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Chapter Text

The chill of the night seemed to get into his soul. Howard was tired. So fucking tired of everything.

He raised the glass to his lips and took another sip of his bourbon, letting the alcohol warm him up a little. He considered going inside to get a coat, but ultimately couldn’t be bothered. These days he couldn’t muster much energy for anything. There was nothing but work and headaches in his life, and he hated it.

Sometimes he wondered how he’d gotten to this point. How he’d gone from the somewhat optimistic and enthusiastic young man he had once been to this bitter old fool. He’d had hopes and dreams, he’d had faith. Now… It seemed like everything was one step forward and three steps back. The SI motto of old, “better living through technology”, had fallen by the wayside as more and more of the company was dedicated to weapons and military technology. It wasn’t that he didn’t think such things were important, but there were other things. Things that wouldn’t make him dream of blood and death.

Christ, there was so much blood on his hands…

So absorbed was he in his morose thoughts that Howard startled when the door to the balcony opened and a disheveled Maria grabbed his arm.

“What? What’s wrong?” Howard asked. Maria was not the sort to panic, so this had to be something serious. And he could only think of one thing that would make her this frantic. “Tony?” His voice shook with fear.

“Jarvis called. The house was broken into. Tony’s gone.”

“Gone,” Howard repeated, unable to process the information. Oh god.

“Howard, we need to go,” she urged.

Shaking his head to try to get his brain to restart, Howard followed his wife into the bedroom and hastily began dressing as Maria did the same.

“Did Jarvis call the police?” he asked.

“Yes, of course. And Peggy Carter. He said they were on their way.”

“But Tony is… he’s gone. He’s missing.”

“Yes, that’s what he said.”

Missing was good. Missing wasn’t dead. Missing meant a kidnapping. It wasn’t the first time it had happened, and Howard comforted himself with the thought that Tony was more valuable to whoever had taken him alive than dead. Also, Tony wasn’t an idiot. The last time he’d been kidnapped, he’d managed to get himself out without any help, and he’d been only 13.

As soon as he was relatively decent, he told Maria to finish getting their things while he settled their departure with the hotel and arranged a cab to drive them to the airstrip. He also asked for some strong coffee to counter a bit of the alcohol he’d had. Thank god he hadn’t drank all that much, so he was still able to fly. It would have been a nightmare to have to arrange quick transportation otherwise.

It still took far too long in Howard’s estimation for them to arrive back in New York. He and Maria had barely said ten words to each other since leaving the hotel. There was nothing to say really, not until they had more information. He couldn’t help the feeling of dread spreading through him, though. The timing was too suspicious.

Speculating without data wasn’t going to get him anywhere, though, so he tried to focus on the flight. At least he had something else to direct his attention to; Maria had no such escape. How she didn’t crumble with nerves, Howard didn’t know.

Please let Tony be all right, he prayed, though to whom he couldn’t say. Anyone who would listen would be good enough, he thought. Just let him be all right.

Once the plane had touched down, they quickly got out, not even bothering to retrieve their suitcases. They could get someone else to come get them later. What mattered was getting home as fast as possible.

They saw the flashing lights from a distance. When the taxi pulled into the driveway of the mansion, several cops came over immediately to keep the car from going further. Howard shoved several bills at the cab driver and got out, Maria on his heels.

“I want to speak to whoever is in charge here,” Howards told the uniformed cop.

“Sir, you can’t–”

“I’m Howard Stark. This is my house, and I understand my son is missing. So I want to talk to whoever is in charge. Now.”

That lit a fire under the young officer’s ass, and he quickly got the detective on scene to come talk to Howard and Maria.

“Mr Stark,” the man said. “I’m detective Lipton.”

“Where’s my son? What’s being done to find him?” Howard said, not in the mood to be nice.

“We’re still trying to piece together what happened. It appears that the security cameras were disabled and the alarm was tampered with.”

Fuck, Howard thought. That was not good. His security was state of the art, he’d designed it himself. If someone was able to bypass it, that meant they were well prepared and well equipped.

“I need to check it.” Howard started moving, Maria and the detective following him.

“Do you know of anyone who might have a grudge against you, Mr Stark?” Lipton asked.

Howard snorted. “I can name a couple of dozen off the top of my head. I’m a wealthy business man, detective, grudges come with the territory.” But most of those wouldn’t stoop to kidnapping his son – at least, he hoped not.

“Has anyone made any threats against you or your family?”

Howard thought of the dozens of letters he had on his safe, all promising death and ruin for him and his family. Usually he didn’t take those seriously; sometimes people just wanted to vent, and thought anonymous letters were the way to do it. Now, though… could one of those people have actually decided to act?

Or was it something else? Something to do with SHIELD, perhaps. Again he was reminded of the prototype serum he had delivered to the Pentagon earlier today. But if that was what they were after, it didn’t make any sense to kidnap Tony after he’d handed the serum over.

“I’ll give you a list. But I want to check my security first.”

They found Jarvis talking to Peggy in the entrance hall, while police officers took pictures and dusted the house for fingerprints.

“Sir! Ma’am.” Jarvis looked somewhat disheveled, which was highly unusual.

“Howard, we need to talk,” Peggy said, but Howard kept his gaze on Jarvis. He needed information first.

“What happened?”

Jarvis twitched, hands wringing in a nervous gesture Howard had rarely seen. “After lunch, I went out. I had some errands to run. Master Tony was working in his bedroom. When I came back late afternoon… I didn’t immediately see anything wrong, because I entered through the kitchen. It was only when I went into the foyer that I saw the mess. I ran straight for his room, but young Sir wasn’t there. I looked everywhere and couldn’t find any trace of him, so I called the police, Ms Carter and you.”

“Did you check the vault?” Howard asked. “Was something missing?”

“It was locked, no sign of it being tampered with. I didn’t go inside.” Jarvis looked down. “I found… I found some blood.”

“Where? How much?” Maria was on edge, Howard knew. She was keeping it together for now, but sooner or later she was going to lose it. Howard was pretty sure he would too.

“We’ve sent the blood for analysis, Mrs Stark,” Lipton asked. “It could be your son’s, or it could be from the kidnapper. Do you keep any weapons in the house, Mr Stark?”

Howard snorted again. “I’m a weapons manufacturer, detective, so yes, I do.”

“Can your son use a gun?”

“Yes, of course.”

“I’d like you to check if all your weapons are accounted for.”

Still ignoring a rather impatient Peggy, Howard led the group to his study, where he found that the two guns he had were still there, locked in their respective drawers. He also checked his safe, and reported that nothing had been taken. If the vault seemed untouched, it was likely that everything was still there too, though Howard would have to check later (he didn’t want anyone nosing around in there). It was looking more likely that this had really been a kidnapping rather than a robbery.

Next Howard went to his workshop, from where he could access all security for the house. It took him a bit of time to restart the system – it had definitely been sabotaged – and see what the cameras might have picked up. The outside cameras had been disabled, as Lipton had already told him, so there was nothing there. The cameras near the front door and the kitchen door had also been destroyed, and the alarm disabled, though Howard wasn’t sure how just yet. He would have to run a full diagnostic later, go over every inch of his system to check for breaches and weaknesses.

There were, however, cameras inside the house, which fed into a different system, so they were fine. After a few minutes of looking through the images, he hit the jackpot. A man dressed all in black could be clearly seen entering the house and heading straight for the workshop. And that was when he ran into Tony, who seemed to be just walking about the house.

Tony’s eyes widened when he saw the intruder, and dodged just in time as the man simply pulled a gun out of a side holster and shot at him.

“Oh, my god!” Maria cried, hands going to her mouth.

Howard was frozen for a moment, then scrambled to find more footage when Tony and the unknown man moved out of the frame.

There wasn’t much more he could get, unfortunately, since the inner cameras only covered a small portion of the house, but it seemed clear that the intruder hadn’t planned on kidnapping Tony. It was still unclear what his plan had been, though. Robbery, perhaps. It was possible that Tony’s presence had interrupted him before he could get whatever he had been after.

“What happened to Tony? Where is he?” Maria’s voice was strained and trembling slightly.

No one had an answer for that.

Howard could only shake his head, impotent fury and fear churning in his stomach.

This bastard had shot at his son, had chased him around and… Had he found Tony? If so, where was the body? (No, don’t think about that. Tony was a smart kid, he knew the house and the neighborhood, he could have gotten away. He had to.)

“Can you get us a copy of the tape, Mr Stark?” Lipton asked. “We’ll see if we can identify the attacker.”

Howard pulled up the images again, searching for a clear view of the man’s face. It wasn’t easy, with the mask that obscured half of it. There was something familiar about him, Howard thought, but he couldn’t put his finger on what. Maybe it was someone he had pissed off; there was certainly no shortage of those.

“Howard, we really need to talk,” Peggy said again, jaw clenched tight.

“In a moment,” he replied, still working on getting a better shot of the criminal.

“There,” Maria said, pointing at the screen. Howard paused the video and went back, and there it was. The mask was still in the way, but the upper half of the man’s face – especially his eyes – was clearly visible.

“Fuck,” Howard breathed, unable to believe his eyes.

“Do you know this man, Mr Stark?” Lipton’s shrewd gaze was locked on Howard.

“I don’t… No. I mean, it can’t be.”

“Who is it, Howard?” Maria gripped the back of Howard’s chair.

He probably wouldn’t have even thought about it, except Howard had been looking at old pictures of the Howling Commandos a few weeks ago, after Morita’s funeral. One more old friend gone, Howard had thought. He’d been feeling maudlin enough to dig through the pictures he’d kept from the days of the war.

It wasn’t a time he liked to think about now, even though, in a terrible way, it had perhaps been one of the best times in his life. At least then Howard had known he was doing good (before the goddam bomb, of course). It had been a time of fear and worry, yet also an exhilarating one. He had been young and optimistic despite everything, and life hadn’t yet kicked him in the teeth quite so often.

“Howard!” Maria’s voice brought him back to the present, and he turned to Peggy.

“It looks like Barnes,” he said, and she startled, leaning over his shoulder to look at the screen more closely.

“Impossible. He died 50 years ago.”

His body had never been found, though; it had been lost in the Alps. There was a slim possibility that he could have survived, but… he looked like he hadn’t aged a day, and that was impossible.

Lipton frowned. “Who is that?”

“A friend,” Howard said. “Killed in the war – or so we thought.”

“Well, he certainly doesn’t look like he was in a war 50 years ago. He looks 30 tops.”

Howard nodded, unable to contradict that statement. “Yeah, I know. It’s just… Weird, I guess.” He shook his head. “We can find out more about him later. Right now I want to know what he did to Tony.”

“I assure, Mr Stark, we’re going to do everything we can to get your son back safely,” Lipton said. “With your permission, we’re going to tap your phone, in case someone calls for a ransom.”

“Yes, of course.”

“And if you could get us a list of possible suspects, that would be helpful.”

Howard nodded, and shared a helpless look with his wife.

He got to work.

*****

Howard collapsed into his chair with a heavy sigh. He hated that there was nothing more he could do to find his son. Even though he knew he shouldn’t, he poured himself a generous shot of whisky and cursed himself for being so weak. Useless, that was what he was. His son was missing, possibly dead, and he was here, drinking. As if that would make anything better.

The police was still in the house to monitor the phone, though the chances of a ransom call were slim, in Howard’s opinion. As much as he didn’t want to think about it, there was a high probability that Tony was dead. Assassination might not have been the goal, but the attacker obviously hadn’t wanted to leave a witness.

Fuck.

The door opened with no warning, and Peggy strode inside as if she owned the place.

Once, many years ago, Howard would have said he and Peggy were close. Howard didn’t have many friends, so he had cherished those few that he had – and he had counted Peggy as one of them. However, over the years, they had drifted apart more and more. Howard wasn’t sure how it had started or why, but over time he had begun to feel uncomfortable around Peggy. Or, more accurately, around SHIELD. The organization that he had helped build had changed, and he wasn’t sure he liked those changes. He had never been directly involved with the day-to-day running of it – he’d left that to Peggy and Phillips – his focus had been on technology. After Phillips had died, Peggy had taken over completely, and Howard saw less and less of her. It seemed that the only time she came to see him was when she needed something – or perhaps it would be more accurate to say she only came to demand something. He’d made allowances because he knew she had to be under a lot of stress, but it grated. Howard had a great deal on his plate too, between the company, the constant requirements for his time and expertise from the army and SHIELD, and his family. None of that seemed to matter to Peggy, though. She sometimes acted as if he did nothing all day, as if he should be at her beck and call at all times.

So he had begun to distance himself from her and from SHIELD. He had realized in the last few years that something had to give or he would lose his shit completely (he wasn’t sure he hadn’t already, sometimes), and SHIELD was the thing he had chosen to let go of. Not only because it wasn’t his official job, but also (and more importantly) because he didn’t quite trust them anymore. Not since Janet Pym had been killed, and Hank had gone off the rails blaming everyone. While a lot of what the man had said had just been the grief talking, some of it had made Howard think that maybe there could be something there. Too many missions had been compromised in ways that were… suspicious. Hank had accused Howard of trying to steal his research, and while Howard hadn’t done it, he didn’t doubt that someone had. And Peggy hadn’t seemed concerned at all. She had dismissed Hank as overtly paranoid, and essentially told Howard to shut up when he had raised his concerns about a possible mole in the agency.

And now… there was just something off about Peggy’s demeanor. She had never really been the emotional type, but he would have expected her to show a little care for Tony – and for Howard himself. Perhaps all those years at SHIELD had slowly eroded her capacity for empathy. Howard would be the first to admit that he was not great with people beyond a superficial level, yet this… indifference… was grating. And, if he was being honest, it hurt. Tony was a child, and his well-being should have been Peggy’s priority, no matter how pissed she might be with Howard now. Howard was sure he would have been nicer to Peggy if it was one of her kids missing.

“What happened to the serum?” were the first words out of her mouth.

Not ‘how are you?’, not ‘we’re going to find your son’, not ‘let me know if there’s anything I can do to help’. No, it was… straight to business, as if his son’s blood wasn’t all over the living room.

“I delivered it,” he said through gritted teeth. “If you want to know more you’ll have to check with the Pentagon.” They probably should do that anyway. One more thing in his list of things to do. And one more thing that wasn’t likely to help him find his son.

“You should have given it straight to me,” she replied with that annoyed expression Howard had come to loathe.

“That’s not what we agreed,” he said, doing his best to keep a level head and not get into a screaming match with her. As satisfying as the thought might be, it wouldn’t do anything to actually help.

God, he was so tired of all of this.

Howard had never thought the serum was a good idea, but both SHIELD and the military refused to see the potential dangers of it. They were determined to create an army of super soldiers to fight… he didn’t even know who. The Commies? One hardly needed a super soldier for that, for crying out loud. The only reason Howard had agreed to keep working on it was because the serum had other uses, such as medical applications. Sure, a lot of diseases had been either cured or controlled since the war, yet there were plenty of others that were still devastating. Ana Jarvis had died of cancer a few years ago. Despite the best doctors money could buy, none of the treatments had been effective. Perhaps the serum might offer some hope in that.

“Damn it, Howard.”

Howard didn’t even know what she was complaining about now, and he realized that he’d had more than enough.

“If you’re not going to help find Tony, then you can leave, Peggy,” he told her, voice hard. “I don’t have time for whatever you’re going to accuse me of now.”

“I’m not accusing you of anything,” she replied with an eye roll, as if he was the crazy one. “I just want to make sure the serum won’t fall into the wrong hands.”

Howard gripped his glass hard and fought the urge to throw it at the wall – or at Peggy.

“I don’t give a fuck about the serum right now, Peggy. My only concern is my son,” he hissed. “I don’t know what happened to you, but right now I also don’t give a fuck about that. Get the hell out of my house and don’t come back. I’m resigning from SHIELD effective immediately. I want nothing to do with you or any of it anymore.”

If Tony had been killed because of the fucking serum… Fuck, Howard didn’t know what he was going to do. He just knew he needed to get away from it. He needed it all to stop.

He needed his son back. Please, god, let him be all right, he prayed again. While his parents had been religious, Howard had never given much credence to god or faith and considered himself agnostic. But if praying gave him his son back, he could become a believer.

Fuck. Whatever it took.  

“Howard,” Peggy began, a mixture of anger and pity in her expression.

“Get the hell out!” he shouted, standing up to get in her face. She could wipe the floor with him and he knew it, but he didn’t care right now. “Out!”

She clenched her jaw and nodded tightly. “All right. I know you’re worried. We can talk when you’re more rational. Once Tony is back home safely.”

Howard didn’t bother to repeat that he had resigned, so he would not be speaking to her again at all. Peggy tended to ignore the things she didn’t like, and Howard was just too tired to get into a fight at the moment. At least she had acknowledged Tony at last. That was something.

He accompanied her to the door to make sure she was really gone, then called Jarvis.

“Peggy isn’t welcome in this house anymore,” he said. “I don’t care what she says, she is not to come in again. Is that understood?”

“Has something happened?” Jarvis asked. He had a good relationship with Peggy, for the most part, though they had also drifted apart lately.

“I don’t trust SHIELD and I don’t trust Peggy. I don’t want them in the house.”

Jarvis nodded tightly, though he was clearly unhappy. “Do you think they had something to do with what happened to Master Tony?” Jarvis might like Peggy, but Tony would always be his priority.

“I don’t know, but it’s possible. Even if they didn’t, though, it’s only a matter of time before whatever crap they’re doing spills over to me and my family. It’s not worth it.”

“Very good, Sir.”

“Where’s Maria?”

“I convinced her to go upstairs and get some rest.”

Howard nodded. “Good. That’s good.”

“Perhaps you should go and join her, Sir. There’s nothing more we can do now. I’m sure the police is doing their best.”

It was on the tip of Howard’s tongue to argue, but… well, Jarvis was right. He had given the police all the information he had. Unless some new fact came to light, Howard had nothing with which to even begin to track Tony down. Maybe he could build some kind of tracker the kid could carry with him all the time; something discreet that potential kidnappers would overlook. It would made it easier to find Tony if he was ever kidnapped again.

“Sir?” Jarvis’s voice startled him, derailing the plans he was already making in his head. “You need to lay down and rest,” he pleaded. “I’ll wake you up in a couple of hours. Or if something happens.”

“Okay.” He wasn’t sure he’d be able to sleep with this dread hanging over his head, though. Still, he went up to his bedroom, and was surprised to find Maria lying on his bed. For the past year, they had been keeping separate bedrooms.

He knew their marriage was on shaky terms at the moment, which was one of the reasons Maria had insisted on a vacation.

“Hey,” he said softly. She wasn’t sleeping, just staring off into space.

“We’re going to get him back, aren’t we?” she asked, a slight tremor in her voice. This was not the first time they had been through this, yet it never got better.

He wanted to tell her yes, of course. He wanted to believe that Tony would be fine, yet the words refused to come.

“Come here,” she said, and he did.

They didn’t talk anymore, because there wasn’t much to say, just clung to each other silently.

Please let him be okay.

Chapter Text

Tony woke with a start, pain shooting down his left arm when he moved. He hissed and curled up on himself, trying to be quiet. After a few moments, Tony slowly began to move, sitting up in the small space he was currently occupying to take stock of his situation.

He wasn’t home. He was cold and hungry and seemed to ache everywhere.

He wasn’t home because he’d had to get away. And while he had occasionally fantasized about running away just to see what his father would do, this was nothing like those stupid little rebellious dreams. This was reality, and a shitty one at that – running off because of a gun pointed at his face was not what he’d had in mind.

He’d been doing just fine by himself, getting some work done on the coding for his helping robot. Then he’d gone to get a drink from the kitchen and everything had gone to hell.

He remembered the man who had broken into the house and shot at him, those dead eyes showing nothing but emptiness. Tony had been in danger before – he’d been kidnapped a few times, after all – but he’d never been so scared as when he had come face to face with that man. It had been obvious that there would be no talking to him, no negotiating or stalling. Tony’s AI interface, still incomplete as it was, had more humanity than the guy in the black mask. All Tony had been able to do was run. Run as far and as fast as he could.

Honestly, it was a miracle he’d managed to get away. When the gun had gone off, Tony had thought he was a dead man.

No, don’t think about that. I’m fine. I’m fine. Not dead. Not dead.

After a few moments to get himself calmed down (deep breaths, focus, it’s okay), Tony cautiously crept forward. He could see that morning had finally come. By now Jarvis would have noticed him missing, and would have called the police. He might even have called his parents, though whether his father would have bothered to show up was a different matter. He and his dad had argued, as usual, before his parents had left for their weekend getaway. It shouldn’t bother him – Tony was far too old to let things like that matter to him – but it always hurt. It always hurt that his father didn’t care, that nothing Tony ever did seemed to be good enough.

Tony shook his head and refocused. It didn’t matter if his dad cared or not – his mom and Jarvis did, at least. They would be worried. They would want him back.

Tony wanted to go home and sleep for a week.

He poked his head a bit outside his hidey-hole and had a look around. He couldn’t see the man anywhere, though of course that didn’t mean much. Still, it would be risky for an assassin to be out and about in the day time like this. There was no way that guy wouldn’t stick out like a sore thumb now. The black clothes and the mask were no doubt good for sneaking around in the dark, but it wasn’t dark anymore, and the police would be all over the neighborhood looking for Tony. His father might not like him all that much, but Tony was the only heir he had, so he couldn’t just ignore his disappearance. Not this time, anyway. Not when the house probably looked a mess and Tony’s blood had been left behind.

The wound on his arm, where one of the shots had grazed him, had stopped bleeding sometime last night. It still throbbed painfully, as did the twisted ankle Tony had sustained in his mad dash out of the house. Fuck. This was not how Tony had wanted his evening to go.

Once Tony was relatively sure that there was no one around, he crawled out of his hiding place. His right foot was a bit swollen and Tony could hardly stand to put any weight on it. Getting back home was going to be a pain – literally.

Unfortunately, there was no other option. He couldn’t count on someone finding him. He was tired and hungry, and there was no guarantee that the assassin wouldn’t try again if Tony lingered around too long.

At least he wasn’t that far. He had only managed to go a few blocks, hiding in an abandoned shed he had discovered years ago when he used to sneak out of the house to go on adventures. The shed was in an empty estate, behind the main house (which was big, but not as big as Tony’s), and accessible by a tear in the fence. The estate had belonged to a wealthy businessman who had been discovered embezzling money from his clients in some sort of scheme. He had been convicted and sentenced to prison. The house, along with a lot of his assets, were tied up in legal red tape, so it had just been sitting there for the last few years.

Tony remembered his father telling him about the former businessman as a cautionary tale – rich criminals were still criminals, and would one day get their due. It was actually a pleasant memory, one of the rare times when his father had sat down to actually talk to him. Even though Tony had been only fourteen, he had been treated as if he was smart enough to understand, which had made him ridiculously proud of himself. Of course, the good feeling hadn’t lasted long – his father had gone back to ignoring him soon enough – but he’d had it for a short time at least.

Keeping near the wall to have something to lean against, Tony began to walk, ears alert for any noise. With his watch broken during his escape, it was hard to tell what time it was or how long he’d been gone.

It was a good thing Tony had chickened out of asking Rhodey to spend a few days with him before Christmas, he thought. His friend might have been killed last night if he’d been there. If the masked man hadn’t blinked at killing Tony, he certainly wouldn’t have hesitated to murder anyone else who stood in his way.

Although Rhodey would probably have said no anyway. As much as Tony had tried to hide it, he was beginning to suspect that maybe Rhodey was aware of Tony’s stupid crush on him. Plus he had his actual family, who was nice and warm like a family was supposed to be. Why would he want to spend time with the dysfunctional Starks? Why would anyone want that?

God, why couldn’t Tony have a normal family? With a dad that actually loved him?

A car horn made him jump, and he cursed when his bad foot hit the ground hard.

Dammit, Tony, focus, he told himself. This was not the time to worry about his ridiculous infatuation or his stupid daddy issues. The latter was pointless and the former… It would go away. It had to. He wasn’t going to lose his best (only) friend over it.

By the time he reached the back of his own house, Tony was sweaty and exhausted. His arm had started to bleed again, and his foot felt like it was on fire. He was also getting a little lightheaded, which was probably not a good sign. Had he hit his head at some point? He couldn’t quite remember, but he probably had. There had been a lot of dodging and falling.

Fuck, he was tired.

He circled the wall until he came to the back gate, which was locked. Of course it was. Tony had left by the main entrance, the assassin hot on his heels. The only reason he had been able to escape was because he knew the area well enough to navigate in the dark.

Tony pressed the intercom and waited, slumping against the wall. His vision was greying out around the edges.

Shit.

*****

The low murmur of voices woke him, and Tony opened his eyes in confusion. He recognized the ceiling of his bedroom, though he wasn’t sure how he’d gotten here. In fact, he wasn’t sure what had happened at all – or why everything seemed to hurt.

He moaned as he attempted to sit up and was hit by a wave of pain.

“Tony? Honey!”

Before Tony had a chance to say anything, his mother’s arms were around him, squeezing just a bit too tight.

“Mom,” he winced.

“Sorry, baby.” She let him go, though she remained close. “Are you all right, darling? Are you in pain? Do you want me to get the doctor?”

“No, it’s fine.” The fog had lifted from his mind, and he recalled the events that had led him to flee from the masked assassin. He’d made it home. It was going to be okay now. Perhaps it was childish, but he didn’t want his mom to leave just yet.

“How do you feel, sweetheart?”

“A bit fuzzy,” he said. He had a bit of a headache, though he couldn’t complain too much. He was alive, after all.

“You gave us quite a scare.” She caressed Tony’s hair as she spoke, watching him as if he was the most precious thing in the world.

“I was a bit scared,” he confessed. It wasn’t something he would ever have admitted in front of his father, but his mom was a different story. She didn’t expect him to be perfect.

“Yes, I imagine so. You’re safe now, honey.” Her smile was genuine, and Tony allowed himself to relax.

“Did… did you get the guy?” Tony hadn’t allowed himself to linger on thoughts of the masked man before, but… what if he came back?

Stop it. It’s fine. You’re home. Considering he had been attacked at home, though, that fact was not enough to comfort him.

“Not yet, but the police is looking for him. And your father. He’ll be found, eventually, I have no doubt.” She offered him a smile that wasn’t as confident as she probably meant it to be.

“Dad? Dad’s looking?” So he wasn’t here. Of course he wasn’t – why had Tony expected that this time would be different? The last time he’d been kidnapped, Howard had been on the other side of the country, and had come home to yell at Tony. As if it had been Tony’s fault he’d been snatched by some low-grade assholes looking to make a buck.

“Of course, darling. We were so worried when we heard that you were missing.”

Tony bit down the disbelieving snort that threatened to escape. His father wouldn’t have been worried because he didn’t care, no matter what his mother told him. She always tried to defend him, but Tony knew better by now. He wasn’t a stupid kid anymore.

“Anyway, you’re safe now, and the doctor said you’ll be all right. You bumped your head, it seems, but nothing serious, so the headache should clear up soon. And your ankle will heal soon too.”

“Okay,” Tony said, shifting into a more comfortable position (it was more difficult that it should be, really). “I’m sorry I ruined your vacation.”

Maria smiled gently. “Don’t be silly, darling. We’re glad to have you home safely.”

She settled on the bed next to him, and Tony allowed himself to curl up next to her. He knew he was too old, but he’d had a shit day (days? he wasn’t even sure what day it was anymore) and he figured it would be okay this once. Howard wasn’t here to see him being weak and pathetic anyway.

The next time he woke, Tony felt a little better. His headache wasn’t gone entirely, but it was better. He was also really hungry.

Carefully, he moved to a sitting position and did an inventory of himself. His left arm still hurt a little, though he could see now that it had been cleaned and bandaged. His foot was mostly fine; well, as long as he didn’t try to walk too much, he figured. The other aches and pains had also lessened considerably. He was all right, all things considered.

And hungry. Couldn’t forget that with the way his stomach was growling noisily.

He had sat up and was just contemplating how to stand (and walk) without aggravating his ankle when Jarvis opened the door.

“Master Tony! What are you doing? You need to rest.”

“I’m hungry,” Tony whined, but allowed Jarvis to get him settled back on the bed and fuss over him.

“I’ll get you something. What would you like?”

“I don’t know. Some sandwiches, maybe? Anything is fine.”

Jarvis smiled. “Of course. How do you feel?”

“Better.”

“Good. You gave us quite a fright, you know.”

“Yeah, mom said. Sorry about that.” He’d had quite a fright himself.

“Not your fault,” Jarvis said. “You were very brave.”

Tony squirmed slightly, uncomfortable with the praise – even though he kind of liked it. “I just ran away,” he murmured. His father probably wouldn’t think him very brave at all. Captain America – the greatest hero in the world, according to him – would have done better; he would have fought off the assailant like a real hero instead of running scared.

“Yes, well, that’s exactly what one should do in such situations.” Jarvis said, and it made Tony feel a little bit better. Jarvis paused, looking at Tony as if to make absolutely sure that everything was all right. “The police and the FBI will want to talk to you, when you feel up to it.”

“I don’t think I can tell them anything useful. I mean, maybe a description of the guy, but you must have gotten that already from the security cameras.” Tony hated talking to the police. There had been a few occasions when he’d had to – after he’d been kidnapped and a couple of times when he’d done something stupid in school – and he’d never cared for it. It always made him feel awkward and unsure – and young – and he knew he should be better than that.

“We did get an image, yes, but they’ll want to ask you some questions anyway.”

“Fine, then.” Tony said, sounding a bit like a petulant child, which he hated.

“I’ll let your parents know you’re awake and get you those sandwiches.”

“Thanks, Jarvis.”

“It’s good to have you home safely, Sir.”

