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Only hours had passed since the rain started pouring in waves, yet it seemed like a lifetime ago. Cold unrelenting precipitation pounded on the roof in a steady stream of dreary weather, the clouds gray and sighing as they released their depression upon the night sky and cities below. Miles Edgeworth was visiting Phoenix Wright, which was now a more common occurrence than he had suspected it would become.
Phoenix cradled a warm cup of tea in his hands, nursing it as he sat cross-legged on the floor, a game of Clue set in front of him. Trucy and Miles were seated around it as well, huddled together in Phoenix’s apartment in the safest corner they could find to shelter from the storm. The tea was chamomile and they were early into the game, and Miles’s eyes kept shifting to Phoenix’s when he thought the other man wasn’t looking.
“I think it was Professor Plum in the Library with the candlestick!” Phoenix declared confidently, settling the evidence around his pawn. When his suggestion was proved false by a sympathetic Trucy, he groaned light heartedly and ruffled her hair. “Better luck next time eh?” He said rhetorically, and it was Miles’s turn.
Miles made a note on his game pad and rolled a six on the board. As he moved his piece, the thunder outside crackled harder and a flash of lightning could be seen in the distance. Trucy immediately started counting from the next thundering noise outside, remembering the rule of thumb for calculating how far away lightning is.
“Daddy! The lightning is 20 miles away!” Trucy informed.
Phoenix put down his mug to wrap his arm around his daughter as she snuggled closer to him, her folded legs squeezed next to his right one, leaning into him as if he were a shield.
“Shhh, don’t worry Trucy-doll,” Phoenix reassured her with a comforting squeeze on her shoulder. “We’ll be alright. The lightning’s not expected to hit us. We’ll just wait until the storm’s over. Until then, we can continue playing anything you want, alright?”
“Mhm,” Trucy mumbled as she buried her face into her father’s shoulder.
Miles took this moment to glance up at Phoenix and take a sip from his own mug, full of earl gray, no sugar, with some milk. Trucy had a hot chocolate which she had finished incredibly quickly, giving her a short burst of energy Miles suspected would not be entertained long before her inevitable crash. The warmth of the drinks wasn’t entirely effective in protecting the three of them from the freezing temperatures outside, but they were here and they were together and that was enough.
Miles decided to make a suggestion he knew would be entirely inaccurate, simply because he had barely any information at all. It seemed that poker was not the only game Phoenix was good at; Miles was struggling to collect enough clues to provide him with a concrete accusation. At this rate, Phoenix would win.
His first win in a while, probably, Miles thought guiltily. Phoenix’s disbarment still weighed heavily on his mind, and he assumed it held the same position in the other man’s conscious. Miles could still remember the moment, he was waiting, watching in the audience, cheering his acquaintance on. Then, the faulty evidence was presented, the slip of paper that would cause the downfall of the previously esteemed ace attorney.
It was a dark day, Miles couldn’t recall all of the details, they blurred together into the past three months. The initial visit to the apartment, the clutter all over the floor. Empty cans, pizza boxes, assorted takeout containers, a kitchen deserted. Laundry lazily draped over an overcrowded couch, even the neglected state of the plants, wilted and dreary. He found Phoenix in his bedroom, unshaven, looking as if he hadn’t eaten in days.
The bathroom that afternoon was cold, Phoenix admitted to his not keeping up with the heating bill. However, Miles hands were warm on his face as they applied shaving cream and later, on his scalp, washed his hair, brushed it, softly as if with an injured animal. Phoenix thanked him for coming over.
They hadn’t spoken much since then.
Therefore, when Phoenix adopted a young daughter, Miles’ surprise couldn’t be overstated. He felt almost a pang of jealously that he hadn’t been informed earlier; he only learned of the news when he came to visit one day and a young girl had answered the door. It had been a cause for concern at first, if Phoenix couldn’t take care of himself, how could he be expected to take care of a child? However, it hadn’t taken long for Miles to realize that Trucy was Phoenix’s light, his reason to keep going. He absolutely adored her, and so of course, Miles did as well.
