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I looked upon the three beasts, all elegant, majestic, and very, very deadly. I felt the sweat collect at the back of my neck as I saw those intense eyes and sharp white teeth. I steeled myself for what I knew was coming.
“Attack!”
I threw my staff up to shield myself in vain. The white light consumed me, pinpricks of hot air burned against me skin, and in the next instant I found myself surrounded by various tombstones; the stench of death heavy in the air.
I kicked the ground in frustration. My first battle and I had lasted all of one turn, disgraceful. This was no way to begin to re-serve my master. I should not complain though as I was far from the only one here, but they had not made the promise I had so long ago and so, they did not have the same connection to him as I did. I had made a promise to myself to serve my master and I had every intention of keeping it. He was the only goal, the only focus, the only reason for my existence. It had been that way eons ago and would continue to be that way until the end of time. I thought nothing would ever get in the way of my duty to him. Foolish of me really, I would soon learn, to think things would never change.
***
Master won in the end. Masters I should say as there were two of them now. It was going to be very interesting like this I thought as I went into my quarters; removed my amour, and placed it on its stand. I moved into the next room; removed the last of my clothing, and I sank into the warm bath waters with a sigh. Even when the battles lasted only mere moments they still put a great strain on the body. As I let the warmth slowly fill my body I let my mind drift to the new master. A strange boy he was. Yugi I think was his name. A little bit unsure of himself to be sure, but still pure and strong. With a little more practice he would be more than capable of wielding the power of the deck.
When I felt I was fully recovered I got out of the water and pulled on a white robe. Slipping on a pair of soft white shoes I headed out into the courtyard. As I walked down the wide marble steps I heard the familiar clash of metal. I looked over the railing and spotted Neo and a young elf warrior practicing. I watched them in their graceful movements. I had never seen the warrior before, but he was not totally inexperienced. He was battling against Neo very well. I must say I was impressed. I made a note to introduce myself the next time I saw him. Little did I know that next time I saw him it would be under far less than ideal circumstances.
***
I could not believe it! I had attacked a fellow monster! I had to apologize to him immediately. I found him perched on top of a rock outcrop looking out at the sunset. I cleared my throat and he looked over at me.
“Why are you up here?”
“I came to ask you if you are all right from the duel, are you?”
“Yes, I am perfectly fine.”
“I am so sorry for attacking you like that.”
“Do not apologize. You were not in your right mind at the time.”
“That does excuse my behaviour please accept my apology.”
“Of course you are forgiven.”
“Thank you.”
I turned around and prepared to leave him in peace.
“A question if I might.”
“Yes?”
“The masters will use us from now on will they not?”
I came over and sat beside him.
“Of course.”
“And will all the battles be like that one?”
“I would think not. It is unusual that the shadows will be called upon in duels. Why do you ask?”
“Well…I have never been in battle before. Not like that, not with them.”
“What did you think?”
“It was…short.”
I laughed. “Well that is one way of putting it. I would not dwell on it though. Our time will come to fight for them again soon enough.”
***
“Was that any better?” I asked him when the duel with Dragon master's imposter was over.
“Honestly I found it rather boring I did not get a chance to do battle for our masters.”
“Do not worry about it. You will have other chances to help them. They have many more opponents to face before they reach their goal.”
***
Indeed the masters did play him again unfortunately his time in battle was as short lived as before.
“Do not be discouraged your time will come,” I tried to reassure him.
He answered me be spearing a small animal in the bushes with his sword. He put it over the fire I had created. The purple flames lapped at the body and he watched as the skin bubbled and cracked.
I sighed. “I can see I am not making you feel any better.”
“No, but I do thank you for trying. I understand that not everyone can be the deciding factor in the duel all the time or even be in a duel for that matter, and I know if the masters did not feel I was important part of the group they would not keep me in the deck, but I would give anything for a chance to prove myself. To be that hinging determinant between victory and defeat, as you have been.”
“Perhaps one day you will be.”
***
The duels continued and his time on the field continued to grow.
“You can not be disappointed this time you were quite involved with that duel.”
“Yes, but I do not particularly like being swallowed by a fifty foot worm with razor sharp teeth,” he said, and winced as I continued to clean the wounds.
