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(source: https://x.com/_Kipke/status/1768409205025747024)
Part 1: The first mistake
Gohan stepped into Capsule Corp, immediately met by the lively chaos of Bulma and Chi-Chi bustling around the front hall—slipping on coats, heels, and the finishing touches of lipstick. The two women were so engrossed in their preparations that they didn’t even notice him enter. They looked dressed to the nines, exuding the excitement that only comes with the promise of a great night out.
“I see you’ve really dolled yourself up, Mom,” Gohan said as he walked further into the hallway.
“Gohan!” Chi-Chi called, turning to greet her son with a warm smile. “I’m so glad you’re here, honey!”
Bulma added with a wink, “You’re our hero tonight, Gohan! I’m so dying to get away from everything tonight!”
Yesterday, on the phone, Chi-Chi had vented about the endless chore of “slaving away in the kitchen for three Saiyans,” while Bulma bemoaned being stuck staring at “nothing but the four sterile walls of her lab.” It was clear they both needed a break, which was exactly why Gohan had stepped up tonight to give them a chance to escape.
Trailing behind them, however, were Vegeta and Goku, looking like prisoners marching to their doom.
“Such a waste of good training hours,” Vegeta grumbled, arms tightly crossed, his scowl deeper than usual, while Goku scratched the back of his neck, already tugging at the stiff collar of the button-up shirt Chi-Chi had forced him into.
As Bulma fastened her earrings, ostentatiously ignoring her husband’s grumpiness, she cast Gohan a knowing smirk. “Good luck with those two,” she said, referring to Trunks and Goten, the two little troublemakers he’d be babysitting tonight and hadn’t shown their faces yet. “Last week, they turned the lab into a jelly disaster zone. It was everywhere. I mean, it was pouring out of the windows!”
Chi-Chi adjusted her necklace with a scowl in the hallway mirror, chiming in, “And somehow, on the same day, my kitchen ended up flooded with foam! I’m still finding bubbles in the toaster!”
Goku, grinning sheepishly, tried to lighten the mood. “Aw, c’mon, Chi-Chi. The kids are just being kids! You remember when Gohan accidentally blew up the rice cooker that one time, don’t you?”
“That was science,” Gohan interjected quickly, holding up a finger as if to defend his childhood honor. “It was an experiment. And I was five.”
Vegeta, however, had no patience for the nostalgia. “Hmph. If either of those brats damages the gravity chamber again, I’m throwing them both in there on max settings and locking the door.”
“Send them to bed early, Gohan, before Vegeta comes home to ‘discipline’ our children and I have to hire an entire army of trauma therapists again,” Bulma snapped, only half-joking, shooting her husband a glare sharp enough to cut through steel.
Sending them to bed early seemed like a great idea to Gohan. He still had to study for his upcoming exams, and it could give him a chance to squeeze in a video call with Videl…
As the four parents headed for the door, Gohan barely caught half of Vegeta’s muttered remark about "character building" — why did everything The Prince said always sounded like a threat?
Gohan forced a smile. Despite the warnings, he felt supremely confident in his babysitting skills, giving them a dramatic salute. "Don't worry, I've got everything under control!"
Famous last words.
As the door clicked shut behind the adults, Trunks and Goten emerged from their hiding spots, already exchanging knowing grins. Gohan raised an eyebrow, suddenly suspicious.
“What are you two up to?” he asked, crossing his arms.
“Nothing!” they said in unison, their voices dripping with faux innocence.
Gohan narrowed his eyes but decided not to press further.
Mistake number one.
Part 2. Incriminating folder
A few minutes later, the living room had been transformed into what could only be described as a kid’s version of a spy movie. The coffee table was now called the ‘negotiation table’, complete with a toy briefcase, a stack of mysterious papers, and two pint-sized schemers wearing sunglasses way too large for their little faces. Goten and Trunks sat on opposite sides of the table, their expressions dead serious as they gestured for Gohan to take the ‘hot seat.’