Now, she was sleeping softly, her head resting on Phoenix’s thigh, her arms wrapped close like a makeshift pillow, legs sprawled. She was a quiet sleeper, so the two men hadn’t noticed her slowly drifting away.
“Trucy-doll,” Phoenix prodded her lightly. “It’s your turn.”
“No, let her be,” Miles insisted. “I…How are you doing?”
“Oh,” Phoenix hesitated. Then he chuckled softly, “I’m fine, don’t worry. We’re holding up, Trucy and I. She’s a strong kid, a little stubborn but she’s so creative and full of joy…I don’t deserve her, honestly-“
He was interrupted by a hand on his shoulder. Looking up, his eyes were caught in those of Miles Edgeworth, and it was clear he could tell Phoenix was bluffing, just as he had many times before.
“I didn’t ask about Trucy, Wright. How are you?”
A bottle of wine was poured between them, ruby red in one glass and one plastic orange cup. The two men sat at a granite counter which divided the small kitchen from the living space. Trucy rested on the sofa, in a deep slumber; she hadn’t even flinched when Phoenix lifted her onto the space Miles helped him clear.
“I could only get the cheap stuff,” Phoenix confessed apologetically, taking a sip out of his cup, his eyes shifting as if he couldn’t even look at Miles’s face.
“Oh really? I couldn’t tell,” Miles lied. The drink had a clearly different flavor profile than the type Franziska typically bought for him whenever she visited from Germany, but it didn’t hurt to be polite.
Phoenix chuckled. “You know you can’t get away with bluffing to the master of it, right?”
Miles smiled tentatively. “It was worth a shot.”
“I appreciate it.” Phoenix sighed and took a sip. There was quiet for a while, a calm, awkward but understanding silence while the storm roared outside. A crack of thunder echoed across the sky, lightning following it shortly. In the building next door the glow of neighbors’ bedside table lamps and overhead lights turned off, succumbing to darkness.
The dim lights in the kitchen flickered a few times before they too became a victim of the unrelenting weather. The heater placed in the corner of Phoenix’s living room powered down as well, and soon not even the soft electrical buzzing of the fridge could be heard, only the background radio static of rain on rooftops.
“Shit,” Phoenix muttered curtly under his breath. The whole apartment was now enclosed in darkness. He could barely make out Edgeworth’s face in front of him, let alone Trucy’s sleeping frame on the sofa. “What do we do now?”
Miles got up and started rummaging around, looking for flashlights, snacks, and any other materials they would need to go into further lockdown. Phoenix picked up on this too and opened up the kitchen drawers which resulted in the finding of one battery charged lantern.
“Do you have any smaller room in here that we could shelter in?” Miles asked. He knew it was a long shot, after all it wasn’t like they were in a penthouse by any means, but Phoenix gave a half nod.
“We could probably use the closet,” he suggested.
“Won’t that be a bit small?” Miles questioned skeptically.
“It’s the best we have,” Phoenix replied.
Well, Miles realized, he was resigned. That was that. He nodded to Phoenix reluctantly, signaling that he would take the supplies to the closet while Phoenix picked up Trucy, her small limbs hanging lazily over his surprisingly strong forearms. Miles felt the heat rise from his cheeks suddenly, not quite sure as to why.
The closet was a cozy fit, but the three of them made it work after placing the lantern between them and the other supplies in the corners. Phoenix had the wise idea as to bring a few pillows; Miles’s back thanked him for it. Trucy was somehow still asleep on Phoenix’s leg and Miles was suddenly very aware of the closeness between him and the other man. He was relieved that the black-out made it so Phoenix couldn’t see the rising blush across his face.
“You comfortable?” Phoenix asked. Even in the nearly pitch-black dark, Miles’s eyes adjusted to see the scruff of Phoenix’s facial hair; it was evident he hadn’t shaved in a while. The warmth of his breath came with a faint scent of wine on it.