Since he didn’t have to go in search of food after all, Tony stayed in bed. He really wished he could just… not think about any of this anymore, though he was well aware that it wasn’t going to happen. Still, he didn’t want the masked man to come back, so cooperating with the police was probably a good thing, no matter how awkward it made him feel.

It didn’t take long for Jarvis to return with the sandwiches. His mom was with him, as was Howard, and Tony immediately felt himself getting tense, which just made everything hurt more, dammit.

“Are you feeling better, baby?” Maria asked as she settled on the bed next to him, placing the food tray in the nightstand. She handed him a glass of juice with a straw in it, which Tony thought was a bit of an exaggeration. There was nothing wrong with his hands. And straws were for babies.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he replied, aware of his father leaning against the door. Bastard couldn’t even be bothered to come all the way inside.

“Did he say anything?” Howards asked, finally walking in.

Tony swallowed his mouthful of sandwich and looked down. Was it really too much to ask for his father to at least pretend to care? “No,” Tony replied, struggling to keep the hurt out of his voice. Don’t show weakness. You’re not a child. You don’t need anything from him.

He really wished he could believe that.

“What happened?” his father insisted.

“Howard, let him be,” his mother said with a reproachful look.

“That man is still out there, Maria. We need as much information as we can get if we want to catch him.”

“Well, Tony’s eating now. The questions will keep for a few minutes more.” Her tone made it very clear there would be no arguments on this. Tony really envied his mother’s ability to sound commanding; she made it seem easy too.

Howard relented. “Fine.” Then he just walked out without another word.

Maybe it was the pain still making his head a little fuzzy, but this time he couldn’t really keep the tears from spilling. Why did he keep feeling disappointed like this? He should know better, dammit.

“Oh, honey, it’s okay. We’ll catch him.” Maria’s arms went around him again, and it made Tony feel a little bit better.

Tony nodded numbly, barely noticing as Jarvis went after his father.

“Why doesn’t he care?” he murmured, ashamed of himself for how stupid and childish he sounded.

The hope that his mother hadn’t heard him was quickly dashed.

She frowned. “What? What are you talking about, Tony?”

“Nothing,” he mumbled. There was no need to harp on it. He was far too old to be wanting daddy’s attention anyway. He was in college, for god’s sake. It was really time he got a grip on himself.

“Sweetheart, look at me.”

Reluctantly, Tony complied.

“Honey, your father loves you very much,” Maria said. She sounded like she really believed it too, but Tony knew better. She was just trying to make him feel better. He appreciated the effort, he really did, but he would prefer to do away with the lies.

“Yeah, sure,” he said to appease her. Why argue? It wasn’t going to change anything.

Maria sighed. “Finish your food. We’ll talk about this later, when you’re better. Do you want me to stay?”

Tony did, but he wasn’t about to say that. He was too embarrassed already. “I’m fine.”

With a kiss to his forehead, she gave him one last smile and left.

Tony slumped in bed again and cursed himself for being so dumb. Grow the fuck up, Tony, he told himself firmly.

Despite his inner turmoil, though, he was still hungry, so he turned his attention back to eating. It didn’t quite work, of course. His mind was never on only one thing, and all kinds of thoughts circled around in his brain. Some were good, like some new ideas for how to code his robot, and others were… not. He wondered what his father would have done if the masked man had actually managed to kill Tony.

Would he have grieved? For him or for the heir of the company? Would he have felt regret for how he had treated Tony? (Did he even realize how much of an asshole he was?)

He fell asleep at some point despite those disturbing thoughts, and woke with Jarvis gently shaking him awake.

“Sir?”

“Hmm?” Tony sat up, still feeling a little groggy, and saw the police officers waiting at the door. Right, he was supposed to give a statement.

His parents were also there, and remained for the whole interview, for which Tony was grateful, even if all Howard did was scowl at everything and everyone.

He told them everything and answered all their questions as best as he could, but he really didn’t know much. The man had said nothing, so Tony had no clue who he was or what he had been after. He didn’t even know for sure if the man had chased him out of the house. He hadn’t bothered to look back, just ran as fast as he could. He thought he’d heard him, but it could have been his imagination working overdrive.

When the detectives left, Tony slumped back in his bed, tired even though he had just woken up.

“You did very well, darling,” his mom said with a proud smile.

Tony managed a wobbly smile in response and purposefully did not look at his father. He didn’t want to see the indifference there.

“We’ll find the fucker,” was the only thing Howard said. “He won’t get away with this.” Then he was gone again, muttering something under his breath Tony couldn’t understand.

“Your father is stressed, honey,” Maria told him.

Why she insisted on defending him Tony didn’t know. It would be better if she just acknowledged the truth, he thought. Tony was a big boy now, he could take it.

Could you really? A little voice in his head whispered. The voice of the boy who still wanted his dad to love him. God, he hated that voice.

Tony shook his head and made himself get up. Enough of wallowing.

“Where are you going?” mom asked.

“I just need to get some air,” he replied. “I’m sick of being in bed.” He needed to do something to get his mind off this whole mess. It was the holidays, dammit, and some shitty assassin wasn’t going to ruin it for him.

He had difficulty putting his shoes on, though, as his ankle still throbbed a bit. Still, a little pain wasn’t going to keep him stuck in bed the whole day. Anything to get away from… all this.

Maria didn’t look entirely convinced, but she didn’t stop him. She took his arm and walked with him to the back garden, pointing out flowers he already knew the names of just to have something to say – to give him something to focus on. She was nice like that, always trying to make him feel better.

To his immense irritation, Tony soon got tired. He tried his best to hide it, but his mom was no fool. Regardless, she didn’t say anything, just led him back inside to the music room and started playing the piano while Tony made himself comfortable on the couch.

He loved hearing her play. When he had been very small, he would sit beside her on the piano and watch her hands move over the keys in fascination. It was a different sort of craftwork, he’d always thought. Tony could build machines, and his mom made the most beautiful music with her hands. She had a lovely voice too, and Tony smiled as she went through some of her favorite songs – which were his favorites too.

It was peaceful, being here with her like this. For a while, he could stop thinking – obsessing – about things that were beyond his control, and just relax and let the music flow through him. Calming melodies and Maria’s quiet but heartfelt singing were able to chase his worries away.

He must have fallen asleep at some point, because the next thing he knew, his mom was gently shaking him awake to say that it was time for dinner.

“Come on, baby. Let’s get some food into you, then you can go back to your rest.”

Tony realized he was starving, and wolfed down the food without pausing. He noticed that his father wasn’t at the table, but that was nothing new. Howard was probably busy with… whatever it was that was more important than his family (than his son) – which was probably everything.

Get over it, Tony, he told himself again. Mom had a rather pinched look in her eyes, though she smiled whenever Tony looked in her direction, as if everything was fine.

Jarvis didn’t seem particularly happy either when he brought Tony a glass of water later.

“Is everything okay, Jarvis?”

The smile he got in response was a bit forced. “Yes, of course. Don’t worry about anything, Sir. It will all be all right.”

Tony nodded. “Yeah, sure.” For a given definition of ‘fine’, he supposed. Back to the status quo, at least.

There was plenty of work to do, what with his impromptu vacation, so he buried himself in it after dinner. His AI robot was coming along nicely, but there was still a lot of coding and building left to do, and no shitty assassin was going to stop Tony. He had already wasted far too much time sleeping and generally being useless. He wanted to have the base code ready when he returned to college in order to get right on with the first batch of actual tests. This was going to be his best work yet, he knew it. It was going to be spectacular, and he’d make all the people that doubted him eat their words and weep with envy.

(And he’d pretend that his father indifference didn’t bother him.)

“I’m so glad you’re safe, sweetheart,” Maria said when she came to wish him good night. She stayed for a while, watching him sort through component parts and write down lines of code. “Everything is going to be fine now. You’ll see.”

Maybe his dad didn’t care, but at least his mom and Jarvis did. He wasn’t alone. It was okay.

Chapter Text

Howard stared at the slightly grainy image of the man who had tried to kill his son and tightened his grip on his glass of scotch. Who the hell was that fucker and what had he wanted? How was Howard supposed to protect his family if he didn’t even know what he needed to protect them from?

Was this about his weapons? The anti-gun crowd was still going strong, and plenty of them had been very vocal in their dislike of SI and Howard in particular. As if he was the only weapons manufacturer in the world. As if he’d invented wars. As if he actually wanted that to be his fucking legacy. But blaming him for everything was easier than dealing with a world that required weapons in the first place.

Was this about SHIELD and whatever they were involved with? Did it have to do with the serum? Or some of the other tech he had worked on for them? He didn’t make weapons for SHIELD anymore, but there were other things, surveillance mostly. Damn, what were they even using those for? He should never have gotten mixed up in that to begin with. Why had he ever thought that was a good idea? Howard wasn’t a soldier, he wasn’t a politician. He wasn’t equipped to make those sorts of decision, and he no longer trusted Peggy to make them either.

Did it have to do with a disgruntled business rival or former employee? There had certainly been no shortage of threats from that corner, even though it was Obie who handled most of the business side – and was the one who was actually ruthless when it came to securing contracts for the company. On the employee side, there were always a few who got fired (usually for good reasons) and didn’t take it well. Howard had learned that some people simply weren’t able to accept their own faults and preferred to blame others for their own fuck-ups, and Howard made a convenient target. After all, he was rich, so everyone wanted a piece. It was annoying, but it came with the territory.

Fuck it all.

With a sigh, Howard got up and poured himself another shot. Of course drinking wasn’t going to help anything. There were no answers to be found in the bottom of a glass (or a whole bottle), but he hated feeling so goddam helpless. It had been sheer dumb luck that Tony had managed to get away without a bullet in his head. Pure dumb luck.

And worse, it hadn’t been the first time his son’s life had been in danger. And, in all likelihood, it wouldn’t be the last either. Howard hated it. He fucking hated the thought of his kid in danger.

He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how to fix this. Hell, he didn’t know how to fix anything anymore. He was lost. He had been lost for quite some time, but he was only now truly realizing it. What should he do? What could he do?

So many questions and not a single damn answer. And Maria wondered why he kept drinking.

Shit. Fuck. Damn it all to hell.

“Sir?”

The voice startled Howard and he cursed as the glass fell from his hand. “Fuck!” he swore. “Don’t you fucking knock?” he said, more angrily than he intended. Shit, he was a mess.

Jarvis, used to his moods, didn’t say anything, just got a piece of cloth from… somewhere… to mop up the carpet.

“I came to tell you that dinner it ready.”

“Not hungry,” was his rather petulant reply. Christ, he wasn’t feeling up for company. Hell, he could hardly stand to be around himself right now.

Jarvis gave him the unimpressed look that never failed to make Howard squirm inside. There weren’t many people that could make the great Howard Stark fell like shit, but Jarvis was one of them. Maria was another, and Howard definitely didn’t need another lecture from either of them about his drinking and his… everything. Their vacation was supposed to help them get back into some semblance of normality, but that had gone to hell, obviously.

Fucking assassin.

And Tony would be there too, putting up a brave front even though he had to be fucking terrified after his latest brush with death. Did he blame Howard? He probably did. And why not? Howard made enemies, and now these enemies were trying to kill his family. And he didn’t even know why. What had they been after? There were too many possibilities, and… Fuck.

Howard was tired. Just too fucking tired of all of it.

“I’ll eat something later,” he told Jarvis, hoping the other man would drop it.

“Very well.” With an air of disapproval, Jarvis left.

Howard sank back into his chair and massaged his temples. Great. Now he had a fucking headache on top of everything.

If he thought skipping dinner would spare him from having to deal with the rest of the household, however, he was soon disabused of that notion.

Maria didn’t bother to knock, just stormed in angrily.

“What now?” Howard asked, taking yet another sip of his drink.

“I have had it with you, Howard. It’s time to get your act together.” She looked down her nose at him as if she might like to slap him. Howard had been slapped quite a few times in his life, though never by Maria.

“Oh, piss off,” he said. He realized he was slightly tipsy, and maudlin. Not a great combination, but one he had become familiar with over the years.

“What did you say?” Maria had narrowed her eyes and was watching him as if he was bug she was about to crush under her shoe. In truth, he hadn’t seen that side of his wife in a while. Weird as it might be, he found he missed it, even if he knew he was about to get a good telling off (he was also not ruling out the slapping).

In all honesty, he probably deserved it.

“Put the glass down right now, Howard. Enough of this.”

With a sigh, Howard drowned the last of his drink and put it aside. “What it is?”

“What is it? What is it?” she asked as if he was a complete idiot. Hell, maybe he was. He had endangered his family, and for what? For SHIELD? What had those fuckers ever done for him? Hell, what had those fuckers done for the world? It didn’t feel like they were protecting it anymore, though Howard didn’t want to think about what the hell they were doing these days if protection was really off the agenda.

“Our son was almost killed, Howard, and you sit here drinking?”

“What the fuck do you want me to do about it, Maria?” He stood up, getting a bit angry himself now. “I’m trying to find out who it was. I’m trying to figure out how to keep Tony safe – how to keep all of you safe. What else do you want from me?” Why did everyone expect him to do everything? To have all the answers? He was just one man, for fuck’s sake, and not even a very good one despite his intelligence.

“I want you to show up for dinner and act like you care about your son!” She snapped.

“I care about my son!” he shouted back. He knew he wasn’t the best father, but how dare she imply that he didn’t care. Tony was the most important thing in the world to him.

“Then show it! Because right now he doesn’t believe it.”

That brought Howard up short. “What?”

“Tony is convinced that you don’t give a damn, Howard, and frankly, I can’t blame him. You haven’t even hugged him since he got back.”

“I… what?” Now he felt like an idiot. “I didn’t… I’ve barely… he was…” Well, wasn’t that great? Now he couldn’t even form a fucking sentence.

“He is a child, Howard. He needs reassurance. He needs his father. Get yourself sobered up, and go talk to you son. Actually talk. Tell him how worried you were.”

Howard felt back into his chair, utterly exhausted. Did Tony really think Howard didn’t care? Fuck.

“And no more drinking,” Maria said, and he knew she wasn’t kidding. “I’m going to tell Jarvis to get rid of all the alcohol in the house.” Her expression softened up a bit. “We can’t go on like this, Howard. None of us.” She was tired too. This fucking mess had affected all of them.

Howard nodded. She was right. He knew that. He had known that for a while, he simply hadn’t found the will to actually do anything about it. He hadn’t had much energy for much at all lately. Fuck.

Maybe almost losing his son might be the kick in the ass he needed to, as the saying went, to get his shit together.

She was still waiting, so he sighed and got up.

“Go take a shower and eat something before you talk to Tony,” she said, and it wasn’t a suggestion.

Yes, it would be a good idea to sober up a little first.

By the time he got out of the shower, there was a tray waiting for him in the dresser. Howard couldn’t say he had much of an appetite, but he dutifully ate all the sandwiches left for him. It did make him feel a little better. Drinking on an empty stomach was never a good idea. Hell, drinking in general wasn’t a great idea, not for someone like him.

He knew he had a problem, he wasn’t that stupid. It was just… hard to deal with it. Hard to admit, even to himself. But… maybe it was time to man up and do so. How was he supposed to protect his family by being a drunken asshole? They deserved better.

He hesitated in front of Tony’s door. What was he supposed to say? He had never been good with words (outside of science and business – or seduction, though he doubt he would have been very successful at that if he hadn’t also been very rich) or feelings.

He is a child. He needs his father, Maria had said. What was a father supposed to do? Howard tried to think back to his own father, but that was no help. He couldn’t recall having a real conversation with his father about much of anything. Frank Stark had been a man of few words, a hard worker with little ambition beyond getting through each day – or so he’d seemed to a young Howard who had wanted to do – and be – so much more. He knew his parents had done the best they could with what they had at the time, which hadn’t been much at all. Surviving had been all they could do, and not even that – like many poor people of that generation, Frank and Elsie Stark had died of stupid diseases that could be treated very easily today. Howard had wanted to do better with his own children, and look how that had gone. He didn’t have any idea what to do most of the time, and even less so right now.

Just do it, Howard, he told himself. Talk to the kid.

With a deep breath, he knocked on the door.

“Come in,” Tony said, so Howard did.

It was clear from the second he entered that Tony had not been expecting him. He immediately straightened on his desk, trying (rather ineffectively) to hide the pain the movement caused him. He looked almost… scared.

Fuck.

“How are you feeling?” Howard said, coming closer but not too close. There was a myriad of electronic parts and scribbled sketches and what looked like pages of code strewn around the table. It was the same sort of mess of Howard’s own workspace.

“Fine,” was the automatic response. Tony’s eyes were wary, with none of the warmth Maria’s presence always evoked. Fuck. How had he never noticed that before? (Well, if you’d actually spent more time with the kid, you might have seen it. The sarcastic voice in his head sounded like Maria – possibly because she had said something similar a few times already.)

Does my son hate me? Howard wondered. Is he actually afraid of me? What kind of shit father am I?

He swallowed the pain of that realization and went on. “That’s good. We were all worried.”

Tony turned his head slightly and muttered something under his breath that made his disbelief pretty obvious.

Maria was right. Tony thought Howard was a jerk who didn’t give a fuck about his son. Fuck.

“I was worried about you,” he forced himself to say. Not because it was untrue, but because Howard didn’t like talking about feelings.

Suck it up, Howard. Do you want your son to keep hating you? he told himself firmly. He could deal with some discomfort. After all, some maniac had just tried to murder Tony. If Tony could make it through that, Howard could do this.

Tony didn’t reply, and Howard wasn’t sure what that meant. “Look, Tony…” he began, then trailed off. Christ, he was so bad at this. “I know we haven’t… I haven’t been a great father… I want… I want to make this right.” But I don’t know how, hung unsaid in the air, settling heavily over them.

There was still no answer, and Howard had to fight the urge to fidget in discomfort. Fuck. What was he supposed to do now? Should he get Maria? Maybe she could help. God knew he needed all the help he could get at the moment.

“Son, I’m sorry,” he said when he couldn’t stand the silence anymore. Tony wasn’t even looking at him. “I’m sorry I’m such a poor excuse for a father. I don’t… What… Fuck. What do you want me to say?” he almost implored.

“Are you proud of me?” Tony asked, voice so low Howard could barely hear him. There was fear in his eyes as he waited, still not really looking at him, and Howard felt his heart breaking. Fuck.

“Of course I am,” he said, ignoring the way his own voice sounded so wobbly. Shit. How could Tony doubt that? “Of course I am,” he repeated, and took a step forward. “I am so very proud of you.”

Tony launched himself off the desk and nearly toppled them both to the ground. Howard managed to keep his footing and hugged the kid tight. He didn’t miss how Tony remained tense, as if he regretted getting close at all.

“I love you, son,” he said. “You’re the most important thing in the world to me. The best thing I’ve ever done.” Tony was sobbing into his shoulder and Howard felt his own tears falling. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Why hadn’t he ever said those things before? It wasn’t that hard. It shouldn’t be that hard. Christ, what the hell was wrong with him? All he knew was that he had to find a way to fix this.

Don’t let go. Don’t let go.

He didn’t know how long they clung to each other, or at which point they got on the bed. It didn’t matter. When Tony finally let go, wiping his eyes on his sleeve, Howard wanted to get him back into his arms. He realized he could not recall the last time he had held his son. He also realized how much he had missed it. Why had he ever stopped? How had he become this cold-hearted bastard that kept people – even his own family – at arm’s length?

He remembered the day Tony was born, the joy he had felt at seeing his little boy for the first time. He remembered the awe with which he had looked upon the tiny baby placed into his arms. Maria’s radiant smile had mirrored his own. After all those years of false hope and heartbreak, and there was their son, healthy and whole at last. The best thing Howard had ever done.

And he had somehow ruined it.

No. No, there’s still time. I can fix this. I have to. I will, he vowed to himself.

There was going to be a lot of changes here. Things hadn’t been going right for a long time, and nothing would get any better unless he worked for it. He could do this. He had to.

“We’re going to be okay,” he told Tony, trying to make his voice as sure as he could. If you sound like you believe it, people will believe it too. He’d learned that lesson early in his life, and it was especially important in business. He was usually good at that. After all, he’d managed to get Stark Industries off the ground all by himself, convincing investors that he knew what he was talking about, that he could deliver what he was promising.

Why was it so easy to deal with business people and so hard to talk to people he actually cared about? “It’s going to be okay,” he repeated.

There was a lot more he wanted to say, but he couldn’t find the words. Instead, he asked Tony about what he was working on, figuring that talking about work would be easier. It was clear that Tony was still wary, talking in fits and starts, never showing the kind of enthusiasm Howard knew he was capable of. He seemed braced for a blow every time he looked at Howard, every time he finished a sentence or explained an idea.

It was that heartbreaking expression that made Howard hold his tongue. Whenever he was shown a project at SI, he would poke at all its potential problems and weaknesses (and yes, sometime he was less than polite about it, but it was his reputation on the line there. His company could only produce the best.) This was not the time for that, though, not with how fraught their relationship was at the moment. Howard felt like he was walking on eggshells, and he didn’t like it.

It’s your own fault, he thought, so he grit his teeth and asked questions he hoped would not be misinterpreted as criticism and said nothing about the things he wasn’t very convinced about.

He’s a child, he needs his father. He had to remember that. Be a father, Howard.

It was not, perhaps, the most relaxed conversation in the world, but it was a start. It had to be.

*****

A week later, they were no closer to finding the criminal, but things were better anyway. Howard and Tony were (mostly) getting along at last, and it was… pretty good. While they were far from being entirely comfortable with each other, they at least could have a conversation without anyone yelling or storming off in a rush.

On Christmas Eve, Howard, Maria, Tony and Jarvis were sitting together for dinner, and the mood was light and cheerful. Howard couldn’t remember the last time they had spent Christmas together as a family. Why hadn’t they? God, he had been such an ass.

Maria and Jarvis had made good on their promise to get rid of all the alcohol in the house, which meant they were toasting Christmas with apple cider and coke instead of wine. Not Howard’s favorite by a long shot, but he could live with it.

He did get a bit twitchy from time to time, fingers aching for a glass when his mind started spinning in bad directions. At least being home meant that he could redirect that restless energy to something else. So far, bothering his wife had worked as a good distraction; she would either find him something to do around the house to keep him occupied or talk to him about their future plans. While their vacation had been cut short, Maria was determined to get them away for some downtime eventually. Howard wanted to make sure the threat was dealt with before they went anywhere, however, and she agreed, though that didn’t stop them thinking about what they could do and where they could go when the time came.

Despite the leftover tension from the attack, he and Maria were getting along pretty well too. They had even talked about sharing a bedroom again. It seemed like they were finally on the same page about Howard’s work and their son’s life. Howard was ashamed of how little he had been involved in Tony’s affairs since the boy had gone off to college, how little he had known about what was going on with his son.

College was actually one of the things they were most concerned about. What if the assassin came back and tried to get at Tony on campus? It was high time they got Tony a permanent bodyguard, but Howard had no idea how to find one. A few years ago, he might have asked Peggy for a recommendation, yet now… he couldn’t really say he trusted her anymore. He certainly didn’t want anyone who was in any way affiliated with SHIELD, either now or in the past.

Peggy had tried to talk to him once since she had left the day after the attack. Jarvis had answered the phone and told her Howard was busy, and for once she hadn’t insisted, just passed on a message that she was glad Tony was home safely. Perhaps she had realized that it was not a good time to push him any further, or maybe she had holiday plans of her own that she wasn’t willing to disrupt. Whatever her reason, Howard was glad she was keeping her distance. He was under no illusion that she was just going to accept his resignation (which he had officially sent a few days ago), especially when something came up that required a tech expert. Still, this time Howard wasn’t going to give in. He wasn’t going to be persuaded (manipulated?) into going back. Leaving SHIELD had been the right decision, he was sure of it. He was going to stick to it.

“Dad?” Tony said, recalling Howard back to the present. There was still some hesitation in the kid’s voice, as if he was afraid of being brushed off whenever he started a conversation.

It hurt, but Howard knew it would take time.

Time he might not have had if the fucking assassin had succeeded.

“Yeah?”

“So, uhm, I was wondering if it would be okay for me to invite my friend Rhodey to spend a couple of days here before we go back to school.”

“I don’t know, Tony.”

Tony’s expression closed off immediately, and Howard sighed. “That fucker who broke in is still out there. It might not be safe,” he explained.

“You think he’s going to come back?”

Howard shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe. We don’t know what he was after, so we need to be careful.” While Tony didn’t seem happy at that, he didn’t argue; of course he wouldn’t want to endanger his friend. “We’ll figure something out later, ok?” he added, which made Tony relax a bit.

Maria smiled proudly at him and took up the conversation again, asking a few more questions about Tony’s friend. Howard made sure to pay attention and ask a few questions of his own. He needed to make Tony believe that he was really interested (which he was).

Christmas day was also pretty nice, and they all laughed and talked together all through the day.

Howard couldn’t remember when he’d last felt this good about life. It was weird that it had taken an assassination attempt to kick him into gear, but he wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Tony was fine, nothing had actually been stolen, and Howard finally seemed to be back on track after being lost and miserable for far too long. While there was still a long way to go to fix his life, he had taken the first steps, and that was the most important thing.

It was going to be okay.

Chapter Text

It still felt a bit surreal, Tony thought, walking into his father’s workshop a couple of days after Christmas. His mom and Jarvis had actually been right and Howard didn’t think Tony was totally useless after all.

There was still a lot of tension whenever they talked, though it was getting better. Tony wanted to believe it had all been a misunderstanding, but it wasn’t that easy. The little voice in his head that kept telling him he would never be good enough wasn’t gone, just quieter.

“Ah, there you are. Come look at this, Tony,” Howard called once he spotted Tony by the door.

Tony did his best to straighten up before he approached, braced for whatever might come. It was rather exhausting to keep expecting the worst, but he couldn’t relax just yet.

Howard’s lips thinned when he noticed Tony’s tense posture, though he didn’t say anything. “What do you think about this?” he asked instead, showing Tony the schematics for the new propulsion system he had been working on.

Tony hesitated, bringing the paper closer to him so he could pretend to study it while thinking of what to say.

“For fuck’s sake, Tony, I’m not gonna bite. Just say whatever you want,” Howard huffed out. He stood up and started pacing. “I can’t… fuck. I don’t… Can’t we just…?” he trailed off, his whole body slumping. “I’m sorry I’ve been such an ass, Tony. I never… I’m not good at this… this… people thing.”

Tony didn’t know what to say to that either. While he sometimes felt awkward speaking to people, he was sure it should be easy when it was your own fucking family (not that he had an easy time talking to his father, but that wasn’t really his fault, was it?).

“What do you want me to say?” dad continued. “How can I fix this? Because I’m doing my best here, and this is all I got.”

Tony had been so used to seeing his father as a hard man that it was odd to perceive so much vulnerability in his expression. “I don’t know,” he replied at last, unable to keep eye contact for long. It was really disconcerting to see his dad like this.

Howard sighed and sat back down. “I swear I’m trying, Tony.”

It was easier when mom or Jarvis were around, Tony thought. Still, he and dad would have to figure out how to be together alone without fighting at some point; it wasn’t fair to expect mom or Jarvis to always be around to smooth things over between them and manage tempers.

“It’s not…” Howard started, gazing off into the distance. “It’s been a shitty few years, you know. I didn’t even realize how much until…” He shook his head. After a short pause, he went on. “It’s like you fall into this rut, where everything is crap and all you can do is… survive. Put one foot in front of the other and hope you won’t stumble.” He turned to look at Tony. “But you stumble anyway. Fall flat on your face and don’t even notice it, because you can’t quite remember what it’s like to be upright. Everything is a fucking battle, and you feel like you’re always losing, no matter what you do.”

Tony stared at his father with wide eyes. It was like looking into a complete stranger. Was his dad really this… messed up? Tony had always thought of his father as strong, a guy who knew exactly what he wanted and what he had to do to get it. It had never occurred to him that Howard Stark might have doubts, that he might feel lost and unsure. That he might feel like Tony did.

“It’s fucking hard, Tony. All this.” He made a sweeping gesture around the workshop. “Work, family, responsibility. Being smart doesn’t always help, you know. Fuck, sometimes it makes it worse. You keep seeing all the things that are wrong, and yet have no idea how to fix them. People aren’t machines. You can’t run a diagnostic, find the faulty piece and replace it. I wish it were that easy, but it isn’t.”

Tony nodded, though he had no idea what he was supposed to say to all that. To say this was a surprising turn of events would be an understatement.

“Fuck. Sorry, I shouldn’t dump this on you. I don’t know what I’m doing, Tony.”

“It’s all right,” Tony said. Perhaps it wasn’t fair to expect his dad to have all the answers and do everything right all the time. He was trying. Tony couldn’t imagine saying this was easy, but he was trying. “I… I want to…” But the words didn’t come. He wasn’t sure what he wanted. For his dad to be perfect? That was a bit of a tall order, wasn’t it? Just as it had been when he thought his father expected him to be perfect.

He turned his attention back to the papers on the table and focused on that instead, analyzing the design and letting the thoughts tumble out of his mouth unchecked.

It worked. Slowly, the tension dissipated, and they started talking again. Machines were definitely easier, Tony thought, as they continued on into other projects they had both been working on. Even when they disagreed, it no longer felt like Tony was being found wanting; it was just a difference of opinion. It was actually fun to defend his position, to counter his dad’s arguments with facts and data he’d accumulated. For his part, Howard was actually listening, and giving as good as he got.

By the time Jarvis showed up to tell them that dinner was ready, they had been talking for two hours, and there had been no yelling at all.

“I’m glad we can talk like this, son,” Howard said with a smile.

Tony smiled back. “Yeah. It was fun, dad.”

“You’re gonna do amazing things, Tony. You’re going to be so much better than I ever was.” That wasn’t something Tony had ever expected he’d hear from Howard, so it was a struggle to keep the tears in. He lost the battle when his dad hugged him tight. “You’re a great kid, Tony. Never doubt that, ok? Never.”

