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He sat bolt upright as he woke up in a cold sweat.
Ah. It was one of those nights
Max slowed his breathing down as his body caught up with the situation.
He looked around the bedroom. Old wooden floors, familiar polka dot curtains that were ever so slightly open. His and Sam's bunk beds that they'd been threatening to replace for a good sixteen years now as Max's was essentially always vacant.
Max took everything in as his heart began to slow down.
The feeling of the blanket in his fingers. The smell of detergent from the sheets. The quiet but audible creaking of the house settling around him.
He was home. He was safe. All that was double so, with the warm presence and slight snoring of his husband next to him. Sam's arm still lay over him slightly.
Max let out a sigh of relief.
This was his third night of nightmares. He let out a huff.
It was rare Max had nightmares nowadays. But whenever he did, they tended to cluster together, giving him a string of sleepless nights before finally bidding him adieu after a week or so. He just had to let them run their course.
Attempting to get back to sleep, Max pressed himself back into Sam's arms, the place he'd been before he was so rudely interrupted by his own dreams. Max was surrounded by the familiar smell of coffee and typewriter ink.
Sam let out a sleepy grumble, but happily accepted Max into his arms, nuzzling his snout into the top of Max's head as he enveloped the rabbit.
Max could hear his husband's heartbeat as he lay in his arms. It always helped.
Despite feeling calmer however, his mind still wandered back to his dreams.
It was mostly a blur, as they tended to be. No icy-electric-kaiju-dogs this time though, which was a relief at least. Max pressed himself closer to Sam as that thought crossed his mind.
No, they'd been of his family.
They'd all been vague, as his memories and dreams of his families tended to be. Flashes and blips of faces, screaming and yelling echoing vaguely around him as he was suddenly a tiny rabbit again, young and alone.
But he wasn't alone now.
Max pressed a small kiss to the underside of his husband's snout.
Sam let out a happy noise in his sleep.
Max curled into his husband's arms, trying to let sleep take him.
It didn't come of course, despite his attempts. Though being in Sam's arms helped immensely, his mind still wandered back to those dreams and memories.
The sequence of events and the events themselves were always fractured, only little bits making themselves known. The feelings though. They stayed. Crystal clear.
The feeling of being weak. Of being afraid. Of that it must somehow be his fault, because how or why else would any of this be happening? If he'd just done something differently, or been better or stronger or different then maybe...
After what he assumed was an hour, Max finally gave up on chasing sleep, letting out a sigh as he squirmed out of Sam's arms.
Sam gave an unhappy noise as he felt Max leaving his grip.
Max have him a quick kiss on his snout and a scratch on his ear, whispering a promise to be back as soon as he could.
That seemed to satisfy Sam as he ceased his grumbling.
Max laughed quietly. The big lug.
Max swung his legs off the bed, landing as softly as he could on the creaky floorboards.
He slipped out their bedroom door, making a beeline for the kitchen.
Living the suburban white picket fence dream definitely had it's perks, though Max sometimes did miss their old apartment with all its amenities in one room. Having to plod across an entire house for a glass of water could be a pain at times like this.
It would be a bit hard to raise a kid in a one room apartment though.
Max prepared to slip as quietly as he could past the door next to their bedroom, a sign taped to it saying "Geek".
At least he would've, if he hadn't heard the TV playing in the living room.
Huh.
Max cancelled his trip to the kitchen, making his way to the living room.
In the living room, as he'd been expecting, was Geek.
She was on the sofa, blanket across her legs as she flicked mindlessly through TV channels. Though staring directly at the TV, her eyes seemed glazed, her mouth set in a hard line.
Guess he wasn't the only one in the family having one of these nights.
Max plodded into the living room, letting his presence be known.
Geek didn't turn her gaze away from the TV, but let out a small noise of acknowledgment at Max's presence.
Max hopped up onto the sofa next to her.
"What'cha watching?"
"I don't know, some shitty infomercials"
"Hey, watch your fucking language."
That got a small snort from her.
"Mind if I watch shitty infomercials with ya?"
