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It had been only one week.
A week since she was rescued by a gorgeous woman with golden hair and an attitude like a trucker and a smile that could move mountains. A week since she heard her say "I would never leave a pretty girl like you behind" and held out her hand to help Alicia out of the car wreck she had been hiding in when the walkers surprised her and the others while raiding out shops in a small village near the Interstate.
A week since Elyza Lex came into her life.
It has been 6 and a half days since the Australian started high key flirting with her, throwing off the teenager completely.
6 and a half days since she had to realize that the way the blonde survivor looked at her made her fingers sweat and her heart beat faster.
6 and a half days in which she was both amused and annoyed that Elyza never seemed to run out of cheesy pick up lines and never failed an opportunity to hit on her. She got so flustered all the time - she wanted her to stop making her embarrass herself, but at the same time she couldn't help acknowledging the feeling spreading in her body every time. Her mind that was usually pretty good with instant comebacks was betraying her too. Useless brain.
4 days since she decided that she had to stay focused on getting through this, on not letting whatever Elyza was doing affect her that much - because they had really bigger problems than someone playing with her head like that.
Since she started ignoring the comments and put in her headphones whenever she needed to occupy herself from her own thoughts and the world around her.
2 days since she started feeling guilty because a part of her was desperately missing the warmth in her stomach and the intensity of those blue eyes on her skin and the bad pick up lines making an awful situation look a bit brighter.
Six hours since they left their hiding space in an abandoned factory hall to move on, to part the group depending on their individual missions and to meet again when they had found everything they needed right now. Within a few months their former materialistic self-absorbed needs had transformed into things they used to give not a single thought to. Back when they had homes, income, a steady market and luxuries. Now her mission was nearly always the same: Find a place to stay for a few nights to get some sleep and time to recharge. Look for pans and other utensils to cook since the last ones they found in an old cellar were rusty and damaged. Find food and fresh water. The two things everything came always down to. And finally, some tools because their next goal would be to get mobile again.
Maybe it hadn’t been all bad that the constant flirting and joking nature of Elyza gave her a break from how plain her daily life had become. But then again, this was not all a big joke. This was their life now.
Alicia had wanted to get away for years. Away from her family. From high school. From always worrying about Nick and from coming home to an empty house without a message because her mum didn’t need to tell her anymore that she was out to find and talk to her brother. She had wanted to leave it all behind, be her own independent person instead of an angsty teenager, which she was aware she was.
And she got that. Partly. Away from the life in the suburbs. It just didn’t play out like it was supposed to. And in the beginning, she held onto her plans. Probably for much longer than she should have. Now that she slowly lost hope in a future where everything could go back to a semi normal semi functional society, she also slowly stopped trying to act as if she was alright and positive all the time.
Although it had been a bit more bearable in the last few days. Six and a half days.
It was three hours since she found herself in the company of the blonde Australian moving through the slim corridors of a small convenience store backside. The shop itself had been empty, but they were moving through the halls of the 'staff' area to find the storage room.
Three hours since she had to find out just how persistent Elyza was, because she still continued to be the way she was all week and Alicia started to get really pissed off about it, throwing a "Fine. Will you make yourself useful now? I just want to get the damn pans in this damn house and get out of here" as an only answer to her flirting.
Elyza groaned loudly. Suddenly Alicia felt herself being grabbed by the shoulders and turned around while her back pushed roughly against the wall of the only half lightened corridor.
Her body had just become used to react fast in threatening situations, to let her knife or whatever weapon they had in that moment come up and push on instinct. But this was too fast for her to grasp. Alicias knife fell to the floor, her pistol remained untouched in her belt.
Fuck, Eliza was fast. And strong. Her grip was firm, but didn’t hurt her at all, which was another surprising revelation in her frozen staring state.
"God, you are so frustrating!" the blonde burst out and sounded both angry and exhausted.
Alicia took a moment to come clear with her situation, before she could manage to give back: "This is not a game! And I don't care what you think about me."
"I think you do. I am not blind, you know? And you are not as subtle as you might think."
"Fuck off!" she spit harshly to the taller one but remained in the same position. Elyza didn't hold on to her, she let Alicia all the freedom to push her away. But even with her face merely inches away from the heated gaze of the other, she wasn't trying to back off.
"Maybe I will when you tell me why you can't admit you're attracted to me!"
Alicia had opened up her mouth, ready to shout back at whatever the girl would have to say, but suddenly it was like all anger was blown out of her. She gasped, nearly chocked, her eyes wide open while staring at the other. She had no words.
“I- I don’t-“, she gasped breathless, just trying to give anything back.
A spark of recognition showed in the deep blue seas she couldn't even ignore in the half dark of the corridor. Something that hinted that they saw something that wasn't new to them. Something they had felt once, maybe a few times, in a long overcome past.
Her voice grew very gentle when she said:
"You know, the world has bigger problems right now than a girl who likes to kiss other girls."
She let the younger girl her time. No one said anything. But she didn't move away. She made sure that the way she was leaning onto her at the wall wasn't hurting the brunette, but she didn't let their eye contact break for even a second. She saw how rapid the younger girls breathing had become. She felt like she needed the contact in this moment, even if she might decide that Elyza was wrong any minute and would possible slap her or push her away and only fill her gaze with despise in the coming future.
For Alicia it was like the air around them was electric. She felt a rush in her ears that told her she was blushing furiously again at the words. Her whole body was shivering, but she didn't care. She wanted to close her eyes, to hide before the intensity of it all, but a little smug voice in her head didn’t want her to show weakness in her weakest moment yet.
