitchen and the way his insides twisted at the unguarded, low chuckle.)

“Thanks, sweetheart.” Kai felt his heart twist and let out a shuddered breath as Boom Boom turned away from him to grab the spoons.

“Get back here, losers, or I’m gonna start the film without you.” Kai chuckled at Bam Bam’s call, found himself locking eyes with an equally amused Boom Boom and was stunned by the casual domesticity of the moment. It wrapped around them like a soft blanket and Kai almost felt like he was drowning in it, the pull towards the other man inevitable like the tide, a wave ready to crash.

“Come on then, Holman. Let’s not keep our lady waiting.” Boom Boom’s smirk widened when they heard the annoyed, I heard that from the living room. Kai chuckled, at a loss for words and turned to follow Boom Boom out of the kitchen.

The Princess Bride was a classic and Kai soon found himself lost in the story. The three of them shared the ice cream Boom Boom had bought and drank the rest of the beer they’d brought. At some point around the time Buttercup and Westley reunite, Kai noticed how much the three of them had gravitated towards each other. He himself was seated reclined in one corner of the sofa, Boom Boom’s side pressed tightly against his own, thighs touching, one of his arms thrown over the back of the couch and Kai could feel the heated touch of his skin against the back of his neck. Bam Bam was stretched across the rest of the couch, back resting against Boom Boom’s side and chest, head resting comfortably on his shoulder. They looked so… good together. Kai felt an odd stab to his heart in a moment of clarity. Of course, they were… were they? They’d never mentioned being together, but the familiarity between them was so obvious and intimate. Kai had to look away, keeping his eyes on the screen stubbornly. The rest of them movie went by in a blur and he could only chime into the conversation afterwards because he’d seen the movie so many times before. The feeling that he was on the outside of something wouldn’t leave him, his stomach was faint with it, his fingers tingling. But then Boom Boom got up to use the restroom and Bam Bam shuffled up to him so naturally, stretching her legs and letting her back rest fully against Kai’s chest, head cradled in the crook of his neck. He could feel her hair on his jawline and swallowed a gasp when she reached for her phone, but her other hand came to rest on his knee, curled comfortably around his leg, fingertips skirting the inseam. He felt his face heat up, words died on his tongue, thoughts fled through his ears as white noise. She was saying something, but Kai was too focused on every part of their bodies touching to catch every word. He hummed agreement and then promptly lost every cognitive function as Bam Bam pushed up and away a bit only to twist her head, drop a quick peck on his cheek with a grin and resume her position.

“It’s gonna be so fun, Holman, don’t worry, we’ll bring snacks.” Kai was left wondering what he’d agreed to with a rumbling, twisting mass of fucking eels in his stomach, senses still hyperaware of every one of Bam Bam’s movements.

“Hey, BM,” she called to Boom Boom as he walked back into the room, Kai couldn’t see her face, but he could see Boom Boom’s. He was expecting something akin to a flash of jealousy or a similarly hard feeling but he was almost bowled over by the raw affection he could easily read on the man’s face when he saw the position Bam Bam and Kai were in.

“Our boy here agreed to weekly movie nights.” And – ah, that’s what he’d agreed to… and while the thought of having this for one night every week filled him with a strange melancholy, he also couldn’t help but smile shyly at Boom Boom, not sure what to say to express that he’d really rather prefer they wouldn’t leave again.

“Sounds delightful.” He said with a straight face and Kai almost had it under control but then he saw the minute smile curl at the man’s lips and the fondness in his gaze and he fumbled.

“Um, yes, I- you’re always welcome,” his eyes widened when the words registered. “Not always! I mean yes, door’s open if you need anything but um privacy – move nights. Yes. Those are good. Sundays – I’ll cook.” He wanted to bury his head in the sand, fucking hell, why couldn’t he keep his cool around them? There was a beat of silence before the two EODs laughed softly, and Bam Bam turned to look up at him with an expressionless face to say:

“You’re cute when you babble.” Kai felt his cheeks heat up immediately and his mouth drop open in what could only be described as a gape.

“Um,” he added intelligently but was saved by Boom Boom.

“As much fun as this is, and it is,” the reassurance only half-settled the nervous energy that had remerged in Kai’s body. “We gotta head; early start tomorrow.” Kai glanced at the clock and startled seeing it sitting at 2336 hours. He was not going to get enough sleep that night (if he was going to manage to sleep in the first place), a shudder went through him at the thought of the nightmares, but he was well-versed in hiding them, so instead he carefully dislodged Bam Bam and stood.

“Of course, yeah, you have to get back to your flats.” He took Bam Bam’s proffered hand to help her off the sofa and let his hand linger just a tad too long, gaining a slightly raised eyebrow from Bam Bam but she didn’t comment. In a way Kai was grateful, he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to handle that conversation right now, but he was equally uneasy at just letting the two of them leave just like that. He followed them to the entrance nonetheless, smiled when they complimented his food again and then Bam Bam reached up for a hug. Kai felt dangerously close to giving in when he wrapped his arms around her waist, her own looped around his neck and he was suddenly surrounded by her perfume gain and he never wanted it to end.

“Alright enough cute shit.” Boom Boom grumbled but that only had the effect that Bam Bam pulled him in as well and Kai found himself with one arm wrapped around Bam Bam, the other around Boom Boom, his hands curling around their waists. He swallowed harshly, remembered Lucy’s words, to give a hint at least, and so he let his hands linger, let his fingers flex to pull them both in a bit closer and smiled.

“Can’t wait for next week.” The words came out of his mouth without thought and he kind of wanted to take them back until the two people in his arms exchanged looks, and smiled softly.

“Same,” they said at the same time, their own hands, Boom Boom’s on the back of his neck, Bam Bam’s on his waist squeezed ever so gently, causing a gigantic wave of anticipation and affection crash through Kai’s body.

“Same time?” Bam Bam’s voice was so close to his ear that Kai almost flinched back in surprise at said proximity.

“Works for me.” He whispered instead and was pleased to see Boom Boom nod as well.

And then they were gone, goodbyes on the winds and Kai alone in his flat. He was walking past the sofa when he realised that he wasn’t the only one who had held on to their others’ bodies longer than strictly necessary in that situation. He felt the blood rush to his face again quickly, so he went to the restroom, and splashed water on it, in the hopes that he could convince himself-

That hope left him rather quickly, however, because when Kai looked at his reflection in the mirror, he knew that those red cheeks wouldn’t go away all too quickly, his breath still felt like it was caught in his throat, his insides were warm and fuzzy and all-together too caught up on those squishy feelings he was trying so hard not to acknowledge. He dug the heels of his hands into his eyes so harshly, he saw patterns of light flit across his visions and steadfastly ignored the heat in his face and chest.

“Tomorrow,” he mumbled to himself. “Tomorrow.”

His sleep was fitful that night, visions of his time overseas blurring and clashing violently with the domestic tranquillity of the evening he’d just lived through.

Chapter Text

He did not confront it ‘tomorrow.’ In fact, several weeks went by filled with curious glances and questions from Lucy and Kai doing his best to dodge all of them. He wasn’t ready to face the smile that played around his lips whenever he saw a message in that group chat (Bam Bam had changed the name to ‘inconceivable trio’ after that first movie night). He wasn’t ready for the way he immediately perked up when one of the two EODs was mentioned in conversation. He wasn’t ready to acknowledge the fact they’d even invaded his dreamscapes now and he certainly wasn’t ready to talk to Lucy Tara about any of it. She’d look at him with those big doe-eyes and be understanding and tell him to go for it, what’s the worst that can happen and… well the worst would be losing them and that was a possibility that Kai was, above all, not ready for.

So he kept going. He solved cases, he had movie nights, he ended up curled up on the sofa with two EODs every Sunday, and Kai didn’t think or talk about it.

Until Tennant’s helicopter went down.

They all went into recovery (read panic) mode too quickly. Too keen to get her back, to make sure she was safe.

Kai called Kate.

“Hey lov-,” Kai didn’t even blink before he started speaking, unable to process the teasing tone in her voice.

“Can you get us a helicopter?” A beat of silence and then Kate’s voice was all business.

“What for?” Kai ran a hand through his hair with a groan.

“Tennant went down, we’ve lost comms. Marshals are already dispatching a team, but I – we need to get to site.” He could hear her already typing something into her computer furiously before she was shouting something and he’d never been more grateful for this woman he could call a friend now.

“I’ll be there in 20.” She hung up without another word, so Kai turned and informed Ernie. Telling Jesse he had to come back and stay behind to be the boss was probably one of the hardest things he’d ever done but it was necessary. His marine training kicking in, emotions taking a backseat.

“And Ernie,” Kai paused, locking eyes with the man in question. “Have them dispatch an extra medical transport.” Kai’s blood froze in his veins.

“It was a prisoner transport. There’s at least five people on board. One bus might not be enough.” He took care to keep his face neutral, more used to these situations than Ernie was and he needed to keep it inside so he could function.

“Go,” Ernie said, his voice sounded just this side of choked up and Kai ground his teeth together.

“Get to Kate, then get to the site.” Kai nodded curtly before leaving.

When they got to the site he was glad for his combat hunter training and how he’d pushed himself when he was younger. The impressed look he got from Whistler didn’t hurt either when he confirmed he’d come first out of 200 and then –

“Hey, I heard about Tennant.” The familiar voice sent shivers down Kai’s spine. Even contorted through the phone’s loudspeaker, he recognised Boom Boom and it felt almost like a weight had been… maybe not lifted, the concern for Tennant too strong, but shifted, not as heavy anymore knowing this man was at Pearl helping.

“Not sure why, but I do feel a lot better now that Boom Boom’s there.” The words slipped out before he could think about them too hard. He locked eyes with Whistler whose brows seemed raised enough to touch her hairline and Kai felt a flush rise in his cheeks again.

“Thanks, Holman.” Boom Boom’s reply came accompanied by a chuckle that was definitely Boone and Kai wanted to sink into the ground right there and then.

“Alright, we’ll let you know if we find anything.” Jesse’s words rang out before the line cut.

“So,” Kate started, and Kai groaned in response. “We’re so talking about this later.” She promised, a curious gleam in her eyes.

