Chapter Text
Wukong's eyes never strayed far from Macaque when they were younger. When they were free and could hold each other's hands like it was nothing. Like the world wasn't trying to kill them. Like they weren't trying to kill them.
At first it was because of wonderment. The golden monkey had never seen anyone like him before and then there came this beauty with fur as white as the fluffy clouds above! Those enchanting amber eyes full of curious wisdom that yearned to be told. The monkey was more than willing to listen.
Soon it came because of awe. Now Shihou was powerful thanks to many years of fighting and training, but Liu'er Mihou was something else. He learned everything seemingly effortlessly! Everything he did seemed so effortless! It only made him want to prove himself to his Liu'er Mihou.
Then it was because of joy and love. What was there not to love? What was there not to become joyful and adventurous for?! Macaque, his beautiful Warrior of the Shadows, was far greater than him. More powerful than any of the Brotherhood dared think of! More than the Shadow had dared speak of. The Sage loved that humility the most.
Yet, those amber eyes never fell to him unless he did something. Usually something stupid, something rash and brazen. Something that caused trouble.
The white-furred monkey would look panicked and often cried when they got caught. If they didn't, they would whimper before laughing in excitement, clinging to the older one. He soon began helping to get him out of trouble.
Liu'er Mihou would scold Shihou, lightly smacking his back in frustration. Yet, his lips always quirked into his own mischievous grin as he happily helped cause and evade the trouble. Eventually, he began to drag Shihou into his own troubles with such a gleeful expression.
Macaque, in the beginning, took great joy in the trouble, but then a wariness began to infect his actions. His eyes growing with mistrustful glances and a growing annoyance. His pranks were no longer harmless, but painful for the Brotherhood. The Monkey King thought it funny, anything the Shadow did was funny or amazing it seemed. The Brotherhood held differing views.
Still, the Sage protected him from their wrath, boasting of their shared accomplishments. It did little to calm their hearts and minds of the Shadow, believing him weak and near useless.
Wukong didn't care about those hurtful words... Or maybe he did as he never tried too hard to prove them wrong. With their hateful and disbelieving words piercing the Warrior, all his attention was on the King, and Wukong loved it. Perhaps he could've gotten the same result even with telling the full truth, but he couldn't do it.
Why? Because he feared that should they give his Macaque the right respect, he would leave. Leave him for someone stronger and better, someone like Azure or Bull King.
And for the longest time, he was happy like that. Talking the other's ears off, clinging to him, showering him in both gifts and troubles. He did anything to make sure that his attention, focus, Macaque's everything was completely on him.
Then Sun Pilgrim killed him.
He tried to justify it, tried to deny it, forget it... But it wouldn't leave.
And so, after he sealed away his last friend, he was swept in a maelstrom of emotions. Chaotic and disastrous emotions.
Emotions that led him down a twisted and self-pitying spiral. The only good thing that came out of it was MK. How the boy was so much like him, how he tried in his own uncertain way to guide the boy from making the same mistakes.
Then Macaque appeared with righteous anger and vengeance on his mind. But oh how beautiful and enticing he was.
And Sun Wukong was deliriously happy! His Moon Monkey was focused on him, only he was on his mind. Sure, it was murderous and he hated him, but he was still there! Occupying a part of his mind every day.
But he should let him go. Should apologize because he never meant to. He never meant to kill his Moon Monkey. He never meant for things to get so far out of hand as they had.
But could he? Was he willing to risk Macaque leaving him forever? Would he able to risk the very thing that had nearly drove him mad?