Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Oldfuck91: guess what I foubd

EmoTaylor: What did you find, Faker?

Oldfuck91: penis hhehew
also a tomb

EmoTaylor: Mature.

KitsuneGaming92: A tomb? Like, an undiscovered one?

Oldfuck91: i mwan
its discovered
now
so
uh
yeah
so

KitsuneGaming92: Do you mind taking photos of anything interesting to put in the database?

Oldfuck91: yeh
aure bud
OHH
@greenpisser
ull like thid

greenpisser: begging for name perms plssss!!!!

Oldfuck91: no lol
anyway
its an ancient echidna tomb
so
wanna see some coold stuff

EmoTaylor: How did you even find it?

Oldfuck91: uh
fell
lols

EmoTaylor: Gaia give me patience.

Oldfuck91: [echidnastuffz.img] [echidnastuffz1.img] [echidnastuffz2.img] [echidnastuffz3.img]

greenpisser: interesting
I recognize some stuff, similar burial rites and all, but the language is a bit different

KitsuneGaming92: How so?

EmoTaylor: You can see what's in those photos? It looks like Sonic just got access to a camera for the first time

Oldfuck91: hey+!!!

greenpisser: It says, at least from how I translate it, "Oh bark to sea, from earth to heavens. Scream, mouth of brave heart. Rest is long and weary."
how did u kno its echidna

Oldfuck91: YOU WOLL NOT BELIEVE THISM
i actyally killed thia guy :)

greenpisser: what

Oldfuck91: he was tryna kill Kori :(
shes the one who first met chaos btdubs

greenpisser: valid argument

KitsuneGaming92: You can't just say that about murder Knuckles!

greenpisser: I do what I want
also like
self defense

KitsuneGaming92: You're a terrible influence Sonic

Oldfuck91: :)
now that i knows this is Locks tomb i think i coulld fin d the ruins
wanna meet up lads

greenpisser: cant
actualylt
sure give me a sec

KitsuneGaming92: I have to make sure you don't commit murder

Oldfuck91: @Skulls_With_Bows @jackalfucker
Wanna join

EmoTaylor: Not inviting me or Rouge?

Oldfuck91: no
i don like u
bleh

EmoTaylor: "bleh" to you too.

Oldfuck91: i hope ur chao bites u

EmoTaylor: <3

Skulls_With_Bows: i got a girl date with Rouge and Blaze tmrw soz

greenpisser: hooray

jackalfucker: WHY IS THIA MYA NAME SONIC GO DROWN PLSSSEAsniwkwnsowk
also nah im hanging with barry tmrw

Oldfuck91: side character ah reaction

jackalfucker: 🙄🖕💔💢

Oldfuck91: grrrrrrrrrr

jackalfucker: furry

EmoTaylor: We're all furries technically
wait arent furries racist

jackalfucker: i forgot you were sentient

EmoTaylor: shhh

jackalfucker: THERIANS OMG

EmoTaylor: That's gotta be racist

bestboy: is Sonic Man does furry or therian

EmoTaylor: Neither??? He's Sonic Man, not fucking hedgehog boy

Oldfuck91: OI SHADOW FUCK OFF I DON'T WANT YOU HERE

EmoTaylor: You can see me?
Also harsh

Oldfuck91: Shit
also yiu dont deserve my love
stole my chilidog

KitsuneGaming92: You like chilidogs, Shadow?

EmoTaylor: You're not slick faker, I can see you
@KitsuneGaming92 I like stuff more when it's a limited resource and it belongs to Sonic
Example, I stole his left socks last week

Oldfuck91: I KNEW IT
HOW DARE YOU
I WAS A KING
AND A PRINCE
AND 
I DUNNO BUT LIKE
IM REALLY COOL YOU ASS

EmoTaylor: Turn around....

greenpisser: thanks for the scream Sonic

Chapter Text

KitsuneGaming92: [EchidnaTomb.zip] [EchidnaRuins.zip]

jackalfucker: is that a zipbomb

KitsuneGaming92: No! Why would I do that!?

Skulls_With_Bows: :)

jackalfucker: i was joking tails 
prommi!!!

KitsuneGaming92: Ok?
Sonic, are you and Shadow okay?

EmoTaylor: grrr im emo

KitsuneGaming92: Ah, you're dead. Can I have your biplane please?