“Yeah, yeah, come on.” He gestured in the direction they needed to head and started walking, resolutely not looking back at Kate or thinking about what he’d just said in front of almost the entire team but focusing on the task ahead.

***

The line went dead, and Boom Boom felt the pinprick of unease in the back of his neck. The feeling only intensified when he saw the map of the terrain and figured out that Kai was about to have to track into unknown territory.

“What can I do?” He needed to do something so he could try to forget his worry for a while. The special agent had really taken up residence in his feelings over the course of their weekly movie nights, the man constantly in the back of his mind, a quip always on the tip of his tongue to tease that dark flush onto his cheeks.

“Uh, well,” Jesse sighed, and it sounded almost a bit too defeatist to Boom Boom but he knew to be more sympathetic. The man was probably feeling about as helpless as he was, as his team was out in the unknown. Granted his feelings were purely platonic (familial, really Boom Boom knew enough about this team from Kai’s ramblings that they were more family than colleagues), but no one knew about Boom Boom’s change in feelings, so he was in no position to kick up a fuss.

“Other than offer moral support to Kai, I’m not sure that there’s much to do here at Pearl.” The words made Boom Boom pause. Had Kai…? Was he missing some key information here? He wasn’t aware of Agent Boone knowing anything about his leisure-time activities with Holman, or that he would be one to provide moral support.

“I disagree,” Ernie started speaking and Boom Boom paused his musings; this wasn’t the time. He had to focus to get Tennant and Holman out of this as safely as possible. Ernie gave him access to his office and computers, and Boom Boom fought hard not to smirk when he was gifted the information of the Top Secret snack drawer as well.

As soon as he was out of the briefing room, he took his phone out of his pocket and opened it to Bam Bam’s contact. He stared at the number for a couple seconds before hitting call. Fuck it, they had spoken about this and Kai was too important to both of them for her not to know what was happening.

“Sup, loser.” He couldn’t fight the grin pulling at the corners of his mouth but then his eyes caught sight of Kai’s empty desk and he sobered quickly.

“Tennant’s heli went down and Kai is on the ground to find her.” The silence on the other side of the phone was deafening and Boom Boom would’ve regretted his blunt delivery if he didn’t know Bam Bam like the back of his hand and knew that they were alike in this – no beating around the bush, just the facts.

“How bad are we talking, Norman?” He heard something being put down and then a door close.

“Ah, real names.” Boom Boom mused but the pinprick of unease had spread into an ever-present throbbing in his neck and shoulders, so he didn’t dwell on it.

“Kai should be okay. Heard something about his combat hunter training-“

“First in his class of 200.” Bam Bam interrupted, and Boom Boom let out a surprised, impressed noise.

“How come you know this, and I don’t?” Bam Bam let out a huff of laughter.

“Because I talk to him and don’t just tease,” He could practically hear her rolling her eyes. “Besides the point though, what’s the situation?” So, Boom Boom explained as best he could: Tennant’s interrogation, the case that led them there, the crash, Kai going in after her with Whistler.

“He’ll be okay though, right?” Her voice wavered a bit, and Boom Boom wished he could have her by his side right now, to have someone else close who understood.

“Yeah, Ava. He’ll be alright.” He’d made it to Ernie’s office and unlocked the door. “I’m gonna go do my part to get him back now. We need to understand this Harriman guy.”

“Keep me updated.” It wasn’t a request, but it was also not something Boom Boom would deny her.

“Of course.” He promised instead, as he logged into the computer. “I’ll let you know as soon as I know something.” She hung up without another word but Boom Boom was already clicking on the folder labelled ‘Harriman Files’ and opening the first file.

***

Kai was busy scanning the soft ground for tracks; fallen leaves small plants, and the recent rain obscured the prints in the earth. The forest was quiet except for the rustling of the breeze in the crowns of the trees and Kate and his breathing, the crunching of their feet on the ground.

Then Kate spotted the campground on the map which was a good lead especially seeing as the tracks were inconclusive, and then-

“Place of thieves.” Kai chuckled, how had he not thought of this before? He turned to Kate. “Place of thieves.” Kate’s face was blank with confusion.

“I feel like we’re playing a weird game I don’t understand.” Kai couldn’t keep the smile off his face.

“Moloka’i was a hideout for criminals for hundreds of years.” He explained, eyes scanning the surroundings. Truly, he should’ve thought about this from the start: of course, they would pick this place.

“It’s…” He spotted some more tracks to the east but turned back to Kate. “It’s an easy place to get lost.” He stepped closer to Kate to have a look at the map.

“Which way’s the campsite?”

“It’s that way.” Kate pointed east, Kai following her line of sight.

“That way, yeah.” Kai mumbled and set off, trusting Kate to follow. Soon the only sound around them was their footsteps, the trees winding up tall into the cloudy sky were guiding his way, the soft ground revealing its secrets showing him where to go.

“So, I know this is an important mission and we should probably not talk, but, um, that comment with Boom Boom?” Kai groaned but didn’t turn, thinking back on that shifted weight.

“Whistler – Kate – please, not now.” He heard Kate move behind him, but kept his eyes fixed on his surroundings to pick up on any changes in the environment.

“I’m going to let it go for now, because we’re in a high pressure situation, but you’re coming over for dinner with Lucy.” There was a stab of warmth in his gut, a tidal wave of emotion, affection and fondness, threatened to pull him under and he paused to look at her. Her blond hair shiny even in the grey light, her blue eyes wide and earnest, he couldn’t quite believe he even had people who cared so much about him.

“Sure.” He smiled wryly. “Let’s get out of here first though, okay?” Kate nodded but Kai could see the pleased lilt to her mouth at the agreement.

They found the campsite quickly. The evidence of human disturbance to nature piling up.

“Is this the way you thought the job would be when you moved to the FBI?” The people around them left them alone, which Kai wasn’t too mad about.

“I guess?” Kate shrugged. “I’ve seen cop shows.” That startled a laugh from Kai.

“It’s not quite the same, though, right?” Kate laughed with him.

“No.” They continued their walk through the campsite, and Kai couldn’t help but scan the area continuously looking for signs of Tennant or a struggle.

“It hurts your body a lot more when you get punched.” Kai chuckled with her, but then she continued, and he sobered.

“Hurts your heart a lot more when people you care about get punched.”  

“I would tell you you get used to it, but…” Kai trailed off – watching someone you cared about get hit was never easy.

“You’re bad at lying.” Kate laughed and Kai rolled his eyes.

“No, I’m a good liar.” He put on a faux-hurt expression and revelled in the grin it evoked in the FBI agent. “Just not to people I actually like.” He added on with a laugh.

“Kai.” The serious tone in Kate’s voice startled him, he turned back and saw her stare at something to their right.

“Yeah?” He turned to look at whatever she was seeing.

“Three o’clock.” There was a man leading a woman away from camp. “I think that guy’s pulling that woman away.”

“They’re certainly moving at a pace.” Kai agreed, an uneasy feeling clawed at his gut.

“Is that Harriman?” They started following them.

“Height and hair match, but…” He didn’t let his gaze stray from the duo moving away from them, if it was Harriman…

“Tall and balding don’t exactly make for a positive ID.” The grip the man had on the woman’s arm looked dodgy in every circumstance. Even if it wasn’t Harriman, this felt like something they should check on, so they kept moving, more intent in their steps, their shoulders set.

“Looks like he’s got a hostage.” Kai felt his blood boiling.

“Hey,” Kate stopped; Kai turned to look at her. “Why don’t you get as close behind them as you can without making him nervous.” Kai watched as Kate turned and started pulling her backpack off.

“What are you gonna do?” He watched in confusion as she reached for her badge, then back at the unlikely couple to keep track of them.

“Go around then come back in front of them.” Kai turned back to her.

“Hey, I…” He started but Kate cut him off.

“Thin, blonde girl is way less threatening than handsome, big guy.” She’s taken her badge off and Kai could spot some mirth in her eyes even as her determination shone through.

“Fair enough.” He shrugged; it made sense even if he didn’t particularly like where this was going.

“Okay. See you.” Kate whispered and then she was off. Kai turned and kept following the man and woman at a safe distance.

Then everything happened too quickly. He watched Kate walk to the man, the aggressive stance of him made him uneasy. He couldn’t make out what they were saying but then Kate reached for the man’s arm, and he twisted. The woman he had hostage tried to run; they were yelling; Kai jumped into a sprint. The man swung on Kate, she managed to land a punch to his cheek, but then he managed to land a proper hit on her, and his blood ran cold when he watched Kate crumple. She hit the ground and Harriman ran.

“Hey!” Kai screamed, his legs not moving fast enough – he had to get to her. Kate was lying on the ground still, too still. Kai pushed, his thighs burning. Harriman sprinted in the opposite direction, but Kai let himself drop next to Kate’s body. No way he was leaving her behind when he wasn’t sure about her condition. He cradled her head in his hands, checking for injuries. Her cheek would bruise but he couldn’t feel any wounds on her head from anything she would’ve hit on the way down, no blood clung to his fingers, and he had never been more glad. The weight shifted again. But she was unconscious, and he had to get her to someone. He called for a dispatcher who arrived pretty quickly from the campsite. She checked Kate over and Kai felt the weight shift again when she said Kate would be fine and awake in a couple minutes.

“Where’s Harriman?” Kai felt a relieved smile on his face at the sound of Kate’s voice.

“He went that way – into cover.” He indicated but soon turned back to her, relief palpable. “But hey, thanks to you, his hostage is safe.” Kate sat up slowly, Kai helping.

“Why did he grab her?” Her words were a bit slow but Kai tracked her movements and wasn’t too concerned about a concussion.

“They were headed to her car at the trailhead.” He could practically see the cogs turning in her head, eyes focused on the patch of forest Harriman disappeared into.

“So, he wasn’t meeting anyone.”

“No.” Kai’s heart was still beating too fast, worry for Kate alive under his skin making him fidget.

“He still needs to find a way out of the woods.” Her eyes were wide, her intent clear.

“Yeah… Hey,” he reached for her as she made to get up. “I’ve called for backup.” Kate groaned as the speed of her movements caught up to her, but she got up. Kai kept his hand out to steady her, not trusting that she might not go down again; his fingers itched to just wrap an arm around her to help her move, but he knew better than to assume.

