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Jayce didn’t mind the snow.
In fact, he found it rather beautiful when it fell slowly on calm days, coating each rooftop and each inch of pavement in a fluffy but freezing-to-the-touch blanket.
He adored the festivity and holiday cheer that came with it, the warmth in the bigger picture.
Crystals adorned every surface, each skeleton of every tree, blinding under the morning rays. It made the world seem bright in cold times. Each snowflake sunkissed in the daylight.
But some winter days were not calm. Some days, harsh snow beat down on the windows. Some days, the only thing you saw when you glanced outside was the faint shadows in the distance and an icy wall of grey.
———————
Viktor had heard the story many times. Jayce, young, cold, in one of the worst snowstorms anyone had seen in decades. Mother freezing to death in his arms. It was tragic, terrifying. But Jayce treasured what saved his and his mother’s life, what inspired his interest in magic in the first place: the rune. Heat exiting the precious object as it fell into Jayce’s grasp, the action changing the course of his life.
Though, a connection to the Arcane was not all that came from an experience like that.
On peaceful, snowy days, Jayce made them hot chocolate. He brought extra blankets and lent Viktor sweaters that were a bit too big. He talked of ideas for holidays, it was good and it was okay.
On blizzard-ridden, glacial days… Jayce was restless. He got irritated easily, he lost track of his thoughts... his senses weren’t always in the moment. No matter how warm it was in the lab or his room, he was still so cold.
Mind always escaping back to the most terrifying day of his childhood, if not his entire life.
Viktor had caught onto this pretty early on in their first winter working together. The change in behavior was not an easy thing to miss. He was quieter, and rather shaky at times.
It became even more evident during their second cold term.
The freezing wind that plastered on glass and attacked citizens was already a thorn in Viktor’s side, his leg and his joints did not appreciate the icy conditions. And the man did not enjoy the dull ache said weather left him with.
But Viktor had hurried to the lab nonetheless, concerned for his partner in the wintry climate.
When he pushed open the door to their shared space, he found it rather… empty, at first.
But ragged breathing caught his attention. He could barely hear it over the rushing, howling winds outside.
Sure enough, it was Jayce. Almost backed into a corner. The look in his eyes akin to terror, it was unlike anything Viktor had ever witnessed from the man. He’d done his best to comfort Jayce, deciding against the usual urge to work the day away. It gave him a new sense of empathy towards his partner.
The situation was one Viktor wouldn’t forget. He’d stopped Jayce from having very bad panic attacks, shutdowns, and issues since then. He wasn’t upset about this.
He cared for Jayce deeply. It wasn’t a chore to help, though each moment he spent a witness to Jayce’s lingering trauma… was another moment he wished he could’ve prevented the man from ever going through such a thing.
———————
Today, Viktor woke early to the harshest winter conditions he’d seen in… well, ever? Maybe he was reaching. The point was, it was rough outside. Windows creaked from the force of the wind, and snow piled feet high in corners between buildings.
But Piltover’s finest scientists did not take snow days.
Viktor arrived at the lab. He expected an anxious Jayce, one he could settle. He expected a slower day, one where they were maybe a bit too close.
But when he entered…
Something was wrong.
A feeling, some damn kind of feeling, worried Viktor. He limped into the room before his eyes came to rest on a new sight. Jayce was… on the floor, hands in his hair, basically tucked into a ball. Knees to his chest, his fingers tugging at the now-loose brown strands, he was shaking, and Viktor wanted to rip his eyes away. His heart seemed to throb in his chest.
He felt empathy, affection and so much more come over him. He put the pieces together, eyes darting from the frosty window—wind billowing against it—and back to Jayce’s shrunken figure.
He rested his cane on the nearby desk, kneeling with a subconscious attempt to lean more on one leg than the other. Jayce had not taken notice of him yet.
“Jayce?” the name was spoken in a delicate tone, the most tranquil one he could manage right now.
Viktor rested his hand upon his partner’s knee.
Jayce jolted back, just an inch, panicked gaze briefly darting around.
You could see many thoughts race through Jayce’s mind, wide eyes that told of unspoken glimpses from a decades-old nightmare.
But he could process that Viktor was there.
“Hey, Jayce, look at me.”
His voice was not stern. A delicate command.
Jayce listened.
Viktor used a hand to touch Jayce’s, which grasped desperately at his hair, searching for a means to ground him.
He clasped it, and he removed it from the base of Jayce’s scalp.
Viktor could not stand to see his partner hurt himself.
A few seconds of silence lingered. Jayce’s hand in Viktor’s, Viktor trying to decide what to say next. How to help.
But only a few, before Jayce leaned forward and collapsed into Viktor’s arms, head on his shoulder.
“It’s okay Jayce, you’re okay,” Viktor was quick to murmur, an arm reaching around him now. His other hand stayed at the back of his head, thumb soothing over where Jayce had been pulling.
“You’re safe,” he assured, his heart snapping at its core from the feeling of Jayce… just crying, against him. Shaking. Hyperventilating. Coming apart. Viktor wanted nothing more than to make his partner feel like the safest man in the world, he wished he could rid him of his fear and his haunting memories. But he could not, this was the best he could do.
Tears dampened his vest but he did not care. Why should he care? The only thing he could possibly give a damn about right now was Jayce.
Viktor spoke softly, influencing comfort, quiet but soothing. Such utterances mixed with acts of kindly urging the man to breathe slow and deep, in and out.
Tender words crashed over Jayce’s hurdling thoughts like cool ocean waves, giving him a sense of stability. Jayce clung to that. He clung to the soft body that held him so dearly in a vulnerable moment.
Jayce calmed, after a while. His head was flooded with fewer memories he hated to bear witness to, his thoughts were not filled to the brim with a prayer for warmth and nothing else.
Viktor felt great relief as tears slowed and quivering subdued. He did not let go though.
Jayce lifted his head enough to shift his face visible. The other gazed upon his tired expression.
“Thank you,” he said after a few more minutes.
“It’s nothing,” Viktor replied.
But neither got up quite yet.
It was warm and it was comforting, them sitting together. Settling for both. So there they lay, on a cool lab floor, still holding onto each other like their lives depended on it. Jayce hummed a low note in an unthought-out response.