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He was a bomb, quite literally.
Explosive, impulsive, rageful, irritated easily, arrogant, loud.. all of those traits led back to his contract; the bomb devil.
And Ochako was just a meteor, maybe not the exact same thing, but similar. It explodes, it impacts the area around her. It would be clear if she had disappeared, it would've left a huge hole for everyone.
The day they met was hell.
"Katsuki," Keigo says, sorting through a few documents. "I've been thinking of making changes. Changes that might irritate you."
"Don't care."
"I want Izuku to have a new buddy."
"Huh!? You're replacing me, bastard!?"
"I could never." Keigo smiles. That smile feels so empty that Katsuki immediately shuts up. Keigo's lips might move up, but his eyes remain like two mesmerizing globes that stood like ice. "Izuku will be working with Kirishima from now on. Izuku has a lot of catching up to do. You will get a new buddy."
"No way!"
"Katsuki."
Silence.
"Whatever. I don't care about that defenseless Izuku anyway."
In that twitching eye, all of his emotions stayed locked away. Despair, longing, that soon got blasted away by his usual arrogance.
"Who will it be anyway?"
"A new devil hunter. Brought in perfectly by Izuku." Keigo laughs, hiding some files in the cabinets. "Uraraka, I heard."
"Uraraka? What kind of nobody are they?"
"You'll see." Keigo shoots a mysterious glance. "She's just like you. Special."
"Huh—"
Ochako Uraraka.
She knocks softly on the door, her nervous fists lingering on the hard wood until she hears the utter that welcomes her into the office. She opens the door and stands in the doorway for a moment, too anxious to enter the threshold.
"Nobody!" Katsuki shouts, his hand going to the back of his head to grasp at the dynamite braid. "Fight me to show me your damn power, you nobody!"
"Huuuuuh?" Ochako looks at him, nose scrunched in disgust at the pretentious words. "I'm not a nobody! I'm Ochako Uraraka, and I want to make the world a better place!!"
"In your damn dreams!!"
Katsuki did not look back on that meeting with happiness. Standing in the kitchen, calmly cooking dinner for both him and Izuku (as they had been buddies just a day before), Katsuki thought about it more. He gripped the knife with unnecessary force, the blade loudly thumping against the wooden cutting board.
Suddenly, knocks filled the air. Katsuki didn’t move from his place. Izuku went to check the door.
"You two have a really nice apartment.." Ochako shyly entered after Izuku held the door for her. "I’m supposed to live with you two."
"What the hell!" Katsuki yelled, rudely pointing at her. "I need no hag in my space! Get her out, Deku!!"
"Hag!?" Ochako huffed, clenching her fingers in fists. "You're going too far, buddy!!"
"You’re not a damn buddy to me," Katsuki hissed out, glaring at Ochako. He clenched the knife hard in his hands. "You could never be, loser."
"Kacchan!"
"Hmph! Whether you like it or not doesn’t matter. I have to live with you two."
"Live on the streets for all I care." Katsuki pointed the knife at her. "Country rat."
"Katsuki!" Izuku stands between them, his serious face far more terrifying than death itself. "Quit it, now. Ochako's living with us. I talked with Keigo already."
"There's no room for her!"
"Then I'll sleep on the floor." Izuku exclaims, staring at Katsuki as if staring at a boring wall. "Ochako will take my bed."
Katsuki could not believe this. He looked at her as if she were a snake, invading his peaceful place of living with malice as her main goal. A viper like face, that's what her face was. Chubby, chubby like those poor hags in the villages. Katsuki glanced away, unable to swallow the view.
"No way." Katsuki shaked his head. "The next thing we know you'll die for her."
"Who knows? Maybe I will."
"Please! Quit fighting!"
There was another memory. And then another, and then one more. Each contained her; the vile viper taking apart his life with its fangs and rearranging it to its liking. But a beautiful life blossomed from that new plan. The guilt rips him inside out, those rude words could never be taken back.
Little sister, maybe.
"I don't want to think anymore." Katsuki exclaims one day.
