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Megumi can’t speak.
Somehow this is the worst thing. He’s immersed in many other feelings – his body moving against his will, his technique being wrenched from him, his fist in Itadori’s gut – but the most painful is how he tries to say something (run, or help, maybe) but all that comes out is a laugh that isn’t his.
He watches himself hurt Maki, hurt Kurusu, hurt Itadori, again and again until he gasps awake and lurches off the bed in a tumble of limbs and blankets.
His dorm is unchanged since before everything happened. He takes in the familiar walls, the books piled on every surface, the clock glowing 3:48 on the bedside table.
It was a dream, but he still can’t catch his breath. He frantically pulls his sleeves up, wrenches his collar to the side. There are no marks on his shoulders, no tattoos circling his wrists. Sukuna is gone, and he’s awake but he still can’t speak –
This time he doesn’t have to. There’s a soft knock at his door, and a quiet voice saying “Fushiguro?” and even when he doesn’t respond, the door gently opens just enough for Itadori to look in.
He surely can’t make out much in the darkness, but he must see the pitiful lump on the floor that is Megumi.
“Fushiguro,” he says again, and now he sounds properly worried.
Megumi tries to catch his breath enough to respond, but there’s a hand around his throat, harsh laughter in his ears.
Itadori carefully closes the door behind him and crosses the room in a few quick strides. Once upon a time he might have hesitated, might have stammered or stepped uncertainly, but now he just flips on the bedside lamp and sits in front of Megumi on the floor, his eyes concerned but not judgmental or even surprised. They’ve all been through this since Shibuya, since…
“Can I touch you?”
Megumi nods, trying to think of something else, anything else.
Itadori takes his hand and brings it to his chest, letting Megumi feel the rise and fall as he breathes steadily. They’ve done this before, too.
It takes a minute for Megumi’s stuttering breaths to slow into something that makes him feel less lightheaded. “Itadori,” he gasps finally.
“Hey,” Itadori smiles. “I’m here.”
After another minute, Megumi finally pulls his hand away and slumps back against his mattress. Itadori scoots over to sit beside him.
“Nightmare?” he asks, and Megumi nods. Itadori is silent for a moment and then hesitantly says, “About him?”
“Yeah.”
And there’s that look again, the guilt in his eyes that’s been present ever since Megumi came back. Maybe since Shibuya, really, but it’s gotten worse, or he’s gotten worse at hiding it.
Itadori starts to say, “I’m —”
“Don’t apologize. It wasn’t your fault.” Itadori won’t meet his eyes, so Megumi insists, “Itadori. It wasn’t your fault.”
“I still wish I could take it all from you,” Itadori whispers, and Megumi has nothing to say to that, so instead he drops his head onto Itadori’s shoulder. Itadori tenses at the unusual show of closeness, but Megumi just closes his eyes and breathes.
Itadori lets him, for a few minutes. Then he says quietly, “Fushiguro?”
“Hmm?”
“Do you want to go back to bed?”
Megumi doesn’t move away, but his whole body freezes in something close to panic. The thought of being alone in this room again makes his skin crawl. He tries to find the words and the courage to say so, but Itadori reads him like a book as usual.
“Would it help if I stayed?”
Megumi nods, and Itadori gently helps him to his feet. Megumi drags the blankets back onto the bed and climbs under them. Itadori flicks off the lamp and joins him. He leaves a respectful space between them, but Megumi crosses it immediately, cuddling up to Itadori and closing his eyes. Normally acting like this would embarrass him, but he’s too tired to care. If Itadori is next to him, then he knows he’s safe.
For a moment, Itadori seems to be holding his breath, but then Megumi feels his fingers running softly and tentatively through his hair.
He sighs contentedly, already feeling sleep pulling him down. “G’night, Yuuji,” he murmurs.
The hand on his head pauses, then starts up again. Itadori whispers, “Good night, Megumi.”