“Ok, dad.”

*****

The next morning, Tony called Rhodey. He’d called on Christmas to wish his friend happy holidays, but they hadn’t talked much, both busy with their own family celebrations. It had been a long time since Tony had experienced a real family Christmas. In the past, even when Howard was there, he was always doing something else at the same time, never truly present.

Tony was still struggling to make sense of this newfound information about his father. Their sort of heart-to-heart the day before had really thrown Tony for a loop. Clearly there was a lot about his dad that he had never known at all. Perhaps he had been making the wrong assumptions all this time, like his mom had always said.

“Hey Tones!” Rhodey said, tone upbeat. Then he sobered up a little to ask: “How was your Christmas?”

There had been a lot of ranting on Tony’s part about his shitty family situation over the course of their friendship, so Rhodey was probably trying to be sympathetic.

“It was great, actually.” Except for the part about the assassin, but that had been before and thus didn’t count for his Christmas experience. “My dad and I are actually getting along a lot better now. It’s… kinda surreal, to be honest.”

“That’s great, Tony. I’m really happy for you!”

Tony smiled, picturing Rhodey’s face softening the way it did when he was pleased about something. Damn, he missed his friend. “What about you?”

They spent about an hour talking first about their respective Christmases and activities, then about anything else that came into their heads. It was always so easy to talk to Rhodey, Tony mused. It wasn’t often that he felt he could be himself around people. They were either threatened by his intelligence and/or money, or wanted something from him. In any case, Tony always had to be on his guard, and it was really annoying.

Maybe that was why he was so taken with Rhodey. Or maybe it was the fact that Rhodey was really hot. Not that Tony expected anything to ever come out of it, though. As far as he knew, Rhodey was straight, and he tended to treat Tony like a little brother. So Tony kept telling himself that it was just a crush and it wasn’t worth fucking up the best (only) friendship he’d ever had over it.

However, he did wonder what Howard would say about it if he knew. Before, Tony had been sure that his father would have pitched an absolute fit if he ever caught wind of the fact that his only son and heir was less than straight, yet now… There was obviously a lot Tony didn’t know about his father. Maybe he wouldn’t be so disapproving after all. Hell, maybe Howard himself wasn’t all that straight either. Tony knew his father had gotten around quite a bit before he’d married his mom. For all he knew, those affairs could have included men too. He would have had to have been discreet, given the times, but it wasn’t entirely out of realm of possibility.

“Hey Tony?”

Rhodey’s voice brought Tony’s focus back to the conversation. “Sorry, I drifted.”

“You’re really okay then?” There was real concern in his friend’s tone, and it made Tony feel all warm inside.

“Yeah, I’m good.” He really was, near-death experience notwithstanding. And oh, he hadn’t told Rhodey about that yet. “So, a week before Christmas I was almost killed by a crazy assassin!” Tony exclaimed brightly, wanting it to sound less horrible than it was.

“What!?”

The police had kept a tight lid on Tony’s disappearance on his parents’ request, so there had been no mention of his kidnapping in the media. The police and the FBI had still been working on finding leads when Tony had returned on his own, and thus the whole thing had ended up being private. The investigation was ongoing, but it was being kept under wraps.

“Yeah. Some guy broke into the house and took a couple of shots at me, but I escaped and gave him the slip because I’m awesome like that. Total badass.”

In truth, Tony had been scared out of his mind, but he wasn’t about to admit it to Rhodey. He didn’t want his friend to think he was a helpless kid. And, really, at the end of the day Tony had really done all right. He had kept his cool (mostly) and was able to evade the criminal and survive. All on his own. So, yeah, he really was badass.

“Holy shit, Tony! What…? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Got grazed, but I’m all better now.” There would probably be a small scar on his arm, but that was okay.

“Did they get the guy?”

“No, not yet.” That was actually the part that was bothering Tony. Sure, he’d managed to get the better of the guy this time, but what if he tried again? They still didn’t even know what he had been after, if it had been a robbery or an assassination attempt. “Dad says they will, though,” he added, because he didn’t want Rhodey to worry. “But that means I can’t invite you over like I said, remember? Dad doesn’t think it’s a very good idea.”

“Yeah, sure. I understand. But what about college? Will you be safe there?”

“Yeah, it will be fine. Dad’s gonna hire some more security for me.” Tony wasn’t exactly thrilled by that prospect, though. Still, he would be even less thrilled with being shot dead, so he was going to have to deal with it. It might be the perfect incentive to get his parents to agree to him having his own apartment, though, since that would be more secure than being in the campus dorm. Tony was going to be 18 in just five months anyway. He could even invite Rhodey to move in with him. That would be awesome.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You know you can talk to me, right? No need to be all tough guy.”

Tony smiled to himself, touched by his friend’s concern. “Thanks, Rhodey, but I’m really okay now. It was… it was a little scary when the guy was coming at me,” he admitted. He should have known Rhodey wouldn’t think less of Tony for being a little freaked out. “He’s gone now, and I’m doing okay. Hell, maybe this was a blessing in disguise. It got me and my dad talking, so I can’t complain too much.” He would have preferred a less dramatic (and traumatic) trigger, but beggars couldn’t be choosers.

They talked for a few more minutes, then said their goodbyes, leaving Tony with a pleased smile on his face.

*****

Tony gathered his courage the next day and entered his father’s study. It was a place he usually avoided – too many memories of being chased away or chastised for bothering his dad while he was trying to work. His dad wasn’t always pleasant company while there, even for Maria or Jarvis. Tony had always thought Howard was just a dick, but maybe he’d just been stressed out and dealing with it badly.

In any case, dad had made it clear he wanted their relationship to improve, so Tony had to be willing to meet him halfway. Besides, he wasn’t a child anymore. If his dad was being a jerk, Tony could just tell him so (though he had tried that and it had only resulted in yelling, but it had been more of a defensive telling off rather than calling out bad behavior).

“Hi dad. Can I talk to you?” Better to ask before, Tony thought. Howard did have legitimate reasons to be busy, so maybe he hadn’t just been brushing Tony off because he didn’t want to talk to him.

Howard actually smiled. “Yeah, sure, come in. Have a seat.”

Tony did, feeling a little of his apprehension melt away. He could do this. They could do this.

“So, I was thinking… about college.”

“Yeah, we’ve got to figure out a protection detail for you. I’ve got some feelers out already. I’m waiting for my contacts in the military to come back with some recommendations.”

Tony nodded. “I thought it would be easier to do that if I had my own place. Maybe with a roommate,” he added, trying to be casual.

Howard raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

“I’m old enough now,” Tony said. He had wanted his own apartment since the first semester, when he realized campus life was not all it was cracked up to be. His parents had vehemently denied it, though, claiming that he was far too young to be unsupervised. Tony had tried to argue that the dorm could hardly be counted as ‘supervision’ when half the time the residents were doing… questionable things. Unfortunately for him, he hadn’t been convincing enough. In truth, Tony suspected his father had hired someone to keep an eye on him. At the time, he had hated the entire thing. Now perhaps he could see where his parents were coming from, and that it wasn’t him they didn’t trust so much as… everyone else.

“I suppose that is a possibility,” Howard said, and Tony could hardly believe it. Surely it couldn’t be that easy? He had been prepared for a lot more arguing – and even some yelling. His surprise must have shown on his face, because Howard continued. “You’re right that you’re grown up now, almost an adult. And I think you have a better idea of the dangers you face. I think I can trust you to be less reckless. Can’t I?”

The last was a challenge, and Tony was more than ready to accept it. “Yes, you can.”

There were times when he’d been a bit of an idiot deliberately to try to get a rise out of his dad. Testing whether he merited attention. Clearly he might have done better just talking. Oh well. Live and learn.

“Great.”

“We’ll have to talk to your mother, though, see what she thinks.”

“Yeah, sure.” Tony thought his mom would go for it. If it had been this easy to talk dad into it, mom would be a piece of cake. She was always more inclined to cave to his puppy eyes.

“What roommate are you thinking about?”

“Rhodey. I mean, I haven’t talked to him or anything, but… we get along pretty well and he’s great. Looks out for me.”

“We’ll have to meet him first. Make sure he’s okay.”

Tony wanted to bristle at the implication that there could be anything wrong with Rhodey at all, but he could see that his father had a point. “All right. I did want to invite him,” he reminded his father.

“Yeah. Maybe we can arrange that after all.” Howard sighed. He looked tired.

“I was…” Tony trailed off. Maybe he should quit while he was ahead. They’d been having a lot of conversations without yelling lately, and he didn’t want to mess it up now.

“What is it?”

“Nothing.”

“Just say it, Tony. Let’s not… We have to be able to talk to each other. Even if it’s hard.” Howard snorted. “Your mother keeps telling me to get over myself and… She makes it sound a lot easier than it is.”

Tony chuckled. “Maybe we should have listened to her before.”

“Yeah.” Howard paused, gaze lost again. “I used to listen to her. I used to… be better at this stuff. I don’t know when everything went so wrong.” He shook his head. “Come on, what did you want to say?”

There was still a lot that Tony didn’t understand. A lot of questions that remained unanswered, and he didn’t want those things hanging over his head anymore. He didn’t want to keep thinking the worst of his father, to be bracing himself for a fight all the time. Of course they were going to fight sometimes, that was inevitable, but there was a difference between a normal fight and the ones they’d had before.

“I guess I just don’t understand,” he said cautiously. “You just never… I mean… it always felt like you didn’t really like me.”

Howard sighed. “Fuck. I’m sorry, Tony. I didn’t mean to do that. I… I don’t know what to say. I didn’t know you thought that. Really. We had arguments sometimes, but people do. I had no idea you thought that.”

“But you were never there.”

Howard opened his mouth as if to argue, then deflated. “Yeah, I guess not. I’ve been too busy. I should have… I don’t know. I’ve been doing too much, and it hasn’t really… there always seemed to be so many things to do, and I ended up neglecting important things.”

“But it’s going to be different now?” Tony hated how young he sounded just then, but he couldn’t help it. These past days had been really good, and he would hate for it all to disappear once the holidays were over and his dad went back to working full time.

“Yes,” was the immediate reply. “I promise. I’ve realized that I can’t keep going this way. It’s driving me crazy and it’s wrecking our family. I’ve quit SHIELD, so that should free up some time.”

“What’s SHIELD?” Tony asked.

For a moment, Howard hesitated. “I guess you’re old enough to know now. Fuck, if this assassination really has something to do with that, then you need to know for your own safety. And I don’t really trust Peggy to keep her nose out of our lives.”

“What does Peggy have to do with this?”

When Tony had been younger, Peggy Carter used to come to the house often, though she didn’t usually pay much attention to Tony. He knew she had worked with his dad during the war, and that she asked for his help sometimes. Mom didn’t seem to like her much, and Tony had always assumed it was because she was a bit jealous – though he didn’t really think his father had ever shown much interest in Peggy like that. Regardless, in the last few years, Tony had seen her less and less. He’d asked Jarvis about it once, since Jarvis seemed to be friends with her, and he said she was busy with her work. Tony had never really learned what she did exactly, only that it about national security or something.

“Peggy is the Director of SHIELD.” Howard sighed. “SHIELD is an organization that was born out of the SSR from the war. There were… things we saw during the war that made some people believe that we needed someone to keep an eye on certain kinds of threats. Colonel Phillips, Peggy Carter and I got it started. Phillips was in charge until his death, now it’s Peggy. I was responsible for the tech part, as well as some of the funding.”

“How come I’ve never heard of it?”

“SHIELD got more and more secretive as time went on. Since Peggy took over, especially. I’m sure she means well, but she’s gotten really paranoid lately. Anyway, I quit. I’m not really comfortable with the way things are going there anyway. What little I know of it anyway, since I don’t know everything.”

“And you think this has something to do with the attack?”

“Maybe. It’s a possibility that I can’t ignore. There have been some… strange happenings, weird accidents and things like that. Maybe I’m being paranoid too, but for now I’d rather be safe than sorry. I never wanted any of that to spill over into the family, which is why you and your mother know very little about it. I told Peggy from the start that I didn’t want you involved. However, things have changed.”

“Ok.”

It was a lot to take in, really. Tony knew his father knew a lot of important people in the government – and a lot of higher-ups in the armed forces – but not that he was part of a secret organization or something. It was… kinda cool. Not at all what Tony would have expected. Even if all his dad did was handle tech, it was still pretty awesome.

It was even more awesome that Tony was being trusted with it now. Howard didn’t have to tell him anything – in fact, he might get in trouble for doing so, if this whole thing was classified or something – yet here he was, confiding in Tony because he thought Tony was mature enough to handle it. It made him feel really grown-up.

The truth was that, as much as Tony wanted to believe he was an adult, a part of him was very much aware that he wasn’t. He’d thought being in college at 14 would be the height of adulthood and responsibility. In reality, while classes were easy and Tony had no problem with surviving on his own, he missed home a lot. He missed his mom and Jarvis and there were days when he wanted to just say ‘fuck it’ and go home. It was overwhelming sometimes. He was constantly worried that he wasn’t going to be good enough, no matter how many degrees he got or how many awesome inventions he came up with. Sure, a lot of it was tied up with the issues with his father, but it wasn’t just that. While Tony wasn’t much for introspection, he was aware of his own issues.

“Tony?”

“Yeah, sorry. I was just… thinking.”

“I’m sorry to dump this on you. I wanted to protect you.”

“No, it’s okay. I’m not a kid anymore. I can handle knowing things. Maybe I can help you track down the man. I mean, if we can figure out what he was really after. I don’t really think he wanted to kill me, though.” He’d given it a lot of thought, and it seemed more like a case of Tony being in the wrong place at the wrong time. “Maybe he just didn’t want a witness.”

“Yes, I’ve thought of that. He really didn’t say anything?”

“No. He looked… weird. Like he wasn’t all there. I don’t know.” Tony shrugged. “Dead eyes.”

Howard nodded. “I want to show you something, ok?”

“Sure.”

He took out a photograph from a desk drawer and presented it to Tony.

“It’s the Howling Commandos,” Tony said. He had seen a lot of photos of his dad’s time in the war, and even met some of the guys.

“Yes. Look at it closely.”

Tony looked again, going over every face in the picture, and then startled and dropped it on the desk. “Shit!”

“Tell me.”

Tony picked up the photo again. “That’s the assassin!” But it couldn’t be.

Howard nodded. “Yeah. I noticed the resemblance too.”

Tony went back to studying the photo. He knew Bucky Barnes, Cap’s best friend, had been killed ages ago. He fell off a train during a mission, not long before Cap himself was lost. Barnes was dead. Wasn’t he?

“But Sgt Barnes died.” Even if he hadn’t, he’d be an old man now, about as old as his father. The man who had shot at Tony looked young. He’d looked just like the guy in the photo, actually, like he hadn’t aged a day. “It couldn’t have been him.” Tony said, not sure who he was talking to.

Maybe he was wrong – he had to be wrong. The man had been wearing a mask over his face, so Tony hadn’t really seen much of him. It was a coincidence. It had to be.

Right?

The eyes were wrong, though. The assassin’s eye had been cold and… empty. Barnes looked normal in the photo, smiling and everything. But the resemblance really was uncanny.

“I’m not sure what to think anymore, Tony, to be honest. I thought maybe I was imagining it, but you saw it too.”

“But it can’t be him.”

“I know. But… his body was never found.”

“He’d be old. Not… he wouldn’t look the same.”

“Unless someone messed with him.”

Tony raised his head to stare at his father. “What do you mean?”

“When Steve found Barnes, he’d been in the clutches of Hydra. We know they had been working on Erskine’s formula too – that’s how the Red Skull was born. We ran a few tests on Barnes after he was rescued. The results were… odd. At the time, though, we had other concerns, and we never really investigated further. Barnes insisted he was fine, and soon after that Steve got the Commandos together and they started going on missions. But what if he had been given some version of the super soldier serum?” Howard had a faraway look in his eyes now. “There have been attempts to recreate the serum since the war ended. Some of the Hydra scientists survived, they could have been working on it for the Soviets or something.”

“That sounds a bit far-fetched, dad,” Tony cautiously replied. It sounded like the plot of the Captain America comics, not real life.

“The serum is real, we know that.” Howard seemed to be talking more to himself than to Tony now, so Tony let him be. “We know that it can cure illnesses. Theoretically, it could also slow down the aging process. I wanted to test that, you know? But Peggy wouldn’t have it.” There was a touch of bitterness in his voice. “She didn’t want me ‘making a profit’ off of it. She didn’t trust me not to… I don’t know… become a mad scientist or something.” He shook his head. “There are a lot of things one could have done with that formula. Good things, not weapons. But…”

“Dad?” Tony prompted when it looked as if his father had gotten lost in his own thoughts.

“In any case, it’s possible. Far-fetched, maybe, but possible.”

“But why would he try to kill me?”

“Maybe he doesn’t remember who he is. Maybe they messed him up really badly and he’s… lost in his own mind or something. War… does things to people, Tony. It makes them unrecognizable sometimes.”

“So what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. If it is him… we need to find out who sent him and what they wanted. It can’t be a coincidence that he attacked that day.”

Tony frowned. “You mean when you were supposed to go on vacation?”

“No. When I had the serum with me.” He sighed. “We left earlier than we had planned because Maria wanted to have time to get settled at the hotel before dinner. If we had gone at the planned time… we might have met him on the road.”

“What serum?”

“I need to make sure it’s still secure.”

“Dad? What are you talking about?”

Howard shook his head. “Sorry, Tony. I need to make some calls. We’ll talk later, ok?”

Tony nodded. He still a bit confused about what was going on, but decided to believe that his father would give him a better explanation once he’d checked whatever he needed to. They had to trust each other, after all. Tony could do that.

Chapter Text

The New Year’s celebration had been nice. Howard did miss the champagne, but he could live without it. In fact, it was getting easier to ignore the craving for a drink. Who knew spending time with his family was better than booze to quiet the turmoil in his head? Well, now that they were getting along, anyway.

Though she had been a little reluctant at first, Maria had eventually agreed with Tony’s idea of getting his own apartment near campus, provided he had a roommate. So they had invited Rhodey to spend a couple of days with them before school restarted after all, to get a feel for the kid. Tony had nothing but praise for the older boy – in fact, Howard suspected there might be a little bit of a crush going on there. He might not be good with people, but one thing he had always been good at spotting was attraction. He was going to have to observe closely to make sure this Rhodey guy wasn’t going to take advantage of that.

Once she’d agreed, though, Maria had immediately started working on finding a place. Howard knew better than to get between her and a mission, so he told Tony to leave it to his mother. Maria had a good eye for real estate, and she would know what to look for in terms of security. While a lot of people thought Maria was a trophy wife, it was just because they were blind idiots. She might not be a genius, but Maria was no air-headed socialite. Her strengths were in subtlety and determination to see a project through, as well as a scary attention to details.

With that sorted, they continued to enjoy their newfound family time. Howard felt better after being truly honest with Tony about his own struggles and his concerns about SHIELD. There was still some lingering tension, of course, but it was getting easier with every day. Howard knew they still had a lot to talk about, though. A couple of weeks weren’t going to erase a lifetime of mistakes.

He was still debating how much to tell Tony about SHIELD. On the one hand, he wanted the kid to be prepared for whatever might come his way. On the other, he didn’t want to make him too paranoid, or to dig too deep into some of their… questionable actions. Perhaps it was silly, but Howard didn’t want his son to know he was involved in that kind of thing, even indirectly. Just the idea of it made him squirm in shame, and that should really have raised some red flags for him before.

Well, what was done was done, and there was no changing the past. He could only hope to do better in the future.

He had checked with the Pentagon again and found that the serum had been successfully delivered to the intended recipients and nothing was amiss. The army scientists had it now, and it was out of Howard’s hands – for better or worse. He still had the one vial that he had kept as a failsafe, and he was debating what to do with it; he couldn’t shake the feeling that the whole thing should be destroyed before it became another A-bomb. Unfortunately, he had no control over the army, so the best he could do was to promise himself he wouldn’t have anything to do with it anymore.

Of course, the peace couldn’t last forever.

Howard had to go back into work once the holidays were over. There was always a lot to do for the company, and much that required Howard’s personal input or signature.

He was in the middle of reviewing some paperwork when Peggy barged into his office as if she owned it.

“What the fuck!” he exclaimed.

Brenda, his secretary, was right on Peggy’s heels, expression murderous. “I’m so sorry, Mr Stark. She wouldn’t listen to me. I’m calling security right away.”

Howard looked at Peggy and sighed. He wasn’t going to get out of this without a scene, and he really wasn’t in the mood.

“It’s all right, Brenda. I’ll speak with Ms Carter, since she’s so insistent.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

Brenda nodded, gave Peggy one more scathing look, and exited the office, closing the door behind her.

“What the hell is the matter with you, Peggy?”

“I need to talk to you.”

“I quit, just like I told you I would. I’m sure you saw the paperwork.”

“Well, I don’t accept it.”

For a moment, Howard didn’t know what to say to that nonsense. Then he barked out a laugh. “That’s your problem, not mine. I have resigned, and that’s the end of it. I’m done with SHIELD and I’m done with you. The next time you come here without an express invitation I will have the cops escort you out for trespassing.”

“Howard, come on, be reasonable.”

“I am being reasonable, Peggy. You’re the one who doesn’t seem to grasp that I have other priorities in my life.”

“SHIELD is important.”

“To you, maybe. Not to me. In fact, I’m not really happy about the direction it’s been going in the past few years.”

She bristled. “And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I don’t like what you’re doing. I don’t like the secrets, the underhandedness, the questionable actions, the lack of legality in a lot of it.”

Peggy scoffed. “We do what needs to be done. You used to know that.”

“No, I used to just let it go. I don’t want to be part of it anymore, Peggy. And I’m withdrawing my funding as well.”

Her expression immediately changed into anger. “You can’t do that.”

“Of course I can. It’s my money. I’ll give you two months to come up with alternate funding, and then I’m leaving altogether.”

For a while she seemed utterly speechless. “You’re making a mistake, Howard.”

“No, I really don’t think I am. The mistake was staying for as long as I did.” He sighed. “Look, Peggy… I’m old. I don’t want to waste precious time with shit that has nothing to do with me, and that I don’t really feel comfortable with.”

“We’re protecting the world.”

“Are we?” He shook his head. “Because I have doubts about that. We were young and idealistic when we started, Peggy, but… we’re not those people anymore, and it seems to me that all the idealism has disappeared and there’s nothing more than a desire for power and control.”

He could see that the words had some effect on her, even if she didn’t want to acknowledge it. Maybe Peggy needed someone to keep her in check, but that someone wasn’t going to be him – he didn’t think she’d listen to him anyway. He had his family and his company to think about. He had Tony, with whom he was just starting to really connect. That was what mattered, not whatever ‘fate of the world’ thing Peggy had convinced herself was necessary.

“You’re making a mistake,” she repeated, apparently out of arguments.

Howard shrugged. “Maybe, but that’s my decision, and it’s final. Now, if you could please just… leave me alone.” The last part came out more tired than authoritarian. Howard really was tired of all the relentless demands and the never-ending work that didn’t really seem to be doing anyone any good. Hell, he didn’t even know what SHIELD was doing most of the time. Either with the tech or the money he provided.

He had allowed himself to be crushed under all that pressure and stress, and it had messed him up a lot more than he had realized. It was high time he got back to what he had always wanted to do: build things that helped people. And SHIELD was not the place for that.

“Good bye, Peggy,” he said.

With a final huff, she left.

Howard dropped back into his chair and felt a huge weight being lifted off his shoulders. He didn’t really think Peggy was going to give up quite so easily, but for now he was free.

It was a wonderful feeling.

Now all he needed to do was find the assassin who might or might not be Barnes.

*****

James Rhodes seemed like a nice kid. He was clearly a bit nervous to be meeting Tony’s family, though he did his best to hide it. He greeted them politely and couldn’t help staring at everything. Tony was also nervous, Howard noticed, and immediately whisked his friend away for a tour of the house.

“What do you think?” Howard asked his wife. She was a better judge of character than him, most of the time. (The fact that she had never been very fond of Peggy should have clued him in too; god, what a blind moron he had been…)

“Tony seems quite taken with him,” she said, a glint in her eye. Yes, she had seen it too. Howard silently congratulated himself on having figured it out for himself.

“Do you think that’s going to be a problem?”

Maria pursed her lips and sighed. “Maybe, but there’s not much we can do about it. Tony is young, he’s bound to have those kinds of problems. What do you think?”

“I think Tony is far too young for that kind of problem,” he said, well aware that he was being a complete hypocrite. Maria gave him a look that showed she knew it too, though she didn’t contradict him. Tony might be a genius, but he was only 17, and that was a complicated age. It was a miracle they hadn’t had to deal with relationship problems so far. Or perhaps Tony simply hadn’t told them about those.

No, he would have told Maria something if that had been the case. Tony might not have trusted Howard at all until recently, but he did trust Maria and Jarvis. And while they would not have betrayed Tony’s confidence and given Howard any details, Maria at least would have mentioned something.

“It’s inevitable, Howard. You know that.”

He did. Didn’t mean he had to like it.

It wasn’t that he had a problem with Tony having relationships, even if he was still underage. The problem was that one could never be sure about the kind of people that might try to catch Tony’s attention. There were a lot of gold-diggers out there that would probably love to get a hand on the Stark fortune, or just take advantage of being around a rich kid. Howard had had to deal with it once he had gone from a nobody to an important businessman, but he’d been much older then. As a teen, Howard had still only been dreaming of fame and fortune.

“We need to prepare him,” Maria continued. “You need to talk to him.”

Howard’s first instinct was to tell her to handle it; she was way better at talking to Tony. However, he swallowed that urge and nodded. He couldn’t keep passing up his parenting responsibilities onto Maria and Jarvis just because it was hard. It was time to bite the bullet and be a father, and this really was a father-son type of talk.

He could do this. They had been doing okay, and it was getting easier every day.

When the boys came back, they both seemed less nervous. Tony looked definitely happy, and Howard realized how lonely the kid must have been here with just adults for company. Or even in campus. As far as Howard could remember, James was the only friend Tony had ever mentioned.

Maria asked some subtle questions to get to know James a bit better. He was from Philadelphia, and had lived with his mom (his father was dead) until joining the military. He wanted to be an Air Force pilot, and was getting an engineering degree to further his career. He seemed to have a good head on his shoulders, ambitious but not the cutthroat type. While a friendship with Tony could no doubt help him, he seemed to really care about the kid. It made Howard feel a little better.

Before dinner, Howard shared his impressions with his wife, who agreed with him.

“So, we’re really letting Tony get a place with this kid?” Howard asked, a little uncertain. He wasn’t sure now that it was such a good idea, given how Tony might feel about his friend. There could be all kinds of trouble with that.

“I don’t think we’re going to find anyone better,” Maria said.

“Yeah, but…”

“Tony is going to be 18 in just a few months, Howard. As much as we might hate it, he’s about to be an adult. We can’t protect him from everything. Heartbreak is part of life.” Maria was always sensible.

Howard nodded, though he still wasn’t convinced. He would have to talk to Tony first, see how things really were between the boys.

Howard had had a lot of difficulties in his life, but heartbreak was not really one of them. He couldn’t really say he’d ever been madly in love with anyone. He loved Maria and was grateful for her presence and support (even when he was ignoring her and being an ass), but their marriage had never been about passion. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to do much for Tony in that area if it ever came up.

Still, it was comforting to know that perhaps he would at least get to tell Tony that he would get over whatever romantic mishap he faced. Not that long ago Tony had been under the impression that Howard didn’t care about him, so he would have never talked to him about anything. They had been as far apart as it was possible to be, and the thought of it still made Howard’s stomach clench with guilt and anger at himself for being such a prick. Tony deserved better.

He resolved to talk to Tony as soon as his friend was gone. He wanted his son to know that he could come to Howard at any time. Even if he was busy with work, he was going to make time – he’d lost too much of it already.

“We don’t know that James will accept it, though,” Maria said, bringing Howard back to the conversation.

Howard hummed. “I think Tony can probably convince him.” The kid had some impressive puppy eyes, Howard recalled. Jarvis had certainly seemed incapable of telling him no on several occasions, even when he really should have known better. Even Maria wasn’t immune.

*****

James’s visit was a success all around, and it really was good to see Tony happy. The night after James left, Howard steeled himself and knocked on his son’s door.

“So, Tony…” Howard began, a little awkwardly. Oh, this was going to be hard. Fuck.

“Yeah?” There was tension in the set of his shoulders, and Howard sighed. He’d barely started and already he was messing it up.

“I wanted to talk to you about this apartment idea,” Howard continued.

“Are you changing your mind? You said it was okay.” The tension increased, with Tony’s jaw clenching.

“No, I haven’t changed my mind.” Damn, did Tony have to always expect the worse? “I just want to… talk about it.”

“What’s to talk about? Mom’s already looking for a place. And I’ve run the idea past Rhodey.”

“What did he say?”

Tony shrugged. “I didn’t say it seriously. Just like, you know, ‘hey, wouldn’t it be cool if we were roomies?’ kind of thing. He said ‘yeah, sure’, but I know he thought I was joking. Still, it’s something.”

“Yeah, that’s good.” Howard took a deep breath and steeled himself again. Just do it, dammit. “Look, it’s just that…” Come on, Howard. “You like this kid?”

Tony’s eyes narrowed. “He’s my friend.”

Fuck, why was this so hard? Howard had never been a prude, he shouldn’t be so damn uncomfortable. “I meant… You seem to like him as… more than just a friend.”

“What? No! What?! What are you talking about?” Tony protested, but his eyes gave him away.

