Chapter Text
The car door slams shut behind Cassie, the noise echoes in the empty street. The dirty streetlights make the damp concrete road glow under the stars, and Cassie knows the tears on her cheeks also glisten in the light.
Her mother stands on her porch, withering glare fived on the dark car. Cassie sighs and turns around, waving through the window at her dad, silently telling him she’ll be fine. She forcefully empties her lungs again, preparing herself for the coming confrontation.
“Come on, I don’t have all day.” Sarah’s voice sounds harsh in the night, and Cassie shivers. She blames it on the cold breeze.
“It’s night anyway.” Cassie fails to hide the venom in her words.
“Don’t get smart with me.” Sarah holds the door open until Cassie crosses the threshold, and locks it behind them. “Dinner is ready, don’t bother unpacking now.”
Cassie stands in the hallway, taking in the unfamiliar environment. Her mother seems to have forgotten she hasn’t been in the house before.
“I don’t even get a tour ?” Her words come out as a question, against her best efforts.
Sarah pauses in front of the coffee machine, seemingly considering her daughter’s words.
“Right.” She sets the pot on the fire again, and turns to Cassie, gesturing for her to follow. “Kitchen, obviously. Dining and sitting room.” She pats a pillow as she walks near the couch.
Cassie eyes her mother wearily. The tour is just an excuse to talk to her, she’s seen the house plan on her mother’s old table, anyway. The third stair creaks under their feet when they head upstairs, Cassie takes note of it and files the information away silently.
Sarah points to the first door on their left. “My room.” Then to the one on the opposite side. “Yours.”
Cassie steps around her mother to tug open the door to her new bedroom. She’s pleasantly surprised when she sees light grey walls and new furniture. Not something she’d ever tell her mother.
“I tried to keep it simple. You can buy more stuff later.” Sarah nods at Cassie. She doesn’t waste time waiting for her as she walks further down the hall.
“Last door is the bathroom, it’s slightly bigger than the old one, so I better not see your stuff all over the counter.” Sarah smiles to herself, and only the mirror catches it.
Cassie groans quietly, the wall between them hides her grimace. Her mother really can’t say one sentence without somehow berating her. She doesn’t answer, but she drops her bag on the floor, near the foot of the bed. The room really is quite simple, a built-in closet, enough for her clothes, a desk wide enough to hold her books, and a large bed, something she’s been wanting for years. One the wall, she finds a bookshelf, and the white curtains around the window sway when she walks closer to look out.
The view isn’t all that interesting, but behind the few houses, a large city park spreads in green hills and naked trees. It shouldn’t matter, but she smiles anyway. She’ll take a far away park over the crumbling concrete buildings around her mother’s old house.
She looks at the window closely, relieved to find a proper latch and nothing beyond the glass to prevent sneaking out. She’s not necessarily proud of it, but going out in the dead of night has become a regular event. Cassie doesn’t mean trouble, she just wants out of the controlling hand of her mother.
Speaking of the woman, she stands at the door, observing her daughter, lips pursed and arms taut across her chest.
“Once you’re done day-dreaming, come downstairs.” Sarah lets her arms down to point at the stairs. “Food is gonna get cold.”
Still facing away from her, Cassie nods. “Coming.”
She waits until she can’t hear her mother’s footsteps anymore, and she collapses sideways on her bed. The mattress is cold against her skin, and she wonders about bedsheets for a second. Sluggishly, she stands up and walks to the closet to search it. She finds two pillows, still wrapped in plastic, and a set of sheets. She runs a hand over them, the soft fabric under her fingers is a nice bonus to the pretty pattern. Small flowers dot the white sheets in a palette of her favourite colours. She hums, alone in her room, and tugs the set out, throwing it on the mattress. Before she can do anything else, her mother’s voice emerges from the stair case.
“Cassie!” She jumps at the call of her name. “Food is getting cold!”
She relents, finding the idea of another lecture from her mother exhausting enough to leave her bed bare. She laughs at the thought of being an inmate on death row when she walks down the stairs to join her mother in the kitchen. The house is void of any sign of life, ignoring the shoes in the entry and the tattered blanket on the couch. The walls are empty, no frames, or pictures, and the pure white colour reminds her of a hospital. She can’t tell if the familiar air freshener her mother uses is better than the sterile smell of a hospital.
