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Anything but Eggs

Summary:

Happy Easter! Gabe hide the Easter eggs for their kids, and he hid them a little too well. So Sam has to call for back up.

Married AU

Notes:

I know this is a day early but I wrote it this morning and wanted to make sure it was out in time for Easter. I hope you guys enjoy!

Work Text:

Easter Fic

 

 

Sam opened the fridge and frowned. Where the hell? He started shuffling everything around and still came up empty. He knew they’d put them right here last night. Gabe walked into the kitchen whistling. Sam shut the fridge and turned to him but didn’t get a chance to say anything before Gabe reached up and grabbed his neck and pulled him down for a kiss. Sam leaned into it for a half a second before he pulled back.

“Why the long face Daddy?” Gabe asked grinning and Sam sighed.

“I told you not to call me that unless the kids are around right? Stop trying to make it pervy.”

Gabe laughed and rubbed his back as he walked past him to grab his favorite moose coffee mug off the counter. “Sorry babe.”

“You’re not even a little sorry.”

“Guilty. So why were you staring into the fridge like it asked you a sphynx riddle?”

Sam opened the fridge again and gestured to it. “Where are the eggs?”

“The eggs?” Gabe asked picking up the coffee pot and pouring in only half, like he usually did before grabbing the sugar container and dumping more than enough to explain the 2 cavities he currently had. He reached past Sam and took the half and half out to add it to his “coffee”.

“Yes Gabe. The eggs. The kids’ll be up soon. We have to get this done already.”  

Gabe took a sip of his coffee and sighed contentedly before he winked at Sam. “Already taken care of.”

“Oh Gabe you DIDN’T.”

“I did. I did it last night so you could sleep in. Happy Easter!” Gabe started toward him, probably expecting another kiss, but Sam pushed past him and strode into the living room and looked around, looking at each and every surface. Nothing. Of course. He went to the front door and swung it open walking onto the porch and scanning the yard. Again, nothing. Dammit. He walked further into the yard and looked up, sure enough he saw a purple blob in his rain gutter above the garage. He got on his tip toe and plucked it out and held it in his hand as Gabe came outside.

“We talked about this!” Sam said exasperated and Gabe just looked at him like he didn’t know what he was talking about.

“What? I hid the eggs.”

Sam gestured to the gutter. “Our 3 year old is supposed to find that?”

“Well maybe not, but Charlie would have. She thinks outside of the box, unlike her Daddy.” Gabe said sipping his coffee and Sam resisted the urge to scream. Instead he took the egg in his hand and dropped it into Gabe’s coffee mug, satisfied when it plopped in and spilled over the sides.

“Hey!”

Sam ignored his husband and started looking around the yard again. He looked for 5 minutes with Gabriel following him. He finally turned on him again.

“Get the eggs and give them to me so I can hide them right before the kids get up.”

Gabriel sighed before he put his cup on the porch and grumbled. 10 minutes later and Sam had 5 eggs in his hands. One from under the couch cushions, wouldn’t that have been nice to sit on? One from the tailpipe of the car, fucking seriously? One in the sandbox buried in a sandcastle, come on! One in the bottom of the toy chest, and one in the closet underneath the blankets.

Gabriel stopped moving around and sat down on the couch sighing. “I’m tired.”

“You don’t get to be tired. Get me the rest of the eggs Gabe.”  

Gabe rubbed his neck and looked away guiltily.

“What?”

“I, uh, don’t remember where they are.”

“You don’t- Gabe! You only gave me 6. 6! We made 24!”

“I did it last night! It was late!”

Sam dropped the eggs into a bowl and rubbed his eyes. He was exhausted already. He snatched his phone off the table and pointed at Gabe.

“Go get the plastic eggs from the bedroom and bring them directly to me. And the candy, do. Not. Eat. Any. Of. It. You can fill the eggs while I fix this.”

Gabe mimicked him the whole way up the stairs. Sam just sighed and hit speed dial and waited.

“What?” A grumpy Dean answered after 4 rings and Sam pulled back to look at his phone. No, he’d dialed right.

“Dean give me Cas.”

“No. Cas is busy. Call back in like 20 minutes.” There was a muffled voice, probably Cas then Dean laughed. “Sorry. 45 minutes.”

“Dean wait! This is important.”

Dean sighed long and annoyed. “Fine. What?”

“Tell Cas that his idiot brother hid the kids eggs and I have no idea where they are. I need his help to find them.”

“Why Cas?”

“Gabe is HIS brother. He’s spent decades of Easters with him.”