EmoTaylor: NO SHES MINE!!
I Luve herrrr
My darling Tornado 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

jackalfucker: shadow will kill you
lights off is such a banger

EmoTaylor: ita jarka  dor my chilja msonqkqk

jackalfucker: sir this is a wendys

Skulls_With_Bows: I had a crush on this guy?

jackalfucker: kqo1naoqkkqkqk1k1k1k2kk2k2k2k2k2kk22kk2k2k2k2k2k2k2kwk2k2kwkkwkwkwkwkwkqkqkqqkqkqkkw

Skulls_With_Bows: Whats wrong with you?

jackalfucker: SORRY THE WISPS JUMPED ME

DraculauraWho_: Hello darlings, what's going on with all of you?

Skulls_With_Bows: The boys explored some old ruins Sonic remembered existed
Files in the pinned image

DraculauraWho_: Without me? How rude!

EmoTaylor: I'm going to become a cannibal

DraculauraWho_: I didn't know you were a mother Shads

EmoTaylor: What?

Skulls_With_Bows: There's a reason hedgehog fathers spend more time with babies in the beginning

EmoTaylor: That is deeply concerning actually. I'm letting Sonic go because of this, make sure he thanks you

DraculauraWho_: That tomb message is odd, first part is definitely meant to say something about trees though

jackalfucker: @everyone for Barry's birthday lets do a murder mystery
itll be funny

bestboy: NO
NO
NO

KitsuneGaming92: YES

bestboy: NO
Son1c w1ll d1e aga1n 1 swear broo

DraculauraWho_: Is your phone good

bestboy: 1 broke someth1nf somehow
cant use eyes
1s
ssqjww

DraculauraWho_: You poor dear

Skulls_With_Bows: Don't worry Barry! We'll get you something cooler
Prommie :3

bestboy: Why can't you guys be more l1ke Miss Amy smh

KitsuneGaming92: Friendship ended with Barry
Karen is my new bestie

greenpisser: [dance.mp3]

Skulls_With_Bows: Is that Shadow dancing?

jackalfucker: WHERE ARE YOU GUYS????

greenpisser: sonic conviced shadow to go dancing
we're in capital city

KitsuneGaming92: That's halfway across the globe

greenpisser: ye

KitsuneGaming92: LOL I FORGOT SONIC CAN CARRY YOU
have a good day sir

DraculauraWho_: Try and get Sonic hammered

Skulls_With_Bows: He's legally 16

KitsuneGaming92: Nah, he's legally 22
Everyone sorta just knows his "actual" age so
It's prolly fine

greenpisser: HE DATED THE BARKEEPS AUNT LIKE SEVENTY YEARS AGO THATS CRAZY
sonic has acquired drinks for all of us

jackalfucker: wish i was there

DraculauraWho_: Alcohol doesn't even work on Shadow I've tried

jackalfucker: I coulda had his drink!!!
@peakthemesong take me out to a bar some day plsplsplspkspsl

peakthemesong: no.

jackalfucker: 😭

DraculauraWho_: I'll take you, dw babes

jackalfucker: Saint Rouge coming in clutch

peakthemesong: why am i even here
im meant to be dead

EmoTaylor: He has a point why is infinite here

peakthemesong: how dare you not capitalise my name

EmoTaylor: You can teleport right?

peakthemesong: why
want to have a distance fight or some mid shit like that you beta cuck

EmoTaylor: Sonic says he'll get you a couple rounds if you show up

peakthemesong: fuck it sure

Oldfuck91: HELL YEAH
LETS GO!!!

jackalfucker: people are gonna beat the poor jackal up you know

peakthemesong: i can take them
Also WHAT IS YOUR NAME

jackalfucker: I DUNNO THEY WON'T LET ME CHANGE IT

Oldfuck91: :3

jackalfucker: omw to beat you guys up actually

Oldfuck91: you have money for a plane?

jackalfucker: 🖕

Oldfuck91: That's what I thought bitch
imma stay drinking
they playing my sonf holynekwksb!!!!
WILL THW WHOLE WORLD KNOW TOU3 NAME!!!!! 

greenpisser: Sonix get off the phone

Oldfuck91: fien
fine

Chapter Text

Oldfuck91: WHERES THE CHAOS EMERALDS
ITS AN EMERGENCY
PLS

Skulls_With_Bows: Whats wrong? Is Eggman attacking again?

Oldfuck91: ITS WORSE
FAR WORSE

DraculauraWho_: Oh dear

EmoTaylor: Are you overreacting?