“Medical team is on its way to help you, okay?” He started moving in Harriman’s direction.

“What? No. I – I’m coming with you.” He heard her follow him and faced her again.

“No. You just…” Kai paused, struggling for words. He didn’t want her to come with him, what he wanted was for her to be safe. Not just because Lucy might kill him if something serious happened to Kate but also because he didn’t want anything else to happen to her.

“You got punched in the face.” He urged, wanting, no needing, her to stay safe, away from harm. “You need to stay here and let them take a look at you.” He didn’t know what his face was doing but he tried, tried so hard to actually put all his emotions out there for once, to make her see that he needed her to stay and for medical to check her out so he could be sure she was okay.

“Kai, I’m fine.” She hissed and he knew, he knew why. She was a woman in a male-dominated job, she had to be tougher than others but for once Kai wished there was a way to make her stop and sit and be looked after.

“How can you be sure?” He tried one more time, the concern for his friend wrapped like a vine around his lungs, making breathing more difficult.

“Well,” she started walking away, the determined gate telling Kai he’d lost this battle. “I played field hockey. I know what a concussion feels like.”

“Hey, Stop, Whistler-“ He tried one more time but she interrupted him.

“Hey, we’re wasting time.” The fierce set of her eyes startled Kai but

“Tennant wasn’t with him, so…” She trailed off and Kai swallowed harshly, looking away. He knew she had a point but that didn’t mean he needed to like it. He looked away, letting his gaze analyse the woods ahead.

“She’s either still out there searching for him or…” He sighed, turning back to Kate. “… Or he left her someplace and we need to know where.” The look on her face was pure determination and Kai felt himself wavering.

“Yeah.” She paused and shrugged, her stance defensive. “So, are you planning to tie me to a tree?” Her raised brows and expectant body language made Kai flush and he gave in.

“No.” His tone clearly showed he wasn’t happy about it, but he didn’t want to stand in her way. He knew what it was like when people in your job were against you, when you had to be extra careful, work extra hard because of something you could not control. He wouldn’t stand in her way.

“All right, then let’s go.” She set off and Kai could do nothing else but follow. At least if he was with her, he could make sure nothing else happened to her. The woods were quiet when they set off, but Kai could see Harriman’s tracks clearly. Determination settled deep in his bones.

***

They caught Harriman, the heli found Tennant and Kai even managed to convince Kate to stop by medical on the way back to Pearl. In the end, he was just relieved it was all over. When they stepped out of the elevator though, he felt himself stiffen again, because there was Boom Boom, looking a bit like death warmed up, a worry crease between his brows. The man’s eyes raked over Kai’s entire body as if to make sure that he was unharmed, and Kai felt himself grow hot with it, his skin goose-pimpling as if Boom Boom’s gaze was a physical thing.

“Did I miss an office party?” Tennant chuckled and Kai found himself following her cautiously, eyes not leaving Boom Boom’s even as he felt Kate’s gaze on the side of his face.

“We just wanted to make sure you were okay.” The relief was evident in Jesse’s smile and the way his shoulders relaxed immediately.

“Now that we’ve seen you, though, I’m not sure the answer is yes.” Chase gave Jesse the side-eye before her worried gaze scanned Tennant for any less obvious injuries.

“Ah, Tennant laughs in the face of small cuts and scrapes.” Boom Boom’s voice soothed a part of Kai’s psyche that he hadn’t noticed was unsettled. “And what looks like a pretty big bruise from direct gunfire.” The assembled group eyed Tennant who just sent them a cocky smirk.

“Right in the vest. .40 cal.”

“That and falling in a lava tube, that’s a lot for a day.” Kai added, startling a chuckle from the group.

“Do you need something to eat?” Kate spoke up. “Or a ride home?”

“No, I’m okay.” Tennant turned to her with a smile before looking at each of them reassuringly. “I… I promise. I’m fine.” Kai noted that none of them looked exactly convinced yet, but this was Tennant. She wasn’t going to do anything she didn’t want to do.

Jesse started talking about bodies in a lake but Kai found he couldn’t listen. He was transfixed by Boom Boom who hadn’t looked away from him since it had been evident that Tennant was okay (or at least okay enough to go home and for them not to worry too much). The man continued to check his body for wounds over the short distance between them and then locked eyes with him as if to non-verbally ask if he was okay. Kai felt that warm something spread in his chest again and wanted nothing more than to give in to it, to let it crack open his ribs and cover his whole body, let this man see his heart for the raw, vulnerable thing that it was, wanted to, honestly, cry for how scared and tense he’d been all day (first Tennant, then Whistler as well) but they were still at Pearl, his team was around him and this was neither the time nor the place. So he stood in silence, shuffled from foot to foot occasionally to distract himself until Tennant moved, slowly walking away towards her office.

“Thank you,” she breathed as she turned back to all of them one more time. She looked weary and bruised but she was here and she was alive and that was all that mattered.

“No,” Kai shook his head slightly. “We’re just doing our jobs, boss.” The wry smile she sent him told him that she knew he was lying but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. They were doing their jobs, even if their emotions maybe played into this one a bit more than usual.

“It’s a nice sentiment,” Tennant chuckled. “But that’s not what this was – and you all know it.” She locked eyes with each of them, and the fact was, that they did all know. This was much more than just their jobs. She pressed her lips together and nodded at them in thanks and acknowledgement. Kai thought he might be able to see the glassy shine of unshed tears in her eyes but it could’ve been the lights, because she turned and walked away with a:

“Everybody should go home now.” They watched her go, before all looking at each other trying to figure out what to do. Kai knew they were all still desperate to make sure Tennant was alright but as he looked around, he could see a bone-deep tiredness set in in all of them. They’d been under high stress for too long. Jesse and Chase went first, leaving him alone with Kate and Boom Boom. The atmosphere felt weirdly charged and Kai was unsure how to navigate it. A part of him wanted nothing more than to go home alone, curl up in bed and just sleep; another part of him wanted to go with Boom Boom (or have Boom Boom come to his) and curl up with him, maybe invite Bam Bam as well; but yet another part knew that he’d agreed to go with Kate to see Lucy and talk.

“C’mon, Kai,” Kate’s voice shook him out of the staring contest he was having with his shoes. “Lucy is waiting.” He looked at her to see her slip her phone back in her pocket and then looked over at Boom Boom. The man looked as torn as Kai felt which was…

“I’ll let Bam Bam know you’re okay,” the man whispered and Kai felt a stab of pain in his heart.

“Bam Bam was worried?” The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them, and he watched an incredulous look pass over Boom Boom’s face.

“Of course, she was.” He said it like it was the most obvious thing but Kai was still confused.

“How did she even know-“

“I called her when I found out.” Boom Boom interrupted him and Kai fel this eyes widen even further. He heard a quiet intake of breath followed by a soft choking sound from his left but he didn’t turn to look at Kate, he was too focused on Boom Boom’s words, the tense line of his shoulders, the worry clearly written in the lines of his brow and mouth.

“You… didn’t need to do that?” They were friends sure, but Kai was struggling to grasp why it was so pertinent that Boom Boom had called Bam Bam. “It’s not like I was the one who went down in the helicopter…” He trailed off when he saw a Boom Boom roll his eyes.

“No, you weren’t.” He agreed. “You were the one who walked into unknown territory without really a way to find Tennant while a potential murderer was on the run in said forest.” Kai couldn’t help the sheepish grin that graced his face at that and he scratched the back of his neck.

“Well, when you put it like that…” Boom Boom’s face still looked wildly unimpressed and Kai was about to add that he’d known what he was doing, when the man stepped up closer to him and clasped his shoulder in one hand. The contact was warm, and sent electricity crackling over his skin; he felt like he’d been branded.

“I’ll text you, sweetheart.” Kai stared at him with wide eyes, felt the heat of Boom Boom’s hand spread up his neck and to his cheeks in a furious blush at the petname. “See ya, Whistler.” He nodded at her and left with a squeeze to Kai’s shoulder that left his knees wobbly and his hands clenched into fists.

“Don’t,” he snapped at Kate when he heard a soft intake of air as if she was about to speak.

“Not saying anything,” she was grinning, hands held up in faux innocence but Kai couldn’t really be mad. If this was the other way around, he’d probably be teasing her as well.

“Let’s get home to your girlfriend so I can watch you explain to her why you didn’t listen to me when I told you to stay back for a concussion check.” Kai stepped past Kate, letting his shoulder bump hers and laughed at the outraged gasp his words elicited.

“You wouldn’t dare.” She hissed as she hurried to follow.

“Try me.” He grinned as he called the elevator.

***

Lucy and Kate’s apartment was clean and smelled like the vanilla candles Lucy kept on her desk at Pearl.

“Are you both okay?” Kate and Kai exchanged looks. This was going to be a long evening.

When they were done recounting the events of the day, they were sitting on the couch, Lucy motionless on the coffee table in front of them.

“Luce?” The woman in question blinked slowly, gaze focusing on Kai, then turning to Kate.

“You walked up to Harriman… just like that?” Kate had the grace to wince, but Kai didn’t think it was going to sway Lucy’s wrath. “Then you refused the medical check-up, and continued after him instead?” Her gaze flitted to Kai before returning to her. “And then you let this idiot walk up to a car where the armed suspect was hiding without a gun?” Kate and Kai exchanged another look and shrugged helplessly.

“Look, Tara,” Kai started but paused at the withering look she gave him. “Lucy, it was fine. She did get checked by medical on the way back to Pearl and they cleared her.” Lucy raised an eyebrow and harumphed.

“I will be talking to you,” she poked a finger at Kate’s collarbones harshly. “Later. For now, though,” she turned back to Kai. “Tell us more about this thing with Boom Boom again.”

“His line of ‘Oh I feel so much better now that Boom Boom is here’ was truly priceless.” Kate giggled and Kai made an affronted noise at the terrible imitation of his voice.

“First of all, I did not say it like that.” Kate rolled her eyes and Kai shoved her shoulder affectionately. “That slipped out.” He grumbled, pulling his knees up, resting his feet on the edge of the couch.

