Chapter Text
Shauna wasn’t the type of girl to have a crush.
She wasn’t giggling over boys in class, whispering about their latest obsessions. She had Jeff, after all — her safe choice. The guy everyone assumed she’d end up with. The guy Jackie had practically handed to her on a silver platter.
And yet…
Every time she found herself at the convenience store counter, handing over money for some energy drink or snack she didn’t even want, she had to admit— at least to herself — that she might be obsessed with someone.
Not a guy.
Which broke the entire palace of expectations that she and everyone else created for herself.
Jackie Taylor wasn’t supposed to work. She was supposed to be lounging by the pool, making plans, living her effortless, charmed life. Not standing behind the counter of a shitty little convenience store, wearing an fucking cute red dress with polka dots, rocking chipped pink nail polish. Who does she think she is?
She wasn’t supposed to... make her feel things.
And yet, she does.
And here Shauna was, walking in again for the third time this week, hoping she wouldn’t get caught staring. Trying not to look like a stalker.
Jackie glanced up from her phone, a lazy smirk already forming. “Starting to think you’re my favorite customer.”
Shauna rolled her eyes, grabbing a drink from the cooler just to give herself something to do. “Don’t flatter yourself.”
Jackie leaned against the counter, watching her. “You’re here more than my actual regulars.”
Shauna walked up, placing her drink in front of Jackie without meeting her eyes. “Maybe I just like energy drinks.”
Jackie snorted. “Sure. And I’m a straight-A student.”
Shauna finally looked at her, half-expecting some smug expression. But Jackie wasn’t teasing — not exactly.
Shauna swallowed. “Shut up and ring me up.”
Jackie tapped a few buttons on the register but didn’t break eye contact. “So… what do you do when you’re not pretending to care about overpriced drinks?”
Shauna blinked. “What?”
Jackie tilted her head. “You know. Pretty much everyone at school knows. Do you just go home, stare at the ceiling, and pretend like your life’s already planned out for you?”
The words hit harder than they should have.
Shauna clenched her jaw. “At least I have a plan.”
Jackie’s smirk wavered, just for a second.
Then she shrugged. “Touché.”
They were quite close in elementary school, but then came high school and everything got confusing... always was, in the late-night sleepovers, in the way Jackie always dared Shauna to do things she wouldn’t on her own, in the way Shauna always followed.
But they weren't kids anymore.
Shauna grabbed her drink and turned, ready to escape—
“Hey.”
She froze.
Jackie was still watching her, fingers tapping against the counter. “You should come by when I’m on break.”
Shauna’s grip tightened on the bottle. “Why?”
Jackie’s smirk returned, but there was something softer underneath.
“Because,” she said simply, “I think you want to.” she paused, "For old times' sake... I kinda miss you."
—
Shauna told herself she wouldn’t go back.
She had to stop. It was ridiculous, like a time-loop — walking into that convenience store, pretending like she needed something when all she was doing was making an excuse to see her.
Jackie.
Jackie, who had changed so much but somehow still had the same effect on her. Who still had that effortless confidence, that smirk that made Shauna’s stomach tighten in ways she didn’t want to examine too closely.
Jackie, who was suddenly standing right in front of her again.
Because Shauna had gone back. Of course she had.
And now she was here, in the middle of the tiny, fluorescent-lit store, gripping a bag of chips like it was some kind of lifeline, as Jackie leaned on the counter, watching her with an expression that was too much — too amused, too knowing, too Jackie.
“Didn’t think you’d show.” Jackie tapped her nails against the counter, feigning boredom.
Shauna scoffed. “You literally invited me.”
Jackie smirked. “Yeah, but you’re weird about this kind of thing.”
Shauna’s stomach flipped. “Weird how?”
Jackie shrugged. “You overthink. You convince yourself you don’t want something, even when you do.”
Shauna clenched her jaw. “That’s not true. Maybe I've changed.”
Jackie just raised an eyebrow.
Fuck, she was right.
Shauna had overthought this. She had spent too much time debating whether coming back meant something — if it would look like she was following Jackie’s lead again, if it would mean admitting something to herself she wasn’t ready to face.
Because it wasn’t just about the store.
It wasn’t just about the stupid energy drinks or Jackie’s sudden job for the summer or the way things had shifted between them lately.