“I don’t care if you do, Tony. I mean, it’s not…” That made the kid relax slightly, so Howard carried on. “I’m just asking because… being roommates… I just want to make sure you’ll be okay.”

For a while, Tony just stared at him, clearly at a complete loss.

“How did you even know that?” he finally asked, sounding small and painfully young.

“It was kind of obvious, kid. You look at him like he’s the greatest guy in the world.”

“Well, fuck,” Tony muttered, hanging his head. Then he snapped up again. “You don’t think Rhodey knows, do you? Shit, oh shit. He can’t…”

Howard reached out and put a hand on his son’s shoulder. “Calm down, Tony.” He waited a bit for Tony to get himself under control. “It’s all right.”

“It’s not! It’s… He’s my best friend. Only friend,” he admitted. “I can’t fuck this up. I can’t…”

“I don’t think he knows,” Howard said. If James had caught on, he was doing a pretty good job of pretending he didn’t. “It’s all right. It’s going to be all right.” It sounded like empty platitudes to him, but Tony seemed comforted by the words, so Howard figured he should keep at it. “I’m sure everything is going to work out.”

Tony nodded, and they fell silent for a bit. Then Tony took a deep breath and raised his head to look at Howard in the eye. “You’re being remarkably chill about this, dad.”

“What did you think I was gonna do? Disown you?” The minute flinch he saw made Howard clench his jaw in anger and frustration. And, if he was being, honest, pain. Did Tony really think that Howard was so much of a jerk as to toss his son aside for this? Hell, for anything?

“Sorry, dad,” Tony said, looking a bit guilty. “I didn’t… I mean…”

Howard sighed. Clearly he had been that much of a dick. Fuck. “It’s all right.” It wasn’t, really, but what else was he supposed to say? It was what it was. He’d made his own bed here, hadn’t he? If he hadn’t been such a shit father, Tony wouldn’t have been thinking the worst of him all these years. At least things were getting better.

“Thanks, dad,” Tony continued, expression going from guilty to… pleased? “For being cool. I was… I mean, I don’t know… Nothing is gonna come out of this, I know that. But it’s nice that… That you understand.”

“Tony, you’re my son. I’ll always care about you, ok? No matter what. Even if I haven’t been very good at showing it, you’re very important to me.” It was getting easier to say the words, to be more demonstrative of his feelings. It wasn’t a weakness like he had been taught all his life – at least not all the time. He didn’t have to be the tough guy with his family – hell, he shouldn’t be. They should know that he loved them, should believe it without question.

“Yeah, I can… I can see that now. It’s just…” He looked away, then resolutely turned back. “Last time I was kidnapped, you didn’t really seem to care. You weren’t even here.” There was obviously more Tony wanted to say, but he bit whatever it was back and waited.

Howard wasn’t sure what to say to that. He had honestly never considered that Tony might have interpreted his actions as lack of affection. “I was worried sick, Tony. I was trying my best to find you, calling everyone I knew. I wasn’t here it’s because I was trying to get you back. I had a lead on where you might be.”

“You yelled at me when you got back.” Tony’s voice was small and timid, and it broke Howard’s heart even more.

“I was stressed and angry – mostly at myself. I… I’m sorry that I… I don’t really remember yelling.” Now that he thought about it, he had been a bit drunk when he got home. Maria had called him to tell him that Tony was back home safe and sound, and Howard had just… cracked, maybe. He’d been on edge for days – even before the kidnapping – and everything had simply been… overwhelming. And as usual, he had turned to the bottle to cope. So he had taken it out on Tony. Hell, he had probably yelled at Maria and Jarvis too, but they were less likely to take it personally. They knew what he was like, and they knew when to give him a wide berth and let him cool down. Tony was just a kid, he wouldn’t have understood. Of course he thought Howard didn’t give a fuck.

“I’m sorry, son.”

“Were you drunk?” Tony asked, a shrew glint in his eye.

“Yeah,” Howard admitted, shame-faced. “I’m not drinking anymore, though,” he added. “I’m… I’ve stopped. It’s… I should have stopped a long time ago.” He had wanted to believe that he was fine, that he didn’t have a problem, but he did. It wasn’t just the drinking, of course; there had been plenty of things dragging him down (the job – multiple jobs –, his own inability to cope, the general sense of helplessness he’d felt, the distance from his family, all kinds of things). It had not been easy to stare at his own failures, and alcohol had seemed to make things a bit more bearable, at least for a while. It was an illusion, though, because in the end it only ever made everything worse. Whatever relief he got would inevitably give way to more problems, more arguments, more hopelessness. It really was a vicious cycle, and Howard was glad he had found a way to get out of it.

There must have been hundreds of moments like that, Howard thought. Times when Howard had been busy, or drunk, or exhausted, or just plain short-tempered, and had treated Tony badly; ignored him, dismissed him, made him feel unwanted and unloved. No wonder Tony thought he didn’t care. Fuck.

“That’s good,” Tony said, a tentative smile on his face.

“It is. Listen, Tony… You be careful, all right? Don’t… don’t fall into the same rabbit hole I did. You really don’t want to go down that road, ok? If you have a problem… Talk to us. Me, your mom, Jarvis, whoever you think is best. You’re not… you’re not alone.” Howard wasn’t alone either, though he had believed he was for a long time.

Tony nodded. “Thanks, dad.”

The silence that followed was much less uncomfortable than the previous one. Howard had to bite down the urge to keep apologizing, to let at least a little of the guilt he felt go. If he didn’t, he was going to end up right back where he’d started, spiraling out of control and using less than ideal coping mechanisms.

“Next time I’m being a dick, Tony, you just tell me, ok?” He asked. Howard was under no illusions that everything was fixed, that he would never relapse into bad behavior again, so he could probably use some call-outs from time to time. Maria wouldn’t hesitate, he knew, and neither would Jarvis, but Tony… Tony needed to know that he could speak up.

The boy looked a bit dubious, but agreed anyway.

Seeing as things were going relatively well, Howard went on with the conversation he had wanted to have. He didn’t mention James directly again, not wanting to harp on what seemed to be a painful subject, but kept it about relationships in general. He honestly had no idea how far Tony had gotten in that department since he’d started MIT (he hoped not very far, given the fact that he had been 14 – and was, in fact, still a minor), and wasn’t sure he wanted to know. Tony might act like he knew what he was doing most of the time, yet that didn’t mean he actually did.

“I’m not a child, dad,” Tony said sullenly once Howard had finished his somewhat awkward advice on not trusting anyone who claimed to like him and being wary of overtly friendly people. “I’m just a few months shy of being a legal adult.”

“I know that, Tony. It’s not… Look, it’s not always easy to tell when someone is trying to use you. I just want you to be on your guard.” Howard kept thinking about Peggy, and whether they had ever actually been friends. The more he thought about it, the more he realized that he had always just been a means to an end for her. He didn’t want Tony to go through the same.

“Do you think Rhodey is just pretending to like me?” The vulnerability in his voice was heartbreaking.

If this guy broke Tony’s heart, Howard thought, there would be hell to pay. “I don’t think so. Do you?” Sadly, Howard wasn’t all that confident in his ability to spot a faker anymore.

“He’s never asked me for anything. Never acted like he cares I’m rich.”

Howard nodded, pleased to hear that. While a lot of people cared far too much about money, he was aware that not everyone was like that. Some people were just really good, decent people – he certainly hoped James was one of those.

“I don’t even know if he’ll agree with us living together. He might say he can’t afford it,” Tony said with a sad headshake.

“We can work out an arrangement with him, if it comes to that. If he feels the need to help pay for the place, we can figure out an amount he can be comfortable with.”

“You’re going to make him pay rent or something?” Tony asked, indignantly.

“No. But he might not accept it otherwise. Some people don’t feel good about accepting what they see as charity.” His own father had been like that, and refused to accept any sort of help. Howard remembered being angry that he and his mom had to make do with scraps because his father was just too damn proud to see that, sometimes, they could have really used the help.

“Oh, ok.” There was a short pause, then Tony continued. “So can I talk to him about it? Like, for real?”

“If you’re sure it’s what you want.”

“It is.”

“All right then.”

“Thanks, dad.”

Later that night, Howard gave Maria the highlights of his conversation with Tony. He started by confirming their suspicions about how he felt about his friend.

“He doesn’t think anything will happen, though.”

“It’s probably better that way, at least for now. Tony is still young.”

“He’s growing up fast.”

It had occurred to Howard that he had actually missed a lot (most) of Tony’s childhood. He had always thought that there would be more time, and now… All those missed special occasions weren’t ever coming back. He hadn’t seen him take his first steps, or say his first words, or most of his school accomplishments. He wasn’t going to miss anything else, though. From now on, he was going to be there, whatever it took.

Chapter Text

Tony was really excited to be going back to school, even though the threat of the masked assassin, who may or may not be the (perhaps not) late Bucky Barnes, was still hanging over their heads. That, however, didn’t hold a candle to the fact that he was finally going to get his own place, and that he was (probably) going to get Rhodey as a roommate.

He had talked to his friend about it, and while the initial response had been rather less enthusiastic than Tony had hoped for, he was confident he’d be able to convince Rhodey in time. He could be cute and charming when he wanted to be, and he wasn’t about to take no for an answer for this. Well, of course he would, if Rhodey was really adamantly against it, but Tony had figured that Rhodey’s objection was mostly on the grounds of, as his father had predicted, money. So all he had to do was work out a plan that they were both satisfied with that would let Rhodey accept without feeling indebted.

Aside from that, Tony genuinely liked being on campus and working on all his projects. There were plenty of things he was just dying to show people – and dazzle them with his genius. And now he was also looking forward to showing his dad some of the stuff he’d been doing.

It was truly amazing how a near death experience had changed everything – it had gotten him and his dad talking – really talking – for the first time in… well, ever. Tony had even promised his mom that he would go home a few weekends now because the thought of being home with dad no longer filled him with dread and anxiety. He didn’t have to show up geared up for a fight, expecting dismissal and indifference. In fact, he wanted to spend time with his dad now. (Well, he had always wanted to, he had just never felt like he could.) Howard had promised that Tony could do an internship at SI over the summer, and it sounded amazing. Tony had been to work with his dad a few times, but mostly he had stayed in the office or walked around aimlessly chatting with people. This time dad had promised that he would personally show Tony everything and introduce him to everyone. He was going to get Howard’s full attention, and it was going to be awesome.

There was a part of him that was still a little angry that it had taken his dad so long to get his shit together, causing them both a lot of unnecessary hurt, but another part was trying to be understanding. He had actually talked to his mom and Jarvis a little bit, and had learned more about the sort of stress his dad had been under for the past several years. Howard had still been a shitty father, but Tony could now see that it hadn’t been because he didn’t care, and that helped. They had time to fix their relationship, and as long as they did, Tony would count himself lucky.

Tony’s new driver slash bodyguard helped carry his bags up to his room, and then did a sweep to make sure everything was fine. Tony liked Vince. He wasn’t the stick in the mud some of his previous drivers had been. He could be professional while still cracking a few jokes with Tony. It was a little stifling to know he’d have someone following him around a lot, but it couldn’t be helped. Ordinarily he might have put up more of a fight over it, but after almost being killed in his own house, he wasn’t about to take any chances. If being followed was what it took to keep him alive, he’d deal with it.

Since the “kidnapping” hadn’t actually happened, and Tony had returned home (mostly) unharmed less than 24 hours after his disappearance, the news of the attack hadn’t spread. The police (and whoever else) was still investigating, but the matter hadn’t actually made the press – Howard no doubt had something to do with that. Regardless, Tony was glad. He certainly didn’t want to have to put up with people wanting to interrogate him about it. By now the novelty of his presence on campus had mostly worn off, so he didn’t get too many gawkers anymore. Sure, there were a few people that tried to cozy up to him from time to time, but he could ignore it.

“Thanks, Vince,” he said, tossing himself on his bed and idly looking around the room. He really couldn’t wait to get his own place. His dorm room was okay, but it was cramped and, as a result, a bit of a mess. Tony would love to have more room to properly spread out and organize his stuff. And it would be awesome to have Rhodey as a roommate – someone he actually liked (perhaps a bit too much) to share his space with and talk to. Being by himself was a bit lonely sometimes, even though he preferred it to some of the roommates he’d had before.

Tony was still a bit in awe of the fact that his father apparently had no problem at all with Tony being interested in Rhodey. He had expected some criticism at least, if only about appearances and the company image. It seemed that he had underestimated his father quite a bit.

“I’m going to have a look around and talk to campus security,” Vince told him, and Tony nodded absently, mind already going through all the stuff he had to do for classes.

Rhodey came by just as Tony was getting ready to go in search of dinner, and Tony’s heart skipped a beat at the sight of his friend. His reaction was a bit ridiculous, he knew. Unfortunately he couldn’t help it. He really hoped living with Rhodey wasn’t going to turn out to be a disaster. He was going to have to learn to control himself better. If even his father had noticed after one meeting, Rhodey was bound to catch up if Tony continued to be so careless.

“Rhodey!” he shouted, giving his friend a quick hug because it would be weird if he didn’t. There was going to be a fine line between keeping his feelings to himself and not suddenly acting standoffish.

“Hey, Tones. How was your trip?”

“It was good. You know, no biggie. How about you?”

“Good, yeah.”

“I was going to go for food. Wanna come?”

“Sure.”

Vince was lounging outside the dorm smoking a cigarette. He was young, so he didn’t look too out of place. Tony pointed him out to Rhodey.

“He’s gonna just… be there all day?” his friend asked, dubiously.

“Not all the time, no. But he’ll be around.”

“Man, I hope they catch the guy that tried to kill you.”

“Yeah.” Even though Tony was well aware that even if this one guy was found, there was no guarantee that there wouldn’t be others. “Anyway, I’ve got a couple of places to check out next week. You’ll come with me, right?” His mom was coming as well – maybe even Howard, though he hadn’t promised because he might have meetings to get to. Before, Tony would have seen it as a sign that his father didn’t care. Now, however, he knew that sometimes work did take precedence.

“Huh?”

“You know, the apartment.”

“Tony…”

“Come on, Rhodey. You have to move in, otherwise my parents won’t agree. They don’t want me to be by myself, and they really liked you.” He gave his friend his best puppy eyes and Rhodey sighed.

“Fine, I’ll come, but I’m not promising anything.”

“Yeah, sure.” Tony was going to convince him, he just knew it.

*****

Just a little over a month later, Tony and Rhodey were hauling their stuff into their new place, and Tony was bouncing all over the place in excitement. Mom, dad and Jarvis had come down to help him move and make sure he’d be all set. Once all their boxes were in (carried mostly by himself and Rhodey, since the adults were a bit on the old side), Howard announced that they should go out to dinner to celebrate, to which everyone readily agreed – moving was hungry work, after all.

Rhodey had eventually relented under the stipulation that he paid rent – an amount far below what the apartment was actually worth, but they were all ignoring that little fact. The place they had chosen was close to campus and had all the space Tony could want – including a third bedroom that Tony was going to turn into a workshop. It was going to be awesome.

His parents were in a great mood, and Tony was happy to see them smiling at each other almost sappily. It seemed that his dad was working on repairing his relationship with mom too, which Tony was very grateful for. It was nice to think that his parents actually cared about each other, since for a long time Tony hadn’t understood why his mom was still there at all. In his angriest moments, he had wished Maria would divorce Howard and it would be only her and Tony (though Jarvis would probably have stayed with dad, which Tony would have hated). Maybe they weren’t madly in love, but they looked a lot more comfortable together now.

“A toast,” Howard said, raising his glass. The rest of the table did likewise. “To Tony and James.” He gave Tony a sly grin and Tony had to fight not to squirm in embarrassment. As cool as it was to know that his dad didn’t disapprove, Tony still wasn’t entirely sure what to do with this… was it encouragement? teasing? he had been getting – and from everyone.

“And I hope you boys will be sensible and not set the place on fire the moment our backs are turned,” Maria added.

“Mom!” Tony whined.

“I know you, honey,” she said with a smile, shooting a quick glance at Howard. “In this you are just like your father.”

“Indeed,” Jarvis agreed.

While before Tony would have had mixed feelings about being compared to Howard, now he felt happy about it. It was nice to know he and Howard had things in common – even if, in this case, it wasn’t entirely a good thing.

“I have not set fire to the lab in ages,” Howard complained, with a half-hearted glare at Maria and Jarvis, which made Tony laugh.

Of course, that prompted Tony to ask about when Howard had set fire to the lab. He was only a little apprehensive as the question left his mouth; despite all their progress, Tony still worried sometimes that Howard was going to take something badly. In this case, fortunately, it was an unfounded fear, for Howard had no problem launching into a story of haphazard lab safety that had resulted in quite a bit of property damage before the fire was contained. They all laughed – Howard could be a surprisingly good storyteller, apparently. Jarvis added his own recollections in his usual dry delivery, which made the whole thing even funnier. Tony could count on one hand the times he remembered them all laughing together as a family, so it was wonderful to have more instances to add to his memory.

Unfortunately, Howard, Maria and Jarvis couldn’t stay very long; they all had work to get back to. They drove Tony and Rhodey back to their apartment, said their goodbyes and left.

“You know, your dad is a lot nicer than I thought,” Rhodey said as they finished setting things up in the living room.

“Yeah. He’s… Not the asshole I thought he was. I mean, he can be, sometimes. But he can also be pretty cool.” Their relationship was still a little tense on occasion, but it had improved enormously since the attack. Tony hoped it would continue to get better.

*****

Life in college settled easily with the new routine. Vince drove him (and Rhodey too, when their schedules coincided) to classes in the morning and hung around so he could take Tony back home at the end of the day. Tony could have gotten his own car – which he had wanted – but his parents had thought it was too dangerous. Before the masked man had tried to kill him, Tony would have been angry at that refusal. Now, however, he understood their concern. As annoying as it was to have his movements limited, he didn’t want to give the assassin any other opportunities to get at him again.

Unfortunately, that investigation really wasn’t going anywhere. Except for the weird resemblance to a guy long dead, the police and FBI had nothing. According to Howard, they had dismissed Barnes as a possible suspect, and there were no other leads. Dad’s list of enemies was pretty long and there was nothing to help narrow it down, so it was very slow going.

Thus Tony tried to focus on his own life. He remained cautious, of course, but it was far too exhausting to be worrying about a possible attack all the time.

Things with Rhodey were also going pretty well. So far Tony had managed to keep his crush undetected (or at least he hoped so), though sometimes it was hard. The fact that he was spending so much time working on the AI code and, as such, didn’t have a lot of opportunity to ogle his friend, was a good thing. Plus Rhodey did not go around shirtless, which was both disappointing (Tony had to get what he could, after all) and helpful.

A month after moving in, Tony flew home for the weekend at his mom’s request. While he had talked to his parents on the phone (yes, his father too; wasn’t that something?), it wasn’t the same as seeing them in person, and they were all still a bit too shaken to truly be comfortable without that visual reassurance.

Howard was looking much better, Tony noted. Mom said that he had gone to the doctor and gotten a new diet that he was actually following, as well as doing his best to sleep more. According to her, dad had begun to delegate some of his work to other people, giving him more time to dedicate to the things only he could do – and the things he actually enjoyed. Clearly all those changes were paying off. Tony hadn’t even noticed how old and haggard his dad had looked before, yet the contrast was astounding.

They went out to dinner as a family on Saturday, and it was nice. For the first time, Tony felt (mostly) confident in telling his father about his projects, and mom started talking about all of them going on vacation in the summer.

The last time they had had a family vacation had been just before Tony had started college, and it had been… well, a bit of a disaster. There had been a great deal of yelling between him and Howard on the very first day, and after that Howard had spent most of the time on the phone due to some emergency at SI. Mom had done her best to try to smooth things over, but Tony had ended up convinced his father had been trying to get rid of him by agreeing to send him to college – even though Tony had wanted to go to college.

So many misunderstandings, he thought now. If only he and dad had actually managed to talk to each other before… Well, Tony wasn’t sure it would have all been sunshine and roses, but… well, it might have been better.

In any case, this time he was looking forward to the holidays, and agreed with mom’s suggestion to go overseas, to either England or Italy – or both, depending on how much vacation time Howard could manage to get.

And there was Tony’s 18^th birthday coming up too.

“What do you want to do, honey?” his mom asked.

“I don’t know.” Tony gave a sideways glance at his father, wondering what he thought about it. Instead of fretting about it, though, he decided to just ask. “What do you think, dad?”

“Me? It’s your birthday.” He shrugged. “It’s your decision.”

Tony had thought dad would have wanted to make a big production of it, since 18 was an important milestone and all. On the other hand, he would have taken that apparently disinterested answer to mean that his dad didn’t give a crap. He knew better now. Dad had a point, it should be Tony’s decision, even if he wouldn’t mind some suggestions.

“I… I don’t know,” he repeated.

“Well, we still have plenty of time, honey, so you don’t have to decide anything now,” Maria said.

“Is it gonna to be just for us or… you know, the company and all?”

His parents traded a look Tony wasn’t sure how to interpret. “We can do something more… official,” his mom began, “but only if you’re comfortable with that.”

Tony nodded, a little surprised if he was being honest. They had always impressed upon him that company image was a really important thing, and any opportunity for good publicity should be seized. Perhaps they were still worried about the assassin, though, and wanted to minimize his exposure.

The waiter came by with their dessert, and Tony was glad for the chance to talk about something else. He would have to think some more about what he wanted for his birthday.

*****

After a lot of thought, Tony decided against a big party. He had never particularly enjoyed the few official parties he had gone to with his parents, and the thought of having to spend all night pretending he cared about a bunch of strangers who would only be there for the prestige of the event was not a pleasant one. Since his parents were willing to go with whatever he chose, he figured he might as well be selfish and just have a private little celebration. There would no doubt be occasions in the future when he would have to put the best interest of the company above his own, but that time was not now. For now that wasn’t his responsibly – and that was just as well.

For the first time in a long time, he was actually looking forward to his birthday, not only because he was about to be an adult, but also because he genuinely liked spending time with his family. It was going to be nice to have a day that was all about him, and get all the attention he had always wanted.

Rhodey, of course, was also coming to his birthday party. They were flying to New York together – which had taken some convincing, since Tony was using the company jet – and it was going to be awesome.

“Tony, are you ready?” Rhodey asked, hauling his suitcase into the living room with a slightly harried air. “We’re gonna be late.”

“We’re not gonna be late, Rhodey. The plane will only leave after we get there, remember?” Tony replied with a chuckle.

Rhodey made a face. “That’s no reason to not be on time. There is a schedule, and we should follow it.”

“That’s very military of you,” Tony commented with a smile, to which Rhodey responded by sticking his tongue out at him. God, Tony wanted to kiss him. He shook his head and turned away to get himself under control. “I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

This unrequited feeling business was a pain, he thought, not for the first time. For the most part, he had gotten used to it, but every now and then he got a pang of longing (and lust) that was very inconvenient.

Five minutes later, Vince helped them get their stuff in the car and they were off to the airstrip where they would be flying from. Tony convinced the pilot to let them in the cockpit and show them around. Rhodey knew a lot already, of course, being in the Air Force. He hadn’t flown by himself yet, but he would someday; he wanted to be a pilot. Tony intended to learn how to fly a plane himself (like his father did), but that was still a few years away. He knew the theory – and how to build a plane – but that was not the same as proper flying experience.

He remembered a time when he was maybe ten years old and was flying somewhere with his parents. He had asked his father to let him sit on the cockpit and watch how it was done, and Howard had said no. He had been angry and hurt at the denial, taking it (as he always did) as proof that his father didn’t care. Maybe Howard could have explained it better, but it was not an unreasonable decision. Tony would have probably have pestered the pilot during a time when they needed to be focused on their work. It was all a matter of communication in the end. If Howard had bothered to say why Tony wasn’t allowed to do this or that, he might have understood – or, at the very least, he wouldn’t have kept believing that his father just didn’t like him.

Fortunately, those days were behind him. Tony wasn’t a clueless kid anymore, and he and Howard were doing their best to talk and work things out. Maybe one day they could go flying together.

“That was pretty cool,” Rhodey said once they were back in their seats, having a snack.

Tony grinned. “Only the best for you, Rhodey-Bear.” He had no idea where all these silly nicknames came from, but lately he would open his mouth and something would just come out. As Rhodey didn’t seem to mind, he wasn’t too worried – in fact, it would probably help if he ever slipped one day and went for something a bit more intimate than was strictly warranted.

Damn those stupid feelings.

They arrived in New York without incident, and Vince drove them to the house. Tony had wanted to give the man time off while he was in New York, but his father insisted that Tony should have someone with him at all times, and Vince said he didn’t mind (he was getting handsomely paid for it, of course).

“We should do some sight-seeing later, since you’re here and all,” Tony told Rhodey.

“Sure.”

Jarvis was waiting at the gate for them. “Happy birthday, Master Tony.”

“Thanks, Jarvis.”

He offered Rhodey a hand. “Good to see you again, Mr Rhodes.”

“Yeah, you too.”

Then they went into the house proper and his mom almost crushed him with her hug. “Oh, honey, happy birthday. I can’t believe you’re 18 now. Seems like yesterday I was changing your diapers.”

“Mom!” Tony whined, though he was smiling.

“You were such a cute baby, and now look at you. A grown man – and so handsome too.”

Tony couldn’t help a little blush at that, shooting Rhodey a sideways glance. “Thanks, mom.”

“Hey, there’s the birthday boy.” Howard came down the stairs, grinning at Tony’s discomfort. “All grown up now. I feel old.”

“That’s because you are old,” Tony retorted, and his father chuckled. Tony felt warmth flood his chest at the thought that he and his dad could joke with each other now.

“Happy birthday, Tony.” He extended a hand to Rhodey. “Good to see you, James.”

“You too, Sir. Ma’am.” He nodded at mom, who moved forward to embrace him.

“No need to be so formal, dear. You can call me Maria.” She winked at Tony behind Rhodey’s back, making him squirm in embarrassment. As glad as he was that his parents seemed to be so supportive of him, it was still… weird. Part of him wished his parents had no idea about his little crush, since he was pretty sure they were going to keep teasing him about it.

“You boys can go run around while we finish up some preparations,” Howard said.

Tony rolled his eyes. “Dad, we’re not children.” But he grabbed Rhodey’s arm and dragged him off before his dad could say something else to embarrass him.

Rhodey had already seen the house the last time he had come over, so there was no need for another tour. Instead, he took Rhodey to the pool in the back. It was not warm enough yet to actually go in the water, but it was nice to just sit around in the deck chairs and chat for a bit.

The party was not so much a party as a fancy dinner. Tony didn’t actually have a lot of friends – well, he only had Rhodey – so it wasn’t like he had a lot of people to invite if it wasn’t going to be a formal affair. Aside from his parents, Jarvis and Rhodey, Obadiah had also come.

“Hey, Obie, haven’t seen you in ages,” Tony said. In fact, Tony hadn’t even noticed how long it had been since he’d seen Obie until the man was right in front of him. His father’s business partner used to come to the house more often, now that he thought about it. Had Howard had some falling out with him? Maybe Tony should ask later. He should take an interest in his dad’s life too.

“Tony, my boy. Big day, huh?”

“Yeah.”

Obie brought him a box of cigars as a birthday present, which made Maria purse her lips.

“Really, Obadiah?”

“He’s a man now, Maria,” Obie laughed.

“That doesn’t mean he should start developing bad habits.”

But Obie ignored her and turned back to Tony. “Bet you’re getting all the girls at that fancy school of yours, aren’t you?”

Tony gave him a slightly strained smile. He’d had a few dates and some hook-ups in parties and such, but not really that much. It was clear to him that most people only spoke to him because they wanted something, and that took the fun out of it. And there was Rhodey – though Tony had no intention of telling Obie about that.

“I do all right,” he said with a shrug.

“And that’s enough of that kind of talk,” Maria intervened, and Tony allowed himself to relax. “Come on, honey.” She gave Obie one last glare and took Tony’s arm to lead him to the dining room, where Rhodey was talking to dad.

The evening was quite pleasant, despite a few awkward comments from Obie – including one about the lack of alcohol that Maria got pretty pissed about. The food was wonderful, and conversation flowed easily enough. Still, Tony was glad when Obie left after dinner.

“What’s going on with Obie?” he asked his father in his study a little while later when the two of them were alone.

Howard shrugged. “I don’t know, really. I think he’s angry with me, but I have no idea why. I guess he’s just stressed. The whole assassin thing has had us all rattled.”

“No news on that?”

“No, I’m afraid not. I’m still looking into it, but… there are no leads.” He sighed. “Anyway, come on. I want to give you your birthday present.”

“It’s not the car?” His parents had given him the keys to a brand new Aston Martin earlier. It was a pretty awesome car, and Tony couldn’t wait to be able to drive it, even though he’d probably have to leave New York to get some proper speed going.

“Well, yes, but I have something else for you.” He rummaged in a drawer and picked up a set of keys, which he tossed to Tony. “Here.”

“What are these for?” They weren’t car keys, just regular keys.

“Come with me.”

Tony followed his father to his workshop, which he opened with one of the keys.

“I’m trusting you with everything in here, so please be careful.”

Oh, shit, Tony thought. As a child, he had wanted desperately to be allowed into his father’s workshop. He’d wanted to see Howard work and work alongside him. He’d wanted to be a part of his dad’s life the way his work seemed to be. He wasn’t a child anymore, and even though their relationship had improved considerable in the past few months, he was still touched by the gesture. It wasn’t just about trust – though that meant a lot to him – but about being included.

“Thanks, dad,” he said, trying to keep his voice level and not start crying like a baby.

Howard nodded, looking a bit uncomfortable himself. Neither of them were very good at this mushy stuff, Tony thought ruefully. “There’s one more thing.”

“More?”