 “Why do you need to find the eggs? Just make new ones. I know you have extra. We bought them together.”

“He hid the real eggs Dean. If we don’t find them they’re going to rot in my house. Do you want rotting eggs to be the first thing you smell when you walk in here?”

Sam heard Cas start talking and Dean moved the phone away as they talked for a minute before he came back on. “So should I expect your husband to ruin EVERY holiday for me or?”

“He was trying to help Dean. He’s just…he gets carried away.”

Dean sighed again. “You’re lucky we’re all up so damn early to fix this shit. And you better make sure that you have Cas back before MY kids wake up.”

“Thanks Dean. I really appreciate this. Tell Cas I’ll see him soon and I’ll see you for dinner.”

“Yeah, yeah, just tell Gabe that he fucking OWES us. And don’t forget to bring the shit for the sides.”

“Yeah. Bye.”

Gabe came back downstairs, his hands full of bags of candy and plastic eggs and baskets and dropped them on the table in front of Sam. Sam pushed the already made baskets to the side and ripped open the bag of eggs.

“Cas is coming to help us, Dean says he’s going to kill you btw.”

Gabe grinned, “Did we interrupt sexy time?”

“Yeah. And after the shit we pulled on Valentine’s day I think he may very well murder the both of us on the spot tonight.”

“He’ll get over it. He loves you.”

Sam grunted and popped open all the eggs then ripped the bag of candy. “Alright, I’ll make these and hide them just in case we don’t find them in time for the kids. You keep looking for the eggs.”

Gabe stood up but didn’t move. He just stood there fidgeting until Sam looked up.

“I…I’m sorry Baby. I was trying to help.”

Sam nodded and kept filling the eggs. “I know, it’s okay. Just maybe next time we don’t hide the eggs like they’re made of gold?”

“Right!”

“Alright. Next time.”

Gabe leaned over the side of the chair. “You still love me?”

“Yes. I still love you, you pain in the ass.”

“Ouch. You couldn’t say, ‘Why yes love of my life. I forgive you and you’re sexy and wonderful and you can make it up to me tonight.’ Huh? Would that have killed you?”

Sam laughed and turned his face toward Gabe and cupped his cheek and kissed him. “Oh you will be making this up to me. And Dean. And Cas.”

Gabe made a face. “I don’t want to make it up to your brother! Incest! And my brother? Double incest!”

Sam pushed Gabe’s face smiling. “Get your mind out of the gutter and get to work.”

Gabe leaned in and kissed Sam’s cheek again and squeezed his shoulder before he walked off.

15 minutes later and Gabe was on all fours reaching behind the TV as Cas and Claire walked through the door.

“I brought back up.”

“Oh thank god. That one,” Sam said throwing a thumb over his shoulder, “Has only found 1 egg since I called you. And he still can’t reach it.”

Claire walked over to the TV and bent down on the other side and pulled the egg out and held it up. “Can’t reach this?”

“Smart ass.” Gabe said sitting up.

“My dad said you’re offering a reward for each egg I find. So what’re we talking?”

Gabe held a hand to his heart. “You don’t want to help your uncle out of the kindness of your heart?”

“It’s 6:30 in the morning and I’m awake. On a Sunday. On a holiday. Do you think I have any kindness to offer right now?”

“Rude.”

Sam shook his head. “We’re pretty much screwed and she knows it Gabe. Might as well hurry up and make a deal with her.”

“Fine. What do you want?”

“10 bucks an egg.”

Gabe’s jaw nearly hit the floor. “10 bucks? Yeah. I don’t think so. How about 1?”

“7.”

“3. And you should be grateful for it!”

“5 or I can walk right back home.”

Gabe grumbled and threw a panicked look at Sam. Sam just shrugged because what else could he say? Claire had learned the art of manipulation for Gabe in the first place.

“Fine. 5. I don’t know how you’ll be able to sleep tonight.”

Claire stood up and tossed the egg in her hand up. “Pretty well considering I got up so damn early.”

“Claire.” Cas chastised. She nodded and dropped the egg she was holding in Sam’s hand.

“5 bucks and counting.”

Gabe stood up and shook his head. “That doesn’t count. I found it!”

“But I grabbed it. Didn’t you always say possession was 9/10ths of the law?”                    

Cas laughed, “I suggest you hurry up and find the eggs before she does, she’s out for blood.”

Claire and Gabe looked at each other for a long moment and both bolted out of the front door at the same time. Sam just shook his head as Cas smiled. He patted Sam’s shoulder in sympathy.