Miles cleared his throat before responding, “Yes, quite. Excuse me.” His head whirled.
“That’s good,” Phoenix commented, then paused. Miles could never tell what he was thinking during these pauses, and they confused him as much as Phoenix’s determination in the courtroom had both scared and enticed him. The past few months must have changed him pretty drastically, Miles thought, he never had a habit of keeping so many secrets to himself before.
“Hey, Edgeworth?” Phoenix said, after a while. “Why’d you still come to visit me?” He said this in a casual tone, as he had most other things, but there was a lingering feeling of melancholy that followed it. The question hung in the air for a few moments, weighing on Miles’s shoulders as he considered his response.
Because, he realized, the thing was…there were so many reasons. The history they shared, because Miles saw Phoenix as a friend, not just an acquaintance, because Phoenix was one of the first people Miles opened up to about his father, because even when Miles was about to give up, Phoenix wouldn’t. Because Phoenix’s cheesy, sheepish smile was the reason Miles woke up to go to work on days he otherwise felt too tired for, because the determination Phoenix demonstrated throughout all areas of his life, but especially with the ones he strove to protect, ignited a similar fire in the prosecutor. Because Miles knew what it was like to be down on one’s luck, and he wanted to extend the same courtesies to Phoenix that he wished he had gotten. So, so, so many reasons.
Of course, he didn’t say a single one of these out loud. To do so would to put a burden on the other man’s heart that he didn’t want to be responsible for, much less to explain. So, instead he said,
“I…thought you might need some help with the bills. And taking care of Trucy, of course. As a sort of repayment, to all the times you helped me.” He looked cautiously at Phoenix, gauging the other man’s reaction, and was surprised to see it more sullen than he had expected.
“Ah, I see,” Phoenix replied. “Well, thank you, I probably needed that.” His grin this time felt more artificial than to what Miles was accustomed, and he had the sinking feeling that he had said something the exact opposite of what he was meant to. “But you know that you don’t need to repay me, Edgeworth. We’re friends aren’t we?” In his eyes there was a look of searching, which, though not obvious, was clear to Miles.
“Yes, of course Wright, if that’s what you’d label it,” he choked out.
“Well what about you?” And in this question there was more of a demand, a need to know, to understand. Phoenix looked up, away from Miles’s prying gaze as he attempted to get his thoughts in order as to why Phoenix was suddenly so insistent upon the idea.
“I’d…I’d say so as well,” Miles responded, and it was true. He did see Phoenix as a friend, one of his closest companions in fact. However, he didn’t know why he was being asked this question now of all times, in the middle of the evening during a raging storm, which only seemed to get worse by the minute, if the pounding on the roof was any indication. “I didn’t mean to be callous in my phrasing. I did come to visit you to check up on your well-being as well,” he explained, hoping to clear the strange tension in the air.
“You could have just said so,” Phoenix said slyly. “I have to play enough guessing games now, don’t become one of them. Although you were always pretty difficult to figure out…”
“I was not,” Miles retorted indignantly. “You simply had trouble understanding.”
“Because of your phrasing! You’re not as straightforward as you think you are.” He laughed, but it was fond and humorous instead of brazing, and Miles felt more endearing towards it than offended.
“I’m aware I’m not always the best in terms of cushioning my statements…” Miles replied sheepishly. “But you understood what I meant, yes?”
“I did. I always understood what you meant. You just made it really difficult sometimes though, y’know?” Phoenix closed his eyes as if he was thinking very hard, or perhaps just reflecting on the other anecdotes he had of Miles Edgeworth’s peculiar phrasings.
“I apologize for any confusion,” Miles said awkwardly. He knew he wasn’t always the most emotional in his delivery but he didn’t find himself more inclined to miscommunication. In fact it was Phoenix he had trouble understanding sometimes. “Don’t act like I’m the only one responsible for that though.”
