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Donna had gotten used to being courted. Even as a teenager, several boys had shown interest in her, resulting in more than one prom invitation. She also already had boyfriends since she was sixteen, and although she had more or less serious relationships with more or less decent guys, she had never really had anything to complain about. Of course, she was a woman, so she had experienced catcalls on the street, unkind remarks, disrespectful innuendos, and sometimes inappropriate gestures — unfortunately, the daily reality for many women. Usually, she ignored these comments, especially since she started working for Harvey. In fact, she had been working for the lawyer for ten years now, and as soon as she was transferred to his desk, the rumors began, mostly implying that she was sleeping with her boss. Most people were incapable of understanding that a friendship between a boss and an employee — or even a man and a woman — was possible, no matter how complex their relationship might be in reality. She was used to the misogynistic nuisances and paid them no mind, but talking about Elijah Anderson, she had a bad feeling about him.
« Change of plan »
« What? » asked Donna.
« Elijah Anderson »
« What about him? »
« Call him and let him know I won't be at the office at six, ask him to come at six-thirty instead »
« Oh, alright »
« Thanks, Donna. I have a meeting with the CEO of Pharmatech, but I'll be back in time »
« Please, yeah »
As he looked at her with his smirk, Donna was torn between melting in front of his handsome face, irritated that he didn’t understand how rude his client was, and being scared of facing him without Harvey being around. Usually, when the lawyer was close, it didn’t allow this client to get too bold with the redhead, but as soon as Harvey's back was turned, he didn’t hesitate to openly flirt with her to the point of making her uncomfortable, without caring about how she could feel. As the hours ticked by and Donna couldn’t help but check the time every five minutes, she felt her heart race as she saw it was already quarter past six and the man would be arriving soon, praying Harvey would be back before then. But as the redhead typed a report on her computer, she felt a shiver run down her spine when she heard a deep voice echoing in front of her.
« Miss Paulsen »
« Mr. Anderson. Didn't your secretary inform you? Your appointment has been pushed to six-thirty. Mr. Specter isn't back yet »
« Oh I know, but I couldn’t miss the occasion to see you without that vulture hovering around you »
« In the meantime, I suggest you settle into Mr. Specter's office while you wait »
« I prefer to stay here. Where I can see you »
Unsure of what to say, she refocused on her computer while he continued to stare at her, making small grunting noises that made Donna want to vomit. Meanwhile, the redhead nervously bounced her knee, glancing at the clock, praying that Harvey would arrive soon to free her from this disgusting pig.
« Did I tell you how beautiful you were? »
No answer. So as she kept typing on her keyboard, he continued to look at her viciously before chuckling and whispering.
« I know you can hear me »
« I’m busy working, Mr. Anderson »
As Donna continued to stare at her computer, glancing at the corner of the screen, biting her lip while she speeded up her finger movements on the keyboard, a sour taste in the back of her throat as she felt the anxiety rising, repeating « come quickly, please » over and over again in her head until she tensed as she felt the hand of the man who was now leaning on her cubicle resting on her jaw, his thumb sliding over her chin, over her lower lip as Donna remained frozen. But the moment she felt the client’s thumb force its way into her mouth, she quickly pulled back with her eyes wide, completely frightened by the man in front of her as she heard him chuckling.
« Don't be a prude with me, Miss Paulsen. Seeing those sexy little dresses you wear, I can't believe you don't do it to turn men on. Maybe it doesn't appeal to your boss, although I suspect that Harvey must have fucked you a few times when the urge struck him. Too bad, if I were in your place, I would enjoy you all the time, even forgetting my work while you would have been on your knees under my desk doing wonders with your mouth while — »
« Donna? »
At that moment, the redhead was torn between sighing in relief or crying in frustration. But as the client straightened up as if nothing had happened, extending his hand to greet Harvey, who was completely oblivious to what had just occurred, she remained frozen when Elijah Anderson gave her a cold, threatening look, almost as if to warn her to stay quiet. Meanwhile, Harvey looked at Donna strangely, noticing the shine in her eyes. Before she had the chance to say anything, the businessman quickly cut her off and began speaking.
« Mr. Specter, I arrived a little earlier than expected »
« I can see that. Is everything alright? »
« Sure. I was just talking to your secretary about how pleasant it must be to work with you. Your seriousness and self-control are admirable »
« Alright, I'm not sure I understand, but let's go, I don't have much time » sighed Harvey.
As Harvey entered his office, the businessman followed him, throwing one last look at the secretary, full of innuendo and so perverse that the redhead shivered. Once the two men were in the other room, the door closed, and Donna quickly grabbed her purse before running to the nearest bathroom and rummaging through it with trembling hands for what she needed. She first grabbed her small travel toothbrush to quickly scrub her teeth and her almost bloody gums, then grabbed a wipe to aggressively pass it over her jaw, chin, and lips, her foundation fading to make way for her pale skin, now red from scrubbing, before she looked at herself in the mirror, still a little shocked.
She was sure that she had been able to erase all traces of the man, and yet, she had the feeling of still feeling the man's thumb trying to force the passage of her lips. After taking a deep breath, she reapplied her makeup and put her lipstick before leaving the bathroom and returning to her desk. As they were still engaged in conversation, Donna sighed as she checked the time. It was 6:23, and it was already dark outside, she just wanted to go home. She still had things to do, but not to the point that she couldn’t go back to her place, however, she knew Harvey would need her after his meeting, so she patiently waited for it to end. While sitting at her desk, continuing to type on her keyboard, she saw Norma walking in the distance.
« Norma, hey »
« Donna »
« What are you doing? I thought you couldn't move with your hip? »
« Well, Louis needs a document from the IT department, and I have to go get it »
« Leave it, I'll go myself »
« Are you sure? »
« Yeah. I still have to wait until Harvey is done with his client. What exactly do you need? »
After Norma had given her instructions, Donna hurried downstairs a few floors, where the documents were ready for Louis, before heading back up to the sixtieth floor, hoping Elijah Anderson would have already left. As she heard the sound indicating she was on the right floor, she stepped out of the elevator, her eyes still fixed on the document, not looking up until she bumped into a chest, feeling herself being pushed back inside, the redhead gasping when she saw who was standing in front of her.
« It's like fate, we keep running into each other »
« Mr. Anderson » whispered the redhead.
« The one and only »
« Sorry, I have to go out. Mr. Specter is waiting for me »
« Wait a moment »
As he tried to put his arm out to stop her from going through, Donna hurried out of the elevator, but the businessman wrapped his fingers around the redhead's delicate wrist to stop her, the secretary blocking the doors with her foot, praying that Harvey wouldn't come to save her.
« Hey, don't run »
« I have to go »
« Not until we have a chance to talk »
« I don't have time, I need to — »
« You need to come see my apartment, we could go for a drink too. At my place, of course »
« I’m not interested »
« Well, you say that now, but once you taste it, you'll become addicted to me »
As he tightened his grip on her wrist, Donna pulled firmly, exiting the elevator before whispering in a trembling voice.
« You are a fucking pig, and in no life will I accept an invitation from you. You disgust me, and you will never address me again, fucking asshole »
Donna had barely finished speaking when the elevator doors closed, and the redhead sighed, relieved to no longer see him. She then went to Norma to give her her document, talking for more than half an hour with her to try to change her mind, before returning to the lawyer’s office, who had just hung up.
« Harvey, I — »
« Not now, Donna »
« Look, we really need to talk about Elijah — »
« I said not now »
« Why not? »
« I have other things to think about »
« It’s important »
« And I don’t give a shit, alright? »
She could tell he was angry, probably because of the phone call he had just received, but at that moment, it wasn’t just him, and she really needed to talk to him. She probably wasn't going to explicitly explain everything Elijah Anderson had said or done to her, but she still wanted to let him know that she didn't feel comfortable and needed Harvey to be there when he was around. However, it was clear that the lawyer didn’t want to talk about it. As she tried one last time to speak to him, seeing him wave her off as if to say « forget about it », she sighed. She was tired of being treated like she was nothing, of being spoken to badly, especially by Harvey, the one person she expected more from. So, seeing him not care, she sighed once again angrily before murmuring.
« Fuck you. Well, you know what, I don’t need you, I’ll handle myself as usual. Good night, Harvey »
Without waiting for a response from him, she left the office, grabbed her bag, jacket, hurried off the floor, and took the elevator to the ground floor. After greeting the security guards, she pushed open the glass door of the building to get out, and as she would have usually taken a taxi home, feeling the fresh air on her face, she decided to walk part of the way to clear her head, taking a direct right to reach 53rd. But as she passed the alley where the building stored the trash, she felt a hand over her mouth and her entire body pulled into darkness.
