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Adam was rearranging his nest once again; it had to be the fourth time this month. He would like and tell himself he didn't know why he was doing it but he knew good and well why.
Lucifer.
That stupid short-ass motherfucker. Giving him presents and his time. Checking on him and making sure he was doing okay. Paying more attention to him than almost anyone other than his flock of exterminators up in heaven had in millennia.
He hated his guts. That wasn't true.
He picked up the plush eagle that Lucifer had given him a few months ago. It had been the first of many stuffed animals Lucifer had given him; the king taking his love of comfort items seriously. The asshole.
He hugged it tightly for a moment before setting it in it's new spot. He scowled at his nest, tempted to just throw a fit and wreck the thing before remaking it into a smaller nest fit for just him and his fat ass.
Why was he expanding anyway! Sure Lucifer slept over sometimes, they'd agreed to be flockmates after all, but the short ass always just slept on him anyways, like Adam was no better than some fluffy stuffed animal himself!
It was infuriating! So so…. He flopped down face first in the nest and screamed.
Lucifer knocked on the door once, but it was rather perfunctory because he entered immediately after without waiting for a response. He hesitated when he saw Adam apparently screaming into the nest and approached cautiously. “Adam…? Are you okay…?” he called out, a plate of pancakes in his hands as he watched the sinner.
Adam stopped screaming and rolled over “ugh I'm fine. What do you want?” He asked grumpily though spied the food in his hands he reached out making baby grabby hands.
Lucifer relaxed when Adam reached for the food, and he made his way quickly to the nest, kneeling down and passing the sinner the plate. “Here, I made these for you…” he said softly. He loved watching Adam eat.
Adam eagerly took the plate and dug in moaning at the taste, “It's not ribs but you are a damn fine chef Luci.” He said savoring the pancakes; between him that creepy ass deer, Adam hadn't eaten so good in all of time.
Lucifer preened slightly, shifting closer to sit thigh-to-thigh with Adam. “Oh, really?” he asked, eyes glowing as he gazed up at the fallen first man. “I’m glad…I like seeing you so happy…” he said more gently.
Adam blushed but stuffed his face to avoid speaking his wing curling around the king fuck fuck stupid little damnit!
His heart raced in his chest why was he doing this to him!
Lucifer beamed, snuggling against Adam’s side and just basking in his company. He loved when Adam was like this, when he was so soft and affectionate…a bit bratty. Lucifer almost swooned. He so wanted to ply this man with every ounce of affection he could get away with. When he loved he loved with everything that he was, most found it smothering, but he just had so much love to give…!
Adam finished his food and set the plate aside outside of the nest. He felt Lucifer get comfortable in his side and, physically, it was great, like the little devil belonged nowhere else, but in his mind it was… painful. It was almost like they were cuddling again in Eden.
His wings twitched and he grit his teeth. It was all so confusing and frustrating! He couldn't think straight like this!
“Okay, okay, that's enough” Adam declared and got up suddenly leaving the nest to sit outside of it and look inward at Lucifer “We need to talk.” He frowned seriously.
Lucifer flinched, but didn’t resist as Adam got up and moved away from him, only watching with wide eyes. He shifted his seat awkwardly before nodding. “Y-yes, of course…” he replied weakly, tilting his head, eyes searching Adam’s face. He deflated slightly. “About…Eden…?”
Adam nodded “Yes, about Eden.” He puffed up his feathers before shaking himself and manually putting them back down. “L-look I admit these past few months, they've been… great. Better than great really. I've eaten better than before. I can admit the company is nice and you really… make me feel like I have a home, a real home. This place feels like I have goals and things to work towards again. Working the garden, helping everyone with their pets; it's like this life outside of violence is all that I've been missing, but…” He looked at his lap.
“That's what Eden was like too.” And Eden had been temporary so temporary compared to forever.
Lucifer leaned a little closer, eyes on Adam’s face as he listened attentively. He frowned slightly, hands curling to fists on his knees and he averted his eyes when Adam mentioned Eden. Guilt curdled in his gut, sour in his throat. He licked his lips, mind racing. After a moment he looked back towards Adam. “It…wasn’t ever supposed to end…” he said weakly. “You-you and Lilith were supposed to…to stay. In Eden. And…be happy.”
His shoulders hunched and he buried his face in his hands. “And I ruined that…and I’ll always regret what I did to you…what I allowed to happen to you…” he lifted his face, gazing at Adam with haunted eyes. “But don’t think for one moment that I never loved you, that I ever stopped loving you…” he said softly.
“Then why did you do it? Why did you take her away? Why couldn't you have just told me what I was doing wrong? Wasn't I capable of doing better? Was leaving the only option?!” He asked, voice rising, “-and then you come back? Only to what? Give my second wife; my Eve, that cursed apple! She suffered. I suffered so much for it, and where were you?! Living it up, down here?! Then I'm dead and I don't even know where anyone went! I was alone! Alone for so long! That's what happened to me! And that's when I was new; when I was good; now I'm this sorry sack of shit with even less reasons to stick around. What if it happens again?! I can't do it Lucifer, I couldn't take it!”
