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Neil Perry has added Charlie Dalton, Todd Anderson, Steven Meeks, Knox Overstreet, Gerard Pitts and Richard Cameron to group chat “O CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN”
Neil: Hello! This is the group chat for Mr Keating's AP English class! I thought since there’s so few of us it would be nice to have a groupchat!
Charlie: oh god, im friends with a bunch of nerds
Cameron: You’re in AP English too
Charlie: not the point
Knox: im too cool for this
Charlie: if im stuck in this then you are too knoxious
Todd: What will we use the groupchat for?
Neil: Hi Todd! I figured we could use it to ask each other questions about assignments and such, and just to become better friends!
Charlie: yeah, dont be so scared of new people todd. we dont bite
Meeks: yes you do
Charlie: okay, only i bite
Todd: …Does he actually bite?
Meeks: only me
Pitts: we don’t get homework already, right?
Neil: Not yet!
Pitts: great, I’ll be back when we do
Neil: Wait! I was thinking, since some of us are still new, that we could do names and pronouns! My names Neil, he/it pronouns!
Charlie: charlie, he/she, gender is a construct
Knox: Knox, he/him
Meeks: Steven Meeks, or just Meeks, and xe/xem
Pitts: just call me Pitts, pronouns are he/him
Todd: I have a question. I don’t want to sound mean but how do you pronounce and use xe/xem pronouns?
Meeks: oo! Teaching time! Xe (zay) gets used in the same manner as they or he. Xem (zem) gets used in the same manner as them or him. And then there is also Xeir (zay-r) which is used like their or his. So, an example would be “xe went to grab xeir lunch, you won’t want to see xem when xeir hungry”
Todd: Interesting! Thank you!
Meeks: anytime!
Todd: My names Todd, and I guess my pronouns are he/him?
Charlie: you guess? Todd: I’ve never really thought about it before. Sorry
Neil: No need to apologize! A lot of people don’t think about their pronouns. The first time I asked Knox his, he went, and I quote “the fuck are pronouns?”
Meeks: he wasn’t always an ap kind of student Neil: But we’ve taught him things and he’s been a lot better!
Knox: i like to think im the best one here
Charlie: careful, youre starting to sound like me
Knox: youre not the only one who thinks theyre the best
Charlie: true, but im the only one thats right
Pitts: can you stop with the flirting?
Charlie: never!!! Knox: thats flirting?
PRIVATE CHAT: Todd Anderson and Neil Perry
Todd: Are Knox and Charlie actually flirting?
Neil: None of us actually know. Charlie flirts with everyone, although she won’t flirt with you if you aren’t okay with it, she has boundaries. And Knox is, well, probably straight?
Todd: Probably?
Neil: We’re not too sure. He’s never said anything but we have thoughts
Todd: Alright, thanks
Neil: Of course! Anytime!
O CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN
Knox: if thats how you flirt i feel bad for anyone you ever liked
Charlie: ill have you know my flirting is top charts
Pitts: is this ever going to stop?
Charlie: not until knox admits his feelings for me!
Knox: im straight
Charlie: sure you are ;)
Neil: This has gone off the rails
Meeks: you made the groupchat
Neil: Yeah, I should’ve known better
Cameron: It’s 10pm, can you shut up so I can sleep?
Meeks: sleep is for the weak my friend
Charlie: sleep is for straight ppl
Cameron: I’m going to sleep
Charlie: no!
Todd: Did anyone else hear Charlie’s scream throughout the dorms?
Meeks: yes, terrifying
Cameron: Fine. I’ll just sleep in class then
Charlie: thats what i do. until SOMEONE wakes me up
Meeks: you have to pay attention in class sometimes Charlie
Todd: I’m gonna go to bed. Good night everyone!
Neil: Good night Todd!
Charlie: good night my new anxious friend!
Meeks: sleep well!
Neil: He’s not actually gone to bed. He just put his phone on silent and grabbed a book about Walt Whitman
Charlie: how dare he lie to us!
Pitts: i agree with Todd, good night
Meeks: good night! sweet dreams!
Charlie: dorks, going to bed so early
Neil: I’m off to bed too Charlie, goodnight
Charlie: lameee
Cameron: Same
Meeks: me too
Charlie: knoxy, will you stay up with me?
Knox: not a chance
Charlie: youre all so lameeee
Charlie: lameeeee
Charlie: youre all lameee
Meeks: shut up Charlie