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“Hey! Get off of me!” She screamed, thrashing about, but nothing she did would loosen their grips. They were merciless as they dragged her down the hall, throwing her alone into an isolation room.
She wanted to punch the walls. She wanted to smash the windows. She wanted to scream until her throat bled.
But when the door slammed shut, locking her in, she knew none of that would do her any good.
“Why…” she began in a trembling voice, staring down at the floor as tears formed in her eyes, “Why me…?”
Her life was in shambles. Her parents were terrified of her; she’d been carted off to this wretched hospital; she’d gotten into a fight with a roommate; and now she was locked up in here for being a danger to the other patients.
She cried out, hoping someone would hear, but her cries echoed out into nothingness. She banged on the door, wishing someone would answer. What did she do to deserve this?
“Why me…?” She repeated again. Slumping down on the floor, she curled up into a ball. Her whole body was shaking, and she could hardly breathe between sobs. She didn’t deserve any of this…
But what could she do now?
Now that the hospital staff saw her as a vicious beast, nothing could sway their minds.
God, why did she have to keep running her life further into the ground?
*****
“Hello…?” A gentle voice echoed from beyond the door.
Slowly, the door creaked open.
“What is it?” Lana asked coldly, lifting her head to see the person who’d entered. It was the intern who’d recently begun working at the hospital. The girl was close to Lana’s age, with deep red hair and enchanting green eyes. A small, soothing smile appeared upon her lips.
Lana quickly averted her gaze; she couldn’t look this girl in the eye after she’d made a goddamn fool of herself.
“I wanted to bring you something,” the intern said, slowly approaching. She carefully knelt down and pulled a small bag out of her pocket, handing it to Lana, “I figured you’re probably hungry by now, so I brought you some cookies.”
Lana looked at the bag of cookies in disbelief. “Why are you doing this for me?“
“Because you deserve it,” the intern said gently, “You’re a person, just like me; you deserve to be treated with kindness.”
It was only then that Lana looked up at the girl. Her soft smile and emerald green eyes were so full of sincerity and kindness… things Lana knew she didn’t deserve.
Her eyes then flicked over to the girl’s name tag. Reading it, she found the girl’s name.
Nurse Julie.
“Thank you,” she said, a small smile slipping across her lips, “I appreciate it, Julie.”
She had the feeling she was going to like this girl.
*****
The two women apprehensively stood at the entrance of the abandoned hospital, hesitating.
“Julie, are you sure about this?” Lana asked, “We don’t have to go in if you’re uncomfortable. I know this place probably brings up a lot of bad memories—“
“I’m sure about this,” Julie said quickly, “I need to know what’s been going on in here.”
“If you insist,” Lana conceded, “I just… I don’t want you having to relive the memories of what happened here. I know it’s probably a lot for you.”
Julie took a breath, looking Lana in the eyes. “Trust me, Lana… it’ll be alright. I know everything’s been a lot for me… but I can manage. Don’t worry about me.”
“I trust you, Julie,” Lana assured her softly, “I just… I want to look out for you the best I can. I’m sure none of this has been easy…”
“No. Nothing’s been easy,” Julie admitted, “But I can’t be afraid. I need to keep moving forwards, even if it pains me. Now let’s head inside. We need to investigate.”
Lana worriedly followed the former nurse inside. Ever since being freed, Julie had struggled a lot. It was still taking Julie time to adjust to everything, even months later. Admittedly, Lana couldn’t help but feel worried about her. Even though Julie seemed to be in a far better spot mentally compared to when they’d first reunited a few months ago, it was clear that she was still taking time to recover.
Honestly, Lana felt horrible for everything that had happened to Julie. As much as Julie insisted she wasn’t to blame, she knew this was all her fault; she was the reason everyone around her had to suffer. First her parents, then Lina, now Julie.
God, her life was cursed.
Lana didn’t want Julie to have to go through anymore troubles; the poor girl had been through enough already.