“It’s cute, don’t get me wrong.” Lucy rested a hand on one of his knees and smiled softly; Kai wanted to curl up and never leave.

“Just… I think you should tell him – them?” Lucy cocked her head to the side in question and Kai let his head drop to rest against his legs.

“Yeah, them… I know…” He felt Kate’s hand fall to his back, moving in soothing motions, mirroring Lucy’s hand on his knee. “I just – it’s terrifying even telling one person that you like them and wanna date them, but two? And they know each other as well!” Kai groaned.

“What if they’re not poly? What if they stop talking to me – I genuinely don’t think I could go back to before they were my friends?”

“Kai… Kai.” Kate’s hand had wandered up to the back of his neck, the weight of it soothing. “I really don’t think you have anything to worry about.” Kai turned his head to level her with a questioning glance.

“No, really. Boom Boom looked ready to take you home to personally check you for injuries tonight.” He groaned and buried his face in his legs again; Kate and Lucy laughed.

“And the fact that Bam Bam was also worried, and he was going to tell her you were, okay? That he called her right away when he realised the perilous situation you were in?” Kai let out another groan, shaking his head.

“That’s the problem though, isn’t it? It looks like that but…” He paused, sighed, let the words form and reform. “If it isn’t and I proposition them both… I still have to work with them occasionally, I’ll see them around and they’re gonna hate me.” He could feel Kate and Lucy exchange looks, a silent conversation happening over his head, but he also couldn’t face it yet.

Then his phone chimed; Lucy gasped.

“Shit, sorry, sorry.” Kai looked up to see her holding his phone out to him. “I didn’t mean to look it was just there.” Kai rolled his eyes fondly.

“It’s fine, just – give it here.” He took the phone and froze, heart in his throat.

BB to inconceivable trio [21:42]: can we see you tomorrow?

Kai stared at his screen until it went dark and all he saw reflected back to him was his own shocked face.

“I think you should tell them.” Kate whispered and Kai turned to look at her, but she just smiled softly, and motioned for his phone with her chin. Kai locked eyes with Lucy in front of him who gave him another gentle, reassuring smile before she stood and pulled Kate up with her.

“I think it’s been a long day, and we should all rest.” She spoke softly, so softly Kai thought it might break him. “It’s always up to you, Kai. You’re allowed good things, you’re allowed soft things, and you’re allowed to not jeopardise your heart.” She ruffled his hair, and he couldn’t even find it in himself to care.

“But you’re also allowed to follow it.”

“Wise words, Tara.” He chuckled and Lucy stuck her tongue out at him.

“I’m plenty wise.” She reached out a hand to help him up. “Now get out, I got a girlfriend to take care of.” Kai laughed as Kate grumbled at Lucy’s side that she didn’t need taking care of, thank you very much, she was perfectly fine. But Kai just hugged them both, feeling too drained to do much else other than give in to every single soft urge he’s ever had and then he stepped out into the night.

agent boi to inconceivable trio [21:58]: my place at 1800?

***

He’d spent the day in bed, only making his way out around lunch time to eat and do prep for the evening. He was determined to at least have one last nice dinner and movie night with the two people he’d gone and fallen for before they inevitably stopped wanting to be around him. The little voice in the back of his head that sounded suspiciously like Lucy and Kate kept reminding him that he might have hope, but he’d been burned too many times to listen.

Everything went by in a blur, he cut vegetables, prepared meat, cooked, poured drinks, meanwhile the slow melancholy notes of music he’d put on at some point kept him company. Soft voices crooned into the empty air of his apartment, gentle beats moved his hips occasionally as he stirred, only to be cut through by the shrill sound of the doorbell.

He moved on autopilot, brain not fully online, but whether it was leftover trance from yesterday’s stress or the feeling of impending doom in his stomach, he didn’t know.

“You look like hell.” Bam Bam’s voice was tense as she pushed past him into the apartment, turning him with hands on his shoulders as she went. Kai let himself be moved, not trusting himself to really say anything.

“He’s fine.” Boom Boom followed her in with a small smile, head ducked almost apologetic and Kai cocked his head in confusion.

“Easy for you to say – you got to see him yesterday.” Bam Bam’s hands had skirted up Kai’s neck to his face and was framing it by the cheeks; he was helpless not to just stare right back at her intense eyes.

“Hm,” she harumphed and her hands tightened their grip briefly before she let go. “Food first, then movie and talk.” They took off their shoes and urged Kai into his kitchen. He watched from the doorway as they pulled bowls and cutlery from the cupboards, delighted in the smells coming from the pot on the stove and held low, rumbling conversations the words of which he could’ve understood if he’d tried, but he found himself lost in the scene unfolding in front of him as if in a haze. They moved to fluidly around his space, a quiet confidence of people who knew where everything was and that they were welcome, it threatened to crash over Kai and pull him under and he wasn’t sure how to stop it (or even if he wanted to).

He let himself be pulled to a seat at the kitchen table, a bowl of the soup he’d made in front of him, Bam Bam’s hand on his shoulder as she handed him a spoon, Boom Boom’s fingers trailing his back as he moved to take his own seat, and he let himself be pulled into their conversation. Boom Boom talked about what had happened at Pearl while Kai was out; Bam Bam lamented how useless she’d felt stuck at Forensics on another case. Eventually they turned to him, and he recounted the events of the day. 

“Let me get this straight,” Boom Boom was frowning; Kai wasn’t sure why. “You walked up to a dangerous guy with a gun… without a gun of your own?” That startled a laugh out of Kai. He laughed and laughed, those words echoed Lucy’s so perfectly, he couldn’t help it.

“Sorry,” he mumbled when he noticed his friends’ confused (and concerned?) faces. “That’s just – almost exactly what Tara said when Kate and I told her last night.” Some kind of tension seemed to bleed from Boom Boom and Bam Bam’s posture and Kai did his best to smile at them reassuringly.

“Thought we told you last time not to get yourself in unnecessary dangerous situations, Holman.” Boom Boom raised a challenging eyebrow; Kai scratched the back of his neck self-consciously.

“Especially when we’re not around to save your sorry ass.” Bam Bam added; Boom Boom nodded in agreement.

“Next time I’ll patiently wait for you to make your way there.” Kai deadpanned, rolling his eyes, earning himself twinned gasps from the other two.

“He did not just say that.” Bam Bam was grinning though, so Kai didn’t think he’d fucked up too badly.

“Think he did.” Boom Boom scowled, but his eyes were sparkling with a mirth that made Kai feel light. When had these two buried their way so deeply into his heart? It was terrifying and Kai kind of wanted to run, but then Boom Boom was gathering up their empty bowls and set them down in the sink and Bam Bam grabbed his hand and pulled him into the living room, letting herself fall down on the couch, dragging Kai down with her and reaching for the remote.

“Go on then, princess,” Kai shivered at Boom Boom’s voice suddenly next to him. “You get to pick tonight.” He steadfastly ignored that reaction for now and locked eyes with Bam Bam who grinned and handed him the remote. They’d made some progress in showing Boom Boom all their favourite 80s romcoms and the man had only ever complained on the surface. The way he’d immediately shut up and become engrossed in the films were good enough indicators for Kai and Bam Bam that he was enjoying them. So, Kai grabbed the remote and found the film that Bam Bam and he had picked as their next must-see.

“Another one?” Boom Boom groaned but simultaneously settled further into the couch, pulling Bam Bam’s legs up on his lap and resting his arm on the back of the couch behind Kai, letting his fingers trail along Kai’s shoulder. Bam Bam giggled but then hushed as Pretty in Pink started playing on the screen. Kai had seen the film enough times that he let his thoughts wander, watching Boom Boom and Bam Bam out the corner of his eyes. They looked so right here in this space, on his couch, with him. It had been a while since he’d felt this at ease, if he was honest with himself (which was more of a rarity than he’d like to admit). He’d learned quickly that it was safer to keep emotions inside, not let others catch on to how sensitive he was to others’ words and thoughts and feelings; had learned to put on masks, hypermasculine behaviours to shield his softer emotions; had known it to be safer to not loudly broadcast his sexuality or romantic inclinations. Only after his stint with the marines when he’d joined NCIS and returned to Hawai’i had he told his father, because at least then if his father had kicked him out for good, he would’ve been fine on his own because he’d been on his own. He’d hid it less when his father had accepted him, had accepted that Kai might bring home a woman, man or mahū, accepted him for who he was without question, but with unshed tears in his eyes that his son trusted him enough to share. It had healed something between them that Kai had thought lost; it wasn’t perfect, not yet, maybe not ever, but it built a bridge and welcomed Kai home.

On screen, he watched as Duckie danced around his feelings for Andie and felt a stab in his heart, painful reminder of his own feelings, his own dancing around the two people currently curled on the couch with him. Kai had pulled up his legs at some point, Bam Bam’s feet had made their way into his lap, where he’s rested his hands on her ankles, Kai’s upper body, meanwhile, was safely tucked into Boom Boom’s side where he was sitting in the middle, his heavy arm curled around Kai’s shoulder and side, his hand resting comfortably on Kai’s waist, fingers drawing invisible patterns. Bam Bam was commenting on the fashion of the film, Boom Boom let out affirming grunts every now and then and Kai never wanted this film to end.

“Molly Ringwald is just so beautiful.” Bam Bam wished at one point; Kai and Boom Boom nodded their agreement.

“What’s the guy called – Duckie?” Boom Boom questioned.

“Yeah, Duckie’s right.” Bam Bam raised an eyebrow. “Actor’s name is Harry Stanton.”

“Yeah him,” Boom Boom nodded. “Pretty.” Kai let his head rest against him a bit heavier as the two continued to discuss the attractiveness of the various characters in the film. Occasionally Kai chimed in when he agreed or disagreed. His favourite had always been Iona, the owner of the record store, for the freedom she seemed to have, to dress how she wanted, to say what she wanted, to do what she wanted.

“Gah, that dress.” Bam Bam exclaimed when Andie’s prom dress was revealed on screen. “I was never a massive fan of the dot fabric, but the cut of the lace at her chest and back? Art.”

