Work Text:
“Lights out in ten seconds.”
10… 9… 8… 7… 6… 5… 4… 3… 2…
1.
The only light that illuminated the room was the dim yellow of the piggy bank that hung from the ceiling. Each player that was left in the game so far was resting in their beds, some anxiously unable to sleep, others slumbering peacefully like there was nothing wrong with the situation they were currently in. The Squid Game was not what they all had thought it would be, it really was all what Gi-hun had said during Red Light, Green Light. Everyone’s lives were dwindling, and it was only a matter of time…
Nam-gyu wasn’t any different from the ones unable to sleep tonight. His anxiety was through the roof, his entire body trembling just by the thought of him possibly dying tomorrow. Or maybe he could even die tonight. He wasn’t sure, he didn’t trust anyone in this godforsaken game. They could all turn on him in an instant and he could be dead right then and there. Hell, even Min-su could betray him tonight, and Min-su was the most innocent looking guy there.
“Shit…” Nam-gyu breathed out, running his hands through his hair as he rolled over onto his back. He stared up at the ceiling for a moment, looking at the golden piggy bank that held hundreds of millions of won from each death that occurred in the game. His tracksuit was sticking to his skin from the amount of sweat he produced from just thinking alone. He was freaking out for no reason in particular. Well… he wasn’t wrong for freaking out, after all, he witnessed over 100 people die in the first game alone, who’s to say he wouldn’t be the next one? Who’s to say that he wouldn’t become just another number in that piggy bank? Fuck.
Soon enough Nam-gyu was sitting up in his bed, rubbing the palm of his hand against his chest in an attempt to ground himself. It wasn’t working well, but he might as well try. His heart was beating so hard against his ribcage, he thought that his bones would crack under the force alone. As if things couldn’t get any worse, Nam-gyu’s vision began to blur, and his ears began to ring. It was the only thing he could hear, besides the rough breaths he was taking. He was surprised no one else could hear his labored breaths, and as he began to crumple into himself, eyes darting every which way, he had caught a glimpse of… something. Something nearby. Something shiny. Nam-gyu’s wide eyes focused on the metallic shine that had caught his eye below his bed onto the lower bunk.
The cross necklace.
Nam-gyu had taken one of those candy shaped things that Thanos had in his necklace during the Six-Legged Pentathlon. He hadn’t told him what exactly the drug was, but it definitely made him calm down. If he could just take one more… just to sleep. Thanos wouldn’t even notice, right? Sure, it was selfish, but if Nam-gyu couldn’t sleep tonight, who knows what game they’d have tomorrow, and he’d be fucked if he was sleep deprived while playing.
After a moment of hesitation, Nam-gyu trying to steady his trembling hands, he began to scoot himself off of the mattress of his bed. Slowly, and as quietly as he could, he attempted to climb off of the bunk and onto the stairs, his socks making it so he didn’t make much noise with each step he took. The bunks had only swayed a little as he walked, but he steadied himself as he finally made it to the bottom bunk, looking toward the sleeping Thanos. All he had to do was open the necklace and take the candy out… it shouldn’t be that hard. Nam-gyu tucked his hair behind his ears, pursing his lips as he internally hyped himself up to commit this act of thievery. After a moment of steadying his breath, he took his steps towards the bed that Thanos was residing in. That fucker… he was able to sleep so peacefully even after today’s games? Nam-gyu couldn’t help but curse under his breath as he made it to Thanos’ bed, reaching his hand over to his chest. The closer Nam-gyu was, the more he could hear the other snoring softly, seeing his chest rise and fall with each breath. He was splayed out like he was having the best sleep of his life. No wonder… he was on drugs most of the time after all. How couldn’t he be calm and peaceful?
Nam-gyu was trying his best to make sure he wasn’t putting any of his weight onto Thanos as he reached toward the necklace, holding himself up with one of his hands, as the other hovered over the necklace. Just one… that’s all he needed…
“Nam-su.”
Nam-gyu nearly fell on top of Thanos as he heard the other’s voice out of nowhere. Shit! There was no way he woke up now!? Nam-gyu cleared his throat as he moved away from the other, beginning to retreat his hand from the necklace, but he felt his wrist get grabbed by the other’s warm hand.
“What the fuck you are doing?” Thanos spoke, his broken and mispronounced English prominent as always. Nam-gyu could only gulp as he looked at Thanos. He looked pretty damn guilty right now, huh… How was he supposed to save himself???
“Uh… Listen I…” Nam-gyu swallowed, and he slowly made his way onto the bed, sitting with a leg crossed, “I just… need another one of those things in your cross. I’m way too nervous to sleep. If I can’t sleep I won’t be able to perform well tomorrow with whatever game it is we play,” he glanced at his wrist, the one that was being held by Thanos’ hand. His grip was pretty firm on the other’s wrist, but it still didn’t stop the trembling in his hand, “See? My hands are shaking so much, I can’t sit still long enough to sleep. I’ll be a liability if I don’t have something to calm my nerves.”
