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Seol Hee is finally setting her phone down to sleep when she hears her room’s door begin to slide open.
The intrusion only slides it part way open, enough to glance through into Seol Hee’s pitch black room. The faint light of the barracks hall shines behind them, dimly illuminating the figure which can only be one person in her mind.
“Illyana…?”
Seol Hee squints towards the door, attempting to see more through the darkness, to little success.
Illyana turns her head away. “Did I wake you?” She asks quietly.
Seol Hee shakes her head. “No,” she replies, shifting to prop herself up on her elbows, “I’ve been up trying to figure out this song...”
She watches as Illyana only nods in response.
“Why? What’s up?”
Illyana’s silent for another moment before she pushes the door the rest of the way open, stepping inside just enough to slide it shut behind her.
She leans back against the closed metal door. “What’s wrong with the song?”
Seol Hee eyes her for a moment, looking her up and down as best she can through the darkness before finally letting out a brief hum in thought. “It’s the bridge into the outro,” she explains, glancing over to her phone, “Everything I think of is either a bad ending or just… sucks .”
Her gaze drifts back up to see Illyana cross her arms.
“I’m sure it’ll come to you,” she says with a nod. Her tone turns teasing as she adds with a smirk, “Just hopefully not during a mission this time.”
Seol Hee giggles quietly and shrugs. “I can’t control when inspiration strikes.”
Her lips curl up into a smile as she observes Illyana, standing there quiet but, more importantly, still by the door.
“Sooo,” Seol Hee starts as she pushes herself up fully until she’s sat against the headboard. “Why are you actually here?” She asks with a slight tilt of her head. “I mean if you were sneaking in for what I thought , you’d already be in bed with me–” She winks, “–and I know you didn’t come to listen to me complain about a song again.”
“ So .” She pats the bed in front of her. “What’s up?”
Illyana turns her head, idly glancing around the room. “Should I be sneaking in for that?” She asks after a moment, voice taking on the same teasing tone, though with something slightly off about it when it reaches Seol Hee’s ears.
She gives a small, cheeky hum in response but otherwise stays silent and pointedly pats the bed again.
A faint sigh escapes from Illyana, her movements pausing for a moment except for her hand beginning to quietly fidget at her side. Eventually she pushes off the door and finally steps over to the bed, reaching down and shifting the blankets aside to sit in front of Seol Hee.
Seol Hee gives Illyana a small, gentle smile before reaching over for her hand, pausing when she feels a slight flinch once she makes contact.
Her smile falters. “Illyana…”
Though she lets her hand be taken, Illyana remains silent.
Seol Hee gives her hand a gentle squeeze to no avail, and it’s only when she lets out a sigh and opens her mouth again to talk that Illyana finally speaks.
“Nightmares,” she mumbles out, only audible to Seol Hee due to the complete silence of the room.
Seol Hee frowns. “Just now?” She asks, beginning to gently rub her thumb over the back of Illyana’s hand.
She responds with a short, half-hearted hum. “Now… Every night before that.”
“That's why you've been so tired…”
A nod. “Hard to fall asleep again after.”
Seol Hee’s eyes fall to their hands. “I’m sorry…”
Illyana shifts uncomfortably in place, “They aren't your fault.”
“I know, but… still,” she sighs, carefully raising Illyana’s hand to place a light kiss to the back of it. “Sorry.”
She returns her gaze to Illyana, continuing to soothe her thumb over her hand. “Do you wanna… tell me about them?” She asks carefully.
Illyana looks away, staying silent.
Seol Hee doesn’t push further, only giving a small nod to acknowledge the answer in the silence. It isn’t much of a surprise to her. She’s gathered bits and pieces of Illyana’s life back on her world through the occasional offhand comment or casual conversation; the X-Men, sorcery, The Soulsword, and Limbo. Seol Hee can only assume, and hope, there’s a good reason that the finer details have remained clouded despite their closeness.
Her eyes search Illyana for a moment, watching as she sits uncomfortably in place, staring out into the darkness. Seol Hee squeezes Illyana’s hand gently to get her attention before dropping it and shifting back in the bed slightly.
“Come here,” she says, giving a nod as she leans back against the headboard and holds out an open arm in invitation.
Illyana hesitates for a second but relents quickly, carefully turning and shifting back between Seol Hee’s legs until she’s close enough to lean back against her. Arms come down to wrap delicately around Illyana, pulling her just slightly closer.
Breathing in and letting out a heavy breath, Illyana slowly relaxes into Seol Hee; shoulders untensing and head falling back to rest against her chest.
Seol Hee smiles and squeezes her gently in a quick hug. “Think we can still talk?”
A nod.
After a moment to think, she asks, “How long have you been having them?”
“…Years,” Illyana quietly answers. She slides her hand over to take one of Seol Hee’s, resting them conjoined on her chest. “Before the entanglement.”