“Sheesh, the suit with those glasses and the bolo tie?” Boom Boom smirked appreciatively as the cut of Duckie standing at the top of the stairs lingered. Bam Bam and Kai laughed.

“Yes, go on my boy Jack!” Boom Boom exclaimed as Jack realised why Steff had always been such a dick to Andie and took her side; Bam Bam and Kai exchanged a fond look that immediately made Kai flounder so he looked away and back at the screen where Jack was telling Andie that he loves her always, and as Duckie began his final speech, he looked at these two people next to him whom he knew he could come to love like Duckie loved Andie, like Jack loved Andie, like Andie loved Jack and fuck.

“I think I like you.” Kai froze as he felt the words leave his mouth and he could feel Boom Boom tense at his side, Bam Bam’s leg under his hand flexed; on screen Andie and Jack kissed in the parking lot.

“Come again?” Bam Bam’s voice was a whisper, soon drowned out by The Psychedelic Furs singing Pretty in Pink. Kai kept his eyes fixated on the tv, screen black, a blur of white letters coasting by. Then the music stopped and the text on screen stopped moving and Kai was aware that Boom Boom had paused the end credits.

“Kai?” His voice was uncharacteristically soft; it was Kai’s undoing.

“Fuck, real names, huh?” he cursed and ran a hand over his face. “Just… I think I like you? Both of you?” The silence felt like it lingered for hours, months, years. Kai ploughed through. “Feel free to leave if you want, I know it’s… a lot? I don’t even… I’m not good at this ‘talking about feelings’ thing. Never have been.” He laughed humourlessly, still unable to look at the two other people on the sofa.

“I just needed to tell you because it was driving me insane.” A beat, two, he could feel his heart in his throat. “Fuck, yeah no, I shouldn’t have,” but he was cut off by Ava.

“Please don’t take it back.” Just like Norman, her voice was strangely soft, a tone Kai had never heard in it before swinging in with it.

“What?” He croaked, cursing the crack in his voice even on that single word, but he finally looked away from the screen and at the two people he’d just confessed to. Ava was no longer reclined but had sat up, eyes wide, hands wrapped around one of Norman’s, holding it in a tight grip. The man in question was equally tense, the arm that was still wrapped around Kai was flexed, he could feel the tense and release of the muscle even as he looked up to see his eyes trained on every movement Kai was making as if expecting him to bolt. Which… he couldn’t say he wasn’t tempted. They gazes were intense and Kai found it impossible to read them.

“We’ve been…” Norman’s voice cracked, much like Kai’s had just done and Kai felt his eyes grow wide in response. “We’ve been kinda thinking the same thing.” Kai felt the huff of laughter move his hair because he was still just so close to Norman who had not let him get away.

“Are you – you’re being serious?” He swallowed harshly, eyes flitting between Norman and Ava.

“We wouldn’t tease you about this.” Ava said, pulling her legs from their laps and twisting them underneath her body so she could lean in closer to them. “I, well, I can only speak for myself, I know I hinted at it to Norman before, but… if you’re interested, we could – I think we could make this work.” She ended with a lopsided smile, her eyes trained on Kai.

“We’ve kind of already been dating for a couple months if you think about it.” Norman added and Kai whipped his head round to look up at him.

“We have?” He choked, mind suddenly filled with all their movie nights, coffee outings with just one of them, knowing they went on lunch dates, that time Norman had taken Kai to the beach at sunset, that time the three of them had headed out to the beach for a walk between dinner and their weekly movie, how worried they had been when Kai got in dangerous situations, how worried he was whenever he heard one, or both of them, had to go near any active explosive device to defuse it.

“Oh fuck.” He whispered, eliciting laughter from the two people on his couch.

“Yeah…” Ava trailed off, reaching out the hand that wasn’t currently clutching Norman’s to offer it to Kai. He stared at it for what felt like an eternity, felt the fingers of Norman’s free hand twist into the fabric of his shirt at his waist, and made a decision. He took her hand; her smile was blinding.

Then he felt himself move as Norman’s arm tightened around his back and he saw Ava in a similar predicament as the man pulled them both in closer to his sides.

“Finally.” He grumbled and Kai and Ava locked eyes and burst out in laughter, their faces buried in Norman’s chest, Kai had never felt more at peace, until –

“One more thing,” he started. Norman groaned but let him pull his body away from them so he could look at them both.

“I’m ace.” He hurried, eyes trained on their faces, ready for the rejection, but… they just smiled?

“Okay.” Norman nodded and moved to pull him back in, but Kai resisted.

“Okay?” He cocked his head in confusion, causing Ava and Norman to exchange equally confused glances. “That – I’ve never… You really don’t care?”

“Kai,” Ava paused, speaking slowly as if she was trying not to startle a spooked animal. “Why should… We care in that it’s a part of you and we’re happy you felt comfortable to share this with us, but…”

“It changes nothing in how we feel about you.” Norman finished and Ava nodded in agreement. Kai felt his eyes bug.

“I just,” he let himself be pulled in a bit closer, the proximity to them soothing some part of him that hadn’t quite believed that they were telling the truth. “My previous relationships… this was a massive thing? They couldn’t get over the fact, that I wasn’t – attracted to them like that.”

“They sound like dicks.” Ava said, deadpan, startling a chuckle out of Kai.

“Yeah, they kinda were.” He agreed, ready to just sink back into Norman’s embrace when the man spoke up.

“You just tell us where your boundaries are and we’ll stick to them.” Another pang in his heart, warmth in his chest, Kai wanted to never leave this moment, even as his vision went blurry with tears he blinked away.

“Absolutely,” Ava agreed, and her hand gave his a squeeze. “Like are cuddles on the table? Hand holding? Kissing? Tell us what you’re comfortable with.”

“Um, yeah.” Kai swallowed around the lump that had suddenly appeared in his throat. “All of those are – I like those.” The smile on their faces was blinding and Kai never wanted them to stop. Then he felt his heartrate pick up again as Ava leaned in closer.

“May I kiss you?” Kai felt his mouth go dry, she was so close, he could feel Norman’s arm tighten around him and there were few things he wanted more right now than to kiss this beautiful woman in front of him. So, he nodded. The kiss was altogether innocent and so so soft. Kai marvelled at the press of her lips against his, the solid heat of Norman along the rest of his body, her hand in his and then she was gone and Kai could only chase her, press his lips to hers one more time, before he felt another press of lips against his temple and he looked at Norman who smiled.

“Lotta kisses going round here.” Ava honest-to-goodness giggled (a sound Kai never thought he’d hear from her) and Kai couldn’t help but join her even as he pushed up to press a kiss to Norman’s lips as well. The man hummed against his mouth, kissed him back and Kai was floating. He pulled back to tuck himself back into Norman’s side and smiled seeing Ava and Norman kiss as well. He wished, not for the first time, that he could bottle up moments in jars, keep this one on his shelf so he could revisit this, this happiness, this moment with two of his favourite people who loved to tease him, fluster him and make him flounder, who made him to watch terrible action movies, who enjoyed horror films just as much as him, who praised his cooking and stayed.

“One more?” Norman asked, pressing a kiss to Ava’s head and then Kai’s and Kai couldn’t even find it in himself to question how soft and vulnerable he was being in the moment, before he nodded his ascent, and watched Ava flip through the movies on offer. He let his eyes close, focusing on the fluttering feeling of affection and love in his chest, like a bird threatening to break the cage of his ribs and spring free into the world all happy song and bright colours.

Chapter Text

They’d agreed to keep it to themselves for a while, figure out how they would navigate this relationship in private and public before telling anyone. So, Kai went about his days, took the teasing from Lucy and Kate on the chin but every time they mentioned Boom Boom or Bam Bam he had to fight to keep the sappy smile from his face. He had enough experience in hiding his true emotions that it was truly not that difficult although he did feel bad every time he saw that spark of hope die in Lucy’s eyes when she was so sure he’d finally got the guts to confess.

The privacy they had right now though was something he didn’t want to give up. Movie night was still a regular weekly occurrence, except now they included kisses hello and goodbye. Kai had found himself on the receiving end of many a back hug as he was cooking and he marvelled at his domestic fantasies come to life every time he watched Ava and Norman navigate around his space, setting the table or getting blankets for the couch, grabbing drinks from the fridge or, that one-time last week when Norman had decided to bake cookies for them.

Today was another date night, not movie night those were different, but this morning Ava had texted the group chat for everyone to meet at hers at 1900 for a surprise. Kai knew he wasn’t hiding his excitement well when he kept getting strange looks at work and finally Ernie snapped.

“What is with you today?” He put down the file he’d been holding, and levelled Kai with a look that made the taller man take a step back.

“What do you mean?” He tried to deflect but he knew that once Ernie had got a question in his mind, he was like a blood hound on a trail.

“You keep smiling, dude.” The deadpan tone reminded Kai so much of Bam Bam that he laughed, causing further confusion to cloud Ernie’s gaze.

“’s nothing.” He added quickly. “Just… don’t tell the others yet, but I got a date tonight.” No point in lying outright – it was like he’d told Kate weeks ago, he was good at lying, just not to the people he cared about.

“A date? You?” Ernie looked sceptical but Kai just shrugged.

“Yeah, even I can get a date sometimes.” That earned him a laugh.

“Alright, alright,” Ernie shook his head, salt-and-pepper curls flying. “She must be quite something to have you practically giddy.” Kai’s thoughts immediately went to Bam Bam and he fought the grin down, so as to not give himself away.

“Yeah,” Kai trailed off, leaving Ernie to fill in any blanks. And fill in he did – in an entire monologue, he listed whatever qualities he thought Kai would be looking for in a partner. Kai humoured him, surprised when he got some right, laughing when he got them horrifically wrong.

“Okay, folks, that’s it for today.” Tennant had come out of her office where she’d been on the phone most of the day and stood in the middle of the desks. Ernie paused his monologuing to turn to her, still stood at Kai’s desk.

“We’ll keep going tomorrow, get some sleep and we’ll reconvene at 0900.” They all nodded, and Kai was quick to grab his stuff, pulling his phone out, when it chimed again with a message.

Ava [17:02] wear the dark green shirt x

Kai felt the blush rise to his cheeks immediately, shortly followed by multiple wolf whistles and Ernie’s voice next to him.

