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The Gotham Academy Cupids thought differently when it came to the matter of having crushes.
Long gone were the days when two lovebirds would sit on opposite sides of the class looking longingly towards each other, neither of them making a single move because of their incessant fear of being rejected and, god forbid, being told no.
Twice a month, once school started, they would meet up at the leader's house to create the next scheme to bring a couple together.
This all started years ago, back when hippies were a thing and everyone believed in soulmates and the destined fate to be with your one true lover. This wasn’t a group that was stuck in the past, lost to time as the members graduated because when the group graduated, they logically passed down the torch on to the future generations, who did so again and again and again, all because as cynical as the modern generation might be when it comes to the position of finding true love, they all love a good love story.
And which better love story is there than high school sweethearts?
As the years passed, the GAC grew far bigger than the group of a couple of friends in a basement.
They were a collection of bookworms, artists, and secretly romantic jocks who were just bored enough to agree to join this team who underwent the ritual vow of secrecy and prestige as a Cupid in order to preserve the sanctity of finding true love. They were a group of almost 50, meeting up in the dark hours in the basements of its presidents as a raging party existed upstairs. They concealed their every move and operated with utmost competence. Even the slightest mistake could lead to disaster as 50 years of couples would realize the manipulation, lies, and deceit that came with their love.
The rare few that found out (and quickly silenced) would say they were twisting fate’s hands. But all is fair in love and war. What is a little nudge in the grand scheme of things? Wasn’t it all good if they were making people happy? Just look at the 79% rate of successful high school sweethearts from Gotham Academy since 1974. Who would really complain?
As Gotham Academy transitions into its new year, the previous senior GAC members have passed on the torch and have elected Roseanne and Emery to guide the future generation of Cupids.
And Roseanne is finally, finally, on top. Considering the time that she’s invested in this, she’s earned it.
Roseanne spends the last few strands of summer flipping through her yearbook from the previous year as she lay on her bed.
She’s in her bedroom, with Emery sitting close by on her swivel chair. The rays of the afternoon sun go through her baby pink curtains and into the room around her. The colours in her room are quite childish, she admits, with hues of pink and purple and white all around her.
She chose this palette when she was 10 and hasn’t changed it since. Red, pink, and purple encapsulates all she stands for. Romantic, girly, royalty.
Her mother though…
She just doesn’t understand her. She’s been nagging her to go more neutral with her choices and aesthetics because it's “unbecoming of someone so high in society to act like this. All frilly with bows and lace, half your closet is dresses and skirts. You need to act more mature for your age.”
Change your dress, you look five.
Stick your head up Roseanne, you aren’t a slob.
Stop being such a child, Roseanne.
“Sad beige mom” doesn’t even begin to describe her mother.
She turns her attention back to the school’s yearbook. Rows of students in alphabetical order arranged by their grade. It’s a big book, with collections of the last year’s memories, letters from their peers and deans, and all of the students in Gotham Academy.
There is an entire page of Juniors and Seniors that just look sad. More in the way they hold themselves, rather than they actually look. She knows these kids, they all trudge their way through their parents expectations and their school work without a smile, lonely as that one shirt that no one likes at the bottom of the closet. She knows that feeling.
But of course, there is only one possible reason why they look like that. The reason why she’s doing all of this research and planning. They are without love! Last year’s presidents clearly didn’t do a good job. Half of the school didn’t even have a date to prom last year. The presidents are supposed to ensure that everyone under them is competent and ready for the task. The president is supposed to pick up the slack or control the rest of the members to follow their lead if they don’t do enough.
Emilia and Patty picked her and Emery to succeed them because they knew they had done a shitty job. (Though she would never say this out loud lest she be crucified by the rest of them)
They had plenty of other patsies that they could’ve sent the role down to but they gave it to Roseanne so this whole thing doesn’t crumble down, burning some bridges in the process.
Now, the GAC is amazing for networking once you’re out of college but without the support of a good leader, this organization crumbles. Forget all of the future opportunities and the support of close friends, if the Cupids break, it’s all gone.
There's also the genuine part of caring about the wellbeing and love life of others to ensure that they have a happy and successful life, but most of these people value the networking just as much.
