Chapter Text
He was cold, he was tired-so fucking tired, but finally he was home. Gerry was 13, he had a horrible day but it was fine, it would be fine. He walked slugishly into pinholes books and imdiantly something was qrong. He could hear sobs.
'Shit' he mutters.
He clambers up the stairs panicked and worried. He could smell the mettalic stench of blood coming from mum's office so she was busy, this was just remnents then. Good. He gathers himself and squishes his nervs. Walking into the mess of a room, he sees the cause.
Gerry was only 6 years old, he was wide eyed and bushy tailed. Him and mum walked together, the birds sung and the sun shined in the cold autmn day, it was a good day. She told him they were picking up a package from a friend. Gerry didnt like mum's friends they were mean and nasty and unhuman. One time one had left him all alone in a library, he didnt think he'd ever get out. Mum was so mad when she found him, said he was weak. She's still friends with that man but mum doesnt leave him with him anymore.
When they get to the house they dont stop to knock. Mum picks the lock and they enter quietly. Mum wass being quieter then usual ,usually shes a tornado of conflict but today shes stealthy. They walk into a quiet snug and see a women asleep with a baby on her chest.
Mum's smile sharpens in the same way it does when she has a scary idea.
Mum walks over to them and Gerry feels a spike of fear in his little heart "mum what if we wake them?" He asks. "Shh Gerard" she hisses back, ignoreing his question. Mum picks up the baby and gestures Gerry over. "Take her outside and sit on the steps" she whispers. Gerry looks at her confused but when he sees the flame of anger spark in her eyes he buldozes his confusion and nods. He gently takes the baby, she felt so delicate and heavy. He didnt want to break her.
Gerry leaves the room and hears the door lock behind him. He hears shouts that are not his mums. He didnt like this, he was scared and upset but the baby was starting to wake and didnt seem happy either. Gerry keeps walking to the door and makes it out to the freash air.
He sits on the cold steps for what felt like ages, the baby had started to cry and was shivering so Gerry had given her his jacket but now he was really cold. He tried to hum her a song he faintly remebered but the shivers and fear shoke his voice.
Then mum came out.
"Come on Gerard we're going home" mum says. "But the baby... her mum?" Gerry says quietly. Mum cackles back sharply but she seems to quiet that reaction. She kneels down infront of him with a deceitful kindness, it offered care and kindness that he'd eventually see through. "This is Freya, she's your knew little sister. Her mum was a very mean person so we rescued her and now she's safe. We're her family now. Do you understand Gerard." She says carefully. Gerry nods, care and protection instantly blooming for the little girl. "You'll be a good big brother and son then?" Mary asks. Gerry nods again "the best, I promise" he says with a proud demeanor. Mary nods with a smile "good".
As they walk in the cold of london Gerry doesnt ask why mum's hands were red stained or why he was carrying Freya when she was so heavy for his little arms.
Freya sat on her bed in tears. Her hair was matted and Gerry could see a balck eye blooming, damn it. "Frey what happend" he asks as he sits down next to her. Freya jumps onto him sobbing harder as she hugs him tigh5. The motion left Gerry frozen a punch paused before completed. "Mum hit me, sh-she got mad at my hair" she cries. Gerry's body relaxes now assured of the absense of danger. His arms come to rest around Freya in a hug.
"I told you to stay in our room... You know how mum gets..." he says quietly. Freya nods, a whimper leaving her throat. "Will you do my hair" she asks after her sobs fade. Gerry smiles softly "course".
Gerry liked doing Freyas hair it was soft and long. Her hair was very frizzy and curly, something he attributed to her skin tone. Her hair was different to his own and would knot very easily, usually he brushed matts out a couple times a week.
Gerry speant around an hour dematting her hair then tied it into piggy tails. Freya loved the hairstyle, it was like she had bobbles on her had.
"Where were you all day," Freya asks Gerry as he sits on his own bed. "Just running some erenads for mum" he replies. Usually Freya would go with him but this time mum wanted him to steal something so he thought it would be safer she stay home. "Gerry?" She starts. "Hmm?" "Why arent we in school" she asks. Gerry knew the answer, he knew it was the monsters and the books he also knew it was because mum had a temper and alot of people didnt think her temper was good. But saying all that would upset Freya and bring questions about her real mum. "Schools dont teach the things that mum wants us to know, like the books and stuff. If we didnt know that stuff we would be gobbled up by the world." He says. It was as much a lie as when he told himself the same things. That she cared and did this for their better good.
Freya doesnt ask anymore questions. Gerry lets the fatigue in his bones pull him into bed. "Wake me when your hungry" he says, just as his eyes begin to droop.
And then he's asleep.
It had been a year since Freya had joined them, Gerry liked her. She cried alot but she also gave him cuddles when mum was mad and played with gerry, now at least. Mum usually left gerry to look after her, it was his job as a big brother. Gerry didnt mind though, he minded more when mum wouldnt leave them alone. It meant when freya cried or got sick or needed changing or anything gerry was pretty sure all babys did, mum would get angry.
One time she had hit freya and freya had been so upset. Gerry from then on put himself in the way. If freya was crying gerry would curse, if freya got sick gerry would break something. It meant he got the punishment but at least freya was ok. Like today.
She had broken a glass. It was gerry's fault they couldnt find a plastic cup so he gave her a glass one and was helping her drink from it while he did his school work but he got distracted and well...crash.
Freya immdiantly started to cry and say she was sorry as Gerrys panic started to spill over. "Just go to our room ok" he says pushing her gently to the corridor before panicking and rushing to clean the mess. Tears in his eyes and breath uneven as mum came into the room.
He hadnt heard her and was still cleaning the water, little bits of glass getting stuck in his hands. "GERARD!" She yelled. Gerry shot up, his self control failed him as apologies fell from his lips accompanied by tears falling from his eyes. She hit him hard across the face, so hard he stumbled back and fell to the floor. She yelled that he was a useless brat. Her fury faded and she told him to stand then walked to the kitchen. He followed.
"Give me your wrist" she said coldly. Gerry wanted to cry but he kept it together and held out his wrist. She cut 6 line across his wrist deep and angry, exsentuating each one with a mean word "idiot" "dissappointment" "clumsy" until finally "Turn" as she washed the scissors. This was knew and he was scared but he turned anyway.
Then she hacked off his hair. It was long then and he loved it she'd yell at him to cut it but she never did, until that day. Tears streamed down his face, he choked out a sob as hes body shoke, he loved his hair long his loved his hair he hated it short.
When she was done he went to his and freyas room. She sat in a ball on the ground. "Gerry im-" she began. "Not now freya" he said as he flung himself under the covers and cryed. Blood stained the dirty sheets.
Gerry woke up to little hands shaking his side. "Gerrryyy" freya whined. "Waake uuuup" she says. Gerry smiles a little and continues to keep his eyes closed. "I know your awake" she accuses. He smiles a little more until he feels her climbing onto his bed. She rips the sheets off him and suddenly little hands are tickleing his waist. "Wake! Up!" She demands. Gerry bursts into a fit of giggles squirming and squrriling. "Ok, ok" he begs for mercy.
She smiles trimuphantly and slides off gerry. "Cmon, make me food" she says as she quietly walks out. Gerry sits up a smile on his face even if his eyes were heavy and his body hurt, his fondness out did those feelings every time.