“If it makes you feel any better, Claire got me too. She gets to take Baby out next Saturday with Alex and Ben. Don’t tell Dean yet, okay?”

“That your daughter is going on a date or that she’s taking his car to do it?”  

Cas wrinkled his nose. “It’s not a date. Alex is going to be there too.”

“Uh huh.” Sam had his doubts. He’d seen how Claire and Ben had been acting with each other lately. They’d been friends first, that was true. But he’d bet money that it was turning into more. And in fact he had bet money on it. He and Gabe had a bet on whether Claire would tell her dads before or after she went to college. Sam was betting on before. A lot could happen between now and September. Gabe seems to think she can keep a secret better than that. He’d professed to teaching her, “his ways”. Either way, they were both in agreement that she and Ben were a couple, or would be soon enough.

“Alright, let’s find these eggs before Dean has a fit.” Cas said and stalked off toward the kitchen.

An hour later and they had found 23 of the eggs. With Claire finding a good majority of them at 10 eggs. Cas had found 5 and Gabe, the idiot who hid them had still only been able to find 2. ‘But I found 6 before that!’ Was his current attempt at redemption.

“Alright! Good enough! You can leave now, beautiful niece and extortionist. We can take it from here.”

“Uh. No. We have about 30 minutes before the kids come running down the stairs so it’s crunch time. I’m not going to have one egg just dying in my house. I’m upping the stakes. Find that last egg. If Claire finds it $15 bucks.”

“For ONE egg?” Gabe asked and Sam held up his hand.

“Shhhh. We don’t have time. You don’t want to pay her? Then you find it.”

Gabe pouted. “And what do I get it I find it?”

“You get to not sleep on the couch. How about that? Now hurry up.” Sam pushed Gabe to get him moving. He finally did begrudgingly and he and Claire went off. Sam had already set out the plastic eggs all around the living room and kitchen, in very obvious places, some on the steps, and a few on the porch. He’d re “hide” the real eggs once they found them all. Outside. In the yard. In the open. With an exact location of every single egg so he didn’t have to do this again.

Cas walked back into the living room and cleared his throat. Sam glanced at him as he grinned and held up the last missing egg.

“Aw man!” Claire complained and Gabe nodded.

“Well at least Claire didn’t find it.”

Claire crossed her arms. “Yea? Well you still owe me $50 bucks. So pay up.”

Gabe looked down at his PJ pants and patted his pockets in mock sympathy. “Sorry. No cash.”

“I accept Checks.”

“You’re joking.” Gabe said and Claire laughed.

“Of course I am.” She stopped smiling and held her hand out. “I don’t take checks. Money. Please.” She amended when she saw Cas watching her. Gabe grumbled all the way up the stairs and back down again, making so much noise Sam was surprised the kids weren’t awake already. He opened his wallet and thumbed out a few bills and slammed them into Claire’s outstretched palm.

“There! Hope you choke on it.”

“Gabe!” Sam yelled and Gabe winced.

“Or something less mean for an uncle to say.”

Claire shrugged and stuffed the money into her pocket. “Happy Easter.” She smiled and hugged Sam. Cas walked up to Gabe and patted his shoulder.

“She knows you still love her and appreciate that she came to help.”

“Yeah yeah.”

Cas snatched Gabe’s wallet from his fingers and took out the remaining cash before dropping the empty thing back into his hands. “And I appreciate the lunch money, thanks.”

“What the-”

Cas grinned and shoved his money into his own pocket. “I found 5 eggs, $25 bucks, plus the $15 last egg. $40 bucks.”

“There was a $50 in there!”

“Sorry. No change.” Cas held up his hands as his phone started ringing. He glanced at it and smiled again. “Dean’s calling. My kids are probably up. I’ll see you at dinner. You’re welcome.” He slid his finger across the screen to answer. “Hey babe. We’re on our way home now.” Cas and Claire left and shut the door quietly behind them.

Gabe looked down at his empty wallet then up at Sam. “I was just robbed.”

“Just be grateful we got it all taken care of. I’m going to hide these outside. You can start breakfast.” Sam said picking up the bowl of eggs. He started past but Gabe grabbed his arm and slid his hand into Sam’s hair and pulled him down for a kiss. He held him there for a while, kissing him gently, nipping at his lips, then sucked Sam’s tongue into his mouth. He savored it for a second before he pulled back.

“No time. Just go make breakfast.”

“Fine. What do you want?”

Sam grinned, “Anything but eggs.”

 

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