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You did not remember closing your eyes. You didn't remember opening them, either, though given the void, you probably hadn't. Just a black, inky void, blank as the night sky. Until you heard that voice.
"You're asleep again?" she asked, a certain formality to it you identified with. Despite what you were. You felt yourself turn around and around, but no matter how much you felt your body move, the scenery didn't change. You saw nothing. But you could speak.
"I'm... sorry, do I know you?" you asked like an idiot.
"Maybe you did. At one point. In here, you do. They do." You were afraid. Like usual. You put on that air of confidence you tried to copy from the others you'd met, but you just sounded like a puppy barking at the top of its tiny lungs.
"What do you want from me?" She laughed again, that voice.
"Oh, nothing much. Same as I usually do when nothing's happening, I suppose. Just to sit and watch. Heh... You used to be so afraid to talk to me and now look at you. Coming up to me as if you own the place."
"Well, this is... MY head, is it not? I'm asleep, where else would we go?" She laughed again. A haughty, irritating sound. It didn't annoy you as much as it scared you. Then again, you were scared of so much that was harmless, were you not?
"There are plenty of other places to go when you're asleep, dearie," she said. You felt your face twitch into a grimace.
"Don't call me that."
"I will do as I please."
"In my own head?"
"In a place where you hold much less purchase than you believe you do." You would have recoiled if you had a body in the moment.
"Why...? What gives me any less purchase over myself?"
"Oh, dearie." That voice dripped with pity. Like a mother telling a toddler they couldn't play with the matches because they'd set themself on fire. Maybe her voice would have been as soothing as any mother's. Once upon a time. "Look at yourself. Look at what you are. Don't you remember where you woke up? What we did? Together?"
"No. I don't--"
"No, out there, you don't. But in here? In here, we're together. And you've seen it all. And with the rising of the sun, you open your eyes and your mind tucks it all away in a place you can't access. The body remembers, though. Isn't that odd? The way the body remembers but the mind forgets? How you wake up sweating, panting, and screaming, trying to push your way back into your own mind while our words ring true?"
"Our? I have no part in what you do. I don't even know who or what you are!" You felt yourself finally reaching that anger. Only for her to snatch it away.
"You know full-well who I am. Maybe your mind is soothed enough to spare you the scenery but I know you know. You remember. In here, you do, at least. You remember so little, what can you really trust of what you do and don't know?" She rendered you speechless. You couldn't answer her. "You think you've changed."
"I know I have."
"You have no basis for what you were before. How would you know?"
"I remember who I was before I got to Hollowvale." She scoffed.
"Hollowvale... Yes, the town of empty promises. The town where you indulge in all your sick fantasies and then claim you're above them all."
"I indulge nothing..."
"Don't lie to me. I can see everything you've done. You know I can."
"No, I DON'T."
"Yeeeees, you do. I see all the siphoning you do. How eager you are to do so, even out of Hell. On that train, you went right to it. To siphoning off of a child, of all people."
"I... I didn't know--"
"That wouldn't have stopped you. Not at all. You would have done so anyway if you knew. You were ready to do it again if he tried to kill that stupid clown. I can feel it, same as you" Your entire being grew hot.
"You say whatever you want about me, but if you speak of my friends that way, I'll--"
"You'll what? Hurt me? Kill me? I thought you wanted to live. To keep this second chance." The heat died down everywhere except for your face. You remembered. She was right. You didn't know how exactly but she was right. You couldn't kill her if you wanted to live. "Just as you couldn't enter that grave without dying. Again."
"How do you--"
"We are far more intertwined than you think. And when you wake up, you'll have no clue about any of it. Just like always. I suppose that's a nice thing about our arrangement. I can watch you in here from time to time, I can know everything you are, and yet you can't do a thing about it. Even that hummingbird you keep around won't be able to change a damn thing. I'd never let her see us like this. She'd never see me like this. Though... What's there to see, right?" You felt your hand twitch, though when you looked down, you did not see a hand. You had no body. Just the same black void.
"She'll find a way." That voice laughed again.
"It'll do its best."
"We're in MY brain. I have control. I'll show Her what I want."
"If you did, then why am I here? Why am I the one who facilitates what you see and remember at night? You don't even know what to show her. You don't know what she's looking for nor what you want her to find."
"Leave, then, if it's such a bother. Tell me how to rid myself of you and I'll do it. I can't guarantee it'll be painless or kind, but I will help you out as you let me in." She chuckled.
"Now you remember?"
"I remember enough."
"Huh... I wasn't counting on that. I must admit. As for my departure, I wish I could. Oh, how I wish I could be out of here. But like I said, we are far too intertwined. You need me. As I need you, unfortunately."
"I don't need you."
"Yes, you do. You did then and you do now. Whether you realize it or not. And I suppose I enjoy staying around to watch the show. Don't worry. There's not enough power in here for me to take control."
"Exactly."
"Ohhh, listen to you. You think you're so big and strong now because it appears you have me beat? Tsk, tsk, my dear. Don't forget who brought you here. Don't forget who made you this. A force to be reckoned with. You had nothing when you came to me."
"I had--I... I had..." She laughed again. You were once again rendered speechless. Truth be told, you didn't remember exactly who she was, but her voice filled you with an angry fear that drove your heart and your tongue. All at once, thoughts filled your head. Thoughts that were not yours.
When you awoke again, you sucked in a desperate breath. You clutched your legs and began to shake as words you would never remember unless someone recounted them to you like last time poured from your mouth. By the time it was over, you were left in the dark. Just like always.