Actions

Work Header

Rating:
Archive Warnings:
Fandom:
Characters:
Additional Tags:
Language:
English
Series:
Part 1 of Slay the Princess: A New Hero AU
Stats:
Published:
2024-11-21
Completed:
2024-11-25
Words:
4,940
Chapters:
3/3
Comments:
4
Kudos:
26
Bookmarks:
1
Hits:
389

strixcattus is A New Hero

Summary:

-------

This is a story about betrayal, compromise, and falling down the stairs.

-------

An adaptation of A New Hero AU by @misterbrick42-slaytheprincess on Tumblr, where people get to play through their own version of Slay the Princess via tumblr posts!

-------

Notes:

Taken from the Slay The Princess: A New Hero AU

Chapter 1: https://www.tumblr.com/misterbrick42-slaytheprincess/765625797127061504/oh-this-new-au-is-deeply-intriguing-begin
Chapter 2 + Epilogue: https://www.tumblr.com/misterbrick42-slaytheprincess/767895863699881984/begin-again-ill-get-the-narrator-this-time-i

Chapter 1: strixcattus and The Princess

Chapter Text

misterbrick42-slaytheprincess strixcattus asked:Oh, this new AU is deeply intriguing! Begin! [You awaken] #a thread has been spun anew#a thread has been spun anew #a thread has been spun anew athreadhasbeenspunanew 62 notes

Chapter 1

strixcattus

and

The Princess

The Narrator

You’re on a path in the woods, and at the end of that path is a cabin. And in the basement of that cabin is a princess.

The Narrator

You’re here to slay her. If you don’t, it will be the end of the world.

  • The Princess of where, exactly? Here? Where is "here?"

The Narrator

“Here” is a path in the woods.

The Narrator

She’s the Princess of… somewhere. You wouldn’t be able to tell, considering she’s not acting like it. You know. Planning on ending the world, and all that.

  • Yeah, but Princesses aren't just created ex nihilo, you know? They have to come from somewhere. Like a kingdom. Shouldn't this responsibility fall on the people of her kingdom to stop her, if she's gone rogue?

The Narrator

If anything, wouldn’t you think the people of her kingdom are less likely to stop her? They might not know she’s doing this. Or they could even be supporting her, somehow.

  • Well, sure, if she were acting in an official capacity. But from the way you tell it, it kind of seems like she's just kind of gone off on her own, and now she's in a—
  • Hey. Why is she in a cabin?

The Narrator

If she had went off on her own, they'd just assume her missing. She wouldn't have left a note for them.

The Narrator

And she's in a cabin because SOMEONE bought enough time for a certain SOMEONE ELSE to deal with her. That someone else might be standing around getting overly semantic about details, but it's the best that someone could go.

  • Well, why couldn't the first "someone" have dealt with her, then? If they're able to lock her in a cabin, surely they could have also killed her, right?
  • I mean, it's kind of silly to drop this task on me, you know? I have no fighting skills to speak of and would feel guilty about killing an insect. And, as established, I have no idea what you're talking about when you start throwing around "princesses" and "the end of the world." Couldn't you have sent someone... I don't know. Involved?

The Narrator

Yes, I clearly could've chosen better than you.

The Narrator

Unfortunately, it is a bit late for me to go back on that choice. If you don't do this, nobody else will, and the world will end.

  • Okay, so why me, then? What selection process could you possibly have gone through to come out with me on the other end?

The Narrator

Simple. I didn't know anything about you.

  • Well, yeah, obviously; what I'm asking is, why would you choose someone you knew nothing about, as opposed to someone you did know?

The Narrator

I didn't know anything about anyone!

  • Then how did you know the Princess was going to destroy the world??

The Narrator

I mean- ugh- anyone except her.

  • Gotcha. Just keeping things accurate.
  • So… how exactly am I meant to slay her?

The Narrator

You'll find your weapon within the cabin.

  • All right. I suppose I should check it out, at any rate. But don't think we're done just because I'm heading off. I've agreed to take a look, not to do anything more just yet.
  • [Continue to the cabin]

The Narrator

One more thing. She will lie. She will cheat. She will do everything in her power to stop you from slaying her. Don't believe a word she says.

  • Got it. That I'll believe.
  • Though I was kind of figuring that if I do try to slay her, lying and cheating would be my only advantage... at least she doesn't have a voice in her head telling her I'm here to kill her. Right? This is a me thing, and not a normal thing?
  • [Enter the cabin]

The Narrator

Oh, you can lie if you please. I'm not sure you'll have the time for it, though.

The Narrator

And, yes. You're the only person with a narrator in their head.

You enter the cabin.

The Narrator

The interior of the cabin is almost entirely bare. The air is stale and musty and every surface is painted in a fine layer of dust. The only furniture of note is a plain wooden table. Perched on that table is a pristine blade.

The Narrator

That would be your weapon.

  • Cool.
  • [Pick up the blade, test its weight out, and set it back down]
  • Hey. Quick question. Or, two quick questions.
  • One: Would I be able to go back for the blade if I went down without it to check things out, and
  • Two: How much do you trust me?

You hear faint whispering. No, not whispering. A distant voice. If you focused on it, maybe you could hear it.

The Narrator

Yes, probably, and as for your second question...less then I did before you asked that question.

