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it ached, at first. as if his skin had been stretched, in each and every possible way. his eyes blink back to life, nearly blinded by the gentle glow of the sun. he feels the need to raise his sore hand, to hide the light away. the rays seem to seep through his pale skin, mapping all the veins beneath. the warmth felt strange.
he sits up straight, and takes a deep breath, the air around him tasting stale. he looks around, and it feels like it’s the first time since forever that something feels familiar. papers scattered across the floor, with formulas hastily scribbled on them. a chalkboard covered in diagrams and sketches, all blending into one another. a sweet chaos that feels like home.
and home means–
“viktor!”
jayce.
barely awake, and already rushing to help viktor up. his hands wrap tightly around the other’s, but he forgets to even pull at him. instead, jayce kneels down, staring at his partner with awe, joy, and disbelief. “you’re alive”, he whispers, his voice such a soft sigh it’s barely audible. “you’re here.” he sounds like a man who just saw his god.
for a few seconds, they stay like this. hazel eyes plunged into hazel eyes, struggling to realize what happened. jayce’s fingers slowly intertwine with viktor’s, who smiles a little, carving a little dimple in his left cheek. “were your hands always this warm?” he asks, lowering his gaze. “probably, yeah.”
“i must have forgotten.”
a quiet laugh escapes jayce, and he reassures him that it’s okay. that he can get used to warmth again now. his thumb begins to stroke his partner’s scrawny hand in a soothing, affectionate gesture. he wishes it could become a habit. “you know, now that i think about it,” viktor starts, grinning, “i don’t think i’ve ever seen your lab with all four walls.”
“it looks better like this, doesn’t it?” jayce chuckles, but soon freezes up, a blush creeping up on his cheeks. the soft smell of coffee lingers on the back of his hand, as a fading reminder of the kiss that his partner just planted there. “what was that?” his voice is quiet, maybe a little pitchy.
“a little celebration, for seeing you in the flesh again.” viktor’s voice dies out when jayce’s lips meet his. he kisses desperately, closing his eyes and forgetting to breathe, forgetting all but the warmth of his partner’s skin. his hand rips itself away from viktor’s, to settle on the side of his head instead, and feel the softness of his hair cover his fingers. their lips part for a few seconds, and they look at each other again.
“don’t you think i want to celebrate, too?” jayce breathes out, the taste of overly sweet coffee filling his mouth. he’s staring at viktor, etching his face in his memory, as if they were going to disappear again. “don’t you think i dreamed of doing that? don’t you think it hurts that it took our death for me to find the courage to kiss you?” his voice wavers slightly.
after that, there is silence. a soft kind of it, carried by the unheard echo of jayce's words. “you think we died? i've never felt as alive as when you held me”, viktor utters to himself, his eyes roaming over his partner's face. “it was a strange moment, but i swear to you, if that was death— then i want to die every day.”
jayce's eyes grow soft, and his hand falls into viktor's lap, his fingers slowly curling up on themselves. viktor looks around, a small laugh leaving him. “i didn’t think afterlife would be so messy, though…”
“oh, shut up. it's a lab, of course it's going to be a mess”, he quips, a light, mocking frown on his brow. his hand clasps viktor's again, this time pulling him up — he nearly falls into jayce, stumbling down into his chest. “couldn't you be a little gentler?” viktor mumbles, taking a few painful, dizzy steps behind.
his partner catches him, holding his arms with panic in his grip, as if viktor were going to stumble back, fall and become scattered pieces of broken glass. jayce's eyes sweep the floor, trying to find something in the mess of his lab. “where's your crutch?” he eventually mutters, defeated.
“i can stand on my own, you know.”
“yes, but not for long”, jayce argues, before setting his partner on a laboratory bench. by miracle, there’s almost nothing on it, except chalk and torn pages. viktor takes one of them in his hand, reading the notes jayce wrote.
“stay here, sit tight, i'll look for it”, says jayce as he starts to check every corner of the room, moving things here and there.
“so much for a stupid crutch”, the other scoffs to himself. “i could just stay standing.”
jayce doesn’t hear that, and viktor supposes he can be happy about it. his eyes focus on the piece of paper in his hand, quickly getting used to the hasty, tortuous writing. these notes were a mere part of the hextech project, from back when it was still the crazed obsession of a young jayce talis. seeing his signature at the bottom of the page brought a smile to viktor’s lips.
he can also hear a few curses, every now and then, as jayce’s patience wears thinner and thinner. it didn’t matter where or how many times he looked, viktor’s crutch simply wasn’t there. “perhaps, in the setting we are in, i just don’t have that crutch?” viktor ends up suggesting, his voice tentative, as he glances at jayce.
“then i'll make you another one.” his voice is firm as he says this, as if he were making a promise. “the exact same as before, okay?”
viktor smiles, almost chuckling at jayce’s eagerness, before nodding in acknowledgment. he turns towards the window, his eyes getting lost in the sight of piltover unfolding and unfurling before him, as if he were witness to a painting’s creation. looking at the cityscape feels like discovering it again. “jayce, there’s something i’ve noticed,” viktor starts, his voice hesitant. “this ache i had in my lungs before, it has disappeared.”
jayce fails to answer, so he settles on staring at his partner, his eyes a little wide. “really?” it’s like he doesn’t dare to whisper it too loud, like it’s a hope too foolish to share. his steps feel unsure, as he walks up to viktor. the moment he’s close enough, he hugs him from behind, the embrace feeling gently surreal. jayce rests his head on viktor’s shoulder, letting a little sigh out after he breathed his clothes in.
“so that means, your disease…”
“yeah, i hope”, viktor smiles, his head leaning into jayce’s.
“you feel cold”, the latter notices, before he plants a soft kiss on his partner’s cheek. “can we stay like this for a while? i can go grab a blanket for you after, don’t worry.”
“i wasn’t worrying.”