He is face to face with Keigo. He was a person Katsuki looked up to, simply because Best Jeanist held him with respect. Keigo, the man who got Katsuki to get rid of the Gun Devil.
Izuku Midoriya.
Vomit threatens to come up to Katsuki's mouth, and Katsuki sits down, head pounding and heart thumping against his ribcage. What could have he done? Izuku; his Deku.
"I can't bring him back." Keigo replies, smoothly sitting down next to Katsuki. "But I can erase that pain. Just do what I say, Dynamight."
Dynamight, the bomb devil. A fabulous nickname.
"Nothing you could do would ever help me."
"Don't be so pessimistic. I’m the leader of your division for a reason."
"Fine." Katsuki spits out. "Destroy my fuckin' brain or somethin'. Anything would be better than this."
"Glad to hear."
"Please."
Izuku Midoriya, that's the kanji carved out in Katsuki's mind. The kanji that ought to be seen with respect and joy, not with fear and disgust. That kanji should've been on a grave, not within useless statistics, numbers.
Katsuki is sitting on the couch in Keigo's apartment. Keigo is a good man, Katsuki guesses so at least. He's a refined gentleman, always arriving at work on time, always granting that empty smile that somehow, after time, did lessen every feeling within Katsuki. Almost as if he made everything else silent. Keigo always had a knowing look in those eyes, predicting most situations.
"Did you know." Katsuki asks.
"Know what?”
"About him."
Keigo takes a sip of his coffee. "Maybe."
"Fucking bastard."
Fighting back no longer has a point. Back then, Katsuki wanted to fight for him; Izuku. For a multitude of reasons, ranging from being childhood friends to wanting Izuku lead a normal life.
In the end, there's just blood on his hands.
There is one more person…
He can’t lose her, for Izuku at least.
"Katsuki." Keigo stands up. "Someone rang the doorbell. Let's open the door."
Keigo leads the exhausted Katsuki to the door. He stands beside, gesturing for Katsuki to open the wooden door, hiding behind it a surprise. Katsuki takes a step close and his hand looms over the doorhandle.
"Don't open it."
Katsuki jolts awake at the sound of Izuku’s voice. He stares at the door. It seems vaguely close to the door within his mind. It's neat, tidy. The doorhandle is a pretty golden. There are no scratch marks on the door. It is well-kept.
"Open it, Katsuki." Keigo says. "Don't keep the guest waiting.."
Katsuki mindlessly follows. He doesn't need to think, not now. He doesn't want to think for just now. For now. Yes, for now. Then, he'll return to saving people.
Just like Izuku wanted.
He opens it.
Ochako stands there, nervous. She holds a birthday cake in her hands. It's a beautiful white cake, vanilla flavoured probably. Katsuki blinks once, and she is gone. Her head hits the ground with a loud thud. Katsuki slowly tilts his head towards Keigo, who had pointed at Ochako.
"Just keeping off the rats from the property."
Katsuki wanted to fight. But how could you fight when everything has been ripped from you? What would you even fight for? Yourself? What a joke.
"Rats.."
He doesn't even feel it when he's fighting.
He regains his stability only when he finds himself in a trash container. Katsuki breathes in and out, his eyes widening softly. He smiles as Ochako nuzzles against him, like a cat. Katsuki doesn't put up a front anymore. It doesn't matter. He’ll die sooner or later.
"You ought to kill him." Ochako says. "This is the last time I'll remember you. This isn't my real body, but it is my soul speaking to you."
"Ochako.."
"What is it?"
"I can't. Izuku is gone. You're gone."
"Are you that heartbroken that you can't do anything!?"
"..yeah.."
This is not like Katsuki. But when faced with grief and death of family, will the happiest person still be happy?
"Katsuki." Ochako firmly declares. "Come find me. Befriend the space hybrid again, and make it into Uraraka again. Promise?"
"It won't be the same." He scoffs, colour slowly returning to his pale face. "I'll try to."
"Please do."
'Cuz, you were my first real friend.'