Lucifer flinched back from the rancor and pain in Adam’s voice, the haunted look in his own golden eyes. He clutched his hands to his chest, wishing with every particle of his being that the could go back and do things over. But that was not possible…and would be cowardly besides.
He had to fix what they had now, and he had to do it now.
“I-it…was…a series of tragic misunderstandings at first.” he began weakly, but he sat up straighter, keeping his gaze on Adam’s. “I…loved you, and I loved Lilith. You were both made to rule…so you butt heads…more than we expected. You were supposed to be a team…but Lilith wanted to lead; I was never supposed to intervene like I did. That…that just gave Lilith a taste for…domination. She liked being in power over…anyone really…and she made it…she said I was bothering you. That…that you didn't want to see me anymore…so I began spending more time with her…and…you got…angry with her…? I don’t know, she said she was scared of you, and she wanted to leave Eden…it wasn’t safe! It wasn’t finished and she’d die! And you would be safe in Eden…so I went with her…and-” he choked and averted his eyes. He closed his eyes, memories flashing through his mind.
“We ate the apple so that we could leave…and…it wasn’t as bad as we feared…” he trailed off again. He didn’t want to talk about this…it hurt so much. He took a breath and continued. “We…heard about Eve…we went back…we…wanted you both to be able to…to choose. To…not be merely puppets for the angels’ whims…” he whispered. He flinched at the memory, the echos of pains long past flaring along his wingbeds.
“You…you weren’t willing…you ate the apple under coercion…so-so you weren’t really…released from their control…” he added softly. He slowly lifted his gaze to Adam’s face. He let his glamour drop; showing how tired he was, how much pain he was in after all this time.
“I never had a chance to…fix anything. The Seraphim took us away, they tore off my wings…they threw us out of Heaven. We fell….fell for ages…for so long that my wings healed and regrew. Lilith held me…I was unconscious for a good portion of the fall…and then we neared the bottom…I knew she’d never survive the impact…I took all of it onto myself…” he gazed at his ruined hands, spreading his fingers wide before curing them into fists.
“I shattered…I don’t know how long it took me to reassemble…” he sighed. “But by then…Lilith had set up the monarchy and…was ruling over what was now Hell. Ruling…like she’d always wanted. Like she was born to do. Me-” he gave a bitter, broken laugh. “Angels don’t adapt very well. We are created for one purpose…I was not created to rule and even now I’ve never adapted to do so…” he closed his eyes, falling back to fold his arms over his eyes.
Adam stared down at the little devil on the floor, the fallen angel, and really he just felt the steam blow out of him. He sighed and leaned forward, laying in his crossed arms, “By the time you woke up from the fall I’d probably been long dead and gone huh?” He sighed.
He played over his memories and even recent events. He could admit how a lot of his problems were his own fault, the modern ones at least and he'd blamed them all on the little guy before him.
Yet Lucifer had really tried to make life better for him back then and even now too. Even while carrying the guilt and the stress of being here in a world he didn't understand and was unable to adapt to.
He'd been around angels most of his existence; he knew how hard change was in them. To hear Lucifer talk he knew it must be miserable to be a king when it wasn't your purpose.
“So. I guess I'm here then. And there's no Lilith whispering in your ear and no heaven to take me away so… does that mean you won't be leaving me again if I make this nest big enough for the both of us? Permanently.” He asked, finally feeling something settle in him.
Lucifer hummed noncommittally as Adam settled next to him, shifting to lean into his warm bulk, but not uncovering his eyes as Adam worked things out to himself. He nodded slightly when he was addressed, but otherwise just laid there as Adam came to his conclusions. Said conclusions had him sitting up with a startled chirp, staring down at Adam in astonishment. His mind raced to catch up to Adam’s intentions. His wings had even popped out, he was so startled.
“Eh? Us? Together?” he stammered, face flushing gold as his eyes darted from Adam’s face to the nest and back. His wings had furled around himself; clearly in need of preening. He looked uncertain for a moment, but really, this was what he’d always wanted, he’d be stupid not to grab it in both hands.
So he did.
He threw himself on Adam, clutching the front of his robe with both hands before slamming their mouths together, whining desperately as he started kissing the first man like he’d longed to do back in Eden.
Adam grunted as he was suddenly squished by the tiny devil king and gasped into the kiss.
He guessed that was a ‘yes’ he wrapped his arms around Lucifer, being careful of his wings, and pulled him close, kissing back passionately. Lucifer may have gotten the jump on him but Adam would make sure it was the best damn kiss the short king ever had.
From now on he'd make sure to move forward without hesitation. Yesterday was over and he'd move forward now with his little bird here in
their
nest.