“Ava? What a lovely name.” Kai locked his phone quickly and looked around: Jesse and Lucy were standing in front of him with raised eyebrows, Ernie next to him with a smirk on his lips.

“Who is Ava?” Lucy asked, her arms crossed over her chest.

“His date tonight, I assume.” Ernie said, Kai grimaced at the shocked look appearing on Lucy’s face. “Seeing as she told him to wear the dark green shirt.”

“A date?” Jesse moved to leave, patting Kai’s back in praise. “Good on ya – have fun, be safe.” He winked and stepped into the elevator, leaving Kai alone with Lucy and Ernie.

“I ask again,” Lucy had stepped closer to Kai, her face serious. “Who is Ava?” Kai winced.

“Like Ernie said, she’s my date tonight.” Ernie smiled gleefully and Kai could see Lucy wanting to argue but a voice cut through before she could begin.

“Leave him be, Lucy.” Tennant put one hand on Kai’s shoulder, the other on Lucy’s and smiled. They both folded quickly, Tennant’s strangely maternal moments too much for either of them to go up against.

“He’ll introduce us, when he’s ready.” Kai had never been so grateful for her. “Now come on, Whistler is waiting for you at home, no?” Lucy mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like we’re not done talking about this but then Tennant had whisked her away, then Ernie just patted his arm with a lop-sided smile and followed. And he was alone. He just heart-reacted to Bam Bam’s message and then called the elevator back so he could head off as well.  

He took his time to shower and get ready, putting on the cologne he knew Boom Boom liked and the dark green shirt Bam Bam had asked him to wear. He texted Boom Boom, then he hopped in his car. He let the music wash over him on the drive to pick up his boyfriend (boyfriend!), windows down, the breeze warmed his skin, ruffled his hair, the salt on the air settled something in him, reminded him he was home and safe.

You [18:47] I’m outside x

The heart-react popped up almost immediately and then two minutes later the door to the apartment complex opened and Boom Boom stepped out. Kai let his head fall back against the headrest. The man approached his car with a smile, Kai wolf whistled as he took in Boom Boom’s pastel pink shirt that stretched artfully over his chest.

“Looking good,” Kai called out and Boom Boom smirked, twirled on his way over before leaning in through the driver window.

“I like the shirt, sweetheart.” Kai grinned and pushed Boom Boom back gently.

“Get in, B, or we’ll be late.” The man in question returned the grin twofold and hurried around the car to drop into the passenger seat.

“Hi,” Kai felt his heart speed up as he leaned in over the console to press a quick kiss to his lips.

“Hi,” he breathed back, the casual physicality still new to him even though it felt so natural that he wanted to wrap himself up in it and never let it (them) go. He felt caught in the moment for a beat, just frozen in motion, gaze locked on Boom Boom’s dark eyes, his toothy smile, and the warmth of his hand on Kai’s thigh.

“C’mon then,” Boom Boom’s smile turned into a smirk. “Or have I struck you speechless and dumb.” Kai pushed at his chest with a grunt of annoyance.

“Shut up,” he started up the car again and pulled out of the parking spot. The drive to Bam Bam’s flat was relatively short. Boom Boom spent the ride teasing Kai about his music but Kai found that, while, yes, he still felt the blush heat his cheeks and he fumbled his words, it was much nicer being able to spot the fond gleam in Boom Boom’s eyes whenever he did so.

They arrived at Bam Bam’s with a couple of minutes to spare, so Kai texted her as he got out of the car.

“There she is.” Boom Boom was suddenly at his side and slung an arm over Kai’s shoulders, as they both watched Bam Bam approach. She had a duffle bag slung over her shoulder and a grin graced her face, her hair was down and curled around her face softly.

“Hello, beautiful.” He heard Boom Boom greet her (he couldn’t agree more) as she leaned up for a kiss, then she turned to Kai for the same. His breath stuttered and he was beginning to think that this whole relationship thing was bad for his health.

“Hello, men,” she greeted which startled a laugh out of them. “I am glad to see you heeded my requests.” She continued, nodding at their attire and Kai ran a hand over his chest self-consciously.

“I’m driving.” She continued before either of them could say anything though, so they piled back into the car, Boom Boom choosing to sit in the back with Kai, quips flying about Bam Bam being the chauffeur and Kai had rarely felt so at ease. They didn’t drive for long, 20 minutes maybe, the sky was beginning to grow dusky when Bam Bam pulled over into a car park. They’d driven out of Honolulu and up into the mountains, trees replacing buildings and as it always did a sense of peace and calm washed over Kai as soon as it happened. He’d always felt closer to nature and himself when he was out here, outside of the confines of manmade civilisation. Bam Bam opened his door for him, sticking her tongue out at Boom Boom when he complained.

“Only one person gets princess treatment tonight,” she winked at Kai who rolled his eyes but felt that now familiar warm feeling pool in his stomach as he took her hand, lacing their fingers together before stepping away from the car.

“You know, I wish I could be madder about that,” Boom Boom appeared next to them, draping an arm over Bam Bam’s shoulders, pulling her close, Kai being dragged along.

“But he does deserve it, ain’t that right, princess.” He winked at Kai over Bam Bam’s head and Kai felt his cheeks heat at the nickname.

“Not a princess,” he grumbled but he couldn’t keep the smile off his face when Bam Bam squeezed his hand and Boom Boom let the hand he had hanging over her shoulder bump into Kai’s. He was sensing a pattern here that would mean he couldn’t ever truly stay mad at them, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about it (he loved it).

Bam Bam led them away from the empty carpark down a winding paved path that was soon surrounded by tall, thin trees, solid rock formations peeking through, lining the path until they got to a platform. By now the sky was painted with vibrant red, pinks and oranges, the sun almost gone, swallowed by the ocean. Kai inhaled the fresh air deeply, heard Boom Boom gasp at the view ahead of them. They could see all the way down the slopes to where Honolulu was cradled between mountains and ocean. The city lights were slowly blinking on in the distance, it looked like a sea of stars pulled down to earth or maybe reality had shifted somewhere along the path, and they were staring down at space, stars twinkling in grey-, green- and rose-coloured galaxies.

“Beautiful.” He whispered and got hums of agreement from the two people next to him. Bam Bam pulled them to the edge of the viewing platform and sighed happily.

“Isn’t it?” She reached into the duffle bag and pulled out a small box. Opening it revealed a batch of cookies. “I hiked up here the first night I was stationed on O’ahu.” She started, offering the cookies to her boyfriends. “It’s not like it’s much of a secret spot, really. The tourists come here all the time, but it’s special anyway, to me.” She shrugged and stashed the box of cookies again.

“Plus,” she paused and started walking down an unpaved path that led further into the rocky landscape that was surrounding this place. “It’s just high enough that you can see the stars.” Kai and Boom Boom exchanged a look of excitement and made to follow her. The walk wasn’t long until they reached a little natural plateau between two tall boulders. The rock was dark and overgrown with ferns and other shrubs, Kai ran his hand along the cold surface. Bam Bam had pulled a blanket out of the duffle and sat down in the middle of the path; she motioned for Boom Boom and Kai to join her.

“Come sit and look up.” She grinned, and the two men did as instructed. The darkness was creeping up the mountain now, vision fuzzy as he tried to make out the rest of the path, everything became clearer when he looked up. It had been a while since he’d seen the stars so clearly and in such plentiful numbers. The last time had probably been on his last deployment when he’d been stuck in the middle of the ocean somewhere. The beauty of the night sky had been one of the few upsides of the station – it had always reminded him of home, when his mother would take him and his father out like this, to breathe in nature and bath in the starlight. Get closer to nature, she’d always say. Kai briefly closed his eyes before opening them again when he felt a hand reach for his. Boom Boom had a soft thing of a smile painted on his lips, eyes focused skyward, the pale starlight reflecting, making his brown eyes appear black like the sky itself and Kai was transfixed. His hand was warm wrapped around Kai’s.

Then Bam Bam started telling them about the stars, naming constellations and how different they were here to where she’d grown up in the city barely able to spot even one star in the sky even in the dead of night and Kai found himself unable to look away from her. She was ethereal in the night. Her hair merging with the darkness to make her one with the night as if she was its goddess; her skin took on a silvery hue in the starlight that reached them, her eyes the same dark pits of night sky as Boom Boom. She pulled out some more food boxes from the duffle and they sat in the darkening pocket of nature consuming, being. Before they knew it, the food was gone and they’d shuffled even closer, eyes turned up to the sky again or maybe they were upside down looking upon a sea of lights, it was hard to tell, as if floating in suspension.

“Thank you,” he mumbled when they had fallen silent and were just basking in the silence of night. “For taking us here.” It earned him a toothy smile, starlight making them shine brighter in the darkness, painting her lips black in comparison – she’d suit black lipstick, Kai thought before he got distracted by the warmth of Bam Bam’s fingers laced with his own.

They sat there for what felt like an eternity, suspended in darkness and starlight, three lovers in solitude, only the universe to bear witness to linked fingers, sitting cross-legged, knees bumping when they shuffled closer, shy smiles, eager eyes, whispered words into the void between them.

When eternity eclipsed into eons, Ava pulled them up to their feet, stashed the blanket in the duffle again and carefully navigated around the boulders to follow the little path. Kai followed only to suddenly have the silence cut through with the rushing sound of water. He sped up eagerly, recognising the roar of a waterfall. Ava grinned at his eagerness, and it didn’t take long until the rock fell away next to them to open up into a small clearing. A pool of dark water lay still ahead of them, the far end disturbed by the rush of water falling from the rock above. There was another natural plateau in the rock, forming a pool, before it continued up higher to where Kai could only make out the end of the canopy of trees because the stars suddenly rose out of darkness.

“Shit, that’s cold.” He heard Norman hiss, before he looked over and could make out the man having crouched down to dip his hands into the water. Ava laughed before crouching down as well, one hand in the water before she pushed it forward with force, splashing Norman who spluttered and fell backwards onto the ground. Kai joined in on Ava’s quiet laughter even as Norman sat up and hurried to the water to splash it back at her. Kai was standing close enough to her that some of the cold water hit his skin, and he hissed at the icy feeling, but the laughter never died away from his lips.