“Get a glass, I forgot to take one for you.” Sarah points to a cabinet above the counter. “Sorry.”
Cassie rolls her eyes when she turns away, hiding her annoyance, but she takes a glass, and fills it at the tap.
“I made mac and cheese. The one you like.” Sarah eyes her daughter, waiting for her reaction.
Cassie doesn’t give her anything, she just hums in acknowledgment. She’s too tired to deal with her mother’s subtle jabs.
They eat in silence. Cassie is peeved that her mother was right, the meal is slightly cold, just enough to be uncomfortable against her tongue. She doesn’t show it, instead eating as fast as she can to escape the tension in the room.
“Don’t rush. We need to talk.” Sarah’s face shows no emotion that Cassie can pick up on. “And you have to unpack at least a little for tonight.”
Cassie sighs, this time heavily, to make sure her mother sees it, and feel her frustration.
Sarah ignores her, but she takes both of their plates to put them in the dishwasher. A nice gesture for someone so cold, Cassie thinks bitterly.
“What do you think of the house so far ?” Sarah cuts to the chase. “I need to do some shopping, so if you need anything, you have to tell me.”
With her mother’s back to her, Cassie feels less inclined to lie her way out of the conversation. “It’s fine. Bigger than I thought.”
“I really tried to get everything you wanted, you know.” Sarah leans against the counter when she turns to face her, eyeing her daughter carefully. “You know I don’t have much, but this is a new start.”
Cassie ponders for a moment, but the words burst out of her. “Why do I have a double bed? I thought they were too expensive.”
“I got a promotion. Don’t tell your father.” Sarah shakes her head at the thought. “He’ll find something to say about that.”
Cassie rolls her eyes, tired of her mother’s animosity towards her ex husband. “He doesn’t care. And I thought your boss hated you.”
“So did I.” Sarah sighs, her shoulders visibly sagging when she looks at the clock above the kitchen door. “I’m tired. Let’s make this quick.”
Cassie unconsciously straightens up, hands tucked between her thighs in anticipation.
“No smoking or drinking in the house. No parties unless I or your father agree to it. No sneaking out, no inviting friends through the window.” Sarah looks up at the ceiling in thoughts. “Pretty much the same as the old house. If you behave correctly, I might be more lenient. Maybe you could go to a friends’ house during the week, or invite some friends over for a get-together. And you’re getting older, so I don’t want to give you a phone curfew. Don’t take advantage of it.” She glances at her daughters with a pointed stare.
Cassie’s eyes widen in surprise. “That’s a lot of changes.” She immediately regrets her words, worried her mother will backtrack and stick to the old rules. “I mean, it’s fine.”
“I know. This neighbourhood is safer and some of your friends live closer now. As long as you don’t do anything stupid, you’ll be fine.” Sarah smiles at Cassie, discomfort clear in her traits. “Oh, and you get a key for your room.”
Cassie whirls around in her chair, staring at her mother. “Really ?”
“You’re almost an adult.” Sarah purses her lips. “Don’t make me regret it, Cassie.”
Even with the added threat, Cassie grins. She’ll finally be able to lock her room.
“I have a spare in case of an emergency.” Sarah makes sure to burst Cassie’s bubble of happiness.
Cassie frowns. “What counts as an emergency?”
“Danger or accident” Sarah drums on the counter with her fingers. “I want to be able to go in there if you don’t answer.”
“So it doesn’t change anything.” Cassie grumbles under breath, using her hand to hide her mouth. She doesn’t look back to check if her mother heard her complaint.
“That’s all. You can go shower.” Sarah turns on the faucet, the sound of water drowns out her words, Cassie strains to hear her. “Towels and soap are in the bathroom already. You should be able to figure out the knobs on your own.”
“Mmkay.” Cassie doesn’t linger near her mother, she gets up quickly and after pocketing her phone, she rushes to the stairs. She avoids the third step, and almost trips when she reaches the top.
The bathroom is bigger than she thought, a nice counter holds a sink and the shower is large enough that she won’t bump against the walls. She undresses and dumps her clothes in the woven basket in the corner of the room. When she fiddles with the knobs, she quickly figures out how they work and soon enough, steam covers the glass doors of the shower. She steps in, hot water scalding her back and head, she can feel her muscles relax and her eyes fall shut.
