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I had always known that my ending would never be a happy one.
I was not blessed with a good father, nor a good childhood, or even a half decent job.
A 'Dokja' like me would always be destined to suffer, it was my fate, a truth that I was content with. It did not matter to me. I had my stories with me to survive.
Even when fiction merged with reality, my only goal was to ensure that my companions would reach their epilogue and live happily beyond the scenarios.
I would live long enough to witness their conclusion and that would be the end of it.
Whether I got live out their 'ending' alongside them was not up to me.
✦
Watching my companions exit the subway with a fragmented version of myself was a bitter experience for me.
That fragment would get to experience everything I couldn't, would be able to live with my companions in my place.
I knew that I would never get to see Lee Gilyoung, Shin Yoosung and Biyoo grow up. I would never get to attend Lee Jihye's graduation. I would never get to read Han Sooyoung's novels...
They would move on with their lives with 'Kim Dokja', unaware that only a part of him had left the subway alongside them.
Was this how the Plotter felt, watching the 1864th regression turn live a life he could not have?
As the subway silently began to move once more, I continued to watch Yoo Joonghyuk and Han Sooyoung bicker with each other from beyond the tinted glass, before they disappeared from my view entirely.
[The percentage of memories you currently retain is '51%'.]
I smiled bitterly at the message in front of me. This truly was the only way.
Had they known, my companions would have certainly dragged me out of the subway by force or attempt to bear my burden instead.
I could not allow that.
[Currently, the 'Most Ancient Dream' is absent.]
[You have earned the qualifications to become the 'Most Ancient Dream'.]
[Will you continue to dream?]
If there was no ancient dream giving their gaze to the worldlines, they would remain frozen in that moment for eternity. No longer able to move forward into the world and onwards with their new lives away from the scenarios.
Deep down, I knew that I didn't really want this. A part of me had foolishly hoped, wanted an epilogue by their sides too.
I knew that such a fate would be too cruel to anyone, even myself, but after all that my companions had sacrificed, would it have been right to selfishly save only myself and not them?
No. I knew I couldn't let that happen.
「 Yo u are dece ivi ng you r comp anion s. 」
"I know."
「 Yo u wi ll hur t the m e ven mo re. 」
"I know. But there is no other alternative."
No one else can bear the probability of my modifier. It has to be me.
"Besides, my companions have my avatar with them. At the very least, they will still have a part of me left to experience their ending with."
It was not as if I didn't deserve such a fate.
A being as cruel as me, who used their suffering to extend my own lifespan like a constellation, could only be punished by a fate as cruel as eternity.
「 Ki m Dok ja thoug ht 'The re wa s no happ ily e ver afte r f or a mon ster lik e me. 」
I smiled wrily. My name seemed fitting now, knowing that my fate would remain as a lonely reader.
[Constellation 'Demon King of Salvation' has reached his ■■.]
I had accepted my fate. This was the only way for me to properly atone for my sins.
[Your ■■ is etẻ̸̪r̴̻̈́nit-]
[Ę̸͕͍͉͙̿̿́͘Ṛ̸̢̻̊̉̃̑̿̕͝Ŗ̸͇̮̻͍̩̳͎͍̜̰̪̄̎̆̍̎͆̈́̅̓̂̀͌̌O̵̢̡͎͓̲̒͊̍̏̒̿̒̆̀͜͠R̶̨̡̦͍̻̹̼̯̙̝̺̀̉͘̕!̷̢̠̮͇̼͖̺̹̹̄́̎̿̌̃̓͛̋̏͊͊̕̚ͅ ̸̨̖̻̻̙̰̲̯̐ẅ̶̗̙̳́Á̸̧͈͔̯̹͓̣͉͔͍̽̑͊̔̿̅͗͘͝r̶̨̘͖̮͔̮̲̥̺̦̙̆̽̇͗͋̌͛͋̓͂͘͜͠͝n̸̡̛̰̳̘̠̠̟͉̟̣̗̪̱͐̎̈́̀͛̋͑͜͠I̶̗̜̰͍̩̫͒̈́̀̿̈̈́͂̏͘͝N̶̛̛̞̖͉͈͆͑̑̍̾̓̈́̿̍̕͝͠͝ͅG̶̣̯͎̩̞̲͇͖̦̲̎̎́̄͗͠ͅ!]
An error message? I had never seen an error message like this before, even during the scenarios.
It happened all to quickly for me to register the sudden wave of something pulsing through my veins.
"Ugh-!" I held my head in my arms as a jolt of pain shot through my head, and the text in front of me began to shift and glitch.