« What an idiot »
Almost an hour ago, after his meeting with Elijah Anderson, as soon as the lawyer was left alone in his office, his phone began to ring, and the name Marcus appeared on the screen. If a call from his brother in the evening was always a bad omen, he never expected this. Once again, his brother had messed up, owed money to some guys, and was turning to him for help — again. And if Harvey didn't want to give in, when Marcus brought up the argument that he never wanted to help him and that right now, he was as selfish as Lily had been back then, Harvey completely lost it. So when Donna showed up minutes later, he was already angry, but he never should have spoken to her like that, especially when she seemed so off. As she left his office, he took a few seconds to breathe before setting off to look for her, only to miss her. He had to wait for the next elevator to go down. When he got to the ground floor and couldn’t find her anywhere, he went outside, but there was no sign of the redhead. Weird, she couldn’t have just vanished like that.
As he sighed and pulled out his phone to call her, he was startled by the sound of a ringtone coming from somewhere nearby, the exact same as hers. He followed the sound, walking toward it, until he spotted something shining on the ground. A Gucci 222 Fanny Rose. He would have recognized that golden lipstick tube Donna always left lying around her desk everywhere. In an instant, it felt as if his heart had stopped beating, and as he approached cautiously, he heard a muffled voice, freezing in place at the sight before him. Harvey had never been so scared in his life, but seeing Donna's bag on the ground, its contents scattered everywhere, while her jacket was thrown vulgarly, not far from a stiletto, he swallowed hard at the sight of her. Pinned against a wall in the dark alley, Donna had the man's hand around her neck as she was gasping, her own hands trying to free herself as the bottom of her dress had been cut with the knife the man held in his other hand.
In a split second, Harvey had his fist in the man's face, who fell to the ground unconscious, letting go of the redhead, who fell on her knees, both hands on the ground, coughing and gasping for air as the lawyer lost what little reason he had left, not caring if the guy lived or not, understanding that he had just beaten his client. If he stared at the unconscious man for a few seconds, it was hearing Donna cough behind him that brought him back to reality. Quickly, he turned, discovering Donna still on her knees, trying to catch her breath as he approached her, but the moment the redhead felt the movement near her, she suddenly backed away until she reached the wall behind her, panicking while Harvey whispered.
« It’s me. Hey, it’s just me »
As she took a deep breath, her eyes filled with tears and her lip quivering, he approached slowly, whispering.
« It's just me, breathe, everything's okay. I'm here, you’re alright »
While Harvey was focused only on the redhead in front of him, breathing with her to try to calm her down, he took advantage of a passerby to shout.
« Hey, call an ambulance »
As the man complied, Harvey refocused on the redhead before whispering.
« I’m sorry, I should have never let you go out alone. I should have listened to you and not yelled at you, fuck, I hate myself, I'm just a fucking asshole »
« Harvey » gasped Donna.
« Hey, it's fine. I promise that he will never hurt you again, neither him nor anyone else, I promise you that I will always be there for you, alright? Please, calm down, I'm here »
For a few more minutes, Donna was curled up against the wall, her gaze frozen, and Harvey crouched in front of her, not even daring to touch her, trying to comfort her until they heard the sirens from afar, a sign that the ambulance was arriving on the place. If his attention was focused on her and her only, when a series of paramedics arrived, without taking his eyes off Donna, he spoke.
« I hit him and he fell »
« And you? »
« I’m fine »
« And you, ma'am? »
As the paramedic approached her, Harvey intervened directly, whispering.
« Don't come near her »
« Of course. I'll go get a female caregiver »
« Thanks »
As they tended to the unconscious man lying next to them, the moment where the woman turned on her flashlight to point out different areas of Donna’s body and see the damage, Harvey got up quickly to vomit in a nearby trash can when he saw the bruises on her body. He then heard in the distance the woman explaining to Donna that they were going to take her to the hospital so she could do some tests, and the moment she whispered his name, he approached, took off his jacket before slipping it around her shoulders, and crouched down in front of her.
« Let’s go, alright? »
As she nodded, he held out his hand to give her the choice to take it or not, and as she took it with a shaking hand, he helped her up, feeling like he was going to get sick again as he saw the bruises forming on her knees from her fall while she seemed unsteady on her feet. Seeing her completely frozen, he approached, whispered a simple « jump » and the redhead understood. In a split second, she wrapped her arms around his neck, jumped to wrap her legs around his waist while he hugged her tightly, heading towards the police car, Harvey refusing to let anyone touch her except him, feeling the redhead's tears flow down his neck.
The last time he had carried her like that, he was taking her to her room while they were getting ready to live the best night of their lives, he would never have thought that it would happen again, and especially not like this. That's how he got into the car, the redhead still safely against him until he reached the hospital, where he put her down for the first time, their hands never parting. In a split second, both of them found themselves in a room where a police officer entered to talk to the redhead, who was still frozen in her chair.
« Miss Paulsen, I'm Officer Santiago, and I'm going to take your statement. Do you want to press charges? »
« Seriously, is that a question? You saw her, of course she's going to press charges against that son of a bitch » growled Harvey.
« Mr. Specter, I'm going to ask you to step outside while I question Miss Paulsen, and we also take pictures of the injuries »
« No way, I'm not leaving her alone »
« Mr. Specter »
« Donna » whispered the lawyer with a trembling voice.
« He can stay, it's alright »
« Alright. Miss Paulsen, did you recognize the man who attacked you? »
« Yeah. Elijah Anderson »
« Do you know him? »
« Not personally, but he's my boss's client »
« You mean Mister Specter? »
As she watched the lawyer, she saw him pacing back and forth in the room, running his hands over his face and scalp, almost pulling his hair out, while his jaw was clenched tighter than ever before, a clear sign that he was stressed and angry.
« Yes »
« And did anything else happen with him today before you were attacked? »
As she swallowed hard, Harvey understood. This guy had crossed the line before, and especially today — it was probably why she wanted to talk to him. But instead, he had just pushed her away, not letting her speak. In that moment, he was just angry — angry at that man, at the world, but mostly angry at himself. Letting that feeling take over, he punched the wall several times before the cop stopped him, and the interrogation with the redhead continued.
« So you dealt with him today? »
« Yeah »
« What happened? »
« He had a meeting at the firm, and we had to reschedule it because of a timing conflict, but he showed up much earlier, and Harvey still hadn't returned. I offered to let him sit in the office, but he preferred to stand there in front of me. At first, he started making advances, but I’m used to that, it happened every time we met each other. Then, he started insinuating that I dressed to excite him and that Harvey was lucky to have me as a secretary, saying that if he were in his place, he would take advantage of it — well, he would take advantage of me »
« Miss Paulsen, what about the rest? Has he ever gone further than words? Because I can see there's something else right now »
« It's my fault, I should have pushed him away but I was paralyzed »
As the redhead had just whispered these words in a trembling voice, Harvey tensed, and his breath caught as he imagined the worst scenarios while the police officer looked at Donna, who continued to speak.
« He put his hand on my jaw and slid his thumb on my chin, my lower lip, and I don't know, I was so scared that my body didn't move anymore, and then I felt him press on my lip to slide his thumb in my mouth, and I moved away when I realized what he was busy doing. It was after that that he started telling me that I shouldn't be a prude and that he would have taken advantage if I was his secretary »
As soon as the explanation was finished, Harvey pushed open the adjacent door before the two women heard him vomit again and again, the police officer turned to Donna, taking advantage of the fact that they were alone to speak to her in a soft voice.
« Is Mr. Specter more than your boss? »
« It's complicated »
« He's your boyfriend or something? »
« Let’s say he’s just my boss »
« Alright »
The police officer didn’t need to investigate further, they were boss and employee. But she had seen how the lawyer had never left her side, the fear in his eyes, the way she clung to him, refusing to let him go, or the way the man reacted whenever he learned something new, guilt eating him up inside. As they heard the retching next door, indicating that Harvey had finished vomiting, the woman saw Donna wipe away a tear that had slipped out before she whispered softly.
« Are you okay? »
As he quickly nodded, clearly not okay at all, the woman turned back to the redhead before questioning her again.
« What else happened? »
For nearly twenty minutes, Donna described every inappropriate word and gesture the man had made over time, with Harvey growing more and more nauseous, realizing this had been going on for a while and that she had been facing it all alone. When she finished, the officer took a deep breath before speaking.
« Look, I know it’s not nice, but I’m going to have to take pictures for the file. Okay? »
« Sure » whispered Donna.
As the woman turned on more lights to brighten the room, Harvey swallowed hard as she pulled out her phone and began to speak in a soft voice.
« Your hands »
As she stretched her arms out, fingerprints were already appearing around her wrists, the redness of the bruises contrasting with her pale skin, making Harvey want to vomit again.
