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Valerie never enjoyed her long hair. It was itchy and thick and took a ridiculous amount of maintenance. The only reason she didn't cut the nuisance was because of how much it meant to her dad. He always said she looked alot like her mother. Long hair, freckles, blue eyes. She had never met her though. But that's why she was translating this journal. Or she would be if it wasn't for the stupid hair that kept falling on her face suffocating her. She groaned loudly aggressively, tucking more dark hair behind her ears. That's better- hair. Ok this is ridiculous. Maybe she brought some hair ties with her?
Valerie pushed her chair out from her desk and jumped up to begin searching through her bags for anything that could-
“Aw, does the barn animal need my help again?” Hugo asked, making his voice sound as pitiful as possible from the tent door.
Valerie paused to blow a strand of hair from her face. “No Hugo. I don't need your help.” She grumbled without turning “I just need to find a fucking hair tie.” She mumbled the last part to herself as she began digging again.
There was quiet for a moment and Valerie hoped that Hugo had left but she knew she was wrong.
“I could always cut your hair for you,” Hugo said less annoyingly “if it's really bothering you that much.”
Wait, was he being serious? Valerie turned around to face Hugo and he seemed genuine. It would be nice to get it out of the way.. No, it would break her dad's heart.
“Frankly, I wouldn't trust you with a pair of safety scissors.” she huffed.
He sighed and shrugged, “Alright, suit yourself.” and left as Valerie continued searching through bags.
—
It had been how many hours? And Valerie had searched through every single bag she brought. Not a single hair tie or even, God's forbid, string. Ugh. Valerie hated this. Hated having to go crawling to Hugo.
She stood outside his tent. Was she really going to do this? Let Hugo cut her hair? Dad would be so- Another strand of hair slapped her face and got stuck in her mouth. Fuck it.
“Hugo” she called, careful not to wake the others.
No answer.
“Hugo.” She called again a little louder.
Still no answer. This bitch.
“Hugo!” She said again strongly.
This time she heard rustling from inside the tent. A familiar head of blond hair poked out through the tent door.
“Jesus what?” He grumbled.
“Cut it.” She said firmly not breaking eye contact.
“Wha?” Hugo mumbled.
“I need you to cut-” she cut herself off as another strand of hair slapped her face and took a deep breath to try and calm herself down. “I need you to cut my hair.” He looked at her in a way she couldn't understand.
“V it's late” he sighed.
“Please?” She tried with her best puppy dog eyes.
…
“Alright. Come on.” Hugo gestured for her to follow and she grinned widely, practically vibrating on the spot.
—
Hugo pulled out the wooden chair from his desk. “Take a seat” he said, wondering over to grab his hair supplies.
Valerie sat crisscrossed on the chair bouncing with excitement. Hugo snorted as he walked over with some scissors, a comb, towel and an assortment of other things.
“I'm gonna need you to sit still freckles.”
“Oh, right.” She grinned sheepishly, putting her feet on the floor just barely containing her excitement.
Hugo wrapped the towel around her letting the hair sit on top.
“So how short are you thinking?” He asked.
“Oh uhh I guess I didn't really think about it..” Val hummed “if I'm being honest I don't really care just get out of my face.”
Hugo chuckled “fair enough” he grabbed a brush and looked at the hair with a hand on his hip. “How about we start shoulder length? then we can go shorter if you want.”
“Okay.” Valerie nodded, taking in a breath.
“Gods, do you ever brush your hair?” Hugo winced.
“Hey!”
“I'm the one who has to deal with it!”
—
A little while later and Hugo was done he grabbed a mirror and handed it to Valerie.
“So what do you think?” He asked quietly.
Valerie hummed then paused for a moment. “You said you could make it shorter right?” she muttered.
“Yep. How short?” He watched as she played with the hair a little.
“I don't know just.. shorter?” it came out more like a question but Hugo got back to work.
The hair was now neck length. Hugo handed the mirror back and watched Valerie's expression. It still wasn't very happy. She hummed but not a pleased hum.
“Do you.. not like it?” He asked carefully.
“No. No! It looks amazing!”
“But there's something wrong.. isn't there?”
She huffed leaning back in the chair.
“I don't know.” She mumbled “I guess I just..” she shrugged “it doesn't matter. It's better this way.”
“Well I think it matters.” Hugo said leaning against his desk. “Need to make sure my customers won't sue me.”
Valerie snorted before sighing. “I guess I just hoped..” her voice got quieter “that maybe if I got rid of it I would be happier.. it's not that I don't like the haircut or anything! Sometimes I just- God's this is gonna sound stupid.” She mumbled, hitting her head against the chair. She peaked through the gaps in her hands and Hugo raised an eyebrow waiting for her to continue.
“Do you ever just- when you see yourself.. I-in a mirror or painting it just.. doesn't feel like you? Like it's your body but not really?” She waited carefully for his response.
…
“Like you're trapped in a body that isn't yours?” Hugo asked with a gentle look on his face. Valerie looked up slowly and nodded. “Yeah- yeah. I-I get that.”
“Does it- can you make it go away? Or does it just stay there?”
“Well.. I usually try to lean into it..” Valerie tilted her head questioning for him to continue. “It's probably different for you.. but for me when I feel like a girl I present as a girl when I feel like a guy I present as a boy.” He realized something in that moment. In the entirety of the time he's been with these guys he hasn't cross dressed in front of them (what a waist of dresses).
Val hummed. “You- you can do that?” Hugo nodded with a soft smile. “And that- that helps?”
“I find it does” he said with a shrug. “I think a lot of people do.”
“Huh. But how do you- how do you know what's right?” She asked, hugging her knees.
“I- I don't know. I guess just.. try different things until you can look in the mirror and be happy- or happier.” she hummed again.
…
“Do you.. do you want me to try and make it less.. feminine?” Her big blue eyes looked up. “Your hair.” Valerie nodded and Hugo walked over to get back to work.
—
A little bit later Hugo handed Valerie the mirror again. This time when she saw her reflection a soft smile tugged at her lips as she played with her hair. But then she paused and looked again as her smile dropped.
“Fuck.” She mumbled, pulling a hand down her face.
“What? Why fuck?” Hugo asked, a little worried.
She let out a sad chuckle bringing her knees up to her chest. “Dad's gonna kill me. Or at least throw me out.”
“Why would he do that?” Hugo asked softly.
Valerie rested her head on her knees and offered a small smile as tears pricked at her eyes.
“At this point he only keeps me around because I remind him of mum.. and if I don't look like her.. then what's the point? I'm nothing but a nuisance anyways.”
“What makes you think that?” Hugo asked again gently.
The constant death threats to their house, the numerous explosions she's caused, the mess, the list goes on really.
Val sighed and he looked at her sympathetically. “For what it's worth.. i'd keep you around.”
She snorted, “why? So you can make me do your dirty work?” she asked with a smirk.
“Nah. You'd be terrible.” He grinned. She chuckled slightly, “But you are pretty entertaining.” The two sat in a comfortable silence.
“Hey Hugh,”
“Hmm?”
“Thank you. For..” every thing. She cleared her throat. “Sorry for keeping you up.”
“Eh it's fine” he shrugged “I probably wouldn't have slept much anyways.” His eyes moved down to the floor now covered in thick dark hair and they both winced.
“Sorry for that too-”