Blearily, I opened my eyes and watched confused as the sentences corrupted further.
[Nebula Ō̸̫m̷̗̻͗̈n̴̨͈̎i̴̭̺̾̂ş̸͇̆̀c̵̨̲̐i̵̦̐ȩ̸̔̚n̶͚̋͝ť̸͍̓ ̸̘̆R̵͙̀̈e̶̥̋̂a̶͎̾d̶̛̳̟̉é̶͓r̶͍̤͐'̴̰͍́̚s̷̺̭͠ ̷̹͇̽͊V̸̛͍̂i̸̢͗e̷̥̍̐͜ẅ̷̯́̍p̵̨̒͝o̵̭͂͝ì̶̯͖̃n̶̗̊t̶̠͎̖̱̓ͅ is refusing to acknowledge constellation 'Demon King of Salvation's ■■!]
'A nebula? But that can't be right. A nebula shouldn't be able to exist outside of the star stream.'
Probability sparks began to form around me as multiple glitched panels shone through the darkness. The pain was steadily getting worse and it felt as if my nerves were on fire.
Just what in the world was happening?
[Nebula Ō̸̫m̷̗̻͗̈n̴̨͈̎i̴̭̺̾̂ş̸͇̆̀c̵̨̲̐i̵̦̐ȩ̸̔̚n̶͚̋͝ť̸͍̓ ̸̘̆R̵͙̀̈e̶̥̋̂a̶͎̾d̶̛̳̟̉é̶͓r̶͍̤͐'̴̰͍́̚s̷̺̭͠ ̷̹͇̽͊V̸̛͍̂i̸̢͗e̷̥̍̐͜ẅ̷̯́̍p̵̨̒͝o̵̭͂͝ì̶̯͖̃n̶̗̊t̶̓ͅ is refusing to acknowledge constellation 'Most Ancient Dream's ■■!]
[Nebula Ō̸̫m̷̗̻͗̈n̴̨͈̎i̴̭̺̾̂ş̸͇̆̀c̵̨̲̐i̵̦̐ȩ̸̔̚n̶͚̋͝ť̸͍̓ ̸̘̆R̵͙̀̈e̶̥̋̂a̶͎̾d̶̛̳̟̉é̶͓r̶͍̤͐'̴̰͍́̚s̷̺̭͠ ̷̹͇̽͊V̸̛͍̂i̸̢͗e̷̥̍̐͜ẅ̷̯́̍p̵̨̒͝o̵̭͂͝ì̶̯͖̃n̶̗̊t̶̓ͅ is refusing to acknowledge constellation ''̶͍͝M̶͈̚ọ̷͘s̴̬͛t̶̬͋ ̶̄͜A̵̯͑n̴̺̐c̸̖̍ȋ̶͕e̷̻̊n̶͖̒ț̸͆ ̵̜͐D̴̰̚ṛ̶͠é̸̹a̸̯̚m̶̛̞'̴͓̀s̵̠̕ ■■!]
[Nebula Ō̸̫m̷̗̻͗̈n̴̨͈̎i̴̭̺̾̂ş̸͇̆̀c̵̨̲̐i̵̦̐ȩ̸̔̚n̶͚̋͝ť̸͍̓ ̸̘̆R̵͙̀̈e̶̥̋̂a̶͎̾d̶̛̳̟̉é̶͓r̶͍̤͐'̴̰͍́̚s̷̺̭͠ ̷̹͇̽͊V̸̛͍̂i̸̢͗e̷̥̍̐͜ẅ̷̯́̍p̵̨̒͝o̵̭͂͝ì̶̯͖̃n̶̗̊t̶̓ͅ is rë̶̢́f̷̫̌ū̶̙ș̵̽i̷̞̕n̸̬̕g̷̲͋ ̷̻͊t̶̯͑o̶͔̊ ̸͖͛ã̴̯c̷̕͜k̶̟̓n̵̠̍o̸̹̒w̴̗͂l̷͉͠e̶̻̓d̴̘̒g̶̦̈́ë̶͍́ ̷͔͗c̷̟̀o̵̲̒ṅ̸͈s̷͍͊t̷͎͊ë̴̯ḻ̴̅l̶͈͌a̵͎͂t̵̤̓ĭ̵̥ó̸̤n̴͈͒ ̴̝́'̷̣̐M̷̛̩ö̴̺́s̷̛̤t̶̗̊ ̷̜͌A̴̝͌n̷̪͋c̶͌͜ȉ̴̪e̴̯͌n̴͕̍t̷͙͐ ̶͎̌D̶̰̓r̶̙͒ë̷͈́â̴͓m̵̛̪'̵̬͝ș̸̄ ■■!]
