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Ashur looked up to see Tarquin approaching him cautiously. The man had a small envelope in his hand, carefully pressed between his fingers as if he feared any harm befalling it. Missives poured in every hour, yet the Viper sensed there was something special about this one. A reverence as his best friend presented the vellum to him with a grim nod.
“Neve found this and sent it over,” he began as he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, as if he were unsure how to speak his next words. Ashur’s hand trembled slightly as he took the note. The only mark upon it his name written in a familiar script that made his heart pound.
“It's from her,” Tarquin all but whispered. But it might as well have been a scream as Ashur’s sole focus narrowed to the letter from Rook. From his love. From the one currently trapped in some hell designed by Solas. An elf who currently worked in the next room tending the wounded of Minrathous. A man he was forced to cooperate with, for the good of their people.
“Leave me.” The order wasn't really needed. His second in command already moving before the words left his lips. He needed to be alone. To process. To grieve.
He pressed the letter to his mask and kissed it affectionately. He had hoped to find some trace of the caramel scent of her skin there, but sadly there was naught but smell of the stale ink.
“Amatus,” he chanted as he closed his eyes. Flashing back to their last time together. That night he had stayed at the Lighthouse with her. His first time, and last. Before she left for Tearstone. Holding onto those precious moments between them. Two lovers fighting fate.
“You know Dragons mate for life…”
She had blushed when she told him that. And as he faced the reality of a world without her, he knew it to be true. There would never be another, save her.
He slid the note open, his eyes scanning her words as he soaked them in. Wishing for the hundredth time that day alone that she was here with him.
Hey boss,
Well if you're reading this then I let you down. Boss’ orders right? Yeah guess I really messed that one up.
Not like I intentionally got myself killed. Probably anyway. But you know me. Never a very good soldier. Or shadow dragon. Never good at taking orders anyway. I can only imagine the amount of headaches I caused you over the years. Not like you ever really held much against me. Probably should have been way harder on me honestly. I didn't deserve how good you were to me after some of the shit I pulled. Especially how amazing these last few months have been. When I tell you they have been the best of my life…
Kaffas! I really wanted to keep this strictly business. Should hurt less that way right? But my brain and my heart can't agree. Probably because I love you. I think I have for years. And what's worse is I know you love me. Even though that's a truly stupid thing for you to do. And not just because you're the boss. There's too many complications to us. To the other person you are. And yet, I would have followed you anywhere. Been anything you needed. Whether I remained your hidden blade in the dark, or something more.
But none of that matters now. I'm gone and you're not. I know what I said, but you have to move on. Find someone else. Not Tarquin though. For the Love of the Maker anyone but Tarquin.
Be happy though, for me. And know if there is another life after this one, I will find you there. I would find you anywhere.
With everything I have, I am yours
There was not enough air in the room as he finished her letter. He pulled his hat down low, wanting to hide his tears from anyone who might have chanced to walk by and see him. He didn't know when she found the time to write this. To hide its existence from him. But he was grateful for it. He needed this message from her like he needed his next heartbeat. Her words keeping him going when all hope felt lost.
He stood as he folded the note and slid it in his jacket pocket. A grin lighting his face despite the pain aching from his chest.
He would get her back. He would tell her that he was the lucky one. That he didn't deserve her. That she was the best soldier. The best Shadow Dragon. That he wanted her with him always.
And breathe life into the words never spoken to her before. That he loved her. Loved his little Rook and only her.