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It hurt to move. Illario felt like he was stabbed with a sword. Which is exactly why he hurt. Because he was. Stabbed through with a sword, that is.
He felt an arm tighten around his waist and she cracked his eyes open and raised his head slightly to look down. A mass of dark, cherry-red curls obscured most of his view of the small elven woman curled up next to him. Illario raised his hand and gently combed his fingers through her hair, eliciting a quiet sigh from her sleeping form.
Allona de Riva had looked utterly exhausted when she quietly opened the door to the room at the de Riva villa that he was spending his house arrest in the night before. She stood at his door, backlit by the light in the hallway. Her hair was wild, face smudged with soot and dirt. She looked at him with hope, fear, and the shadow of what she had been through in the last few years. He knew that he, Illario Dellamorte, was the cause of some of those shadows.
They had stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity before Illario pulled the blanket beside him down. Allona’s shoulders sagged in relief and she closed the door behind her. Illario watched as she stripped off every bit of the leather suit she wore as she shuffled to the side of the bed, letting them fall in in a trail. She pulled off the boots and let them fall with an audible thump. She crawled into the bed next to him and instinctively hooked one of her legs around his. He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer.
“Ari?”
Her voice was quiet and heavy with unasked questions.
“Shhh. I’m here. Now, we rest. Tomorrow, we’ll talk.”
And so it was now tomorrow, early afternoon, judging by the angle of the light streaming through the thin window of his room… his prison. Yes, it was a nicer prison than if his cousin would have had him officially locked up, but it was a prison, nonetheless. But for the first time in what seemed like ages… it felt bearable.
And right now, Illario hurt. He knew when he saw the Venatori asshole aim the blade at Allona, he had to do something. He knew the blow would have killed the small elf. And he would rather die than be in a world where she wasn’t. So he had jumped in front of the blade meant for her. Her magic healing stabilized him enough that they could use the Eluvians to take him back to Treviso to get looked after. He was still black and blue, and his wound needed time to heal. But he’ll live. Much to the dismay of others, he was sure.
Allona stirred beside him and lifted her head to look at him, and gave him a sleepy smile.
“Hey.”
“Hey,” Illario softly replied.
“That was a stupid thing you did, you could have died, Illario,” Allona scolded him.
Illario shrugged, “I have a habit of doing stupid things for love. This just won’t be one I’ll be regretting and trying to make up for the rest of my life. Besides, pretty sure that that blow didn’t kill me will piss more than a few people off.”
Something flashed in Allona’s eyes that Illario couldn’t quite place.
“You do know I’m going to be making it up to you for the rest of my life, right? I mean… if you’ll still have me, that is.”.
Allona looked at him and scoffed, “Illario Dellamorte, you took a blade for me and I crawled into your bed without a speck of makeup or lace.”
“To be fair, in the past, it has occasionally been leather or nothing at all.”
Allona reached and cupped his cheek with her hand, “If you’re an idiot, then so am I. There is no place I’d rather be than right here with you.”
“We are going to have to talk about some of the stupid shit I did.”
“Illario…”
“I did mean it, you know, when I said I did everything… for us, for you. Misguided, yes. But you deserve the world, Allona. I thought being First Talon was the way to do that.”
Illario paused, “you know she didn’t mean anything to me, right? Zara? She was a contract. A means to an end. You have been and always will be the only woman I have ever loved.”
Allona sighed and sat up. She looked and smiled sadly, “You’re too good at your job, you know. I heard what she called you.”
“What…”
“Amatus.”
“Oh…”
“You may not have loved her, but you fooled her enough to consider you her beloved.”
“Allona, I never cared about her. I only cared what she could do.”
“Oh, I know you never cared about her. Doesn’t make the secrecy hurt any less.”
Illario tilted his head, “out of curiosity, how did you know I didn’t care about her?”
“You, personally, killed her.”
Illario furrowed his brow in thought and Allona reached and and rubbed the line between his brows with her fingers while she continued, “While you have conflicting thoughts about your grandmother and cousin- bitterness, jealousy, just the need for acknowledgment- at the end of the day, you still care for them. You could have killed Lucanis yourself. You and I both know ways you could have utilized. But you didn’t, because you knew you couldn’t physically to do that to the man you considered your brother. And Caterina? Despite everything she did to you growing up? Everything she continued to do? You merely faked her death, you didn’t kill her.”
Illario looked thoughtfully at Allona as she continued her explanation.
“But Zara? You killed her with your own hands. Sure, it was a moment of desperation and preservation in the end, but you had no hesitation in the act.”
“Beauty and brains,” Illario murmured.
“The real question is, though… do I forgive you?”