She relishes in the feeling, and groans when she remembers she forgot to bring her vanity bag. Cassie quietly cusses at herself in the mirror when she leaves the bathroom, shivering on her way to the door with a towel covering her body. She listens for any sign of her mother being upstairs, and when she can’t hear anything over the pouring water, she runs to her room, rummages through her bag and runs back to the sanctuary of the bathroom.
Cassie washes her hair, and grabs a cloth to lather soap over her limbs. Her conditioner is almost empty, and she remembers her mom saying she’ll buy more the next morning. She’s glad she won’t have to ask for it.
Cassie flicks on the exhaust fan to get rid of the excessive steam covering the shower doors and the mirror, to avoid her mother’s annoyance. Her sleeping clothes are soft against her skin, and she wishes she took the time to make her bed before going down for dinner.
Back in her room, Cassie grabs the fitted sheet and tucks it under her mattress. The white fabric lightens up the room, and when she throws on the flowery duvet cover, her only thought is about sinking in bed and sleeping the day away. She knows she has to unpack at least some stuff tonight, though, so she sits at the edge of her bed and tugs her backpack open.
She goes around the room, opening and closing drawers, slowly filling the space with her belongings. She doesn't hang anything on the walls yet, but there’s a framed picture on her nightstand, and her laptop gets a space on her desk. She gathers some of her school stuff to push them in a drawer at the bottom of her desk, hidden from prying eyes, and her speaker finds its place on the lower shelf on her wall. Just high enough that the sound will be good, but low enough that she doesn’t have to reach up too far.
Right as she’s about to settle back on her bed to finally use her phone, her mother knocks at her door. Another novelty Cassie wasn’t expecting.
“Yeah ?” Her voice holds more than just a question. It carries her confusion.
“Just checking you’re doing okay. I saw you showered, so that’s good.” Sarah quiets down for a moment, but continues. “Can I come in ?”
Cassie sighs, but nods at the door. She sighs again, at herself, this time, and speaks up. “Sorry, yeah, come in.”
Sarah opens the door, glancing inside to see the floor before stepping in. “I expected more of a mess.” She shakes her head. “You’ve already unpacked quite a bit.”
Cassie nods, she has nothing to answer.
“If you need anything, tell me.” Her mother repeats herself. “And I spoke to your school, if you need more time to settle in, you can stay home on Monday.”
She smiles at her daughter, slightly more convincingly than during dinner.
“Thanks. I think I’ll be fine.” Cassie hides the fact she’d very much rather spend the day at school than stuck at home with her mother. “I have two full days.”
Sarah nods and seems to hesitate. “Need anything ?”
Cassie looks around her room. The blank walls jump at her, and she nods at her mother. “Just some stuff to decorate, I guess. Maybe posters.” She rushes her next words. “I can order them online though, don’t worry.”
“If you’re sure.” Sarah follows Cassie's line of sight, at the walls and the scarcely occupied desk and shelves. “I wouldn’t know what to get you, anyway. If I see something I think you’d like, I’ll try to get it.
Cassie glances at her mother, uncertainty clear on both of their faces. “Sure.”
The silence grows louder as seconds go by, and Sarah awkwardly gestures to the door as she turns around. “I’ll head out and leave you to it. Don’t make too many noises, and go to bed at a reasonable time. I’ll probably be asleep before you.”
Cassie raises a brow. Interesting. That means her mother won’t check on her every half hour, and won’t get mad if she’s not in bed by 9pm on the dot. She doesn’t even have a clock in her room. She looks down at her phone, and tucks it under her thigh, away from her mother’s eyes.
“Sure. Good night” Cassie nods at Sarah, anticipating the quiet evening coming her way.
Cassie wants to enjoy this newfound freedom, the lack of pestering from her mother sets her up for a peaceful night. Her body doesn’t seem to agree, her limbs feel like lead and she crawls under her covers, wrapping herself tightly in the new sheets.
She falls asleep easily, even as her thoughts swirl messily in her mind, and no one comes in the middle of the night to make sure she’s not up on her phone. She remembers to plug it in to charge at the last second, eyelids heavy and already half closed as she finds her charger at the bottom of her bag and the conveniently placed plug behind her bedside table. She tiredly makes a note to check for light switches and other plugs in the morning, before slumber takes over and she falls unconscious to the world.