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Megatronus. A name that brings hope and joy. I adored him, looked up to him even. I shedded tears when I first laid my eyes upon him and declared my ever loyalty to his cause. But that loyalty also extended to him as well. I loved him. He was beautiful, a sight to behold, his words brought such determination to change our unfair world.
I wanted to make him proud, I wanted him to sing praises of my deeds. I wanted that acknowledgment from him. And he gave them! He sang praises, he would tell me how well I’ve done. He made me his second in command! He was supportive and…
He was beautiful.
He treated me as if that of an older sibling would, comforted me through troubling moments of this war. He was calm, collected, and kind. He always listened to what I had to say. And held me softly in his servos, those very servos that are strong enough to crush me, but instead it made me feel safe and protected. He was a figure in my life that I thought I had lost so long ago. And by Primus was he beautiful. I loved him.
But all of that changed. The war damaged him. He was quick to anger, he was no longer the calm, collected, and kind bot that I’ve come to admired and love. No. He was a tyrant of his own making. He lost his sight of the goal that we decepticons fought for. All the hope and admiration that was directed towards him changed to absolute dread and fear.
It was only a matter of time before he directed that anger towards someone. I should’ve know that it would soon be directed at me. But I was naive, foolish, and full of hope that this change would pass. That he would go back to being beautiful…
I was wrong.
His insanity clouded his thoughts and the way he viewed everything. He was power hungry. He became the very thing that he was fighting against. He wanted absolute power and control over everyone. So he used me, perhaps cause we were too alike at times so he has grown to hate me as I’ve grown to hate him. I no longer felt safe in those loving servos that held me so long ago in comfort. He now used those same servos to inflict pain upon me. No matter how much I cried and pleaded with him to stop, he never listens anymore.
He was no longer beautiful.
Yet I never left his side. No matter how many times he has hurt me, no matter how many times I’ve tried to hurt him in anger and resentment for what he has done to me. I never left. And when I did I always.. always returned back to his side, and he always let me back in. For I cannot live without him as he cannot live without me.
He is the fire and I am the oxygen that feed of each other destructively. For one cannot burn without the other. And he became beautiful in a sick and twisted disgusting way. We’re both mech’s of our flaws and know that no one else will accept us for the monsters we are, except each other. So we stick to that one comforting thought no matter how much we hurt each other for it.
It’s Sickeningly Beautiful.