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“And then he goes and leaves ALL the cabinet door open just to PROVE A POINT! It accidentally left one open once- well, alright maybe more than once- and THIS is how he retaliates?! Seriously living with him is a pain!!” Feng Xin shouted his voice carrying through the bar. A few patrons turned to look at him a mix of curiosity and annoyance.
“Hey, you. Stop yelling so loud, you’re going to scare off my customersw.” Hua Cheng called out from behind the bar, sleeves rolled up revealing a tattooed arm as he cleaned a glass cup.
Beside him, Xie Lian tried his best to focus on the conversation and not get lost in the way his fiancées muscles flexed with every moment. Swallowing hard, he quickly turned back towards his childhood friend.
“Well, Feng Xin, you were the one who chose to room with him.”
“It wasn’t my choice!!!” Feng Xin snapped. “When Shi Qingxuan mentioned he’d found the perfect place for me after my breakup- how the hell was I supposed to know it’d be with HIM?!”
Hua Cheng chuckled darkly and Xie Lian tried to barely managed to cover his mouth to stifle his own laughter, coughing lightly.
“Look at it this way.” Xie Lian said, patting Feng Xin’s arm. “Maybe this will help you two get closer. I did notice your fights have winded down a bit these past few weeks. Last week I only had to make you train idioms four times instead of six. That’s practically a record!”
Feng Xin groaned.
It had been three weeks since he’d moved in with Mu Qing- the most vexing and insufferable person he had ever known. Why the hell had Shi Qingxuan ever thought they’d make a good match living together?!
As if that weren’t bad enough, Mu Qing was practically a clean freak. A germaphobe almost! Who the hell had their home THAT clean?! How could anyone live in such a state?!
And then there were the…other things.
For example…
When Feng Xin first moved in, he had set a few of his gym and archery equipment on the kitchen table after training.
It hadn’t even been five seconds before he put his stuff down that Mu Qing stormed in, almost as if having a fifth sense of things Feng Xin did to piss him off, and yelled at him.
“Why the hell are you putting all this shit on the table?!”
Feng Xin looked up from where he had been drinking a cup of water. “Huh?”
“Don’t huh me! Move it. Now”
“Ugh, you! It’s just my bow!” Feng Xin said, moving towards him. “I was just setting it down while I got a drink!”
“Can’t you do that AFTER putting ally out stuff away? How the hell are you so messy, huh? No wonder you struggled to find a roommate, with living habits like this” My Qing rolled his eyes.
“Excuse me?! I’ll have you know I am NOT that messy! It’s just because I’m still settling in!”
“That’s an excuse and you know it!”
“Well if it bothers you that much why don’t YOU clean up after me huh?!”
The two of them were now nose to nose, and upon hearing that Mu Qing saw red, grabbing Feng Xin by the collar of his tank top.
“Like hell I’d clean up after a slob like you! I can’t believe I have to be the one to teach you to tidy up after yourself!”
“Yeah right, as if you could! You can’t make me do shit!”
“Oh, I’ll make you!”
Mu Qing shoved him against the table, pressing him back with force- until they both realized their positions.
Their breaths were heavy, their faces flushed as they looked at each other.
The air in the room changed, the whole place seemed hotter than usual.
They let go immediately.
Of course there was also the other problem. The way Mu Qing made him…feel.
His heart raced whenever he saw him. But it was obviously out of hatred, right?
But also, was it normal tofos your breath to hitch when your weird clean freak kind of lifelong enemy came out of the shower, tower slung low on his hips?
Or for his fingers to twitch whenever Mu Qing let his hair down to comb it, gently running his fingers through his hair, wishing he could be the one to touch it?
But he hated him. Obviously.
Given the awkward situations they had found themselves in, Feng Xin couldn’t help but complain and want to pick a fight every time he saw Mu Qing.
Which was why now he was drowning his frustrations and complaints to Xie Lian and Hua Cheng- because what else was he supposed to do?
“He’s just so annoying- I don’t even want to see him!” Feng Xin grumbled before taking another sip from his drink.
“Yes we can tell with the way you constantly talk about him.” Hua Cheng deadpanned, making Xie Lian gently nudge his arm.
“San Lang!”
“I’m just saying Gege” Hua Cheng continued, unfazed. “The way this guy talks about Mu Qing is like when a seven year old talks about their crush- except instead of holding hands to woo him he just tries to punch him. Which is pathetic.”
Feng Xin spat out his drink.
Hua Cheng’s eye darkened. “Hey. This wood is not cheap you know?”
“Crush?! What the fuck?! What the actual fuck?! Who would have a crush on that- that pretty faced clean freak!”
“Gege, see? He called him pretty.”
“I’m just stating facts! I can think he’s pretty and still hate him!”
Xie Lian rubbed his forehead. “Feng Xin it does seem like you’re a bit in denial about something.”
“About what?! Why in the world would I-”
“FENG XIN YOU IDIOT!!” A voice called out from the doorway.
The entire bar turned silent as every pair of eyes turned towards the voice.
On the doorway stood a beautiful woman, her arms crossed.
Even with the furious scowl on her face, it only made her sharp features more beautiful.
“Lan-bao! W-what are you-?!”
Before Feng Xin could finish the woman- Jian Lan, stormed over and slapped him in the face.
“You moron! You told me the pull out method would be safe! How could you be so stupid?!”
Feng Xin gently cradled his now reddened cheek, looking at her in shock. “It is supposed to work.”