« Alright, can you clear your neck? »
This time, she lifted her hair, revealing her thin, delicate neck, the fingerprints all the more pronounced as Harvey recalled the way the man had held her against the wall. After the few pictures, Donna let her hair fall before hearing the woman whisper.
« Anything else? »
Without Harvey even having time to turn around, she slightly lifted the hem of her dress to reveal the top of her thighs. And while there were no handprints, much to Harvey's relief, her pale skin contrasted with fine pink lines and a small gash on the outside of her right leg, all small marks left by the knife used when Elijah had torn the bottom of her dress. Once again, the cop took a few pictures before looking at Donna.
« Do we need to do another test? »
« No »
« Miss Paulsen, it’s — »
« He didn’t do anything to me, well, not like that. Harvey got here first »
« Alright. That’s all for us then »
« Officer, can you stay with her while I get her some more clothes? »
« Mr. Specter, you can’t leave the room »
« Why? »
« The man who attacked Miss Paulsen, Elijah Anderson, is in a critical condition right now. If he doesn’t make it through the night, you’ll be suspected of murder »
Faced with the woman's revelations, the room fell into silence, and while his first instinct might have been to seek comfort in Donna's eyes, at that moment, he didn't dare look at her. He took a deep breath before murmuring.
« I understand. Can I call my lawyer? »
« Of course »
He then entered the bathroom of the bedroom while Donna broke into sobs the moment the door closed, pressing her hands over her mouth to remain silent, fearing that Harvey would hear her. The police officer, unsure how to react, realized that, aside from the shock of everything that had happened, the boss and the employee were genuinely afraid for each other, being way closer than they pretended. Meanwhile, Harvey sighed upon hearing the woman's voice.
« Harvey? »
« I’m in deep shit, Jessica »
« What's going on? »
« Donna. A client tried to — I mean, I saw her with his hand around her throat, and I freaked out »
As he fell silent, unable to finish his sentence, the conversation remained silent for a few seconds before Jessica whispered.
« Is he dead? »
« I don't know. His prognosis is life-threatening »
« Where are you? »
« At the emergency room at Mount Sinai »
« How is she doing? »
« She's in shock »
« Fuck »
« Can you go to her place and get her some new clothes? He tore her dress. Her keys are on the set of keys I gave you once. Do you still have them? »
« Yes. I'll be there in twenty minutes »
« Thanks »
As soon as he hung up, he entered the room again, seeing Donna quickly wiping away her tears, his heart breaking into a thousand pieces as he addressed the policewoman.
« My lawyer is coming in twenty minutes »
« Harvey » whispered Donna.
As she looked at him with fear, realizing that she didn’t want to be victimized by one of their friends and that neither Louis nor Mike would have been a good idea — both men too attached to the redhead — he stepped closer and simply murmured.
« I called Jessica »
As she sighed in relief, reassured that it was the brunette, the lawyer being strong and able to separate things, and especially since she was a woman, she didn’t feel comfortable with a man seeing the marks on her body, except for Harvey, the only one she felt safe with. By the time Jessica arrived, the room remained silent until the lawyer entered, standing next to Donna, who was breaking into sobs as she placed the bag on the bed and turned to Harvey.
« Get out for a while »
« But — »
« Now, Harvey »
After making sure the redhead was okay, Harvey left the room with the cop while Jessica waited for the door to close and looked at Donna, who began to speak in a shaky voice, tears streaming down her face.
« He can't go to jail, Jessica »
« We're going to find a solution »
« He sent too many people there, he's going to get killed »
« I know »
« Fuck, it's all my fault »
« No it's not »
« I shouldn't have told him about it, we wouldn't have argued, and I might not have left. And if it had happened, he wouldn't have run after me so we could talk, he wouldn't have had to fight with him and end up in this situation. I should have never told him and walked out, at least he wouldn't have been there »
« But God knows what would have happened, Donna »
« Maybe, but at least he wouldn't be in the dock. It's my fault »
« Stop, I never want to hear you say that again. The only one at fault is that asshole who thinks he's untouchable because he's loaded with money, who thinks he can do whatever he wants to women because we live in a misogynistic society, you're not to blame »
« But I pushed him away »
« And you did the right thing »
« But Harvey — »
« Donna, stop. Do you think Harvey would have reacted any differently upon learning what he did to you? Probably worse than now, because that idiot would rather spend the rest of his life in prison than know he failed to protect you. Look, it’s not the time to talk about this, I get it, but you and Harvey share something that no one else will understand except for you two. You are the most important thing in his life, and the worst thing that could happen to him is losing you. So stop thinking it’s your fault, that you could’ve avoided the situation. You’re not to blame, Donna, and I can’t imagine how terrified you must have been, but don’t let guilt take you down, because if you do, he’ll fall with you. Do you understand? »
« Understood »
« Alright, change now, I think the three of us have things to discuss »
« Sure »
As she grabbed the bag, she went into the bathroom, changing out of her torn dress into a simple pair of black leggings, a white t-shirt, and a thick wool cardigan, the outfit covering every inch of her skin except for her neck, which she stared at in the mirror. While rummaging through the bag, she silently thanked Jessica for bringing makeup wipes before stepping out to face Harvey, who was talking quietly with the brunette. Both of them stopped when they noticed her.
« Donna, sit down, we need to talk about this »
As Donna sat cross-legged on the bed, Jessica leaning against it in front of her and Harvey on a chair next to it, the brunette started.
« What are you going to plead? »
« Guilty » whispered Harvey.
« No »
« Donna, look — »
« You can't plead guilty. Guilty to what? We don't even know what's going to happen to him, I mean, he's not dead yet, right? »
« The police say there's a chance he won't make it through the night, it won't be a case of assault and battery anymore but murder, Donna. I was the one who hit him, and even if it wasn't intentional, it's still done »
« Harvey is right, there's no way to deny that. The important thing is the defense that we will bring to reduce the sentence as much as possible »
« Charge me »
As Donna had just interrupted the conversation, she saw Jessica's sorry look and Harvey's shocked face, who whispered.
« What? »
« You can't go to prison, Harvey. It's too dangerous, and you've sent a lot of guys there, they're going to want to get revenge, and you're going to die if you go to prison. On top of that, you have a great career and influence, you're going to waste your life in prison. So, we can just say that it was me who hit him, that he had a bad fall, and that could have happened to me too. It was self-defense, my sentence would be lighter, and at least I know that — »
« Are you insane? Donna, in no world am I letting you take the blame for something I did »
« It's my fault, Harvey »
« No, it's my fault. I should have seen that you were uncomfortable around that asshole, I should have never left you alone with him, I should have never argued with you and let you leave angry. I hit that guy, and I have no regrets, and if I could have killed him, I would have done it with my hands around his throat »
« You can't go to jail, Harvey. This is not what I want you to — »
« Alright, stop, both of you » sighed Jessica.
For a few seconds, neither of them said anything, and as the brunette stood up, she sighed before whispering.
« Let's let the night pass to think about it, okay? »
« Alright »
Still in this silence, Jessica left your room, while the policewoman and a doctor entered the room reserved for Donna. Once alone, the woman in the white coat began to talk to Donna.
« Miss Paulsen. Your physicals are good, but we prefer to keep you here just tonight so that you can sleep, and tomorrow morning you can see the psychologist »
« I’m not going to be able to sleep. Every time I close my eyes, I see — » whispered Donna.
« We'll give you a sleeping pill to help you, okay? — I'll be right back »
« Thank you, doctor »
As the doctor smiled at the redhead before leaving the room, it was the policewoman who approached the two colleagues and spoke, an apologetic look on her face as she approached Harvey to address him.
« Look, you are not under arrest at the moment, but you must remain at the disposal of the police until we know what to do »
« Of course »
« I will leave you my contact information in case »
« Thank you, officer »
« Thank you »
Once alone, the room remained silent for a few seconds before Harvey settled down next to the redhead's bed before whispering.
« About tonight? Do you prefer to stay alone or — »
« Can you stay? »
« Sure. Here, or do you want me to stay in front of the door »
« Do you mind here? »
« Of course not »
« Should I put the television on for you? »
« I don't know, whatever you want »
« Do you want to talk? »
« No »
« Then we'll turn on the TV » smiled Harvey.
About ten minutes later, after the doctor had given the redhead a sleeping pill, they continued watching TV for a bit, Donna lying in the hospital bed, Harvey sitting next to her. Their hands had slowly moved toward each other, fingers interlaced until he heard her breathing deepen. After a while, she shifted to get more comfortable in bed, tugging on his hand as she did, until she was lying on her side, holding his forearm against her. Her two hands gripped it tightly while he couldn't bring himself to move. As he tried to find a somewhat comfortable position, he spent a few more hours just watching her sleep, absolutely beautiful with her mouth slightly open, before he fell asleep next to her, exhausted from reliving the images of Donna in that alley every time he closed his eyes. The next morning, when he heard the door open, Harvey woke up with a start, watching another doctor enter. He turned to look at Donna, still asleep, her cheek pressing against his hand as he murmured to the man.