"Knock yourself out, it's mostly just crappy jewelry and old people falling out of chairs though."
Max let out a snort of his own.
Max sat next to Geek, both of them absentmindedly watching TV and listening to the clock tick by on the wall.
Max resisted the urge to ask Geek what was wrong. It was incredibly tempting, but he'd learned the hard way that addressing anything bothering Geek head on often wasn't the way to go when talking to her. She was similar to Sam in that way, he thought fondly.
No, best to just let her come and tell him and Sam in her own time. It required patience, even if Max absolutely loathed having to be patient.
So, Max kept his trap shut, quite a feat for him he thought to himself, as he watched shitty infomercials with Geek.
Well, half watched them. The other half of his attention wandered around the living room, mostly to its various pictures. They littered the walls densely, the majority being of him and Sam on cases, but there was a good few others in there too.
A picture of his and Sam's first wedding was up there. They'd gone for a more traditional affair the first time round, for the ceremony at least. Max fiddled with his wedding band fondly.
Another photo, the day they'd officially adopted Geek, hung proudly center stage. Geek appeared to be rolling her eyes, but was smiling nonetheless as she was boxed in by the two of them in the photo.
Max liked that photo.
It took less time than he thought it would, all things considered. After half an hour, Geek broke the silence without warning.
"Hey Max?"
"Hmm?"
"Can I ask you something stupid?"
"Wasn't that already a stupid question?"
"Oh shut up Max." She said.
Oops. Sam was always better at this stuff than him.
"Stupidness aside, go ahead kid." He said, trying to reel it back.
Geek hesitated, before continuing.
"Max, how do you deal with nightmares?"
Ah.
"Depends what they were about. Stuff that's happened before, stuff I'm afraid will happen, or just plain ol' scary stuff. What was it?"
"The first one" Geek said quietly.
"Makes sense why you'd ask. Why's it a stupid question though?" Max asked, turning his head quizzically.
"Cause y'know, duh. Its over now."
Max continued to look at her, prompting her to continue. She looked down at her hands in her lap, absentmindedly twiddling her thumbs.
"I'm safe now." She said, staring down at her hands.
"I'm with you and Sam now. It's all over. It's been over for like, a year. So why am I still having stupid nightmares about it?" A hint of frustration had entered her voice.
"Everything is fine now, so I should be fine, right?" She gripped the blanket in frustration
Max shuffled slightly closer to her, turning to face her better. She didn't move away.
He felt remarkably out of his depth. Sam was always better at stuff like this. But like hell he wasn't going to try.
"I think you might be being a bit harsh on yourself, kid."
"But I should be fine!"
"Should you?" Max asked.
Geek went quiet.
"I don't live with them anymore. I've got you and Sam and my bedroom and my lab and everything is good now and I should be fine but...I'm not."
Max stayed quiet, letting her continue.
"I still get nightmares about them. And I hate it because it's like I'm there again. I'm locked in my room again, because I've done something that upsets them or annoys them or..." She let out a quiet sniff.
Max moved to cover one of her hands with his own. She didn't move away.
"I know none of it was my fault. But it doesn't feel like that. It always just feels like, maybe if I was smarter, or if I'd just been happy being a boy, or maybe if I'd behaved differently then I could've..." she let out a hiccup as the tears started to flow freely.
"I just...I should be okay now! Is this just another thing I'm messing up? How do I know know if I'm gonna be okay in the future if I can't even be okay now..."
Max moved instinctually, sitting next to her and putting an arm around her shoulder. He did so cautiously, just in case she wanted space. Geek welcomed it however, laying her head on his shoulder as she let out another hiccup.
Max swore she'd gotten a little taller when he hadn't been looking. He had to shift his arm upwards slightly to put it around her shoulders.
Max felt pride at that. Pride, and annoyance that he'd once again be the shortest.
𝘏𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢𝘥𝘷𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘦, 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘭𝘺 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘺𝘦.
"I get it, kid. Well, I'm obviously never gonna get it exactly, cause I can't read your brain, but believe me when I say I get it."