It was about the fact that Jackie had always been the center of Shauna’s world, and Shauna had never questioned why. And that's dangerous.That's why she told herself that starting in high school she wouldn't take herself for granted again. Shauna would be her own person.
Standing in front of Jackie makes her question even her own breathing.
Jackie’s voice broke through the spiral of her thoughts. “You gonna stand there all day, or are you gonna sit with me?”
Shauna blinked as Jackie gestured toward the small break room door behind the counter.
Her heart stuttered.
She had two options. She could laugh this off, pretend she didn’t care, grab her chips and leave like none of this mattered.
Or she could step through that door.
Step closer.
She knew which choice she should make.
And yet, she muttered, “Fine,” and followed Jackie inside.
The break room was small and cluttered — an old table, a half-broken vending machine, a couch shoved against the wall. Jackie flopped onto the couch without hesitation, stretching out like she owned the place. As always.
Shauna, meanwhile, hesitated by the doorway.
Jackie patted the spot beside her. “I don’t bite, you know.”
Shauna rolled her eyes but sat down, keeping a careful inch of space between them.
Jackie grinned, tapping her foot against Shauna’s. A habit from when they were kids — something she always did when they sat together, like she needed to remind Shauna she was there.
Shauna ignored the way her skin burned at the contact.
“So,” Jackie said, playing with her necklace. “Are you ever gonna tell me why you finally wanted to talk to me again?”
Shauna scoffed. She can't help it. “You’re the one who asked me to come.”
Jackie hummed. “Yeah, but you didn’t have to listen.”
Shauna didn’t have an answer to that.
Jackie turned her head, watching her closely. Her expression was softer now — not teasing, not smug. Just… curious. Like she couldn’t waiting for Shauna to admit something.
And Shauna — who had spent years pushing certain thoughts and feelings down so deep they barely had air to breathe — felt the weight of it pressing down on her.
She swallowed. “I just... we learn that high school is a transformative time but... i like coming here.”
Jackie’s lips curled at the edges. “Because of me?”
Shauna’s stomach twisted.
Jackie tilted her head. “You don’t have to answer that. I already know.”
Shauna’s heart slammed against her ribs. She should deny it. Call Jackie annoying, change the subject, pretend this wasn’t happening.
Jackie always did that, act like she already knew what she was feeling, what she was thinking. Shauna stay quiet.
Jackie just smirked and tapped her foot against Shauna’s again — once, soft, steady.
Shauna didn’t know what was worse: the fact that Jackie had basically called her out, or the fact that she hadn’t denied it.
That she couldn’t deny it.
It was like Jackie had peeled back something raw inside her — like she’d taken all the quiet, buried feelings Shauna had spent years ignoring and just… Her picked it up and took it off his body with her bloody hands and thought it was funny look at them. Held them up to the light, waiting for Shauna to admit what they both already knew.
Shauna was sitting next to her on the couch, too aware of every inch of space between them. Of the way Jackie’s foot was still pressed lightly against hers. She was waiting. She knew Shauna wouldn’t move away.
Shauna swallowed, gripping the bag of chips in her lap like it might ground her. “That's your problem Jackie. You think you know everything, don’t you?”
Jackie hummed, tilting her head slightly. “I know you.”
Shauna shook his head in disbelief. “That’s not an answer.”
Jackie smirked. “Isn’t it?”
Shauna exhaled sharply, looking away. She should change the subject, anything to stop Jackie from watching her like this, like she was seeing every thought Shauna didn’t want to say out loud.
“So, what?” Shauna asked, keeping her voice even. “You work here now, have a job, and suddenly think you’re deep?”
Jackie snorted. “Nah. But it is funny watching you squirm.”
Shauna’s whole body tensed. “I’m not—”
Jackie raised an eyebrow. Again.
Shauna groaned. “You’re so annoying.” She hates being so tense sometimes, she hates keeping everything inside her, she hates not having the strength to be herself without consequences. Her real version is too raw, who would like it?
Jackie grinned. “And yet, you’re still here.”
Shauna also hated how easily Jackie got under her skin. How she could twist every little moment into something — a game, a challenge, a slow unraveling of whatever control Shauna thought she had over herself.
Jackie knew that.
Maybe that’s why she suddenly leaned in, just slightly, her voice dropping a bit lower when she said, “Admit it.”
