Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

There are many choices I’ve made in my life that have led to consequences.

Like the time I decided to draw on the living room wall, and when I realized the trouble I’d be in, proceeded to shove my mom’s new white couch against said wall to hide it. It took a lot of time and effort to scrub that wall and the couch is still stained years later.

There was the time a friend and I found spray paint and tagged a mean boy’s house. We didn’t know how permanent that would be but it was funny to two young girls at the time. Of course, come nightfall a policeman was at the house with the boy’s grandmother because according to her I was ‘a good girl who told the truth.’ Crying, I spilled the beans, not only getting me and the other girl in trouble, but also losing my childhood best friend in one evening.

Not studying for finals and failing a test. Yelling at my mom and dealing with the guilt coating my insides as she cried. Not paying attention and having to take my drivers permit test three times.

All of those consequences were bearable compared to this one.

I was neither cool or popular, but in South Park everyone was invited to everything- there wouldn’t be enough people for a party otherwise. Clyde Donovon’s was the place to be that Friday night, and I already had more than enough to drink. I wasn’t big on dancing, but was content to stick close to the wall and nurse my half drunk plastic cup of cheap beer. My eyes, however, were glued to only one person in the room.

Kyle Broflovski had been a crush of mine for ages, he was smart and snarky, and god did I love his hair. We were…friendly acquaintances, not for lack of trying on my part. He was just always surrounded by friends and that was a little intimidating. It also didn’t help that he happened to be in all advanced classes while I was most definitely not. Tonight, with alcohol ravaging my system, I made the choice to grow a pair and talk to him. A choice.

To my happy little heart’s pleasure, we seemed to hit it off! We were laughing and joking as though we had always talked. He had obviously had a lot to drink himself, being more touchy than his usual casual demeanor. I recall trying not to blush and giggle every time his skin touched mine, a playful bump to the shoulder or the ghost of his hand on my back that made me dizzy. Drinks were shared over the course of the next few hours.

I had woken up tangled in sheets, sweaty and naked, confused after being jostled violently. The only other body in the room, Kyle, had been frantically pulling on his pants, fumbling with things on the nightstand and causing quite a bit of noise.I wasn’t even sure what one was supposed to do the morning after a hookup, but anything would be better than whatever this was. At the sound of me saying his name he practically fled from the room, leaving the sheets feeling cold and empty.

I tried to talk to him at school a number of times after that incident, but each time I was ignored. He would turn and speed walk away, get into conversation with anyone around him, and by the end just flat out didn’t respond to me. I just felt so guilty, I mean we were both drunk so I didn’t think anyone took advantage, but he was obviously uncomfortable. It wasn’t until Eric Cartman snapped, loudly declaring me as some stalker, that I backed down and left him alone. That was well over a month ago. That was before the little stick on the bathroom counter turned blue.

There’s something to be said, losing my virginity in a drunken haze to a boy that desperately wanted nothing to do with me. And to top it all off, now I was pregnant.

______

I was exhausted. The day had dragged on, and with ‘the thing’ as I’d begun to call it, growing inside me, it only made it worse. It also didn’t help that my anxiety had been flaring, Kyle was in two of my classes but still hadn’t even deigned to look at me. The thought of him had my heart twisting uncomfortably, but I knew I had no choice but to dismiss it. Things would be fine, it was after lunch and in no time I could go home and nap before inevitably going over what the fuck I was going to do for the hundreth time. I knew what I wanted, at least that’s what I was telling myself. It would be fine.  

And then Cartman walked into my sixth period with a steaming bag of taco bell.

The smell slowly entered my senses. At first I could ignore it as class started and the teacher lectured, the crinkling of the bag background noise. As the minutes ticked on my stomach began its now familiar churning. Whoever named it morning sickness was a bastard and I very much wanted to wring their neck. I adjusted myself, drank water, mouth breathed, everything I could think of as I felt the raging sea within me. Almost by its own volition, my hand shot up into the air.

“Yes, Y/N?” Mr. Garrison turned impatiently towards my side of the room, his eyes narrowed.

“Can I be excused, please?” I can do this. Just calmly go to the bathroom and you’ll be just fine.

“Can it wait?” Irritation was fleeting as I felt my body fighting the bile. I shook my head subtly, not wanting to make too much movement. “Well, that’s just too bad. Anyway-”

My chair screeched back as I rushed forward, slamming the classroom door open and sprinting to the closest bathroom. Just as my knees painfully hit the floor the torrent of sick left my mouth. Goddammit. I had not wanted to make a scene, and up to this point in time had done a pretty bang up job of it by avoiding the cafeteria and using the older bathrooms on the westside of school. Inevitably, this was bound to happen. Fuck Cartman and his fucking fast food.

I was unsure of how long I sat there with my body heaving and stinging eyes. After the fourth heave I couldn’t stop the sobs that came, my body shaking as I held on to the porcelain in front of me. I was so goddamn tired of this, of what was happening, of what would happen. It was all too much, why, just why did this happen to me? This was- the door to the bathroom opened, making me freeze.

Light steps sounded as they made their way to my stall, eventually revealing to belong to Wendy Testaburger. Setting down my bag that I only just noticed she had in hand, she knelt down and gave me a small smile.

“Are you okay?” It was such a small question, so simple, but here and now it felt like the biggest bit of kindness. Something about that, after weeks of dealing with rejection and wave after wave of anxieties, of beating myself up over bigger than life decisions, made me break. In an instant, the dark haired girl had me in her arms, shushing and patting my head as I cried into her.

It took a little coaxing from Wendy for me to unload everything. It was as if my body was waiting for the floodgates to open as it all spilled forth. I told her everything, from the fact that I don’t even remember my first time, to Kyle ignoring me, to the mornings waking up sick and putting the pieces together. I told her about how I went through every option I had, every scenario I could think of all while thinking ‘I’ve ruined his life. I fucked it up.’ I told her about how even with my decision, I wanted him to know, but after it all the thought of approaching him now sent me into a spiral.

I expected a look of judgement, or even discomfort as I had basically just dumped everything to this girl. Wendy only gazed at me with empathy in the way that made me feel seen. It made me feel less alone. It was as though with one look she wanted to assure me that things would be okay.

Chapter Text

Wendy set it all up of course, her Type A ways coming in handy. At the end of the next school day I was seated in the locker room, the hard wooden bench digging into my backside. I was working hard on willing the coiling pit of anxiety to calm as I counted the lockers down the row. We would tell Kyle about my condition and what I had decided, and then I would proceed with dealing with my parents and well…everything else. Easier said than done.

I could hear footfalls approaching, Wendy and two others. She said Stan should be there as a support for Kyle, especially since she was there for me. As worried as I was about even more people knowing about all this, I understood where she came from- this was another act of kindness on her part, and I was perfectly fine going along with it.

“Wendy, why are we in the girls locker room? I’m not getting into trouble again for this-” Kyle's voice abruptly stopped. I refused to look up, knowing the look I’d see on his face. Part of me wondered if he’d just turn around and leave, but god knows Wendy wouldn’t let that slide at this point, she had assured me of that at least. I kept my eyes down as I heard her take a deep breath.

“Kyle, there is a…bit of a situation you need to be privy to,” her voice was clear and calm, a contrast to the horrible news she was about to give him. Even as I tuned her out, the static in my ears turning loud, I could make out a few words of her explanation- “pregnant,” “her choice,” “on her own,” but I couldn’t hear any more, the constrictor that had been coiling tighter and tighter around my insides took hold.

My breaths came short as my vision blurred, the lockers in front of me turning into a sea of green. In a weak attempt to do something- anything - I crossed my arms and held myself, which unfortunately did nothing. Lungs on fire, my eyes bolted left and right for some sort of anchor, something to tie me in place. It was sudden when Stan came into view, kneeling in front of me. I vaguely felt rough hands resting on my knees as he spoke, trying to keep my eyes on his. It took another minute or two, but I felt myself come down, words of reassurance making it to my ears as I finally got a little air into my lungs.

“Just follow my breathing, that’s right. In and hold…now out. Good…” I hadn’t interacted much with Stan besides occasionally partnering for classwork. He seemed so nice despite what I just did to his best friend.

My heartrate spiked at the thought of Kyle. Finally, turning my head to look, I saw both him and Wendy staring at me with wide, worried eyes. Compared to when I saw him earlier, Kyle looked rough. He seemed lost, the harsh light from the locker room not doing much to hide his red rimmed orbs. As he moved toward me, I noticed the streak of a tear down one of his cheeks. Guilt rolled around in my head knowing that I was the reason for that look on his face. I half expected anger, anger at me for messing things up. 

