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Summary:

"Something caught against his throat, bittersweet and heavy, a knotted mess of feelings he couldn’t quite put a name to, rising at the sight of his former junior’s face."

or

Kageyama found his place amongst black feathers, Iwaizumi is left to grapple with the notion that maybe the boy never belonged with them at all.

Notes:

Hey folks, it's been a while but I'm finally back with the third and final installment of Tearstained Loyalty.

This one was a ton of work and ended up derailling from my initial thoughts like a lot. Besides that a couple disclaimers: First of all, that one is not very Oikawa friendly, I tried my best to not let my own bias against the character bleed into the writting - I'm unsure if I managed that, I wanted him to read as a dumb, antagonistic teen (I hope he didn't come across as cartoonish evil, but if he's your fave I do recomend you read carefully as it may not be for you).

Anyway hope you guys enjoy this one, I'm very happy with the overall result and I can't wait to hear your thoughts!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Hajime knew it was a bad idea to let Tooru seek out Karasuno's team, not that there was much he could do to avoid it – short of tackling his troublesome childhood friend to the ground, dignity be damned.

Still when his brain registered the first tells of the other’s alertness it was already too late: There stood Tooru in the height of his stupidity, posturing towards their former junior while completely clueless to the way the younger’s companions tensed at his sudden arrival.

Contending himself in playing peacekeeper before his friend managed to make a scene, Hajime started walking towards where the other stood, trying to smolder his annoyance into something more manageable for the time being.

Kageyama stood between two of his teammates: the tall blond blocker and the team's ace.

He didn't know much about either of them (and it bothered him, for reasons he couldn’t quite place).

Glasses was a first-year, if his memory served him well, a solid player even if not extraordinary; with a silver tongue that seemed prone to lash at opponents and teammates in equal measure – not all that fond of the setter from what Hajime remembered (and yet the way he stood shoulder to shoulder with Kageyama spoke of some sort of camaraderie).

Azumane (that’s what their ace was called, wasn’t it ? He could vaguely recall him as a player from another team back in middle school, he hadn’t been that taller than his teammates, back them) had a strong presence inside the court, with powerful spikes and a overall roundedness that seemed to be common to all of Karasuno’s third years - funnily enough, the only thing keeping the other from completely fading into the background outside matches seemed to be his height and overall looks.

Quiet politeness and a slightly hunched over posture, that was what stuck with Hajime when it came to Karasuno’s number 3 – although most of the time he saw him by the other third years, instead of trailing after stray underclassmen.

“Tobio-chan, am I seeing things or are you playing nice with your teammates ?”

Tooru’s voice had that honeyed tone he took whenever he decided to taunt someone, he found himself picking up his pace a little, better intervene before things got out of hand (he fervently prayed the rumors about Karasuno’s ace were fake, least thing he needed was his friend picking a fight with an actual delinquent).

“Playing nice ?” Kageyama blinked, head tilted to his left.

Azumane placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder, fingers almost brushing against jet black hair with the motion.

Hajime expected the setter to shrug the older off, or at the very least, frown or something, but the boy didn’t seem bothered by the touch in the slightless (something nagged at the back of his head at the sight, he didn’t have the time to ponder on it, he had a friend to keep in line).

Glasses narrowed his eyes from his place at Kageyama’s right, the beginnings of a sneer forming on his face.

Tooru’s resulting chuckle had a certain sharpness to it, knowing his captain (and did he know him, for better or worse, like the back of his hand) the lack of reaction got under his skin.

“Then again, I doubt you’d even know how to start doing so…”

“Oikawa” he found himself bitting out almost at the same time as Karasuno’s blocker (he really needed to get around to knowing the boy’s name) scoffed.

He heard Tooru’s answering whine of ‘Iwa-chan’ at the same time Kageyama called a quiet ‘Iwaizumi-san’, he nodded at the boy in greeting although he couldn’t help but wonder what had his companions so tense (glasses’ eyes sharpened into something that bordered on a glare as they settled on Hajime, had he offended the blond somehow ?).

“I’m sorry, but can we help you with something ?” Azumane was surprisingly soft spoken outside the court, voice barely rising above a murmur.

The ace gave a small step towards them, hand dropping from the first-year’s shoulder as he stood somewhat in front of both first years; his hair, still down for the time being (it was longer than Hajime first thought) hung into loose curls, obscuring most of his face.

He cut an intimidating figure, almost looming over them.

Tooru smiled up at the other, completely unbothered, something in his face leaning into amusement more than anything else.