Yet Julie still insisted upon delving further into this mess. Lana honestly couldn’t believe just how brave Julie was to put herself through all this.
God, if only Lana had even a hint of that courage.
Looking around, Lana was shocked to find the hospital in so much disarray. Sure, it was never the nicest place even while it was still in operation. But now… with shattered glass all over the floor, with dilapidated walls, the flickering lights, and with torn furniture strewn all over… it looked like it was ripped straight out of a horror movie.
“You really did all this…?” Lana asked in a trembling voice. She’d known Agamemnon had turned Julie into a monster, but one so violent…?
Julie nodded, carefully placing a hand on the wall. “Yes… this was all my doing. I did this…” she closed her eyes, clearly troubled by the memory.
“Julie, are you alright?” Lana asked quickly, “We can leave if you’d like—“
“No,” Julie cut in, opening her eyes, “We need to keep going. We need to know if it’s truly who we think it is.”
Julie stuck out a hand, motioning for Lana to take it. “Besides, I know my way around here. Let’s stick together, okay?”
Lana nodded, taking hold of Julie’s hand. “Alright then. Lead the way.”
The two began making their way through the building, exploring each of the dark corridors. Lana felt uneasy wandering through these halls. They were so similar to how she remembered them, yet they were tainted by all the years they’d sat in decay. At some points she was even sure she spotted dried blood staining the carpet, and she shivered thinking of the carnage Julie had caused.
Julie just kept her gaze straightforward, refusing to linger on the destruction she’d caused. God, when that girl was on a mission, she was relentless.
Over the past few weeks, there’d been reports of a squatter being spotted around the premises. While squatters in abandoned buildings weren’t really a big deal, it was the physical description of this particular squatter that had Julie so concerned. She had the feeling she knew exactly who it was, and wanted to visit so she could confirm her suspicions.
As the two ascended a flight of stairs, Lana honestly dreaded what would happen if it truly was the person she suspected it was. She both hated and felt bad for this person at the same time. She wanted to rip them apart, yet she also wanted to apologize to them.
God, why was her heart so torn in half?
Lana tried to reassure herself that she was just mistaken; maybe it was just an ordinary person camping out in here.
But she had to know for sure; she couldn’t take any risks with this. Maybe it was just a random innocent person. Or maybe it truly was who they suspected it may be…
The two kept wandering the hallways, exploring every nook and cranny they could find. Each hallway held even more destruction than the last. Julie was clearly growing uneasy, as Lana could feel Julie’s hand tremble in her own, but Julie still didn’t let it show on her face. The determined look remained in her eyes, despite the fear she surely felt.
God, she was braver than Lana could ever dream of being.
The two wandered about the desolate hallways, hand-in-hand until they approached the entrance to the medical wing, where Julie stopped in her tracks. Following Julie’s gaze, Lana’s eyes landed on a truly gruesome sight: a pale, lifeless body laid on the floor in front of them. There were scratch marks on its face and neck, its limbs were outstretched in desperation, its form was mutilated beyond recognition, and all around it lay dried crimson blood splattered across the carpet.
Julie let go of Lana’s hand, placing it on her chest as she stepped back.
“Julie…?” Lana asked in concern. She’d had the feeling this place would bring up unpleasant memories… but seeing a sight as brutal as this?
“No… no…” Julie murmured in a trembling voice, covering her mouth with her hands, “I couldn’t have… no…!”
She kept inching away, yet continued to grow increasingly distressed as she kept looking down at the carnage before her.
Lana tried to take hold of her girlfriend’s hand again. Giving it a gentle squeeze, she whispered, “Julie, it’s okay. This isn’t your fault.”
But these words did little to console Julie. She tugged at her hair and shut her eyes. “I killed someone… I fucking killed someone, just as I feared. I killed someone.”
Lana had no clue what to say or do; she didn’t know what would calm Julie down. Yet she had to try regardless; she wanted to help.