Then, without a hint of malic, Kyle spoke to me for the first time since the incident.

“Can we…can we talk, like, privately?” He eyed Stan still seated in front of me. “I can drive you home, I just want to talk.” Oh. I…wasn't expecting that. With a nod to Wendy, telling her it was fine, I stood and prepared to follow him out. Just as I walked past the raven haired girl she wrapped her arms around me in a tight embrace, every feeling of comfort passed between us. I almost wanted to stay in that safety net she provided, but I still had things to do.

As the car warmed, Kyle and I sat in timid silence. It was weird, being in his car and so close to him. Any other time I’d be over the moon at the opportunity, but circumstances changed. I fidgeted in the passenger seat, toying with a thread by my thigh.

“How are you feeling?” asked Kyle hesitantly, moving his green eyes over to me.

“In what way?” I tried to make eye contact but failed, glancing away. “I mean, I feel sick all the time, which kind of sucks, but it’s something I’m kind of used to at this point. With all…this…I feel awful. Like I’ve done something really wrong…” I could feel tears slide down my cheeks before I could even attempt to stop them.

“Hey, hey- it’s alright! Just…” he sighed, roughly running fingers through his curls. “I am so, so sorry.” 

“W-what?”

“I’m sorry. I wouldn’t let you talk to me after…that night. I can’t imagine how you must’ve felt, I mean, you probably felt like you couldn’t even talk to me about this . And then, on top of that, you felt you had to do all of this alone. So, I’m sorry. Just, please talk me through this. I know Wendy already did, sort of, but…”

I wasn’t sure how to start, but I most definitely was not expecting an apology after dumping all of this on him. Shaking my head, I figured it wouldn’t do to rehash every little thing and told him only what I needed to.

“I found out about a month ago when I couldn’t keep anything down. Got a few tests from the store and…well you know. I, uh, I’m keeping it.” I heard Kyle inhale sharply but pressed on. “I thought about it and I don’t think I could do any other option- not that I don’t agree with them! I just…can’t. You…you don’t need to be involved. I know you have a lot going on and with college coming up I…I don’t want to be in the way… I wasn’t going to tell anyone that it was yours if you were concerned.” I mentally smacked myself for rambling.

“Have you told your parents?” he said after a beat of silence.

“I was waiting to tell you first. I figured at the very least you should know. But please, don’t feel like you have to-”

“I want to be involved.” Those 5 words stopped me in my tracks. With a swallow, Kyle repeated himself. “If you’re going through with this, I want to be involved. It’s my baby too.”

The word hit me like a speeding semi. I had yet to actually refer to what was growing inside me as a baby, as something real and tangible, and it had my stomach twisting.

“Okay,” I said quietly. What else could I say? I was all but ready to do this myself, but knowing that now that wasn’t the case I couldn’t help but feel relief. 

“I’ll tell my parents tonight then,” pulling out his phone and handing it to me with an empty contact to put in, Kyle prepared to back out of his parking spot and drive. “The sooner we get through that the sooner we can have some sort of plan, right?”

Typing in my number, I stayed silent for the short drive. Outside leaves were changing and people were out and enjoying the good weather. It did little to make me feel better, but at the very least it was a nice sight. 

“Do you want me there when you tell yours?” The question startled me out of my thoughts.

“No…it probably wouldn’t help anything.” and it wouldn’t. My parents were well aware of my single status, so that was already awkward enough. My mother, god love her, would support me through anything, but yelling and tears would be unavoidable. Once at my house I was quick to hop out with a small wave before walking into what felt like hell.

____

3rd Person POV:

Kyle felt like the biggest piece of shit. He knew leaving Y/N that morning like that was awful, but he was scared and panicked, and didn’t know what else to do. He knew that wasn’t an excuse.

It didn’t excuse weeks of ignoring her. Or weeks of letting his friends make rude remarks in a misguided defense of him. It didn’t excuse how she felt he wouldn’t want to help her.

His dad found him slumped on his bed, head in his hands. Tear filled eyes met those of his father, and somehow Gerald Broflovski knew that this wasn’t a little problem on his hands.

“What, what, what!” Sheila bellowed down the table, ignoring the call for peace from her husband. “ What do you mean you got some girl pregnant?! ” Oh she was pissed when her jersey accent got thick like that.

“I mean that she’s pregnant. It’s mine. I’m taking care of it.” Kyle ground out his words. He had already repeated himself three times, not including to his dad before. And then with his mother’s proclivity to run off the rails with things the conversation was already much longer than he wanted it to be.

“How would you know, Bubby? She could just be sleeping around for all you know! Do you even know this girl? Some ladie are easy-” 

“Stop!” his voice boomed, effectively quieting his mother. Any other time, he wouldn’t dare raise his voice, but after seeing Y/N that day, how small she looked in that locker room as Wendy talked to him, he couldn’t help it. “She didn’t even want to let me get involved, Ma. She was willing to do it all on her own so she wouldn’t ‘ruin my life’ or some shit.” The words Wendy had relayed kept bouncing around in his head over and over like a bad song on the radio. He couldn’t stop focusing on them.

“She was okay being entirely alone so that it wouldn’t affect me! I-I-” Kyle began to break down, breathing heavy as his body began to shake, quickly morphing into sobs. The reality of the situation had already hit him ten times over mentally, but to say it out loud was another thing entirely. He only looked up when he felt a soft hand on his shoulder.

“It’ll be alright, son. It sounds like she had some difficult decisions to make…” Gerald looked up from him to glance at Sheila. “We’ll figure it all out.”

____

Y/N POV

Kyle: How’d it go for you?

The message stared at me from the small phone screen. All in all, things went better than I had thought. Tears and some shouts, mostly from my dad, but by the end it had all calmed down. Apparently seeing one’s daughter absolutely lose it made a father soft, who would’ve known? The only thing I hated was the questions. The “who, what, when, where” of it all was not something I ever wanted to share with them. 

Me: Fine. More scared of my brother at this point. You?

Kyle:About as well as could be. My ma wants to meet you this weekend.

Kyle: You have a brother?

Me: Older one who’s kind of a huge asshole

Me: Sure, coincidentally my parents want to invite you to lunch tomorrow

Plans were made- lunch at mine and then an early dinner at his. Things were happening fast, and while part of me needed things to move forward I couldn’t stop myself from worrying about what was actually going to happen. How were we going to do this? Even if school and college weren’t a concern, there were still the intricacies of raising a real child while we were only just starting to learn how to be adults. 

Sleep was uneasy that night as question after question poured in. I could only hope Kyle was better off than I was.

Chapter Text

Despite how ‘well’ telling the parents may have gone, the thought of meeting his was terrifying. I had seen his mother and father around town, with South Park being as small as it was, but that didn’t make it any easier. It also didn’t help that my own parents were embarrassing enough as is without this whole awkward situation happening.

Fussing with my blouse, I tried to calm my nerves as I waited for Kyle to arrive. My mother thankfully kept things casual with sandwich fixings on the counter and a jug of tea on the table. She was even kind enough to cook up some bacon that I had been craving for BLT’s-one of the only things that didn’t immediately make me want to vomit. A knock at the door startled me from my thoughts- it was time to get this show on the road.

Kyle was dressed smartly, almost giving the impression of some weird, backwards date. It even looked like he had attempted to tame his curls, lightly styled with some gel. With a small smile he held out a small bouquet of daisies tied prettily in a green ribbon.

“I wasn’t sure what would be appropriate for this, but my dad said you can’t go wrong with flowers.” I clocked the slight tick in his jaw as he finished. I was almost glad he was as nervous as I was. Ushering him in, I tried to prolong the route to the kitchen.

“Just fair warning, my dad sometimes is a little strange. He isn’t the best at meeting new people so I’m really sorry about that.” 

“So long as there’s not a shotgun involved,” Kyle nervously laughed before we both were faced with two other adults.

“Mr. L/N, it’s nice to meet you,” he said with a slight crack as my father stood, his hand outstretched.

My father was a bit of a burly man and looked more than a little intimidating. I saw the slight shake of Kyle’s shoulders as my father shook his hand once before giving him a grin.

“Good to meet ya, bud,” giving me a wink. Then, giving a small secretive look to the two of us, leaned in and  lowered his voice. “Hey, what do hot dogs wear for protection….’condom’ents!” 

“Dad!” I ground out between my teeth while my father only laughed at his own joke. By weird, I meant my sperm donor was clearly unhinged enough to make a condom joke to the guy who got his daughter pregnant. However, a small part of me was thankful for his goofy tendencies.

