Chapter Text
”You told me I’m the love of your life about a million times.”
Choso never understood the thrill of this love humans spoke of. It seemed exhausting, having to deal with a needy person, constantly begging for you to pay attention to them.
It wasn’t something Choso was interested in.
That was until he met Yuji’s teacher, Satoru Gojo.
He hadn’t seen such striking eyes before—the kind that’d leave you breathless with a single glance from them. That’s exactly what Satoru did to Choso.
He was even more surprised when Satoru strode up to him and simply said, “We’re going out tomorrow. Right before sunset. Deal?”
Choso didn’t have the courage to reject the offer. He really didn’t want to, anyway. It was a once in a lifetime opportunity. No one would ever have interest in someone like him. He was… unlovable.
Of course, he felt guilt for being in love with Yuji’s sensei. It was probably so awkward for the poor boy. He never exactly objected to their relationship, though.
It had been five months, twenty-one point seven weeks, and one-hundred and fifty-two days since their first kiss.
Choso remembered it vividly and he wondered if Satoru did, too.
It was passionate and sweet, but the faint whisper of overthinking told him Satoru was holding back in the kiss.
Over time, that once inaudible voice that was the intrusive thoughts became louder. It turned into murmurs, then talking, and then that talking turned into overwhelming shouts of distrust and anger towards Satoru.
Why?
Choso liked to think he had a good reason.
Satoru had been mistaking Choso for his late lover, Suguru Geto.
At first it was little things.
You know, the occasional slip-up of names or accidentally forgetting that Choso’s favorite color was, in fact, not lilac, but rather a deep maroon that symbolized lust, anger, strength, and blood.
Choso didn’t mind it at first. He honestly thought it was normal. He knew how much Satoru had loved Suguru.
But then, it got worse.
Choso had seen Satoru scrolling through old photos of Suguru. He knew he’d never be him, and despite Satoru’s claims of being over his ‘friend’, Choso was smart enough to know that was a boldface lie.
Choso tried to be a little more Suguru. He really did. It was just too exhausting. But then again, he found everything exhausting—that’s what Satoru said, anyway.
After what felt like the hundredth time he caught Satoru longing for the past, Choso said something.
“Satoru.” He began as he sat next to Satoru on the fluffy couch in his abnormally large living room.
”Hmm?” Choso watched Satoru switch the screen to something that was supposed to be his work.
”Do you..” The death painting swallowed his fears. He felt the anxiety bubble up in his stomach like a bad piece of food.
”Do you love me?”
A beat of silence went by.
Satoru’s patronizing scoff made Choso’s already fragile heart break a bit more.
”That’s a stupid question.” The white-haired man crossed his arms over his chest and spread his legs a bit more. “‘Course I d–“
”Really.” Choso interrupted. “Do you really love me? Please don’t lie.”
Satoru was honestly offended. How dare Choso question his love and loyalty? Did he not make it obvious enough?
”I do love you.” He huffed. “You’re stupid if you really think I don’t. You know what, Cho? I think it’s funny how–“
”Well, I can’t tell you do.” Choso let out a soft, shaky breath. “You always confuse me with Geto… and-and it hurts me more than you could understand, Satoru..”
The hoarseness in Choso’s voice made Satoru feel both frustration and an immense amount of guilt.
”You’re kidding, right?” Satoru asked, completely serious. “It’s just a force of habit.”
You’re overthinking it.” Satoru quickly claimed. “Just like you do everything else.”
Choso’s frame cowered a bit. Maybe he was right. Maybe Choso was being crazy.
”What, is it a crime to miss my best friend?”
Choso quickly shook his head. “That’s not what I’m saying..”
”That’s what it seems like.”
Satoru knew what he was doing. He was manipulating Choso, but it was only a little bit. He didn’t want him to catch on. He was a good replacement for Suguru.
”Satoru, you just don’t understand.” Choso cut himself off, biting back a sob.
”I don’t wanna understand. You’re being crazy! I can’t even look at another man’s pictures without you getting all apprehensive.”
”I’m not getting apprehensive, I’m asking a question.”
Satoru rolled his eyes. “I don’t wanna talk to you about this. We’re just goin’ in circles.”
Choso clenched his fists.
”Fine.”
Ever since that quarrel, Choso had been distant. He wasn’t as affectionate. He wasn’t as clingy. It felt odd to Satoru. He was used to having Choso right next to him at all times.
Meanwhile, Choso had been building up the bravery to break up with Satoru. It was far more difficult than he had imagined it to be. He cried an embarrassing amount of times while preparing his words.
Choso decided the best place to end their relationship was the same spot they had their first kiss—the courtyard of Jujutsu High, half an hour after classes had been dismissed.
Choso tensed when Satoru sat next to him. He figured he wouldn’t have taken the time out of his oh-so busy day to see him.
Satoru seemed to sense something was wrong.
”Somethin’ wrong?” Satoru inquired. ”No.” Choso replied, his voice flat and void of any emotion.
Satoru waited for Choso to spit out whatever he needed to.
”I think.. I..” He hesitated.
”We need to break up.”
It felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off Choso’s shoulders.
”What?” Satoru sounded so dumb. A sense of pride flared up in Choso.
Choso didn’t have much else to say. He nodded, as if to solidify his declaration, then got on his way. Satoru watched from underneath his blindfold as Choso stood up and simply walked away.
Satoru Gojo had just been broken up with.
Satoru Gojo had just been broke up with.
He gritted his teeth.
Even at twenty-eight years old, Satoru was still a prideful man. He hated it when his ego took blows.
He’d let Choso think he had his little victory, but there was no escaping the all-knowing Satoru.
Not for long, anyway.
Satoru was not letting Choso get away for too long. They were going to finish what they had started.