They locked the workshop, and then they went outside to the garden shed. Except the shed seemed quite a lot bigger than it used to be. “It’s a bit improvised for now, but you can adjust it the way you want it.” With the other key, Howard opened the door and turned on the lights.

It was… well, a new workshop. Smaller than his dad’s yes, but… It was for him. Tony looked at his father in awe.

“I thought you could use a space of your own to work. Not that I don’t want you to use my workshop,” he hastened to add, “but, well… it’s good to have something of your own.”

“Thanks, dad.” He hesitated for just a moment before launching into a hug. “It’s awesome!” He couldn’t wait to be home so he could start using this. It was going to be amazing!

Chapter Text

Howard had called in every favor he had to find out more about the assassin, and so far he had gotten pretty much nothing. Even though he knew it was next to impossible for the man to have been Barnes, Howard remained convinced that it was. He didn’t know how – and he didn’t care how irrational it seemed – he just… had a feeling. Normally, Howard wasn’t given to ‘feelings’. He was a scientist first and foremost, and he relied on hard, quantifiable data most of the time. However, there had been some instances in his life when something had just… felt right. After all, intuition was simply taking subconscious clues and making it into a certainty without the usual rational steps.

Still, his gut feeling was useless unless he had some evidence to back it up.

The problem was that, even if he could somehow prove that the masked man was Barnes, it didn’t really help him much. Knowing ‘who’ still didn’t tell him ‘why’ – plus, if it was indeed Barnes, something had to have happened to him to turn him from a loyal soldier to… that. Getting the assassin’s identity was only the first step in the investigation. Finding out who had sent him and what they had been after was even more important.

Stealing the serum seemed the most likely goal, and that had been thwarted. Howard had been assured by the Pentagon guys more than once (because he had kept insisting) that the serum was safe, and would not leave the building for the foreseeable future. Whatever experiments the army had been planning to make had been put on hold until they knew more about the situation. Considering how secure the Pentagon was, Howard was reasonably sure that at least he wouldn’t have to worry about the serum falling into the wrong hands. However, it did not make him worry any less about the serum’s actual existence; the potential for harm remained far too high in his opinion.

God, he wished he had never agreed to work on it in the first place.

Well, it was too late for regrets now.

Aside from the frustration of the investigation, though, Howard really couldn’t complain too much. Tony was doing fine in college, and Vince had not reported anything too worrying. There had been a few would-be photographers trying to get some compromising pictures at parties, but nothing that couldn’t be handled with a little physical intimidation and the threat of lawsuits. Howard was very pleased with Vince so far, and was glad he was keeping an eye on Tony.

Tony’s birthday last month had gone quite well, and Howard was looking forward to spending more time with his son over the summer.

The atmosphere in the house had also improved tremendously. He and Maria were back to rights (sharing a bedroom once again), and even Jarvis was in a better mood these days – probably because he didn’t have to deal with a drunken and snappy Howard. Peggy had, fortunately, not bothered him again, though Howard wasn’t holding out hope that he had gotten rid of her for good; she was probably just biding her time until she made another attempt to change his mind. Well, she could do what she wanted, it would make no difference.

Now that he had a bit more time, for himself and for the company, Howard had begun going over some of the things he had been neglecting. He’d needed to be on top of everything so he would be able to delegate what he could and pay closer attention to what he couldn’t. It was a tough balancing act, and one that demanded a lot of initial energy – which was why he had put it off for so long. Now, however, he was in a better frame of mind to get to it.

Brenda had made a few very helpful suggestions that had helped him get started. She really was a godsend, and he made a mental note to see about getting her a raise. After putting up with him for ten years, she certainly deserved it.

Sorting things out in his office was the easy part – Brenda had that well in hand already, and just needed his okay to implement the ideas she had already had. The R&D department was also in pretty good shape. Dr Litchfield, the department head, was really smart, and he knew how to handle his subordinates to always get the most out of them while keeping them motivated and engaged. Every time Howard showed up to inspect something, he found it all running smoothly.

There were other departments, however, that Howard hadn’t been keeping very good tabs on. Marketing and Accounting were under Obie’s purview, so Howard had never worried too much about them. Obie could be pretty ruthless, but he had a great head for business and how to make a profit. Nevertheless, Howard figured it would be a good thing to check it all out. He had promised to give Tony an overview of the entire company when he came for his summer internship, and that meant Howard needed to be familiar with all of it himself.

“Brenda,” he said into the intercom, “set up a meeting with all the department heads for two weeks from now. Tell them I want a small presentation on each of their departments, complete with overview of all new personnel and projects, and suggestions for improvements.”

“Of course, Mr Stark.”

It was short notice, but sometimes it was good to set a little fire under people’s butts to see how they did under pressure.

The issue with Obie was still unresolved, though. Howard hoped Obie would sort out whatever was going on with him – or at least tell him what the problem was. Asking hadn’t gotten him anywhere so far, unfortunately. Obie was as stubborn as Howard himself, and refused to admit to any problems. Honestly, he was getting a little fed up with it. He’d give it a little more time, then he would have to force a conversation.

He went back to the schematics he had been working on, thanking Brenda when she came in with his afternoon coffee and a couple of sandwiches (as per doctor’s orders). It was nice to be able to get back into inventing without feeling the anxiety that had plagued him for the last couple of years.

The phone ringing took him out of the zone, and he picked it up with an irritated huff. “Mr Stark, you have a call. They say it’s urgent,” Brenda told him.

“Ok, put it through.”

“Stark, it’s Flincher,” the man on the other side of the line said, making Howard sit up straight immediately. General Flincher (retired) had been one of the people he had called about the assassin. He had served under Phillips during the war, and had then steadily climbed through the ranks. Though he had not been part of Project Rebirth, he had nevertheless done a lot of important work at the time gathering intel. Flincher was smart and had an excellent memory, and he knew a lot of people in all branches of the military. What Howard really liked about him was the fact that he never got bogged down in politics, and was known for being fair and blunt without ruffling too many feathers.

“You have something?” Howard asked, foregoing the pleasantries and going straight to the point.

“To be honest, I don’t know what I have. It’s all rumors for now, but…” he trailed off. Howard could imagine him shaking his head the way the man usually did when he was stumped on something.

“I’ll take anything.”

“Yeah, I thought you might. Can you come to DC? This is the kind of thing that needs to be discussed in person.”

Flincher had never been the paranoid type, so for him to be reluctant to discuss the matter over the phone, there had to be some possible dangers involved. Or perhaps the information was too sensitive. Howard had high clearance despite the fact that he was neither in the military nor a politician, but there was always a lot he didn’t know about what went on behind the scenes.

“I’ll have to check my schedule, but I think I can make it,” he answered, already mentally going through his appointments for the rest of the week to see what could be rescheduled.

“Good. Let me know when.”

As soon as he hung up the phone, Howard called Brenda in to get her to free up some time for him as soon as possible for a trip to DC.

He did not tell Maria why he was going to DC when he announced it later that night. He didn’t actually know anything useful yet, and he didn’t want her to worry.

On Friday evening, he met Flincher at the man’s house. He was offered a drink, which he refused – though he was very tempted (it had been getting easier to ignore the urge to drink, but the situation was putting him on edge again; he was glad Flincher didn’t insist).

“So, what do you have?” he asked. The sooner he got whatever information Flincher had, the sooner he could make plans to protect his family. Not knowing was making him crazy.

“Like I said, this is all rumors.” Howard made an impatient gesture for the man to continue. “There is a man called ‘The Winter Soldier’. An assassin, possibly Russian, though no one knows for sure.”

Howard had never heard that name, but that didn’t mean anything. He had always left the intel gathering to Peggy and the military high-ups.

“And what makes you think this Winter Soldier is my guy?”

“I couldn’t find any images from this man, but the description involved a mask over the lower part of his face and, and I quote, “cold, dead eyes”.”

Howard couldn’t help flinch a little. That was what Tony had said about the man who had attacked him. “Who gave that description?”

“A witness.” Flincher leaned back in his chair. “There have been rumors circulating about this masked assassin for about a decade, but no one ever knew much. Whoever he is, the guy is good – and discrete. In, out, mission accomplished with no witnesses and no evidence. A couple of years ago, however, someone was saw something criminal and managed to survive.”

“If he’s that good, what happened?”

“According to the witness, a Mr Paul Kent, it was pure chance. His car broke down and he had to hike up some deserted road to find a phone and some shelter. He came upon the assassin disposing of a body near a remote cabin that belonged to the victim. It was still day time, so he got a good look at the guy before he ran for his life.”

“Did the assassin chase him?”

“Yes, but Kent got to the road before the masked man caught up with him. Just then, a ranger’s patrol car was driving by, and Kent flagged them down. The assassin disappeared into the woods.”

Howard took a deep breath. “Who was the victim?”

“A man called Lincoln Graves, a banker with a lot of shady deals.”

“Any idea why he was targeted?”

“The man had too many enemies, so it was hard to narrow down who might have ordered a hit on him.”

Well, that was familiar. “Was anything stolen from Graves?”

Flincher nodded. “Yeah. Lots of information about Graves’s clients, as well as passwords to where he kept his off shore accounts. Two days later, the money was all gone, all accounts cleaned up. The investigation was able to determine that the person who went to the bank to the get the money was not the assassin, but the trail went cold and there were no more leads. The case remains unsolved.”

“And Kent?”

“After he gave his statement, he was released. Police ruled him out as a suspect. He was only passing through the area, so he went home. Six months later he was killed in what appeared to be a street mugging.”

Howard exhaled sharply. That was not good. Not fucking good at all. It meant Tony might still be a target.

Fuck.

“There was no proof that Kent was killed by the masked assassin. It could have just been a random robbery that got violent,” Flincher said, though he didn’t seem very convinced of that possibility.

Neither men said anything for a while, and Howard eyed the bourbon in Flincher’s hands with longing. Damn, he could use a drink. Keep your head, Howard, he told himself firmly. Now is not the time to go back to your old ways. He thought of Tony’s smiling face when he talked about the upcoming internship. He had already messed up far too much, and Tony deserved better. He deserved a father who would put him first, who would be there for him when he needed it, instead of losing himself in the bottle.

“Anything else?” Howard asked, hands clenched in his lap.

Flincher hesitated a beat before continuing. “There might be someone in a high position aware of this supposed assassin.”

Well, double fuck. It never rained but it poured.

“What makes you say that?”

“I’ve been hearing some… troubling things. Evidence that’s gone missing, reports misfiled, witnesses that disappear without a trace…”

“In the FBI?”

“That’s the problem. It’s too widespread. There are issues in the FBI, in several local PDs, even some military investigation over missing shipments.” Flincher sighed. “It could be nothing. It could simply be individual corruption, but… my gut says there’s something more going on.”

“Someone who has fingers in all kinds of pies, you mean,” Howard surmised.

“Yes. But I have no idea who it could be, or why these particular investigations were tampered with. There doesn’t seem to be anything connecting them. None of the same people or organizations involved, or even the same personnel attached to the investigative teams.”

“How do you know all this?”

Flincher shrugged. “I know people. These people tell me things. Sometimes things they are afraid to tell their superiors. I don’t have all the details of these… suspicious incidents, but enough to see there might be a problem somewhere.”

Howard nodded thoughtfully. “What are you planning to do about this?”

“Honestly? I have no idea. I don’t know who to trust. And even the people I do trust… well, I’m not sure I want to get anyone involved until I have something a bit more concrete. I was hoping perhaps you could help me.”

“Me?” Howard asked, surprised. “I’m not part of any agency.” SHIELD didn’t count. Even if he was still there – which he wasn’t – he had never been part of the investigative side of it.

“You know people too. You could put out some feelers, see what people tell you.”

“I have done that – sort of – with this assassin business. You’re the only one who had anything to say.” Howard paused, thinking it over. “But with a bit more to go with, I could try again. See if anyone else has heard of this ‘Winter Soldier’.”

“Will you keep me informed?”

“Yeah, sure.” After a slight hesitation, Howard went on. “I worked on something for the military recently – what I think the assassin might have been after. Have you heard anything about… super soldiers?”

Flincher frowned. “You mean, like Captain America?”

Howard suppressed the urge to sigh. For the longest time, he had thought Project Rebirth was the best thing he had ever done. More than any of the awful weapons he had developed, helping to change Steve Rogers into a super soldier was something he could be proud of. Now… now he wasn’t so sure any more. Yes, Captain America had been a great asset against Hydra during the war, there was no doubt about that, but… If Steve had survived to modern day… what would have happened? What would he have become? Once the war was over, what would have been there for a super soldier to do? Look for the next war? But then that would have been part of the Cold War too, wouldn’t it? It would have been a race to develop not just weapons of mass destruction, but enhanced soldiers as well – and Howard was under no illusions that ethics and morality wouldn’t have been tossed out the window in that pursuit. It was why he had been so reluctant to take up the project again in the first place. The potential for harm was far too great – and Howard had learned that lesson with the damn A-bomb.

The military had used Steve as a justification – “look what a success that was!” – and Howard just wasn’t sure. Steve had been a good guy, yes, but… Well, those had hardly been normal circumstances. Who knows what might have happened? What if there were long-term side effects from the serum? They had no idea what something like that could do to the human body.

(God, anything could have happened. The experiment could have gone horribly wrong and they would have murdered an innocent guy who had only wanted to serve his country.)

“Howard?”

Flincher’s voice brought him back to the present, and Howard shook his head. He didn’t like thinking about this anymore. Unfortunately, the assassin’s resemblance to Barnes had unearthed a lot of memories.

“Sorry, I was… woolgathering. Yes, like Captain America.”

“No, I don’t think so. I thought that was done. That Steve Rogers was the only one.”

“Supposedly, yes. But… Who knows?”

If the assassin was really Barnes, that meant he had to have been given some form of the super soldier serum, or he wouldn’t still be alive and looking like he did 50 years ago. And that meant someone still had access to some formula, even if it wasn’t the same as Erskine’s. Clearly Barnes was no longer acting as a US soldier, so someone else was pulling his strings – that was, someone else had the serum. Russians? Germans? Who?

It was not a good thing.

“I’ll keep an ear out for that, then,” Flincher said, and they lapsed into silence. After a few minutes, Flincher spoke again. “Do you have anything more on the assassin? Anything that could help narrow it down a little more?”

Howard was not a person who trusted easily. As a businessman (and a rich man) he was well aware that people always had an agenda for everything they did. That didn’t necessarily mean they were being deceitful all the time, but it did make him cautious about what he revealed and to whom. On the other hand, being the lone gunman hadn’t really been doing him many favors in the last few decades. Perhaps he could have found a better way to cope with all the demands piled up on him if he had shared some of his burdens with Maria or Jarvis. But he hadn’t wanted to bother them – and he hadn’t wanted to seem weak in their eyes. Now that he had, though, he did not feel weak at all (well, maybe sometimes; it was still a work in progress). For the most part, he was glad that he had begun to open up to them, and to Tony. He couldn’t solve all problems by himself, and perhaps having someone else working on it would help him get to an answer sooner – and thus keep his family safe.

It was worth a shot, wasn’t it? Hoping he wouldn’t regret this, Howard told Flincher about his theory about the identity of the assassin. As expected, Flincher didn’t seem very convinced.

“I don’t have the images with me now, but I’ll send them to you and you can see for yourself.”

“Barnes was considered dead, though.”

“Yes, I know. But his body was never found.” Granted, no one had ever actually looked for him; there was no way to really do that, and at the time resources had been rather limited. No one could have imagined that he could have survived a fall like that. “I saw Steve do some pretty amazing things,” Howard continued. “He took a bullet to the leg once, and was perfectly fine by the next day, with barely a scar to show for it.”

Flincher leaned back and stapled his fingers, thinking.

“If he was given the serum, I suppose it might be possible – and you’d know better than me what the serum is capable of. It is worrying, though.”

“Yes, it is,” Howard agreed. “If we put it together with your suspicions, it’s even worse.”

“We don’t know that those two things are connected.”

“There has to be at least some connection.”

“But if the assassin is Barnes, then whoever is pulling his strings already has the serum. Or at least a version of it. Why would they need to steal yours?”

“Maybe they don’t want anyone else to have it.”

“I guess that’s possible, yeah.”

“Or they’re looking to improve it. Maybe there is something wrong with the one they have.”

Flincher nodded. “Also possible.”

They lapsed into silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Howard was beginning to get a really bad feeling about all this.

“Did anyone ever thought of a… counter-serum?” Flincher asked at last. “If someone else has it – Russia or whoever – we need to have some way to defend ourselves.”

That was a good idea, and one that honestly hadn’t occurred to Howard. “Not that I know of. I don’t think anyone ever considered that a super soldier could be used against us. I’ll think about it.”

There wasn’t much more to say after that, so Howard thanked Flincher for all his information and left.

*****

While his conversation with Flincher remained in the back of his mind, Howard went back to focusing on work. There was a lot to do in order to make the company ready to turn to a new direction. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but he also knew it was the right thing to do. More than that, it was what he wanted to do. In a few short years, Tony would inherit it, and Howard wanted to leave his son a better legacy than just weapons.

His meeting with the department heads went well enough, and most seemed on board with a few changes in the upcoming years. There were plenty of new ideas, Howard was happy to note, and a great deal of enthusiasm for the future. Technology was advancing at a rapid pace now, and Stark Industries should be at the forefront of all innovations. There was a whole new market out there that they could explore.

There was one person who did not seem happy at all with Howard’s new policies, however.

Obadiah flat out told him he was insane and these decisions would drive the company into the ground.

“You’ve gone soft in your old age, Howard,” he said. “You’ve lost what it takes to lead.”

Perhaps if Howard had still been feeling like shit, he would have taken that criticism to heart and started second-guessing himself. But with his new-found optimism and general contentment, he let it slide. Obie was a traditionalist, so of course it was going to take some convincing for him to see that this could be a golden opportunity for them.

“I understand your concern, Obie, but you’re not looking at the big picture. Diversity is the way of the future. I’m not saying we’ll stop weapons completely, but it’s time to do more.”

“Weapons sell, Howard. That’s what matters.”

Howard rolled his eyes. “Other things sell too.”

“This is a big mistake.”

“You don’t know that. I know it’s a risk, but it’s one I’ll willing to take.”

Obie sneered and stormed out, and Howard wondered when the man had turned into such a drama queen. Honestly, it wasn’t as if the company was on the verge of bankruptcy. They could afford to take a few chances.

So Howard spent some time going over some proposals for new products with all the departments to see what seemed more promising as a start. It was a lot of work, and he was honestly surprised when Maria said Tony would be coming home for the summer in a couple of days; he had completely lost track of time.

“You aren’t going to be working the whole time he’s home, are you?” she asked with an admonishing tone. She had said similar things to him in the past – pretty much every summer, in fact – and he had pretty much ignored her. Not because he didn’t want to spent time with Tony, but because he had always felt like he had a million things to do and they were all important. Sure, they were (for the most part, at least; Howard couldn’t really say that SHIELD was that important now) but so was Tony, and Howard should have made more of an effort to prioritize his son, no matter how difficult their relationship had been at times.

“No,” Howard replied. Then added after a short pause: “maybe a bit, but Tony will be there with me. I intend to get him up to speed on everything that’s going on with the company.”

Because of the internship – and Tony’s enthusiasm about it – they had decided to postpone their vacation plans a little. Plus, Howard didn’t think this was the best time for him to be away from the office. Hopefully things would be more settled by Christmas.

Maria sighed.

Howard frowned, confused by her reaction. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“Come on, what’s the matter? If I’m doing something wrong, you have to tell me.” And this time he would listen.

“It’s not that. I’m sure Tony will be thrilled.”

“Then what?” He still didn’t understand.

“It’s just that… you have your work and inventions and all to share with Tony. He’s a grown man now, and… well, he doesn’t need his mother anymore, does he?”

Howard had no idea what to say to that. He’d always thought that Tony got along better with Maria, so it had never occurred to him that she might be worried about them growing apart.

“Tony adores you, Maria,” he said at last.

“I know, but… we don’t have much in common. Most of the time, I don’t even understand what he’s talking about. When he was younger it was easier to do things together, but now…”

“I’m sure you can find something.” Howard thought for a moment. “You’re a lot better at the public relations part than me, and he could use your help in understanding that.”

Maria gave him a tentative smile. “Yes, I suppose you’re right. Thank you, dear.”

It was a bit of an odd role reversal, but perhaps it was a good sign. It meant they could help each other and find different ways of connecting with their son. And on a purely selfish note, Howard was glad to have something go easier for him for once.

Chapter Text

Tony was excited for his summer vacation for the first time in a really long time. Not only would he get to spend time with his dad at SI on his internship – which was going to be awesome – but he would get to hang out with him at home too. Tony had a key to his father’s workshop now, and an invitation to go in any time he wanted. Of course he would have to be careful of the dangerous (and confidential) stuff in there, but it was still wonderful to know his presence wasn’t going to be an unwanted burden.

He was also excited to use his own workshop, and personalize it any way he wanted. It would be nice to invite his father to spend time there with him as well.

The one downside of summer was that Rhodey would be going home to his own family, and Tony wasn’t likely to see him for a while. Sure, they were going to keep in touch on the phone – and perhaps they could even arrange a visit – but it wasn’t the same. After months of living together, Tony was going to miss having him around.

His stupid crush didn’t seem to be going anywhere soon, though, so perhaps it was for the best that they got a bit of time apart. So far Tony thought he had been doing a decent job of keeping his feelings hidden, and there weren’t many awkward moments. Of course it helped that they had both been busy with finals in the last couple of weeks to do much socializing. Tony wasn’t all that social to begin with, really, because most people were only interested in Tony for his fortune. Rhodey also (thankfully) wasn’t the party animal a lot of their classmates were. He’d been on a few dates during the time Tony had known him, but there had been no serious relationships, for which Tony was grateful since he wasn’t sure how he’d handle that.

The last day of class was pretty uneventful. Tony had already finished all his papers and projects – at least as much as he was able to do using the college lab – so he was just going through the motions, waiting until it was time to go home.

“All set, Tony?” Rhodey asked when Tony came into the living room after finishing his packing.

“Yep. Vince will be here tomorrow at 9 to take me to the airport.” He couldn’t keep the grin off his face.

Rhodey smiled back. “It’s good to see you so excited.”

“Yeah. It’s great to be getting along with dad.” He settled in the couch next to his friend, ignoring the thudding of his heart at the proximity with the ease of long practice. “Are you excited about going home?”

“Yeah, though I’m sure my mom is going to put me to work the moment I get there. She always leaves all the house repairs for when I’m home.” Rhodey shook his head fondly.  Rhodey’s father had passed away a couple of years ago, so it was just him and his mom now. “I keep telling her I’m an engineer, not a handy man, but she never listens.”

“What kind of stuff does she have you fix? I mean, if you need help, you can call me.”

“Or maybe you can come over for a few days and do it yourself. Mom’s been bugging me about meeting you for ages.”

Tony’s heart skipped a beat, though he kept his cool. “Sure, sounds great.” It wasn’t a big deal, he told himself. Didn’t mean anything except that Rhodey’s mom was curious about him. Unfortunately.

The next day, they said their goodbyes and Tony got on a plane to New York with one more cool thing to look forward to in the summer.

What more could a guy ask for?

*****

Tony’s first week home was spent setting up his new workshop. That included organizing space for a lot of equipment (which he had previously ordered and which had already been delivered), and sorting out his work area to his satisfaction. Then there were some tools he had to build himself to be exactly what he needed.

He didn’t let his father in until he was done, though he couldn’t really say why. Tony did his best not to second-guess himself about any of it, reminding himself that it was his space, and his father wasn’t going to criticize it – or, at least, not in a derogatory way. Still, he couldn’t deny he was a little bit worried when he was finally ready invite his family inside.

“Okay, come on in,” he told his parents and Jarvis.

“It looks great, Tony,” Howard said after a quick glance through. He moved to one of the workbenches and picked up one of the tools Tony had made. “What’s this for?”

Tony explained the intended use, and Howard hummed thoughtfully. He continued inspecting the rest of the space, and Tony turned to his mom and Jarvis.

“What do you think?”

“It seems nice, honey.” She looked a little lost. “Does it have everything you need?”

Tony nodded. “For now. I mean, I’ll probably need to add stuff whenever the need arises, but I’m good now. I’ll finally be able to finish my robot.” He had presented it as his final project already, but there were still improvements to be made. Some fine-tuning that would make it even better than it already was – which was impressive, if he said so himself. He could have hurried it and had it done before the end of classes, but he’d decided to take a little more time on that final stage. Now that the unrelenting need to get his father’s approval wasn’t driving his every move, it was easier to get a more accurate perspective of what he had to do, and a better frame of mind in which to do it.

“Well, I guess we’ll leave you to it,” Howard said. He clapped Tony on the shoulder with a smile.

“Yeah.”

Tony had to suppress the disappointment that his dad wasn’t going to stay longer, but he understood. Howard had work to do, he couldn’t be hanging about with Tony all day. They were going to spend time together later, it would be fine.

*****

“How are things going with James?” Howard asked.

“Huh?” Tony raised his head from the piece he’d been soldering to look at his father.

They were in his dad’s workshop. Tony had decided to test his welcome, and so far it was going pretty well. Each of them was focused on their own work, sure, but there was still some conversation from time to time. It had mostly been about work, though, so the new topic caught Tony by surprise.

“How are things going with James?” Howard repeated.

Tony shrugged. “The same.” He paused. “I know nothing is going to happen. Rhodey’s not interested in me that way.” Even if Rhodey wasn’t straight – and he definitely was, sadly – he still seemed to think of Tony as a kid. Despite the fact that Tony was now legally an adult, Rhodey was still treating him like a little brother. It was… nice, but not really what Tony wanted. It was kind of funny, since he’d spent a good chunk of his childhood wishing for a brother, and now that he sort of had one, it wasn’t… well, it wasn’t the kind of relationship he wanted with Rhodey.

“I’m sorry,” his dad said, and he sounded sincere. It warmed Tony’s heart.                                                                                                                     

“It is what it is.” Not that Tony wouldn’t jump at the chance for more if it was ever offered to him, but he had, for the most part, resigned himself to reality. He had a great friend, and that had to be enough. At least he knew it wasn’t because there was anything wrong or lacking with him specifically – Rhodey just didn’t see Tony that way.

“Well, I’m sure you’ll find someone. You’re still pretty young, there’s no reason to rush.”

“Did you…” Tony paused, unsure if he wanted to have this conversation. The truth was that he didn’t actually know all that much about his father’s personal life before he married his mom – aside from what he’d heard in the media, which was hardly reliable.

“Did I what?” Howard’s expression was open and relaxed, and he seemed willing to talk, so Tony figured he might as well take the plunge.

“Did you have anyone… like, serious, before mom?”

Howard sighed, turning his attention back to the circuit he was assembling. “Serious? No, not really.” Tony waited, and after a while his dad continued. “I didn’t really have the opportunity for that, I guess.”

“Why not?”

“Well, I was busy a lot of the time, and… everyone who showed an interest seemed to have… ulterior motives.” They had had that depressing talk already.

“Yeah,” Tony nodded. Rhodey had been the only person who didn’t immediately try to get something from Tony the moment they met.

“There was this woman once,” Howard went on. “She seemed genuine and said all the right things. I thought… I thought it might have gone somewhere.”

“But?” Tony prompted when his father lapsed into silence.

“But then I caught her trying to sneak into the lab. Fortunately, she didn’t notice me, so I was able to go through her things and get back some photos she’d taken before I sent her packing. She didn’t get anything very important, but… Anyway, I didn’t let on that I knew what she was, though, just… acted like I’d had enough and was ready to move on to the next… conquest.” He shook his head. “Later, I thought back to everything she’d said and done, and used that to make sure I wouldn’t be fooled again.” He looked at Tony. “We all make mistakes, Tony, and sometimes trust the wrong people. The trick is to learn from it so you don’t fall into the same trap twice.”

“And how do I do that? I don’t think… I don’t think I’m very good with people.” It wasn’t an admission he would ever have considered making before, yet now he felt much more comfortable talking to Howard, and being less than perfect. His father wasn’t perfect either, and was clearly willing to admit it too.

“It takes time, you just… learn to see some patterns. And… I guess… lean on the people you do trust, who might see more than you do, sometimes. It’s not foolproof, though, and… It can be exhausting, waiting for deceit at every corner. So, don’t give too much of yourself – at least until you’re sure it’s not going to be used against you.”

Tony had already figured most of that out on his own, of course, but it was a bit… disheartening, to hear it from his father as well. It meant he would likely have to deal with this all his life, and he could see now how something like that could weigh heavily on a person. It was easier now, to understand his father’s distance. Still sucked, of course, but maybe it had never had anything to do with Tony personally.

“Okay,” he said.

He got a somewhat bittersweet smile in return. “It’s not all bad, though,” Howard said, obviously trying to lighten the mood. “Our position does come with a lot of advantages, along with the pitfalls.”

“Yeah.” He returned the smile for a moment, then sobered up again. “Speaking of pitfalls… Any word on the assassin?”

Howard let out a sigh of frustration. “Nothing solid. There are some rumors and possible leads, but nothing has panned out so far. I’m keeping an eye out.”

“What about the police?”

Howard snorted. “They’ve got less than nothing. This is way too big for them. They handed it over to the FBI, and that’s who I’m in contact with. That and… some acquaintances in the military, though nothing official.”

Tony murmured an assent. The idea that the assassin was still out there was a little nerve-wrecking, though he tried not to think about it too much. If course he was being cautious, but seeing threats at every corner wouldn’t be conductive to his health or peace of mind. He had to trust that his dad and whoever else were doing what they could about it.

For the next few minutes, they each concentrated on their own work. It was nice to be around his dad like this; either working or talking in a relaxed sort of way. Tony had nothing to prove anymore, so he could just… be.

“Are you looking forward to starting your internship on Monday?” Howard asked at last.