“I told you to keep out the goddamn jokes!” my mother stepped up, lightly slapping him on the shoulder. “I am so sorry for the dumbass I call a husband, we tried to socialize him but as you can see it didn’t work. Please ignore him and fix a plate. You go last!” With a last smack to his shoulder, my mother gestured for us to go on.

“So, uh.. What was that?” I could hear the slight smirk on Kyle’s face, making me blush.

“Do. Not. Mention. It.”

The meeting itself went really well, in fact it seemed as though my parents avoided mention of the elephant in the room by just getting to know Kyle. But inevitably, things had to be addressed. It was my mom that finally got to business.

“I’m assuming you’ve talked to your parents?” Kyle nodded, prompting my mother on. “We have a while before we need to worry about big things like if you’ll stay here when the baby is born or what you two will do about day care eventually, but I do want to know your intentions. I was of the understanding you two were not together.”

I kept my head down. I was hoping there would be a slightly better way to transition into this conversation, but I suppose nothing about this could be subtle. From the corner of my eye I could see Kyle starting to drum his fingers along the top of the table.

“Well…” he cleared his throat. “I know I want to be in the baby’s life, It’s mine too and I want to help out. I already talked to my dad about a part time job and I have a car in case Y/N needs it…I want to be there for her…and them.”

I couldn’t help but look at him wide eyed. Sure, he had said as much in his car, but to know he had actually thought about things and took steps made my heart leap. From the look on my mother’s face, she was very pleased with his answer. 

“I will admit, Kyle, we aren’t exactly overjoyed with this. You both are still very young, and this kind of responsibility is hard , even for adults.” We nodded as my mother fussed with the tablecloth. “However, we can’t change things, so we’re going to be as positive about this as we can be.”

“My dad said the same thing, actually.” Kyle took a large sip of tea before continuing. “They don’t want us to feel like we won’t have any help.”

“We’re on the same page then,” both my parents smiled at us fondly, making me think about how lucky I was with them. After hearing horror stories online of how these sorts of things could go, I knew I should count my blessings. Just as my mom opened her mouth to say something else, the front door banged open, the sound loud enough to reach us from the next room over.

“ Where is she ?” Well, shit.

My brother was chill for the most part…unless it involved the ladies in his life. When our oldest sister had gotten pregnant at 19, he had blown up on her, her boyfriend, our parents, everyone. To know that some fiend, as he had put it, knocked up his sister was a crime he couldn’t let be. It didn’t help that the man was loud and obnoxious enough to begin with, and with me being his youngest sister, his bitching and yelling was sure to reach some sort of peak.

“Pregnant? Are you fucking kidding me, Y/N?” James stormed into the kitchen, looking ready to scrap. His wild eyes quickly landed on Kyle. “Oh! Who’s this? Did you knock her up, fucker !?”

My father was already on his feet, arms outstretched as he hastily approached my brother. As they yelled my mom mouthed for us to go, eyes darting towards the back screen door. I didn’t hesitate to grab Kyle and pull him out of what was going to be an ugly situation. I didn’t stop pulling him along until we reached the next street over.

“I am so, so sorry. Jesus, I didn’t think he’d just come over to the house.”

“That…was your brother?” Kyle looked a little shaken and confused. “I mean you told me he wouldn’t be happy but-”

“He’s a little protective.” I started to walk, allowing him to catch up to me as I spoke. “When dad called last night he was livid, we didn’t even need the speaker to hear him clearly. His wife said she’d keep him under wraps but…”

“Should I be worried?” At your pointed look he rephrased. “About you? I understand him being that way to me, but the way he sounded and looked at you was kind of scary.” At the insinuation I couldn’t stop the small bits of laughter leaving my mouth.

“God, no, James is mostly all bark and no bite,” I let out another huff of laughter. 

“You, sure?” I looked at Kyle curiously. His tone was filled with concern, but to think it was for me because of that one little interaction felt odd. 

“I am, but…I appreciate you looking out for me.” Bumping lightly into him, we continued on our walk as we waited for dinner time.

It was Kyle's turn to warn you, it seemed.

“So, my mom might be a bit…much,” Kyle said as you approached the Broflovski house. “My dad and Ike should be fine, just don’t take anything too personally.”

The home itself was warm, family photos littering the walls. I could hear bustling further in where I assumed the kitchen was as well as thumping upstairs. 

“Ma! We’re here!” Kyle called out, taking your jacket and setting it on the rack behind you.

“Bubby! You’re a tad bit early, did everything go alright- Oh, you must be Y/N!” The large red headed woman beelined toward me. From pictures alone I could see the resemblance Kyle had to his mother, but up close and in the flesh there was no doubt they were mother and son.

“H-hi Mrs. Broflovski,” holding out a shaky hand, I tried to smile. “Thank you for inviting me to dinner.”

“Oh nonsense, call me Sheila- we’re practically family now, aren’t we?” I barely had time to process what she said before being pulled into a bone crushing hug. “Now Kyle, go and get your brother, I need the two of you to set the table. Y/N, would you help me in the kitchen please?” 

I followed leaving behind a grumbling Kyle as he trudged up the stairs. The kitchen was just as cozy as the rest of the home, the aroma of food filling the space. I could tell she liked to entertain with the various items decorating the walls and the table. 

“Now I want you to tell me if anything smells off. I remember being so sensitive with my little Kyle, so I tried to stick to things that worked for me just in case.”

“Everything smells delicious Mrs. Broflo- Sheila.” and it really did. For once my stomach didn’t churn or flip at the different smells mixing together in the kitchen. For the first time in months I was excited to actually eat!

“Now, I did want to talk to you privately,” my heart skipped. Was this where I’d get chewed out for trapping her son? “Kyle told me about your…initial decision to do this alone. I was appalled at first, the thought of something like this being kept from my son. But then I realized how scared you must be.

“It takes a really strong individual to even consider going through all of that just to make sure the other person has a nice life. Kyle was really torn up about the whole thing. He wants to do right by you.”

The entire time Sheila spoke, I felt my eyes grow misty. I had sat in my room for hours upon hours debating and arguing with myself over what to do. It was terrifying and lonely, and in my mind that’s what it had to be, but now that image was starting to shift.

Dinner was relatively nice despite Kyle’s little brother being as blunt as any preteen boy would be. The minute he spotted me he did a double take.

“How did you get her to fuck you, dude?”

“Ike Broflovski!” Sheila admonished loudly, “we do not use that language in this house!”

“What do you mean how, you little cretin?” Kyle sat down his fork to glower at the younger boy.

“Well she’s kind of hot and you’re…you.” Ike plastered on a look of mock disgust as Gerald tried to hide his chuckle.

“Boys, knock it off.” Gerald was nothing but nice when he shook my hand, welcoming me into his home. In some ways, like when he’s very entertained by his children’s bickering, he reminded me of my own dad.

“So, are you guys gonna get married now or whatever?” teased Ike. The reaction was immediate as forks clattered to plates. Ike, not bothered but pleased with how wide eyed his brother looked, just continued. “I thought when you had a baby you were supposed to be married. Figured with you being a goody two shoes that was in the plan, bro.”

The table stayed silent for a moment, the awkwardness of his statement setting in. Picking up my own fork I tried to just keep my gaze down and keep eating, something to do so as not to actually think of that topic or how it sent a jolt of pain to my heart. I hear Gerald clear his throat.

“Well, Ike, you don’t have to be married to have a baby-”

“But it is preferred!” Sheila cut in. “Speaking of, I did want to ask you two if that was something we should consider.”

“Ma!” Kyle was red in the face, nearly the same shade as his own flaming hair. 

“What Bubby?! I just think it would be good for the baby if their parents are together is all! It’s only proper.”

“Sheila, I don’t think-” Gerald was abruptly cut off.

“It wouldn’t have to be anything big, just something intimate. I’m sure your mother would feel the same, right Y/N?” Her gaze shifted over to me, and suddenly I was in the spotlight. With four pairs of eyes on me I couldn’t help but fidget in my chair uncomfortably.

“It was brought up briefly, but dropped. My mom doesn’t want me to get married in high school…” I refrained from mentioning how even if she allowed it, I couldn’t just marry a guy who didn’t love me. Kyle slept with me because of a few drinks, nothing more than that. I had only just begun to accept that he was okay with his life being upended for a kid, but to trap him in a marriage especially at this age was too much.

“Well, I suppose that’s that then.” Sheila hummed disappointedly, before looking back at me in interest. “Are you dating someone else, is that it?”

“Oh, god no!” I hurriedly got out just as Kyle choked on a bite of his food. 

“Well, good!” I sighed, hoping everything was dropped. It was only a few more minutes into comfortable silence that she piped up once more. “So, Y/N, have you started your doctor’s appointments yet?”