"Because that is what you want, isn't it?" the voice of the blonde had lost all anger, all annoyance. She was still gentle, but it was more hoarse, dark, dangerous than anything she had heard before. "Or is it just me?"
She swallowed hard.
“Because I do. I do want that... so much” she added, just loud enough to be heard in the dead silent vacuum of their moment.
Alicias eyes left the clouded ones in front of her at the words and moved slowly down to the full lips of the other girl. So close to her. So tempting.
And then she moved. Moved to those lips.
She would like to say that Elyza grabbed her and kissed her. And that it was all there was to the scene. Or that she realized what she wanted to do since "I would never leave a pretty girl like you behind" but fact is, she didn't even know. She didn’t know anything anymore, right then. Not about herself. Not why Elyza forced such a reaction out of her. Not why she felt like she could breathe again for the first time in months. They kissed.
Their lips met and Alicia sank into the feeling of their touch. Into the person she didn't even really know and who still felt like they had been to the stars and back together. Into the person that drove her insane in more than one way. Into the feeling of coming home, of being exactly where she was supposed to be. Into the taste and the sound of her own heartbeat echoing in her whole body and into everything she could take while her fingers held on tight on the smooth leather of Elyzas jacket.
It was three hours since her whole world stopped for a few minutes only to come crushing down on her in high speed afterwards, changed.
And now, now she didn't know what to think anymore. And much less how not to think about the moment they had only three hours before. She actually kissed her on that very same day.
And she shouldn't even get a clear picture of her feelings now. Now that she was finally able to take a break after they found a place to stay the night. Now that the group was back together and she had to act like nothing had changed. Like looking for cooking utensils couldn’t be a life changing mission. She couldn’t take a moment to really think for herself because Ofelia had a say in this, apparently. Not when she made the mistake of sharing in a weak moment and had given the spanish woman a new favorite conversation subject and teasing material with it.
"Did you ever think you would end up getting laid in the zombie apocalypse by a hot Australian?"
She would never live this down.
Alicia didn't answer, just made a disapproving face at her friend.
Ofelia laughed, maybe the first time in days. They were sitting on the ground of a balcony, looking over what might have been a beautiful big garden before the world went to hell. Now the fence was cut open in multiple places, a few rotting bodies were laying at the left side where they moved them to and the railing of the balcony was only existent on the side Ofelia was sitting at. Alicia was sitting on the free edge. A real danger hazard, if anyone would still care about safety measurements at home instead of not ending up as lunch for the undead.
The guys were up front, working on the two cars they found in the neighborhood, trying to get them to run again. Her mother was inside, doing whatever. Planning, probably. Restlessly coming up with one strategy after another. And Elyza, well Elyza was mostly in Alicia's thoughts.
She grabbed the water bottle the other girl was holding and took a sip.
The sun was slowly going down, the garden flooded with orange light. It had been three hours since she had kissed the person she only met a week ago and who was also a girl. And Ofelia couldn't help teasing her about it.
"Oh come on ‘Licia, don't be a grump. I just didn't think you'd swing there before, you know?"
Alicia sighed. "Well I didn't either okay? Wish I didn't tell you about it anyways"
"But you couldn't help yourself when confronted with the hurricane of self-confidence and dangerous attractiveness that is Elyza Lex?" she chuckled. "I mean I can't blame you, but please, tell me again how her eyes are the most beautiful shade of blue you have ever seen!" she said dramatically and earned a groan and the empty bottle flying in her direction.
"Aren't you a bit too old to act so childish now?"
"Yeah but that doesn't mean I can't be amused about the GIANT crush of yours"
"Oh shut up" she shushed her and looked around to make sure no one was listening in.
They sat there in silence for a moment, listening to the noises from inside and the occasional groan of the undead close by.
Blonde hair appeared in their view when Elyza stepped out from under the balcony, where a broken glass door led to the living room of their home for the night. A heavy looking axe was leaning on her shoulder, her shining hair in contrast to her dark clothes and her effortless badass attitude.
She looked up and winked to the girls. For a moment Alicia froze, blushing furiously at the question in her head how much of that her- how much the strange and intimidating yet endearing girl had heard of their conversation. She knew something like that would happen because that was just how her life worked.
She didn't dare to look back at Ofelia, her eyes glued to the backside of the body moving across the lawn to a lonely excuse of a wooden doghouse that was long uninhabited.
Just like with all the casual and then also the soon following not-so-casual pick up lines and the blunt glances from the older girl, Alicia now felt a similar unashamed intentionality when she observed the way Elyza moved, slipped off her black leather jacket, draped it over the garden fence and grabbed the axe with both of her hands.
Alicia could still feel the tenderness of the leather in her hands, on her skin.
With powerful swings and skillful aim Elyza worked on turning the little building into a pile of wood to make a fire with. Without the jacket she only wore a tank top to the tight pants and the combat boots. And the way the close fitting top showed off her muscled arms and hugged her hip made Alicia's mouth go dry.
No way wasn't she doing that to get to her. Just like with all the flirting. And what did they put into the water in Australia to let someone be so hot? How dare them.
But maybe Elyza had been right. Something that had been spinning around in her head in between the mess that were her feelings and insecurities and intense memories of the kiss. Maybe the world had bigger problems than a girl kissing a girl and then wanting to do it again. And again. And again.
Again.