Chapter Text
I used to love solitude. The quiet. The peace it brings. I could sit alone in silence forever. That's how I used to feel. But when the option to be surrounded by people and sound is completely removed, I now resent the solitude I once craved. I can’t choose to find some fake excuse as to why I don’t want to go out for a drink with friends. No pretending I have better things to do, when in reality we all knew I didn’t. I’ve never wished for company before. Not even to talk, just someone else's presence. Someone alive at least, someone conscious and understanding. I spent my whole life wishing to be alone, and now that I am, company doesn’t sound so bad at the end of the world.
The view on the bridge is beautiful, the sun low. It should be setting soon. I’ve been coming here everyday that I could for the last 8 months, after everything fell and the world went to shit.
But I think I’m finally ready.
I slowly climb up on top of the railing, hugging the cold metal pillar as the wind blows lightly through my mousy brown hair, pushing it into my face. Looking down, the water used to be mostly clear, but has now turned this muddy brownish green color. I used to love this bridge, what a fitting place for me to go.
“So you’re just going to jump?”
A voice. Not a grunt or a groan or growl from the creatures that have taken my loved ones and many others away from them. I don’t turn around. This can’t be real.
“I know the world has gone to shit but you shouldn’t do this.” The voice says. Gentle, understanding in his tone. I must really be losing it for my subconscious to make me hear things to go back on this decision. I sway a bit with the wind, my grip lightening on the pillar. I hear a shuffle behind me on the pavement. I should do this before it’s too late.
“Please!” it’s breathy almost like a loud whisper. Like my subconscious knows not to yell, to refrain from grabbing the attention of anything that could be lurking on this bridge with me. “Don’t do this.” He sounds as desperate as I feel. Might as well indulge myself.
I don't know why but I can't stop myself from responding. “Why? What else is there to stick around for? A cure? Someone to come save me? No one is coming. So I’m gonna do myself a favor and take myself out of the equation before I get taken out by something else. I wanna still be me when I go.” I say it harshly, still not turning around. If there were people around I would worry about looking crazy. But there aren’t.
Then I feel it. Warmth. This is real. He climbs up onto the railing next to me, his arm behind me to grab onto the pillar I'm wrapped around, to steady himself. I finally look up. He’s tall. Black hair, and brown eyes that shine like honey in the setting sun. and beauty mark under his left eye.
“Well then I’m not letting you do this alone.” he shocks me to my core. He’s a stranger, and he’s gonna throw away his life on a whim?
“No. You need to go, the sun is setting. Take my bag, there's food, water and other supplies.” if he was smart he’d leave, save himself. Once it’s dark out there's no telling how chaotic they’ll be tonight.
He shakes his head, black hair shaking with the movement, falling lightly into his eyes.
“You think I want to go through this either? This world? And alone at that?” He’s been alone too? I mean why am I surprised. If I've been alone all this time I’m sure others would be, I just kind of convinced myself there was no one left. “No thank you. So, if you insist on jumping, be my guest, but you’re gonna have some company. Or we can walk off this bridge and find some shelter for the night.”
He startles me, his hand on my cheek wiping tears I didn’t know I had been shedding. His touch is gentle and warm, alive. I take a deep breath, looking into his eyes. I haven’t seen eyes like his in so long, eyes with life and fear and affection. Seconds pass, our eyes locked with one another, the warmth of his hand the only thing keeping me tethered to reality. I nod and we carefully come down off of the railing. His hands on my waist as he supports me coming down. I pick up my bag, I had thrown it next to an abandoned car, and we start walking. He walks slightly in front of me, guiding us, and It’s silent for a moment.
“Why?” I finally ask. He doesn’t turn to look at me.
“Why not?” He says it like he’s trying to make me laugh. Before I can give him a reaction, he sighs and stops to turn and look at me.
“I’ve been alone too. Maybe I did it because I’m selfish… Maybe I also did it because we can be alone, Together.” With no other words and no space to wait for my response, he turns around and keeps walking. We continue to walk in silence. It’s comfortable, like all this weight on my chest has been lifted off and I can breathe. His words sit on my mind and for the first time in months I seriously consider the idea that maybe, there are still living breathing people around. Maybe we just keep missing each other.
“I’m Hyunjin, by the way.”