“Well it clearly didn’t you dumbass!” She reached into her bag, pulled something out and threw it towards him.
Feng Xin barely caught it, nearly fumbling. He looked down, his face draining of color b
A pregnancy test.
“I…Lan-bao I…I…”
“You what?! Agh, I knew I shouldn’t have gone through it! How the hell am I supposed to raise a child?!”
“Wha- you’re keeping it?!”
“Yes I am! I’ve always wanted a family but- but not like this! I didn’t want the father to be an idiot like you.”
“Okay- don’t you think you’re being a little rude right now- oh.” Feng Xin stopped and squinted his eyes at her. Wait…are you hormonal?”
Silence.
The entire bar stared at Feng Xin in silence.
The only sound was of Xie Lian face palming behind them, while Hua Cheng struggled to contain his laughter.
“What?” Feng Xin looked around in confusion, before he was slapped on the same spot again.
“YOU ARE SUCH AN IDIOT HOW DID I EVER DATE YOU?!” Jian Lan quickly turned on her heel and flipped him off.
“W-wait, Jian Lan, I can still be a father! Don’t leave! I’ll pay child support!”
His pleads were ignored, and Xie Lian placed a firm hand Feng Xin’s shoulder to stop him from chasing after her.
“Well. That was something.” Hua Cheng said, his voice cracking from trying not to laugh.
“Feng Xin, are you alright?” Xie Lian asked, squeezing his shoulder
“I…I don’t know.” Feng Xin murmured. “I don’t even know how child support works.”
Hua Cheng cackled and slid a cup of whiskey towards him. Feng Xin gulped it down in one go.
“If you want, I could call Ling Wen” Xie Lian said gently. “ You’ll probably need a lawyer. Plus we can-”
“FENG XIN YOU IDIOT!!” A voice called out from the doorway.
The bar went silent.
Again.
Feng Xin stiffened. Was Jian Lan back?
On the door, with his arms crossed and radiating fury, was none other than… Mu Qing!
The customers, now invested in this free soap opera that was unfolding before their eyes, watched in silence.
“M-Mu Qing?! What the fuck do you want now?” Feng Xin groaned. He was the last person he wanted to see right now.
“Hah, what do I want now, WHAT DO I WANT NOW?!” He scoffed, walking towards him.
“You’re an idiot that’s what!!”
Feng Xin blinked utterly lost, glancing at Hua Cheng and Xie Lian, who shrugged their shoulders.
“Did I put my bow in the wrong place again? I swear I-”
“This has NOTHING to do with your stupid bow!!” Mu Qing grabbed him by the collar. “But it has to do with your dumb fucking aim!”
With his free hand shoved something towards Feng Xin’s chest.
Feng Xin looked down. His stomach dropped.
A pregnancy test.
Positive.
Hua Cheng let out a low whistle. “Well Gege, it seems you were right about them becoming closer.”
Feng Xin’s mouth opened, closed and then opened again. “Wait, wait, wait. You’re pregnant?!”
“You said you were good at the pull out method! I thought you had it handled!!” Mu Qing yelled, too angry to care about the scene he was making.
“I- I was! Or, was at least I thought I was- I DON’T KNOW ANYMORE!” Feng Xin cried out and placed his head in his hands. “I- how the fuck am I supposed to deal with two kids now!”
Mu Qing froze, his eye twitching. “Two?”
“So, funny story-. Jian Lan is pregnant as well. I mean, it was obviously before you and I did anything but she-”
A loud SLAP! Rang across the room, and Feng Xin cradled his other cheek, wincing.
“You’re an absolute brainless moron! A dumb, dumb stupid idiot! Who are you getting everyone in the town pregnant?! Who’s next huh?! Xie Lian?!”
Hua Cheng scoffed immediately, mumbling “yeah right” under his breath, before adding something about chopping off Feng Xin’s damn reproductive organs if he even thought about it.
“What?! No! I just- look it was an accident”
“Oh so sleeping with me was an accident?!”
“No, no, no sleeping with you was great” he blurted out before choking on his own words, face red. “I just- I- look I’ll take responsibility alright? I’ll take care of you and the baby! If you…want.”
Mu Qing stared at him, whatever words he was about to say dying in his throat. His eyes widened. “You would…be a family with me…and the baby?”
“I-If you wanted.” Feng Xin flushed and Mu Qing expression softened.
It was a few seconds before he smiled softly- and Feng Xin felt his breath be taken away, both in awe and disbelief.
“I…I would like that. Very much.” Mu Qing said softly.
Feng Xin smiled back and reached out, giving Mu Qing’s hand a gentle squeeze.
“Plus,” he added with a nervous chuckle, “that would mean I wouldn’t have to pay double child support right?”
Silence.
Then, THWACK!
Feng Xin collapsed face first onto the bar table, his nose bleeding a bit, as Mu Qing looked at angrily, seething.
“YOU IDIOT. YOU DUMB IDIOT, HOW ARE YOU SO STUPID! I’M THROWING OUT ALL YOUR THINGS!!”
With that final shout Mu Qing turned on his heels and stormed out of the bar.
The room was remained in silence for a few beats. Then, as if nothing had happened the costumers resumed drinking and chatting.
Xie Lian gently helped Feng Xin hold a bag of ice on his face. Feng Xin groaned , lying face down on the table again as he mumbled in confusion.
“Hey.” Hua Cheng eventually called out.
Feng Xin grunted in acknowledgement.
“Feng Xin,” Xie Lian said at the same time and sighed.
“You do know…there are condoms right?”