Oldfuck91: Nuh uh

greenpisser: Someone shot Eggman
bro is dead

Oldfuck91: I DON'T WANNA GO TO SLEEP YET I WAS WAITING FOR AT LEAST TWO OF YOU RO DIE OF OLD AGE
Can we rez eggyu please

EmoTaylor: NO???

DraculauraWho_: Eggman dying is a good thing blue

Oldfuck91: yeah but then I'm gonna hibernate
i dont wanna do thaf :*
:(

greenpisser: You realize he isn't actually dead yet right
just heal him

Oldfuck91: I DON'T HAVE A CHAOS EMERALD KNUCKLES

greenpisser: tf are you then???

EmoTaylor: Why are you siding with that idiot

greenpisser: im not
sorta
i don't want sonic to die just yet

Oldfuck91: *sleep
I can't die

greenpisser: Tomato Tomato

Oldfuck91: Also I can't heal people thanks :)

greenpisser: have you tried? have you truly given it your all?
loser mentality fr

KitsuneGaming92: I'll be right there Sonic dw

EmoTaylor: I can and will beat the fox up

KitsuneGaming92: Catch these bullets you edgehog peice of shit

StrawberrySweetCake: You're all lucky that my mum trusts you

KitsuneGaming92: soz cream mb

jackalfucker: simp
WHAT EHO SAID THAT WHOAS

KitsuneGaming92: I am an incredible shot btw

jackalfucker: mb slime

OneWithTheShadows: What if I killed a man

jackalfucker: What

greenpisser: Espio tf
he went offline whag a bastard smh

Oldfuck91: [suckerpunch.mp3]
any2ays imma go help tails

DraculauraWho_: DAMN
RIP Tails

StrawberrySweetCake: I hope he's okay!!

jackalfucker: thats going in the file

Skulls_With_Bows: Get a job you wackass druggie

jackalfucker: bro 😰
Amy...
im a nepo baby

Skulls_With_Bows: No you're not, don't lie

jackalfucker: one can dream
i dunno what job to even get tbh
or how to get one
ahhhhh
nah
too scary actually

Oldfuck91: a war isn't scary
but a job app is

jackalfucker: what happened to helping tails

Oldfuck91: he shot shadow
so we're just waiting for eggy to wake up and leave
this is abojt you anywho

jackalfucker: grrr

bestboy: you can work w1th me for a b1t ^-^

jackalfucker: BARRY YOU ABSOLUTE ANGEL

bestboy: :D

Oldfuck91 added FoldedLikeAnOmelette

Skulls_With_Bows: We DO NOT like you that much Sonic

Oldfuck91: its funny tho

NoUse: SONIC HAVE YOU KISSED A HUMAN BEFORE

Oldfuck91: ye lol
why

NoUse: I OWE SHADOW TEN BUCJS
BYE

Oldfuck91: bye silv

EmoTaylor: yoU FUCKINF WHAT

Oldfuck91: so thats how silver fucks himself over, thats funny

---Meanwhile, in the future---

UltimateGaylord: Omega please.
please stop. begin.g

OmegaWolf: I AM A SIGMA MALE, SHADOW

NoUse: what did I return too

UltimateGaylord: Hand over the money, Silver.

NoUse: u so mean babes 😘😅

UltimateGaylord: Bold words for someone in shooting range.

NoUse: Okay :(
So how did you know about Sonic kissing a human?

---Back in the Past---

peakthemesong: you're on my hitlist barry the quokka

bestboy: D:
What d1d 1 doo???

jackalfucker: leave my boy alone!!!

peakthemesong: he's a gryffindor and im a slytherin. were sworn enemies

jackalfucker: dumbass mentality

EmoTaylor: im goi g blind from all this colour tf

Oldfuck91: reminded of how humans have this weird thing called homophobia
like bitch
we aint tryna survive to the next day anymore its the 21st century

KitsuneGaming92: IM ALIVE!!!
FUCK YOU SHADOW

EmoTaylor: bleh

Chapter Text

Skulls_With_Bows: I propose we attempt to have a normal, serious, conversation

jackalfucker: about what?
pokemon?

Skulls_With_Bows: Did I not tell you to get a job

jackalfucker: i start next week :)

Skulls_With_Bows: K.

jackalfucker: 😭😭😭

DraculauraWho_: How about something people wouldn't expect to be true? Like a fact about ourselves

Skulls_With_Bows: That sounds fun! @everyone join if you'd like!

KitsuneGaming92: Oh, easy. I have frequent contact with my parents.

DraculauraWho_: Not to be rude but I thought they were dead or something
Don't you live with Amy?