“Yeah!” Tony replied immediately, and shared a grin with his father. He had been counting the days since he’d gotten home, and that countdown was finally coming to an end. As he wanted to be fully prepared, he had read through the last quarterly reports and familiarized himself with the whole company structure. While Tony didn’t really want to be CEO (that sounded very boring), he did want to show his dad he could be trusted with the company, that he knew what running it would entail. A part of that was, perhaps, some leftover desire for praise and recognition, but most of it was genuine.

Over the last few months since his improved relationship with Howard, Tony had come to realize that being CEO was a really tough job, and he had to admire his father for building the company as he had, especially considering his humble beginnings and the all challenges he’d faced. And Howard hadn’t just built it, but had kept it going and growing – and now also diversifying, which could be seen as a rather risky move.

Howard had actually discussed the idea with Tony over the last week, and had asked for Tony’s suggestions on what kind of tech SI could develop. It was the first time Tony had been consulted, and he had been a bit tongue-tied. Not because he had any shortage of ideas, but because he was still a tiny bit wary of being dismissed by his father.

He’d gotten over it quickly, however, and had presented his thoughts the next day. The ideas were mostly related to computers, as that was his favorite field at the moment. Howard had listened attentively, which had made Tony ridiculously happy, and said he liked the suggestions, though implementing them would require a great deal more work. That was part of what Tony was hoping to accomplish during his internship: he wanted to learn how to get an idea from the paper to an actual product that they could market and sell, which involved a lot of steps, such as considering the best materials to work with, the cost of production and dealing with all the problems that would inevitably arise once he actually began building something.

It would be a challenge, but one Tony thought he was ready to tackle.

*****

Three weeks into his internship, Tony was having a fantastic time. He’d been introduced to all the department heads and spent a couple of days in each department to get a feel for what they did and how they worked. Some were kind of boring, but he knew everything was important, so he did his best to learn as much as he could.

His favorite, of course, was the Research & Development department. They were in charge of actually doing stuff, and watching them work was fascinating and exciting. And, because the people there were mostly a bunch of nerds, Tony felt like he fit right in. In truth, he had expected a bit more wariness from the workers there – not everyone was probably interested in indulging the boss’s kid, genius or not. Instead, he was welcomed and encouraged to join a couple of projects. At first, Tony had kept a respectful distance and simply observed, but after a few days he began feeling a bit more comfortable to share his ideas. Nothing earth shattering yet, of course, though Dr Litchfield seemed pleased anyway.

All in all, Tony was having a blast.

The one downside was that he hadn’t gotten to spend as much time with Howard as he had hoped. His dad was busy most of the time with more administrative things that Tony didn’t want to get in the way of. Still, they tried to have lunch together most days and chat a little, which was nice.

There had been a couple of tense moments of near shouting, but Tony didn’t take it personally. Now that he was hanging out at SI all day, he could see how stressful it was, so when his dad was a little frazzled and short-tempered, Tony could understand that it was just the pressure of the job. So, rather than digging his feet in and snapping back, he’s taken a deep breath and let it go, giving his dad some space to get himself back in a better frame of mind. Later, Howard had apologized, which Tony had appreciated. It was certainly an improvement over their previous relationship.

“All right, Tony,” Howard said in the beginning of the fourth week of his internship. They were in his dad’s office, and for once there were no meetings that required his attention. “We need to talk about SHIELD.”

“Okay,” Tony said.

“Even though I’m not a part of it anymore, it’s still important for you to know about it.” He paused for a moment and sighed. “I never wanted you to get involved with any of it, but it’s too late now. Keeping you in the dark isn’t possible anymore, and it’s not safe for you anyway.” Tony nodded and waited as his dad seemed to search for the right words. “Looking back on it, I don’t think I’m really very happy about my involvement in it, to be honest, but at the time I believed we were doing a good thing. Still, the road to hell and all that. It’s hard to say how something will turn out sometimes, especially when… things change.” He sighed again. “The SHIELD I built isn’t the same that exists today, and I don’t like the direction it eventually took.”

He went on to explain the context for the founding of SHIELD, and how it had initially operated. Howard had never been part of the daily operations, so it had been easy to overlook the changes that had happened over time. His role was mostly tech-support and financial backer, though SHIELD also got some money from the government and some investments. He couldn’t really go into specifics about what they did – because it was classified and because he actually didn’t know a lot of details – but he gave a more detailed overview of what the organization was supposed to be about than he had done the first time they had talked about SHIELD, many months ago.

Tony had to said he wasn’t all that impressed, and couldn’t really see what they did that the CIA and FBI didn’t already cover. He was glad Howard had quit, though. It really didn’t sound like something Tony wanted to spend time on, and it had clearly not done his dad any good over the years either.

“What about Peggy?” Tony asked.

Howard shrugged. “I haven’t really talked to her – which is just as well.” He hesitated, then continued. “To be honest, we haven’t gotten along very well for a while, and I don’t think I trust her anymore.”

That was a surprise; Tony had thought Howard and Peggy were friends. However, given everything he had just learned, perhaps it wasn’t that surprising that they had parted ways – and it was probably a good thing too.

“Okay. And Obie?” During the first week of his internship, Obie had been around a lot and had talked to Tony quite a bit about the company. He’d made some remarks about Howard losing his touch which Tony hadn’t appreciated, though, so he had begun to avoid Obie as much as possible after that.

While he had been on the outs with his father, Obie had seemed like a fun uncle who had time for him and his questions; someone he could commiserate about Howard with. Now, though… Now the man made him a bit uncomfortable, and Tony couldn’t figure out why. Had Obie changed or had Tony? Something was different, but he didn’t know what it was.

Howard shook his head. “Obie is still pissed about the upcoming changes. I’m hoping he’ll come around eventually.”

“And if he doesn’t?”

“Then…” He sighed. “I guess I can always try to buy him out, if he really doesn’t want to be part of the company anymore.”

There was a bit of an awkward silence, before Tony asked. “Do you want to do that?”

“Honestly? I don’t know. Not too long ago, I would have said no. Now… I don’t want to keep fighting Obie, so if he doesn’t accept the way things are, he’ll have to go.”

While it might seem a bit heartless on the surface – hadn’t Howard and Obie been friends for years? – Tony realized Howard had to think like a businessman, and consider what was best for the company. After all, it wasn’t just about them; there were literally thousands of people who depended on SI for their livelihood. Plus, at the end of the day, SI was dad’s company, and he should be the one to decide what they did. Still, having to stick to one’s guns and letting people go was an aspect of leadership Tony really wasn’t looking forward to.

*****

In the second week of August, Tony took a short break from SI to go visit Rhodey in Philadelphia. Howard wanted Vince to go with him, but Tony put his foot down against it. He couldn’t show at Rhodey’s house with his bodyguard in tow. Besides, where was poor Vince supposed to stay? Rhodey promised to meet Tony at the airport, which mollified Howard a bit. His parents and Jarvis drove him to the airport, and Tony felt only a little embarrassed by his mom’s exuberant affection in sending him off.

Howard had told him that Maria was feeling a little left out now that father and son were finally getting along, so Tony had done his best to make time for his mom as well – and he let her fuss over him as much as she wanted. There had also been some valuable lessons in public relations from his mom, which complimented what he’d learned from the PR department at SI, so that was nice.

“Have a good time, honey. Don’t forget to call us when you get there.”

“Yes, mom, I promise.”

After a few more hugs (from Howard and Jarvis as well), Tony boarded the plane with a spring in his step.

The flight was perfectly normal, and Rhodey was waiting for him when he arrived.

“Tony!”

“Sugarplum!”

Fuck, he’d missed Rhodey.

They embraced each other and Tony did his best to keep his overexcited body under control. They had talked on the phone a lot over the last month, but it was not the same as being physically in the same room together.

“You look great, man,” Rhodey said, helping Tony with his suitcase.

“You too. Your mom been keeping you busy, huh?” He asked with a grin.

“Man, you have no idea. I’ve hardly had a moment to myself.” Rhodey laughed, a sound that Tony had sorely missed. “How about you? How’s the internship going?”

“Great. I’m learning a lot.”

They got to the car park, and from there to Rhodey’s house. It was a modest looking house, sitting in between several other houses that looked much the same. A couple of neighbors waved hello to Rhodey when they got out of the car, and Tony mused about how odd it was to have proper neighbors. Until he and Rhodey had moved into their apartment, Tony had never really had neighbors. There was a very nice elderly couple in the apartment below theirs, and Tony and Rhodey occasionally helped them by carrying groceries and fixing appliances. In exchange, they got some home cooked meals and baked goods. It was nice.

Tony waved along with Rhodey and followed his friend inside.

“Mom, we’re here!” Rhodey shouted.

Mrs Rhodes was a tall woman with hazel eyes and dark hair that was tied into a high bun on her head. She regarded Tony for a moment, then broke into a smile.

“My goodness, look at you. Aren’t you adorable?”

“Mom!” Rhodey hissed as Tony laughed.

At least he was making a good impression. “My mom thinks so too,” he said, and Mrs Rhodes laughed too.

“I’m sure she does.”

Tony stepped forward and extended a hand. “Tony Stark. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs Rhodes.”

“Roberta, please. And it’s lovely to meet you too, Tony. James has told me a lot about you.”

“Good things, I hope,” he replied. It occurred to him then that he was going to have to be very careful not keep his crush to himself. If his own mom could tell right away, it was possible that Mrs Rhodes – Roberta – would too.

He really should have thought of that before, actually, but he’d been so excited by the prospect of seeing Rhodey after months of separation that nothing else had registered.

Oh well, he’d just have to make the best of it.

Chapter Text

There was something going on with Obie, and Howard didn’t like it. The man had been cagey since Howard had announced the changes to the company’s direction. At first, Howard had thought it was just because Obie didn’t want to take the risks that inevitably came with any change, and he’d settle down after a while. However, that hadn’t happened. On the contrary, Obie was getting more and more restless. It made Howard very suspicious.

And, if he really thought about it, things had been a bit tense since Tony’s run-in with the assassin.

At this point it seemed pretty clear that Obie’s days with the company were numbered, and Howard had mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, Obie had been his partner for a long time, and they mostly got along well, since their strengths complimented each other. On the other hand, Howard had been reconsidering a lot of his personal interactions lately, as his general disposition and outlook on life had improved, and he wasn’t sure he liked some of the things he had noticed about Obie. He had talked to Maria about it, and she agreed that Obie could be a bit… manipulative on occasion. Even Tony had confessed to some unease around Obie lately.

So, Obie would have to go. The question now was how to go about it in a way that would cause the least amount of problems both for the company and for Howard on a personal level.

He was going to take advantage of the fact that Tony was off visiting Rhodey to approach Obie, as he didn’t want the other man to try to drag Tony in the middle of it. Before that, however, he got Brenda and some of the department heads together to sound out the terrain and come up with a game plan to present to the Board. He had been a little worried that the Board would balk at letting Obie go, but Howard had managed to persuade them that this was the right move to make the transition into less focus on weapons and more on other types of technology easier. There were a lot of new things they could invest in that had the potential to expand the company into a whole new market and, therefore, generate a lot more profit – which was all the Board ultimately cared about. Howard really hoped Obie wouldn’t make things too difficult.

Unfortunately, he did.

When Howard finally sat down with Obie to talk about the future of the company and Obie’s departure, the response was less than thrilled. In fact, Obie was pretty damn pissed off.

“You’re kicking me out?” Obie asked with a snarl. “After everything I did for you?”

Howard held on to his temper with some difficulty. It was at times like this that he really missed having a drink to release some of the tension.

“Look, Obie, it’s clear you aren’t happy about our new direction–”

“Because you’re being an idiot, letting those fucking liberals get to you.”

“This has nothing to do with liberals. It has nothing to do with politics at all. It’s what I want to do because it’s what I believe in.”

Obie scoffed. “SI is a weapons company, Howard.”

“That doesn’t mean we can’t change,” he replied, tired of this argument. They had already had this conversation several times. “I appreciate all you did, but it’s time for us to go our separate ways.” He got the proposal he had put together for the buyout and gave it to Obie. “Look it over and let me know what you think. There might be room for negotiations.” Not that he was that keen on giving Obie more than he had already offered, but if it got things done with little drama, Howard was willing to consider it.

The glare Obie sent his way made it clear he was not going to accept this too easily. He stood, towering over Howard for a moment, eyes blazing in fury.

“You’re going to regret this, Howard.”

“Come on, Obie. It’s just business, it’s not personal. We had a good run together, but it’s over. Don’t make this harder than it has to be.”

Obie’s response was to growl. He picked up the folder on the table and left in a huff.

Howard sighed and slumped into his chair.

Yeah, this was definitely not going to be easy. Not that he had expected it to be, of course, but he had a feeling the trouble was only just beginning.

*****

Obie called the Board to discuss the situation a couple of days later. Howard had expected it, and he was prepared to counter all of Obie’s arguments, show all the projected expansion and its profitability, and stand his ground. Fortunately, most of the Board remained on his side, and Obie didn’t get the leverage he was hoping for. Once again he stormed out spitting threats and vitriol.

Howard made sure Obie was locked out of all major areas and systems in the company, since he didn’t trust the man not to make a mess of things before he left. He also got security to keep an eye on him and anyone from inside he might approach.

By the time Tony came back from Philadelphia, Howard had gotten the legal department involved to try to force Obie to sign his severance package. Of course, Obie had his own lawyer file some kind of suit, and Howard’s hope of not getting the courts involved seemed more unlikely every day. The Legal department was going to have a lot of work to do in the coming weeks.

In the midst of all that, Howard got a call from Flincher about some new developments in the investigation into the so-called Winter Soldier, and had to travel to DC.

It was probably just as well, because he could use the break from the Obie drama. He was pretty stressed out about it, and had gotten rather snippy with Maria and Tony as a result. The fact that he was itching for a drink didn’t improve his mood any.

Just when things had finally been looking up for him, fucking Obie had to be a pain in the ass.

The only saving grace so far was that the papers hadn’t gotten wind of the troubles at SI, so he didn’t have reporters breathing down his neck about it, though of course their stocks were a little affected. Nothing that couldn’t be sorted once it was all said and done, but it was annoying anyway.

He took a couple of deep breaths before knocking on Flincher’s door, doing his best to put all thoughts of Obie out of his mind. He still had the damn assassin to worry about.

Flincher greeted him with a handshake and led the way into his study. There was a tray with coffee and pie, and Howard was glad he’d had the foresight to tell Flincher he wasn’t drinking anymore; he wasn’t sure he would have been able to say no if he’d been offered something.

“All right, I’ll get right to the point,” Flincher said. “Those worrying events I told you about? There is definitely something there, some kind of connection.”

Howard nodded, sipping his coffee. “I spoke to some of my military contacts and they had some suspicions too.” There was nothing concrete that anyone could pinpoint, but there was something that didn’t seem quite right. “But where does the Winter Soldier fit in?”

“That I don’t know. I don’t even know for sure if the two things are linked, but I think we should consider that they are.”

“What do you know?” Howard asked.

Flincher detailed his investigation, and the tentative conclusions he had drawn – which pointed to some kind of organization working behind the scenes to benefit some big companies and politicians. “The problem is, nobody really knows anything. There’s no evidence, nothing that points to anyone in particular,” Flincher said, leaning back in his chair. He took a cigarette out of his pocket and offered it to Howard, who declined. He’d quit smoking years ago, when Tony had been a baby, because Maria (and Jarvis) had insisted that it was bad for the child – and Maria wasn’t about to let anything threaten Tony’s health. “Worse,” he continued, “it’s too widespread.”

“Fingers in lots of pies,” Howard agreed. Rich people and politicians always had power and pull, of course, but what Flincher was talking about went beyond that. There were too many coincidences to be believable, and while they couldn’t say what this group’s ultimate goal was, the fact that they seemed to have a lot of reach was concerning.

He didn’t usually like to indulge in crackpot conspiracy theories – he had heard a lot of those over the years – but he couldn’t deny that there was something fishy here.

“What can we do, though?” he asked. Howard was a private citizen, and it wasn’t his job to monitor either the government or big corporations. The only reason he cared about this was because he and his family seemed to have become a target. The Winter Soldier had to have been after the serum, and even though it was no longer in Howard’s possession, there was no guarantee that he wouldn’t come back to dispose of a witness. And Howard would be damned if he let anything happen to his son.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said, about the possible identity of the Soldier,” Flincher said.

Howard sighed. He had been thinking about it too, and it really sounded like a crazy idea. A passing resemblance to a man long dead was not enough evidence of anything. Honestly, he didn’t know why he still believed it at all, but the idea would not leave his head not matter how crazy it seemed.

“It’s… It’s insane, I know.”

“It is, but…” Flincher shrugged. “I don’t know. I can’t help thinking you’re on to something.”

“But how does that help? How do we find a ghost?” How do I keep my family safe? he thought.

“I don’t know. The most important thing, I guess, is that we know about it. That we can keep an eye on things, and get other people we trust to do the same.”

“And who can we trust?” Howard asked. “As you said before, these people have to have some allies in high places to have been able to pull this off without anyone figuring it out so far.”

The look on Flincher’s face was one of frustration – which Howard could certainly understand.

“I wish I knew.”

“We need some evidence of… something. Someone we can pin down, a place to start,” Howard said. He thought of the Winter Soldier again and shivered. “Preferably someone who isn’t a deadly assassin,” he muttered.

Flincher nodded. “I’m doing what I can, but yeah, without something concrete, it’s going to be hard. I was hoping you might have some ideas.”

Howard wished he did, but nothing came to mind. There were still far too many unanswered questions – and too much chance of tipping their hand if they dug too deep without proper direction.

He went back home with nothing to show for it except more worry.

*****

While the legal worries with Obie continued, Howard tried to focus on more positive things. Despite everything, he managed to come up with a lot of good ideas for how to take the company forward. It would take time for those ideas to fully come to fruition, but he was hopeful.

Aside from that, Tony seemed to really be enjoying his internship, and the people Howard talked to had nothing but good things to say about the kid. He was described as smart (obviously), while also willing to listen and learn. And enthusiastic; Howard got told that a lot.

It was nice, really. Not too long ago, Tony would have been anxious and defensive, expecting either criticism or indifference, which would have probably made him more aggressive and unsure in dealing with things. Now that he and Howard were on better footing with each other, the kid was much more relaxed, and his sunny personality could shine through and charm everyone.

Howard didn’t get to spend as much time with Tony at SI as he would have liked, unfortunately – not with all that was happening, and even before that –, but he did try to check in with his son and have lunch together whenever he could. He was going to miss Tony when he went back to school in a few weeks.

Except for a few days in which Howard’s bad mood had gotten the best of him, dinners at home with Tony and Maria had been nice, and they had renewed their talk about a proper vacation as a family. Maria suggested spending Christmas and New Years’ in Europe this year, and then enjoying a couple more weeks after that travelling. Howard wasn’t sure he’d be able to stay away for that long, though, but the holidays should be feasible.

“I like that, mom,” Tony said. “We can go to Italy and Germany. Maybe France too.”

Maria agreed with a smile, then turned to Howard.

“Yeah, sure. Hopefully things will all be settled by then with the company and…” he trailed off, not really wanting to mention the assassin.

“All right, so I’ll start looking into it.”

The conversation turned to other matters, like Tony’s plans for after he was back in school, and whether there was anything he needed for the apartment or in general.

Tony tried to explain his robot project, which was nearly done, to them. Maria clearly didn’t get most of it, and Howard had to admit that he wasn’t that familiar with some of the stuff Tony had done. Regardless, they listened and offered their praise and encouragement. Howard was really looking forward to seeing if Tony would be able to accomplish what he wanted; if he did, it would be a remarkable achievement, and definitely something SI could explore in the future. 

Maria offered some good ideas for SI’s rebranding that made Howard remember how much he appreciated her mind. She may not be a genius, but she was certainly a very capable woman. The philanthropic side of the company was thriving in her hands, and it definitely helped their image overall with the general public.

“How are things going with you and Tony?” Howard asked that night when they were getting ready for bed. It was nice to have these pre-sleep conversations again, like a normal couple.

“Very good,” she answered with a smile. “It’s not… There’s only so much I can follow about his projects, but we have found other things to share.”

“Did he tell you anything about James?” All Tony had told Howard was that he had had a great time with his friend. While it seemed like the kid was dealing with his feelings well enough, Howard was the first to admit that he wasn’t sure if he would be able to spot a problem, and he thought Tony would be more likely to confide in Maria about these things.

“Only that he enjoyed himself.”

“Do you think he’s really okay?” Howard couldn’t say he was personally familiar with unrequited love, so he had no idea what his son was going through.

Maria took a moment to reply, as if going over everything Tony had said and done since he’d come home. “Yes, I think he is. I think he’s happy with their friendship.”

Howard nodded. “You think it will last? Once they’re out of college?” They knew that James intended to continue to pursue his military career and become a pilot, so it would be beneficial to him to maintain a connection to the heir for Stark Industries. However, that did not mean, necessarily, that the boys would remain close. It also made Howard a little bit worried that that was all James would be interested in going forward. He didn’t seem like the type, but one never really knew – which was something Howard had learned from bitter experience.

“Yes, I think so. I mean, it won’t be the same, of course. James will probably be far away for a while, but I’m sure they’ll still find time to spend together.”

That was reassuring, Howard thought. With the way things had been going with Obie lately, he had been worried about Tony’s friendship crashing and burning too. Maria having so much faith in James eased Howard’s fears a little bit, since she had proven to be a decent judge of character (usually much better than him, in fact).

“Good.” He could only hope that she was right.

*****

A somewhat unexpected result of the situation with Obie was that it demonstrated the need for more organization in Stark Industries. The internal audit he had began a few months ago had shown some concerns in the financial department. There was, Howard was informed, a good chance that someone (possibly Obie) had been fudging the accounts to hide some embezzlements. That really pissed Howard off, and he called the department heads for a meeting. They all claimed they knew nothing about it, and Howard wasn’t sure he could believe them – at least, not all of them. However, an internal investigation wasn’t enough to figure out exactly what was going on and who was involved, so Howard would have no choice but to involve the authorities, which would be yet another blow to the company’s image and stocks if they couldn’t keep it out of the press.

The best Howard could do was reach out to his contacts in the FBI and hope that they would be discreet in their digging.

Another rather annoying side effect was SHIELD’s renewed interested in Howard.

At least this time Peggy called to set an appointment rather than just barge into his office just because she felt like it.

In truth, Howard was very tempted to tell her to fuck off. He didn’t want to have anything to do with SHIELD anymore, and had successfully pulled all his funding away from them and back into the company – a good thing, considering the problems with Obie. Plus, he was actually really busy and didn’t feel like dealing with Peggy’s condescending attitude. Unfortunately, Peggy had never been able to just take no for an answer. Sometimes that could be admirable – he was well aware of how hard it had been for her to establish herself in a male-dominated field – while other times it was just downright exasperating.

He finally agreed to speak to her in a neutral location; an expensive restaurant in Manhattan that had tables reserved for private business meetings. Howard had used the place before, and he knew the staff was reliable and discrete. He had briefly considered bringing Tony along so he could learn to deal with this kind of thing, but decided against it. It was better to keep SHIELD’s attention as far away from Tony as possible.

“What do you want, Peggy?” Howard asked when she arrived, expression the usual slightly disdainful one she used with him, as if she was the one doing him the favor instead of the other way around.

“I hear you’re changing things up in Stark Industries.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Yes, and? How is that any of your business?”

She ignored his clear indication of annoyance. “You’re really not going to make weapons anymore? We need weapons, Howard.”

“Who’s ‘we’?” he countered. “Last I checked, SHIELD isn’t part of the US military.” While some SI weapons had been given (or sold) to SHIELD throughout the years, that had stopped at least 5 years ago. That decision had been partly his and partly a result of an agreement with the government to restrict SI weapons. Of course, Howard was under no illusion that Peggy hadn’t managed to sweet talk some high-ups into supplying SHIELD, but she had not acquired them from SI directly (he hoped not, at least). Other tech, yes – surveillance and communication equipment, mostly – but not weapons.

“Look, Howard, I know that things have been… strained between us –”

“Whose fault is that?” he muttered.

“– but you’re making a mistake. There are threats out there that we need to be ready for.”

“What threats?” Did she know about the Winter Soldier, or whoever he was working for? He had considered talking to her about it, of course – if anyone would know about shady stuff being done in the shadows, it would be her. However, he couldn’t be sure that she wasn’t somehow involved – or, at least, a bit complicit. Peggy had always been willing to do whatever it took to get things done, regardless of the law, rules or the risks involved. Again, while that could be a quality, it also made her dangerously reckless on occasion – and the person paying the price when the shit hit the fan was rarely herself.

“I can’t tell you,” was the (not surprising) response.

Howard sighed. God, he was so tired of all this bullshit. He just wanted to invent stuff and spend time with his family; he didn’t want to deal with conspiracy theories and threats. That wasn’t his fucking job.

“Then what the hell do you want?”

“I want you to reconsider the path you’re in. I want you to work with me, to help me make the world safer.”

He couldn’t help it; he scoffed. “Give me a fucking break, Peggy. Make the world safer? What the hell is that supposed to mean?” She opened her mouth, but he continued on before she could speak. “I don’t want to play puppeteer. I don’t want to have the fate of the world in my hands.” Hell, he had enough to contend with just with his family and company. “And I sure as hell don’t want to go back to SHIELD. I told you, I’m done with all that.”

Peggy pursed her lips in displeasure, but Howard honestly couldn’t give a fuck.

“There are bigger things than us here.”

“Then stop being so damned cryptic and tell me. You want my help? Tell me the fucking truth. Otherwise, we’re done here.”

She wasn’t going to tell him anything, he knew. As much as it pained him to admit it, the truth was that Peggy didn’t actually trust him – and the feeling was mutual. She wanted his tech, his money, his brain, but not Howard himself; and it had taken him an embarrassingly long time to understand that.

The more he thought about it, the more the feeling that she knew something about this shadowy organization intensified. He didn’t think it was SHIELD – they didn’t have that much reach – but she had to have dealt with some of it already.

“Do you know anything about the man who tried to kill Tony?” he asked when her silence had stretched out too long.

“Of course not,” she replied. The thing was, Howard wasn’t sure he believed her.

“So help me god, Peggy, if I find you had anything to do with this…” he growled.

“You think I would murder a child, Howard?” Her eyes flashed with anger.

“I don’t know. I don’t know who you are anymore, Peggy. Hell, I’m not sure you know who you are anymore. All this talk about vague threats, about weapons, about protection… Can’t you see how suspicious it is? It sounds like you’re chasing shadows. Worse, like you’ve lost sight of the goal.”

“I haven’t–”

“All I hear from you is fear mongering. A need for control. Tell me, why should I believe that you actually give a crap about the world when you can’t even pretend to care about me and my family?” He looked her dead in the eye and was satisfied to see her flinch just a little bit. “You’ve become ruthless, Peggy. The ‘ends justify the means’ type, and that… that never ends well. You should know better.” He paused, keeping eye contact. “So I’m going to ask you again: do you know anything about the assassin?”

This time she took her time answering, looking suddenly much older. “I don’t. I swear. I would never want anything to happen to Tony. Or to you,” she added, almost a whisper.

“Do you know anything at all that could help me, Peggy? I just want to keep my family safe.” His voice was gentler now, trying to appeal to the idealistic woman he had met all those years ago who believed in truth and justice.

She sighed and shook his head. “Nothing concrete. It’s infuriating.”

“Will you let me know if you find anything?”

“Yes.”

He nodded and stood. “I know it’s easy to get stuck in a bad situation, Peggy. It’s hard to see how bad things are, and hard to figure out how to get out of it. But please, think about what I said. Think about what you’re doing. There has to be a better way.”

He counted as a win that she seemed at have actually listened to him this time.

Chapter Text

It was bittersweet to say goodbye to Dr Litchfield and the rest of the R&D team. Tony had had a great time working with them during his internship, and he’d learned a lot about the entire process of building something. He’d also gotten some very useful suggestions on how to develop some of his ideas for the future. There were still a couple of years before he could finish his degree (though he was thinking of speeding things up), and then he would be back to SI full time.

And, really, he couldn’t wait.

While before the idea of working with his father had been a source of anxiety and fear, now he could embrace it wholeheartedly.

Despite all the drama with Obie over the last couple of weeks, it seemed that things were back on track. Obie had finally agreed to the severance package and would be leaving officially in a few short weeks – and as far as Howard was concerned, that day could not come soon enough.

Tony used to like Obie, but the past few weeks had shown a whole new side of him that no one was very impressed with. Still, Howard had told Tony that they should think of it as a lesson to learn. In truth, though, Tony wasn’t quite sure what the lesson was supposed to be. Don’t trust anyone? That would be a terrible way to live.

He was a little annoyed that the situation with Obie had interfered very negatively with his internship, though. It had begun really well, then his father had become very preoccupied with that mess – stressed and short-tempered in a way that reminded Tony uncomfortably of the way he used to be. At least this time Tony had a better understanding of what was going on, and Howard really did try not to let his bad mood spill into his family life too much. There were still fights – with his mom too – but not as bad as before. (It also helped that Howard had quit drinking.)

All in all, though, Tony was counting it as a big win for him and his dad – and for his whole family. They had (mostly) managed to keep their heads and give each other space when they needed it. And, more importantly, enjoy each other’s company a lot of the time. Tony had spent time with his father, working together, talking about the future of the company and some personal things as well. He had also spent some time with his mom, which had been nice. She had taught him a lot about the importance of public perception and how to manage that positively. Even Jarvis had driven him and his dad to SI sometimes so they could chat a little on the way.

It had been pretty awesome, Obie’s situation notwithstanding.

Sadly, in a few days, Tony would be going back to college. He was really going to miss his family.

