Chapter Text
Sion was a bit unfocused, as he had always been. He always had trouble setting his mind to something and persuading it until the end, but it was just because nothing was entertaining enough to keep him hanging.
When he was a kid he dreaded watching TV, always changing into weird positions every few minutes, trying to stimulate his brain. He always got bored of his toys, and trying not to die of boredom when he tried to play some games in his mind, but that always drained him too, and he wanted something more challenging than his own thoughts.
As he grew older, around fifteen, he knew something was wrong with him. He couldn’t focus for more than ten minutes to study something, even if he tried to understand it rather than just memorizing it, he just couldn’t focus.
He didn’t have any hobbies, or worse, he had a hundred of them: he liked painting, skateboarding, soccer, tennis, basketball, true crime documentaries, reading comics, manga, fiction, it didn’t matter, music, all kinds of genres too. He didn’t have any favorite artist, he didn’t know any songs as he was always jumping from one to the other, not even finishing them. It was overwhelming for others, especially his parents, but it was the only thing that kept him at bay. He didn’t know how to be still, and he had to live with it.
When he was a kid everyone just thought he was very active and curious, but as he grew older, it sometimes became unbearable to be with him, because he was all the time looking for something new. His friends were skeptical of his intentions and his parents didn’t understand him half of the time, but Sion was okay with it because he was a good kid, he was a good person.
He knew it was something that he had to work on, and he needed to solve it, not because of anyone but himself, because it was starting to get into his personal life. It wasn’t that he wasn’t able to pick a favorite ice cream flavor anymore, he had trouble with his memory, always losing stuff and forgetting important events, like exams and soccer practice. He felt stupid every time he interrupted someone because he just had to say something, always having that sense of urgency.
As everyone suspected (everyone being his parents, his best friend Riku, and his brother Daeyoung) he was diagnosed with ADHD.
The first thing he did was receive therapy. He felt so vulnerable in the waiting room, he was just a sixteen-year-old, of course he had prejudices against therapy, but after some sessions, he kind of saw the point. Only kind of.
He also got prescribed some medication, which at first he was way more open to just chugging some pills and getting on with his day than rather being for an hour every couple of weeks just telling some dude about his inability to focus, which led to not being able to study, getting poor sleep, and having his mind full of thoughts he was unable to do simple tasks, such as those ones that sixteen-year-old did… But that was another topic completely.
His therapist, a young man called Jungwoo, talked to him about these kinds of strategies, such as trying to limit distractions (that meant reducing screentime, Sion was very much aware of his chronically online behavior), exercising regularly, trying to get on his management skills with his time, and most importantly, to be patient with himself.
Sion started to try to do these things.
He tried not to skip his medication, having a detailed planning (on his phone) with the activities he did weekly. He tried journaling, planning, and meditating. At first, those things only kept on adding to his infinite hobby list, but then he tried not to get bored of them. Planning time on his weekly schedule to dedicate to his hobbies was something weird, but he trusted Jungwoo. He felt better after some months, even if progress was something not linear at all, he felt better, overall.
He started noticing how he was improving when his relationships changed for the better. His parents could understand him better because he could explain himself better, he had a better understanding with Riku and Daeyoung, he could be more aware of his surroundings, and starting to live in the moment.
One afternoon, Riku and him were getting out of the gym, both of them feeling exhausted from the training session Sion just pulled for both of them.
“Do you want to stay over? I can ask my mom to make some grilled meat, we can also make tiramisu if you want to” he suggested
“Oh, I would love it!” Riku grinned as they got into the subway train “Dude I hate how fucking crowded the sub gets at this hour”
“I told you a hundred times everyone wants to be out of their houses at eight Riku, we need to come before or after this hour”
“Whatever” his friend resigned “I’m going to tell my dad I won't be coming over for dinner, but please make sure that your mom is okay with me going”
“We have been being friends for five years I don’t think-”
“Please” Riku glanced at him, deadly serious
“Okayyyyyyyyyy”
Sion called his mother and asked her if Riku could come, and of course, she said yes, but that they needed to stop quickly at the grocery store to buy a couple of things. After getting off the subway, they went directly to the store that was right in front of it.
“Get the things to make the tiramisu, I will grab a couple of things extra that my mom asked”
Riku just gave him a thumbs-up, and they parted ways into the grocery store, but they met happily in the queue, ready to pay and get to his house already.
“This is everything?” the cashier asked them nicely “Do you need any bags?”
“One please” Riku said, motioning a one with his index finger
“Perfect, here you have” the cashier gave them a plastic bag, but then he offered them a small card too “Sorry to bother you, but if you don’t mind, I want to give you this card. My best friend is playing this Friday at a close cafeteria at night, it’s kind of an open mic but for starting musicians, if you want to come it would be great! They are going to have some free drinks and pastries. Anyways, here you have it!” he said, letting go of the card in Sion’s hands “You can check out the QR code, it has all the info”
“Thank you! We will look at it” Riku said while Sion looked for his wallet
He paid for the groceries and they scanned the QR code right away. It looked like a nice afternooon event, so as they went directly to his house, they talked about going to this kind of vibey small concert with Daeyoung, not before their mom checked the event and gave them a fondly smile (and permission).