Ava had jumped up quickly and was now clutching both of Kai’s arms, hiding behind him as Norman pushed up and advanced on them.

“I’m gonna get you back for that.” He promised, tone hushed. The darkness felt sacred somehow, like they shouldn’t be too loud lest they disturb those spirits that dwelt in it. Still they moved quietly, Kai felt the heat of Ava’s body against his back, the night air now cold in contrast, and Norman was in front of him, trying to make a grab for her around him. Kai laughed as he shielded her with his body, eventually just wrapping his arms around the other man and hissing for Ava to run for it. Norman whisper-shouted something about him being a traitor until Kai silenced him with a kiss, quick and kind of dirty, and he knew he'd left Norman reeling a bit by the dazed look on his face. He laughed, feeling strangely lightweight in the night, wrapped in his arms, the ghost of Ava’s hands still on his own.

“No fair,” he heard her hiss from behind him. “Why does he get the kisses, when he’s the one out to get me?” Kai turned his head to look at her, not letting go of Norman’s warm body.

“Some princess you are.” She continued and Kai rolled his eyes.

“I- Well, come over here then, if you want one as well.” He called quietly, saw the spark of distrust in her eyes before she answered.

“I fear this princess has changed allegiances.” She held her head high and took another step back, away from them. Kai felt Norman’s arms tighten around him, his chest shaking against his own with silent laughter.

“If I come closer you will deliver me to the beast.” Norman gasped at that.

“I’m the beast?” Kai let his forehead fall to Norman’s chest as he laughed at the ridiculous argument going on around him. “You started this! If anything, I’m the innocent prince who fought back.” Ava’s laughter carried over to them, a quiet, infectious ramble, just loud enough to make out over the rushing of the waterfall and soon all three of them were dissolved into giggles. The stars watched on as the water flowed and twisted and three bodies curved around each other in inaudible laughter.

After the laughter ebbed, like it was drawn away with the water, downstream, along the mountainside to disappear in the ocean somewhere, the three of them sat quietly by the water admiring the play of reflections in the currents whirled up by the waterfall. They spoke in hushed whispers of dreams and wishes, past and future, work and leisure.

All too soon, Ava’s phone started vibrating in a silent alarm and she turned it off with a sigh.

“We gotta go if we wanna be able to make it to work in the morning.” Kai and Norman let out disgruntled noises from where they were still sat, legs tangled with hers, Norman’s fingers drawing patterns on their thighs. Kai let himself fall back onto the soft earth with a smile, before he pushed himself up, offering his hands to pull his two partners up as well.

“Thank you, princess.” Ava smiled cheekily before she pressed a kiss to his lips, silencing his repeated protests at the pet name (though if he was honest with himself, he wasn’t even that mad about it – the happy twinkle in Ava and Norman’s eyes whenever they used it was payment enough, even if it did make him blush every time).  

Ava led the way back; Kai kept his fingers tangled with Norman’s while they walked in comfortable silence. The drive back to Ava’s apartment was lively. Kai was driving, Ava in the passenger seat, one hand on Kai’s thigh, the other at the back of her neck, arm twisted so she could hold Norman’s as well, who was belting out the lyrics to whichever song came on next. The dark landscape soon grew brighter as they re-entered civilisation. It almost made Kai wish they could stay out there, in the wilderness – maybe one day, when this was all done. Maybe they could make it, the three of them, make it to retirement, then buy a shack somewhere remote, but at the coast, not inland, so that Kai and Ava could surf and Norman could watch, maybe one day he’d get the hang of the balance on the board and join them but until then, they could always take him out paddling, just float in the water, and be. Kai lost himself in the dreams while he drove.

“Good night, my loves.” Ava whispered, pulling Kai into a kiss over the console and then Norman through the seats before she left the car. Norman switched to the front and they watched on until the lights in her apartment went on before they drove off. Kai dropped Norman off soon after, another soft kiss, another short wait until he saw lights go on and then he drove off to his own place, once again lost in what could be – a day where he didn’t have to drop them off in two different flats before returning to his own, a day where they would go out and then return to the same home, laugh as they got ready for sleep, brush their teeth together, then curl up in one bed, their faces the last thing he’d see, their steady breaths the last thing he’d hear before he’d sleep and the first when he’d wake up. He sat in his car outside of his own apartment complex for a while contemplating before he went inside with a sigh.

He'd talk to them about it soon – telling others. He didn’t know how much longer he could keep all this inside. But for now, he went to sleep with musings and dreams on his mind of a future that suddenly didn’t seem too far out of reach.

***

Another two weeks passed before Kai spoke to Boom Boom and Bam Bam about telling people. They agreed to tell their families first. Telling his father went better than he’d expected. Kai knew his father was chill with him being queer but he’d never broached the topic of being poly before, so naturally a pit had opened in his stomach that refused to let him eat while serving as a constant reminder of what he had to do. But he’d borne it because the alternative was hiding yet another piece of himself from his family and he’d made a promise to himself and to them that he wouldn’t do that anymore. So, he had told his father over dinner. Wally Holman had paused, spoon mid-air and stared at his son. He’d taken in the nervous twitch to his eyes, the way he was wringing his hands in his lap and hadn’t touched his food yet, and he’d been taken back to when he was a boy and had told him he wasn’t like the other boys. So, Wally had put the spoon down and reached a hand over, resting it palm up on the table, had waited until his son let one of his own hands drop into the offering (his was clammy with sweat and shaking, Wally had noticed). He’d gripped his hand hard, reassuring in its pressure, and smiled.

“Are you happy?” He’d asked and Kai had nodded, avoiding eye contact.

“Yeah,” he’d sounded choked up, so Wally had squeezed his hand again and Kai had felt all that tension start to dissipate. “I’m happy.”

“Then that’s all that matters.” His father had squeezed his hand one more time before relaxing, allowing Kai to be the one to break contact. “Bring them ‘round next week. I wanna meet them.” He’d added and Kai had laughed, relief bleeding into every sound he made, letting his shoulders drop, he’d pulled his hand away and actually started eating.

“Tell me about them.” His father had asked, and Kai had spent the rest of the dinner torn between eating and telling his father about Ava and Norman.

(The dinner a week later went well and left Kai watching with a sappy smile that he tried to hide as his father and Ava bonded over the ocean and Norman complimented his pops’ food, and it had been a while since he’d been that content.)

On Monday, Tennant brought the solution to how Kai would break it to the team.

“We’re having a BBQ on Saturday night.” She announced as she left her office to go home. Lucy held out a hand to high-five and Kai gladly obliged. “You’re welcome any time from 1800. The estimated time for food is 2000.”

“Plus ones?” Lucy asked, phone already in hand to text Kate.

“Of course.” Tennant nodded. So, Kai took out his phone to text the group chat.

“Gonna invite Ava?” Jesse’s voice had a teasing note to it that made Kai roll his eyes.

“As a matter of fact, yes.” Kai smirked before he added. “And Norman.” His heart was in his throat as he said it. He took in the various shocked looks on the faces of his team; Jesse’s mouth hung open and his eyes were so wide and round, Kai wondered if he needed to worry about them falling out; Tennant’s face was almost too passive, Kai could read the surprise in the tilt of her head; Lucy’s eyes had also somehow got even bigger and then there was a spark of suspicion there that told Kai that she might’ve caught on but she stayed quiet.

“Ava… and Norman?” Jesse spoke slowly as if he was trying out the sound of the names. Kai nodded and waited.

“That sounds lovely,” Tennant was the next to speak. “I look forward to meeting them.” Kai felt that weight shift again, breathing suddenly a bit easier.

“Yeah, can’t wait.” Jesse finally grinned; Kai felt his heart calm down. Lucy remained silent but he could see that she was just waiting until they were alone; the woman was too smart for her own good sometimes.

Inconceivable trio

You [18:13] bbq @ tennant’s on Saturday

You [18:13] dress nice

B💥 [18:13] ooh meeting the extended family

B💥 [18:13] sign me up, princess 😘

B💣 [18:14] should we bring something?

Kai grinned down at his phone, his heart full of something he wasn’t sure he should name yet, but it ran so deep, it felt like it travelled through his body along with his blood.

“Ava and Norman, huh?” Lucy’s voice was teasing and when Kai looked up she was leaning against his desk, hip cocked, arms crossed across her chest, one brow raised.

“Yeah,” he breathed, and Lucy dropped the face, leaning forward, both hands on his desk, up in his space.

“When were you gonna tell me you’d finally told them?” She hissed. “Or that their government names are Ava and Norman?” That startled a laugh out of Kai.

“I’d honestly forgotten most people only know them by their callsigns.” He grinned. “Don’t tell the others though.” He motioned for her to come even closer with a conspirator-like twinkle in his eye.

“I was most nervous about the poly relationship thing,” he shrugged. “Now I wanna see how they react to it being them.” Lucy’s face lit up.

“You are devious, Kai Holman.” But she laughed and accepted his pinkie promise. “I love it.” Then, “but I can tell Kate, right?”

“Yeah, you can tell her.” Kai said with a smile and it was silent for a beat before Lucy spoke again.

“You look happier.” Lucy was watching him, tracing his facial expressions, the relaxed slope of his shoulders, the laugh lines that seemed somehow more prominent in the orangey light of the office.

“I am happier.” He assured her and stood up. “However, I have a dinner to get to with Ava and Norman, so please excuse me.” Lucy gave him a friendly punch to the upper arm, which Kai clutched dramatically.

“You hurt me, Tara.” She only rolled her eyes in response and walked to the elevator with him, demanding the story of how they’d finally got together.

Later, Kai promised. He’d tell her at the BBQ.

***

Saturday rolled around faster than Kai was expecting. They closed the case of a missing officer on Friday, so the BBQ felt extra needed and joyful. He let himself have the day in bed until there was a knock on his door around four in the afternoon and he frowned but moved to open it anyway.

“His oven broke.” Bam Bam pushed past him into the flat, leaving a confused Kai to look at a grumpy Boom Boom holding an oven dish covered in tin foil.

“Come in?” The words lilted like a question when they left Kai’s mouth.