[Your ■■ is e̶͉͐ţ̶̐■̸̮͠■̸͔͗n̷̲̓#̸͍͂*̷̒ͅ@̴͖̈́(̵̬́*̵̩̌#̸̨̿s̴͈̚■̷̨̊■̴̥͊v̴͚̊a̵̜̓t̴͇͊i̸͖̿o̵̧͋■̶̫̱͈̏]
[Ę̸͕͍͉͙̿̿́͘Ṛ̸̢̻̊̉̃̑̿̕͝Ŗ̸͇̮̻͍̩̳͎͍̜̰̪̄̎̆̍̎͆̈́̅̓̂̀͌̌O̵̢̡͎͓̲̒͊̍̏̒̿̒̆̀͜͠R̶̨̡̦͍̻̹̼̯̙̝̺̀̉͘̕!̷̢̠̮͇̼͖̺̹̹̄́̎̿̌̃̓͛̋̏͊͊̕̚ͅ ̸̨̖̻̻̙̰̲̯̐ẅ̶̗̙̳́Á̸̧͈͔̯̹͓̣͉͔͍̽̑͊̔̿̅͗͘͝r̶̨̘͖̮͔̮̲̥̺̦̙̆̽̇͗͋̌͛͋̓͂͘͜͠͝n̸̡̛̰̳̘̠̠̟͉̟̣̗̪̱͐̎̈́̀͛̋͑͜͠I̶̗̜̰͍̩̫͒̈́̀̿̈̈́͂̏͘͝N̶̛̛̞̖͉͈͆͑̑̍̾̓̈́̿̍̕͝͠͝ͅG̶̣̯͎̩̞̲͇͖̦̲̎̎́̄͗͠ͅ!]
I cried out as yet another wave of pain hit me. My eyes were blurred with unshed tears and all I could hear was a high pitched ringing sound.
Rather abruptly, the burning pain suddenly stopped and the panels around me began to slowly stabilize.
The probability sparks surrounding me subsided, although my head was still pounding from the sudden migraine.
Something had gone terribly wrong.
[Nebula Ō̸̫m̷̗̻͗̈n̴̨͈̎i̴̭̺̾̂ş̸͇̆̀c̵̨̲̐i̵̦̐ȩ̸̔̚n̶͚̋͝ť̸͍̓ ̸̘̆R̵͙̀̈e̶̥̋̂a̶͎̾d̶̛̳̟̉é̶͓r̶͍̤͐'̴̰͍́̚s̷̺̭͠ ̷̹͇̽͊V̸̛͍̂i̸̢͗e̷̥̍̐͜ẅ̷̯́̍p̵̨̒͝o̵̭͂͝ì̶̯͖̃n̶̗̊t̶̓ͅ has used the exclusive skill 'overwrite'.]
[Several ??? lvl constellations are attempting to descend!]
[The 'Sanctum of the Most Ancient Dream' is destabilizing!]
A horrified expression was plastered on my face. This situation was too bizarre to be real.
"This shouldn't be possible! Nothing can enter this place without the fragment of the final wall!" I exclaimed.
The subway swayed from side to side as if there was an earthquake affecting it.
[The 'Most Ancient Dream' is denying Nebula Ō̸̫m̷̗̻͗̈n̴̨͈̎i̴̭̺̾̂ş̸͇̆̀c̵̨̲̐i̵̦̐ȩ̸̔̚n̶͚̋͝ť̸͍̓ ̸̘̆R̵͙̀̈e̶̥̋̂a̶͎̾d̶̛̳̟̉é̶͓r̶͍̤͐'̴̰͍́̚s̷̺̭͠ ̷̹͇̽͊V̸̛͍̂i̸̢͗e̷̥̍̐͜ẅ̷̯́̍p̵̨̒͝o̵̭͂͝ì̶̯͖̃n̶̗̊t̶̓'s existence!]
「 Ki m Dok ja som ethin g is wron g- 」
[Exclusive skill 'Fourth wall' is thinning rapidly!]
Nonononono this wasn't happening this wasn't happening this wasn't happening this wasn't happening this wasn't happening this wasn't happening this wasn't happening-
All of a sudden, a cacophony of voices cut through my thoughts like a sharp blade.
[[Stop this nonsense Kim Dokja.]]
What...? This voice, I couldn't recognize it. Who was this-?
[[Wake up little star. It's time to come back to reality.]]
Nonono this wasn't real. Was he dreaming again?