Illario quickly glanced at her as she said that. He felt like his heart jumped into his throat upon hearing. Could he actually lose her now… forever? He thought he had lost her for good the night the depth of his betrayal. And again in the Fade. Was the Maker teasing him with Allona here now just to punish him?
“Do you?” Illario whispered.
“I do,” Allona sighed, “the bitterness and resentment about everything though? That… that’s going to take time to get over. And I did already tell you that there’s no place I’d rather be, right?”
“Well, there are certainly parts of you I wish parts of me would be.”
Allona gasped and lightly smacked him on the chest. Illario started laughing and winced at the pain radiating from his wound. Allona’s face quickly went somber.
“How bad does it hurt?”
“Not as much as not having you here.”
Allona leaned forward and gave him a soft kiss.
“Idiot.”
“Your idiot.”
“Always?”
“For as long as you find me worthy.”
The next few days carried on in a very uneventful manner. Illario woke up once with Allona curled against him, and Viago glaring at him from the doorway. But Viago had always glared at him, even before he had found out about Allona and him. Allona took care of him, washing his hair for him. She had snuck some of her soaps and creams to his room as Viago had left him with the bare necessities of soap and hair wash.
Yet, every so often, when she thought he wasn’t looking, Illario could see a flash of worry and uncertainty in her eyes. He wondered if she was already regretting her decision. Regretting him. Not that he would blame her. A lesser person wouldn’t have given him the chance that Allona did.
She was bringing him a glass of water one day when he grabbed her hand before she could walk away. She looked at him in surprise.
“Allona? Are you already regretting it?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your face. When you think I’m not looking. Do you regret staying with me?”
Allona bit her lip, “trust me when I tell you that you are stuck with me for a very long time, Illario. Though, some may say it is I who am stuck with you.”
It was Illario’s turn to look confused, “stuck with you? How can I be stuck in a relationship I willingly chose?”
Allona pulled her hand away from him and started pacing, running her hands through her hair, “We never talked about this or anything about the future.”
“Allona.”
“It was always about the here and now. This never crossed our minds. For a couple who fucked like bunnies… We love each other, but we never planned… especially not this.”
“Allona.”
“With how you grew up, how we each were raised? How can we even…”
“ALLONA DE RIVA!”
Allona froze, staring at him. In a quiet voice, she whispered, “I’m pregnant.”
Illario blinked. Had he heard that correctly, “scusi?”
Allona walked over to him, grabbed his hand, and rested it on her stomach. She looked at him, and still in the same quiet voice, “I’m pregnant. You’re going to be a father, Illario.”
Illario looked at his hand on Allona’s stomach. He spread his fingers out, covering a large area of the front of her dress. Allona… pregnant. With his child. She was going to be a mother. He, Illario Dellamorte, Master seducer of the Antivan Crows and reformed cad, was going to be a father.
Allona was right. This had never crossed their minds or popped up in any conversation they had ever had. It had never crossed his mind at any point. One would argue that before Allona, it would be shocking of him not to have heard that phrase from a one-off fling. But hearing those words from Allona?
“Are you angry?”
“What? No! I just… come here.” Illario said with a sigh, opening an arm up for Allona to crawl into. Which she promptly did, snuggling against his side and resting her head on her shoulder. Illario turned his head and pressed a kiss to her hair.
“Now, take a deep breath,” Illario paused as he heard Allona follow his instruction. “Now, to answer your previous question, no, I’m not mad. Surprised, yes. Though honestly, with us… shocked it hasn’t happened before this.”
“Illario!”
“Mmm, I love hearing my name on your lips once more.” He smiled as he felt Allona kiss his jaw. “Though, there are other sounds I love hearing from your lips. And don’t you dare smack me, woman. I’m healing!”
“So… you’re ok with all this?”
“Well, it wasn’t really on my timeline of things,” Illario said, “but we all know how extremely well-executed my plans usually are.” Illario suddenly started laughing.
"I'm trying to see what's so amusing about this, dear" Allona said, voice laced with mild annoyance.
"Oh, just thinking... next time somebody accuses me of being a mother fucker, I can tell them gladly."
"Ari..."
"Often."
"Illario."
"Sometimes, multiple times a night."
"Illario!"
Illario laughed harder and pulled Allona in for a kiss and rested his forehead against hers, saying softly, "I love you so fucking much.”
Allona smiled, “I know.” She looked at him thoughtfully before she looked away, but not before Illario noticed the flash of sadness that colored her turquoise eyes. Illario caressed her cheek with the back of his fingers.
“Bella ragazza, why the sad face?”
“Nothing. It’s… nothing.”
“Allona, you know how I am about repeating myself.”