“I don’t know why we offered to bring something.” Boom Boom grumbled as he made his way past Kai and straight into the kitchen, following Bam Bam.

“Because they’re also Kai’s family and we need to make a good impression.” Bam Bam responded immediately, already fiddling with the temperature settings on Kai’s oven.

“What did you make?” He stuck his head in the kitchen curiously and watched as Boom Boom carefully lifted the tin foil, revealing uncooked pastry.

“Apple pie.” He grunted and Kai hummed appreciatively. Boom Boom made apple pie following his grandma’s recipe and the couple of times he’d made it for them before, it had been truly one of the best things he’d ever eaten.

“Okay, okay,” Bam Bam straightened up and motioned for the dish. “Done, come on.” Boom Boom handed her the dish carefully and she put it on the middle tray and closed the door. “And now we wait,” she announced before reaching for a glass of water.

Kai took note of Boom Boom’s still cloudy grey mood and moved to wrap his arms around his middle, chest to his back, hooking his chin over his shoulder.

“We have time,” he mumbled as he pressed a kiss to his neck. Boom Boom covered his hands with his own and Kai felt the man relax back into him; he took his weight without a thought.

“Just a shitty day for the stupid oven to finally break.” He grumbled and Kai chuckled under his breath.

“On the plus side it means I get to have you both to myself for another couple hours before the team realises Ava and Norman are Bam Bam and Boom Boom.” That startled a laugh out of both of his partners and Kai preened with it just like he did every time he managed to make them laugh.

“I still can’t believe they never knew our actual names.” Bam Bam took a sip from her glass of water, a small smile playing around her mouth.

“It does kinda make sense,” Boom Boom shrugged, almost dislodging Kai from his shoulder. “We never go by anything but our callsigns.” Bam Bam shrugged as well and started another conversation, but Kai felt himself zoning out. There were still moments where this didn’t seem quite real, like the past two months were a dream and he’d wake up one day before all this happened, back when they were teasing him over some elephant toothpaste, his cheeks darkened with flush, stumbling over his words. He let himself drink in the sight, wanted it burned on his retinas so he would see it whenever we closed his eyes; he was tempted to take out his phone to take a picture but that felt wrong somehow. So he let his gaze wander, Bam Bam’s dark hair was highlighted with auburn-browns in the warm sunlight spilling in through the window, her face passive but Kai could spot the tiny movements of her lips and the emotions mirrored in her eyes to tell him what she was really thinking. Then Boom Boom said something funny, and she threw her head back laughing, the column of her throat on display and Kai marvelled at the sound, clear and bright, filling the room with it. He could feel Boom Boom shake with the laughter as well, his deeper voice echoed in his ear and he turned his head to bury his face in the crook of his neck. He felt a hand in his hair suddenly, recognised it to be Boom Boom and simply tilted his head into it a bit, letting the man scratch at his scalp. He wasn’t sure he’d ever been this relaxed and just… happy. Like the worries responsibilities that usually weighed heavy on his shoulders had been banished by Bam Bam’s laughter echoing in his ears and Boom Boom’s warmth radiating through his body. Kai felt a hand on his face, smaller than the one in his hair but no less calloused and he let himself be pulled forward, away from Boom Boom’s neck and shoulder. His eyes were still closed when he felt Bam Bam cradle his cheek gently, he wasn’t sure if she was saying anything, but he wasn’t sure it mattered when he felt a soft kiss be pressed to his lips. A happy hum escaped his throat and he felt more than heard Boom Boom’s chuckle even as Bam Bam’s voice finally reached him:

“C’mon, sweetheart.” The endearment sent a shiver down his spine, and he tilted his head further into her touch, tightening his arms around Boom Boom’s solid torso. “Let’s get out of the kitchen.” Bam Bam pulled the two men into the living room and arranged them on the couch. Boom Boom lay down first, stretching his legs across the curved edge of the corner sofa to provide enough space for Bam Bam to take up residence on his left and Kai on his right side.

“Did you-“ Boom Boom started but Bam Bam interrupted him.

“I set a timer, don’t worry.” She curled into him, head in the dip where his shoulder met his chest and pulled Kai down with her. He climbed over Boom Boom’s body to take up a mirrored position to Bam Bam, but he was taller, so he ended up having to throw his legs over Boom Boom, almost knocking Bam Bam off the sofa. The giggles that caught them were infectious and Kai almost didn’t want to go to the gathering anymore. This right here was all he needed. Boom Boom’s steady, rhythmic breathing, chest rising and falling, lulled him and Bam Bam into a shallow slumber.

All too soon, Bam Bam’s phone started going off with a blaring alarm. She let go of Kai’s hand to turn it off, before leaning up to press a kiss to Kai’s hair, then Boom Boom’s lips and pushed off to stretch.

“As cute as you two are,” she mumbled, and Kai heard the shutter sound of her camera go off. “We gotta get this pie out the oven, and this show on the road.” Boom Boom groaned, tightening his arms around Kai before raising them above his head to stretch as well. Truly dislodged from his napping position, Kai grumbled but pushed up as well, leaving his partners to their pie while he made his way to his room to change and get ready.

The apartment smelled heavenly, and Kai let the sounds of them milling about the kitchen wash over him before he stepped back out and joined in the chaos of leaving.

***

Tennant’s house was already filled with loud chatter and laughter by the time they pulled up in Kai’s car. Everyone was in the back garden and Kai took a deep breath in before locking eyes with Bam Bam.

“Remember they do actually know us already,” she gave his shoulder a squeeze before pulling him down to drop a kiss on his cheek. “Lead the way, princess.” Kai rolled his eyes, felt his cheeks heat up like every time and turned to help Boom Boom out of the car with the apple pie.

The door was unlocked, so Kai pushed it open, holding it for his partners and then steeled himself for the reactions. The voices got louder and the assembled group broke out into loud cheers and hellos when Kai stepped out into the garden. He was embraced first by Jesse, then Kate before Lucy wrapped her arms around his middle and squeezed him tightly.

“Are they here?” She whispered and Kai nodded just as the chatter died down, only the music still blaring in the background as if nothing had happened.

“Boom Boom?” Jesse asked, just as Ernie went:

“Bam Bam?” The two people in question stood in the doorway and Kai hurried over to them quickly.

“Um, yeah so,” he fumbled, stumbled over his words, his tongue was suddenly lead in his mouth, too big, too slow, his breath stuttered, heart sped up. Then he felt a broad, heavy hand on the small of his back and a smaller one squeezing his hand and he took a deep breath to calm himself.

“Let me introduce, Ava,” he pulled her a bit closer. “And Norman.” He felt Boom Boom step closer to his other side.

Kate and Lucy were the first to move, they hugged them and pulled them further into the garden and the circle of people there.

“Holman here finally got the guts to confess then?” Lucy snickered and Kai hid his face behind his hands with a groan.

“It was real romantic, too,” Bam Bam nudged Kai’s side. “Our weekly romcom on the tv all snuggled up on the couch and he just – blurts it out.” Lucy stared eyes wide.

“No, he didn’t!” Kai groaned again, dropping his hands though which meant he saw the money trade hands.

“CC? Ernie?” He shouted, distracting from Lucy and Bam Bam. The two of them did not have the grace to look embarrassed.

“You won me a fair bit of cash, Holman,” Chase grinned counting a couple of bills in her hand. “Ernie over here had given up on this romance when you mentioned Ava and Norman, but I held out hope.” She winked as she stashed her money. Kai looked at Boom Boom next to him for help but when the man just burst out laughing, Kai stared openly.

“They bet on us!” Kai’s outraged cry got lost in Boom Boom’s raucous laughter.

“To be fair,” Ernie started. “You weren’t exactly subtle, Kai.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Kai cursed as he looked at the faces of his gathered team, all of whom had slightly sheepish expressions on. Except for Tennant who was just smiling fondly.

“I’m very happy for you three,” she began before adding. “Kai, I will see you Monday morning in my office for the appropriate paperwork.” Kai froze, he hadn’t… thought of that, fuck. He felt like a deer in headlights, Tennant’s gaze steady and serious and Kai was about to hurry to reassure her that he would be entirely professional when a huff of laughter escaped her… then another… and another and soon she was fully laughing.

“You should have seen the look on your face,” she gasped for air before sobering a bit. “There will be some paperwork to fill out but it’s nothing serious, just something for NCIS to cover their backs, you know?” Kai exhaled forcefully and squeezed Bam Bam’s hand where it was resting in his. Then Jesse spoke.

“Are you fucking kiddin me?” Kai froze at his words, back straight, shoulder back, caught in an offensive position against the harsh words that left his friend’s mouth. He could feel the hurt like a physical wound; of all the people, he hadn’t expected…

“Boom Boom is Norman?” He had expected that follow-up even less. “I knew you were mooning after the man but I’d fully given up on you when you started talking about Ava and then, and then,” Jesse was gesturing wildly but Kai felt himself relax in increments. Jesse didn’t actually seem upset about –

“Then you told us you had two partners and for a second I though, oh okay, here we go, but then you called him Norman.” Boom Boom let out a laugh next to him and Kai felt a chuckle of his own build in his throat.

“Your name is really Norman?” He sounded incredulous and Boom Boom went to answer but Jesse was on a roll apparently because he continued.

“And Bam Bam, I mean, I just,” he paused before he sighed, running a hand over his face. “Actually, no, that one totally makes sense as well.” That startled a laugh out of everyone. Kai felt that weight shift again, so much lighter all of a sudden, and the warmth of affection for this little family they’d found for themselves lit in his chest. He looked at Boom Boom and Bam Bam who smiled at him gently and then, with a final squeeze to his hand (Bam Bam) and shoulder (Boom Boom), they all split to mingle with the rest of the team. Delicious smells were wafting off the grill in the corner and Kai felt at peace, he had family, he had love. Watching them all interact with each other so warmly, so quickly familiar, and so at ease, Kai found it hard to keep his usual stoic façade on. A sappy, happy, gooey smile graced his face which even the heated flush that took over his face when Boom Boom brought him a plate of food and dropped a kiss on his hair didn’t diminish, nor did Bam Bam taking residence on his lap when she got tired throw him off course. He had everything he never knew he needed right here and he was never going to let go.