“Not yet, but I do have one on Monday.” I bit my lip for a second, glancing over at Kyle who to my surprise was looking at me with interest. “My mom said she wants to get a handle on everything medical first since that can be pretty stressful.”

“She would be absolutely right! You know, when I was pregnant with Kyle, my mother told me…” Sheila carried on through much of the dinner as I tried to pay attention and eat at the same time. Kyle stayed quiet the rest of the dinner, and I couldn’t help but wonder about what was on his mind.

“I’m really sorry about my ma, she can get a little…nosey? I didn’t think she’d bring up getting m-married.” stumbling over his words, Kyle walked me to his front door, grabbing my coat for me.

“It’s alright, we can consider it even with what happened at my house.” I tried to smile reassuringly, knowing it probably came out more like a grimace. “By the way, did you…want to come to that doctor’s appointment with me? My mom brought up that I should ask you about going, since you’re the dad and all…”

“Oh! Uh…yeah! I’ll go.” Kyle grinned then, the first real smile he’d given me since being at his house. “Just let me know what time!”

With a goodbye to Kyle, I walked home. Heaving a large sigh, I thought to myself that things really could’ve been worse, but instead I felt welcomed with open arms and even if things were a little weird, that was alright. We got through this obstacle, how bad could any of the other ones be?

Chapter Text

I quickly learned that when Kyle was nervous, he drummed his fingers along any surface he could reach. In the car it was along the seat between him and I as my mother lightly chatted with us. In the waiting area it was along the armrest of his chair. Even when we were brought back into another room he drummed along his own leg. One would think it would be the expectant mother to be so twitchy, but here Kyle was, drumming away every second.

The appointment itself so far had been nothing too special aside from Kyle having to step out for a moment so I could have a small pelvic exam, a blush reddening his cheeks once he realized what was going on. The doctor we had was quick to take notes of all the answers I had to his many, many, many questions, occasionally slipping in a few bits of advice for what I needed to do during my pregnancy. 

Being about 10 weeks, I was apparently in for a little treat!

All too soon, my shirt was lifted as the nurse explained she’d be using a doppler to look at the baby's heartbeat. With my abdomen bared I could sense Kyle stiffening next to me, making me all too aware of how weird this all was. I was about to ask if he was alright when the cool jelly covering the device hit my skin, causing me to hiss. With an apology, the nurse pushed a few buttons, and a steady beat filled the room.

I still hadn’t quite grasped that I had a small, living thing inside of me, up to this point if it had felt a little unreal. But as I heard the rhythmic thumping I couldn’t help but feel strange, no other word properly describing it. Looking over at Kyle I was surprised to see a look of awe on his face as he took in the sound. 

Afterwards we even got to see it on the ultrasound- a small speck the nurse said was about the size of a strawberry. I couldn’t imagine that over time it would grow to look more and more like an actual child, that one day it would be out into the world. It was terrifying but for the first time I felt the tingle of excitement at the thought. 

Neither of us said anything on the ride home, our first pictures of our child tucked safely away.

3rd POV:

Kyle woke to the frantic buzzing of his phone, the screen lighting up the dark room. A quick glance showed that it was 1:30 in the morning, nearly causing him to hit ignore and go back to bed. This wouldn’t be the first time Stan called drunk or Cartman called with some random bullshit in the middle of the night. However, at the sight of a certain girl’s name, he sat up straight.

“Hello?”

“Kyle-” He could hear her voice break as she said his name, some sort of movement on the other end muffling it for a moment. A few other voices were in the background but they were too far to tell what they were saying.

“What’s wrong?”

“I-I’m bleeding…a lot. Mom’s taking me to the hospital-” a shuddering breath sounded and Kyle was out of bed pulling on yesterday’s jeans.

“I’ll meet you there, just…” He scrambled trying to think of anything to say, but his mind was blank. “Just, it’ll be okay, I’ll see you soon.” 

Once the phone was hung up he scattered trying to get ready, the only thing on his mind being that he needed to get to her. Things would be fine, right? Just yesterday everything was just fine, that couldn’t change that quickly. But what if it wasn’t? He should be there. He would be there. What if-

“Bubby? What are you doing up?” Sheila stood at the top of the stairs in her nightgown, watching her son struggling to jam his boots on.

“Y/N is going to the hospital, she’s bleeding-” Kyle’s sight began to blur as he spoke. “She’s worried about the baby.” His motions grew a bit more frantic as it hit him. He needed to go, he needed to be there for her, needed to-

Sheila held his shoulders, directing him towards the door and outside to her car. Somehow in the time he began to panic, his mother had grabbed their jackets and keys, shoes on her feet ready to go.

Kyle knew she was talking to him, words of reassurance and calm, but he heard none of it. All he could focus on was getting to Y/N and making sure she was fine. This town was incredibly small, he could practically tell anyone how many traffic lights they needed to pass to get where they needed to go, but right now it felt like the world’s longest drive.

Hospital doors opened to the frantic redhead rushing in, his mother taking time to go and park the car. The poor nurse barely looked up before Kyle was demanding to know where Y/N was, not even registering that in the same sentence he also asked where his child was. Hell’s Pass was thankfully small, and she quickly pointed him to a room down the hall to his left.

Green eyes quickly found her, sitting sullenly on an examination table with tears streaking her cheeks. He couldn’t stop himself from rushing in and taking Y/N’s face in his hands, making her look at him. 

“What’s going on? Are you alright? Is it…?” More tears came and Kyle felt his heart constrict. 

“The baby is fine.” Relief flooded his senses, but then came concern as the girl in front of him kept crying.

“Hey, it’s okay! That’s a good thing that they’re fine!” Moving his grip to her arms, he lightly rubbed up and down in what he hoped was a calming gesture. “Are you okay? You mentioned bleeding.”

“It was just really scary,” Y/N’s hands found themselves twisting the hem of her shirt. “I just didn’t want anything to happen to it…” 

“Well, nothing did. Everything is fine, right?” Kyle smiled, using a thumb to gently wipe the tears away. There was something about this whole situation that started to click a few things in place for him, things he found rather surprising. “What did the doctor say?”

“They weren’t really sure why there was so much, they said bleeding can happen in the first trimester, but it was still a lot,” hiccuping slightly, Y/N reached around her, pulling out a piece of paper. “They said everything looks fine, but they want me to watch for a few things.”

“Let me see,” After skimming the words he pulled out his phone, snapping a quick picture. At Y/N’s questioning look he sighed. “This way I can make sure we’re both on the same page. We want a healthy baby and a healthy you. So if I have to keep track of things, I will.”

At his statement, Y/N couldn’t help but feel a thrum of affection for the boy in front of her, his face set so serious. It shouldn’t surprise her that he cared about the baby, but to hear that sentiment extended to her made her melt just a little despite the stress she was under.

Walking back out into the waiting room, the two teens found their mothers chatting, heads put together, only breaking apart when they finally noticed their children. Sheila was the first to speak, already grabbing the girl up into a hug.

“Your mother told me everything was fine, thank god!” In the fluorescent light of the hospital Kyle was sure it looked a bit strange, four people standing close, each either in pajamas or some sort of rumpled clothing, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “Kyle was so worried, weren’t you Bubby?”

“Ma!” flushing, Kyle looked off to the side. “I just wanted to make sure she was alright.”

I gave Kyle a grateful smile, immediately yawning afterwards. With everything said and done, both families separated for their own homes, sleep not coming easy after a stressful night.

Chapter Text

“Jesus Christ, dude,” Stan’s voice cut through on the phone, a slight static ringing from his shitty reception on the farm. “Everyone’s okay though?”

“Yeah, they want to watch a few things with her just in case, but otherwise they’re both good,” Kyle lazily spun in his chair while his phone sat on the desk in front of him. Both he and Y/N took the day off with all the hubbub going on, though she would be taking an extra day herself. Part of him was glad as he really didn’t like the idea of her stressing herself out.

“You must’ve been a little shaken up,” Stan wrassled with something on his end of the line for a moment while he cursed. “Is Y/N doing alright?”

Letting out a sigh, Kyle thought of the girl that had been on his mind constantly lately. It hadn’t even been a week and already he felt attached, not just to the baby but to her. He could blame it on guilt for all that he initially put her through, he could call it him wanting to grow up and be a better man, but after that night in the hospital he knew better.

The idea that something was wrong, that he could’ve lost what would be his child, or even Y/N, terrified him. He knew that if any of the other boys in his class were in his place perhaps they would’ve wanted a different outcome, a chance to be free of this large responsibility. For him, knowing those two were safe and healthy only brought relief. He wasn’t overly religious but he couldn’t deny the small prayer he said when he got home.

