Chapter Text
The stars are starting to blink their eyes open outside when the girl looking back at you from the mirror sneers at the size of your massive belly and unkempt hair. She whispers cruel words, chides you about how unattractive you look, and sneers at how much work you do - she tells you even with all your effort it will never be enough and you believe her.
You will always be ugly, lazy, and unlovable.
Your reflection has a smug grin as you fall deeper into this pit of despair, giving her words value.
“Yin?” Shoto calls from the other side of the door. “Are you going to join us for dinner? We’re all waiting for you.”
“Go ahead and eat without me.” You respond, doubts circling your mind. “I’m not hungry.”
You’re sure he doesn’t want someone as monstrous as you in his life. Your hair looks like a nest, untamed and all over the place. Every time your eyes land on your thighs, you want to rip yourself out of your skin in the hopes of reconstructing someone worth noticing. Why did he notice you again?
Shoto jump scares you when his voice wafts through the door again.
“May I come in?”
“Go ahead.” You allow, turning from your disgusted reflection.
Shoto steps through the threshold as you cast another fleeting glance at the swollen figure in the mirror. Is this what he sees every day? He’s never said anything but kind things about you - he’s even admitted thinking you were the most beautiful girl in Class 1-A since the first day. But that can’t be true, can it? How does he stand it?
Do you and Shoto see someone completely different?
The calloused pads of his fingers graze your cheeks and drag you out of your mind. His gaze shines with adoration. How can he look at you and still be so in love, to smile at you without gagging in disgust at the body you’re trapped in?
“You’re doing it again, my love.” He presses a chaste kiss to your forehead. “Don’t starve yourself. At least have a little rice with us.”
You purse your lips and shrug.
“Not hungry.” You lie, but your rumbling tummy rats you out.
Traitor.
“Hey...” Shoto warns, pulling you against his chest. “Tell me what’s bothering you. Why don’t you feel like eating?”
His words burn you, threatening to scar your skin with guilt at how annoying you must be to keep him stranded here. Surely he could do better with someone like Momo at his side. Someone confident and secure in themselves.
“I’m not good enough.” You whisper. “I mean…look at me, Shoto. I’m a mess. My clothes are getting too tight, my face is a wreck - I don’t know why you put up with me half the time.” You hold your arm to the side and cast your eyes toward your feet.
Shoto considers his words carefully, so the silence following your comment shouldn’t scare you as much as it does. When his fingers come under your chin and force you to look at him, terror anchors your heart in a cold freeze.
“Your clothes are getting tight because you’ve been training and getting stronger, my flame. I can see your muscles under your shirt every time you flex. And I’ve told you many times that I’ve always thought you were the most beautiful girl at UA.” He says, before pulling you snug against his chest. Warmth blossoms against your neck as he buries his face there. “And aside from all that…I didn’t fall for you because of your body; I fell for you because of your heart. Because like the sun, it illuminates everything around you. You radiate beauty. That’s why I call you my flame.”
It’s not just the words that soothe your bleeding soul, but him .
Only Shoto can flood you with reassurance, with the confidence that you’re perfect for him and no one could take your place. Even at times like these, when you doubt it, he walks back in to ease your distress.
Normally, you might ask a confirming question - “Are you sure you want me?” - but today his praise slathers your old wounds like a balm. Every horrible word said about you in the past, every derogatory statement, every snide comment, it’s all smeared with the healing salve of his love for you.
Your insecurities don’t just disappear like magic, but they’re mending.
You are mending.
“Thanks, Shoto.” You breathe, squeezing him tight before sighing and pulling back. “Let’s go eat, then.”