“Heard Karasuno got into an incident with another school, seems the king got himself quite a guard dog – better learn how to play nice quickly Tobio, before it decides to snap at the hand who feeds it…”

The reaction was immediate.

Azumane went stiff as a board, face still obscured as his shoulders climbed up to his ears (and that’s it, part of him thought. He was about to see his best friend get plummeted into jelly because he was dumb enough to provoke the one guy rumored to have a criminal record in high school).

However the ace wasn’t the one to spring into action.

It was Kageyama, who stepped from behind his senior glowering, face set into something fierce and incredibly angry.

“You take that about Azumane-san back right now!”

His voice cracked like a whip, Hajime couldn’t recall ever seeing the younger like that, the boy was furious.

Besides him Tooru took half a step back, something startled crossing his face, before he narrowed his eyes at the display (he could see the cogs turning inside his friend's head, already thinking on how to exploit that new found vulnerability, no doubt).

Hajime opened his mouth, a sharp rebuke taking shape as he reached towards the back of his captain's shirt, intent on dragging him back towards their own team before he managed to make an even bigger ass out of himself.

He never got the chance.

A new voice cut the air, Karasuno's blocker stared them down, eyes hardened into a knife edge.

“Don’t use your metric to measure our upperclassmen, it's insulting.”

“Tsukishima!” (so that was his name) Came the ace's voice – he sounded mortified as he reached for both underclassmen, keeping them in place with surprisingly loose holds.

“Azumane-senpai would never!” Came Kageyama's indignant hiss of an addendum.

Tsukishima (matching a name to the face made things infinitely easier) gave a single grave nod, looking just as incensed as the seething setter.

“I'm fine you two, there's no need for that.”

Hajime could barely hear Azumane (apparently soft spoken was his default setting) – he could, however, see how both boys reacted at his murmured assurance.

The blocker gently twisted his wrist out of the ace's grasp (if you could even call it that), pressing his fingertips to the back of the older’s hand in a lingering touch, muttering something sounding suspiciously like ‘liar’ under his breath.

Kageyama took a step away from them and back towards his senior, apparently mollified for the time being, although he kept a wary eye on Tooru the whole time.

And Tooru (heavens above Tooru, who didn’t know when to back down, who kept dragging him along to his messes and who Hajime never learned quite how to say no to) took a step forward almost at the same time; smile stretched a little too tight, a little too sharp.

“My my, there’s no need for such hostility, one would think I’m accusing Azumane here of being a criminal – I’m just giving advice on how to get along with your new senpai. Tobio-chan is like you don’t know me at all!”

Tooru kept his momentum, striding forward until he could sling an arm over the unsuspecting ace's shoulders – Azumane lurched forward slightly at the sudden weight, but other than that stayed perfectly still under the sudden touch (maybe too still, frozen in place almost, even when Tooru glued their cheeks together to grin at the rest of them).

“Oikawa cut it off, you’re embarrassing yourself at this point.” Hajime all but bit off the words, glaring at his friend (who probably sensed he was this close to whacking him upside the head) now way out of reach and half perched on their rival team’s player.

“No sense! We’re just having a friendly conversation Iwa-chan, plus what kind of senpai would I be if I didn’t warn Tobio here of the dangers of not changing his ways ?”

Azumane (apparently over his sudden bout of frozeness) cringed away from Tooru as far as he could given the awkward position the setter was keeping them in, hands coming up try and pry the arm slung around his neck with little success as the other kept talking – cluelessly (or knowing Hajime’s friend, intentionally) dragging the other player along as he gesticulated this and that way.

Something crossed Azumane’s face, his expression suddenly looking a whole lot more closed off as Hajime caught a glimpse of a squinted eye peeking through a curtain of brown hair.

“Oikawa, let him go.” He found himself hissing urgently – Karasuno’s blocker echoing his words with way more venom.

The ace planted his feet on the ground.

Tooru made as if to give another step, only to be pulled back as his unwilling passenger stood straighter.

“I think you need to reevaluate your image of Kageyama-kun, he’s been putting a lot of effort into being a good teammate and I, for one, am very proud of him” Oikawa gawked at Azumane who, strangely enough, seemed to shrink a little at the attention before taking a deep breath and continuing in a softer tone “And I’m sure his current upperclassmen share the sentiment.”

Hajime risked a glance at Kageyama’s direction, the younger setter had his eyes locked on the ace, looking at the older as if he had just hung the moon and stars (something caught against his throat, bittersweet and heavy, a knotted mess of feelings he couldn’t quite put a name to, rising at the sight of his former junior’s face).