“What… is this?” Gohan asked, confused but already bracing for trouble, his rock-solid babysitting confidence wavering.
“We have some important business to discuss,” Trunks said, his voice low and formal, like a tiny lawyer in training.
Gohan sighed but humored them, sitting down across from the two. “Alright, let’s hear it.”
Goten reached for a folder labeled ‘TOP SEKRET’ in the little plastic briefcase and slid it across the table with exaggerated drama. “This might interest you, big brother…”
Curious, Gohan opened the folder—and immediately wished he hadn’t. Inside were poorly printed photos of him kissing his girlfriend. The angle and lighting were terrible, but there was no mistaking what was happening in the picture. Gohan and Videl were tangled in a deep liplock, so intense it looked like they were trying to suck each other’s faces off.
His jaw dropped. “How did you—when did you—?!”
“Doesn’t matter,” Trunks interrupted smoothly, adjusting his sunglasses. He opened the toy briefcase with a click, pulling out a single sheet of paper covered in crayon scribbles that was supposed to resemble a legal document. “What matters is our terms.”
Gohan blinked. “Your terms?”
“Yes,” Trunks continued, pressing his fingers together like a seasoned negotiator. “My clients”—he gestured to himself and Goten—demand ‘unlimited gaming privileges’ and no bedtime tonight. Failure to comply will result in these photos being shown to certain individuals.”
Goten grinned triumphantly. “Our moms will get the first copy!”
Gohan’s face turned several shades of red. “You wouldn’t dare!” He shuddered at the thought of what his very traditional mother would think. He could already picture the frying pan hovering ominously in the air, ready to strike.
“Oh, we would,” Trunks said, leaning back in his chair, trying to emulate a mob boss. “The evidence speaks for itself.”
“C’mon, Gohan,” Goten added, trying to suppress his laughter. “Do you really want Mom seeing this?”
Gohan groaned, rubbing his temples as he tried to think of a way out of this mess. “Look, how about we make a deal? You get an extra hour of video games, but then it’s bedtime.”
Trunks shook his head, tisking like a disappointed parent. “That’s not how this works. We hold all the cards, Gohan”
Gohan’s frustration mounted as the boys giggled, the oversized sunglasses slipping down their noses. He had underestimated them.
“Fine,” Gohan said through gritted teeth. “But don’t think I’m letting you two off easy. There will be consequences later.”
“Sure, sure,” Trunks said dismissively, already grabbing his controller. “But for tonight? We’re calling the shots.”
Gohan watched the little boys settle into the couch, turning on a racing game at full volume, wondering how they'd managed to outmaneuver him. Sinking deeper into his chair, Gohan dreaded what else the night might have in store.
Part 3: Gohan’s Counterplan
The private theater at Capsule Corp was anything but peaceful. The enormous screen flickered with the action-packed chaos of a vintage Jackie Chan movie, but the real action was happening off-screen. Trunks and Goten had fully embraced their roles as Martial Arts menaces—complete with dramatic sound effects and mid-air kicks. Unfortunately, their moves were less graceful than Jackie Chan’s, and several innocent chairs had already met their untimely demise.
“Hi-yah!” Goten shouted, flying-kicking over a chair and landing with a thud that shook the floor.
"Take this!" Trunks yelled back, pretending to block an invisible enemy before accidentally sending one of Bulma's decorative pillows flying into the popcorn machine, which toppled over. The glass shattered dramatically on the marble floor, sending popcorn rolling everywhere.
In the midst of their chaos, Gohan sat cross-legged with his laptop, glaring at the screen as he scrolled through old family photos of the boys. His plan was simple: find something so humiliating, so utterly cringeworthy, that it would put their blackmail scheme to shame.
“Come on… there’s gotta be something,” Gohan muttered desperately, clicking through a slideshow of Capsule Corp barbecues and awkward school photos.
He paused at a picture of three-year-old Goten with his head stuck in the stair railings, trying to spy on the adults after bedtime. “Not bad.”