“Oh I’m well aware,” Phoenix sighed. Before Miles was left to determine whatever the hell that meant, he spoke again. “Hey, want me to fix that for you?”
Miles flushed again. “What do you mean by that?”
Phoenix opened his eyes and crooked an eyebrow, looking to Miles. “What do you think I mean by it?”
Miles wasn’t quite sure, so he kept his eyes locked in front of him, not even glancing to his side because he could feel the heat of Phoenix’s stare on his back and suddenly everything he was feeling was as uncommunicable as it had been three years prior. “It doesn’t seem quite fair to solve your communication issues by making me play guessing games, does it?”
“I guess not, but it’s easier,” Phoenix slung his arm over his knee. “And hey, it’s our communication issues.”
“Ours,” Miles repeated silently to himself in agreement. “However; despite them, shall I make an attempt? That is…how are you, really?” A concern shone in his eyes that hadn’t translated before when they had sat round the small table with their two glasses. It caused Phoenix’s words to hitch in his throat, before he could distract himself or lightly joke about one of the issues that in reality kept him up at night.
“It’s been…rough,” Phoenix admitted, a noticeable shift in his tone catching Miles off guard. He knew Phoenix wasn’t in his best state of mind, certainly not physically either, but the thickness of his voice and the slouch to his posture really made him the look the part of the haggard man he was. In the corner of the dark closet he appeared even smaller, the once undefeated lawyer known for his bolstering confidence brought to rock bottom and curled up to hide inside of himself.
“I thought I knew what I was doing, at first,” he continued. “Y’know, during the trial, I had…I had everything! And it all came crashing down on me,” he chuckled darkly. “The pride before the fall, I guess. And then the next few days were the worst, I mean, my absolute lowest. But then I found Trucy, and she made each day a bit better but I still wasn’t able to make ends meet and all I could think was…god, all I could think was, I’m such an awful father.” At this point tears had formed in his eyes, one leaking gently down his cheek as he rubbed his eyes red, his knuckles clenched as if protecting himself against a physical fight instead of one merely against himself, against the wave of all too familiar emotions crashing down upon him.
Phoenix kept talking and Miles listened, through the ups and downs of the past two years, of Miles’s two visits that smelled like old takeout and shaving foam. Miles listened while Phoenix spoke of his nights at the Borscht Bowl Club, gambling a habit he picked up and still hadn’t been able to break. The first time he was able to take Trucy out and buy her something of her own. The story of the beanie he made sure to wear every single damn day to show her how much he appreciated it. Miles listened to it all. Through the tears and the confessions and the occasional dark humored joke, he listened, not interrupting even to agree or make a lighthearted comment or do even more than a nod and a smile.
“I’m so glad you came to see me,” Phoenix concluded. He looked up then, towards Miles, and his eyes shown with admiration or grief or gratitude or something else, or maybe a combination of all four, a bittersweet twinkle composed of tears and loss and the voicemails from a friend left to let you know there’s food in the fridge, or that your favorite show is doing reruns on TV.
Miles sat closer to him, so that they sat shoulder to shoulder. He was never one for much physical touch, but his friend was in a time of need for gods sake, and he hoped it’d be a comfort to have him there, at least for a little bit. “I’m glad to see you too,” he whispered, soft but just loud enough for Phoenix to hear.
They sat like that for a while, Phoenix’s head slouching to move onto Miles’s shoulder, the alarms in Miles’s head slightly going off for a reason he couldn’t ascertain other than the potentially life threatening storm they were in, and the fact that he didn’t want to disturb Phoenix by moving even one muscle.
Finally, Phoenix got up, gently moving Trucy to the side to do so, waiting until she curled herself around a new cushion before placing his hand on the doorknob. “I’m going to go get another glass of wine,” he said to Miles, tiredly. “Be right back.”
“Get one for me too, please.” Miles said. He knew it was a bad idea, they both did. Phoenix had just broken down in front of him, and yet he couldn’t deny that maybe the solution was to get slightly tipsy in a closet together. The idea made him feel drunk all on its own, and he hadn’t even taken a sip yet.