« I asked for a female doctor »
« Sorry sir, they are all busy at the moment »
« We will wait then, besides, I prefer that she sleeps a little »
« I understand »
« Thank you »
Once the doctor was gone, he watched her for a few more seconds before realizing how much his shoulder hurt, his arm sore from the position he had fallen asleep in, allowing Donna to clutch his arm to fall asleep. A few minutes later, she finally woke up, and as she released his arm, turning onto her back, Harvey slid his hand along her arm, causing her to jump and sit up with wide eyes.
« Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you »
« No, it's fine, it's just for a moment, I forgot and — »
« It's alright, I'm here. You don't have to be scared, I would never hurt you »
« I know »
For a few seconds, the room was silent before she whispered.
« Any news? »
« No. Well, no one came to tell me anything, and I didn't see any cops, so I really have no idea »
« Alright »
« The doctor came by this morning, but you were asleep, I asked for them to come back later, and also for it to be a woman »
« Thanks, Harvey »
« Anything for you, Donna »
For a few more minutes, they whispered softly about everything and nothing until a doctor — a woman this time — arrived and allowed Donna to leave the hospital on the condition that she see a psychologist at least twice a week. The two of them then left Mount Sinai and headed toward the Uber that Harvey had ordered. As they got into the back of the car, Harvey couldn’t help but sneak glances at Donna, who was watching the landscape pass by as they made their way to her place. About twenty minutes later, as Harvey placed Donna’s bag on the table, he turned around, and neither of them really knew what to say until he was the first to break the silence.
« I'll go. Are you okay here alone? »
« Yeah, don't worry »
« Alright. Um, call me if you need anything? »
« I promise »
« Okay. See you, Donna »
« See you, Harvey »
Barely had the door slammed as Harvey left, Donna looked around her apartment for a few seconds before rushing to close all the windows and the front door, turning the TV up loud, each small noise making her panic. But as the evening grew darker and the door from her neighbors slammed shut, Donna was struck with panic and quickly grabbed her phone to dial the number she had memorized over the years, hearing his voice echo after a few seconds.
« Donna? Are you okay? »
« Can you come over? »
« I’ll be there in ten minutes »
As expected, he sent her a message to let her know he was there so as not to scare her by knocking on her door to see her opening it with wet eyes and pale complexion.
« Hey »
« I’m sorry »
« Don't, Donna. I was waiting for you to call me, I wasn't reassured not to be with you, it's fine »
For the rest of the evening, they sat on the couch, each on their side, watching a rerun of a movie without really paying attention. Donna, already showered and in her pajamas, was lost in thought about the fact that they had to wait for a verdict for the lawyer, while Harvey couldn't help but be consumed by the guilt of not being able to protect her. But as the movie was nearing its end and Harvey was yawning discreetly, the redhead got up before murmuring.
« We should sleep »
« Yeah, sure »
As she watched him grab a pillow and the blanket neatly folded on the edge of the couch, Donna whispered again.
« No, you're not going to sleep on the couch, I'll take it »
« Donna, there's no arguing »
« Harvey »
« Seriously »
« Let's share the bed, then »
« I don't think that's a good idea »
« Harv, you spent your last night asleep in a chair, you're not going to spend this one on a couch. Please, you'll be better off on a bed. Come on »
Without much of a choice, he followed Donna to her bedroom. But even though the situation was dramatic and the reason for his presence was sad, the moment he stepped through the door, he was flooded with warmth. The king-sized bed with its headboard that Donna had clung to with all her strength to avoid hitting her head every time Harvey would push into her, the bedside lamps where his boxer had ended up or the floor where their clothes were after they had tossed them carelessly, the large bay window where she had shivered when he had pushed her against it, devouring her neck without stopping, or the incredibly comfortable mattress that had supported his body when Donna was straddling him, with little high-pitched sounds escaping from her mouth. Everything reminded him of the other time. But as she approached the left side of the bed — the same side she used like the night they had shared — he quickly spoke.
« Do you mind if I take a shower? »
« No, of course. Clean towels are in the cabinet under the sink »
« Thanks »
Barely in the bathroom, he took a deep breath. Sure, it was in this room that he realized she had ruined him for life, that he had had the best night of his life but also made the worst decision the next morning. It was here that his life had taken a new direction, but it was also in this room that Donna needed him to comfort her. So, he took a cold shower, grabbed Donna's soap, which made him pause for a second before stepping out, drying himself off, and contemplating the room for a few seconds. It was the first time he had spent the night at a woman's place. Usually, they would come to his place and leave the next morning, or he would go to theirs, do what he had to do, and then go home in the middle of the night.
But now, surrounded by makeup, body products, beauty accessories, and even a box of tampons, he felt a sense of calm, as if this new closeness was doing him good. He put on new boxer shorts and a t-shirt before stepping out to join her. He saw her already lying in bed, the only light coming from her bedside lamp as she scrolled on her phone. Barely under the covers, he took advantage of the large size of the bed to avoid touching her before she turned off the light and wished him goodnight. But as he tried to find a comfortable position, turning over and over again, he heard Donna whisper.
« Everything okay? »
« Yeah, sorry, I'm just trying to find a comfortable position, and my shirt is bothering me, but it's alright »
« You can take it off, you know »
« What? »
« Your shirt, it's fine. I've seen your chest anyway »
I even got to lick whipped cream off it and dig my nails into it when I was riding you, thought Donna.
« Donna, I can't have you feeling uncomfortable, especially after.. you know »
« I promise you it's okay »
« Sure? »
« Yeah »
« Alright »
After a few seconds of movement and noise, Harvey threw his t-shirt onto the floor before getting back under the covers and hearing Donna's breathing slowing down, signaling that she had fallen asleep. The lawyer followed a few minutes later. After that, hours passed, and while both of them were deeply asleep, having never slept so well in nearly ten years, they were suddenly woken up by Harvey’s phone ringing. While Donna slept on her side, Harvey had moved during the night to find himself pressed against her, his chest against her back, their legs intertwined. He had slipped one arm around her neck to keep the upper part of her body close to him, while his other arm wrapped around her waist, his hand wedged between the mattress and her hip, holding the redhead firmly against him.
But as the phone kept ringing, he freed his arm from around her waist and reached blindly behind him to grab the phone from the nightstand, his other arm still around Donna's neck. She groaned as she was moved, until he finally settled back into his position, his head once again resting in the crook of her neck, his warm breath brushing against her shoulder as he whispered into the phone.
« Hello? »
« Harvey? »
« Yeah? »
« I got your subpoena »
« And? »
« Tomorrow, two o'clock »
« Alright »
« Where are you now? »
« At Donna’s »
« Can you come to the firm? »
« Can you come here? »
« I’ll be there in an hour »
« See you, Jessica »
« Bye Harvey »
As soon as he hung up, he dropped his phone on the mattress in front of Donna before tightening his grip on her and inhaling her scent, hearing her whisper still half asleep.
« Tomorrow? »
« Yeah »
« Harvey, I — »
« Hey, stop. We still have an hour, take advantage of it to sleep a little more, I'm here »
A few minutes later, he felt her body relax in his arms, and her breathing slow down, signaling that she had fallen asleep again. He took the opportunity to take a quick shower, change, make sure the room was completely dark, and that she was covered before closing the door behind him and letting Donna sleep a little longer. He then waited for Jessica in the living room. For almost half an hour, the two lawyers discussed what they were going to do until Jessica looked at Harvey with a serious expression while the man sighed before murmuring.
« This is serious, Harvey. I don't know how we're going to get you out of this shit »
« You're not going to get me out of this, the guy's pretty dead, right? I killed a man. That's all there is to know »
« And you don't care? »
« That I killed him? Yeah. That son of a bitch almost — »
As Harvey closes his mouth, unable to finish his sentence, his jaw clenched as he was overcome with hatred as he replayed the scene in his head. Seeing Harvey's face, Jessica sighed before whispering.
« Prison, Harvey »
« At least I know she's saved from that psycho, I was able to protect her »
« And how are you going to protect her from there? »
Again, the room fell silent, Jessica felt her heart clench for her protégé as she saw him rubbing his face, the despair visible in his eyes.