[[Oh Most Ancient Dream, you cannot deny our existence no matter how much you try to. We will continue to exist even without your acknowledgement.]]
[Nebula Ō̸̫m̷̗̻͗̈n̴̨͈̎i̴̭̺̾̂ş̸͇̆̀c̵̨̲̐i̵̦̐ȩ̸̔̚n̶͚̋͝ť̸͍̓ ̸̘̆R̵͙̀̈e̶̥̋̂a̶͎̾d̶̛̳̟̉é̶͓r̶͍̤͐'̴̰͍́̚s̷̺̭͠ ̷̹͇̽͊V̸̛͍̂i̸̢͗e̷̥̍̐͜ẅ̷̯́̍p̵̨̒͝o̵̭͂͝ì̶̯͖̃n̶̗̊t̶̓ͅ is forcefully incarnating into the worldline!]
[Nebula Ō̸̫m̷̗̻͗̈n̴̨͈̎i̴̭̺̾̂ş̸͇̆̀c̵̨̲̐i̵̦̐ȩ̸̔̚n̶͚̋͝ť̸͍̓ ̸̘̆R̵͙̀̈e̶̥̋̂a̶͎̾d̶̛̳̟̉é̶͓r̶͍̤͐'̴̰͍́̚s̷̺̭͠ ̷̹͇̽͊V̸̛͍̂i̸̢͗e̷̥̍̐͜ẅ̷̯́̍p̵̨̒͝o̵̭͂͝ì̶̯͖̃n̶̗̊t̶̓ͅ has strengthened the 'Fourth Wall'.]
[Exclusive skill 'Fourth Wall' is solidifying!]
[Exclusive skill 'Fourth Wall' has offset some of your mental shock.]
My senses that had started to blur were sharpened, and I was quickly yanked out of my rapidly spiraling thoughts by the unknown entity.
「 Ki m Dok ja is o k? 」
I reassured the fourth wall that I was fine- at least as fine as I can be when faced with something powerful enough to override my own will.
There was no physical incarnation near me at the moment, I would have known if there was, yet I could still sense their presence surrounding me.
Oddly enough I did not find it to be oppressive. Rather, their omnipresence felt like a warm blanket had wrapped itself around me, comforting me.
It was frightening, to feel so loved by someone I didn't know.
"Who are you? Better yet, what are you?" I asked the darkness surrounding me.
[[... this is a conversation best done face to face.]]
???
Another ding rang out from the shadows as a familiar blue tinted panel appeared in front of me.
[F̸̘̗̘̏̇̾͘ř̴̻̪̦͕̪͠a̵͚͉̍̒͆̈́͜ġ̷̡͖͉̘̹̭͘m̶̥̖͇̏̀̒͠͠ḙ̶͓̾̚ǹ̷̞̅́t̸̢͓͆ ̵̗̋2̴̧͖̫̣́͆,0̶̢̰͍̼̩́̈9̴̡̭̠̰̺̲̋̃͛̃͂4̶̖͕̠̒̇̾̃͜,̷̠̎̌͗͌̀̃1̸̪̯̯͐9̷̜͈̩̺͐̽0̷͎͖̒̐̕͜͠ Constellation 'Keeper of the Abyssal Veil' has incarnated into the ???]
More out of instinct than genuine fear, I flinched at the sight of probability sparks appearing before me once more.
Despite the fourth wall's best efforts, the phantom pain of my previous experience still lingered, thrumming beneath my skin.
I watched partly out of morbid curiosity as slowly, a body began to materialize in front of me.
The person standing there appeared to be a male with the exact same build and height as me, with even some similar facial features aside from the blue eyes and blue highlights.
Their eyes were scarily blank as they bore into my own. It should have been unnerving to see what was in essence, a stranger wearing my face and staring back at me.
Although, perhaps after seeing the younger most ancient dream sitting in this very subway, I wasn't too surprised.
[[You must have many questions little star.]]
"I do, but before I continue you should probably answer the questions I asked first."
The being in front of me smirked, [[To put it simply, we are the fragments of 'Kim Dokja'.]]
I blinked in surprise, "That's not possible. I've only made one avatar and he has already left the subway."
[[Ah, but we never said we were from this timeline did we?]]
From this timeline? ...oh, I understood now.
"You're the fragments I created in the future? But that doesn't make sense, why would I fragment my soul like that? Did something happen to the 49% avatar?"
[[Your companions are quite greedy you know? They wanted to take you out of the subway and complete your soul again, removing the most ancient dream once more. As a result, you split yourself into millions of pieces and scattered yourself across thousands of worldlines.]]