All that being said, she (and Emery) really need to look competent to the rest of the Cupids. Emilia and Patty were dunces and the rest of the Cupids have lost their trust in the group. Emery and Roseanne need to pull this whole stunt together.
Roseanne chews the top of her pen, thinking over some of the names in the yearbook, debating if there were any good matches for any of them. This was always the part she hated most and the only reason why she needed Emery here with her.
Maybe Eleanor Berkley? She spent the entirety of last year complaining about the fact that she didn’t have a boyfriend and that her parents were getting on her ass about it. She seemed pretty interested in the Smyth boy on the soccer team though, that might be an option…
Roseanne looks over and Emery is scrolling on her phone.
Emery can pick together a pair in a snap of her fingers. She knows everyone and their business. It’s honestly quite helpful as much as she hates admitting it. The only way Cupids can find their matches is by either stalking online to see if they’ve dropped some hints or by stalking in person to see how they react around everyone and to grab every piece of gossip.
Roseanne hates doing this but Emery thrives off it.
“Hey Emery, what about Eleanor and Dylan?” Roseanne says absent-mindedly as she writes the names in her notebook under ‘Possible Matches’ in purple gel pen. It's a frilly red notebook that Emery had gotten for her as a joke that Roseanne uses for all of her GAC planning.
“Which Eleanor?” Emery puts her phone down on the desk and looks to Rosy. “Berkley or Hunt? ‘Cause it makes a difference.”
“Berkley.”
“Rosy,” she sighs. “You’ve got to be kidding me.” She looks at her with an incredulousness that she wasn't expecting.
“What?”
“She's gay. You saw her with her tongue down Miranda’s throat behind the-”
“That was her?” Roseanne interrupts.
“And we haven’t matched her with anyone because her parents are homophobic dipshits.” There was a hint (or a bucket full) of disappointment in Emery's tone.
“Really? I thought she liked Dylan?” Roseanne could’ve sworn that she heard rumors about them. She isn't great at keeping track but she doesn't suck!
“It's a ruse for their parents.” That… makes sense. Gotham elite parents want to look as painfully normal as possible and if these kids kill every instant of love and want them to get that, they’ll accept it. (Not that Roseanne knows anything about this.)
Nevertheless, it isn't normal for Roseanne to forget such things. She needs to step up her game. She quickly jots this into her notebook. The stress must be getting to her; she’s failing at the most basic knowledge about her entire job.
“How do you know this?”
“Eavesdropping in the library.” Emery shrugs.
Roseanne frantically tries to erase the pairing out of her notebook before remembering that it's a pen. “I give up." She turns around and looks at Em. “Please tell me you have another idea because I don’t anymore.” She’s been thinking about this since June. They need to show perfection to the GAC and she’s not bringing those good ideas to the table.
Emery sighs as she shuts off her phone and turns the swivel chair around so that she can look at Rosy properly. “Roseanne, your problem is that you keep looking in the superficial places. No one is just gonna tell a random stranger online who their crush is, you've got to dig deeper.” She says in a serious tone.
“It’s just so time consuming,” Rosy groans. “Just keeping up with the drama takes forever and trying to dig between the lines takes so much thinking. I don't have that much brain power.” She sits up on her bed, “Tell me, Miss Investigation, who should we pair?”
“You’ve got to stop forcing the idea. Love comes when it wants to without a care in the world. We’ll figure it out, just trust.” Emery, just give a straight answer for god’s sake!
“That’s not an answer.” Roseanne sighs.
Emery sighs as she puts her long flowy hair up in a ponytail. It's quiet in the room, filled with only the sound of Roseanne nervously chewing on her pen and their subtle breathing. A clock in the corner of the room ticks, waiting. Suddenly at 12, the cuckoo bird chimes from the grandfather clock Roseanne’s mother inherited from her aunt, and Emery stands up with a new idea. “What about Josh and Kimmy?” Emery says, making a good observation. “They've been making sweetheart eyes since middle school.”
They tried to get them together years ago, back when Roseanne and Emery were simple Cupid recruits, with little success. If they try again… they might be able to finish what they started. “Emery,” Roseanne says exasperated, “I hate it when you say something with actual, logical sense.”