“Kyle?” Snapping out of his thoughts, he answered Stan.

“She’s doing okay, but I can tell she’s still nervous about it.” They still had another couple of weeks until the second trimester, weeks he hoped would come quickly. Even through text he could tell Y/N was anxious, short responses somehow conveying her emotions very well to the redhead.

“I’m glad to hear,” Stan stayed silent for a moment, as though debating on asking his next question. “Did you think about what to tell the guys? I don’t know if I can dodge their questions for much longer.” Being absent in a group like his went noticed fairly quickly, especially since he didn’t have a girlfriend that they knew of to fill his time.

“Yeah, yeah…think we could get them together tonight? I just want to get it over with.”

The thing about Kyle’s friends was that every single one of them were assholes. They ripped on each other for anything and everything, nothing was off limits. He himself had even joined in on making fun of the others, cracking his own jokes at the expense of a friend who got over it quickly enough. What worried him was that at times these things went overboard, dipping into situations where feelings were more than hurt and punches were thrown. To top all of this off, he knew that there had been jokes made about Y/N due to his own asshole treatment of her, and that made him sweat.

A cacophony of voices filled the space, bouncing off concrete on all sides. Cartman’s basement was a safe haven for teenage boy shenanigans, many sleepovers and raunchy jokes shared within its 4 walls. It was a familiar meeting place and just what Kyle needed for what he knew would be a long conversation.

“Kyle, why the hell are we all here? I could be playing COD upstairs without you jackasses but nooooo.” Cartman lounged in an armchair, a half open bottle of double dew pointed at the offending jew.

“Yeah dude, Bebe’s parents are literally gone right now, I could be hitting that!” Clyde chimed in from the other side of the room. At that comment more and more of the boys began to ask questions.

Pinching his nose, a habit passed over from Stan, Kyle took a calming breath. Somehow this felt worse than telling his own parents. As voices twisted with one another he felt himself grow more and more irritated.

“Enough!” At his shouting the boys closest to him began to grumble, quieting down. “This is actually kind of serious, so I need you to listen!.” Once it appeared that no one would outright interrupt him, Kyle took another breath and broke the news.

“Y/N is pregnant and it’s mine. We are keeping it.” a vile look was shot at Cartman who had opened his mouth. “I know there was a lot of shit earlier with me ignoring her, but I need you all to cut it out. The other night we…had an incident at the hospital and she’s a little wound up. I just ask that you guys at least try to be nice to her, maybe keep an eye on her in class if I’m not there.”

Silence followed, and Kyle could feel himself grow hot under his hat. Slowly, a hand raised into the air.

“Yes Butters?”

“Is Y/N okay? Since you all went to the hospital and all?” His eyes looked wide and concerned at the ginger. Butters may not have been the coolest of the bunch gathered, but it was times like this that Kyle found he really treasured the blond boy.

“Yeah, everyone is fine, we were just worried about the baby. It was a little scary.” Another beat of silence, each of the boys looking at each other as though not sure what to say.

“So, you’re going to be, like, an actual dad then?” Kenny lazily flicked ashes from his cigarette into an empty can. “I mean, you’ll be a good one, that’s for sure.” Eyes abruptly turned to the orange clad teen.

“Dude, he’s like 17, he’s got college and shit!” Someone spat from the back.

“Okay and? Shit happens, at least he’s taking responsibility! Kyle will make things work, he always does.” Kenny sent him a sly smile before turning back to his own devices. With that being said, the collective breath of air in the room seemed to release.

“Are you scared at all man? If Bebe got knocked up I’d probably shit myself.” Tolkien nodded along with Clyde in agreement.

“Well, yeah, of course I am. I’m going to have a kid to look after and keep safe. I don’t even remember the last time I held a baby…maybe when we got Ike?” Kyle thought back, recalling the little bundle of blue his mother handed him when they got back from Canada. He was so impossibly small, even in his child sized arms. Would his own baby be that small? Before Kyle could get into his own mind about it Butters cut in.

“Y/N is really pretty, so I’m sure it’ll be cute!” edging his way closer, Butters looked at him with shining eyes. “Does this mean you two are together now?”

Kyle had to ponder that. He definitely thought Y/N was pretty, after all he did take her to bed that night. He also enjoyed the little bits of herself that she gave whenever they talked. He also knew that after everything he found he cared for the girl a great deal.

“Just because he knocked her up doesn’t mean he has to like her,” Cartman gave the blond a short look. “His fault for not wrapping it up anyway, now he’s stuck with Y/N, his own little stalker!”

Stan didn’t even have time to catch Kyle’s arms as he swung, a fist landing right onto Cartman’s cheekbone. The boys around them moved fast, getting out of the way and making space as Stan broke them up.

“I asked nicely you piece of shit!” Kyle seethed, glaring down at the brunette. “You can rip on me all you want, but keep her name out of your fucking mouth!”

Trudging home, Kyle felt restless. He figured things would be a bit awkward but Cartman just got under his skin like some sort of bug. Once Stan got them apart he proceeded to act like nothing even happened, which only pissed Kyle off more, so he left. Kicking a nearby rock he realized he had unconsciously made it to the front of Y/N’s house. 

Butters' question kept bubbling forth in his mind. Were they together? No, not in a traditional sense. He never asked her out or went on dates, but at this point they were more than just two kids casually hooking up for a night. Another question pushed through- Did he want to be together with her?  

Going by his mother’s logic they should be since there was a child in the mix now, but something about that felt so utterly fake. He hated the idea of people getting together just for that reason alone, he had seen what that sort of relationship had done to some of his friends growing up.

Looking up Kyle saw that a light was on, purple curtains flimsy enough for the light to shine through. Part of him hoped that it was Y/N’s room, and the other part of him wondered why he hoped that, but he knew. He knew himself enough to admit that he found her intriguing and cute, that he had an urge to keep her safe, and it wasn’t entirely because of the situation they were in.

Kyle: Hey! Are you up?

Kyle: I’m outside your house. Wanna chat for a bit?

He mentally cringed at how it sounded, but sent the messages anyway. Looking up at the lit room he found himself pleased to see her little face looking out into the dark, confusion morphing into surprise when she spotted him down below.

Y/N: Be out in a minute!

In two, she was quietly stepping outside. Kyle was amused, seeing that already Y/N was in pajamas, flannel pants and an overly large t-shirt practically swallowing her up. Kyle found it only too cute, walking up to greet her. 

“Is everything alright?” her voice was filled with concern as she sat on the front steps and gestured for him to do the same.

“Yeah, just happened to be here and thought it’d be nice to just talk…we haven’t really done a lot of that.” Bumping her shoulder lightly, he gave her a big grin. “So what have you been doing all day?”

“Oh, nothing really…” Y/N’s hands twisted in the hem of her shirt, awkwardly looking away.

“I doubt that,” with a chuckle Kyle turned a bit towards her. “C’mon, actually tell me about it. I won’t go away until you do.” She giggled a bit, making Kyle feel a little flushed. 

“Well, since you want to know so badly,” giving him a little smile, Y/N told him about her day, which in turn led to both of them both laughing at something her father had said that evening. As Kyle watched the girl in front of him laugh, her shoulders no longer hunched up to her shoulders and her eyes no longer filled with worry, he thought that maybe he did like her a little more than he thought.

Chapter Text

People knew. From the stares I had received to the snickers I heard behind my back, I was aware that news had spread. 

My thoughts had already been jumbled for the last few weeks, everything seemed to go at the speed of light and I had barely a moment to breathe between school, homework, and all the baby talk that infiltrated my household. The only relief I had was making it past my first trimester, a small weight lifted from my shoulders once I marked the day off my calendar. 

However, I still had to deal with the cruelty of teenagers. It wasn’t a surprise, TV and movies had at least shown the brutality of high school in some form, but to actually experience it was another thing entirely. Behind my back I could at least choose to ignore it all, but recently things began to change.

There seemed to be an unspoken understanding among my class that this wasn’t to be discussed, at least around me, but that didn’t apply to the other grades. Barely concealed whispers and gestures had been pointed in my direction and I had heard more than enough dirty remarks made about me by some younger boys.

The biggest issue lied with a particular group of boys the grade below, the main one being a Dillion Whoever-the-hell who thought he was hot shit for being an ass. While others might've said something and then went back to whatever they were doing, Dillon and his friends seemed to derive joy from being particularly nasty to me, the comments being more ruthless and vulgar than any other I had heard. It took less than a week for actual contact to be made, passing lockers I had stumbled more than once due to a small shove or well placed foot, and I swear one of the bastards pinched my ass just the other day.

