Chapter Text
The sound of china shattering against the wall greeted Christine as she slipped into Spock's quarters. “Spock, please don't shut me out,” she pleaded as she bent to collect the shards of the bowl and wipe up the soup dribbling down the wall.
Spock let out a heavy sigh, taking his time to think over how he would respond. “It is not a thing Vulcans speak of, except perhaps to a healer or their bondmate. It is called Pon Farr.”
Christine had heard a bit about the topic from M'Benga, but she did not think it wise to reveal that now. She merely nodded to show she was listening and allowed Spock to continue in his own time.
“Vulcans are not like humans in this regard. Pon Farr is not lovemaking nor simply a few hours of aggressive sexual intercourse. It is the time of mating and it is a matter of life and death. Even more than that, it is a time when primal desires overtake even the most disciplined mind. The loss of control that results is shameful.”
She could practically feel the disgust radiating from Spock. Sending the broken dish down the disposal chute, Christine cleaned her hands and tentatively sat down next to Spock, keeping just an inch distance between their thighs. “Aren't you the one who has told me that what is necessary is never illogical? Aren't you also the one who encourages deep respect and value for life? Why is the process of creating life any different? Continuation of the species is only logical. It's not a time for shame, Spock.”
A faint smile flickered across his face. Somehow Christine always found new ways to prove that she was a worthy recipient of his most tender affections. He leaned in closer to her, letting his eyes close as his forehead rested against hers. “I burn, Christine. I burn for you. I wish for no other. But I am not free to choose in this matter.”
Christine pulled away. “What do you mean?” she asked, brows furrowed and voice hinting at fear.
“Vulcans are bonded at a young age to ensure a mate when Pon Farr presents itself. Even now, I feel her like a whisper in my mind.”
“Isn't there anything we can do? Surely you wouldn't be forced to go through with this with someone you didn't even choose for yourself.”
"T'Pau arranged this match. My father would no doubt hesitate to cross her."
"What about your mother? If anyone could convince him, it would be her."
Spock met her words with a sigh. “Perhaps, but such a bond is held sacred by my people and not severed lightly. A female may challenge the match, and I believe that T'Pring will choose to do so. What I have sensed from her is nothing but disdain for myself, my parentage, my career, my legend.” His eyes met hers with burning intensity. “I would bond with you, Christine, not matter the wishes of my clan, but I fear that without a Vulcan healer, it would harm you.”
Soft blue eyes traced Spock's face. “You could never hurt me, Spock.”
His long, lean fingers reached up to caress her cheek. “I am not yet reckless enough to attempt such a feat on my own. We are bound for Vulcan. I will speak to my mother. You will be mine, Christine, and I will be yours. When the fever overtakes me, you will be the one who holds my life. Taluhk nash-veh k'dular. I cherish thee.”
The earnestness behind his words brought tears to Christine's eyes and she clasped Spock's hand, pressing a kiss to his knuckles. “I love you, Spock.”