Tooru smiled, letting his arm (finally) fall back at his side with a theatrical huff, eyes fleeting back to Kageyama for a brief moment.

“Is that so ? Very well then, I will leave you to it – but remember Tobio, even the tamest dog can bite if stepped on one too many times…” there he turned back to Azumane, something in his smile taking a sharper, mocking edge “But you’re as loyal as they come, huh Azumane ? A tame dog indeed.” A hand came up to pat against the ace’s face, fingers curling inward as if to pinch or grab at a cheek.

Several things happened at the same time:

Hajime grabbed at the back of Tooru’s shirt, dragging him back and away from the other with slightly more force than intended – it sent them both stumbling backwards.

“Don’t you know when to stop ?” He found himself hissing with a shake to his friend’s form.

Tsukishima took a step forward, one hand coming to rest at the ace’s forearm, face contorted into a furious scowl.

Azumane flinched, full-bodied, recoiling as if struck – eyes wide and pale faced.

Kageyama leaped forward, more or less standing in between his teammates and Tooru, voice booming inside the small hallway just skirting the edge of a yell.

“Stop that!”

Absolute silence, the younger setter stood there panting, arms outstretched by his sides as if blocking the way towards his two companions.

“I may not understand them all that well, and sometimes they do stuff I find weird or, or I don’t know – different ? But that’s not the point, the point is they’re good!”

He punctuated the point with a sharp wave towards his teammates, sucking a deep breath before driving right back into his rant, whole body brimming with a maniac kind of energy Hajime didn’t know what to make of.

“They’re good and kind and all the things I’m not, even when I don’t deserve it. Hell, even Tsukishima – and he’s kinda of an asshole most of the time; he’s good, he’s so good I don’t know what to make with it, with any of them!”

At this point Kageyama’s voice did some sort of weird little warble as his words started jumbling together from the speed at which he was spitting them out.

“So just stop, I know that I wasn't a good teammate, I'm probably not all that better now most of the time, but they are! So you don't get to come around and mock, or belittle or insult them, any of them.”

At this point Kageyama’s eyes were like twin gems, shining under a glossy film of moisture gathering along his bottom lashes (Hajime feet himself avoiding the boy's unblinking stare, something that felt dangerously like shame curling inside his gut).

“And above all, you don't get to come along and try to convince me they're things they're not – I trust my teammates, you don't get to take that from me.”

Another deep breath, Hajime felt like the air inside that cramped hallway was suddenly too thin, too charged.

“I know they're patient and that they're willing to hear me out, even when what I say comes out all wrong; And I also know, without a shade of doubt, that none of my current senpai would ever try to hit me over asking them to teach me a serve.”

Azumane sucked a breath, face impossibly pale under his long hair, the look he threw Hajime's direction held more accusation than he knew what to do with (a look he gave himself one too many times, when he wondered how much good he did Tooru, how many times he toed the line between friend and enabler) – besides the ace Tsukishima mouthed the words ‘a serve’ with wide, furious eyes.

Tooru barked out a laugh at that, meaner than what he usually allowed himself.

“So that’s what all of that is about ? Little Tobio telling tales about how mean his former senpai were ? Maybe Iwaizumi should’ve let me hit you, then you’d actually have something to tell, huh?”

Hajime felt like a bucket of ice was dropped over his head; his mind registered Tooru taking a step forward at the same time Azumane shot towards Kageyama as if it all was happening far, far away.

“If you want to get to him you'll have to go through me first.” For the first time since it all began, the ace raised his voice – there was a certain shakiness to it, but it still rang inside the hall's bare walls with enough force to demand everyone’s attention.

Azumane stood to his full height (he moved in between the two setters so quickly it took a few confused seconds for Hajime to spot Kageyama behind him), one arm held back as if to keep the younger boy where he was.

Tooru made as if to give another step towards the pair – Hajime acted before the thought fully formed inside his mind.

“Iwa-chan!” Tooru’s voice actually raised into a startled yell.

Hajime’s hand stung something fierce from the force with which it cracked onto the back of his friend's head.

He remembers headbutting him, all the way back in middle school, recalls the blood gushing from his nose and the advice he yelled himself hoarse to give (he wonders once again if they're good for each other, it doesn't really matter, he supposes – right now the only way out is forward, he'll do what it takes, he can discover how to live with the consequences later).

“What the fuck is wrong with you ?” He shoots back, because someone needs to call Tooru out on his bullshit and he rather it be him than someone else (and that, he supposes, is the thing when it comes to them).