I refused to tell Kyle.

He had already been too understanding, too kind to me. Hell, his mother was having him bring me lunches so I’d have something I could keep down! I could also tell he had a little chat with his friends, comments made by his little group stopping immediately after I had gotten back to school. He was trying and I appreciated that, truly. I just didn’t want to drag him into this when he had more to worry about with basketball season and midterms quickly approaching. 

This morning I had only just switched my books out when Kyle appeared, hovering at my side with his tall, lanky frame.

“G’morning Y/N,” he greeted with a smile.

“...Hey Kyle,” I still found myself unused to his, or anyone’s, attention. Seeking me out was a bit of a new habit of his, walking me to class, taking me home, texting to see how I was in the evenings. I wasn’t sure what to make of it all.

“Here, let me carry your bag,” I could do little to stop Kyle as he hoisted my backpack up onto his free shoulder, his gaze turning to me expectantly. This was another habit, one I tried to stop immediately but with how tall he was, could do nothing about it.

“You know I’m not an invalid because I’m pregnant, right?” I said as we walked side by side, the flood of students parted easily.

“I was reading online that you shouldn’t be doing any heavy lifting.”

“Three textbooks and a couple notebooks isn’t heavy lifting, I can-” He cut me off with that look. The one that meant no arguing I had learned.

“I’m going to carry your books, Y/N, I told you before. Don’t fight me on this, please. ” When he seemed sure I wouldn’t argue, he relaxed. “How are you feeling about being in the second trimester?” The fact that he remembered made my stomach flutter a bit.

“Weird. Like it’s a third of the way done and it didn’t feel very long at all.” That scared me a bit. My mother kept saying how we had time to get things in order, but at this pace it was as though I could clearly see the clock ticking down the seconds.

As we talked we passed by a particular set of lockers I began to hate. Dillion and his posse of assholes, as I had started calling them in my head, tended to loiter there. Avoiding the gazes I knew were thrown my way, I sped up making Kyle have to keep pace.

“Hey, is something bothering you? You’re a bit…”

“A bit what?” I ground out, trying to keep the irritation out of my voice.

“Tense. Like you keep looking around and never seem comfortable.” I could hear more questions behind what he said and sighed.

“Nothing is wrong, Kyle. Let’s just get to class.” With a huff, I passed by him into the classroom, thankful for the ring of the bell as we took our respective seats. The entire class I could feel Kyle’s gaze on me, eyes burning a hole into the side of my head.

“Yo slut!” The harsh words made me jump, my guard coming up immediately. “I know you hear me!”

An arm wrapped roughly around my shoulders practically corralling me over to the empty space near the bottom of the stairwell. I didn’t need to even glance over to tell me exactly who it was.

“Gotta say, it seems like you’ve been avoiding us lately!” Dillion had a teasing lilt, one that made my stomach twist. A few of the other boys around nodded empathetically. “Been kind of hurting our feelings over here.”

I stayed silent, knowing that regardless of whatever I said this would turn out just the same. They’d say some horrible shit to me, and I’d pretend to brush it off only to cry about it later. Words that I knew would replay over and over in my head while I acted like everything in my life was just as it should me. That I wasn’t some fuck up- blunt nails dug into my shoulder, making me hiss in pain.

“It’s almost as if you think you’re too good for us now,” giving a bitter laugh, Dillon shoved me into the middle of their group.

“Dumb whore-” one boy shot out as others started murmuring their own insults. “Dumb enough to get knocked up, all used and shit. Fucking worthless now.”

In the back of my mind I knew this whole exchange was nothing but a bunch of teenage boys trying to feel big and bad, that the bullshit they spewed was to make them feel better. Kids like these spotted a person with any kind of difference and that somehow gave them permission to ridicule and attack. I knew all of this, but in this moment in time with hormones running rampant and anxiety at every turn, on top of everything else I had to fucking deal with, I couldn’t help but feel it. I felt those words being carved into my skin like angry scars, constantly reminding me that what I was now wasn’t a good thing. I wasn't a good thing.

Getting into my own head I tuned out of the conversation which only seemed to piss them off. Another shove from my side, this one rougher than the last, nearly brought me to the ground as they laughed.

“What the fuck are you doing?” A nasally voice cut through their chuckles, causing the group of boys to look up. 

There, standing stock still, was Craig Tucker hand in hand with Tweek, Kenny close behind. All three held equally confused and pissed off expressions.

“None of your business, Fucker. Now go away.” Dillion turned towards me paying them no mind, only to have a hand tightly grip his shoulder and rip him back around.

“You being an asshole to a pregnant girl kind of is though,” Kenny’s eyes flashed dangerously, flickering between me and the boy in his grasp.

“She’s just some whore, why do you care?”

“ACK!- Don’t call her that!” Tweek stepped up despite his obvious shaking.

“Or what? Last I saw you all weren’t even talking to the bitch! Unless you wanted to use the whore too then you’ll need to get in line behind us and-” A sickening crunch was heard as Kenny’s first drove into its intended target.

Immediately blood flowed from Dillon’s face, his yelp attracting the attention of nearby teachers waiting for the last of their students to file into their rooms. Through my shock I almost didn’t register broad gentle hands leading me away from the scene.

“Hey,” Craig’s neutral tone broke my eyes away from the two boys now tussling on the floor. “You alright?” Tweek was still nervously glancing towards the fight, yells and shouts overlapping with those of the panicked adults.

“I-I’m fine, really. It’s fine.” While Tweek always appeared to be ready to explode, it forever seemed like Craig was bored, uninterested in anything and everything. This close, however, I could see that wasn’t entirely the case as his eyes, dark and stormy, scanned my face in what I assumed was an assessment. Making quick eye contact with his boyfriend, an understanding passed between the two. Before I knew it Craig had a hold of my arm and started tugging me along behind him, his long strides making it difficult to keep pace.

“Where are you going?” The bell had rung, leaving the halls scarce of students. I was already going to be extremely late with my class being in the completely opposite direction.

“ We are going to find Kyle.” At that name my feet halted nearly causing the blue hatted boy to almost drag me along the floor. His eyes, no longer assessing, looked at me in question.

“I don’t want Kyle to know.”

“Why?” Craig asked, his face blank. Geez, this guy doesn’t give anything away, does he?

“He’s already doing a lot, and this isn't a big deal.” At his arched brow I added, “It’s been going on for a while and I can handle it myself.”

“Hm.” Taking out his phone he typed for a minute, keeping his hand firm on my upper arm.

“Can I go to class now-”

“No.” His voice had a hint of finality to it as he sent his message and brought his attention back to me, silence falling over us. After a few seconds, I couldn’t help but try to break it hoping he would let me go.

“Kenny’s probably going to get in trouble.”

“Yup. Sure is.” Still nothing. I tried again.

“Tweek sounded really jumpy, is he alright?” 

“Doesn’t like fights. He’s fine.” As I was about to start my third attempt I heard sneakers skidding down the hall. 

Kyle came sliding into view as he sharply turned the corner into our hall. Sometime between this morning and now he had lost his hat and as he approached his curls looked wild.

“What…happened?” The red head wheezed, placing hands on his knees. At our silence he glanced up, taking in my face and Craig’s grip on me. Quickly letting go, Craig faced his friend.

“Some guys were pushing her around-”

“It was nothing-”

“Kenny had to punch one of them-”

“They’ve just been giving me a hard time, it’s not serious-”

“They called her a slut and a whore and then insinuated they were going to ‘use’ her.”

My frustration was growing as I glared at Craig, his dumb neutral expression still firmly the same as it always was. Who the hell was he to tell Kyle all of this? I already said I had it handled.

“She said they’ve been at it longer than just today.” Craig continued telling the events to Kyle who was growing more and more red with anger. He gave the taller boy a nod, an indication to leave them, before he stepped directly into my space.

“How long?”

“What do you mean? I hated playing stupid but I felt caught in the act, embarrassment climbing up my limbs. 

“How long have they been bothering you?” His sharp tone didn’t help matters.

I stayed silent, eyes dropping to my scuffed up shoes. I heard Kyle sigh and without looking I could almost see him standing there with creased brows and a pinch to his nose.

“Y/N…I need you to talk to me here. Tell me something, anything, please? ” He didn’t sound irritated like I was expecting, but instead just really concerned. Picking at my nails, I quietly answered him.

“When people started talking about…it, they made a few comments, just words. The pushing didn’t start until last week.” I kept my head low, shame tingling my insides. I felt pathetic, to be honest, standing here struggling to talk about what I just called ‘not a big deal.’

