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1. I swear that I love you. by ClownCar420

   Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, Minecraft (Video Game)  

   • Mature
   • Graphic Depictions Of Violence
   • F/M, M/M
   • Complete Work

   03 Dec 2024

   Tags

   • Graphic Depictions Of Violence
   • EthosLab/Joel | SmallishBeans
   • Joel | SmallishBeans/Lizzie | LDShadowLady
   • Joel | SmallishBeans
   • EthosLab (Video Blogging RPF)
   • Lizzie | LDShadowLady (Video Blogging RPF)
   • Dissociation
   • Blood and Injury
   • Blood Loss
   • Suicidal Thoughts
   • Suicide Attempt
   • Memory Loss
   • Repressed Memories
   • Childhood Memories
   • Childhood Trauma
   • Psychological Trauma
   • Trauma
   • Joel | SmallishBeans-centric
   • Married Joel | SmallishBeans/Lizzie | LDShadowLady
   • Joel | SmallishBeans Angst
   • Protective Lizzie | LDShadowLady (Video Blogging RPF)
   • Protective EthosLab (Video Blogging RPF)
   • Self-Harm
   • Motorcycles
   • Near Death Experiences
   • Violent Thoughts
   • author is venting again
   • Mental Health Issues
   • Mental Instability
   • Altered Mental States

   Summary

   They wouldn’t say it, but Joel could see it: the weariness in their eyes. The exhaustion of loving someone who didn’t want to be loved, who didn’t even want to exist. It wasn’t their fault. They’d tried so hard, too hard, to save him from himself.

   But Joel knew—knew—he was already lost. 

   Series

   • Part 5 of 101 ways to commit suicide with Joel

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   5,801

   Chapters:

   1/1

   Comments:

   1

   Kudos:

   104

   Bookmarks:

   5

   Hits:

   911