« What's done is done, there's little chance I'll get out of this unscathed »
« We can always try »
« How? »
« You know how »
« Jessica, no »
« There's more in four heads than in one »
« I don't think Donna wants the whole firm involved »
« We're talking about Louis and Mike »
« It could be anyone, I don't want it. It's already traumatic enough, I don't want her to feel like a victim by bringing everyone in »
« It's not everyone. Come on, there's a chance you'll get out of this with the bare minimum, but we need them »
« I wouldn't do it against Donna's wishes »
« I’m in »
As both heads turned, they saw Donna standing in the middle of the hallway, still in her pajamas but with a thick cardigan over it, her eyes heavy with sleep, and her hair pulled into a ponytail. Immediately, Harvey got up while Jessica could see how unsure he was about what to do to show her that he was there for her.
« Hey »
« Hey »
« Come on, settle in, I'll make you a coffee »
Without a word, he headed to the kitchen while Jessica looked at Donna to speak to her in a soft voice.
« Were you able to sleep? »
« Yeah, mmh, I'm exhausted, but I think it's more psychological than physical. Luckily, Harvey is here »
« Yeah »
« About Louis and Mike — »
« Harvey said it was only if you were comfortable with the idea. If you don't want to, we won't say anything, understand? »
« Will it help Harvey? »
« I’m sure of it »
« Then I’m okay »
« Donna » whispered Harvey.
« It's okay, Harv. I promise »
While the room stayed silent for a few seconds, Jessica watched as the redhead and her protégé exchanged looks, a multitude of words being shared without a single sound. It was something that had always fascinated the brunette — how connected they were. Immediately, Harvey called Mike, and Jessica contacted Louis, while Donna finished her breakfast and isolated herself in the bathroom. She washed, put on makeup, covered her bruises with concealer, then let her hair down and took a deep breath before stepping out of the bathroom to face the four lawyers who were watching her.
« Don't look at me like that »
« Are you okay? » whispered Mike.
« Are you gonna get Harvey out of this shit? »
« I’ll do everything I can to »
« Then I'll be okay »
When the room fell silent again for a few seconds, Jessica clapped her hands to grab everyone's attention before the four lawyers sat down at the table to begin preparing the defense, while Donna was already organizing Harvey’s agenda, rescheduling his appointments, and creating a provisional client dispatch list in case he ended up spending his days in prison, praying it won’t be the case. In the evening, when no one had eaten yet, Donna ordered some shitty Thai from down the street before they all had dinner, with Mike acting like an idiot to try to lighten the mood. When they all decided it was time to leave, Harvey felt Donna’s gaze on him. He nodded quickly, silently signaling that he would stay with her that night too if she wished. Once again, they took turns using the bathroom before sharing the bed, unconsciously migrating during the night until they ended up in each other's arms.
They were woken the next morning by Mike, who knocked on the redhead's door and was smart enough not to comment on the fact that he had noticed they had just woken up together and that the couch hadn’t been used. By twelve-thirty, both of them headed to the lawyer's office so he could change, meeting up again half an hour later at the courthouse. As Harvey sat next to Jessica, with Donna behind him, accompanied by Mike and Louis by her side, the judge entered the courtroom, signaling the start of the hearing.
« The hearing is now open. Please rise. The case of the defendant, Harvey Specter, is now being heard. You may be seated »
As everyone sat back down, the judge resumed speaking.
« We are here for a preliminary hearing to clarify certain aspects of the case before proceeding to trial. I will now ask the plaintiff to provide an overview of the case »
« Your Honor, in this matter, the defendant, Mr. Specter, is accused of delivering a violent blow to the victim, Elijah Anderson, on Thursday the 12th, resulting in the man being in critical condition at the hospital with a serious prognosis. The evidence we have includes testimonies from the police officers and paramedics at the scene, as well as the state in which both men were found at the time of the arrest. We request that this case be heard as soon as possible »
« Mr. Pearson, do you have any objections to the procedure or any specific requests regarding this case before the trial? »
« Yes, Your Honor. We request that our client be granted release under judicial supervision. We believe there is no risk of flight from our client »
« And will you be calling witnesses for the defense during the trial? »
As both of them turned towards the redhead to see if she was sure about wanting to testify, Donna nodded, looking at Harvey anxiously as he nodded in return, with Jessica taking the floor again.
« Yes, Your Honor. We already have the real victim in this story who will testify, and likely a series of other witnesses as well »
« Alright, I take note of that. Well, I grant the release under judicial supervision for your client, I don't believe Mr. Specter would take the risk of fleeing. The case is adjourned to the 20th for trial. The parties must submit all their arguments and evidence before that date. The hearing is adjourned »
As everyone left the courtroom, seeing the tears in Donna's eyes, Harvey apologized to his colleagues before taking her hand and pulling her into a hallway to talk, unaware that the judge handling the case was observing and listening from a distance.
« Hey »
« I’m so sorry, Harvey »
« What are you talking about? »
« You're gonna ruin your life because of me »
« That's not true, it's not your fault »
« Of course it is, it's all my fault. I should have never rejected his advances, he wouldn't have taken it the wrong way »
« You know very well that he would have done it anyway »
« So I should have let him do it and — »
« Stop. I never want to hear you say that again, do you understand? You're not responsible for anything, and no matter what you would have said or done, it would have changed nothing. That guy was a scumbag, and he should never have put his hands on you, he had no right, and he did it. I punched him in the face, and he fell, I didn't foresee what was going to happen, I didn't think. But trust me, I would have killed him with my own hands if I could have »
« You don't mean that »
« I do. Remember when you started working for me and you told me you'd take a bullet for me? Well, this is my bullet for you. I always told you I'd be there for you and protect you, and that's exactly what I'm doing »
« This is not fair »
« I know, but that's just the way it is »
« I’m sorry »
As she began crying again, Harvey quickly slid his hands under the redhead’s arms to pull her against him. Donna wrapped her arms around his shoulders, hiding her face in the crook of his neck, while he tightened his hold on her, pushing her body with his until she was trapped between him and the wall. As he barely pulled away to take her face in his hands, he quickly wiped away her tears before placing a tender kiss on her forehead, then on her cheek, again and again, speaking in a soft voice.
« Everything will be okay, alright? Have faith in me »
For a few more seconds, they stayed like that until Harvey finally pulled away from Donna and intertwined their fingers again, leading her out of the courthouse and back to her place. Days passed, and while Jessica, Mike, Louis, and Harvey dedicated all their time to building Harvey’s defense, he alternated between helping them and accompanying Donna to her psychiatric sessions, waiting for her to finish before returning home with her. Soon, the day of the trial arrived, and as they had requested privacy, only the four lawyers, Donna, the opposing party, the judge, and the jury were present.
The three bangs of the gavel startled Donna, who quickly tried to swallow as she heard the prosecutor begin speaking. After announcing the charges, the trial started, and the redhead wasn’t sure she understood everything that was happening, too busy watching Harvey’s bouncing leg, a sign that he was stressed. For nearly an hour, Jessica explained how her client was a good and serious man and how the situation he found himself in had forced him to act the way he did without expecting what happened. As the proceedings went on and each side presented their case, the judge raised her hand to interrupt before a woman whispered something in her ear, and Donna and Harvey’s world came crashing down.
« We're going to have to reschedule this trial for a later date. Elijah Anderson died »
Before he could even answer, look at Jessica, discuss it, or anything, he turned to Donna, who now had her elbows on her knees, her face in her hands, and was crying. He got out of his chair, jumped over the barrier that separated him from the audience, before removing her hands from Donna's face and holding her against him, the redhead crying into his neck.
« Hey, it's okay, I promised you, right? And I never break my promises, especially not the one I made to you. Stop crying, it breaks my heart, please »
« I’m so sorry, Harvey »
« It's alright »
As he continued to hug her, Jessica hurried to negotiate with the judge to avoid Harvey spending his nights in jail until the next trial, and even if she felt like it was mission impossible, the brunette had to try.
« Mr. Pearson, he is suspected of murder »
« You consider him a dangerous man who cannot be free? He punched a man who was about to rape a woman and who unfortunately fell badly. He is a respectable lawyer with a clean criminal record and no priors. What do you think he will do? Kill again? Run away? None of that. Now, they will just go home together, where he will do everything to comfort her while she continues to feel guilty about what this asshole did to her »
For a few seconds, the judge said nothing until she whispered.
« Alright, I'm authorizing release under judicial supervision until next week, but as honorable as his gesture was, Mr. Specter killed a man. Your defense will have to be solid, because if it's not, I have a feeling the sentence will be as tragic for him as it is for her »
As the two women watched Harvey, still holding Donna against him, Jessica realized that this had to be a masterstroke if she didn’t just want to save one, but two lives. Quickly, they all left the courthouse in silence, and while the redhead's apartment had become the HQ for the four lawyers, this time Harvey asked to be left alone with her, letting her cry in his arms until she fell asleep, exhausted from everything that had been happening. That night, as he lay next to her, he didn’t sleep a wink, realizing that what scared him the most wasn’t prison, but the thought of being without her.