KitsuneGaming92: Yeah, and before that Sonic was around.

jackalfucker: where are your parents now?

KitsuneGaming92: Jail.

jackalfucker: whiplash tf

KitsuneGaming92: It's a long story lol

jackalfucker: we're besties pls give the deets
unless ya don't wanna

KitsuneGaming92: Nah, I'm cool with it
Basically my parents were crooks so they lost custody of me when I was really young, cause jailtime. So, my aunt took me in, but she sucked so I was taken away and sent to a couple foster homes. One of the homes already had kids and they bullied me so now I'm with Amy.

Skulls_With_Bows: Yeah, what he said

DraculauraWho_: And you talk to your parents
still?

KitsuneGaming92: They get to leave in a couple of years I think :)
They're chill, promised to give up crime for good after I yelled at them long enough

jackalfucker: actual saint
ur so cool tails

KitsuneGaming92: Danke

DraculauraWho_: Don't think I could beat that tbh, uh
Wait I'm really one-note give me a minute

jackalfucker: mood

Skulls_With_Bows: I'm distantly related to Eggman via adoption

jackalfucker: WHFAT
WHAT

KitsuneGaming92: I didn't even know this??

Skulls_With_Bows: I had a talk with my great grandma before she passed, and apparently her father's last name was Robotnik. He'd been adopted during a civil war

DraculoraWho_: Amy babes, how am I supposed to top this stuff! I'm not nearly as secretive as you all think

jackalfucker: Uh... fuck I dunno
Infinite is my ex?

KitsuneGaming92: I thought y'all were still dating

jackalfucker: WE'RE NOT???

KitsuneGaming92: I'm joking, but we all knew this

jackalfucker: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TOP TRAGIC BACKSTORY #362 AND BEING
RELATED TO EGGMAN
ON A TECHNICALITY BUT STILL

DraculoraWho_: I think I have something I suppose

Skulls_With_Bows: Go on Rouge!

DraculoraWho_: Okay so, I'm sort of disowned from my family? Not because they're bad or anything

Skulls_With_Bows: Oh no! Why did they disown you?

DraculoraWho_: I... may have stolen several family heirlooms and pawned them off

KitsuneGaming92: Dear Gaia that's not good at all

jackalfucker: being so fr I thought you were gonna mention the human hybrid thing

KitsuneGaming92: HUH????
Sorry
WHAT

DraculoraWho_: I thought you knew this Tails?
Also, Gadget shut the fuck up
Also, also, I'm working on getting as many of the heirlooms as I can find back but it's difficult

KitsuneGaming92: Give me your blood

Skulls_With_Bows: At least you're doing a good thing Rouge
Tails be quiet you vampire

KitsuneGaming92: Harpy ah response

Skulls_With_Bows: That's it, I'm stealing your tools

KitsuneGaming92: NO
I'LL TELL MILO

Skulls_With_Bows: I'll tell my mum then
Hey Infinite kisser, it's your turn

jackalfucker: I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING MAN

OneWithTheShadows: I did drugs before the Chaotix.

jackalfucker: what
i
what does this mean
espio
.
.
ESPIO YOU PIECE OF SHIT DON'T JUST GO OFFLINE AFTER A BOMBSHELL LIKE THAT

Skulls_With_Bows: Damn, alrigh

KitsuneGaming92: I could see that actually

jackalfucker: WELL I CAN'T??

KitsuneGaming92: You've met him once (1)

jackalfucker: sobbing rn
FUCK MY APARTMENT IS ON FIRE BRB

Skulls_With_Bows: Anyone else have anything cool about them?

Oldfuck91: Can I even say anything?

Skulls_With_Bows: No we just expect the weird stuff from you Sonic

Oldfuck91: Fair enough tbh
WAIT I HAVE ONE
nvm

greenpisser: i used to eat rocks as a kid

DraculoraWho_: This is extremely expected Knuckie

greenpisser: shut up

bestboy: Hey um, why 1s Eggman here

Oldfuck91: for the funny

Chapter Text

EmoTaylor: Are the two idiots dead?
Scratch that, is everyone dead?

DraculauraWho_: It’s 3am

EmoTaylor: Not for all of us. And I’m surprised they haven’t said anything all day

DraculauraWho_: Oh yeah, you’re right
@Oldfuck91 @KitsuneGaming92 @Skulls_With_Bows @jackalfucker @greenpisser
Are you dears all okay?

EmoTaylor: Wait, Rouge why are you awake

DraculauraWho_: Why are YOU awake, mister?