On the plus side, he’d get to see Rhodey every day again, which would be nice. Visiting his friend in Philly for a few days had been great, but it wasn’t the same as hanging out together in their apartment.

Tony checked his watch and realized he had to stop woolgathering and move his ass. There was a lot to pack – he’d accumulated a lot of stuff in the summer that he would need to take to Boston with him; unfinished projects, tools and some other miscellaneous things – and he hadn’t even started.

He stopped by his dad’s office and found him pouring over a pile of reports.

“Dad?”

“What?” Howard didn’t look up from the papers he was reading. He was looking a bit haggard these days – damn Obie – and Tony didn’t like it.

“Let’s go home.”

“I still have work to do.”

Tony huffed. “Dad. You can do this later. Come on, you look like shit.”

That made his dad look up. “Thanks, Tony,” he said sarcastically.

“Daaaaad,” Tony insisted.

“For fuck’s sake, leave me be,” Howard snapped. Then he sighed. “Look, I need a couple of hours more, all right? You go on ahead. I’ll be home for dinner.”

Tony clenched his jaw, and decided to let it go. “Fine. I’ll send Jarvis to come get you if you take too long. Maybe mom too.”

“Low blow, Tony,” His father replied, though there was a smile tugging at the corner of his lips now.

“See you in a couple of hours, then.”

“Yeah.”

Howard went back to his reports, not paying Tony any more attention. It hurt a little, but he took a deep breath and reminded himself it was not personal. There was a lot to do with Obie leaving the company – and a few other issues dad had been somewhat vague about – and things would get better again once that was all wrapped up. Perhaps the best thing he could do now was try to be supportive and not pester his dad too much.

He made sure Brenda knew to call if Howard was still there when it was time for her to leave, then headed for the garage. Over the summer, he and Howard had driven together sometimes, but other times Tony had elected to drive himself (with Vince in the passenger seat); after all, he had a fantastic new car that was just begging to be used. In the last few days, Tony had used his own car more often than not, with his father’s encouragement, since Howard had worked late a lot.

Today Tony was by himself because Vince hadn’t been feeling well and had gone to the doctor to get himself checked out. There was no one else around, and Tony started thinking about how he was going to organize all his stuff for the trip back to college.

It wasn’t until he was inside his car with the door closed that he sensed something was wrong.

For a moment, all he had was an uneasy feeling, then he looked into the rearview mirror to find the masked assassin staring at him with those dead eyes.

He made as if to get out, but the assassin pulled a gun and Tony froze in fear.

Oh shit. Oh shit.

With the hand not holding the gun, the masked man tossed a piece of paper at Tony, the rest of his body unmoving.

Tony grabbed the paper and read the short note. It was an address in New York, in what Tony thought was Brooklyn – the more shady part of it (the one he had never actually been in) and a single word: drive.

With trembling hands, Tony started the car. He tried to stall, hoping that someone might show up, but the assassin merely shoved the gun a little closer to Tony’s face, and he figured it would be better to comply for the moment. From everything his father had uncovered about this man, he was not the kind you messed around with. Tony might have a better chance of escaping once they got to their destination. If the man had decided to kidnap him now, it was likely that whoever had sent him wanted Tony alive after all, and that would give him something to work with. He would simply have to wait for an opportunity.

Doing his best to keep his breathing under control, Tony maneuvered the car out of the SI’s parking lot. There was a security guard at the entrance, and the assassin leaned down on the backseat so he wouldn’t be seen. For a split second, Tony considered crying for help, but he couldn’t risk the guard’s life. The assassin might want Tony, but there was no guarantees he wouldn’t shoot any potential witnesses, and Tony didn’t want someone’s death on his conscience.

He was glad Vince wasn’t with him today – although that was very suspicious now. How did the man know that Tony’s bodyguard wasn’t here? Or had he somehow deliberately done something to Vince to keep him out of the way?

Fuck.

Once out of the building, the assassin returned to his previous position, gun held steadily between the front seats at a low angle so it wouldn’t be seen from outside. The man’s silence was very unnerving, and Tony had to bite his lip not to start talking just to hear some noise.

What the fuck am I going to do now?

This wasn’t an amateur, like his last kidnappers. Those guys had been stupid and sloppy, thinking Tony was an easy target because he was a kid. This guy was a pro, and not likely to be swayed by anything Tony might have to say.

Still, after a few minutes of tense-filled driving, Tony opened his mouth – hoping he wasn’t making a huge mistake.

“Bucky Barnes?” he asked, glancing in the rearview mirror for any reaction. He was still not entirely convinced of his father’s theory, but it was the only thing he had at the moment.

The man didn’t move a muscle.

“You look a lot like someone my father used to know in the war. A man named James Buchanan Barnes. Everyone called him Bucky, though,” he continued. Again, there was no reaction. “He was part of a group called the Howling Commandos, and fought alongside Steve Rogers – Captain America, you know – against the Nazis. He had a mother named Julia, a father named John and a little sister called Becky.” Tony had made it a point to learn everything he could about Barnes, and it seemed to be paying off now. The names of his relatives had elicited a slight frown. “Bucky was drafted to fight, and was part of the 107^th Infantry Regiment before the Commandos. He was a real hero, and an all around nice guy, my dad said.” Since the man hadn’t told him to shut up yet, Tony went on. “Bucky used to look after Steve Rogers before he got all beefed up as Captain America, which was nice of him, because Steve was kind of a sickly fellow, and needed someone to take care of him.”

There was a twitch in the man’s expression, and Tony thought the gun waivered the tiniest bit. He kept talking, telling the man every single story his father had ever told him about the Commandos and every scrap of information he had ever learned about Bucky Barnes. Thanks to his very good memory, it all amounted to quite a lot. When he spoke about Rogers’s heroic rescue of the 107^th Infantry Regiment (and Bucky himself, of course) the assassin’s expressionless mask cracked for the first time.

“Hydra was experimenting with the serum too,” Tony said as he continued to drive, not really paying much attention to where he was going at all, “and dad said Bucky was likely injected with something. They weren’t able to figure out what it was, exactly, but he seemed mostly fine. If it was a version of the super soldier serum, it could have had some of the same healing properties. Not as much as the one Cap got, but something.”

The assassin – it really was Bucky, wasn’t it? It had to be. Fucking hell – blinked. For a moment, he seemed like he wasn’t sure where he was. Then the stoic mask was back.

Tony pressed on. “Bucky was presumably killed in action in ’45. The Commandos were raiding a train and he fell out of it during the fight with the enemy soldiers. His body was never recovered, but he was deeply missed by everyone who knew him, including my father. Do you remember him? Howard Stark? He built weapons for the allied forces, build Cap’s shield. You remember that, don’t you, Bucky? Steve Rogers? The Commandos? They all spoke very highly of you.”

Bucky’s eyes lost some of the deadness and he blinked several times. Even his posture slumped a bit, no longer ramrod straight on the car seat.

“My father can help you,” Tony said. “Whatever they did to you, we can undo it. You can… you can come home. You can get your life back.” Well, it wasn’t going to be the same life, of course, but Tony wasn’t worried about technicalities at the moment. All he cared about was getting that damn gun out of his face and going home to his family.

The gun in question shook slightly.

Tony started talking again, going on about his dad’s contacts in the military and how they would love to bring a war hero home. Some of the Commandos were still alive (only a couple, but Tony didn’t dwell on details), and they would probably be able to help too. There were photographs from that time that Bucky could see, it might bring back more memories. It might help him remember who he was, get his life back.

“We’ll do everything we can,” Tony promised. “And we’re rich, so we can do a lot. Whoever it is that’s… telling you what to do now… You can get away from them. We’ll get those sons of bitches and make them pay for everything they did to you.”

Bucky closed his eyes and his arm lowered for the first time since Tony had entered the car.

Come on, Bucky, he chanted inside his head. Come on, just listen to me.

They stopped at a red light, and Tony realized he wasn’t sure where he was. Still in Manhattan somewhere, but he didn’t recognize any of the buildings around. He checked the mirror again, and found that the gun was pointed at him once more. Whatever moment of weakness Bucky had had, it seemed to be over now.

Damn it.

“Drive.”

It was the first time the man had spoken, and his voice sounded gravelly and rough, as if he wasn’t used to speaking much.

“Please,” Tony tried again. “You don’t have to do this. We can turn around and go back. My father will help you, I swear.” Maybe it wasn’t the best idea to take the man back to SI Headquarters, but it was all he could think of right now. Perhaps seeing a familiar face would help. Howard no doubt knew a lot more about Bucky than Tony did, and he could call the rest of the Commandos. Hell, even Peggy. Despite the fact that his dad wasn’t really talking to Peggy these days, he would make an exception in this case, Tony was sure.

Bucky shook his head and gestured to the piece of paper with the address they were supposed to go to. “Drive.”

“I… I don’t know where that is,” Tony said.

The gun got closer to his face. “No more delays. Drive.”

Swallowing hard, Tony tried to figure out where he was and how to get to where he’d been told to.

“Look, this really isn’t–”

“No more talking. Drive.” The assassin’s hand was steady again, so Tony thought it would be better not to push it too much. “Left here,” he commanded, and Tony obeyed.

With a little direction from his kidnapper, Tony managed to arrive at the address. It was an old warehouse in what he thought was Brownsville. His fancy car stood out like a sore thumb and would likely be stolen within minutes, which pissed Tony off. This car had been a gift from his father, damn it, and he liked it. He’d had it for barely three months, and hardly got to use it. Whoever was behind this kidnapping was going to pay if anything happened to his car.

Thinking of the car was better than thinking about what was going to happen to him. Bucky exited the car and kept the gun pointed at Tony. There was no indication that Tony had reached him at all now.

Fuck. He was so fucked.

“Bucky, please,” he tried again, and was ignored. A shove got Tony moving forward, and he took care to get a good look at his surroundings in case he managed to escape. Barnes had taken his car keys, so Tony would probably have to run on foot, which was far from ideal in a place he was unfamiliar with.

Tony was led into a dingy building and up a flight of stairs into what seemed like a dirty office. There were a few people around, he noticed, who all stared at him as he passed.

Great, there’s a whole gang of goons here, he thought, a sinking feeling in his stomach. Of course he already knew that getting away wasn’t going to be easy, but this was worse than he’d expected. The one saving grace was that they probably wanted a ransom, which meant keeping him alive for now. Once his father forked over the money, though (and now Tony believed that his father would pay anything to get him back), he’d be screwed.

There was a nondescript man sitting the chair behind the old desk. He looked Tony up and down in disdain.

“So, Tony Stark, huh?” the man said. “Doesn’t seem like much, does he?” he asked no one in particular.

Tony bit down the retort he wanted to make; now was not the time. He needed more information about what was going on here – who these people were and what exactly they wanted, and he didn’t think antagonizing them just yet was going to help.

“What do you want?” he asked instead, tone mild and a little frightened. Though he was scared, he wanted these people to underestimate him, to think he was too cowered to be any threat to them at all. Also, he was well aware of Bucky leaning against the doorframe behind him, gun still in his hand and no doubt ready to shoot if he was given the order.

“We want many things, Mr Stark,” the man said. “We wanted something in your father’s possession, but…” he trailed off with a quick glare at Bucky. “Well, what’s done is done.”

So they had been after the serum, Tony thought, wondering how he could use this to his advantage. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. My dad doesn’t tell me stuff.”

A few months ago – before the attack, in fact – that would have been true. Now, however, thanks to these people, his father had told him quite a lot about what he had done for SHIELD and a bunch of other things.

“That’s all right,” the man replied condescendingly. “We don’t want information.”

“What do you want, then? Money?” If Howard had to make some kind of payment, he would be able to hide a tracker in it.

The man laughed. “No. Money is so… cliché, isn’t it? There are other things that are more important.”

That made Tony tense. What the hell was that supposed to mean? All criminals wanted money, didn’t they? What else was there? Power? Tony, despite his money and smarts, didn’t actually have any power. One day, perhaps, but right now he was just a college kid. Unless they were planning to extort his father using him as leverage – which was not a pleasant thought at all.

“What are you talking about? What do you want?”

The man stood. “Don’t worry about it, Mr Stark. You’ll find out in due course. Now, I have some preparations to make before we can make our move.” He turned to Bucky. “Restrain him and keep an eye on him.” With a last deranged grin at Tony, the man departed, leaving Tony alone with Bucky again.

As Bucky came closer, Tony backed away, going behind the desk the other man had just vacated to have a barrier, as flimsy as it might be, between them.

“Bucky, come on. Please. You don’t want to do this,” Tony pleaded, desperate words tumbling from his lips in a rush. If the man was planning to move them, probably far from New York, it would be a lot harder for his father to find him. Tony had to get out of here as soon as possible. “This is not who you are. You’re an American soldier. A good guy. A war hero. I can help you get away from these people. We can take them down, and you’ll be free. Don’t you want that? Don’t you want your life back? Your friends? Maybe… Maybe even your family. Your sister, Becky. Remember her? She might still be alive.”

Barnes paused, his eyes softening the slightest bit.

“Please, just… Help me. Help me and I swear I’ll help you. We can both get away from here. We can both go home.”

The man looked confused and… lost. Tony wondered what the hell had been done to him. He and Howard had discussed it one afternoon, and hadn’t been able to come up with anything. He could only hope that whatever it was could be reversed.

Barnes reached up and removed his mask for the first time. He looked pretty much exactly as he had in the photos Howard had of the Commandos, except for the cold and forbidding expression and the lanky longer hair.

“Sit,” Barnes said after a moment of silence.

Tony swallowed but didn’t move. “Bucky…”

“Sit. He might come back.”

Somewhat reluctantly, Tony complied, and sat in the only chair in the room. Barnes took out some thin rope from a pocket in his pants, holstered his gun and approached Tony.

“Don’t…”

Tony thought about trying to grab the gun away from Barnes, but it was too risky. The man was a trained soldier and assassin, and Tony didn’t know shit about fighting (a situation he was going to rectify as soon as possible; being able to protect himself was going to be a very high priority from now on).

He tensed as Barnes secured his arms and legs to the chair. Once it was done, however, he realized there was quite a lot of give in the restraints. With a bit of work, Tony would be able to get free, he thought.

He gave Barnes an encouraging smile before the man stepped back and returned to his post by the door. The office only had one small window looking down into the floor below, but the angle wouldn’t allow anyone down there to see Tony – and Tony couldn’t see anyone either.

Not too bad, he thought. He had some privacy to do… something.

A phone would have been very useful, but of course there wasn’t one. Boss criminal – whoever the fuck he was – wasn’t that stupid. Aside from the desk and chair, there was a filing cabinet in the corner and some office stuff like staplers and pens on the desk. The only electronic thing that Tony could see was an old radio, which probably had no working battery.

Despite being tied to the chair, Tony was able to open the single drawer in the desk, but found nothing but old-looking papers and a couple of pencils with broken tips.

Okay, Tony, think, he told himself. He had to get out of here before Boss Guy came back to take Tony… wherever. Bucky might help him, or he might not; he couldn’t count on the man too much, considering how fucked up he seemed to be. There were at least five goons downstairs that Tony would have to get past if he managed to leave the office, and then he’d have to find a car to get back to Manhattan – his own, even if he could get his keys back, was far too conspicuous for the neighborhood, and Tony wasn’t sure he wanted to attract any kind of attention.

Was his family even aware that he was missing yet? Tony had told his dad that he was going home, but Howard wouldn’t realize Tony had never made it there until he himself got home – which wouldn’t be for another hour at least. His mom probably wouldn’t think anything of Tony not being home yet, assuming he’d return with Howard.

When they did realize he was gone, they would call the police and the FBI. Again. And then… what? They would have no leads except dad’s crazy theory about Bucky, which no one knew was right except Tony. So how would they find him?

After Tony and his dad had started getting their shit together, they had talked about safety plans. His father had wanted to make him a tracker of some kind, something he could carry with him at all times. They had brainstormed some ideas together, but hadn’t really come up with anything workable. Clearly that had to be bumped higher on the priority list.

Still, maybe he could improvise something. He and Howard had talked about transmission frequencies and how to broaden a signal, so maybe his father would be on the lookout for a sign from Tony. It was worth a shot, he thought, if he could manage it. If Barnes didn’t decide to shoot him while he was rigging it.

He looked at the other man, and noticed that the dead eyes were back. Not good.

“My dad still talks to the Commandos, you know,” he said as he worked his hands free, hoping to keep Barnes’s mind on remembering who he was. “They come to the house sometimes. They used to tell me stories when I was a kid.” Tony had loved those stories. It had all sounded like grand adventures and fun times to his seven year-old imagination. Now he knew it had probably been pretty awful; war was not a joyride, after all. “They told me about how Steve was hopeless at picking up women, even when he looked… you know, like Captain America.” Tony had seen the before and after pictures of Steve Rogers, and boy, did that serum do wonders for him. He wasn’t exactly Tony’s type – muscles weren’t his thing – but he could appreciate a hot guy with the best of them.

Bucky’s eyes softened at that, and for a second Tony thought he saw the ghost of a smile on his lips.

“I mean, I know he had a thing for Peggy, but still… The way they talked, it was like he had no idea how to even talk to a lady without stammering.” Maybe the guys had been exaggerating – Steve was long dead, it wasn’t like he could defend himself – but Tony didn’t think so; Howard’s account had been much the same. “Dad had a bunch of admirers back then,” Tony went on, “but Dum Dum said you were pretty good with the ladies too. All those ‘good boy’ vibes and all.” Those vibes were long gone now, of course. Now he looked like he could (and probably did) murder people and not even blink. Shit, don’t go there, Tony. “I never knew if they were pulling my leg.”

With his hands free, Tony freed his feet, then rolled over to the shelf where the old radio was, picked it up and rolled back to the desk to start to pull it apart. His emergency toolkit was still in his pocket, because Boss Guy hadn’t even bothered to search him – big mistake, but he’d probably thought the scary assassin was enough to ensure Tony’s compliance. He was going to regret that.

He kept talking, retelling all the old stories he could remember, even the ones he had already mentioned in the car ride earlier. Perhaps hearing them again would help jog Bucky’s memories even more. In the meantime, he cannibalized the radio and his watch to build a rudimentary transmitter. Its signal was probably shit, but it was better than nothing. Plus, it was something to do. Working was always Tony’s go to activity to avoid thinking of unpleasant things – like his possible fate at the hands of his kidnappers.

He could only hope that Barnes wouldn’t go back to being the cold assassin he’d been coerced into becoming, and actually help him.

Otherwise, he was fucked.

Chapter Text

Howard looked up from his paperwork and stretched. God, he was tired. This business with Obie and the possible embezzlement had really thrown a wrench into his plans. That fucking bastard.

He checked the time and found that it had been almost two hours since Tony had gone home, which meant it was time for Howard to leave as well. After all the work he’d put into fixing his relationship with both Tony and Maria, he didn’t want to fuck it up again by falling back into old bad habits, like working late and thus missing dinner. Tony would only be home for another few days before going back to college, so he needed make every moment count.

After locking up everything, he grabbed his stuff and exited his office.

Brenda seemed to be finishing up for the day as well, and gave him a smile. “I was just about to call you, Sir.”

Howard grinned. “No need. I’m being a good boy today,” he said, which made her smile. “Have a good evening, Brenda.”

“You too, Sir.”

They walked to the parking garage together, then went their separate ways to get into their cars. Howard waved goodbye to the security guard and made his way home. Traffic wasn’t too bad today, thankfully, and he arrived home at what he thought was a reasonable hour – just before dinner.

“Good evening, Sir,” Jarvis greeted him, taking his coat and briefcase. “Where’s Master Tony?”

Howard frowned. “What do you mean? He left the office two hours ago. Is he not home yet?”

“No, he isn’t here.”

Fear made his heart beat faster, and Howard made a beeline for the phone. “Get Maria,” he snapped.

Jarvis hastened to comply.

Howard dialed Agent Marconi, who was in charge of the case of the mysterious assassin.

Perhaps he was getting a little ahead of himself – Tony could have just stopped somewhere and lost track of time –, but Howard couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. The Winter Soldier – whoever he was – was still out there, and god only knew what the people who had sent him were really after.

“Marconi,” the FBI agent said.

“Agent Marconi, it’s Howard Stark. My son is… might be missing.”

“What happened?”

“He left the office two hours ago, said he was coming home. I got home just now and he’s not here. I don’t like it. I have a feeling… I think something is wrong.”

If he were someone else, the agent might not have given much credit to his ‘feelings’, but Howard wasn’t the type to panic – and it wasn’t paranoia if there really was a masked assassin who had nearly murdered his son before. So, rather than dismiss him, Marconi asked all the right questions, and assured him that there would be a team at his house within minutes.

When he hung up, Maria was at his side, clutching Howard’s arm in worry.

“The FBI is on its way,” he told her. “I have to call the office, check on the security tapes.” Howard hadn’t seen Tony’s car when he’d left, but that didn’t necessarily mean anything.

By the time the FBI showed up, Howard was pacing the halls and desperately wishing for a drink.

They’d got complacent. Fuck it. He knew that Winter Soldier fucker was out there, but there had been no trace of him and no report of anything suspicious for months, so they had started to relax. Howard had thought Tony would be safe at SI. There was security there 24/7, and no unauthorized person could get in. Of course, that didn’t mean someone couldn’t be waiting for Tony to leave, and grab him outside – that was why Vince was there most of the time. He shouldn’t have let Tony drive alone today. He should have gone with Tony, or had him wait so they could leave together. Fuck.

“We’ve sent a team to your office, Mr Stark, and we’ll set up monitoring here, in case someone calls,” Marconi said. “We also have an APB out on his car. Hopefully we’ll get lucky.”

Howard nodded. “I asked SI security to look at our tapes. I’m going to head over there now to see if they’ve found anything.” He wasn’t going to just sit here and do nothing, or rely on luck (again). “We need to talk to Tony’s body guard. He called in sick today.” Which was suspicious as hell, now that he thought about. Could Vince be involved?

Fuck, he really should have figured out that tracker.

“I’ll come with you,” Marconi said. He gave a few orders to the other agents who were staying – including sending someone to speak to Vince after Howard gave him the address – and they were off.

Maria wasn’t happy about him leaving, but she understood that it was what he needed to do. Even if he got nothing useful, at least it made him feel like less of a failure. She would keep an eye on the phone with the FBI, in case someone called.

Conrad Wells, SI’s head of security, met them at the gate when they arrived.

“There is something you need to see, Mr Stark.”

He explained that they had found a breach in their security, which had allowed a man to enter the parking garage. The camera footage had been altered, but Wells’s team was able to recover it, and it clearly showed the same masked assassin from months ago – the damned Winter Soldier, who might or might not be Bucky Barnes – getting into Tony’s car. About an hour later, Tony had a nasty surprise when he got in the car himself.

“I spoke to the guard at the gate, and he said he didn’t see anyone or notice anything different about young Mr Stark,” Wells concluded. “No doubt the man had a gun trained on the kid.”

Howard swallowed hard. “I want to know how our security was compromised.” Not that it would help Tony now, of course.

“We are investigating it, Sir. It seems… It seems there might have been some… inside assistance.”

“Obie,” Howard snarled. It had to be. “Fucking bastard.”

“Mr Stark?” Marconi asked.

Howard told him about his current troubles with his former business partner, including the fact that the FBI had begun an investigation into him based on a tip from Howard. A couple of months ago, Howard would never have suspected Obie of being involved in something like this – they might have not always seen eye to eye on things, but Howard had considered the other man a friend. Now, however… The more he thought about it, the more suspicious it all sounded. The Winter Soldier had to have had some inside information to be able to bypass Howard’s security, both at the house and at SI, and while Obie was not a tech guy, he had, until recently, had access to SI security. Hell, for all Howard knew, he had other people in the company involved in whatever he was up to.

For the past few weeks, Howard had suspected that Obie had been doing something fishy, which had cemented his decision to get rid of him. He hadn’t been able to figure out what it was yet, but he was sure the White Collar division was going to turn up something. Obie’s reluctance to change the company’s focus, as well as his refusal of the severance package Howard had offered – which was very generous, all things considered – made a lot more sense if Obie had more to lose than just a job.

Still, would Obie have actually plotted to kidnap Tony? Stealing from the company was one thing; being involved in kidnapping (or even murder) was something else completely. Sadly, not something Howard could discount at this point.

And this was a kidnapping – fuck, it had to be. That meant Tony was still alive, and Howard could find him – because if killing Tony was all the Soldier had wanted to do, he would have just shot Tony the moment he’d got into the car.

“Do you really think Stane is involved? Has he made any threat against you?” Marconi asked, forcing Howard’s mind back on track.

They were going to find Tony. They had to.

“Well, sort of. He said I’d regret kicking him out. At the time, I didn’t think anything of it, but…” he trailed off.

“We’ll bring him in for an interrogation, and I’ll contact the agents who are already looking into him,” Marconi replied. “Can I use your phone?”

Howard nodded. “Yes, of course.” One of Wells’s guys led the agent into an office where he could make a call, leaving him with his head of security. “Do you have anything else that might help find Tony?”

“I’m afraid not, Sir. But I’m sure he’ll be found. If it…” he hesitated, then forged on. “If Mr Stane is involved, keeping Mr Tony alive is a better strategy.”

Howard certainly hoped so. However, the fact that the Winter Soldier was the kidnapper didn’t fill him with confidence.

Still, Tony was smart and resourceful. He knew as much as Howard did about the Soldier, and he was good at thinking on his feet.

Fuck, they really should have sorted out that tracker…

Tony was probably thinking the same thing. They had talked about it, tossed some ideas around, yet couldn’t come up with anything that would give off a good enough signal while also being small enough to carry around inconspicuously.

But that didn’t mean Tony couldn’t try something. If he had access to any kind of tech, perhaps…

“I need to get back to the workshop.”

“If we get anything else, I’ll let you know immediately. And I’ll start working on a complete audit of our security, Sir.”

“Yeah,” Howard agreed. “I want everyone’s access verified. Make sure to share your findings with the FBI. If Obie is involved, I want his ass nailed to the wall.”

Marconi came back just as Howard was leaving.

“A couple of agents are going to pick up Mr Stane,” he reported. “The White Collar agents are gathering all the info they have; finances, contacts, anything.”

“Good. I have to go home. There’s something… I need to check something.” It was a long shot that Tony would use something they had discussed, but at least it would give Howard something to do. Anything would be better than just sitting on his ass waiting for… something.

As he and Marconi drove back to the house, Howard considered whether he should go speak to Obie himself. As much as he wanted to know if his former partner had anything to do with Tony’s abduction, he also wasn’t sure he’d be able to handle it productively if that was indeed the case. Trying to strangle the man with his bare hands was unlikely to help him get his son back, after all, as satisfying as it might momentarily feel. Plus, he didn’t want to give Obie the satisfaction. Finding Tony was more important.

There had been no phone call with a ransom demand while Howard had been gone, and no news on Tony’s car either. Maria was climbing the walls in worry and fear, but there was nothing she could do. He told her what he had discovered on the security tapes, and that only made her more frightened.

“What are we going to do now?” she asked, hands wringing nervously.

This time seemed worse than before, when they’d had to cut their vacation short because Tony was missing. Now they knew more about the Winter Soldier, and whoever was behind him. Now Howard had been getting along with Tony, and he wanted them to be able to continue to get closer.

Tony had to be okay.

“I don’t know,” he replied. “The FBI are going to question Obie. Maybe… Maybe that will get some result.”

Maria’s face twisted in anger. “If that man has anything to do with what happened to Tony, I will rip his balls out myself,” she hissed. Maria rarely lost her temper, and she was not a violent person at all, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t be vicious when she needed to be. If Obie was involved, Maria was going to make him regret it, of that Howard had no doubt.

“I need to check something in the lab.”

“What? Now?”

“Tony and I talked about a tracker for this kind of situation. I want to see if maybe… if he figured out a way to get a signal to me.”

She nodded. “What are we waiting for, then?”

They left Jarvis to keep an eye on the FBI and the phones, and went to the workshop.

The stuff Tony had been working on the last couple of days was still where he had left it, parts and half-finished circuits thrown around. Even though Tony had his own workshop now, he sometimes showed up to work alongside Howard. Part of it was so that the two of them could discuss some of the ideas for the new tech for the company, but Howard also thought Tony was still testing his welcome. Despite all the improvement in their relationship, some hurt lingered, and it would take more time for them to feel completely comfortable together.

Focus, Howard, he told himself. Tony will be all right. He’ll come back safe and sound.

Pushing aside all the fear and anxiety eating away at him at the thought of what might be happening to his son, Howard got to work.

The thing about an emergency signal was that it needed to be both strong and specific. Specificity wasn’t too much of an issue, and Howard and Tony had considered many possibilities. Having a strong enough signal to reach across a long distance was a lot more complicated. If Tony had left New York, there was no way Howard would be able to pick up any kind of transmission. Even if he was still in the city, the chances weren’t very good depending on where he was.

Regardless, Howard was going to try. He could improve the strength of his reception if he tweaked some things here and there. Once that was done, he began systematically searching for all the specific frequencies they had considered.

It was a longshot, he knew, but it was better than just sitting on his ass waiting for something to happen. At least it was something to do, as hopeless as it might seem.

Jarvis brought him some coffee and sandwiches at some point, which Howard only ate at Maria’s insistence. He tuned out Maria and Jarvis’ conversation – a request for an update, but there was nothing new to report – and continued his search.

Suddenly, there was a beep.

“What was that?” Maria asked, abandoning Jarvis to come peer over Howard’s shoulder at the monitors. “Is that significant?”

Howard exhaled sharply. “I don’t know. It might be.” It could be any number of things, in truth, but Howard wanted to believe that it was Tony, that it was something they could use to find the kid. “Let me see if I can narrow down a location.”

“Shall I get Agent Marconi here, Sir?”