Shauna’s breath caught. “Admit what?”
Jackie smirked. “That you like coming here because of me. That you like me.”
Shauna’s throat went dry.
Jackie was too close now — close enough that Shauna could smell her perfume, something soft and of course expensive. Close enough that all she’d have to do was shift slightly, lean forward, and—
No.
Shauna forced herself to scoff, rolling her eyes. “God, your ego is unbelievable.”
Jackie didn’t move away.
She just tilted her head, eyes flickering over Shauna’s face — watching.
Then, with a smug little smile, she whispered, “You didn’t say no.”
Shauna’s stomach flipped.
She needed to get out of here.
Now.
Without another word, she grabbed her chips, pushed herself up from the couch, and walked out of the break room before she could do something stupid.
Before she could let Jackie see how red her face was.
Before she could admit — maybe even to herself —that Jackie was right.
She hadn’t said no.
—
Shauna didn’t go back to the store for three days.
She told herself it was because she was busy. Because she had study, because soccer practice ran late, because she just didn’t feel like it.
But she knew the truth.
She was hiding.
Hiding from the way Jackie had looked at her, from the words that still echoed in her head — You didn’t say no. Said as if they were kids on the playground again and Jackie was teasing her.
But on the fourth day, she caved. Of course she did.
The bell above the door jingled as she stepped inside, her stomach already twisting into knots.
Jackie was behind the counter, lazily flipping through a magazine.
She didn’t look up immediately. But when she did, her smirk was instant.
“Well, well,” Jackie drawled. “Thought you might’ve died.”
Shauna rolled her eyes, walking to the cooler just to avoid looking directly at her. “I was busy.”
Jackie hummed. “Uh-huh.”
Shauna grabbed an energy drink and walked up to the counter, trying to act normal. Casual. Like nothing had changed.
Jackie scanned the drink but didn’t say anything.
Didn’t push. Didn’t tease.
And somehow, that was worse.
The silence stretched between them, thick and heavy, until Shauna couldn’t take it anymore.
“I—” She exhaled sharply. “Are you mad at me or something?”
Jackie blinked, like the question actually surprised her. “Why would I be mad?”
Shauna shifted her weight. “I don’t know. Because I left the other day. Because I—”
She cut herself off, realizing she didn’t know how to finish that sentence.
Because she ran? Because she felt something?
Jackie just watched her for a moment, expression unreadable. Then, slowly, she leaned forward, resting her elbows on the counter.
“Do you want me to be mad?”
Shauna’s breath hitched. “What?”
Jackie’s voice was quieter now, more serious. “Would it be easier? If I got mad? If I acted like none of this mattered?”
Shauna’s pulse pounded.
None of this?
This.
Jackie was saying it out loud — was naming the thing Shauna had been avoiding, the thing that had been sitting between them, heavy and undeniable.
Shauna’s fingers curled around the drink can, knuckles white. “I don’t—”
Jackie sighed. “Shauna.”
And the way she said it — soft, steady, patient — made something inside Shauna snap.
Before she could stop herself, she went to her side of the cash register, grabbed Jackie’s wrist and muttered, “Break room. Now.”
Jackie seemed surprised but let herself be pulled.
The second they were inside, the door clicking shut behind them, Shauna let go of Jackie’s wrist and ran a hand through her hair, pacing slightly.
Jackie leaned against the wall, crossing her arms. “So…?”
Shauna exhaled sharply. “I don’t know what you want from me.”
She knew.
Jackie’s expression flickered — something almost hurt flashing across her face before she masked it. “I never asked for anything.”
Shauna turned to face her, frustration and something deeper bubbling up. “Then why are you always pushing me?”
Jackie held her gaze. “Because you want me to.”
Shauna’s heart stopped.
Then started again, racing.
Because Jackie was right.
She had been waiting for this. For Jackie to push, to force her to stop pretending, to stop hiding behind Jeff and normalcy and everything safe. She ran away from her because she was afraid she would destroy her normal self like she always did.
Her hands were shaking.
Jackie sighed and ran a hand through her hair, looking away. “Look, if this is some—”
But Shauna didn’t let her finish.
She stepped forward, grabbed Jackie’s neck, and kissed her.
It wasn’t soft. It wasn’t careful. It was messy, desperate — too much and not enough all at once.