  • It's fine, don't worry! I just have a plan that I think would make it much easier and more safe to kill a Princess with this thing. I'm thinking I'd have to make sure I can get close, you know, which would not at first look like I'm actually going to kill her, by design...
  • [Listen to the voice]

Voice of the Opportunist

That is a great plan. You're so good at planning. It'd be far too much hassle to kill her if she knew we had the knife on us, right? Let's go in there and lower her guard a bit, you know?

The Narrator

Who is- whatever.

  • Exactly. We go down, talk to her a bit, and then, once she trusts us, we can do the killing part. Everyone's on the same page here? Good.
  • [Enter the basement, leaving the blade behind]

The Narrator

...Sure. You head down the basement stairs.

Voice of the Opportunist

Nothing's going to go wrong here!

The Narrator

As you head down the stairs, you continue to kick up more dust with every step you take, as if you're the first person to come here in a very long time.

H-hello, is someone there?

Voice of the Opportunist

Guessing that's her?

  • (Lie) "Hey! I think I'm here to save you?"

W-wait, really? Thank you! ...think?

  • "Maybe? I'd like to talk a bit first, if that's all right."
  • [Sit down next to the Princess]
  • "I was told there was a Princess locked up in this cabin, but... I wasn't really clear on why. Or by whom. Do you think there's any light you could shed on any of that?"

Voice of the Opportunist

Uh- sorry- this wasn't part of the plan.

I don't know why I'm here either. You're... the first person I can remember coming down here.

...you are here to rescue me, right?

Voice of the Opportunist

She's onto us.

  • "I'd like to. If I can trust you. And... if you're willing to trust me."
  • Relax! This is the plan!
  • "Is there a keyhole in those chains?"

Yeah... Do you have the key?

The Narrator

You don't, and it certainly won't be anywhere nearby. Whoever locked her down her never intended for her to see the light of day.

Voice of the Opportunist

I thought you locked her- ah whatever you're the boss.

  • "Not on me, no. I... don't think whoever locked you up here intended for someone to just pop in and unlock your chains. I can check upstairs and see if they dropped it or something, but..."
  • "There's no easy way to say this. Would you be willing to lose a hand for your freedom? Because they did leave a blade up there."

The Narrator

The Princess's eyes widen in shock, but then look back down at her own hand.

I guess so.

Voice of the Opportunist

Too easy.

  • Maybe. But if you'd been locked up for who knows how long, you'd be willing to make some pretty hefty sacrifices to get out, wouldn't you?
  • "Right. I'll check for the key, but... failing that, I'll grab the blade."
  • [Head back up the stairs]

The Narrator

You return to the upper floor of the cabin.

The Narrator

No key.

Voice of the Opportunist

Aw noooo! Now we're gonna have to cut her out! A shame, really.

  • Well. No surprises here.
  • [Take the blade]
  • [Take a couple minutes to look around the cabin anyway for appearance's sake]
  • [Head back to the stairs]
  • "Coming with a blade."

The Narrator

You return down the stairs, blade in hand.

Let me do it.

Voice of the Opportunist

No, I think we got it. Right?

  • "You're sure? I think I'd have better leverage using both hands."

No. I can do it.

The Narrator

The Princess is eyeing you.

Voice of the Opportunist

I think we've tilted our hand.

  • ...Yeah. We might've.
  • Rather fortunate I didn't particularly buy into this 'slay the Princess to save the world' stuff from the beginning, isn't it? I mean, come on. Can't even tell me where she's from? At least try to get your story straight before dragging me into it.
  • Which we will be having words about, if I get the chance after this.
  • "All right, then. If you're sure."
  • [Slide the blade across the floor to the Princess]

The Narrator

Wait, what?

Voice of the Opportunist

Oh, but of course! I never had any intent to slay her. Sorry about that.

The Narrator

The Princess cuts herself out, and lets her chain, and her hand fall to the floor.

Thank you. Let's get out of here.

  • "Yeah. ...You've still got the blade?"
  • [Turn towards the stairs]

She didn't hear you. Nobody heard you.

The Narrator

The Princess walks in front of you as- no! Fine, you want to play dirty? Let's play dirty.

The Narrator

You find the blade in hand, ready to pierce it through the Princess's heart.

Voice of the Opportunist

What I meant to say was I never didn't have any intent to slay her. Sorry about that.

  • Sore losers, aren't we? I guess we all have that in common.
  • "Princess! Look out!"

Voice of the Opportunist

What I MEANT to say was- can we make up our minds here already, guys?

What are you- *gasp*

The Narrator

The Princess dodges just as you strike. The blade. Move. The. Blade.

  • All right, screw it. Something tells me this isn’t going to be the end of things anyway.
  • “Really sorry about this!” [Attack the Princess]

The Narrator

She dodges again, but this time you strike flesh.

A betrayal of will is still a betrayal. You'll regret this.

Voice of the Opportunist

If I knew you weren't going to finish her off I wouldn't have done that.

The Narrator

She bounces on you with an animal-like ferocity. You try to stop her with your blade, but it's not enough. She tears through your chest and tears you apart with her somehow sharp teeth. You collapse to the floor, your body unresponsive. She stares at you, showing no sympathy.

I knew I shouldn't have trusted you. Shame on me for letting my guard down.

Voice of the Opportunist

Well I know who's fault this is.

The Narrator

Yes, but it's too late for that. Everything goes dark, and you die.

misterbrick42-slaytheprincess strixcattus asked:“Really sorry about this!” [Attack the Princess] [This thread has been cut. Begin again to continue.] #a thread has been cut#a thread has been cut #a thread has been cut athreadhasbeencut 62 notes