“Maybe we should go,” Lana suggested carefully, “Maybe we should investigate another time, when you’re feeling more ready.”
Part of Lana honestly hoped Julie would give up on this little quest of hers. Honestly, Lana didn’t want to face the possibility of facing that person…
But Julie had fallen too far into panic for Lana’s words to reach her ears. She tore her hand out of Lana’s and approached the lifeless corpse. Kneeling down, she ran a finger along its face, inspecting its pained expression.
“I killed an innocent person…” she murmured, shivering at the touch of ice-cold skin, “I took an innocent person’s life. I’m a monster… I’m a fucking monster…”
“You’re not a monster,” Lana assured her, stepping forth to join her side, “None of this was your fault. I promise, you’re not a monster. Please, don’t call yourself that.”
“I’m a fucking monster…” Julie went on, head low as tears streamed down her cheeks, “God, why do I deserve to live when I’ve caused nothing but destruction?”
“Julie, it’s okay—“
Lana tried to reach out and comfort the poor girl.
But before Lana could even get close, Julie got up and ran off in a fit of tears.
“Julie, wait!”
Lana tried to chase after her, but to no avail; the girl turned a corner, and then was seemingly gone, leaving Lana standing alone in the hallway.
Lana didn’t know what to think. She didn’t know how she was supposed to comfort Julie after seeing a sight like that; sure, both she and Julie had suffered by Agamemnon’s hands, but their stories were nothing alike. Lana had been through hell and back just to escape Agamemnon’s grasp, but the people she loved suffered far worse fates than she ever did.
Her parents had been turned into that ferocious two-headed creature, and even after they returned to normal, they were still afraid of her, scared they’d become that creature again.
Lina had ended up working with Agamemnon in an effort to evade the consequences that came with being close with Lana.
Even Serena’s fucking soul had been taken under Agamemnon’s control.
Everyone around her suffered.
And Julie got the worst of it. She’d been turned into a monster, one far more merciless than the one Lana’s parents had ever been. A monster that killed with no mercy, sparing none…
Lana fell to her knees; this was all her fault! She should’ve known better. She knew that Agamemnon wrecked the lives of anyone close to her. If she hadn’t let herself fall in love with Julie in the first place, none of this would’ve ever happened!
God, why did she keep ruining everyone’s lives?
Tears burned hot in her eyes. She didn’t deserve to live on if she did nothing but make everyone suffer.
But what was she supposed to do about any of it now? It was far too late to change anything. Everyone she loved had already been afflicted with pain they didn’t deserve, and Lana couldn’t do a thing about it.
Lana fell to the floor, violently sobbing. Why did this all have to happen? What did anyone do to deserve this?
She wished she had some way to take away the suffering she’d caused, but there was no erasing the past.
All this pain was permanently inked in the hearts of those she loved the most.
“I see this little trip down memory lane has become a little too much for you,” came a voice from behind her.
Lana turned around, immediately recognizing the voice.
Her heart nearly stopped as she laid eyes on the girl she’d been dreading to see.
It was Lina.
She appeared just as Julie had described a few weeks ago. She appeared just as the recent reports of a squatter had described.
The person who’d been spotted on the hospital’s premises was exactly who Lana had feared it was.
“What are you doing here?!” Lana demanded in a whirl of anger, “What could you possibly want from this place?!”
“Why, all I needed was a place to stay, and this hospital was vacant, so I took it,” Lina explained, lifting her hat to reveal glowing red eyes beneath its shadow, “Now what are you doing here? Isn’t this place a tad bit traumatic to you?”
“I only came here because Julie insisted,” Lana told the woman bitterly, honestly wishing she’d just leave her be, “You should be asking Julie, not me.”
“Oh, I’ve tried speaking with Julie already,” Lina said, “And she proved to be uncooperative.” She knelt down and placed a finger under Lana’s chin, “Besides, I never really wanted to speak to that little girlfriend of yours anyways. The person I truly wished to speak to was you.”