He sees Azumane flinching from the corner of his eye, sees the way Kageyama circles an arm around the older’s waist and pulls him back, how they cling to one another at the sudden clap of skin meeting skin – he dutifully doesn’t think about any of it and how it makes him feel (not until way later when he’d recall how fucking terrified Azumane had looked and how, despite that, he had stood still as a boulder in front of Kageyama, holding the setter behind himself with single-minded desperation – the memory will be enough to have him struggling to swallow past the knot at the back of his throat).

And then, coming from somewhere deeper inside the building a new voice – clipped and slightly monotone.

“What is happening here ?”

Karasuno’s manager walks towards them unhurriedly, face set in stone.

She stops closer to her team members, eyes assessing the whole scene before they set somewhere not quite on Hajime’s face.

“Well ?” Her tone remains the same, her eyes kind of remind him of Kageyama’s in a way (they’re the same shade of blue, he realizes later on, and they both make one feel pinned in place).

“Shimizu-san, right ? Nothing much really, we were just chatting and things got a little heated, nothing worth worrying yourself over.” Tooru gave her a smile, tone back to something closer to what he usually displayed.

The girl stared, she didn’t smile back.

Tsukishima scoffed.

Hajime reminded himself that slapping Tooru didn’t solve his problems the first time and definitely wouldn’t solve them a second one.

The manager glanced at where Azumane stood, still shielding (albeit way less tensely now) Kageyama, before briefly turning her attention back to Hajime.

“Do I need to contact either sensei or coach Ukai ?”

He had a feeling the question wasn’t directed at him, despite feeling the girl’s gaze like a heavy, tangible weight – his eyes found their way back to Kageyama; the setter stared back at him, a slight frown on his face, one hand fisted on Azumane’s shirt (he couldn’t recall the boy ever being quite so tactile, but the sight made something in his chest sit just a little less heavily).

“We clearly overstepped and made your teammates uncomfortable, whatever you decide we won’t cause any more trouble.” He found himself saying, before setting into a respectful bow.

Besides him, Tooru floundered for a few brief moments before coming to the conclusion that it wasn’t the time to be an antagonistic ass and bowed as well (he pretended he didn’t hear the indignant grumbling muttered through clenched teeth, after his little stunt maybe a bruised ego would do him some amount of good).

“Shimizu-senpai, I think they understood it, we should get back to others.” Kageyama’s voice sounded closer than before, Hajime spotted him next to the manager once he stood straight.

The girl nodded before giving them a brisk, shallow bow and marching back from where she came from.

One by one the Karasuno’s players followed after her – first Kageyama, who hesitated for a few seconds before giving an awkward nod and leaving; soon after was Azumane, who gave a slight bow in their direction before retreating towards the others.

The blocker lingered, golden eyes boring into them with an intensity that had Hajime on edge.

Tsukishima gave a single, measured step towards them and smiled the same way a wolf bared its fangs.

“You think of laying a single finger on any of my teammates ever again and I’ll make sure everyone knows who you really are behind that smile, great king.”

The blond was gone before any of them could think to retort, a teasing lilt to his voice as he addressed his teammates that had nothing of the bite he just regarded them with.

Besides him Tooru seethed silently, he could practically taste the vitriol churning inside his friend’s mind, just waiting to be spewed.

Hajime sighed (Tooru was a mess, but so was he and he wasn’t about to let him spiral into whatever destructive rabbit hole his brain managed to dig in the meantime).

“Hey, stop that.” He admonished with an elbow to the side (slightly gentler than he otherwise would, there was something about the whole encounter with Karasuno that still weighed at the back of his mind).

“Stop what ?”

“Listening to whatever dumb, machiavellian revenge plan your brain is cooking up right now.”

He let the resulting grumbling wash over him like rain, whatever energy Tooru didn’t spend in hissing hatefully at the walls would go to the match (way better than whatever that trainwreck of a confrontation with Kageyama had been).

He could just make out Karasuno’s players at the corner of his eye – Tsukishima bumped shoulders with the black haired setter, Azumane gave the pair a small smile before ruffling their hair.

“Besides” Hajime mused, a bittersweet smile tugging at his lips despite himself “Kageyama being Karasuno’s is a good thing.”

He couldn’t quite catch what his friend muttered in response but he had the distinct impression it wasn’t anything charitable.

From the distance he could just make out the curve of their former junior’s smile as he talked with one upperclassman or another, Hajime’s heart felt tight, he couldn’t recall ever seeing that one – but something inside him was glad for witnessing it as it were, despite it all.

Notes:

Thank you so very much for being by my side until here! In case you want to yell at me about ficcional people or see pretty art I'm on tumblr as conspirartist!

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