Seol Hee gives a short nod. “Have you found anything that helps?”
She feels Illyana shift slightly, and begins to gently rub her thumb over her hand again.
After a second, Illyana sighs. “Piotr. Kitty…” She trails off and lets out a single half-hearted chuckle, squeezing Seol Hee’s hand. “ You .”
Seol Hee’s thumb slows to a stop, though she feels a slight smile sneak onto her lips. “…Really?” She asks quietly, surprise and disbelief threading through the word as she stares down at the blonde head resting against her.
Illyana lets out a quiet grumble, shifting uncomfortably in her arms. “Don’t make a thing of it,” she mutters, hand letting go of Seol Hee’s and pulling away until Seol Hee quickly grabs it tight again.
“No, no– I just didn’t…” Seol Hee trails off. She sighs and leans down to press another kiss to Illyana’s head.
“How do I… help?” Seol Hee asks, voice gentle and careful.
Illyana huffs, staying silent again for a moment until she asks, “You promise not to be weird about it?”
Seol Hee’s brow furrows and she feels her lips quirk down. “Of course,” she says, giving her hand a quick squeeze. “You know I wouldn’t. Especially not for something like this.”
Illyana tilts her head back, getting a slight look at Seol Hee – who flashes her a quick smile – before returning her head to its place lying against her chest.
“A few days ago… when I couldn’t get back to sleep. I… thought of you and… I didn’t know what else to do… so I… triedlisteningtoasong ,” Illyana says, voice deteriorating into a mumble until her final admission comes out in a barely legible rush. It takes a moment to process in her mind but eventually Seol Hee understands.
“You… Really? ” She responds in almost disbelief, “Like, an actual 4L1T song?”
Illyana groans, her head lolling over to the side to stare off into the rest of the room.
“... Yeah .”
Seol Hee practically grins at the confirmation, and despite how much she attempts to bite it back, she can’t help a slight giggle from rising up.
Illyana groans and drops her hand.. “Ugh– You’re annoying ,” she says, turning around to begin to push herself away from Seol Hee despite the arms still wrapped around her.
“Hey. Hey– ” Seol Hee quickly says as she tightens her grip around Illyana, attempting to hold her back. “Come on! I’m not laughing at you– It’s just…” She squeezes Illyana into as much of a hug as she can as she pulls away. “You weren't a fan when I showed you! I didn’t expect it.”
Illyana eyes dart to her face and she huffs, and given she hasn’t broken free of Seol Hee’s grip – something they both know wouldn’t be a struggle – the follow-up must have at least placated her.
“So, it helped…?” Seol Hee asks softly, meeting Illyana’s gaze with a less blatantly joyous smile.
Illyana takes in a deep breath before she deflates against Seol Hee, resting her chin on her chest and looking away. “The song didn’t , but hearing you… being reminded of your presence…”
Seol Hee reaches her hand up to begin gently running her fingers through blonde hair. “I’m happy I could help. Really… it’s sweet.”
Illyana lets out a small huff. “Fine…”
Seol Hee hums softly, letting Illyana relax for a moment before speaking again, “Now, move a little. I’m not gonna be able to fall asleep like this.”
Illyana shifts her head to look at Seol Hee. “Huh?”
“You’re sleeping here. Aren’t you?” She says as she begins to shift down as best she can with Illyana on top of her.
“No. No– It’s fine,” Illyana says in response, shaking her head. She begins to move aside slightly, letting Seol Hee finish laying down. “I’m not gonna ruin your sleep.”
Seol Hee’s head falls to her pillow and she rolls her eyes as she looks up at Illyana, propped up above her to stare down. “I’ll be fine , Illyana.”
She continues to stare, clearly unconvinced and Seol Hee sighs.
Slowly, she reaches a hand up to gently cup her partner’s cheek and fee as she leans into the contact. “Don’t be dumb,” she says bluntly as she drops her hand and spreads her arms in invitation.
It takes another moment of Illyana staring, doubtful, until she slowly lowers herself down beside Seol Hee, who doesn’t even wait for her to hit the mattress before wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close.
“And besides,” Seol Hee starts, voice soft as she leans over to place a small kiss at the corner of Illyana’s lips. “It’s mostly just ‘cause you’re nice ‘n warm.”
A lazy smile creeps onto Illyana’s face even as she shakes her head. “If you say so,” she replies, snaking an arm around Seol Hee in return.
Seol Hee smiles as she watches Illyana’s head hit the pillow and her eyes quickly fall shut – seeing the way her face slowly relaxes and softens.
She follows soon after, shutting her eyes and letting herself relax fully against the bed and Illyana.
The tiredness catches up to her quickly, a reminder that she was up writing before Illyana came in. It’s only a murmur from Illyana that stops her from succumbing to slumber for another brief moment.
“Thanks, Seol…”
She smiles.
“Always.”