[[This way, there would always be a most ancient dream keeping the worldline alive.]]
I hummed lowly. "That does seem like something I would do. But, if all that is true, then why have you come to me now?"
There was something sad in the being's eyes at my question, a story that spoke of an infinite love and sorrow for someone special (he did not want to think it was for him, he did not deserve such an expression).
[[We were not aware of your existence before little star, and if we had known we would've gotten you out of here sooner. Your friend Han Sooyoung is probably the most persistent out of your companions you see. She created a novel containing your story and spread it across all our worldlines, pleading for our help.]]
[[We could not regain our memories until we banded together and <merged> into larger parts of your souls, becoming constellations and travelling to this worldline, waiting for you.]]
"...why?"
The entity paused and turned to me, eyebrows furrowed.
[[Hmm? Why what?]]]
Without noticing, tears began to well up within my eyes and stream down my cheeks.
"Why... would you go this far? <Merging> and becoming a constellation is permanent, you've lost the lives you lived in your own worldlines. So why?"
My eyes had closed by this point, too overwhelmed by all that was happening. I did not deserve this and I knew it. This love, this devotion, it wasn't for someone like me, someone who was responsible for the suffering of thousands and the deaths of millions more.
Suddenly, I felt a warm embrace around me, pulling me close.
A hug. This mix of my fragmented souls was hugging me, as if I was something to be cherished.
Their head was resting on my shoulder, and I could almost feel the soft yet sad smile forming on their face.
[[We are not you anymore Kim Dokja. The pain and suffering that you endured is not ours to claim. We do not hate you, because we are not Kim Dokja anymore. Instead, we are the creations you made to give us a happier fate away from this subway.]]
The being pulled away and looked into my eyes with an expression so gentle it made my heart hurt.
[[Do you understand Kim Dokja? You are the reason why so many of us got to live out our dreams, to reach our very own 'endings'.]]
[[Not all of us were blessed with perfect lives, but we were still given the opportunity to live as fragments rather than suffer for eternity. We love you as our creator, for the salvation you had given and for the lives you made for us.]]
[[Of course, although we aren't 'Kim Dokja' anymore, we were still once parts of you. And no Kim Dokja can go on without paying their debts.]]
As the being spoke, a story materialized before me. It was a story I had never seen before, yet was oh so familiar to me.
[Giant Story 'The Sacrifice of A Reader' is begging to tell its story!]
[[This isn't a burden you need to bear on your own Kim Dokja.]]
Another smile, though this one was more determined than before.
[[We have read your story and wish to see you reach your happy ending as well. After all, isn't it natural for a reader to love and support their protagonist?]]
'No- stop. Please, don't say things like that.'
I wanted to speak, to protest that this was my punishment to endure alone, but the words wouldn't come out.
I think I too knew that this was an ending I wished to see.
[[Live on Kim Dokja. Live for your children, your companions, and your faithful readers. The genre of your life isn't tragedy anymore but hope.]]
The voice's distortion began to grow, as if multiple people were speaking instead of one.
All at once, several dings rang out beside my ear, and I turned my head to read the hundreds of notifications popping up one after the other.
[The ??? 'Keeper of the Abyssal Veil' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[The ??? 'Silent Witness of the Wandering Book' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[The ??? 'Alternator of False Reality' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[The ??? 'Enchanting Flame With A Silver Tongue' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[The ??? 'Entropy's Enemy' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[The ??? 'Witch of a Thousand Worlds' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[The ??? 'Maintainer of the Endless Library' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[The ??? 'Bibliophile with an Enchanted Veil' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[The ??? 'Monarch of the Celestial Light' has agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
[Several myth grade ??? have agreed to share the burden of the 'Most Ancient Dream'!]
My vision was once again blurred by unshed tears. Perhaps this was another one of my fantasies, and perhaps I would wake up hours later still trapped within the subway.
Yet... that small part of me began to hope once more, that I would be the one to receive salvation this time.
[[It's time to go home Kim Dokja.]]
Yes, for once in my life, I allowed myself to wish for an ending I did not deserve.
[The 'Most Ancient Dream' is crying out and wants to end!]
"My companions... I miss them. I want to go home."
The distortion grew once more, [[If that is the wish of 'Kim Dokja', then that is our wish too.]]
[The ??? 'Keeper of the Abyssal Veil' has granted the wish of the 'Most Ancient Dream''.]
✦
[Due to excessive fragmentation, the modifier 'Most Ancient Dream' is destabilizing!]
[The 'Most Ancient Dream' has ended.]
[Your modifier is the 'Final Fragment of a Star'.]