“Well I did not particularly like being stuck under a damp musty hat, but we do what we must.”
“Is that what that smell is. I thought you were trying out a new cologne.”
“Very funny,” I said, punching him lightly in the arm careful to avoid the newly dressed cuts.
***
It was turning into a grand duel. My masters against him; their greatest rival, it was thrilling. I taunted him for a moment. Taking great pleasure in getting back at him for that defeat earlier, and then I took great pleasure in defeating his genie.
In an odd move his rival then put out the dark clown out in defence mode. Always the cautious ones my masters chose to have Gaia destroy him in case it was a trap. The trap turned out to be unavoidable as suddenly an intense pain filled me. I cried out, my vision blurred, and then everything went dark.
***
I awoke the heavy scent of herbs. I groaned and opened my eyes and was greeted by the sterile walls of the infirmary. I saw Mystic come over with a cup in her hands.
“Drink this and do not move from that bed.”
I slowly brought the drink to my lips. It tasted none too appetizing, but it did clear my vision enough to be able to see across the room. I did not like what I saw. Angry black clouds covered the sky, lighting lit up the rain that lashed against the windows; that meant only one thing, a loss.
Slowly from word of mouth the picture came together. Masters’ rival had summoned his most powerful beasts and combined them to from the ultimate dragon. As always the masters had pulled themselves back from defeat with Kuriboh of all things, victory looked assured. Then masters’ rival had forced their hand, made them choose between his life or their grandfather’s. Revived his dragon and won…when he defeated my friend. I had to find him. He was no doubt pounding himself over this.
Taking a chance when Mystic’s back was turned I snuck out of the tower and went in search of him. I found him in the weapons room, making a lifetime’s supply of toothpicks, his sword swinging at every angle and cursing out every deity under the sun. He stopped when I announced myself by dropping a shield on the stone floor.
“I-I did not hear you come in.”
“I am not surprised considering the distasteful words coming out of your mouth.”
He glanced down, embarrassed. His skin was covered in sweat, his hand shook as he held his sword and he was panting hard.
“You should not push yourself like this it is not good for you.”
“And you should not even be up,” he retorted.
“I know if Mystic catches me out of the infirmary there will be hell to pay.”
“You risked her wrath just to find me? I must be important to you then.”
I just nodded. Shocked he had put it in such blunt terms. I had not had the chance to fully comprehend our growing…companionship, but it seemed he had.
“You waste your time.”
Or perhaps not.
“I beg your pardon?”
He sighed and shook his head, “I let them down,” he said, and turned back to the wood. “It was weak not even a thousand strong and I stopped and stood there!” Woods chips flew everywhere as he swung in a frenzy. “I surrendered like an amateur! I let them lose!” he yelled. Enraged he brought his sword down slicing full through three posts. I came over a placed my hand on his shoulder.
“It was not your fault.”
“Yes it was! I-”
“You did the only thing you could do. I know how much pleasing the masters means to you. It means a lot to all of us, but you must not berate yourself into thinking you failed them today. If you had attacked they would have been distraught at the idea that they allowed another to be hurt for their victory. You only please them in a fair and honest battle. That duel was neither.”
He put his sword back in its sheath. “You are right as always.”
Suddenly overcome with dizziness I swayed and fell against the wall.
“Are you all right?”
“Just dizzy.”
“Just relax I have you.”
He picked me up and started walking. I allowed myself to go limp against the feeling of leather and tarnished metal. The last thing I remembered was the heavy scent of sweat.
***
Slowly I came back to myself pulling my mind away from the haze of my sub-conscious. I looked over to see my friend on the opposite side of the room cleaning weaponry.
“Good to see you are awake,” he said.
I slowly sat up only to fall back down again as the room spun. “Oh…my head.”
“Well I am not surprised you were summoned to duel.”
“I battled?”
“Indeed I believe the others are calling it the embarrassment of the millennia.”
“Then I consider myself lucky to have no memory of it.”
“If only others could be so fortunate. Demon alone has made it perfectly clear that if anyone so much as mumbles about it in his presence he will take great pleasure in removing their head from their neck and using it for target practice.”