EmoTaylor: I’m the Ultimate Lifeform, Rouge
I don’t need sleep, sleep needs me

DraculauraWho_: Well I’m doing paperwork. It’s making me wish I still worked full time for GUN

EmoTaylor: Real
I like the shop though, it’s fun
No
Nice
It’s nice

DraculauraWho_: Go to bed hon

EmoTaylor: Nah I’m fine

greenpisser: im lookinf after Cream whya do you nedd me
needd*
needj*
FUCK

DraculauraWho_: Just checking in Knuckles

greenpisser: damn bat

DraculauraWho_: Love you too~

greenpisser: 🖕

EmoTaylor: Well that’s him, but what of the others?

DraculauraWho_: I’m sure it’s fine Shadow
Now go to bed, please

EmoTaylor: I’d win

DraculauraWho_: Bro what

EmoTaylor: I’d win

Oldfuck91: NO TOU WOUALNT YOU PEICE OF SHIT.
WGOOPS DIDNT MEANT RO
UH

EmoTaylor: Wtf faker

Oldfuck91: AINAISKEKDKKXKEK
FUCK
I DELEL
FELL*
I FELL
MB

EmoTaylor: WHERE ARE YOU?!?

Oldfuck91: Uhhqjajjaiqja not anywhere in Mobius thata for fuckin sure

DraculauraWho_: What’s with you hedgehogs and not sleeping?

Oldfuck91: I am god bitch

Skulls_With_Bows: just saw the ping
SONIC GO TO SLEEP, TAILS NEARLY CRASHED US

Oldfuck91: you problem

EmoTaylor: Rouge

DraculauraWho_: What happened to Sonic?
Why is he not sleeping, I mean

Oldfuck91: im plak2ying playing* the nnighy is lava

EmoTaylor: That’s quite stupid tbh

Oldfuck91: i dont want do die thansks

Skulls_With_Bows: If you keep running you’ll hibernate

Oldfuck91: nuhuh im better than all of you
ill juat heal whatever braim damage i recievd

EmoTaylor: @Skulls_With_Bows Wake up Tails and send me Sonic’s tracker access

Oldfuck91: NOQ AMES PLS DON'T
THIS IS BULLYING
HARASSMENT EVEN
LET ME BE FREE I BEG

Skulls_With_Bows: You’re getting muted for an hour Sonic
@EmoTaylor you should have it now

EmoTaylor: Thanks

—9am somewhere—

jackalfucker: @EmoTaylor I was AT MY JOB
LIKE Y'ALL TOLD ME TOO
SOME OF US HAVE LIVES SHADOW

bestboy: Gadget, can you get back to work please?

jackalfucker: Yes my king, sorry my king

peakthemesong: your days are numbered barry the quokka

bestboy: 😥

Chapter Text

Oldfuck91: [sleepyshads.img]
GUYS LOOK

EmoTaylor: DELETE THAT NOW

bestboy: S0 1'm guess1ng y0u b0th g0t sleep 1n the end?

Oldfuck91: dude that is seriously concerning
please get a new phone
or talk to tails he'll give ya a new one

KitsuneGaming92: Don't speak for me.
But yeah, Barry I can make you a new phone for like twenty rings it ain't that hard

bestboy: 1t's all g00d, pr0m1se!

Skulls_With_Bows: Shadow you look absolutely adorbs sleeping ^w^
Sonic don't take photos of people sleeping

Oldfuck91: the fuck did i do??

EmoTaylor: Post the picture obviously

Oldfuck91: go choke on weed

Skulls_With_Bows: Barry, how's Gadget doing at work? Is he cleaning, I hope he's cleaning

Oldfuck91: get off his back ames
rookie deserved a break after the war

Skulls_With_Bows: You're still on thin ice from that btw
And with these stunts you keep pulling with your abilities, you're VERY lucky I haven't killed you myself

Oldfuck91: yeesh

bestboy: Gadget has been l0vely M1ss Amy! He's ah, qu1te l1ke y0u M1ster S0n1c! Are y0u sure y0u guys aren't related?

Oldfuck91: never call me mister again
btw if i dies its a-shadow

DraculauraWho_: Noted and trashed

Oldfuck91: meanie!!!
@bestboy he might be? idk ive had MANY flings

Skulls_With_Bows: Thanks gramps, go take your meds

Oldfuck91: >:(
jkjnmn
n
You guys get Sonic privileges after I beat his ass.