Jackie froze for half a second, like she hadn’t actually expected Shauna to do it.
Then she melted.
She grabbed Shauna’s waist, pulling her closer, deepening the kiss like she’d been waiting for this just as much. Maybe she had.
Shauna’s hands fisted in Jackie’s neck, holding on like she was afraid to let go. And Jackie — Jackie smiled into the kiss, because of course she did.
Because she’d won.
Because she’d been right all along.
She knew Jackie, she knew she loved this feeling above all else.
Shauna pulled back slightly, breathing hard, forehead resting against Jackie’s.
Jackie’s smirk was lazy, pleased. “Took you long enough.”
Shauna huffed out a breath, half-laugh, half-exasperation. “Shut up.”
Jackie grinned. “Make me.”
So Shauna kissed her again.
—
Kissing Jackie was... easy.
It was everything else that was hard.
The second they pulled away, the second Shauna stepped back, reality slammed into her.
What had she just done?
Jackie was watching her, arms still looped around her waist, that smug little smirk still on her lips. “So,” she said, tilting her head. “Are you gonna run away again?”
Shauna’s face burned. “I wasn’t—” She huffed, stepping out of Jackie’s hold. “I’m not running.”
Jackie hummed, unconvinced.
Shauna crossed her arms. “I don't understand why you are like this.”
Jackie grinned. “And yet, you kissed me.”
Shauna groaned, pressing the heels of her hands to her eyes. “I hate you.”
Jackie just laughed. “No, you don’t.” Shauna hated that Jackie knew that too.
The next few days were… weird.
Not bad. Not awkward.
Just weird.
They didn’t talk about the kiss. Didn’t say what it meant. But something had shifted.
Shauna still went to the convenience store, still sat with Jackie on her breaks, still rolled her eyes when Jackie smirked at her.
But now, Jackie sat closer. Now, their knees brushed under the table, and neither of them moved away. Now, Jackie played with the hem of Shauna’s sleeve absentmindedly while they talked, like it was the most natural thing in the world.
And Shauna — Shauna let her.
Didn’t pull away. Didn’t make a joke to deflect.
She just let it happen. That terrified her more than anything.
One night, Shauna was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, when her phone buzzed.
Jackie: you up?
Shauna sighed, smiling a little.
Shauna: obviously.
Jackie: come over
Shauna frowned.
Shauna: it’s almost midnight
Jackie: and?
Shauna hesitated.
Before she could overthink it, before she could talk herself out of it, she grabbed her hoodie, slipped out the window, and started biking to Jackie’s house.
Jackie’s bedroom was the same as always — too clean, too perfect, smelling like expensive perfume.
Shauna, after the whole process of having to climb up to jackie's window, she stood awkwardly by the bed. “So. What’s so important it couldn’t wait until morning?”
Jackie sat on the edge of the bed, legs crossed, looking up at her with a slow, innocent eyes.
“I just wanted to see you.”
Shauna’s stomach flipped. She swallowed, trying to play it cool. “You see me every day.”
Jackie hummed, reaching out, fingers lightly hooking around Shauna’s wrist. “Yeah. But not like this.”
Shauna exhaled shakily, letting herself be pulled down onto the bed.
Jackie’s hands slid up, tracing slow patterns against Shauna’s arm. Not pushing, not teasing. Just touching.
Shauna stared at her, heart pounding. She could kiss her again. Right now. Nothing was stopping her.
Jackie must’ve seen the thought cross her face, because her lips curved up, barely-there, and she whispered, “You don’t have to be scared.”
Shauna clenched her jaw. “I’m not—”
Jackie raised an eyebrow. “Shauna.”
Shauna sighed, looking down. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
Jackie tilted her head. “Do you have to?”
Shauna looked at her.
Jackie’s eyes were soft, open in a way that made something ache in Shauna’s chest.
So she did the only thing that made sense.
She kissed her.
Slowly, this time.
Gently.
And Jackie kissed her back just as softly, just as slowly, like they had all the time in the world.
Because maybe they did.
Maybe this — whatever this was — didn’t need to be rushed.
Maybe, for once, Shauna could just let it happen. Don't overthink it. Just let it happen.
But if Shauna thinks... she had never been one to rush. Not in any part of her life. Not with boys. Not with her friends. Not with anything.