We lapsed into silence as he went back to shaping his weapon. I looked about the room it was quite different from what I had expected. Oh, there were swords of every kind covering every inch of the walls, but the hangings on the bed on windows were deep blue. It seemed like me he had a fondness for darker colours. Here now in such close quarters I could not deny that he was very handsome. We both possessed a strong desire to please the masters and I did thoroughly enjoy his company. It had been so ling since…perhaps I could-no, no I could not indulge myself. My only goal was to help the masters; that was all. To even think that I could feel so close to someone else as I felt to him would be a betrayal.
***
They had almost succeeded, it was the final match. I looked at him from across the field and was shocked by what I saw. His eyes were full of emotion, but, but it was all wrong. There was nothing there for me. There was a desire for me to be free so he could defeat Pegasus but that deep desire was for the little master the one he called Yugi, not me. There was not even the faintest glimmer of our friendship from so long ago. Those full of drive, determination, and yet empty. I felt as though I had been slapped in the face. He does not remember.
He prepared the ritual and again I was summoned to his side as an offering. Soon after that I was surrounded by the haze and the countless tombstones. It was all up to him now. To say I was crushed would be an understatement I collapsed against a headstone.
All too soon he came through the fog, and I could not help but smile at him.
“That was nothing short of embarrassing, being defeated by a toon in a giant clam.”
“Oh, yes I am sure it was,” I answered, tracing one foot in the dirt.
“Is something wrong? You are not injured are you?”
“No.”
“If there is something I can do I would be only too happy to…”
He leaned in, I pulled back.
“I’m sorry I cannot. No matter how much I want to.”
“There is someone else?”
“I, I was once human just as the masters are now. Long ago when he called the sands of Egypt home. I still feel bound to him and my duty to him cannot be obscured by such personal fantasies.”
“I see, I always thought you had more of a connection to our masters than the rest of us I just never believe it could ever run as deep as that.”
“So you understand then?”
“No, but I will respect it.”
He turned away from me and left, leaving me to wallow in my sorrows.
***
I remembered and he did not. I remembered the friendship and the time it had become more, and all those times I had helped him. Stayed be his side, held him close to me.
“That man is a complete waste time and energy, why is it so important we do this?”
“We must it is for the good of your people.”
“I know it was a rhetorical question.”
“Ah, of course. Though you must admit he does have a certain affect on people.”
“Yes nausea.”
We ate in silence for the rest of the meal. I worried for him for he ate very little and appeared rather dazed. Still this was not the time to be bringing up concerns for his health.
The meeting continued. The foreigner rambling on about his demands and how he felt his country would help us in our time of need. I felt he was very condescending and arrogant about the whole thing, from what I could catch anyway. My mind was far more focused on my king. I watched him carefully and my concern for him only grew as I saw him fight to stay awake. I knew him well and although he may not have like the ruler and wished him nothing, but illness and drought he would not ignore the man on purpose like this. Something was wrong.
When the negotiations were finally at an end as gracefully as I could I shooed him out the door and onto his horse. Then dashed back inside to find Pharaoh and discovered him in the hallway sitting against the wall breathing heavily. I knelt down beside him and placed my hand against his face.
“You are warm, my pharaoh.”
“It is just the room.”
“No you are ill do not lie to me.”
He smiled weakly. “You always were very observant.”
“You should have cancelled the meeting.”
He shook his head. “No if had done that I would have come across as weak. Egypt would be seen as weak. I could not allow that, my people need the resources he can provide us in trade.”
“I understand, still it is not worth your health let me tend to you-”
“No! You are not to aid me like a common slave you know that. Just help me up I will be fine on my own.”
I gripped his arm and pulled him up and allowed him to steady himself on my shoulders. He took two steps forward and started to fall over. I grabbed him then putting one arm around his shoulders I let him lean against me and we walked to his room. I ignored his protests and lay him on his bed.
“Why do you always do this?”
“Because it is my pleasure to serve you and I do not wish to see in distress like this.”
“You can not cure me though you are not a healer.”
“No, but I can ease your pain,” I said gently moving his bangs away from his face.
I kissed him softly on the forehead only to have him take his hands and pulled me down until my lips crushed against his own. Quickly I came back to myself and pulled away.
“I have been too forward haven’t I?”
“My king it is inappropriate.”
“If the gods are willing I can make it un-inappropriate if you wish.”
