Chapter Text
This was it. Johnny was dead. Dallas was dead.
Ponyboy was almost dead, innocence stripped from him in a week. All that kept “Ponyboy” alive was his beating heart.
He was miserable, with two of his best friends robbed from him he had nothing left to live for. Why did he have to survive? What did he do to deserve being alive?
Maybe God would be mad at him for doing what he was about to do. But then again, God didn’t do anything when Johnny needed it. Was He even real? It didn’t matter. Nothing would matter once he took the mix of aspirin and benadryl in front of him.
Pony picked up the pink and white pills and lifted them to his mouth before swallowing them dry.
Water. He needed water. But he couldn’t go to the kitchen because he already had red gashes in his wrists from where he tried to empty his wrists into the sink and failed because he was scared.
“God I’m such a wimp… I just want to see Johnny again…” He winced as he looked at the fat layer he had cut to before dropping the razor.
All that he had was an empty beer can and the bathroom faucet. While he filled the can with water to drink and the pills in his throat settled, his wrists continued to bleed out. Hopefully Two-bit wont need to use the bathroom for a while.
“Fuck-“ Ponyboy groaned as he grabbed his throat that was blocked by the pills and chugged the water. That was better. He sighed as the pills went down.
He had written a note to Darry, Soda, and Two-bit.
The note read as follows:
“If you are reading this, I’m dead. I love you two, I love all of you actually. But I can’t take this. It’s been a week since their deaths and I want to see them again. If I go to hell at least you two will be free of an extra mouth to feed. If I go to heaven, I’ll say hello to Johnny and Dally for you all.”
-Ponyboy
The grammar was good enough, the paper had blood stains on it, and the handwriting was shaky. It was what you would expect a suicide note to look like.
Pony started to get dizzy from either the blood loss or the pills. He sat on the floor against the door, and started crying.
He mourned his innocence, his friends. He would be able to see them again right? Lord he wanted a cigarette.
“I’m sorry…” Ponyboy muttered as his vision started to go away.
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“Ponyboy? You’ve been in there for a while-“ Two started to shout across the house as he realized that the kid had been in the bathroom for way too long. When he got up to go knock on the bathroom door, he saw blood running from under the door.
“Hey kid!?” He shouted as he ran to the door and started to try to get in. It was locked. Oh no. He promised Darry that he would watch Ponyboy while him and Soda were at work, and now this?
By the time Two-bit was able to unlock the door by bashing the lock off, it was too late.
Ponyboy lay on the floor covered in blood and vomit, while foaming at the mouth. If he had a pulse, it would probably not last long enough to get him to the hospital.
“What the hell Pony?!” He screamed as he looked around the room and saw the empty pill bottles, one of benadryl and one of aspirin. Ponyboy wanted to kill himself. Then he saw the gashes on the kid’s arms that were leaking blood.
He almost threw up when he tried to pick up the kid to bring him to his car. To take him to the hospital.
“Please don’t die on me Pony…” He wanted to cry. Then he saw the note that was written that was on the counter top. After a quick read, Two felt a tear run down his cheek.
Then he saw that Steve was walking by.
“Hey Steve! Get over here!” He shouted as he set Ponyboy in the car and hopped into the drivers seat. “Call Darry and let him know that there’s been an emergency, and tell him to get to the hospital!”
Steve looked confused, but saw Pony and his eyes widened and ran into the house to the phone.
All that was going through Two’s head was “Not a third one… please don’t die…”
It might have been out loud because Pony groaned and woke up for a second to say something.
“I- I’m so-sorry Two-bit.” He stuttered before he blacked out again.