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Sam was afraid to ask for it when hallucinations about Lucifer and his mental trauma from the cage were finally gone with Cas’ help.
***
Despite his anger at Dean he yearned for it, when Gadreel was finally out of his body but felt like he didn’t deserve it for what he’d done to Kevin.
***
It all came to a boiling point when a particularly strong malevolent spirit rode his bones during the last hunt in an abandoned mansion. He ended up stabbing himself with an old rusty iron poker because the spirit, using Sam’s body to do so, had successfully disarmed and knocked out Dean. The ghost stabbed a little too deep though and Sam started feeling woozy from blood loss. He stumbled over to where Dean lay unconscious, right next to the dresser Sam, without being in charge of his body, had thrown him into with ghost-amplified strength.
Using the last of his reserves Sam grabbed and lit up the hair in the golden locket that Dean had still held clasped tightly in his hand, which sent the soul of the man that had haunted the place for four decades, heavenward.
***
Sepsis was a close thing if it weren’t for Dean’s quick action and taking Sam to hospital. Sam was in and out of consciousness, while Dean stayed with him the entire time until they could finally make their way home. He didn’t dare ask for it while in the hospital room though.
***
A few days later sitting in the Impala on the drive home to the bunker, the position couldn’t have been better. He feigned falling asleep against the window at first and waited until Dean had to take a left turn. Dean was a careful and considerate driver and there was no way Sam would ever experience enough centrifugal force to accidentally tip over against his brother’s side. But he couldn’t handle it anymore, all he wanted was to feel another human being, feel the body head of someone else against himself and relish the comfort that would bring.
In a poor attempt at acting, he faked tipping over toward Dean, who had his right arm stretched out along the backrest of the bench seat. Dean let out a shocked huff of air and indulgent warm chuckle, the vibrations of which rolled through his torso. Sam's head was nuzzled into Dean’s throat and he let out a soft sound when Dean’s fingers carded through his hair before his arm wrapped around him. Sam fell asleep like that; safe, cared-for and protected.
When he woke, not only was Dean still in the car with him, he was fast asleep also. His head tilted toward Sam’s as he snored lightly. Perhaps he could ask for this after all? All Sam wanted was physical affection from the person he trusted the most. Have soft fingertips run through his hair and gently rub his neck, telling him things were going to be okay because he truly wasn’t okay right now. A smacking of lips and jump-shiver ran through Dean’s frame before he greeted Sam with a raspy: “Hey cuddle-bug, feeling better?”