Days passed, and the lawyers continued working day and night until the day of the trial, when Donna sat on the edge of Harvey’s bed, watching him put on a navy-blue tie, dressed in a magnificent Tom Ford suit. Normally, this scene would have given her butterflies in her stomach, but this time, it made her want to throw up. As he looked at her in the mirror, her eyes filled with tears, and he quickly sat next to her and murmured.
« Hey, I wanted you to know that no matter what the verdict is, I have no regrets, okay? You're the best reason I could have ended up in jail »
« Harvey » moaned Donna.
« Seriously. Look, we're going to go to that trial, I'm sure Jessica, Mike, and Louis are going to do everything they can to get me through this, and I swear to you that when I get out of this trial, we're going to have a real talk, you and I »
« About what? »
« You know what. Come on, we're not going to end up being late »
As he intertwined his fingers with Donna's, Harvey pulled on her arm before leaving his condo and heading toward the courthouse, their hearts racing. Barely settled, now alone with the relevant parties, not wanting this to be a public trial, the hearing began, and Donna jumped again at the sound of the gavel striking the table. At first, Jessica outlined how Elijah was a pig, detailing the various complaints of sexual assault, psychological harassment, blackmail, and extortion, while also reminding the court that he had already been convicted of tax fraud and assault. The brunette then continued to describe Harvey, his clean record, his influence, his near-perfect behavior, and his importance, comparing the two men to demonstrate who the real villain was in the story. Then came the moment everyone dreaded: Donna’s testimony.
« Thank you, Your Honor. The State calls Donna Paulsen to the stand »
As soon as she stood up and approached the witness stand to take the oath, Harvey started to panic. While he didn’t care about talking about himself or exposing himself, he refused to let the redhead feel even a second of insecurity.
« Miss Paulsen. Can you tell us where you were just before the incident? »
« I was leaving the firm where I work as a legal secretary, at Pearson »
« Can you describe what happened after you left the building? »
Seeing Donna swallow nervously, Harvey tensed up before speaking in a loud and authoritative voice, feeling Jessica's hand on his forearm to keep him from losing his temper. But he didn't care about that. Seeing Donna so uncomfortable, he was ready to end the trial, accept his fate, just to prevent her from reliving that moment.
« Does it have to be like this? »
« Mr. Specter, please, respect the opposing counsel »
A fraction of a second later, Donna began to speak in a trembling voice, tears threatening to escape from the corners of her eyes. Harvey was losing his mind, getting more and more frustrated as Jessica kept her hand on his arm to keep him from exploding and ruining everything. As the man continued to ask more personal and increasingly misogynistic questions, Harvey was torn between fighting back in front of everyone and listening to Jessica, who kept whispering « patience » as he didn’t move, but he could feel his breath quicken and his heart race. After a few minutes, when the man finally finished his questions, Jessica stood up to speak, her voice firm.
« Your Honor, we request the admission of this video as evidence, which shows the various behaviors of Elijah Anderson toward Miss Paulsen throughout the day, and is accompanied by a certificate of authenticity »
A few seconds later, the video was projected in the courtroom while Harvey swallowed hard, seeing these images for the first time. In the first shot, he saw the redhead tense up the moment he appeared in front of her desk, and even though there was no audio, her body language spoke volumes. After a few seconds, when he saw the moment the man forced his thumb into Donna's mouth, causing her to pull back quickly, Harvey murmured unconsciously. The entire room turned to look at him.
« I’m going to be sick »
Then, the second video showed the scene in the elevator where he felt anger rising as he saw the man tighten his grip on her wrist while the redhead tried to free herself. And if Harvey thought it couldn't get any worse, seeing one of the surveillance cameras film the secretary leaving the building, taking a determined step forward into the street, passing through the alley where he had found her suffocating, Harvey felt bile rise in his esophagus as he saw the man emerge from the shadows, placing one hand around her mouth, the other on her stomach before she disappeared from the video, Harvey murmuring.
« Alright, stop. I need a minute »
As the judge called a quick break, Harvey walked out of the room, followed by a guard, to the restroom to throw cold water on his face and try to regain his senses. As he took a deep breath to try to calm his racing heart, he heard two knocks at the door and was surprised to see Donna enter.
« Hey »
« Hey »
« You’re alright? »
« I should be asking you that »
« It’s fine, Harvey »
« How can you stand all this? I can’t even watch those videos without wanting to throw up. Donna, I’m sorry, I should have forbidden you from testifying — »
« Harv »
« — I should have never made you relive that, you shouldn’t have come here, we should have accepted no matter what sentence we gave me without you having to go in front of everyone, but never — »
« Harv, stop »
As Donna now had both her hands on Harvey's cheeks, forcing him to look her in the eyes, both of them were breathing deeply, their hearts pounding as the world seemed to have stopped spinning for a few seconds. Without expecting it, Donna approached, pressed her body to the lawyer's before capturing his lips between hers. At that moment, it was as if everything was settled, that everything was over, while Harvey rushed to respond with hunger and passion, trying to make her understand everything he felt in this kiss. In a split second, he lifted her up with his large hands under her thighs to drop her on the countertop of the restroom, between two sinks, placing his two hands now on the redhead's cheeks to devour her lips again and again, both of them moaning into each other's mouths, catching up on almost eight years of frustration and repressed feelings after the other time.
They needed each other, and for a few seconds, they didn't think about the consequences anymore, they didn't care that Harvey might die in prison, that Donna would be alone without him in New York, that he would ruin her career, that she would never be able to rebuild herself without him, all they needed was each other. The kiss was both tender and full of feelings but also urgent and hurried as if everything could stop in a split second, which it did. In addition to their lips and tongues sliding against each other, Harvey slid his hands down her neck, on her cheeks, in her hair — god, he loved her hair — while Donna imitated him, sliding the tip of her finger in his hair, his neck, and his back, pushing with her heels on his ass to bring him as close to her as possible, both of them lacking air until they were forced to separate when the guard knocked on the door.
« Coming » yelled Harvey.
Immediately, he focused again on Donna, stroking her cheek with his thumb, his hand resting on her jaw, as Harvey sighed before whispering.
« Everything is going to be okay. I don’t care about me, I just don't want you to feel uncomfortable during this trial, alright? »
« Harvey »
« I’m dead serious »
« I know. But as uncomfortable as it is, there's no way we're not going to give it our all so you don't end up in jail »
« I killed a guy, Donna »
« Harv »
« But I have no regrets. I would do it a thousand times over if I knew you were safe. So please, stop crying, I have enough confidence in Jessica, Louis, and Mike to do a good job, and even if the verdict is not what we expect, at least I know you are safe from this asshole, and for me, that is enough. Come on, now, we have to go back »
After one last kiss, they left the restroom, and less than five minutes later, everyone had found their places in the courtroom while the trial resumed. If both parties continued to defend their clients, Jessica hurried him to parade a series of women who testified against him, explaining the monstrosities he had been able to do while no one showed up to defend the honor of this man hated by all. After nearly an hour, the opposing lawyer called Harvey to the stand, and the lawyer stood up to settle down and press the oath, ready to testify.
« Mr. Specter, can you explain to us what happened the night of the accident? »
« I had finished my appointment with Mr. Anderson and when he left, I had a phone conversation with my brother that made me a little angry. So when Donna arrived to talk to me, I was still a little on edge, so I pushed her away. She left, and I realized that I had gone too far, so I left the firm in turn to go after her and apologize, but once in the street, she was no longer there, I thought she had already caught a taxi. I tried to call her, and I heard her phone ringing not far from me, so I followed the sound. But in the distance, I saw something sparkly on the ground on the sidewalk, I came closer, and I recognized the lipstick she was wearing. I found it strange that it was there, so I approached again until I heard muffled voices, and then I saw her bag on the ground, all the contents outside and her jacket thrown on the ground. And when I looked up — »
Recalling the moment, Harvey wanted to vomit and interrupted himself hastily while the opposing counsel continued to ask questions, seeing that he would not get more from the defendant.
« You said he pulled out a knife. Can you describe it and how you saw Mr. Anderson brandish it? »
« I didn't see it at first, but after a while, I saw that he was holding something in his left hand, but everything happened quickly, I just saw that he was holding it and that the blade was close to Donna’s thigh »
« Did you try to take it away from him or avoid the confrontation before acting? »
« Is that a real question? »
As he watched Donna swallow and Jessica sigh, knowing that was the question not to ask Harvey, the young lawyer straightened up in his chair before leaning towards the man who had just asked him the question and whispering in a deep, low voice, loud enough for everyone in the room to hear while his eyes were filled with anger.