“I don’t want to speak with you,” Lana hissed, swatting Lina’s hand away. She didn’t want to deal with this right now… why did she have to run into Lina of all people?
“And why not?” Lina asked, “I’ve done nothing but try to help you.”
“You tried to sacrifice my soul.”
“That would’ve been a favor for you, honestly,” Lina said, “You’d be far happier if you stopped fighting back and just gave into Agamemnon’s demands for once. It’s honestly not that big of an ask.”
“He’s forced the ones I love to suffer all because I wouldn’t give into him,” Lana argued, and her heart stung a little as she added, “You even suffered because of my choices.“
“There would be no suffering if you had just accepted your fate in the first place.”
“I was a child when he started going after me!” Lana screamed, “Do you seriously expect an actual child to give themself up to a literal demon?!”
“Well, I was still a child when I gave into him,” Lana told her, “I wasn’t much younger than you, yet even I was willing to accept his conditions. Why couldn’t you have done the same?”
“Because I actually give a shit about my own well-being!” Lana screamed in Lina’s face, “All he wanted was for me to be alone so I would choose him! The only reason you were willing to put up with him was because you didn’t want to end up like everyone else I knew. Isn’t that right, Lina? The only reason you’re doing this is for your own selfish purposes.”
“In that case, you’re selfish too,” Lina said coldly, “I mean, you did nothing but sit there and watch as everyone you loved turned into monsters, all because you couldn’t sacrifice your own well-being.
To be fair, Lina did have a point. She and Lina weren’t so different; all they were both doing was for their own personal benefit.
Honestly, Lana hated seeing the vicious woman Lina had become. When they were both teenagers, sure, Lina was annoying as hell. But she didn’t deserve this… Lana hated knowing that it was her who pushed Lina down this path.
God, Lana ruined everyone’s lives. Even the lives of those she hated.
“I’m sorry…” Lana said, nearly in a whisper, “I truly am… I’m sorry…”
“It’s too late for apologies,” Lina told her sharply, “You did nothing when the ones you loved turned into monsters, all because you were too stubborn to give in.”
Maybe that was true. Maybe Lana had been too stubborn.
But who wouldn’t have been in her situation?
“You’re not innocent either,” Lana argued, “You aided in Agamemnon’s plans. If you thought your little conversation with Julie would remain a secret, then you’re gravely mistaken. She told me everything when we got home that evening. Including how you helped turn her into a monster.”
“I only did it because that was what Agamemnon wanted. Nothing more,” Lina said in a low voice.
“You ruined her entire life…” Lana droned on, “She may be free now, but she’s lost the entire life she had before. It’s taken her forever to get used to everything again, and even still, every day is a constant struggle for her.”
“It’s only a struggle because you refused to do what was right.”
Maybe it would’ve been the right choice to give into what Agamemnon wanted. Maybe if she had made things easy, then no one would’ve had to suffer.
But why did it have to be that way? Why did everyone’s lives have to hinge on her choices?
“Why…” Lana asked slowly, “Why her? Why did you have to ruin her life? She didn’t deserve it. I deserved to suffer… not her.”
“Because she was precious to you,” Lina said, “We both know that. You loved her, and Agamemnon knew that losing someone like her would be just the push you needed down the right path. Besides, it’s not like I had any other choice. If it wasn’t her, it would’ve been me.”
“What do you mean…?”
“I loved you,” Lina finally said, placing her hand in Lana’s, “And deep down, I still do…”
“I’m taken,” Lana growled, tearing her hands out of Lina’s.
“Oh, I know,” Lina said simply, “I’m perfectly aware that you and that little nurse are dating. But all those years ago, before the two of you even knew the other felt the same, I wanted nothing more than to be with you.”