In response to this, Thanos let go of Nam-gyu’s wrist and sat up in his bed. A sigh could be heard from him as he looked down at his necklace, holding the cross in the palm of his hand. Nam-gyu glanced from the cross, to Thanos, trying to read his expression in the darkness of the dim room. He tucked his hands in the sleeves of his jacket, and watched Thanos with anticipation, subconsciously inching closer to him.
“I don’t have much of this shit,” Thanos looked back to Nam-gyu, furrowing his brows a little as his lip pouted, “You already know that it’s fucking crazy man, and it’s pretty damn expensive.”
“Yeah I.. I know,” Nam-gyu nodded vigorously, agreeing with Thanos, as usual, “But, I really don’t wanna die, I don’t know what game is next and if I can’t sleep then—”
“Nam-su,” Thanos interrupted, holding his hand up as if to shush the other. Nam-gyu could only double down.
“Nam-gyu,” Nam-gyu awkwardly corrected the other, putting his hands into the pockets of his jacket as he slouched down.
“Yeah, Nam-gyu, that’s what I said,” Thanos looked to Nam-gyu for a moment, seeming to be thinking of his options. If he gave Nam-gyu another one of his drugs, he’d be down one more, and he had no idea how long he’d be staying in this game, but if he didn’t give him another, then Nam-gyu would definitely be a liability to him. It wasn’t like he could just kick him out of his team either… somehow, Thanos had grown used to his presence.
“Come here,” Thanos finally spoke, gesturing for the other to come closer to him. Nam-gyu had blinked a couple of times in surprise, unsure exactly what Thanos wanted him to do.
“Huh?”
“I said come here. Lay down,” Thanos replied bluntly. He had laid back into his bed, his hands sliding underneath his head as he got comfortable. Nam-gyu did as he was told, slowly laying down on his side next to Thanos. He didn’t know exactly what Thanos was thinking, and it was a bit hard to get comfortable on a bed as small as these. Nam-gyu watched as Thanos closed his eyes, tucking his necklace into his jacket before he truly got comfortable in his bed, shimmying his way deeper into the mattress.
“Listen, I can’t give you another one of these right now, I need them for myself,” Thanos explained, his voice a low whisper now, as he didn’t want to awaken any of the others nearby, “But, you can stay with me for the night, if you really can’t sleep all that well. Wouldn’t want you to pass out during one of the games.”
Nam-gyu nodded slightly in response, scooting a bit closer to Thanos as he explained. It made sense… though it still really sucked that he couldn’t have another one of those drugs. It was pretty nice, especially during those stressful games. Thanos didn’t seem to mind the other scooting closer, at least that’s what Nam-gyu had hoped. Thanos’ warmth was a good way to ground himself, and to be fair, he really couldn’t keep his hands away from him at any time. During the games he always, somehow, had a hand on him. Whether it be on his shoulder, his back, his arm… Nam-gyu had used Thanos’ warmth to give him his own sense of relief. It seemed like Thanos was used to it.
Soon enough, Nam-gyu had heard quiet snores once again, as Thanos had fallen back asleep. Nam-gyu’s eyebrow twitched slightly as he looked at the now soundly sleeping Thanos. This guy… he really didn’t care about the situation he was in right now. He didn’t care about the games, or the deaths, he was just having fun this whole time. Of course, the drugs had a big part in it, but Nam-gyu really looked up to Thanos because of that, in a way.
“Hey-” Nam-gyu whispered toward Thanos, but it was no use, as Thanos only sniffed in response, already too deep into his sleep to hear. Nam-gyu glanced back to Thanos’ chest, seeing the indent from the cross in his jacket. He really could just grab the necklace, take as many drugs as he wanted and get back to his bed, but…
Nam-gyu’s eyes trailed back to Thanos’ face, seeing how peaceful and at ease he looked as he slept. Albeit, he was snoring just a bit, but that still didn’t take away Thanos’ beauty to Nam-gyu. Shutting his eyes tight, Nam-gyu took a deep, shaky breath, feeling the knot in his chest loosen just a bit as his heart slowed. Thanos’ presence alone seemed to be calming him down.
“Nevermind…” Nam-gyu muttered. He opened his eyes slightly, looking back to Thanos’ sleeping form, and after a moment of gazing at him, he scooted as close as he could, slowly and shakily snaking his arm around Thanos’ torso. At first, he only hovered his hand over him, afraid he might wake up Thanos, and that Thanos would be disapproving, but after a few seconds, Nam-gyu thought “fuck it” and held Thanos close to him. The warmer he felt, the more at ease he was, and the less awake he felt as time went by. Eventually, Nam-gyu was able to drift off to sleep, his nerves finally calming enough for him to do so.
Thanos was better than any drug.