I shook my head.
“No one has to know, Mahad.”
I was silent for several minutes grappled with indecision.
“Stay with me at least. The bed is big enough.”
I did.
That had been the start of our relationship as more than just Pharaoh and Priest. We were still completely professional in the presence of others, but behind closed doors everything was intimate. Many were the time I had lost myself in the feeling of dried tanned skin, the click of gold jewellery, the scent of spice. How I melted as his hands twisted themselves in my hair. I sighed with pleasure as the memories flooded back to me, big and small. Then I grimaced in pain as it dawned on me that only I had those memories now. To him I had never existed while he was my whole world. Yet it had been many millennia since those late nights and sun drenched mornings among his sheets, so why did it still hurt?! I should not have felt the need to be faithful to him to him anymore, but I did. Was this how he felt when I left him? So betrayed, so alone?
The celebrations went on without me I just lay in my room and fumed at the injustice of life. I could not go out, he would be there I did not want to face him not after what I had done. What I had begun to feel towards my friend I had never intended him to reciprocate. It had never even crossed my mind that he might, not fully, but he did and I had hurt him.
I left the castle and wandered to a small clearing in the woods behind it. I sat down by the pond that was there just staring into the water. I whispered his name, as I had done many times before, and the pond rippled to reveal him. To my eternal heartbreak though, this time I saw him entangled in the arms of his younger soul-mate, as he never wanted to let him go. So he had found someone new. Someone in his new life that would tend to him as I had, who would take my place, it wasn’t fair!
A noise shook me from my-self pity and I looked up to see him approach through the trees. By the master, but he is beautiful.
“How did you know where to find me?”
“I thought you had spent enough time alone; went to your room saw the empty bed and the open window, it was not hard.”
“You know me so well.”
“Do you come here often?”
“Not until recently.”
“Why?”
“I miss him.”
“Of course you do. You miss him so much you cannot even focus on everything you could have right now,” his eyes lowered in anger, “I will not compete with a memory if you want him so much then stay and watch that pond until the mountains wash away, but do not expect me to wait for you.”
I stared at him stunned and slowly turned back to the scene playing out on the surface of the water.
“So be it.”
With that he walked away. I stared at the water and noticed something strange; that was not the way he normally acted. He was usually so stoic and formal. That man was open and almost playful in his actions. So despite our promises it appeared I was not the only one who had changed, who had moved on.
The battles would be long and the chances for survival slim.
“But should you not come back?”
He grabbed me. I wrapped my arms around his slim waist.
“We’ll always be together won’t we?”
“If what the gods tell us of the after-life is true then yes.”
He lead his horse next to mine our legs touched one hand let go of the reins and wrapped around my shoulder as he kissed me hard.
He gave me a small smile when he pulled back. “It has to last until eternity.”
So I had. It had never occurred to me that he might move on, but he had and so had I. It was then I realized I wasn’t in love with him anymore. I was in love with the memory of a man who no longer existed. That person, dressed in chains and black leather, laughing, and tangled in his lover’s arms was not the man I knew. I had to let go. I could go to my friend tell him how sorry I was with there was something to be built on if I waited for him it would be in vain I knew that now.
Quickly I stood up and raced after him. “Wait! Please wait!”
He stopped and turned his head to look at me over his shoulder. “Yes?”
“I’m sorry you are right I cannot be with you and hold on to what I wish could still be. He is able to continue without those memories so I should be able to continue with them.”
“Do you truly mean it? You have been strutting around like you were better than everyone else because you have had a stronger connection to him than the rest of us. Now you want me to believe you have just abandoned it.”
“You are right I was nothing short of pompous. I was caught up in my desire to be loyal to him that I didn’t think about anyone could possibly feel how I felt. That you were just something to look at and could never think of me like that. Can you ever forgive me?”
“Of course I can you are my friend, as you know I desire to be more than that, but I will not push you. I do not want you to commit to me if you do not mean it.”
“I do mean it I just did not want to admit to myself that just because I was to serve him did not mean I could not have duties beyond that.”
He kissed me then and as I stood there I wondered why I had fought so hard against this, trying to run away from heaven. Quickly I kissed him back truly content now that my duty, both to my master and to myself, was fulfilled.
The End