Two days later, the three of them went to the cafeteria called WISH. It was a rather small place but everything was cozy and very well arranged, so even if there were a lot of people, it didn’t feel crowded at all. The small scenario was placed outside, on the terrace, because it was late May, and the weather was spectacular. It turned out to be a pretty great place to be: Sion loved coffee, Daeyoung loved music and Riku loved talking to people, and they were giving away free coffee, there was acoustic nice music, and there were also a lot of people such as some classmates, also the cashier that offered them the card of the event, so it was the perfect Friday afternoon.
“His name is Ryo,” Riku said as he said goodbye to him and joined Sion and Daeyoung again “His friend Yushi is going to sing, I think he’s the next one, should we get closer to the scenario?”
“Yeah!” Daeyoung said
“Let’s go then, let me introduce you to Ryo too”
The three of them got closer to the small stage, in which a girl was singing a cover of one song that Sion couldn’t remember the name of, but she sang so well. He tried to focus on that, but it was difficult because there were so many inputs of distractions: the music was sometimes too loud, sometimes too low, they were giving him a lot of coffee, there were a lot of people, he didn’t know what to do at some points, but being closer to the stage helped him greatly beccause the sounds became more balanced.
Still, nothing compared to when the next boy came up to the stage.
Sion felt his breath missing and his heart skipping a beat, or two.
In front of him, he saw the most beautiful human he had ever seen.
Don’t get him wrong, even if he didn’t have any girlfriend or boyfriend in his seventeenth (close to eighteenth) years, it was mainly because people often had difficulties connecting with him, and he wasn’t the best at communication either, but he knew when someone was pretty, handsome, whatever it was, and the boy that was about to sing was ethereal.
He had the lightest tone of brunette in his hair, which looked incredibly soft, even if he was wearing a beanie. He had big eyes, a thin nose, and such sharp facial features but also soft… it was bubbly, fun, exciting but mostly calm. He waved at everyone shily and introduced himself as Yushi, so it was the cashier’s friend, whose name, Ryo, now knew.
He started singing, and he sang so beautifully that the rest of the world shut down for Sion. Now it didn’t feel anymore like there were so many people, he didn’t feel the caffeine so present in his blood and his head wasn’t rushing anymore. He felt in the moment, grounded, steady.
He was singing a cover too, of a song called ‘Songbird’. He only knew that because he repeated that animal in the chorus a couple of times, and he remembered Daeyoung singing that song too, so it was weirdly comfortable in that sense. The song ended so quickly, and Sion wished he could listen to this boy’s voice for hours, because he was sure he wasn’t ever going to get tired of it.
Because Riku was close to Ryo and another friend, they all went to talk to Yushi as he finished his song. It felt kind of weird, at least for Sion, as he felt like an outsideer, because he could already see how Riku was getting along with Ryo and his friends, and his little brother was making some space for himself too, and the celebration moment felt intimate between this Yushi guy and his friends, but it felt comfortable at the same time because they were genuinely happy for him.
“Yushi you did amazing!” Ryo exclaimed, hugging hardly his friend
“Yes! It was incredible” his brother joined in “Hi, Im Daeyoung”
“I’m Riku, and this is Sion” Sion just bowed, smiling at him
“We met them at the store and I gave them the card”
“You didn’t need to” Yushi whispered, almost flustered
“Well I did, sue me. Oh also, this is Sakuya” Ryo said, introducing the other guy who was with them
“Hello”
They all greeted each other and started engaging in some conversation until the afteroon was almost over. They talked about everything, trying to get to know each other. Ryo and Sakuya were fifteen, and Sion learned that the grocery store they went to was run by Ryo’s family, which is why he was working there. Yushi was the same age as Daeyoung, sixteen, so they were bonding over silly things such as school and people they had in common. They had such a nice time, and they were all getting themselves ready for the result of the poll of this open mic thing, because the prize was some kind of gift card for the cafeteria (and they were starting to serve some nice-looking savory pastries). Somehow, and Sion couldn’t understand why, Yushi didn’t win, and everyone realized he was disappointed with the results, almost ashamed. He didn’t talk much Sion realized, but because of that, his face became the main source of expression, and he looked down.
“I know it’s kind of early but we could go have dinner, I know the best tteobokki is just around the corner, we can even go to Yoyogi Park and have a picnic! If you guys are up to”
“Yoyogi park? Can’t we go to Ueno one?” Riku suggested, already whining
“Whatever you guys want” Ryo continued “But we need to get tteobokki from just around the corner, it’s close”
“You thought Namsan park was close” his brother said
Everyone laughed at his comment, even Yushi who remained nonchalant the whole conversation. Sion wanted to add something funny so he could hear him laugh again, but they were already getting to get some food. He stuck with Sakuya at the back, in front of them Daeyoung and Yushi and leading the group Riku and Ryo, both seemed to know exactly what to do.
It was kind of awkward, but it was okay.
They ended up in the Ueno park, laughing and eating. Sion wished he could have ordered some beer with the tteobokki but he knew it was no place for that, still, it would have helped him with talking to Yushi, because the other guy didn’t say a word during the whole night. Not even a single one, but he had fun anyway. They decided to wrap it up early too, and everyone said goodbye to each other, not without Ryo and Riku exchanging numbers and organizing another meet-up for the next week.
Sion and Daeyoung went to their house, not before stopping in a convenience store and having some late-night ice cream, a sweet treat wasn’t going to kill anyone. When he got in bed, he unlocked his phone to get his alarm ready, when he received a notification.
Okay Yushi was cute. Too cute.