“You in for a long night too, huh? Roger that,” Phoenix replied, opening the door by a smidge as to not let too much light in and blind Miles or possibly wake Trucy. Miles could hear the other man’s footsteps outside on the tile floor of the kitchen and the sound was oddly comforting, as if he was used to hearing it multiple times before.
When Phoenix returned with two glasses and the bottle, Miles raised an eyebrow. “Absolutely not,” he clucked.
“What? I won’t overdo it,” Phoenix promised half heartedly.
Instead of disagreeing, which Miles knew would only invite more conflict, he reached out to take the bottle from Phoenix’s grasp. “I’ll pour,” he explained, and that was met with no resistance. Phoenix handed over the bottle and lended Miles his cup. Miles poured the wine and watched it smoothly spill into the comically small vessel.
Once he had his own glass halfway full, he took a sip and looked over to Phoenix again, watching the way he drank, how his eyes drooped with stress or tiredness or both, how the one stubborn strand of hair fell in his face. How his hair was already starting to grey at the temples, how the shadows under his eyes made his face gaunt, how the scruff of his chin looked prickly so that Miles wanted to run his fingers over it just to feel it.
“Guess I look pretty pathetic, huh?” Phoenix asked.
“No, it’s perfectly reasonable for someone in your…situation to act this way,” Miles answered honestly, still tiptoeing around the all too obvious facts.
“You’re too nice, Edgeworth, really. I don’t deserve you.” He laughed, startling Miles. “Hah! You know, for some time I thought I’d never be able to say that. But it’s true,” he smiled sadly. “Hey, pour me another one will you?”
Miles considered it, but then took in the flicker in Phoenix’s eyes, his slight off-kilter balance. How much had he already had to drink, even before Miles arrived?
“No, Wright” he said sympathetically.
“Please?” Phoenix asked again. “Edgeworth, I’m not a lightweight you know that.”
Miles did, in fact, know that. A fact he had witnessed firsthand when he had invited Phoenix out for a night of karaoke, which was a tradition in the von Karma household. However, Phoenix did have a habit of going a little too hard, oftentimes at Larry’s encouragement. He never forgot to bring it up, annoyed, whenever Phoenix suggested another round, but he secretly enjoyed that night. He didn’t bring this up now, as he figured it’d be improper of him, but he still smiled at the memories of having to carry Phoenix out of the bar, grumbling and moaning, entirely dependent on him.
“Oh please, as if you weren’t falling all over me the last time we went out,” Miles recalled fondly.
“What time? I can’t remember.” Phoenix’s ensuing grin demonstrated he could remember, and quite well. “Anyway, so what? You enjoy it?”
Miles flushed bright red at that and hurried to change the topic. “Do you recall how we were made to leave the establishment after Larry started utterly embarrassing himself to impress that woman he found attractive?”
Phoenix laughed. “Or the way you screeched at the karaoke bar?”
“Excuse me,” Miles protested, “It’s tradition! I wasn’t horrible, anyway.”
“Ehhh…” Phoenix chuckled harder as Miles gave him a stern glare. “Only joking!”
“You’re only saying that to save yourself, but I’ll let you off easy this time,” Miles said amicably.
“You know, you’re pretty fun when you’re not so uptight, Edgeworth. You should try to loosen up more.” Phoenix commented thoughtfully.
“Hm, are you providing an invitation?” Miles asked, half-jokingly. Startled, he covered up for it with a light cough that was far from convincing.
“Depends, do you want it to be?” Phoenix asked. His arms were draped over his knees, his fingers fidgeting with eachother. This was the first time Miles noticed he seemed uncertain since the boosted (even for him) confidence he gained from drinking. Was Miles’s answer really that important to him?
Miles blurted, perhaps too quickly, “What if I said yes?” then immediately ducked his head.