“No,” he replied. Howard would prefer not to have anyone outside the family here. “But tell him we might have a lead to follow, so he needs to be ready.”

Jarvis nodded and hurried out of the workshop.

Maria gripped his hand. “Find him, Howard. Please, find our son.”

“I will,” he promised, even though they both knew that was not something he – or anyone else – could guarantee.

After several minutes of fine-tuning the signal and rigging something he could take with him to help track the signal on the move, Howard was ready to leave. Maria wanted to go with him, of course, but he convinced her to stay behind with Jarvis in case anything else happened.

Marconi was waiting for him in the dining room, where the FBI had set up their equipment.

“Anything from Obie?” Howard asked.

Marconi shook his head. “He denied any involvement. My people are digging into him, but it’s going to take some time to find anything to give them any leverage. If there is anything to be found,” he added.

“There is.” Howard didn’t know what yet, but he was now absolutely certain that Obie was hiding something. And Howard would make sure he faced consequences for whatever scheme he was running.

Now, however, his priority was finding Tony.

He quickly explained about the possible transmission from Tony, and that he was going to track down the signal he’d found. Marconi didn’t seem completely convinced, but he didn’t raise any objection. Perhaps he wanted to indulge Howard – to allow him to do something – or perhaps he realized that Howard and Tony really were smart enough to figure something out. In any case, Howard got the backup he needed – because he certainly wasn’t stupid enough to go haring off after an assassin by himself; he was an engineer, he didn’t have any real combat training (not to mention being in his 70s)…

It was going on 10 pm – four hours since Tony had left SI – when Marconi and two other agents got into the car. Howard gave directions, using his portable tracker while keeping in touch with Jarvis back at the house via radio.

It was not exactly easy to follow the signal. Howard could only pick a direction and hope it was the right one. When the signal got weaker, he knew he’d chosen wrong, so he had the agent who was driving the car go a different way. Thus it took a few tries until he felt reasonably sure they were going in the right direction. Whether they would find Tony once they had homed in on the signal, however, was not at all certain.

“Somewhere around here,” Howard said at last.

The driver stopped the car and the agents, along with Howard, looked around to figure out where they were. Somewhere in Brooklyn, Howard thought. It was not a part of the city Howard was familiar with, but it looked like the kind of place criminals might want to hide in, given all the seemingly empty buildings and the general air of abandonment.

“Are you sure about this, Mr Stark?” Marconi asked.

Howard looked down at his device again and nodded. “The signal is definitely coming from here.”

“All right. Let’s have a look, then.”

Marconi nodded to the other agents and they got out of the car, fanning around to check out the surrounding area, hands close to their guns in case something happened.

Howard, who had brought a pistol with him as well, followed suit.

“Mr Stark, you should stay in the car,” Marconi told him.

“Like hell I will. This is my son.”

In the back of his mind, he remembered the look on Tony’s face when he’d said that Howard hadn’t been there when he’d come back after being kidnapped when he was a kid. Tony had believed that Howard didn’t care about him, and this time Howard was going to show his son how much he cared. He was going to be the first thing Tony saw, so there will be no doubt in his son’s mind about how much Howard loved him.

Of course that didn’t mean Howard was going to go in guns blazing; he wasn’t an idiot. He would let the professionals handle it, and just be there to take Tony home once the criminals had been dealt with.

Fortunately, Marconi didn’t argue, and Howard followed the agents from a safe distance.

“Sir,” the agent who had been driving – Agent Dent, Howard thought – pointed to something Howard couldn’t see. He got a little closer and his heart skipped a beat.

Tony’s car.

Fuck. They were in the right place after all.

Tony was here. Or, at the very least, had been here at some point. He had been missing for only four hours, so it was possible the kidnappers were still here. After all, ordinarily it would take a lot longer for a person to be reported missing (unless it was a child, but Tony was an adult now), and for the police to even begin to act. If not for the fact that Tony had been the target of the Winter Soldier before and that Howard was a very important man, the investigation wouldn’t even have started this early. Plus, without Tony’s ingenuity, they wouldn’t have found this location so soon.

Howard could only hope that all that meant Tony was still here, and unharmed.

Please, god, let him be all right. Praying had worked before, so he might as well do it again.

Marconi gestured for the agents to begin a more systematic search, and radioed for more backup now that they had confirmation that Tony’s car (and possibly Tony himself) was here.

Howard hung back, keeping an eye on his surroundings for anything suspicious. They came to an old warehouse that just screamed ‘criminal hideout’, and Dent peered inside through a dirty window. He made some hand gestures to the others, and they moved to secure the entrances or something.

A noise from inside made they all jump – someone was shouting something, though he couldn’t understand the words. A moment later, the door opened and two guys carrying guns appeared.

“FBI. Drop your weapons!” Marconi yelled.

Instead of doing the sensible thing and complying, however, the two men started shooting. Howard ran for cover and let the agents return fire. Fortunately, they were better shots that the bad guys, and managed to take the criminals out without any injury.

Of course, the noise attracted more of the kidnappers – fuck, how many were there? – and two more came out shooting.

“FBI! Drop your weapons!” Marconi repeated.

One of the man decided that running was a better idea than sticking around to be either killed or arrested, and made a break for it. Howard saw him from his hiding spot, but let the man go. It was one less to worry about as far as he was concerned.

After taking care of the other one, the agents went inside the warehouse. Howard followed, his own gun at the ready. It had been a very long time since he had actually shot someone, but he would do it if it was necessary to save his son.

There were four more criminals inside. Two opened fired while two ran away towards the back. Howard glanced around and saw no sign of Tony. There was a metal staircase off to the right that led to an upper level, though, where he could see a door to some kind of office. While the FBI managed the guys, Howard went up to find Tony. Just as he reached the door, it was opened from the inside, and another man emerged, holding Tony to him like a human shield, a gun pressed to the boy’s head.

Howard stopped dead, his own gun raised.

“Let him go, and you might get out of here alive,” Howard said with a calm he most definitely didn’t feel.

The man laughed. “I don’t think so.” He stepped forward and the fucking Winter Soldier came out of the room behind him, gun also in hand.

Fuck.

“Kill him,” Bad Guy said.

“Bucky! Help me!” Tony shouted.

To Howard’s (and the bad guy’s) surprise, the Soldier (was it really Bucky? Fuck! The resemblance really was uncanny) listened to Tony. Instead of shooting at Howard, he lunged at the bad guy and, quick as lightening, got the gun away from Tony. Tony then took the opportunity to drive an elbow into the man’s gut and wrench himself free.

Howard reached out a hand and yanked Tony behind him, gun still trained on the kidnapper, whoever the fuck he was.

The man grunted, looking at them all with contempt. The Soldier (Bucky?) was now just standing there, as if unsure what else to do. His eyes went from Tony to the unknown man.

“You’re going to pay for this.” Then the man started saying something in a foreign language – Russian, maybe? – which made Bucky back away in fear.

For the first time, he actually showed emotion; he stared at Howard and Tony with desperation.

“Dad! Do something!” Tony yelled.

With only a slight hesitation, Howard pointed his gun and squeezed the trigger, making the man slam against the wall with the impact. Before anyone else could do anything, Marconi ran up the stairs.

Tony immediately threw himself in front of Bucky, blocking the agent’s line of shot.

“Don’t shoot! Don’t shoot!” Howard and Tony screamed at the same time.

Tony continued to focus on the Soldier. “It’s all right, Bucky. It’s all right now. Drop the guns. Just drop them, come on. Listen to me.”

Bucky (was it really him? Jesus Christ) complied. The clatter of the metal hitting the floor was very loud in the ensuing silence. Howard lowered his own arm, though he didn’t release his grip on his weapon.

The kidnapper moaned and hissed something – again in Russian – which made Howard raise the gun again.

“Shut the fuck up or I’ll shoot you again. This time in the fucking head,” he hissed.

The other two agents showed up. At Marconi’s direction, they hauled up the kidnapper and cuffed him. One of them dragged him down the stairs, ignoring the man’s cries of pain, while the other eyed Bucky warily. Tony was still standing in front of him.

“Mr Stark?” Marconi asked, but Howard could only shake his head.

“Tony? Are you hurt, son?”

“No, dad. I’m okay. This is Bucky. He… he remembers who he is, a little. I promised him we’d help him.”

Howard nodded. Without the mask over his face, he did look exactly like Bucky from nearly fifty years ago. Howard’s crazy theory had been right after all. Damn.

“Bucky? You remember my dad, right? Howard Stark?”

“Bucky?” Howard put his gun away and stepped forward a little, arms raised to show he meant no harm. “Fuck, it’s been a long time. You’re gonna be all right now, okay? We’ll… we’ll sort things out.” Howard had no idea what was going on, really, but Bucky had just saved Tony’s life. That was more than enough for Howard to want to help him, despite the earlier attempt to kill the kid. Plus, he had known the man back in the day; if there was anything left of him to save, he was going to try.

Bucky nodded and his posture relaxed a tiny bit.

Satisfied that there would be no more shooting, Tony launched himself at Howard and held on tight.

“It’s okay, son. I’ve got you. You’re all right now,” Howard murmured.

“You came.”

Howard closed his eyes and hung on. “Of course I did. I love you, Tony.”

“Did you get my signal?”

“Yeah. Pretty smart, kid.”

The tension finally left Tony’s body and he sagged against Howard.

“I love you too, dad.”

There was still a hell of a mess to clean up, but Tony was safe, so all was good in Howard’s world now.

Chapter Text

Tony really wanted to go home. Even though he had only been kidnapped for a few hours, it felt like a lot longer, and he desperately wished for the comfort of his bedroom and his parents (and Jarvis). Unfortunately, he had to talk to the FBI and tell them everything that had happened. Plus, he was a little worried about leaving Bucky alone. The guy didn’t seem all that stable, and was one twitch away from either running away or killing someone.

Agent Marconi wanted to handcuff Bucky and take him into custody, but Tony convinced him it was a bad idea. Howard, still a bit thrown by finding out that his wild theory about the Winter Soldier’s identity was actually correct, nevertheless backed Tony up. While he was wary about the man, Bucky was sort of an old friend, and Howard was not the type to turn his back on a friend in need (it was something Tony had been surprised to learn about his father, in all honesty). So, in the end, Bucky was allowed to walk about unimpeded, though he had to surrender his weapons (two guns and four knives secreted all over his person, which made Tony raise an eyebrow).

Boss Guy and his minions were rounded up by all the extra agents that showed up after all the fighting was done, and arrested. A few more agents were dispatched to try to find the ones who had managed to get away, while the rest of them began searching the warehouse for any additional evidence of criminal activity.

Tony, Howard, Bucky and Marconi went to the FBI office in New York so Tony could make his official statement. He explained how he’d tried to get Bucky on his side by reminding the man of who he was and promising to help him – a promise he wanted to honor. He also told the agent how he had managed to send the signal that Howard tracked, and that Boss Guy had indicated that they wanted Tony alive for some no doubt nefarious reason that may or may not have involved extorting his father for money or favors.

“He didn’t say anything to indicate who he might be working for?”

“No, but whoever it was seems to have both money and connections. I got the feeling he was definitely part of something much bigger.”

Howard, who had been allowed in the room while Tony gave his testimony, nodded at that.

“There is something very worrying about all this.” Then he turned to Marconi. “What happened with Obie? Did your people get anything from him?”

“Obie?” Tony asked. “You think Obie was involved?” Sure, the company’s new direction and Obie’s subsequent firing had made the man really angry, but that was a quite a leap to think he might have been a part of this.

“Someone who had access to SI security was involved in your kidnapping,” his father said. “Obie is the most likely suspect because he’s the one with the grudge.”

“Oh.” Tony wasn’t sure how to feel about that. He couldn’t imagine Obie doing something like that. Sure, there had been some tension between them all for a few months now, and Tony had felt a bit… weird… around Obie at times. Still… Tony had trusted Obie once – Howard had too – and to find out he might have had something to do with this… That would be devastating.

“I haven’t had the chance to debrief with my people,” Marconi replied to Howard’s original question. “But you can rest assured that we will investigate the matter thoroughly. Perhaps the men we apprehended at the warehouse will be able to tell us more.”

Howard nodded. He was probably already thinking of how to update their security. Tony wanted to see what had been done so he could throw some ideas in as well. Increased security was definitely going to be a priority.

Tony had to admit he was a little worried about going back to school now, even with Vince. (He mentioned his suspicion that someone might have done something to Vince, and Howard and Marconi assured him that everything would be investigated.) Who knew how far this thing really went? Bucky might not be their pet assassin any more, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t find another one – and one Tony wouldn’t be able to bargain or reason with.

Marconi asked a few more questions and then said Tony could go home, to his and his father’s relief. Howard had already phoned the house to let his mom and Jarvis know they were all right, and mom was probably as anxious to see Tony as he was to see her.

However, there was one more issue to tackle before that could happen.

“What about Bucky?”

Marconi sighed. He’d had been rather skeptical of Howard’s explanation of who he was (which was understandable, of course. Bucky was supposed to be around his dad’s age, yet looked much closer to Tony’s), and there was also the matter of him being an assassin and kidnapper, brainwashed or not.

“We’ll have to interrogate him, see what he knows about this criminal organization.”

“He… He seemed to come and go,” Tony said. “Sometimes he looked like he knew who he was, and then it was like it slipped away. I had to keep reminding him, telling stories and stuff to keep him focused.”

“I can call Peggy and ask her to come and keep him company,” Howard offered, then shook his head. “No. No, I don’t think I can trust her with this. But maybe one of the others.” At Marconi’s inquiring eyebrow, he elaborated. “People who knew him back in the war, members of the Howling Commandos. A few are still alive and… well, lucid enough. It might help him keep grounded.”

“I think that’s a good idea, dad.”

“I need to use your phone,” Howard told Marconi, who agreed. They left the interview room to go to Marconi’s office. Tony waited with Marconi while his dad went to make the call.

“Where is he now?” Tony asked.

“In a locked room with a guard.”

“Away from the others, right?”

“Yes. I gave strict instructions.”

“Can I… Can I talk to him for a bit? Before we leave? Just to let him know I’m not just abandoning him or something.”

Marconi pursed his lips, but agreed, and led Tony to where the former Commando was waiting, sitting ramrod straight in the chair, one wrist cuffed to the table.

“Hi, Bucky,” Tony said. The faraway look in the man’s eye changed into one of recognition, though he didn’t speak. “Dad is calling someone to come stay with you, one of the Commandos.” There was a barely perceptible nod from the man, so Tony continued. “I don’t know what’s going to happen now, but dad and I are going to do what we can to help you, all right? And… I guess we’ll get you a lawyer or something.” It occurred to him that Bucky desperately needed legal representation if he was going to make a statement about his involvement in this mess. “So… once the lawyer comes… you should cooperate and do what they say. And… And then we’ll see what can done.”

It wasn’t much, but Tony didn’t feel comfortable making promises he didn’t know if he could keep. If Bucky really had been brainwashed, he might have a bit of a defense. However, getting people to buy that might not be so simple. Still, being locked in a psychiatric facility was probably better than being where he’d been before – or in a regular prison.

This time the nod was more obvious, and Tony counted it as a win. It meant Bucky was coherent enough to understand the situation he was in, and hopefully be able to assist in his own defense.

“We’re going to go home now,” Tony continued. “But we’ll be back tomorrow to check on you. All right?”

There was another clear sign of assent, so Tony left the room to go find his father and tell him about the lawyer. Of course his father had already thought of that, and had arranged for one to come as soon as possible.

Then, at last, Tony went home to be swept up into his mother’s (and Jarvis’s) loving arms.

It was good to be home.

*****

The next few weeks were a complete clusterfuck. The FBI investigation did turn up a great deal of evidence that Obie had been doing a lot of criminal stuff, including stealing SI weapons to sell on the black market to anyone who paid enough.

Howard was absolutely livid when he found out, both because it was a horrible thing to do and also because it put the entire company into question – and under investigation. Of course, he had already been in the process of a thorough internal audit, and he’d been the one to call the FBI to investigate possible fraud in the first place, but this meant even more scrutiny from the FBI, the freaking CIA and whoever else, and it was just a huge mess.

There was little Tony could do to help his dad, though. He didn’t actually have a position in the company (aside from being an intern), and thus had no authority to say or do anything on SI’s behalf. All they could do was try to weather the storm as best as they could.

When the investigation made the news, it got even worse. Their stocks took a dive and a couple of investors backed out of deals that were nearly closed, which was another blow. Worse, in Tony’s estimation, was that Obie was not the only one involved in the criminal scheme – at least seven other people were arrested, including someone high up in the finance department.

Howard swore at length about the whole thing, and there was a lot of yelling in the house. Tony had decided against returning to school just yet so he could be there to support his dad and make sure the criminal organization who had tried to kidnap him wouldn’t try again (and to prevent another kidnapping attempt). The tension was high, but Tony, Maria and Jarvis did their best not to lose their heads too – Howard’s rage and frustration were understandable, and would hopefully pass once the investigation was concluded and everyone involved paid for their crimes.

Aside from that – which was bad enough – Obie had helped in Tony’s kidnapping by providing information about SI security and Tony’s bodyguard, who had indeed been poisoned so he would not interfere with the kidnapping. Obie denied being the one to order the kidnapping, though it was obvious that he had assisted the criminal group responsible for it. In an effort to try to save his own ass, he agreed to give all the information he had on the kidnappers – which wasn’t really much, apparently, but every little bit helped.

Both Tony and Howard had been pretty pissed off about him getting any sort of deal, but the FBI agents explained that it would not save him from a lengthy sentence; at most he would get a few more privileges in prison. Howard had snarled anyway, but Maria had been the one to remind them that snitches didn’t usually do well in prison, and that mollified Howard a bit (Maria had been pretty damn pissed herself about what Obie had done, and Tony was sure she wouldn’t shed a tear if anything unfortunate happened to Obie in prison; Tony had not been aware of his mother’s ruthless side, but he had to admit he was impressed).

There was still a long way to go before the real culprits of the kidnapping could be found and arrested, however. The Boss Guy from the warehouse had killed himself while in custody before he could be properly questioned. The method he used was a cyanide capsule hidden in his tooth, which Howard had told Tony was the same method that Hydra operatives had used back in the war. Some of the minions arrested, fortunately, had been a bit more forthcoming. While they claimed to have been hired goons with no real knowledge of what was going on, they did nevertheless provide the authorities with some useful information.

That, along with Obie’s testimony, gave the investigators a place to start.

While all that was going on, Bucky had eventually managed to give some kind of statement, which pointed to some important people being part of some criminal organization that dealt in murder, blackmail and intimidation to achieve its, for the moment, murky purposes. Despite the fact that his memory was spotty, Bucky did manage to remember some conversations he had heard, which included names of both targets and criminals. Even so, it was slow going – to the frustration of the investigators (and the Starks).

Bucky’s case was, naturally, a lot more complicated. Per his lawyer’s advice, he had not admitted to any crimes except Tony’s kidnapping (and the attempted robbery last December). The lawyer, a Mr Fallow, wanted to get him assessed by a doctor in order to determine his mental state and then attempt to come up with a deal to divulge unsolved crimes in exchange for immunity or, at least, a reduced sentence, which would be served in a psychiatric facility rather than a regular prison so Bucky could get the treatment he so desperately needed.

Not everyone was happy with that, of course, but Howard used his influence to help the deal to go through. He argued that Bucky had voluntarily turned on his boss to help Tony, and that he was, for all intents and purposes, a POW who deserved some consideration. The psychiatrist’s preliminary report agreed with that.

There was also the matter of the man’s prosthetic arm, which Tony thought was a marvel of technology – as well as being creepy as hell with all the stuff that was in it, including something that sent an electroshock pulse through Bucky when he got too distressed. At Bucky’s own request, the arm was removed and locked in a secure vault in the FBI. Tony (and his dad) really wanted to take a closer look at it to figure out how it worked, but that was probably not going to happen – which may be for the best, actually.

Both Tony and Howard had gone to visit Bucky in the FBI holding cell a few times, and it seemed to help him. Tony was no longer afraid of the dead-eyed assassin that had shot at him in December. Now he could see the man Bucky used to be, and it made him more compassionate than scared. It would be a very long recovery, no doubt, but there did seem to be some hope. Not having that creepy arm had done wonders for Bucky’s mental well-being, and he seemed less strung-out all the time.

Dum Dum Dugan had been visiting Bucky regularly since that first day, and that was also helping to keep his mind in the here and now, according to Dugan. He’d brought pictures to show the man, and Bucky now had several of them in his cell. Sometimes he even pointed out the men he remembered for Tony with a little anecdote about them.

With Dugan getting involved, it didn’t take long for Peggy Carter to find out about Bucky, though – and that really didn’t go the way anyone had expected.

It had started well enough; he remembered her (mostly as “the gal Steve was sweet on”) and they’d had a short conversation. However, at some point she had mentioned SHIELD, and Bucky had lost his shit big time.

Tony hadn’t been there that day, but he heard about it from the guard the next day (as they had become somewhat friendly after all the visits) that Bucky had growled and lunged awkwardly at Peggy, who had barely managed to get out of the way. As soon as Peggy had been removed from the cell, though, Bucky had started shouting in Russian. The guard had no idea what he’d said, but it had sounded both angry and scared.

The next day, with his lawyer present, Bucky had told the investigators about SHIELD – and Hydra. And the fact that the two were pretty much one and the same.

Tony wasn’t privy to all the details, but it seemed that SHIELD had recruited a lot of former Hydra scientists after the war – a very stupid move, in his opinion – and they had, over the decades, used that to recreate their former organization within SHIELD. Not everyone in SHIELD knew about it, but there were enough people in high positions who used the intel SHIELD had for their own purposes.

With more names to go on, the investigators began uncovering more and more information about Hydra, and it did not paint a pretty picture. Plus, they were the ones who had brainwashed Bucky, by using a lot of torture methods. One of these was something Bucky called The Chair, which seemed to work like some sort of lobotomy, as far as Tony understood the explanation given. It was, in short, horrific.

Howard, predictably, was utterly incensed by the whole thing, and got drunk for the first time since Christmas.

Tony found him in the workshop, hammering some poor unsuspecting piece of metal to death while cursing up a storm.

“Dad,” Tony said, causing Howard to turn around, overbalance, and fall ass first on the ground, the hammer slipping from his hand.

“Fuck!” he yelled.

“Shit, dad.” Tony rushed forward to help his dad up, and was brushed off.

“Get off me. Leave me the fuck alone.”

Tony took a deep breath and resisted the urge to respond (or to run away like a scared kid). Howard was really upset, but it had nothing to do with Tony. His coping method was shit, of course, but Tony could understand why he’d turned to the bottle. And now that Tony wasn’t a child anymore, he wanted to help – and he hoped he could.

“It’s not your fault, dad,” Tony said when Howard had settled himself in his favorite chair. “You didn’t know.”

The look on Howard’s face was rather heartbreaking, Tony thought.

He’d been getting to know his father better these last few months, and what he’d found was a man who was more self-critical than Tony had ever imagined, and who took failures to heart. He’d already been upset about SHIELD and his involvement in it when he’d only been suspicious of their problems. Now that he knew for a fact that they (or, at least, a part of them) had committed terrible crimes, it was obviously much worse.

“It’s not your fault, dad,” Tony repeated, since he wasn’t sure it had really sunk in the first time.

“How do you know that?” he asked, in a timid voice. “I… I gave them money. Without it they might not–”

“Don’t,” Tony interrupted. “Don’t think like that. You didn’t know. You couldn’t have known. In fact, I imagine they went to a lot of trouble to keep you from finding out, because they would have known that you’d never let that go.”

Howard just looked at Tony for a moment, then he nodded. “That blood is still on my hands, though.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong except trust the wrong people, dad,” Tony countered. “They are the ones with blood on their hands.”

Tony could understand the feeling, though. If it was him, he wasn’t sure he would be wrecked with guilt too. The thought of someone taking something from him and using it to do awful things was not a comfortable one, and it make him all the more glad that SI was stepping down from weapons production. It was a slippery slope if one really thought about it. Even if the weapons were used for supposed ‘good’, they would still leave a trail of death and destruction that Tony really didn’t want on his conscience.

There was a minute easing of the tension in Howard’s shoulders, then he collapsed into the work bench as if all his energy had suddenly run out.

He told Tony about the worrying things he had discovered with some buddy of his in the military – fraud, murders, cover-ups, blackmail and who knew what else. “And now I find that is was all Hydra, and Hydra is SHIELD. So that means I’m implicated too.”

“But now you know. Now you can help take them down,” Tony replied, trying to make his dad feel better.

“I’m so fucking tired, Tony,” he mumbled.

“I know, dad. But it’s going to be okay. We’ll figure this out.” He waited a moment, and when nothing more was forthcoming, continued. “Let’s get you some coffee, huh? Maybe a nap will help too.”

With a groan, Howard stood. He clutched at his back and moaned in pain.

“Ah, fuck. I’m too old for this shit.”

Tony put an arm around his dad’s waist and helped him walk to the door. Jarvis was waiting outside, and took Howard’s other side.

“Are you hurt, Sir?”

“He fell,” Tony replied. “Might be a good idea to call Doctor Mason.”

Jarvis nodded, and they carried Howard to his room. By the time he got on the bed, whatever injury he’d given himself seemed to be worse, so Jarvis left to get the doctor.

Maria came in and gave Howard such a disappointed look that Tony wanted to run and hide. His dad, however, seemed to be in too much pain to really acknowledge it.

“What have you done to yourself?”

“He fell, mom.” Tony did not mention the alcohol, but of course everyone had noticed that.

“I got this, honey,” she told him, and Tony knew a dismissal when he heard one.

“You’re gonna be all right, dad. Get some rest now, ok?”

“Yeah, thanks,” was the mumbled reply.

Tony really hoped his dad would be able to bounce back from this.

*****

With SHIELD/Hydra exposed, the media circus got even worse, and Howard came to the spotlight once again. After dodging reporters for several days, he finally decided to take the bull by the horns, as it were. It was Maria who suggested doing an interview and telling the public the truth. The rumors and questions weren’t going to stop, and it would be better for them to take at least some control of the narrative, to which Howard reluctantly agreed. Maria also chose the journalist, screened the questions and oversaw the set up for the interview, which would be done in their house. Moreover, she insisted in being present to support her husband and show that their family was united.

Tony watched his mom taking charge of everything and was really impressed – and proud. He could only hope be as good as her one day.

He wanted to be there too, but Maria thought it would be better to limit his exposure for now. He would give a separate interview later, they decided, once things were a bit calmer.

Tony was allowed to be in the room, though, with the understanding that he would not appear in camera at all.

From his position behind the cameras, he thought Howard did a great job showing his sorrow and regret over what SHIELD became, and how he wanted to help the people affected even though he was not directly at fault for anything. He came off as very human (flawed, but still trying his best) and empathetic towards others’ suffering. Bucky’s case was also discussed, which would hopefully get more people on his side. SI’s new direction – away from weapons – was officially announced, and came as a bit of a surprise to the journalist, though she rallied quickly with a series of follow-up questions that allowed Howard to elaborate on how that had been in the works for a while, and to state that he absolutely believed it to be the right decision, despite the fact that he knew many people would not be happy about it.

All in all, it was a good interview, and the response to it was positive when it aired. Of course there were still plenty of people who accused Howard of using the situation for his own gain, and some who didn’t believe he was innocent of SHIELD/Hydra’s crimes, but they had expected that.

At the end of October, Tony finally went back to college, after being absent for nearly two months. He had spoken to his professors to explain the situation (the danger he was still in until the Hydra criminals who had kidnapped him were all apprehended) and had gotten his assigned reading done, as well as some of the practicals, at home. Still, he was looking forward to being back in his apartment with Rhodey, with whom he had spoken often on the phone but not seen in person since his trip to Philly.

“Honeybear!” Tony exclaimed when he opened the door, a huge smile on his face.

“Tony! Shit, kid, I’ve missed you.”

Tony jumped on his friend and almost sent them both crashing to the floor. “Missed you too.”

Ignoring the pang of desire with the ease of long practice, Tony grinned when he was set back on the ground.

“How are you? Is everything all right? Are you safe now?” Rhodey asked, looking Tony up and down as if inspecting him for damage.

“Things are as good as they can be for now. I don’t think I’ll ever be completely safe.” It was something he had had to come to terms with in the last few months. Even if Hydra was completely gone, there was no guarantee that he wouldn’t be a target again; being rich certainly had its disadvantages. It was not a comforting thought, of course, but Tony was determined not to let fear and paranoia rule his life. He would just take all the precautions he could and try to be happy.

“Man, I’ve been reading about shit on the news and it’s pretty crazy. That Winter Soldier stuff…”

“Tell me about it,” Tony replied.

Bucky was doing a bit better now, though still a long way from all right. While he remained in FBI custody, he was getting regular visits from a psychiatrist, and was fully mentally present more often than not. He had even got a visit from his grandniece, which had sent him into a fit of tears but ultimately made him more determined to get his shit together.

Peggy Carter had been questioned about SHIELD/Hydra activities and had denied all knowledge of wrong-doing. She had attempted to contact Howard several times, yet he had stood firm that he wanted nothing to do with her anymore. His dad had told Tony that he really didn’t believe Peggy had known about Hydra, but that didn’t make much difference in the end, since SHIELD was plenty bad enough on its on, and Peggy’s ruthlessness and controlling tendencies had played a part in allowing Hydra to fester unchecked. Her fate was still up in the air.

The investigation would probably take years to complete, and even longer to prosecute all involved parties. It was a gigantic mess that would have repercussions for a long time, illuminating dark corners everywhere where power-hungry criminals had been hiding and pulling strings for decades.

For Tony, though, the most important result was how the whole thing had brought his family together. He was looking forward to their Christmas vacation together, and whatever else they decided to do.

There was hope for the future.