Next, he found one of Trunks’ mid-sneeze during a formal Capsule Corp event, juice spraying everywhere, including on the little tux he was wearing. Gohan chuckled. “Getting warmer.”
Next were a few photos of Trunks tangled up in his father’s spandex suit with a visibly seething Vegeta in the background, and Goten wearing his mom's dress and heels, caught playing ‘Chi-Chi’. But as Gohan stared at the screen, he realized these moments weren’t nearly embarrassing enough. Trunks and Goten were shameless. This wouldn’t faze them.
Then it hit him. An evil grin spread across his face as he perked up. “Oh, I know exactly what to do.” He pulled his phone from his pocket and began typing a message.
Part 4. Revenge
As Gohan went to put his counterplan into action, a weird, mechanical sound was heard in the hallway. Gohan whipped his head around when the vibration of a ki-blast followed by what sounded like one of Bulma’s cleaning bots crashing into a wall.
"Uh-oh," the boys said in unison, suddenly frozen mid-kick. But their guilty feelings didn’t stop them from causing more chaos. When Gohan found them, the boys were in the middle of battling a bot, which now resembled a spinning death trap. The casing was torn half off, and the exposed cables sparked with electricity as it helplessly spun in circles like a broken record. Trunks was hurling coasters at the poor thing like they were ninja stars, while Goten valiantly swung a broomstick in its general direction, pretending to wield his father’s red Power Pole.
"Stand back! I've got this!" Trunks announced, right before the bot grabbed onto the broomstick in its pincers and squished it into two.
Watching this, Gohan groaned "Seriously?!" while pinching the bridge of his nose.
Before he could intervene, he was startled by his butt, erupting into a ringtone. He pulled his phone from his back pocket and answered the video call. His beautiful Videl appeared on the screen, and the sight of her made him smile uncontrollably.
“Hey Videl, you have to see the hellscape I’ve gotten into…” Gohan rotated the camera, showing her the two fighting rascals and the mayhem they had left in their wake. There was a bot-shaped hole in the wall, with metal shrapnel scattered everywhere.
“Hey, boys!” she called cheerfully, completely unfazed by the destruction “I see you’re having fun!”
Hearing Videl’s voice, Trunks and Goten froze, dropping their makeshift weapons. Their earlier endeavors evaporated instantly as they scrambled to greet her, both talking over each other.
“Did you see my ninja moves?” Trunks asked, puffing out his chest. “Are you coming over with snacks like last time?”
“Ninja moves? Please. Check this out!” Goten declared, breaking into an awkward dance, resembling the moves of a flapping inflatable tube man and an angry chicken.
Gohan stared, bewildered, as the two boys fell over themselves trying to impress her.
Videl laughed. “You guys are just too much. Gohan, oh! Are these the photos you were worried about?”
Gohan froze as she send him a file, showing the very same pictures the boys had been using as leverage.
“Wait… how did you—?”
“Oh, Bulma sent them to me,” she said casually, scrolling through the photos. “She thinks we’re adorable.”
Gohan turned beet red. “She what?”
“Yeah, she texted me earlier. Don’t worry, she won’t show Chi-Chi or anything.” She smiled, completely unbothered. “You’re off the hook.”
Meanwhile, Trunks and Goten stood dumbfounded, their blackmail plan crumbling before their eyes.
“Wait… you mean we did all that for nothing?” Trunks groaned.
“And we broke a bot!” Goten added, with rising alarm in his voice.
Gohan crossed his arms, sporting a self-satisfied smirk. “Looks like the tables have turned, huh?”
The boys exchanged a sheepish glance before slinking off to the couch, defeated, but just before sitting down, Goten turned around.
“Wait, we still haven’t told mom!”
Gohan gritted his teeth. He knew Trunks was clever enough to scheme something like this, but his little brother had been the real surprise.
“Don’t be too hard on them,” Videl laughed through the screen. “They’re just doing stupid kid stuff.”
Gohan sighed. “Fine. But they’re cleaning up the mess in an hour.”
