Chapter Text
Neil didn't really expect much from Seth, but he did from Allison. So, when both of them walked in on the first day where the team would be complete, he almost lost his composure. What the hell was his dead older brother doing there? He was the suicidal one of the two, but maybe he was like Neil, tired of running. Maybe he was there waiting for their father, or...
"What the hell are you looking at, idiot?" His gray eyes met Neil's fake browns ones. Neil tried to find some recognition in his gaze.
All he found was a furious look, one that had never been directed at him when he was a child. For his father? Sure. For his mother? Sometimes. But for him? Never. Caleb always had a soft spot for him. After each "lesson" from their father, he would hug him all night and they would talk about the future they dreamed of having, one far from Nathan and Mary, far from Romero, Lola, and Jackson, away from the teachers who stopped caring about their health when their phone rang indicating a new transaction.
But Neil understood the reason for not recognizing his face. The last time he saw him was when he was 12 years old and blonde. At that time, he still didn't wear contact lenses or makeup sometimes to fake different features. Anyway, Neil looked away from him and tried to focus on something else. It wasn't that hard when Allison approached him and, with an exhausted analysis, simply proclaimed:
"I'm sitting with you," and then proceeded to sit on the arm of the sofa. That place wasn't big enough for her, so she ended up almost entirely on him. Neil noticed her skirt riding up in his peripheral vision, but he never took his eyes off Allison's.
"If you want to sit here, I can move," but she shook her head.
"No, I'm fine like this." Seth was looking at both of them with almost uncontrollable rage that, again, had never been directed at him before, despite wanting to run to him and hug him with all his might. "Is this going to take long? I'm exhausted from the flight and want to rest."
Wymack raised an eyebrow. "You are the ones delaying us," without leaving room for a response and pointing at him, he continued, "this is Neil Josten, our new substitute forward, anything to add?" Neil shook his head. "You already know the rest, these are Allison, our central defender, and Seth, our starting forward. Questions? Doubts?"
"I have a fucking question," Seth pointed at Neil. Wymack pretended not to hear him and continued.
"Great, now, Abby?" The nurse got off the furniture and handed out papers to everyone.
"They're the same boring forms as always. Sign on the lines and hand them to me first thing tomorrow morning. You won't be able to train until I have them filed." With that, she sat back down.
"Summer training starts at eight-thirty. Enjoy being able to sleep in while you can, because we switch to six when the semester starts. See you in the gym. I repeat, see you in the gym. If you're late because you thought it was here, I'll kick you in the face. You've only been gone a month. I know perfectly well that you know how this works." Her severe look left no room for questioning.
"Yes, coach," they all said at the same time.
"You have to get a medical check-up before you leave. Andrew, you're first. Seth, you're second. The rest can draw straws or whatever. Do as you like, but don't even think about leaving before Abby has examined you." He looked at Andrew badly. He and Nicky smiled innocently; no one believed their little act.
While the conventions continued, Neil wondered why Seth was the second most important to check, but he saved the question for later. He doesn't know at what point the conversation escalated to the point where Seth and Nicky were already arguing.
"Death threats were original, at least," Nicky contributed with a mocking smile. "Still, this time someone might actually follow through and kill one of us. Let's vote. I nominate Seth." That earned a subtle glare from Neil and an insult from Seth.
"Go to hell, faggot." His gaze shifted from Nicky to Seth, surprised; he had never said anything like that before.
"I don't like that word," Andrew said. "Don't use it."
"I would have said 'go to hell, weirdo,' but you wouldn't have known which one of you I was talking to." Well, that did sound a bit more like the old Seth.
"I'd rather be a weirdo who remembers his life before he was 16," Nicky mocked with irony in his voice.
So that was it, his brother had lost his memory and now didn't remember that he even existed. Caleb was 16 when he sacrificed himself for his brother and mother, giving them time to run from their father and his henchmen. He didn't remember the sleepless nights he spent guarding his younger brother's sleep or the days playing Exy in secret from their father for fear he would take away the only thing they liked. His brother was lost, but Neil wasn't sure he wanted to bring him back. Despite loving him, he seemed to have created a good life in this place, and at least here he had Allison and the other Foxes, despite how poorly they seemed to get along. Nathan thought Caleb was dead, and Neil didn't plan to declare him alive without Caleb even knowing who he was.
...
He took the first opportunity he had to return to the apartment just to relax and smoke while evading all the day's thoughts. Would Seth remember at some point close to his imminent death? Or would he live in ignorance forever? He wished he could go back in time and prevent the memory loss; he wanted his older brother back, no matter how childish it sounded.
The first thing he heard from Seth when he arrived at the apartment were his angry words against him. Anyway, he tried to be as peaceful as possible for the rest of the night, still not knowing exactly what to do about the situation.