Her voice grew soft as she added, “Honestly, I could’ve very well been in Julie’s place if not for my choice of aiding Agamemnon.”
Lana couldn’t believe her ears. “So instead you chose to inflict pain upon Julie? An innocent person who never even asked for any of this?!”
“I had to. I had no other choice,” Lina insisted, “That’s what you’re not getting. If she hadn’t been torn out of your life, then it would’ve been the next person who loved you, which was me. Do you not understand that?!”
“Oh, I understand that bright and clear. I get that you didn’t want to suffer because of me. But was it worth ruining the life of one of your friends?!” Tears slid down her cheeks, fresh against her skin. She couldn’t take this anymore; she didn’t understand why everything had to be so unfair!
“Well maybe I was just scared,” Lina said coldly, “I know that Julie was able to sacrifice herself because she loved you, but I could never bring myself to do the same. I was a coward, okay?! And maybe I thought that with Julie out of the picture, maybe for once I would be allowed to love you…”
“For the last time, I’m taken!” Lana snarled, “Now leave me alone, do you hear me?! Leave me alone!” She was straight up crying now, wishing that this conversation would finally end; she couldn’t stand looking Lina in the eyes any longer.
“Or what?” Asked Lina curiously.
Without thinking, Lana picked up a broken shard of glass from the ground, and in the blur of her emotions, drove it straight into Lina’s hand.
“Leave,” she repeated through gritted teeth, “Now.”
Lina just looked down at her hand, watching with a mix of fury and amusement as blood trickled along her skin.
“Damn,” the woman mustered, “Shame you don’t have the guts to actually kill me.”
“Maybe I don’t have the guts to kill you,” Lana said, her words sharp as knives, “But that’s because I actually have a heart. Unlike some people.”
Lina just smiled dubiously, pulling the shard of glass out of her hand, “Why, maybe you do still care for me, deep down…”
“I’m fucking taken. Now LEAVE.”
Lina sighed. “Fine then. I’ll leave you be for now, but only because you insist. Just please remember that not everyone is as brave as your little sex toy.”
And with a dramatic flip of her cape, she disappeared into the darkness down the hall.
Lana took a moment to recollect her thoughts. God, she wished she could take back everything that had happened. She wished she could’ve prevented things from getting to this point…
But it was far too late for that. She was stuck living in a world where she’d shattered everyone lives, and now she had to clean up the broken pieces.
Lana tried to relax; sure, her encounter with Lina had been stressful, but she had other things to worry about now: she had to find where Julie had run off to.
Prying herself off the floor, she wandered through the hallways, she wondered where Julie would’ve gone. Her first thought was the nurse’s former office, so she raced down the halls to the respective room.
Carefully stepping inside, she began. “Julie? Are you in here?”
She hoped that this was where Julie had fled off to, but alas, nobody was there; not a single soul was inside that room.
Lana wandered around the room, looking around a little bit. Partly to occupy herself while she thought of where else Julie could’ve gone, but also partly because she was curious to have a peak at the office. After all, Lana had never gotten the chance to see it before; she’d barely even been allowed on the second floor. Admittedly, she was a bit curious to see how Julie had her space set up.
There wasn’t much of shock inside the office. Mostly standard stuff for an office.
But then she stopped by Julie’s desk. On the wall behind it hung a picture that Lana immediately recognized.
It was a photo she’d taken with Julie during her stay, hung up right on Julie’s wall.
Lana placed a finger on the paper, running her hand along its smooth surface.
The fact that one of the few decorations in here was a photo of the two of them showed that Lana truly meant the world to Julie…
That was when it clicked in Lana’s brain where else Julie would’ve gone.
Immediately, Lana darted back out into the hall and made her way down the stairs. Practically sprinting through the hallways, she finally reached her old room.
Carefully, Lana creaked the door open.
“Julie…?” She asked slowly, stepping inside.
“Lana…” came the strangled response. On the bed sat Julie, who was tearfully looking through some photos on Lana’s old camera.