And here she was, in Jackie’s bedroom again, standing at the edge of something that felt too big for her to name.
Her heart was thudding in her chest as Jackie looked up at her from the bed, eyes soft but filled with something Shauna couldn’t quite grasp.
Jackie’s voice was quiet, but it cut through the tension like a knife. “You don’t have to do this if you’re not ready.”
Shauna swallowed hard, unsure of where to go with this. Everything in her wanted to move forward, wanted to be closer, but there was that lingering fear, that hesitation.
But Jackie wasn’t rushing her.
She was just waiting.
And Shauna felt something break inside her — the last of her walls, the last of her resistance. Her palace.
“I want to,” Shauna said, voice barely above a whisper.
Jackie smiled, the expression tender, genuine. She stood, slowly, and cupped Shauna’s face in her hands. “Are you sure?”
Shauna nodded, her hands trembling, but she reached out and touched Jackie’s arm, pulling her closer. She wanted this. She wanted Jackie.
And when their lips met this time, it wasn’t tentative — it was hungry, desperate, full of that unsaid thing that had been between them for so long.
Jackie’s hands were on Shauna’s hips, pulling her flush against her body. Shauna felt the heat radiating off Jackie’s skin, felt her heartbeat matching her own.
Her breath hitched when Jackie’s lips trailed down her neck, the soft pressure of her mouth sending shivers through Shauna’s entire body.
It was more than she’d expected. More than she thought she could handle. But she didn’t pull away. She let Jackie guide her, letting go of all the uncertainty, all the fear that had held her back for so long.
Shauna woke up the next morning, tangled in Jackie’s arms. She was still processing everything, her mind racing with thoughts. She had to stop this. Shit, let it happen.
Jackie’s steady breathing next to her calmed her, and Shauna let herself relax for a moment, savoring the feeling of being close to her.
She hadn’t expected it to feel like this.
It wasn’t just about the physical closeness — it was about something deeper, something she hadn’t even known she was looking for.
When Jackie shifted in her sleep, her hand brushing against Shauna’s skin, it felt so right. But the reality of their situation hit her quickly.
What would everyone think?
Shauna sat at the table in the cafeteria the next day, fiddling with her food as Jackie slid into the seat beside her. They hadn’t talked much about what had happened the night before. It was something natural. The way Jackie’s hand brushed against hers under the table was enough.
“Hey,” Jackie said quietly, leaning closer. “You good?”
Shauna looked up at her, meeting her gaze. The words were there, hanging between them.
“Yeah,” Shauna said, finally. “Just... I really like this.”
Jackie gave her a small smile. “About how much you like to overthink things?”
Shauna smirked back, trying to cover up the sudden burst of nerves that rose up. “You should talk. You’re just as bad.”
Jackie laughed softly, brushing her thumb over Shauna’s hand. The contact was casual, but the undercurrent of it was anything but.
Shauna glanced around, making sure no one else was paying attention. She didn’t want to bring any attention to them just yet.
And for the rest of the day, they played it cool. They didn’t flirt openly, didn’t make anything obvious. It was hard — Shauna had never been good at hiding things. But she’d learned how to blend in over the years, how to keep her feelings locked inside.
But then came the moment when the tension between them was too thick to ignore.
It was after practice, the team all milling about, getting their bags, ready to leave. Jackie and Shauna were walking together, but not too closely — still trying to keep things subtle.
Tai raised an eyebrow as she glanced at them. “You two got something going on?” she asked casually, smirking.
Shauna’s heart stopped.
Jackie didn’t flinch. Instead, she leaned in and whispered in Shauna’s ear, loud enough for the others to hear, “Maybe we do.”
Shauna froze, looking up at Jackie, completely unsure how to react. But the way Jackie’s eyes twinkled with that mischievous spark made Shauna’s heart race in a way she couldn’t ignore.
Van snorted. “Well, shit. Didn’t expect that.”
Shauna just stared at Jackie, feeling the heat rise to her cheeks. But when Jackie winked at her, she couldn’t help the little smile that tugged at her lips.
The team didn’t make a big deal out of it. Nat and some of the others just laughed it off, and things seemed to move forward without too much trouble.
But for Shauna, it felt like the weight had been lifted. She didn’t need to hide anymore. Jackie was by her side, and everything made sense again.