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“...I-” I choked on the words, eyes beginning to burn. What was I supposed to tell him? That I started believing the things they spouted at me? That I felt it was all rightfully deserved so I didn’t even try to stop it?

“Do you not trust me or something?” The slight crack when he said that had my gaze snapping up to his face.

Since that day in the locker room, Kyle had been nothing but kind with me, even if I felt he had a reason not to be. He’d been supportive and attentive, and all I wanted to do was help him out as well. To do that I pushed him away, and because of that I failed.

“I didn’t want you to worry anymore than you already have been. I…feel bad taking up your time.” The words hung between us. Somewhere down another hallway a classroom door slammed shut, breaking the quiet. Kyle looked thoughtful for a second, his eyes breaking away from mine for just a moment. Then he brought his hands up and set them onto my shoulders, their weight grounding.

“It’s my job now to worry about you-”

“Just because I’m carrying your child-”

“ Both of you. ” Kyle cut me off, giving me a stern look. “I want to know about these things, Y/N, regardless of whatever you think. I don’t need you deciding what I can and can’t handle. I got this.”

“...Alright.” I felt like a scolded child standing there in front of him.

“Alright? I don’t want you to think I don’t care about things like this. I need you to understand that.” Rubbing his hands along my arms, he gave a small smile.

Warm. I felt entirely too warm with him so close and touching me like this. Lightly, I shimmied out of his hands and awkwardly laughed.

“Glad we got that sorted.” My eyes once again found their way to my feet when I realized where we were. “How did you get out of class?”

With a sheepish look Kyle bounced his eyes to the nearby lockers and shuffled his feet. 

“I…might’ve just ran right out.” The imagery of that gave me a giggle, quickly bringing his eyes back to mine. “I don’t particularly want to go back anyway…we could just walk around and wait for the bell?”

I studied Kyle for a moment. This was a star student, a boy who cared about all the things he did whether it be school or sports, even the weird shit his friends got up to. There were things he didn’t do and one of those was outright skipping. Yet here he was, having abruptly left his own class and was now technically ‘skipping’ because of me.  

The fluttery feeling that gave me stayed the entire day.

Chapter Text

3rd person POV

Kyle was starting to feel like a creep. A horrible, lecherous creep.

He had found Y/N quite pretty and very sweet, and that was more than enough to keep her on his mind. As of late though, his eyes began to wander, little things about her coming to his attention much more than before. For starters, everything about her was incredibly soft. The curves that she was unable to hide under sweaters and jackets drew his gaze more than once and he had a need to feel the smooth skin he was only able to catch glimpses of. She was expressive even when she wasn’t talking to anyone, and his eyes kept locking onto her in those small moments he was sure she wouldn’t notice. It was a bit of a surprise to him that he hadn’t already harbored a slight crush on her before, but Kyle supposed with how things were now it wasn’t quite a big deal.

But changes were coming, changes Kenny just had to point out. 

Y/N had been sitting with his crew at lunch for a few weeks in an attempt to get her more comfortable. After that whole issue Craig brought to him, he was sure as hell going to make sure she had others to help her. As she got up to grab something to drink, Kenny decided it was time for a change of subject.

“Jesus christ dude! Congrats on the knockers!”

“What?” Kenny only looked at Kyle with a knowing grin, the silver cavity near the back shining. 

“Her tits? They’re bigger!”  Kyle only stared wide eyed at the blond boy, making him huff. “You seriously can’t tell me you haven’t noticed. You guys see it, right?”

Uncomfortable murmurs of agreement were heard around the table, eyelines dragging themselves down and away from the pair. Kyle felt a small spark of irritation at his friends, the feeling already starting to twist his insides uneasily. 

“What? No, they haven’t- and stop being a goddamn perve, dude!” 

“Well, uh…” Kyle’s eyes swiveled over to Stan who wore a sheepish smile. “It’s kind of true…I mean that’s what kind of happens when…y’know?”

“When a milf is created!” Spreading out his arms, Kenny appeared as though he were describing the wonders of the universe and its mysteries, bringing out a few chuckles.

“What are you guys talking about?” Gazes automatically rested onto the tabletop as Y/N sat back down. Curiously, she glances around before looking to Kyle for an answer.

“Nothing,” Kyle felt the tips of his ears warm, Kenny’s words worming their way into his brain, “nothing you need to know.”

The school heating only worked when it decided to, and that day it was blasting. More than a few students shed their usual winter gear in order to keep from overheating. When he first spotted Y/N dropping her large coat and jacket into her locker he felt his eyes nearly bug out of his skull. The black top was form-fitting in a way that he normally didn’t see on her, the slight V neck dropping down enough to show a bit of collar bone- stop. Jesus christ man, it's her neck. Nothing special.  

However, berating himself still did not stop his eyes from traveling downwards to her chest. With a flush, he averted his gaze. Kenny was…on to something, he could admit that. He was a little embarrassed  that out of all his friends he wasn’t the one to notice first. After all he did spend a decent amount of time with Y/N, time he came to enjoy more than his weekly guy’s nights at Cartman’s. 

As Y/N finished fishing books out of her locker, he noticed one last thing he wasn’t expecting. With the fit of her shirt it was very clear that there was a bit more of a curve to her stomach than he remembered. A small, but still very visible, bump.

Changes were inevitable with the baby growing, their baby growing. He had seen pregnant women before and he was aware that eventually Y/N would look very similar. What he wasn’t expecting was how this sort of change was going to make him feel along with his ever growing attraction for the girl.

Something about seeing something so physical as proof that they had done things made him feel happy and excited and just really weird . Kyle couldn’t remember anything from that night and it was something that ate at him on the inside. It was her first time and while he hoped it was at least enjoyable he also knew it would be impossible to ever know. And now she was stuck with him.

Y/N deserved so much, and he had already fucked it up majorly. And now he couldn’t stop ogling her, not just her chest, but all of her. What in the hell was he going to do?

Y/N POV

I felt gross. It was one thing to be sick all the time, but with the amount of things I was shoving down my throat due to cravings I was also quickly gaining weight.

This is normal. It’s what’s supposed to happen. But unfortunately I had to deal with having the most vain older sister in existence. In all her skinny glory, she had taken forever to actually show when she herself was pregnant and took every opportunity to bring it up whenever she visited. My own small bump was bigger than hers was at 16 weeks, a point she made with her most recent visit causing me to constantly wear anything large and baggy. I even had to steal a few of my fathers shirts, but even those ran out eventually.

What made this feeling worse was that Kyle kept staring, eyes drilling into me whenever he occupied the same space. It got worse right before laundry, having to wear the only shirt I had left that hid nothing from prying eyes. I knew it didn’t matter, but a small voice in my head kept asking, could he tell I gained weight? Did it bother him? Why was he always looking at me?

It wasn’t like I could avoid him to get away from the issue either.

Recently, the spark of a crush that I had on Kyle had begun to grow out of control, a wildfire blazing within my chest every time we spoke. Everything about him had my belly doing Olympic level acrobatics, from his smile to him reaching down to tie his damn shoes. I nearly drooled watching those hands of his writing down our assignments the other day.

Hormones, my mother laughed. Nothing to do about it, she had said. She was of no help and it was pissing me off.

Anger was another side effect of this whole situation, my temper flaring in the span it took one to blink. Home became a bit of a battlefield with how often I snapped at either parent. Despite their grace in handling me, everyone had their limits and harsh words were exchanged, usually leading to angry tears later on. Thankfully, I had kept this side of things under wraps around Kyle, god only knows that he would make of all of it.

“So you understand it now?” Kyle had been explaining some algebraic equation, but all I could focus on was the fact that his arm was leaned onto mine, heat blooming where we connected.

“Yeah, I sure do.” I, in fact, did not understand.

Kyle at least had also seemed out of it, tripping over his own words multiple times. His shoulders had been tensed up since the moment we sat at his dining table, books spread in front of us.

He was about to sit back and away from me when a growl sounded within the quiet room. Oh fuck me. Blushing, I glanced up to see a shyly smiling Kyle.

“Sorry…”

“It’s alright!” chuckling, he got up and strode towards the kitchen, “I didn’t realize how late it’s gotten, I didn’t mean to make you go hungry.”

“Oh! No, you don’t have to-”

“You two need to eat! Is there anything you want? We have…carrot sticks, some sugar free cookies…” I could hear him rattling off food as he searched cupboards. 

It was sweet, really, and I did appreciate what he was doing. However, just as it had been these last few weeks, another symptom of my affliction was showing face. My mouth watered as a thought entered my brain but I kept my mouth firmly shut.