DraculauraWho_: Take your time ^-^

Oldfuck91: I will.

bestboy: 1t w0n't really be that bad, r1ght?

Skulls_With_Bows: .

bestboy: R1ght?

Skulls_With_Bows: Sonic'll live

Chapter Text

jackalfucker: @EmoTaylor what timeline is this
Silver ahh question

EmoTaylor: DM me this stuff???

jackalfucker: dms r off :pensive_em ogi:

EmoTaylor: I don’t fucking know, figure it out yourself?

jackalfucker: ass
tits
balls
hehehhehwhjejwj

EmoTaylor: You’re the pinnacle of maturity

jackalfucker: i am TAME compared to your ass like five years ago

EmoTaylor: How do you know what I was like five years ago?

jackalfucker: sonic sent receipts when i asked who’d said slurs before
@Skulls_With_Bows for shame

Skulls_With_Bows: FOR THE LAST TIME I WAS TRICKED BY THE VINEGAR THING
If anything Charmy has said it the most

jackalfucker: sauce?

Skulls_With_Bows: Give me ten years to find it

bestboy: @jackalfucker W3’r3 b3f0r3 Fr0nt13rs

jackalfucker: thanks pooks

peakthemesong: .
its over for you lil bro.

bestboy: What
WA1T WHY 1S TH3R3 B0SS MUS1C

Oldfuck91 has changed peakthemesong ’s name to SimpTimesInfinity

Oldfuck91: [suckerpunchv2.vid]

jackalfucker: HELP HIM!?!?

Oldfuck91: ofc who di u take me for
do*
aight going

NoUse: ehy is Infinite tje ovedloard of this workd

Skulls_With_Bows: You good Silver?

NoUse: Soru dizsy

EmoTaylor: The Jackal is overthinking things and not like, doing anything with his crush

jackalfucker: JIS WHAT
WHO???

EmoTaylor: …
Dumb
Dumb as hell

Skulls_With_Bows: Yeesh

jackalfucker: twllele me please i hat when people hide stuff

Skulls_With_Bows: Let me get over my bafflement

EmoTaylor: I’m not saying shit
This is not my business at all
In fact, I have machines to stock and plants to water

Skulls_With_Bows: Well uh, Gadget
Infinite likes someone in this chat
and

SimpTimesInfinity: SHUT YOUR TRAP RIGHT NOW HEDGEHOG
I WILL DESECRATE YOUR GRAVE

Skulls_With_Bows: My bad gang

jackalfucker: Hatred. Malice even.

—Sometime Later—

StrawberrySweetCake: Guys!!

DraculoraWho_: What’s up dear?

StrawberrySweetCake: Knuckles isn’t responding to my mum’s messages does anyone know why?

jackalfucker: he's fine
probably

EmoTaylor: Sonic is with him

jackalfucker: yeah, he’s fine :)

EmoTaylor: I did not say that.

jackalfucker: and i oop

DraculauraWho_: Should we go look for them Shadow?

EmoTaylor: No
I'm going to have a nap
Breaking the third wall hurts my head

jackalfucker: arent we fourth wall

EmoTaylor: Depends on the medium

DraculauraWho_: You two confuse me sometimes

EmoTaylor: 👍
Night.

Chapter Text

StrawberrySweetCake: @Oldfuck91 Mr. Sonic, would you marry anyone?

DraculauraWho_: That is certainly a question ya got there Cream

Oldfuck91: yeag
what brought thqt up?

StrawberrySweetCake: Curiousity mainly

Oldfuck91: fair
prolly shadow
or someone else who is immortal

DraculauraWho_: Interesting answer Blue

Oldfuck91: i try

EmoTaylor: I
What???

Oldfuck91: well if we were hypotehtiflly togethrr itd be somwhta easier if gueess

EmoTaylor: Did you fucking trip tf
Hypothetically*

Oldfuck91: cuz ur fast and im fast and we both live long
the only con is that i hibernate when i get too bored

EmoTaylor: Are you calling me boring?

Oldfuck91: mayhaps
hE9LP
HE THEKW A PILLPW AT ME

EmoTaylor: Karma.

Oldfuck91: @Skulls_With_Bows AMES JELP PLSS IM BEINF ATTACKED
IM DYUNG AT THE HANDS OF A RECOLIUR

Skulls_With_Bows: Sorgy wrong numbr
try again :)

Oldfuck91: u b
AH
im hidden
somehere he can't find me

EmoTaylor: Rouge, he broke my fucking roof

DraculauraWho_: What a shame
I'm not paying for it

EmoTaylor: Villain arc time

Oldfuck91: YOU HOG YOU ALREADY HAD UR VILLAIN ARC

EmoTaylor: Found you

Oldfuck91: what

EmoTaylor: [ dumbass.img ]
This you cuz?