« I didn’t try to take it away from him or avoid the confrontation. Do you know what it’s like to see the person you love most in the world, in a dark alley, choking because a man pressed his hand so hard around her throat that she couldn’t get any air? Do you know what it’s like to see the most important person to you with a blade pressed against her thigh, the bottom of her dress shredded, her feet barely touching the ground as she couldn’t do anything because she’s slowly losing every ability in her body? To see in the eyes of the only person who keeps me sane for years that she knows she can’t do anything to fight it anymore, that unfortunately, she’s about to experience the most traumatic thing a human being can experience and that she’s helpless in the face of it. Do you believe I thought to take it away from him or avoid the confrontation? No, I didn’t. I just freaked out about losing the woman I've been in love with for almost ten years to some asshole that society protects because he's a rich man. So yeah, I killed him, and there's not a day that’ll go by that I won't regret taking someone's life, but in the situation I was in, and especially the situation she was in, I didn't think. I walked over, I punched him away, and he fell. After that, I didn't care about him anymore, I just wanted to make sure Donna was okay, that was all. The most important thing to me was to know that she was safe and alright, and I did what seemed most obvious to me at that moment: protecting her »
After Harvey's testimony, the room fell into silence as Donna quickly wiped her cheeks and the tears that had not stopped flowing for a minute now. Seeing that he was done, Harvey was invited to return to his seat, and barely behind the desk again, while Donna was right behind him, she discreetly leaned over, slipped her arms around his shoulders to place a tender kiss on his neck to whisper a simple thank you, Harvey turning his head as much as possible to place a small kiss on her arm and slide his cheek and nose over her smooth skin, before both sitting back down in their place, Jessica, Louis, and Mike looking at them a little shocked, not expecting it, but at the same time, not being so surprised by it either. For another twenty minutes, Jessica demonstrated that the man was indeed well armed and that in addition, he was probably heavily intoxicated since he could be seen leaving a deli with several bottles of alcohol half an hour before assaulting Donna.
After both parties had presented their arguments, the judge and the jury withdrew to deliberate while everyone patiently waited for an answer. Harvey quickly turned to Donna and smiled at her, the five of them talking together. A few minutes later, as everyone returned to the room to take their seats, Harvey sat down again, facing the judge, moving his arm to rest on the back of his chair, reaching toward Donna behind him, while the redhead eagerly intertwined her fingers with his, both of them squeezing tightly to show their support as they waited for the verdict with a knot in their stomachs.
« After reviewing the evidence and hearing the testimonies of the witnesses, the court has acknowledged the verdict rendered by the jury in this case. The jury found the defendant guilty of second-degree murder but also recognized the defense of self-defense without premeditation. Under the laws of the state government, the court considers that the defendant acted under mitigating circumstances, which impacts the sentence. However, given the severity of the offense, the court pronounces the following sentence: six months of imprisonment, accompanied by a fine of 200,000 dollars. Additionally, a two-year probationary period is granted, provided you comply with the following conditions, such as no further offenses and adherence to probation rules. The court further informs you that, should you violate the conditions of your probation during the two-year period, you may be required to serve the full prison sentence. The date of your entry into prison will be set at a later time by the correctional authorities. This decision is made in accordance with the principles of justice and the specific circumstances of your case. The court strongly advises you to comply with the terms of this sentence, Mister Specter »
The sentence could have been worse, that was for sure, and while the fine meant nothing to Harvey — he charged his clients a thousand dollars per hour, after all — what was hardest to accept was the six months of incarceration, where he would have to put his life on hold, but most of all, be without her. As soon as the verdict was rendered, the judge slammed her gavel, and everyone stood up. Harvey quickly turned to look at Donna, who was wiping away her tears despite herself.
« Hey, stop crying. It’s not that bad, right? »
« Harv »
« I get it, 200,000 is like a few hundred Gucci and Hermes bags — sorry about that — but I promise I’ll work a little harder to get you something nicer as soon as I’ve paid off my debt. And as for the probation, I promise I’ll never kill a man again. Well, I’ll probably fight off a few assholes who hit on you a little too much, you know, just to mark my territory, but I’ll try not to kill them this time »
« Hey, this is not funny »
« Yeah, sorry. My bad »
« You’re an idiot » snorted Donna with wet eyes.
« I know. Sorry about that »
« Jail, Harvey » whispered the redhead.
« Only for six months, and I’m pretty sure they’ll do anything for me to be out sooner, right? »
« Of course » smiled Jessica.
« You can count on us » added Louis.
« We’ll not let you down » whispered Mike, giving him a friendly slap on his shoulder.
« See? I’m not alone »
For a few seconds, no one said anything, and as the other three lawyers could see that something had shifted between Harvey and Donna, by mutual agreement, they left them alone. With the jury and the judge having also left, there were only the two lovers and a guard, who pulled out his phone to give them some privacy. Immediately, they found themselves face to face. Harvey, having crossed the barrier separating him from the audience, leaned against it, while Donna positioned herself between his open legs, sighing as the lawyer wiped away her tears.
« Promise me you’ll stop crying now? »
« Promise me you’ll take care of yourself? »
« I promise »
« So do I »
« Good »
« Six months, Harv »
« It'll go by so fast, you'll see. Plus, it'll give me time to take a break, you know, focus on something else like working out and sculpting that Apollo-like body »
« I’m serious » sighed Donna with a small smile.
« Me too. I'd be the sexiest detainee you'd ever seen »
« Seriously, I can't help but feel guilty. It's because of me that you're going to be in jail, Harvey »
« Hey, it’s not your fault, a bit of mine, maybe, but mostly, it’s his. And let me tell you, I prefer to spend the rest of my life in jail than knowing that you’re not safe »
« What do you always have to be the hero? »
« Not for anyone. Just for you »
« I’m gonna miss you »
« I’m gonna miss you too, but you’ll come to see me, right? »
« Of course » smiled Donna as she slid her fingers in his hair.
« And I promised you that, as soon as I’m out, I stop hiding and being afraid. I’m pretty sure that six months without you will finally open my eyes and make me realize how much I need you to be truly happy »
« So we could finally be together? »
« Obviously » chuckled Harvey.
For a few seconds, they simply looked at each other as Harvey placed his hands on her hips, pulling her toward him. Donna slightly lost her balance and fell against him, using their new position to slide her hands onto his cheeks, then to the back of his head, their faces only a few inches apart. As they could see all the love they had for each other, they both moved closer until their lips touched first in a timid kiss, then in something more intense, until the guard cleared his throat, forcing them to pull apart. A few seconds later, they left the courtroom hand in hand, while Louis, Jessica, and Mike were smart enough to say nothing until the brunette informed Harvey that he had two days to prepare for his six-month absence and that he would be transferred to Montgomery County Jail near Fultonville, far enough from Manhattan to avoid running into anyone but close enough for Donna to visit him without much difficulty.
For nearly two days, Donna and Harvey prepared for the lawyer's absence, citing a personal emergency to their clients, while spending their days in the redhead's apartment on their laptops and their nights in each other's arms, never crossing the second line, afraid of regretting it once they were separated. On the morning of his incarceration, he watched Donna sleeping in his arms before placing a kiss on her forehead, inhaling her scent one last time before quietly leaving the bedroom, then the redhead's apartment half an hour later and without a final glance, knowing it would be too difficult to say goodbye to her. Barely downstairs, he chuckled softly as he saw Jessica, Mike, and Louis waiting in front of the brunette's big car, letting out a sigh with a smirk.
« You all came »
« What did you expected? » whispered Louis.
« The great Harvey Specter in jail, it's something to see at least once in a lifetime » snorted Mike.
« You’re an idiot. Come on, we should go, I don’t want the police to come and get me because I didn’t respect the deal »
« What about Donna? » asked
« She’s still sleeping »
In the face of Harvey's words, none of them said anything, as they all understood how difficult the separation must be for both of them. While neither Harvey nor Donna had ever spoken about what they were to each other or even what they felt for one another, the three lawyers had spent enough time by their side to realize they were everything to each other. So once in the car, the journey was made in silence, and nearly three hours later, they stopped in front of the penitentiary. Side by side, leaning against the car, Jessica murmured next to him as Louis and Mike were listening.
« You’re gonna be alright? »
« I will — You’re gonna take care of her? Right? I don’t want her to be sad, know that she cries or anything »
« We will, don’t worry » said Louis.
After squeezing the bald man’s shoulder, Harvey turned his head to look at Jessica again, wondering without even asking as the brunette understood and smiled.