Oh god what had he just said? To Wright? What had Wright meant when he said that? Maybe Miles had misinterpreted his suggestion? He’d only been over twice and they hadn’t talked in months, was he being too hasty? Maybe, maybe, maybe…
“Oh-ho?” Phoenix smiled. “Good, then.” Miles sighed. Maybe he was too drunk to recognize the shift in Miles’s tone. “Me, too.”
It happened slowly, then all at once. Phoenix and Miles were sitting inches away from each other, tucked in a blackout with the rain falling as background noise, each a few drinks in as Phoenix’s hand found Miles’s in the dark. It was rough and warm, as Miles had suspended it’d be, and calloused from his piano playing at the Borscht Bowl Club. Miles’s mind immediately went fuzzy, from both the touch and the alcohol, so he could barely speak as Phoenix leaned in to him, closing the minuscule gap between them.
“It was never about the bills,” Phoenix whispered, familiar and deep into Miles’s ear. Miles could feel the warmth radiating from his skin, the slight sweat underneath his grey hoodie, his course hands making their way to Miles’s face. He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his mouth as he took in the man before him, the man whose eyes were lidded, desperately wanting, searching for an identical signal in Miles’s. His breath still carried a faint scent of wine and he was exhaling heavily.
Miles felt his heart thud faster and faster in his chest, harder and harder, as Phoenix’s fingers gently cascaded across his jawline and then found placement so that he could gently rub a thumb against the skin of Miles’s cheek. It felt rough and warm and so correct Miles could melt. “No,” Miles breathed, “it wasn’t.”
Phoenix chuckled, a warm, deep sound with a growl to it and an underlying tone of weariness. “I like you, Miles. Really, really do. I always have , and I always will. And I understand if, if you don’t but god am I so tired and-“ he tried to pull back but Miles clasped his hand and brought it back to its position.
“I…I feel the same way about you too,” Miles breathed. He cleared his throat, shocked at himself that he had even said the words, that he’d been able to get them across.
“Glad to see we’re on the same page, then,” Phoenix murmured, his eyes flicking down to Miles’s lips.
“Wouldn’t it be more accurate to say I’m three steps ahead o-“ Miles whispered teasingly, but he was interrupted by Phoenix’s lips pressing against his.
The first thing Miles noticed in his hazy state was that Phoenix kissed like a man starved, hungry for any taste he could garner from Miles’s mouth. It was honestly quite attractive and Miles sighed into it until he was panting for breath and flushed, feeling more warm than he had snuggling up close to a radiator on a freezing winter’s day. When he first pulled back he had barely a moment to inhale again before Phoenix lunged in again for another, and another, the passion from him never fading, never wearing out no matter how many times he came back for more.
And Miles enjoyed all of it. He wasn’t very experienced, aside from a few casual dates ending in small touches, and he certainly had never felt anything like the burning need that scorched through him before.
Soon, Phoenix’s fingers found their way to Miles’s shirt and he fumbled to keep his breathing steady, to not make too much noise in order to not wake Trucy.
“Hey, shouldn’t we save this for another time?” Miles asked, flustered. “I don’t think you’re in the right headspace, and it’s a bit…crowded.”
Phoenix sighed. “If you insist,” he said as he traced his fingertips down Miles’s abdomen. “But you promise me we can save it for later?”
“Promise,” Miles smiled, his heart racing fast, aglow in the soul lightening way of new love.
The storm quieted. A few moments later, Miles’s eyelids grew heavy and he sank into the thick blankets and warm cushions and passed out on Phoenix’s shoulder. Trucy rolled around in her sleep, flinging her arm across Phoenix’s lap and trapping him between the two people he loved most in the world. After a while that seemed not long at all, sleep dawned on him as well and he at last began to snore, his back slouched against the wall in a posture that would do him no favors the following morning, and his two arms slung around his daughter and his partner. The weight of their bodies pressed against him was comfortable despite the sharp elbows and chins, and he succumbed to deep slumber until dawn.