“Anything sound good to you?” Kyle observed as I hesitated, an eyebrow quirked up.

“...I kind of want something else…” biting my lip, I tried not to feel embarrassed. Over the last few weeks I had dealt with odd cravings often making my parents laugh before complying to my strange requests. I really didn’t want to share that with the boy in front of me, but my body was practically begging. “It’s weird, but you know, like, a hot dog, right?”

“...you want a hot dog?”

“No! I mean, no…like, you know how you can have all those fixings with a hotdog? Ketchup, mustard, onions, bun and all?” As I talked I couldn’t help getting a little excited at the image I had in my mind, “I want that but with a pickle in the bun instead!”

At the sound of his laughter my eyes shot up. Leaning against the doorframe Kyle had a hand to his mouth, his eyes scrunched up in mirth.

“That’s… that is a little weird, yeah,” more laughter burst forth as he hunched over a bit, “I was nearly expecting something about ice cream!”

What the hell was that supposed to mean? Shame melted, leaving another sort of heat bubbling in my chest, quickly overflowing and taking over. Kyle didn’t seem to notice the change in mood, continuing to giggle to himself. It wasn’t until I began to pack my back that he realized he made a misstep.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, what’s up?” take a few large steps over to the table he held up his hand in surrender, “I didn’t mean anything by it, Y/N.”

“Y’know, I’m already feeling shitty in general, so I figured at the very least I could eat without feeling so fucking bad about it!” angrily, I zipped my bag before facing him, “You really felt the need to say something? I know about my weight, Kyle, I’m not blind.”

“Wait, what? I didn’t- I wasn’t-” Kyle’s eyes grew wide with panic as I jabbed a finger into his chest.

“ Then why the fuck did you expect me to say something about icecream? ” I knew as the words left me it was ridiculous, but my mouth had a mind of its own and I could do little to stop it. Rage filled tears clouded my vision. “I’m leaving.”

3rd person POV

Kyle wasn’t sure what just happened. 

It had been such a nice afternoon and within seconds it all went to shit. Y/N had been a bit touchy lately, but this felt way more extreme. He didn’t even do anything, he just tried to help! Sighing, he sat back down at the table and ran a hand down his face.

Things would be fine, she just needed a little time to cool down.

Kyle’s short walk to Cartman’s meant he had a little time to ponder things. Even angry Y/N was extremely pretty, her eyes shined with life he hadn’t seen before and it felt entirely new to see that side of her. For lack of a better term, it would’ve been hot if it wasn’t directed at him. He just felt bad that he somehow said something to offend her to that point. They had already made so much progress, and after everything he really couldn’t afford to lose it.

Maybe he could talk to Stan or Kenny about it tonight. They were sure to have some sort of advice he could at least partly use. Walking into the house, Kyle made a mental note to once again remind Cartman about locking his door when he encountered a nervous looking Stan.

“Hey dude!” Stan stood from the couch and Kyle immediately clocked him wringing his hands. “So uh…Y/N is here.”

“....Y/N is here. At Cartman’s house.”

“In the kitchen, actually.” Stan winced as laughter sounded from the aforementioned room, one voice distinctly Y/N’s.

Lightly pushing Stan aside, Kyle made his way in. For some reason the thought of her  and Cartman in the same room together made his body buzz unpleasantly. Stepping into the kitchen he was greeted with quite the sight.

Seated at a rather cluttered table was Cartman, Kenny, and Y/N sat right in the middle of them. All three had stopped their conversation at the appearance of the newcomer, looking like thieves caught in the act.

“Y/N?” she at least had the wherewithal to look ashamed at the call of her name, keeping her head down. Cartman just looked bored.

“Seems you can’t feed your girl, Broflovksi. What a shame, what a shame.” the fat boy clicked his tongue. “Gotta say, shaming her for that pickle dog idea was cold.”

“It’s hella good too!” Kenny piped in holding up a plate. Kyle recognized it as it was just what Y/N had described just hours before. Looking back at the girl he was surprised to see a sheen of tears in her eyes, arms wrapped tightly around herself in an attempt to be smaller. Before he could put his foot in his mouth any more than he already had, he turned and stalked back toward Stan, the demand for an explanation already on his lips.

“She messaged Cartman online, something about him possibly understanding food better than you,” Stan sighed, plopping himself down on the couch, “Ken said she was super pissed when she got here and then she just started bawling, dude.”

That made Kyle’s heart drop. He knew she was upset but to that extent? On top of that was that Y/N even felt the need to go to that fat ass of all people. At that thought a heavy hand rested on his shoulder.

“Hard to hear you failed, isn’t it?” Cartman’s voice only ignited the fuse for Kyle.

“Shut the fuck up, you don’t even know anything!” he fumed. Cartman just looked vaguely amused at the outburst.

“First rule of dealing with pregnant chicks Kahl, is never, ever disagree with them. Especially about cravings.” At the other two’s twin looks of confusion, he elaborated. “My bitch of a cousin got knocked up last year and mom forced me to visit with her. You learn quickly.”

Kyle looked at him through squinted eyes. It would be like him to spew some bullshit for fun but for once he sounded like he actually knew something.

“She also thinks you called her fat with that little ice cream comment. I covered for you but that’s the last time. Deal with her mood swings yourself, Jew.”

Understanding dawned on Kyle then. He knew about mood swings, having done his own research. He lost count of the bookmarks he saved on various websites, things he felt he needed to know just in case something happened, things he felt would make him ready for the adventure ahead. He recalled some articles over hormones and how all over the place they could be, but he had not realized how extreme those might be.

“...Thanks, man.” The words felt foreign to Kyle, saying them to the large boy in front of him. “And uh, thanks for looking out for her, I guess.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatevah. You’re just lucky her cravings actually sound pretty kickass,” Cartman huffed, lumbering away with Kyle and Stan following suit.

Kenny had taken the opportunity while they were having their discussion to cheer Y/N up, his entire mouth filled to the brim with some sort of gummy candy. As he attempted to say something that Kyle could only barely tell was inappropriate she was giggling away, her light tinkle of laughter going straight to Kyle’s heart. 

He would fix things with her any way that he could. After all, if he’s going to actually get a girl like Y/N to want to be with him, not just feel like she’s stuck, he has to put in the work.

Snow crunched underfoot as the two teens made their way home in silence. The early December air was crisp but not entirely unpleasant, wind every so often whipping around the trees.

“I want you to know I didn’t mean anything by what I said earlier,” Kyle kept his hands in his pockets, resisting the twitch he felt to reach out and grab the gloved hand beside him. “I didn’t realize my words might hurt you, and I’m sorry for that.”

“...It’s not your fault, Kyle,” Y/N slowed her steps, glancing over to the tall red head, “It’s just…hormones. They’ve been going crazy lately and sometimes I don’t know if I’m going to be mad or upset, and it’s always at things that don’t even matter! I hate it!”

“Hey, it’s normal though, right? Nothing wrong with that!” Kyle chuckled lightly, hoping to keep the girl beside him calm. He thought for a moment before turning to her. “If you have any other cravings, weird or not, tell me. Call me in the middle of the night if you have to and I’ll grab it.”

“Excuse me?” 

“I just mean- ugh, I just want you to know that I’m going to support you. I want you to be happy and comfortable, and if that means running to grab things from the store or making things I might not necessarily eat, I will.” By now the walking had ceased and  he was now looking directly at Y/N. She hesitated, mouth opening and closing as though she didn’t know how to say what she needed to.

“I just…I don’t want you to be disgusted with me or anything,” her gloved fingers gripped tightly to the edge of her coat, anxieties beginning to walk along her nerves. “I know I was never exactly the smallest to begin with, but I just feel like I’ve been gaining a lot and it’s making me feel-”

“I like it.”

Kyle looked mortified as the words burst forth from his mouth, a dark blush appearing on his pale cheeks. It wasn’t a lie, he certainly did like that she had “a little meat on her” as he had heard his friends mention once or twice, but he didn’t exactly want her to know that. Y/N cocked her head to the side and waited.

“I mean, you looked fine before and you look fine now,” clearing his throat, he worded himself carefully, “and if you weren’t gaining anything I’d be worried. Baby needs to grow, right?”

The girl in front of him merely nodded, but a small smile told him he made the right choice. Once again the two started to move down the sidewalk in tandem, the bubble of quiet descending upon them once more. 

Once he got Y/N safely into her own home, the gears in Kyle’s head turned. They were almost halfway into things now, and the other half was sure to pass in the blink of an eye. He’d have to use his time carefully if he was going to woo her. 

And jesus he was going to need a lot of help.