“I was wondering where you ran off to,” Lana started, sitting beside Julie, “Are you alright? I was worried about you.”
“No,” Julie said quietly, holding back a cry, “I just… I hate the monster Agamemnon turned me into. And part of me is still afraid I’ll turn back into it…”
She sniffled, frantically wiping away her tears as she continued, “All I wanted was to keep you safe. And yet… sometimes I find myself regretting that decision. I know it was the right thing to do, but I still feel horrible about it… I mean, I’ve killed so many… that body we saw was only one of the countless lives I’ve stolen. Lives that I can never bring back.”
“You made the right decision,” Lana reassured her, embracing the girl tight in her arms, “You were brave for being willing to sacrifice your own life for me.”
“I was far from brave,” Julie cried, “I was terrified, Lana. I was terrified of what He was going to do to me…”
“The fact that you were afraid makes you all the more brave, Julie. The fact that you were willing to make that choice regardless of how scared you were is honestly heroic. You’re far braver than you give yourself credit for. I sure as hell wouldn’t have done the same. Most others I know wouldn’t have, either.”
“Oh, Lana,” Julie whispered, burying herself deep in Lana’s arms, “You don’t need to lie to me. I wasn’t brave by any means.”
“But it’s true,” Lana said softly, “You had the courage that I never had.”
Julie just kept weeping into Lana’s shoulder, shakily saying, “Oh, I really love you, Lana, I really do. I couldn’t ask for a kinder soul to be my girlfriend.”
“And I love you too,” Lana said, giving her girlfriend a small kiss, “And nothing will ever make my feelings sway.”
The two shared a loving embrace for awhile, treasuring a few minutes when it was just them and no one else.
And once Julie had calmed down a bit, Lana finally suggested, “How about we start heading out of here? I think today’s been a little much for both of us.”
Julie nodded. “That’s probably a good idea. I’m sorry I ruined everything. I shouldn’t have freaked out like that.”
“You have nothing to apologize for, Julie,” Lana assured her, “You’re allowed to feel however you want. Besides, I already got the situation handled.”
“Really? You did?” Julie asked, surprised, “What happened while I was gone?”
“I’ll explain everything once we both have time to wind down,” Lana said.
“Awww, now I’m curious,” Julie teased, “I want to know what happened.”
“When we’re home,” Lana insisted, “Neither of us are in a good mental state right now.”
“Fair enough,” Julie said, still fiddling with the camera in her hands, “By the way, can I take the camera with me? It still seems to be in working condition. Maybe we could take photos on it, just like old times.”
Lana shrugged. “Sure, I don’t see why not. While we’re here—“ she stepped towards her bedside table, picking up a small notebook, “I might as well take this journal with me.”
“Damn, we’re both sentimental, aren’t we?” Julie asked, “Clinging onto old objects from our past.”
“I mean, why not?” Asked Lana, placing an arm around her girlfriend’s shoulder as the two of them left the room, “Might as well hold onto the memories.”
“True, true.”
And as they made their way back to the exit, the two finally began to brighten up. Sure, it had been a tense day for them, but they’d gotten through it together.
*****
“I brought the body out into the hallway, just as you asked,” Nelly said, climbing over an old couch when Lina entered the medical wing, “How did it go?”
“Not terribly,” Lina admitted, “It split the two apart as I guessed it would, though Lana was still difficult to get through to, as usual.”
“Damn,” Nelly muttered, rolling her eyes, “Of course she was.”
“At least we don’t have to hang out in this dump anymore,” Lina added.
“Finally!” Nelly exclaimed, “It took weeks for people to even notice we were hanging out around here. It’s gonna take at least another decade to gain Lana’s trust at the rate we’re going!”
“I know,” Lina said with an annoyed sigh, “But it’ll all be worth it in the end. I’ll make that girl suffer, no matter how long it takes…”