Oldfuck91: nuh uh

SimpTimesInfinity: now im curious, who would everyone marry
@jackalfucker you should answer this

Skulls_With_Bows: Oh you are DOWN BAD down bad

SimpTimesInfinity: Shut up

jackalfucker: prolly barry ngl
he's cool :)

bestboy: Th@nk5 dud3
1 @m v3ry @fr@1d 0f 1nf1n1t3 th0

SimpTimesInfinity: As you should be.

DraculoraWho_: Did you guys ever actually meet up?

jackalfucker: ye
he tried to lower my guard with a cake
it didnt work tho!!!

DraculoraWho_: Oh honey that's not,,,
I feel bad for you Infinite

SimpTimesInfinity: shut up wohamns

DraculoraWho_: Nevermind go fuck yourself

SimpTimesInfinity: u 2

EmoTaylor: For a Chaos Emerald, Sonic is surprisingly breakable

DraculoraWho_: And how do you know that?

EmoTaylor: . . .

DraculoraWho_: I'll go get a medkit

Chapter Text

Oldfuck91: WHQK RHE FUCK SYATERD RHE RMWOIR

greenpisser: what

KitsuneGaming92: Why is fuck the only word you spelt right

Oldfuck91: yall siriously havemt looked online
peoplae are saying im afraid of water
ME
THE RUNS ON WATER GUY!!!!

greenpisser: i play games all dag
day*

KitsuneGaming92: Brother I was building a doohickey
Why would I have been online

Oldfuck91: go eat

KitsuneGaming92: Already did

Oldfuck91: cool
wHO STARTED RJHW RIMOUR

greenpisser: @EmoTaylor

Oldfuck91: SHADOW WAS IT YOU

KitsuneGaming92: So you can spell that right.

EmoTaylor: Fuck off no
I'm debriefing rn

greenpisser: yoi got hired again?

EmoTaylor: You make it sound like it's uncommon

greenpisser: you like
concussed a guy last time

EmoTaylor: And?

DraculoraWho_: You should really stop doing that

EmoTaylor: My bad.

Oldfuck91: GUYS??? HELLO???

EmoTaylor: Shut up Sonic

Oldfuck91: @hiphopshit WAS IT U???

NoUse: lads tge futre in dnger
sonikc becam a tirant

KitsuneGaming92: Dude

NoUse: time travl hard man

bestboy: 1ł5 @!! g00d5 :)

NoUse: r u ok

bestboy: /\/0 101

NoUse: @KitsuneGaming92 what is he satibg

KitsuneGaming92: Do I look like I know

greenpisser: he said "no lol"

NoUse: how did yu know that

greenpisser: aftee tails got me internet i just played video games
i also joined a few chatrooms
social media is a curse btw

bestboy: 7|-|@7$ 7|2v3

greenpisser: ok that i cant decipher

hiphopshit: I forgot this existed ngl
Why was I pinged

KitsuneGaming92: Sonic is tryna figure out who spread the "rumour" that he's afraid of water

hiphopshit: I barely have the money for data bro

Oldfuck91: i forgor
u broke ass bitch

hiphopshit: [sonicip.png] This you chat?

Oldfuck91: JOEKS IM HOMELESS

hiphopshit: I can arrest you
@KitsuneGaming92 Wanna help

KitsuneGaming92: Sure

Oldfuck91: hey now

EmoTaylor: He's at my place rn

Oldfuck91: shads .

EmoTaylor: I'm not one to disobey the law, Sonic

Oldfuck91: HE AINT EVEN A COP

EmoTaylor: I could arrest you, technically

OneWithTheShadows: [Sonic can't swim.vid]

Oldfuck91: You.
It is over for you.
No 1-UPs, no rings...
You will endure the pits of hell alone.

KitsuneGaming92: Dang

hiphopshit: Oh hi Espio 0/

OneWithTheShadows: 0/

jackalfucker: oh now you talk
.
and hes gone the flaky prick
anyways is it true that sonic cant swim

NoUse: Yeah 👍

Oldfuck91: it is ON SIGHT cucker

Chapter Text

Oldfuck91 has kicked StrawberrySweetCake

hiphopshit: Harsh

EmoTaylor: Wait, why?