He hugged her tighter. "I know it ain't gonna help the nightmares, but just know, you're perfect the way ya are to us, yeah? Your old folks were complete and utter morons beyond comprehension if they thought for a second you weren't perfect, just the way ya are."
Geek sniffed, but wrapped an arm around Max, reciprocating the hug.
" 'Sides, you're ours now, no takesies-backsies. We even got the paperwork to prove it." Max said firmly. He felt Geek laugh a little.
They sat in silence for a moment, the television humming on in the background as Max gathered his thoughts.
"You ain't stupid for not feeling safe or having nightmares, Geek. After everything your brain went through, are you really surprised it's still high strung?" He gave her shoulder a squeeze.
"I'd give anythin' to reverse all the stuff that's happened to ya. But don't get mad at yourself for not being okay, okay?"
" 'Sides, being okay doesn't mean stuff never bothers you ever again. Okay means that yeah, it's still there, but you know you've got it. But if you don't got it, thats fine too."
Geek wiped her eyes.
"Will it ever get easier?"
Max tilted his head in thought, before nodding slowly.
"From personal experience, it does. It's all still there, of course. But you begin to learn what works for dealing with it when it rears its head. Even if that's just taking it as it comes, one day at a time. Sometimes ya just gotta ride it out till it's over unfortunately."
"It just...I feel like I'm back there, sometimes. Like it's happening all over again, even if I know in my head it's over."
"Yep, sounds about right. I tend to try and take stock of what's around me. Sight smell, what I hear, all that crap. Reminds me where I am. Also hard not to do the hearing part with Sam's snoring."
That got another snort.
"Unfortunately, sometimes ya just gotta ride it out and remind yourself where you are. Remind yourself you are safe, even if ya sure as hell don't feel it. "
"That helps me, at least. If ya ever need a helping hand though, just wake me or Sam up yeah?"
She tightened her hug on Max. He was beginning to feel remarkably like a plush toy.
"For all the feelin crap though, about doin' things different...that bits a lot harder."
Geek gave a nod, seemingly in agreement.
"It never should've been on you to act or be a specific way just to not get hurt. The fact you were in that situation at all means it was their fault, not yours. It's not your fault, Geek. It never was."
Geek sniffled again.
"You have it too, then? Nightmares? Even thought you're fourt-"
"Don't finish that fuckin' sentence. Also how the fuck do you know how old I am?"
"Max, I help you and Sam file taxes. Of course I know all your details."
"Little shit."
That got a genuine laugh out of her.
"But to answer your question..." He continued.
"Yeah. I get 'em too. My folks could often be...far from great, so to speak. It never really leaves ya, but it gets a little easier. At the very least, ya get a little better at dealing with it."
Geek nodded affirmatively, seemingly a little calmer.
The two spoke little after that, letting the TV go drone on in the background. Max felt Geeks breathing slow, her eyes seemingly struggling to stay open more and more, her head still on his shoulder. His arm was going dead, but he didn't mind.
"Ya can go to sleep if you want, kid. I ain't goin' anywhere."
"Thanks Max."
Finally, she shut her eyes, sleep seemingly beginning to take her.
He gave her shoulder one last squeeze.
"Night Geek."
"Night Dad."
Max fell asleep soon after.
No bad dreams followed.
Sam woke up when a beam of light hit his eyes through a gap in their curtains.
Oops, must've forgotten to close them properly.
Sam sat up and rubbed his eyes, looking around the bed and noticing a severe lack of lagomorph.
Max must've gotten up in the night. Sam hoped he was alright.
Sam made his way out of their room, taking care to slip past Geek's room quietly as he could.
He heard the TV on in the living room. He supposed Max must've been catching up on late night TV.
He made his way to the living room, catching sight of the remote on the floor as he entered, picking it up and flicking the TV off.
Instead of just a lagomorph on the sofa however, there was a human too.
Geek and Max were together on the couch, Geek asleep on Max's shoulder, Max resting his head on hers.
Sam smiled, using the blanket still on the sofa to cover them both.
He planted a kiss on his husband and daughters heads, before heading to the kitchen to make breakfast.