Allona sighed, “I’m thinking about my mom. What would she think of this? Us? You?”
“My sweet, beautiful girl.” Illario pulled her close again, hugging her as close as he could without irritating his wound. He ran his fingers through Allona’s hair, knowing that had always worked to smooth her in the past. He spoke again, “Now, bella ragazza, what are you thinking?”
Illario felt her body relax as Allona let out a sigh before talking, “I may have fuzzy memories of her, but I know my mom loved me very much. She would make me little dolls, read to me, and was never shy from giving me affection. From what Zia Nonna told me, she was going to retire after the job where she died, to focus on me. I… just wish she were here.”
Illario thought about his parents. He always figured he reminded Caterina of his mother. While he was older than Allona was when she died, losing your parents at any age affects a child. From what he remembered, his mother was vivacious, rebellious, and followed her own way in life. She didn’t take easy to Caterina’s influence, wanting to forge her own path. One of the biggest sins was marrying a man Caterina didn’t approve of. A common craftsman, no less. A woodworker. Illario had the jewelry chest his father had made for his mother on their wedding day in his room.
“Oh, my mother would love you,” Illario chuckled, “she also commanded the attention of a room every time she entered. She embraced life, always wanting to try new foods, see new places, and experience things. She was loud and unapologetic about how she was. And stubborn as hell. Nobody could tell her what to do.”
“Sounds familiar.”
“Well, Caterina did try to beat some sense into me after my parents were killed. Literally.”
“Illario… what if Caterina…”
“No.” Illario said firmly, “Her treatment may have made me the man I am, but… it made me the man I am. I swear to you if she even attempts to do anything to our child like she did to Lucanis or myself… you are my family now, Allona. You and this baby. You two are the most important now.”
“So we’re at the top of the list, hmm?”
“Allona, the day I stepped in front of that blade cemented you in the very top slot on my list.” Illario paused, “Out of curiosity, how far along are you?”
Allona hesitated, “it’s tricky because of the whole Fade Prison bit. But Emmrich…”
“Emmrich?”
“The Nevaran necromancer? He was essentially our medic, but he estimates roughly two months. He told me the night before the battle.”
“Two months?” Illario thought back to when they were together for the baby to happen. That was the night… “well, shit.”
Allona laughed softly, “Well, shit, indeed. Imagine my shock when I found out. The night I thought my heart would be broken forever.”
“Well, I’ll be trying to fix my fuckup in every way possible. Wait… so you knew and still went into the battle?”
“Of course I did. The battle needed to be fought. Plus, thanks to you… I was fine.”
“Your siblings let you fight while pregnant?”
“Only Monello knows. He was there when Emmrich told me. He… wasn’t pleased.”
“We‘ll just add it to the list of why most people hate me.”
“Illario.”
“What? I said most?”
Illario felt Allona suddenly stiffen next to him.
“Illario?” she slowly asked.
“Hmm?”
“Have you been keeping up with the dosing regiment I taught you?”
“Sorry,” he said dryly, “I was busy plotting the death of my cousin, trying to be named heir apparent, then betraying the whole of the Crows, Antiva, and the only woman I ever loved to keep it up.”
“Please remind me why I still love you,” Allona said with an exasperated sigh.
“My impeccable style, charm, ridiculous good looks, the way I can hit that one spot of yours perfectly with my…”
“Illario…”
“No, I haven’t. Why.”
They looked at each other before both saying at the same time: “Viago.”
Allona buried her face in her hands, “he’s going to kill you.”
“Me? Why just me?”
“He actually likes me. He’ll kill you and just make my life hell.”
“Why must you be right so often?”
“Because my brains are as big as my bust.”
Illario eyed the aforementioned area of Allona, “no complaints here.”
Allona rolled her eyes and then slowly smirked. Illario raised an eyebrow. He knew that look. She was plotting. More accurately, she was plotting something about him.
Allona sighed dramatically, “Well if you are going to die by the hand of the Fifth Talon, I may have well make use of you while you’re still here.”
Illario caught the glint in her eye and chuckled, “Allona, I don’t know if you noticed, but I’m not exactly in the position to…”
“Are you sure about that, Ari?” Allona looked at him with her wide eyes as she pushed herself up on her knees. She threw a leg over his body and straddled his hips, her body nestled perfectly on top of a certain part of his anatomy. Illario let out a soft groan as he reached and squeezed her thighs. Allona leaned forward, resting her hands on the pillow on each side of his head, giving Illario a glimpse down her top.
“It seems to me… my love… is that you are in the perfect position to see if you can still reach that spot with your…”
Illario interrupted her with a kiss before proving to her that he could, in fact, still hit that spot. Several times.