Part 5: the call
By the time evening rolled around and Trunks and Goten’s anarchy energy had begun to fade, Gohan finally felt like he could breathe again. Goten and Trunks were now quietly sitting in front of the TV in the livingroom, watching an old children’s show after Gohan had drilled them into cleaning up everything they had destroyed.
It had been a frustrating process—at one point requiring him to transform into Super Saiyan Two—but it had successfully drained the boys of their pent-up energy. After wiping down a few more surfaces with a cloth to get the last popcorn crumbs, Gohan settled on the couch, savoring a rare moment of peace—until his phone buzzed on the table.
He glanced at the screen and saw that Bulma had finally read his earlier SOS text about the boys' antics, and as he expected, she'd handled it in her own way. Apparently, that included showing everything to Vegeta.
Seconds later, the Capsule Corp TV lit up with an incoming video call.
“Dad’s calling!” Trunks yelped, panic flooding his face.
Before Goten could react, Trunks scrambled to answer the call, smacking a chocolate-smeared hand on the remote. Vegeta’s stern face appeared on the enormous screen, his usual scowl in full force.
“What are you up to, boy?” Vegeta demanded, his deep voice reverberating through the speakers.
Trunks froze like a deer in headlights. “Uh… nothing, Dad! Just… you know. Well-behaving!”
From his spot on the couch, Goten muttered, “Totally not blackmailing Gohan!” As soon as the words left his mouth, he slapped both hands over it, his eyes widening in horror.
“What was that?” Vegeta’s eyes narrowed like a predator zeroing in on his prey.
Trunks stammered, “N-nothing! He meant… um, not blackmailing! Like, definitely not doing that!”
Vegeta’s brow twitched, and for a moment, Gohan thought he was about to explode through the screen. But instead, Vegeta straightened his posture with an air of authority.
“You two little rascals disgrace the Saiyan name with such underhanded tactics,” Vegeta said, his tone deadly serious. “Saiyans rely on their strength, their pride, and their ability to crush their enemies with honor!”
Trunks and Goten stood stock-still, nodding furiously like obedient soldiers under a drill sergeant’s scrutiny.
“And yet…” Vegeta’s scowl softened into something suspiciously close to a smirk. “…if it works, send me the photos. I could make use of them someday.” Vegeta gave one last wicked grin before the call abruptly ended. The screen went dark, leaving Gohan in a mix of exasperation and disbelief.
Gohan groaned audibly, burying his face in his hands. “You’ve got to be kidding me.’ He glared at the boys, who were now high-fiving each other and basking in their supposed victory. “You realize you’re about to be sent to bed, right?”
“Worth it,” Goten snickered, earning another frustrated groan from Gohan.
The little pests had won this round, but he was determined not to lose the war.
Part 6: Later That Night
The house was finally quiet. Trunks and Goten were passed out in Trunks’ bedroom, sprawled out on the bed with controllers still clutched in their hands. Goten snored softly, drool pooling on his pillow, while Trunks lay nearby, a ring of crushed Smartie crumbs framing his mouth.
After Gohan had spent another hour drilling them to scrub the floors—after all, they had wrecked the cleaning bot that usually did the job—they eventually begged to go to bed. And this was just the beginning. Now, the best part of his revenge could finally begin to unfold.
Gohan quietly stepped into the room, holding a small, Polaroid camera. He aimed it at the two sleeping troublemakers, the soft click and whir of the camera capturing the moment perfectly.
Admiring the freshly printed photo, Gohan grinned to himself. “Revenge is sweet”. He gave the picture a quick wave to help it dry before sliding it into his back pocket.
He tucked the boys in a little extra snug, pulling the blankets over them with surprising tenderness despite their antics. Before leaving, he stuck a note on the door, scrawled in his neat handwriting:
"Enjoy your rest while it lasts, boys. Payback’s coming when you least expect it. - Big Bro."
Satisfied, Gohan flicked off the light and quietly shut the door behind him.
In their sleep, the boys shifted, completely unaware of the new blackmail material now safely tucked into Gohan’s pocket.