« You’re allowed six visits per month. I’ve already reserved them all for her. She’ll come every Saturday at ten, and I’ve already arranged with a guard so you can see her for two hours instead of one »
Without even responding, Harvey looked at Jessica with his trademark smirk before pulling her into a hug, doing the same with Louis and then Mike as he took a deep breath before heading toward the building where he would live for the next six months. Meanwhile, Donna slowly woke up, and as she slid her hand next to her, only to meet cold sheets, she sat up abruptly, got out of bed, and left her room to find that her apartment was strangely empty, no trace of Harvey anywhere in sight. Her first feeling was to be upset with him for leaving without saying goodbye, as tears began to rise, but she stopped dead in her tracks when she saw everything on the table.
Next to the enormous bouquet of red roses was a white box with the logo of her favorite bakery, along with a Cartier bag. Her heart raced as she thought about how he had probably gone to pick everything up and set it all up while she was still asleep, not wanting to leave without one last gesture. After discovering cinnamon rolls and lemon poppy seed muffins — her two favorites — she smiled at the huge bouquet of flowers and hurried to grab the bag. Pulling out the box with the store’s colors, she opened it to find a beautiful necklace typical of the brand. She then reached for the envelope inside with a trembling hand, eyes already wet after reading the first sentences.
You know how bad I am with words, but you deserve to know how hard this is for me.
These next six months are going to be tough, and to be honest, the thought of being away from you is already killing me, but know that even though I’ll be far from you, I’ll never stop thinking about you, and the distance won’t change what I feel for you. These last few days by your side, as short as they were, have been the best of my life. You’ve taught me how to love in a way I never imagined, and your smile, your beautiful eyes, the way you look at me and put me in my place every time I mess up, is going to be the hardest thing to live without. I know it’s not going to be easy, but I believe in us and in the fact that we love each other enough to get through this. I mean, what’s six months compared to the last decade? I don’t know when we’ll see each other again, but I’ll be waiting for you with impatience.
Until the day I can see you again, take care of yourself, know that I’m thinking about you constantly, and there’s nothing I want more than to be with you again. I probably won’t have the courage to say it to your face, but I love you deeply, I’ve always loved you, and I always will.
Love, Harvey
As she wiped away the few tears that had fallen, smiling sadly at Harvey’s words, her heart raced at the thought that he had expressed his love in that letter, especially since the lawyer had always struggled to express his feelings. She quickly put on the necklace he had given her, the two intertwined circles — one set with diamonds, the other with Carter’s design — cold against the skin of her neckline, as she jumped when her phone rang, the name of the brunette appearing on the screen.
« Jessica? »
« Hey »
« You dropped him? »
« We did, yeah »
« Alright »
« You can already go see him on Saturday »
« Really? » smiled the redhead.
« Yeah, and let me tell you, he can’t wait »
« I can’t wait either »
For a few seconds, the two women chatted a little longer before Donna hung up, the redhead's smile growing at the thought that in just a few days, she would see the one who made her heart race wildly. The necklace, heavy with meaning, rested against her skin, as if he were there with her, waiting for the day they would be reunited in six months and finally be together like they always dreamed of.
Six months later
Since his departure, she had seen him thirty-six times in total, and every time he walked into the visitation room and she saw him unharmed, his typical smirk on his face, she couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief. Every time, for nearly two hours, they talked about everything and nothing. The lawyer couldn’t resist caressing her hands, placing tender little kisses on her knuckles and fingers, leaning in to kiss her whenever the guards had their backs turned. Harvey did everything he could to show her that he was fine —joking around, making her laugh to the point where he would flex his biceps for her to touch, or lift up his t-shirt to show her his abs from daily workout sessions, even if it meant doing it in front of everyone. Even though the separation was tough, these weekly visits made things easier. And while they hadn’t exactly named their relationship yet, they were definitely together, and God, Harvey made sure everyone who would listen knew it.
« That's quite the smile, Specter »
« No kidding »
« Happy to be out, I see »
« Especially happy to see my girl »
« Not surprised »
As the correctional officer laughed, she handed Harvey his belongings, then gave him a mirror, allowing him a few seconds to check himself out. The woman snorted while murmuring.
« Alright, Specter. You’re all set for her, still a pretty boy »
« That’s all that matters »
« You’re gonna be missed around here. You’ve done a lot of good »
During his time in prison, the lawyer had taken it upon himself to help the other inmates build their defenses, especially those who couldn’t afford a good attorney, as he quickly became well-liked and respected among the other prisoners.
« Thank you, Denise »
After shaking the woman's hand, Harvey took a deep breath before grabbing his bag and heading out of the building. He stopped suddenly with a big smile as he saw what was in front of him. A little farther ahead, while Jessica and Mike were leaning against the car, it was especially the long red hair from behind that made the lawyer's heart race. As he quickly approached, barely had she turned around than she jumped into Harvey's arms, and he pulled her close. Without thinking, she wrapped her legs around his waist and her arms around his neck before they kissed again and again, laughing against each other’s mouths, ignoring the other two adults next to them. As Harvey moved closer to the car's hood, he sat her on it, pressing his body against hers until they were both lying down, Harvey on top of Donna as they kept kissing while Mike and Jessica watched each other a bit uncomfortable, and the blonde murmured.
« Well, I'm a little embarrassed »
For a few seconds neither of them said anything, watching Donna and Harvey french kissing intensely until Jessica chuckled as she spoke.
« Alright, that’s it, stop behaving like horny teens, I’m ashamed of you two right now »
As Donna removed her hands from Harvey's neck, she placed one on the lawyer's chest to push him away and the other on the hood of the car to lift herself up as she was still sitting on the hood, the lawyer’s hands under her thighs. Harvey then placed one last kiss on her lips before both of them looked at Mike and Jessica, who were quietly laughing at the behavior of the two lovers.
« Oh, you’re done? I didn't get it »
« Don’t be jealous, Mike »
« Louis is sorry he couldn’t come »
« It’s fine — hey Jessica »
« Hey »
For a second, Harvey hugged Jessica quickly, then Mike, while Donna was still sitting on the hood, her legs around Harvey, gently caressing his back as he exchanged a few words with the other two lawyers. Once finished, Jessica and Mike climbed into the front of the car while Harvey continued to kiss the redhead, stopping only when the brunette honked and they were forced to separate, looking at each other lovingly.
« Hey you »
« Hey »
« You’re so beautiful »
« And you’re handsome. Buzzcut is hot »
« Glad you like it »
As the brunette honked once again, Harvey helped Donna get off the hood, and once in the car, the four of them began to chat, well, more like three since Harvey didn't seem interested, the former prisoner alternated between observing each feature of the redhead minutely, grabbing her jaw to kiss her languorously, or placing small kisses on her neck, making Mike grumble every time he saw in the rearview mirror his best friend, who was way too focused on his girlfriend. For the rest of the journey, they kept talking until they reached the bottom of the redhead's building, and Harvey quickly rushed out with her, their fingers still intertwined as they hurried to get into the apartment.
Barely inside, the redhead jumped into his arms, and he carried her toward Donna's bedroom, falling onto the mattress with her. For a few seconds, neither of them said anything, too busy looking at each other, Harvey analyzing every feature of her face, gliding his finger over each perfectly shaped part of her while occasionally placing light kisses on her lips until she murmured.
« I can’t believe you’re here »
« And I can’t believe you waited for me » snorted Harvey.
« I told you I will »
« Yeah, but still »
As she kissed him once again, he started to snort as she looked at him with a huge smile.
« What? »
« Do you realize your man is an ex-con? »
« Hot » giggled the redhead.
« If you say so »
« Harv? »
« Yeah? »
« You know I waited for almost nine years »
« For? »
As he looked at her with a smirk, clearly understanding where she was going with this, Harvey gently bit his lip while watching her. The other time was eight years ago, well, eight years and a little over six months if you really thought about it. And while they had each had relationships with other people in the meantime, they had never been able to forget the feeling of their bodies together. So, now, with both of them alone in the room where a passion like never before had been born, they both knew exactly what the other was thinking, and even though Harvey wanted to show just how sincere he was in his feelings and that he wasn’t just there for the physical side, he knew they definitely needed it.
Seeing her smile at him adorably, looking at him with her beautiful brown-green eyes as she slid her hand to the back of his head, he leaned in a little more, capturing her lips with his, sliding his hands under her t-shirt while rubbing against her, both of them moaning in the other’s mouth. They had made love for hours, and as they both lay breathless beside each other on their backs, they each took a few seconds to collect their thoughts before Harvey turned his head to look at her, hooking his finger under her chin to gaze into her eyes, completely mesmerized to see that he was finally by her side.
He would never forget when, more than eleven years ago, she had told him that she would take a bullet for him, expecting the same from him in return. And while at the time her words had seemed like empty promises, he never would have imagined feeling the weight of those words a decade later.
Because if she was ready to take a bullet for him, he didn't hesitate to kill for her.