Oldfuck91: @everyone after a chat witj cream we deaci8wd to kicke her from the gx
gc*

EmoTaylor: Decided.*

Oldfuck91: whatevers
all this being said
favourite apocalyptic evebt and why

NoUse: What a question.

Oldfuck91: mb gang

NoUse: preferably utopia shticks because
at least people are alive
i can work with living people
dead people i cannot

jackalfucker: zombie apocalypse!!!!
nuclear fallouts are a close second tho
basic i may but free im

Oldfuck91: no but fr zomvies are peak
duing ar truce eggman and i consideefe the idea of robot zombiws
he said it qas dumb :/

FoldedLikeAnOmlette: Because it was you imbecile.

hiphopshit: talk about a jumpscare
you never said he was here

Oldfuck91: I forgot I added you tbh

greenpisser: kick him
please
pleadr
please
oleasee

Oldfuck91: egghead whatss ur facvw apocalypse

FoldedLikeAnOmlette: Ironically enough, nuclear fallouts.

EmoTaylor: Hmph.
All I'll say is that a mysterious virus is perhaps my personal favourite

Skulls_With_Bows: Shadow just pulled out a vase that looks like Sonic and shot it
What did you do?

Oldfuck91: jit trippin ong fr no cap skibidi

Skulls_With_Bows: Oh yeah Eggman is here
Kick him

Oldfuck91: ping my bboi epsio he mod

Skulls_With_Bows: He isn't going to reply AT ALL chat

Oldfuck91: @everyone favourite apocalypse event NOW!!
ignorr this if you already said urs

Skulls_With_Bows: Fine
Anything that results in unconventional living spaces
Like Oil Rig cities and stuff, love me some displays of resilience

hiphopshit: Oh yeah, i get that!! mines probs cyber dystopia
Espio says his is dystopias
Rebellion by stealth is entertaining to him

Chatyppwj: N
I
G

Oldfuck91 has muted Chatyppwj for 24 hours

Oldfuck91: nah
id win
..
what if we made an apocalypse to see 2ho would survien in oen

Skulls_With_Bows: Please don't, I got stuff to do

Chapter Text

Oldfuck91: [HOMEEE.zip]
GUYS YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE WHERE WE JUST WERE

EmoTaylor: Oh yay, you are back. (heavy sarcasm)

StrawberrySweetCake: Where?

Oldfuck91: MY HOMEEE YAYYAYQUWJIANWKSM
I HAVEN'T BEEN TO MY ISLANDS IN LIKE
A MILLENNIA
dont actually remember how long BUT STILL

greenpisser: it was great aside from the fact I spent my time trapped in cyberspace

DraculauraWho_: Is that so?

jackalfucker: why are we the only people ever talking on here
i feel like that should be addressed

Oldfuck91: ROUGE YOU WOULD ABSOLUTELY LOVE THE RUINS
ITS NOT JEWELS BUT LIKE
ANCIENT SHIT

DraculauraWho_: Oh? I'll take a look at that file later then

EmoTaylor: I'm going back to bed

StrawberrySweetCake: What about Tails and Amy? Were they trapped too? :(

greenpisser: yeah, but sonic saved them
again

Oldfuck91: B'P
theyre all good cream!! just talking about future plans rn
@EmoTaylor mind if i drop by for a nap
i nearly suffered some severe amnesia
shits tiring

EmoTaylor: If you shut the fuck up then sure
You're staying on the couch tho

DraculauraWho_: The couch is my place Shadow! How dare you!

bestboy: Gl@d y0u'r3 b@ck S0n1c!!

Oldfuck91: Barry I am forcing you to get a new phone

peakthemesong: @jackalfucker

jackalfucker: what jackass

peakthemesong: i know you're at Apotos rn
town centre, 2pm sharp

jackalfucker: aight??

greenpisser: miracles do come true

Oldfuck91: YU1OAOWOSNKAJWJW YOOO
WELLL DOWKNE BICTH

peakthemesong: kys

Oldfuck91: nah
im already bored actually
@EmoTaylor im outside

EmoTaylor: you haves akey
use ot
or*
it**

DraculauraWho_: Wait since when did Sonic get a key

EmoTaylor: dw bout kt
now let me aleep for the love of chaos

Oldfuck91: thanka shads!!!

Skulls_With_Bows: @jackalfucker @jackalfucker @jackalfucker

jackalfucker: EHAT

Skulls_With_Bows: [Charmy slur challenge.zip]
found it

jackalfucker: aight respec given

Skulls_With_Bows: 👍